Chapter Text
BEFORE
Nico can’t believe he’s doing this, on his birthday of all days. But there was something about coming down from the high of a party that intensified the loneliness that kept cropping up. If you asked him, Nico would say that he’s perfectly content. He doesn’t need a man to make him happy. He’s got plenty of other things like his sisters, his friends, his dog, his job. He’s not lonely in the sense that he doesn’t talk to people. But there’s always this feeling that comes up when he’s gone a whole day without talking to anyone but his dog or himself, or when he wants to hang out with friends and they’re all on dates.
So Nico wouldn’t say he’s lonely, but maybe he could do with a little mess me-time.
Which is how he finds himself scrolling through his camera roll at some ungodly hour past midnight. He should really turn on some lights to avoid eye strain, but there are a lot of things he should be doing and only one thing that’s actually capturing his attention.
He’s coming to a realization that he doesn’t take a lot of photos of himself. The most recent one is a photo of him eating a sandwich that Jason had taken to make fun of Nico. Suffice to say, that photo is going nowhere near a dating profile.
After another sad scroll, Nico finally caves and texts his sisters. He’s really hoping they won’t ask why he needs a photo, but he really can’t be that lucky.
Hazel: what kind of photo? are you applying for jobs?
Bianca: why?
He supposes Hazel has a point, so he responds to her first. Plus, she’s nicer. But he still can’t tell her why because she’ll probably tell Bianca and Nico thinks it’s too late— or maybe early— to deal with. He’d rather not ever deal with it, but alas, this has somehow become his life. Though, he could always just delete this sad attempt at getting a boyfriend and go back to doing it the old-fashioned way— hoping that he just somehow ran into the perfect guy.
Hazel: does this picture work? you have a nice smile
Nico saves the photo and quickly adds it to his profile, hoping Hazel won’t ask more questions. It’s not the greatest quality photo and it’s not quite recent, but it’ll have to do for now.
He looks back at the message from Bianca. He knows lying will only delay the pain and worsen the teasing when Bianca eventually finds out. But he’s really not ready to admit that he’s just signed up for a dating app.
Nico: I need a better profile picture
She’d find a decent enough photo hopefully. She was always taking pictures of Nico looking weird even when he was doing the most normal things like talking or sleeping. Gods, he hopes she doesn’t send a picture of him sleeping.
Bianca: you’re finally changing your profile pic??
She already sounds suspicious. Nico’s had the same profile picture since he started his job three years ago. He refused to change it because what was the point? He looked pretty much the same. He hasn’t grown or changed his hair or gotten a face tattoo.
Nico: do you have a photo or not?
Bianca: touchy, how’s this one?
Nico groans. It’s not a bad photo, but he is very obviously a teenager. And very obviously has just gotten out of bed.
Nico: terrible
Bianca: think it shows your true personality
Nico doesn’t think showing his true personality all over a dating profile is a good idea. He already does it just walking around, and that’s gotten him nowhere. Nico can count on one hand how many dates he’s gone on in the past two years. The number of successful dates is even fewer.
Nico: I’ve matured since then
Bianca: this photo says otherwise
Nico snorts. She’s sent him a photo from last night. He’s chugging a beer and flipping someone off, probably Bianca, at the same time.
Nico: I’m not trying to get fired
Bianca: I think your boss already knows that part of you
Nico: he doesn’t have proof of it and he never will
He thinks that Bianca’s let it be when she doesn’t respond. Nico uploads the few decent photos he can find plus the one Hazel sent. Now the prompts. Nico didn’t consider himself to be witty. At least not on purpose. But he didn’t want to sound painfully awkward.
It’s almost five in the morning before Nico’s profile looks somewhat presentable. He wishes he could see other profiles. Other people probably polished theirs to perfection. Nico’s probably looked like he was drunk. Which, okay, he was a little. But his profile didn’t have to look like he was.
Nico holds his breath as he hits finish. The published version of his profile looks a lot better than the template, but he still isn’t sure what kind of person would want to match with him. He scrolls through a few profiles before deciding he needed sleep. He didn’t want to drunk-like someone. He’s sober for that.
He’ll leave it to the matchmaker gods. Maybe someone will find him and save him all the effort of searching.
NOW
His phone chimes and Nico smiles when he sees the message. Or, more accurately, who the message is from. He doesn’t think he’s ever felt so ridiculously happy for his birthday party. Usually, he makes his friends beg to throw him one, and this year hadn’t been an exception. But he’d wanted them to win this time. He’d wanted a party.
If for nothing else but to spend time with his boyfriend. Lately, Ethan had been working long days at the office, and while Nico knew it was for a good cause, he couldn’t help but feel jealous. Why did Ethan spend more time with people he’d never met than his own boyfriend?
(He’s never asked that question, of course. He’s pretty sure Ethan would say something about Nico’s privileges and opportunities, how it was Ethan’s job to create those same opportunities for the people his organization helped. That Nico didn’t need Ethan like all the houseless people in the world did. And Nico knows that’s true. But he deserved some of Ethan’s time, too, right?)
But Ethan had tonight and tomorrow morning off, so Nico had him all to himself for at least twelve hours. Which was more time than they’d spent together all week. Granted, Nico had been busy, too, but he tried to make time for his friends and family as much as he could.
Nico’s jolted from his thoughts when his doorbell rings. Jason’s on the phone when he enters Nico’s apartment. He sounds like he’s talking to Piper. Maybe about glitter.
“You don’t want glitter, right?” Jason asks looking at Nico.
“Definitely not.”
“Thought so.” He goes back to the phone conversation. Nico can almost hear what PIper’s saying, but he chooses not to listen in. He’s sure he’ll get the summary as soon as Jason hangs up. Instead, he wanders into the kitchen and grabs something to eat.
Jason hangs up and helps himself to Nico’s chips.
“These aren’t for tonight, are they?” Jason asks.
“I’m not providing food for my own party,” Nico says.
“Fair enough. Also, Piper’s buying your cake. I told her no edible glitter. I don’t even know why that stuff exists.”
“Isn’t that just a marketing scheme?”
“Maybe. Either way, it’s gross. I think it’s just flavored plastic.”
Nico snorts. He’s never tried edible glitter and he has no desire to do so. He plops on the couch and Jason follows. Nico’s drawn a hard line at having the party at his place. He figures as the birthday boy, he shouldn’t have to be part of the cleanup party or have his apartment trashed in the process. Not that his friends would trash everything, but he wants to be able to come back to a clean, empty apartment. He could also leave whenever he wanted.
“So how’s Ethan?” Jason asks.
Nico shrugs. “He’s busy, but he should be here tonight.” He grabs his phone, excited to read the text from his boyfriend. He’d gone over the top on all of his birthday texts in the past two years, but Nico was still waiting for one this year.
“What’d he do this year?” Jason asks.
“He’s not coming.” Nico tries not to be disappointed, but maybe he’s more angry than upset.
Ethan: sorry, babe, can’t make it tonight
rob called in sick so I have to finish the presentation by myself
happy birthday!! I’ll make it up to you, I promise
Nico knows he’s being petty, but he doesn’t want Ethan to make it up to him. He wants Ethan to follow through on the promise he’d made several months ago when Nico mentioned how he always celebrated his birthdays. Sure parties were fun, but they were mainly excuses to hang out with all of his friends and family and eat good food.
“He’s not coming,” Jason repeats. “Seriously?”
“He’s got a presentation or something.” Nico isn’t sure how much presentations help the houseless people, but it seemed to be a major part of Ethan’s job. He’s never asked more than he had to because he honestly didn’t care to know. Ethan already volunteered so much information about his job that Nico could probably do it for him. Maybe better.
“That’s a crappy excuse. Your party isn’t until seven tonight. It takes him five hours to make a presentation?”
Nico shrugs. “I’m sure he has a lot of data or something.”
“Seems sketchy.”
“Whatever. He said he’ll make it up to me.”
“Still sucks.”
Nico is tired of the conversation. He already knows what his friends and family think of his boyfriend. They’d liked him at first, but he did suffer from having a one-track personality. Ethan’s biggest flaw seemed to be that he could only care about one thing at once. Which was proving to be annoying. And upsetting.
“So what kind of cake is Piper getting?”
“Chocolate on chocolate,” Jason says. “Obviously.”
Nico rolls his eyes. He’s known for his chocolate addiction. Ethan didn’t even like chocolate all that much, which might be a crime in Nico’s eyes. (Nico used to like it since he could eat Ethan’s chocolate.)
“And some vanilla ice cream for the rest of us. So we don’t all end up in a chocolate coma.”
“You guys are monsters,” Nico laughs. “That’s the best part.”
Jason hums. “If one could get drunk on chocolate, you’d be there.”
Nico doesn’t care. Chocolate was the god’s gift to mankind and Nico felt every right to relish in it.
“So he’s not even going to try to come? Like can’t the dude work more efficiently? Have you ever seen him type? Is he one of those types-with-only-one-finger guys?”
Nico can hear the question Jason wants to ask but isn’t going to. Because it’s Nico’s birthday. He’s nice enough to wait until tomorrow to ask the heartbreaking question.
“He types at an average speed. I don’t know why it takes him so long. I assume it’s because he’s doing twice the amount of work.”
Jason fixes him with a look that Nico would very much like to ignore.
“Look, it’s my birthday. Let’s hold off on any life-changing decisions until tomorrow.”
“That’s not what birthdays are for. Don’t you know how wishes work?”
“I know they won’t come true if I say it out loud,” Nico says.
“Fair enough.”
“So we’re not going to talk about my boyfriend all night, right? Or even part of the night?”
“I promise not to say anything. But no promises for anyone else. Gods knows I can’t make them shut up about anything they’re dead set on.”
Nico sighs. He’s well aware. All of his friends were the motivated, independent type. Which was great until it wasn’t. Like when his relationship of almost three years was failing and there wasn’t much Nico could do about it.