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It all revolved around the simplest of gestures.
He'd not even been paying Jin much mind while assessing the different snack boxes, a contemplative furrow knitting his brows as he read over the nutrition label, before inevitably shrugging, and placing Jin's preferred brand in their basket.
Then he heard Jin say something. That sounded like. Atsuhiro blinked, rounding on the other man. "What was that...you just said?"
It had fallen out so quickly, Jin hadn't even been sure he'd said the words aloud. They'd been conjured up plenty of other times, but like so much else he could say, he'd never let himself say it before. Too afraid of the impact, and he couldn't say he wasn't still afraid. But, after this long, was there any way to take something like that back?
No, not really. It was out there now, and they both knew exactly what he'd said, he was fairly sure of that despite the question he'd gotten in response. So, he met Atsuhiro's gaze and tried one more time. "I love you."
It had been as he'd thought.
Atsuhiro was frozen.
Stuck between the candy shelf, and the instant coffee shelf. More than a little dumbstruck because it had been several decades since he'd been in a comparable situation. And it had been several more decades since he and Jin had gotten involved, and they'd managed to sail by without ever saying such words to each other.
"Because I agreed on the tako flavored chips?"
It had been a bad idea, hadn't it?
The two of them were fine as they were, hell, Jin had already pushed Atsuhiro intBetween the candy and the coffeeo enough. And this would be it, the final straw, wouldn't it? But still. At least now it was out there, the weight of what they'd never been able to say could lift off of him that little bit. He shifted uncomfortably, skin crawling anxiously as he thought about the mess he’d just gotten himself into.
Atsuhiro realized in an instant how what he’d said might have been perceived as a deflection and quickly darted to catch Jin's hand in case he tried to run away. "Jin..."
He’d been caught before he could even react, brain moving so quickly he could almost hear the cogs turning as he thought of what to say next. He looked between that hand and the face of the man it was connected to.
" Yeah, it's 'cause of some dumb chips! It's just...everything you do." Those weren't words he'd ever said to another person, not romantically. He wasn't sure why he thought now was the time to start.
Atsuhiro felt like. Well, like a villain.
Because despite how he felt for the other, and he did feel, there was the careful part of him that demanded he take any genuine emotion and hide it behind layers of mask. A part of him that liked to remind him that he was actually a selfish cowardly thing that could only take things so long as they aided him in some material way.
Did that include Jin's heart? Well. It was for Jin’s heart that he'd quit the old ways, and instead found himself coasting through domestic mundanity. Surely, he could have this...just because?
"I love everything you do too," he said, realized his cowardice, and tried again. "I love you too."
His grip on the other's hand tightened automatically, both of them still stuck in this holding pattern of staring, hands locked. Jin could feel his heart in his throat, now officially overwhelmed though in probably the best way he'd ever been. Hearing it back hadn't been what he'd expected would happen but...
It was out there now. And it was from the only person it could really matter coming from. So. What did they do now just...continue on like normal? Like he hadn't just said something that shook them both to their cores?
No. So instead he leapt forward, pulling Atsuhiro into a sloppy, and frankly inappropriate for the setting, kiss.
There was something spectacular about Jin's face as he processed Atsuhiro’s response. A familiar sort of adrenaline rush hit him, like the high from a successful heist or performance. Was the kiss inappropriate? Yes. But when had they ever cared about such conventions? This moment wasn't about rejections of any sort. So he wrapped his arms around Jin, and returned the kiss. Laughing with pleasure and amusement into his partner's lips.
The immediate response egged him on just enough and Jin’s arms circled Atsuhiro in return. Groceries were forgotten, basket clattering to the floor, as his hands slipped up Atsu’s back to tangle into his hair. There was a gasp from down the aisle which just made him snort into Atsuhiro’s face while they kept kissing. Meanwhile, Atsuhiro peeked at the woman down the way just enough to make eye contact. He was feeling smug and it showed in the way he grinned into his lover’s mouth.
Who cared what these people thought of them, or what they were doing? Jin was fairly certain he’d never felt a rush like this. He broke away, just to look at Atsuhiro one more time.
“I love you.”
In some ways it felt like a first kiss all over again, a trace of it tingling on his lips as Jin pulled away. Still riding the high of saying those words. It wasn't supposed to feel like a game changer, just another social construct to make light of all these years... and yet at the same time the dam was broken. For all those moments Atsuhiro had almost said it, then bit his tongue.
"I love you too," he sighed in between. "Now, cut it out before people get the wrong idea and start calling us soft."
He was fit to continue grocery shopping, but instead of pulling away completely, slotted his hands in Jin's. Not willing to let go just yet.
Pulling away, Jin followed Atsuhiro’s lead with a nod, still smiling brightly to himself. He was giddy, walking through the store hand in hand. Everything had been unfamiliar territory for them lately, but finally it was the good kind.
It was such a mundane thing to be happy about, but somehow that made the feelings all the more potent. Knowing he could be happy doing anything with the man next to him; no matter how tedious the task, Atsu would be just as happy.
It had been a long time of them tiptoeing around all of it. Airing all of this, especially in public, felt empowering. Jin could hardly remember the last time he felt like that. As they wandered the store, his hand would squeeze Atsuhiro’s ever so slightly, that easy reminder of the sentiment.