Work Text:
It all started with them taking many photo dives lately. Enough where Lu Guang had to rely on the power of microwaveable meals for the past two weeks as Cheng Xiaoshi spent dive after dive searching for someone’s lost password book.
Those two weeks was all it took for Lu Guang to develop a yearning for one of Cheng Xiaoshi’s self-proclaimed, ‘Chef Xiaoshi Specials’, specifically the ‘Noodles of the Xiaoshi Dorm’.
So instead of approaching Cheng Xiaoshi and asking him like a normal human being, Lu Guang went out to collect the known ingredients and desperately secretly hoped Cheng Xiaoshi would catch on. A slight oversight on his part because Cheng Xiaoshi, in fact, didn’t catch on, but Qiao Ling did.
Just as Lu Guang closed the container to the crushed flowers. Qiao Ling had popped into the kitchen, took one look, and lit up with excitement.
“Ooh,” She looked to Cheng Xiaoshi with sparkles in her eyes. “Are you making the noodles?”
Cheng Xiaoshi blinked himself back into the present. “What?” He looked at the ingredients over the counter, and Lu Guang tried his best to telepath his hope to Cheng Xiaoshi. “No.”
Lu Guang was not crestfallen. No, he wasn’t pouting. And no, his stomach didn’t choose that moment to growl at him wistfully.
“Oh,” Qiao Ling seemed so disappointed too. “What a shame.” That was all she said before she left, to which Cheng Xiaoshi turned to Lu Guang.
“You’re still going to help me with that one quest, right?”
All the sadness Lu Guang had, cleared away, because now he had a new plan,
Which is how they got to this.
“Lu Guang!” Cheng Xiaoshi screams. “Lu Guang, please save her!”
Lu Guang glances up from his phone with an unimpressed stare.
“Lu Guang please!” Cheng Xiaoshi screams again, tapping vigorously on his phone. “Save my Hu Tao!”
Lu Guang glances down to check the health bar. Beneath Hu Tao is an insanely low bar of red representing her health. Lu Guang knows she can be anywhere from 1 to 2,000 hp at the moment. His eyes move to the scene making Cheng Xiaoshi scream so much.
Hu Tao zips in and out of focus as she sprints for her life around the level 100 Ruin Hunter. Lu Guang adjusts his Noelle, who is safely hidden behind a pillar, for a better view of Cheng Xiaoshi’s near character death as the Ruin Hunter becomes a deadly screwdriver.
“How is your hp?” Lu Guang asks casually.
He watches as Cheng Xiaoshi mistimes Spirit Soother and loses more hp.
“152!” Cheng Xiaoshi yelps as he sprints out of the red zone of an incoming lazarbeam.
“Interesting,” Lu Guang hums, then reaches for his boba tea and takes a long sip.
He could switch to Zhongli for a moment, drop Planet Befall, and give Cheng Xiaoshi the small break window to go into his inventory for food, but where's the fun in that. Lu Guang takes another long sip of his tea.
“Lu Guang please!” Cheng Xiaoshi literally shrieks as a laser nearly obliterates Hu Tao. “I’ll make the noodles again! I promise! Just save her please!”
And that’s his cue. Lu Guang sets his boba tea aside and dashes into action with his 3k Defense Noelle.
At his entrance, Cheng Xiaoshi’s Hu Tao takes refuge out of lasering range, as Noelle activates Breastplate and Sweeping Time, while swinging with her level 40 debate club. She does only 168 damage each swing but heals almost 2k.
When Lu Guang sees Hu Tao’s hp bar back to full, he switches to Zhongli, and drops his order-demanding meteor before walking, calmly back to his pillar as Cheng Xiaoshi tags back in.
Ruin Hunter defeated, and three precious chests claimed, Cheng Xiaoshi sets his phone aside with a long exhale then stares at Lu Guang.
Lu Guang meets his gaze and takes a long sip of his tea.
Cheng Xiaoshi gives him a dirty look before standing with a huff and leaves for the kitchen.
Lu Guang watches him go, a smile curling on his lips.
Mission Accomplished.