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Holding Amelia Blight was not how Lucia Noceda thought she was going to spend her Friday night. But as she wrapped her arms around the teal-haired witch, she decided she’d need to run through the events of the evening to figure out how she ended up in this position.
It had all started so innocently: Luz had asked whether she could go hang out with Amity at the library. It just so happened Eda had some other commitments, so the only person in the house who could give her permission to go was Lucia. After giving in to her sister’s begging, Lucia reluctantly hopped on the staff with her sister and flew down to the library, where a nervous Amity was pacing on the steps outside. Luz seemed too wrapped up in her own thoughts to notice Amity talking about how “hanging out in the evening doesn’t change anything… does it?”. Smirking to herself, Lucia landed near Amity and said hello to the younger Blight, who she was on decent terms with. After bidding farewell to the duo – and only after warning Luz to be ready to go on time – Lucia shoved her hands in her jacket pockets and walked down the mostly quiet streets of Bonesborough. It was a crisp night, chilly enough to be cold when the wind blew, but still perfectly comfortable in a jacket. She probably spent an hour distracting herself by looking at street stalls with night vendors hawking goods and grabbing a bite to eat. It was only as she lounged on a bench that she decided she ought to check her phone. After killing another half an hour or so, Lucia gave up trying to entertain herself with her phone, and decided to go for a walk. She found a park a few blocks down and decided to explore it. As her feet crunched along the rocky path, Lucia thought back to her life before the Boiling Isles; she’d hardly characterize her time on Earth as “great”, but she had always enjoyed stretching her legs and walking in the woods. Lost in nostalgia, she hardly noticed a young woman on a park bench. It was only as she approached that she recognized the shuddering body before her.
Even in the dark, the familiar shape of Amelia Blight instantly activated Lucia’s fight-or-flight reaction. Lucia quietly moved to turn back, until she heard the sound of a choked-back sob. Unable to restrain her curiosity, she strained to hear what Amelia was doing, losing focus on where she was stepping. She realized her mistake when she heard a loud *CRACK*, only to look down at her right foot, which had snapped a small branch in half. Whipping her head back to look at Amelia, she saw the witch snap her head up and look directly at her.
“Who’s there? You can’t hide!” Amelia’s voice had an unexpectedly shaky quality to it that was unfamiliar to Lucia. Despite her obvious distress, Amelia didn’t hesitate to summon a familiar pink flame in the palm of her hand. Making a split second decision, Lucia reasoned her odds were better confronting Amelia than making a run for it, which might result in her casting deadly spells; at least if she greeted Amelia she’d buy herself some time to look for escape paths. Shuffling around awkwardly, Lucia turned to face Amelia.
“Uh, hey Blight?” Lucia managed weakly, wincing at how guilty she sounded. Lucia had always considered herself a brave person, and if this situation had been with anyone else but Amelia, she’d have been perfectly fine talking to them. But Amelia Blight wasn’t just anyone. She was Lucia’s nemesis (but they also hung out a lot, so kind of the closest friend she had?), perpetually angry (but also really cute when she smiled), violent (but also somewhat protective), and (objectively, not that Lucia cared or anything) gorgeous. Really, the way Lucia saw it, some higher power must have had it out for her; it was really an “out of the frying pan, into the fire” situation: first Amelia tried to kill her for a couple of months, then once their relationship mellows Lucia finds herself struck by such an enormous crush that she can barely function around the witch!
But this situation was more dangerous than normal. First, their conciliation had come on even terms, out of a mutual respect. But now, the dynamic was skewed against Amelia, because she was so obviously vulnerable. Lucia didn’t see it as all that unreasonable to fear that Amelia would decide to even the playing field by attacking her. Second, and much more importantly, the last time they had seen each other, they had gotten into a fight. It had been a bad situation from the beginning, with Amelia making passive-aggressive, and sometimes outright insulting, comments from the moment she saw Lucia in abominations class all the way through lunch. When Lucia finally snapped and told her off, Amelia had responded predictably, upping the ante. Lucia, never one to back down from a challenge, had matched her increasingly out of line behavior with antics of her own, a fight only being narrowly avoided thanks to the timely intervention of the bell. All in all, Lucia felt she had every reason to be terrified of the emotionally volatile girl in front of her. Instead of a “You’re dead, Noceda” or even a “You have some nerve coming here” however, all Lucia received was deafening silence. Immediately, her mind jumped to the worst possible scenario: she’s so angry she’s going to kill me, and hide my body in this park in the dark, where no one will find me. Lucia was only brought out of her spiraling catastrophizing by a bitter chuckle from Amelia.
“Titan, of course it’s you.” Lucia shifted from foot to foot uncomfortably.
“Uh, yeah, it’s me…” Lucia trailed off uncertainly, waiting for Amelia’s reaction. Again, there was a long pause. When Amelia finally broke it, her voice was unrecognizable to Lucia.
“Is this what you wanted? Is this you winning? I hope you’re happy.” Despite the obvious fury and bitterness, Amelia didn’t sound like she normally did when she was angry or bitter. Her voice sounded, well, shattered, for lack of a better word. It was raspy, she clearly wasn’t done crying, and she was half mumbling. Gradually, Lucia felt concern overtake terror as she hesitantly stepped towards the bench.
“Um, no, I’m pretty sure this isn’t what I wanted,” she paused timidly, looking over Amelia’s huddled form, “Are you okay?”. Lucia cursed internally for asking such a stupid question, grimacing in expectation of a cutting remark, but instead Amelia laughed.
“Am I okay? Am I okay? AM I OKAY?” Lucia leaned back nervously, holding her hands out in front of her.
“Okay, wow. I’m gonna take that as a no…” Lucia looked at Amelia, who had initially had a wild look in her eye, but now looked pitifully desperate. As Lucia opened her mouth, all she could think about was how much she was going to regret her next words, but she said them anyway. “Alright, that was a stupid question, sorry. What I meant to say was do you need anything?” Amelia looked at her, and something new flickered in her golden eyes.
“Do I-” Amelia paused as realization set in. Burying her face in her hands, she half-yelled, “You really don’t get it, do you?” Lucia stepped back, looking around to make sure she knew where to run.
“I know you’re not okay. If you tell me to leave, I will. All you have to do is say the word, and I will leave you to do… whatever it is you’ve been doing.” Amelia didn’t respond. Sighing, Lucia sat down on the bench next to Amelia. “But I’m not going to leave you if you don’t want me to, Amelia.” Lucia’s use of Amelia’s first name surprised even herself with its audacity, but she tried to keep her voice even and calming. Without saying a word, Amelia looked up at Lucia. She seemed at a loss for words as she looked at the human, her expression indecipherable. Lucia was already struggling to sit down next to Amelia before. Getting this, this… look was just too much for her to bear. She wanted to throw her arms around Amelia and never let go, to sweep her off her feet, to perform any number of other romantic cliches. She couldn’t bear the tension, and she couldn’t hold Amelia’s gaze. Luckily, her clumsiness gave her a way out. She accidentally brushed Amelia’s arm with her hand, recoiling at the touch. “You’re freezing! How long have you been out here?” Lucia demanded, her romantic stupor having firmly evaporated.
“Uh, I dunno, a few hours?” Amelia replied hoarsely, not looking Lucia in the eye. Lucia frowned, knowing it had been a cool day in the afternoon, and a chilly evening. Now that the sun had gone down, it was a little cold for her, and she was wearing a jacket. As she looked at Amelia, she realized that the witch was shivering.
“Are you serious? You’re going to freeze if you don’t cover up.” Lucia couldn’t help but let some of the concern normally reserved for Luz creep into her voice.
“I’m fine, it’s whatever…” Amelia tried, trailing off as she saw Lucia take off her jacket.
“No, no it’s not. Here, wear my jacket, it’ll warm you up.” Amelia shot up from her hunched position to a more normal sitting one.
“No! You’ll be cold if I wear it! No that won’t be necessary, thanks though!” Lucia looked unimpressed. She thrust the jacket towards Amelia.
“Put the jacket on, or I make you.” To Lucia’s great surprise, Amelia tentatively reached out and grabbed the jacket. She slowly put it on, sliding her arms into the sleeves and shrugging it onto her shoulders. Lucia considered herself generally pretty controlled. She might even go as far as to say that she was able to grapple with her embarrassingly huge crush on Amelia without being too obvious. But even in the dark, looking at Amelia in her jacket, Lucia felt her heart hammer against her rib cage. She felt her cheeks warm as she realized her mouth was actually hanging open as she stared at Amelia, promptly shutting it and clearing her throat. “Do you wanna talk about it?” Lucia offered, still trying to recover from her humiliating reaction to Amelia in her jacket.
“No.”
“Alright, do you want t-”
“Maybe? Yes? No? I don’t know what I want.” Lucia paused, trying to process Amelia’s outburst. Luckily for her, she didn’t have to respond, as Amelia kept talking after a short pause. “I’m here because I’m miserable, though I’m pretty sure even you could pick up on that.” Amelia ignored Lucia’s indignant noise to take an unsteady breath. “What caused it this time? My parents yelled at me, same as they always do. I got into trouble and was told by multiple authority figures I’m hopeless, as per usual.” Amelia stopped, and Lucia realized she was waiting for a response. Unable to stop herself, she said the first thing that came to her mind.
“What do you mean ‘this time’? Is this a regular thing?” Amelia laughed bitterly.
“You could set your watch to me doing this every week. Sometimes twice, and once even three times. Nobody knows because there’s no weirdo who wanders this deep into the park this late at night… except you, I guess.” Lucia scratched the back of her head.
“Wow… thanks for the compliment.” Amelia stared at Lucia. “What?” Lucia asked, her mouth feeling dry.
“If I tell you something, will you say anything to anyone else?” Lucia returned her gaze for as long as she could, only breaking it off to look at the cuffs of her jacket, which were hanging loosely off of Amelia’s hands.
“I was kinda under the impression that this whole conversation was strictly confidential.” Amelia looked relieved.
“Good. Because if you ever say anything about this, I’ll rip out your tongue.”
“Good to know.” Lucia’s voice was definitely a few octaves higher. Amelia didn’t say anything for a while, and then she broke Lucia, all at once.
First she slid next to Lucia on the bench, and then she rested her head on Lucia’s shoulder. Now, Lucia had imagined this moment more times than she could count. If she ever divulged the number of daydreams she’d had about Amelia, her dignity would cease to exist. But despite all of the hoping against hope, all the dreaming, and all the meticulously thought out ideas for finding an excuse to get Amelia in that position, nothing prepared Lucia for the real thing. Her thoughts went something along the lines of Amelia is touching me. She’s putting her head on my shoulder. Amelia, Amelia, Amelia… and so on and so forth. When she spoke, Lucia listened intently, even though she wasn’t sure she was capable of responding in her almost intoxicated state.
“I told you that various people yelled at me this week, but that that was normal. There was one thing this week which doesn’t normally happen, which drove me to be here, doing this.”
“What is it?” Lucia asked, her voice barely above a whisper.
“I did what I always do. Whenever I get close to having a genuine, personal connection with someone, I throw it all away.” Oh, Lucia thought, the events of the lunchroom rushing back to her painfully quickly. Amelia continued, “I get so wrapped up in trying not to be vulnerable, I drive people away, so that they can’t hurt me.” Amelia looked at Lucia, and it was clear she had begun crying again. “This time, Lucia, the person I drove away was you, and I hate myself for it because you were the only person who ever gave me a second chance.” Lucia tried to speak, but the words wouldn’t leave her throat.
“Oh.” was all she could manage. Amelia recoiled from Lucia, leaning so far back she was nearly falling off the bench.
“You hate me now, don’t you? I should leave, to make this hurt less than it already does…” Amelia turned and swung her knees around, bending them and preparing to get up.
“Amelia, wait.” Lucia said, grabbing Amelia’s wrist. “I don’t hate you.” This got Amelia’s attention, and she froze. Possessed by a boldness she hadn’t known she was capable of, Lucia took Amelia’s hands in her own, causing Amelia to turn to face her. “Amelia, I never hated you.” Amelia looked confused.
“How? I was terrible to you!” Lucia shrugged.
“I’m not gonna pretend you made the best first impression, but I never came around to despising you.” It helped that you were the girl of my dreams, her brain added unhelpfully. Amelia looked down. Lucia squeezed her hands. “Amelia, I’m worried about you. This is not a healthy coping mechanism, and if you’re regularly this upset, then you’ve got pretty significant problems.” Amelia, for once, didn’t make any snarky comments.
“I know. I’m sorry.” Lucia frowned.
“What are you apologizing for?”
“For worrying you? I was trying to be nice! I’m not used to this sort of stuff…” Lucia smiled, and squeezed Amelia’s hands again.
“You don’t owe it to me to take care of yourself, you owe it to yourself.” Amelia didn’t say anything for a beat.
“Lucia, I appreciate your concern, but this is kind of my life. I live in Blight Manor, I go to Hexside, and I get into a ton of trouble.” Lucia looked at Amelia, thinking before she responded.
“It doesn’t have to be, Amelia. You don’t have to go back to them.” Lucia spoke so softly that she could barely hear herself. She felt nervous about what she said, as she was going out on a limb to make such a tremendous offer. But when Amelia looked at her, eyes shining with an unfamiliar hopefulness, Lucia knew she had made the right choice.
“Really?” Amelia asked. There was something so raw about her voice, wall after painfully-constructed wall dissipating in an instant.
“Of course.” Lucia replied, pulling Amelia into a hug. The two stayed like that for a long time, Lucia wasn’t sure if it was five minutes, fifteen, or even an hour. Finally, she softly tapped Amelia’s shoulder.
“What is it?” Amelia asked, a nervous edge in her voice, as if she was afraid Lucia might tell her at any second that she took back her offer.
“It’s just that I have to pick up Luz from the library, she hung out with Amity there.” Amelia froze.
“I don’t want to intrude…” Lucia smiled earnestly.
“Nonsense, you’re perfectly welcome to-” Lucia looked at Amelia, who looked so completely fragile, and realized that the witch didn’t want anyone else to see her like this. “You know what? I’ll grab Luz and then I’ll swing by the park and pick you up once I’ve put her to bed, okay?” Amelia gave her a small, grateful smile, and her heart melted.
“Thanks.” As Lucia strode away, Amelia ran up to her.
“Oh, and Lucia? Tell Amity where I’m going. Tell her there’s a way out.” Lucia nodded, and hefted Owlbert off her shoulder. Before she could get into flying position, Amelia leaned over and kissed her on the cheek. “Don’t keep me waiting too long, Lucia.” Lucia touched the part of her cheek Amelia kissed, saying something smart like “Uh-duh” and then flew away into the night, still feeling the warmth of where Amelia kissed her.
As Lucia thought back on the night, and then looked down at Amelia, who was peacefully sleeping in her arms, a goofy smile stretched across her face. She hadn’t planned to spend her Friday night holding Amelia Blight, but it sure seemed like she’d have to clear her Friday nights to come. Running her hand through Amelia’s teal mane, Lucia decided that wasn’t such a bad thing.