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Yoo Joonghyuk was a first-year student in high school, who no one would go near.
Not because he was strange or looked bad, but because of the scary aura that always surrounded him. Many girls and even boys were attracted to him as he had a very handsome face accompanied by a great height compared to others his age. Anyone who saw him from afar would think that he looked like the protagonist of those action-packed stories where the main character was a teenager.
However, anyone who tried to talk to him immediately ran away. As handsome as he was, he couldn't hide his expression. It was as if he was always angry about something, with a scowl on his face and that intense look that seemed to say "if you come near him, you're dead". No one even remembered his voice well because he hardly ever spoke, only being forced to talk back a few times because of his teachers.
As antisocial as he was, he had excellent grades, even fighting for first place in his generation. Yoo Joonghyuk was a mystery.
What no one knew was that in reality, Yoo Joonghyuk just didn't know how to communicate and when someone talked to him, he made a face because he had no idea what they wanted him for. It was his "What do you need from me?" expression, but no one really understood him.
That's how he spent at least the first three weeks in that school, he had no one by his side.
Until a popular sophomore came back to school.
[...]
Kim Dokja was fed up with the stares he was getting. While he was popular, it was not because he was a model student, but because he was quiet but had a peculiar charm that attracted people with more power to him.
In reality, Kim Dokja got along well with most of the student council despite always looking like a sourpuss. Since his freshman year, he had been contemplated to be a part of the student council, but he refused because he felt he was not cut out for it. President Han Sooyoung held him in high esteem since he helped her with the planning of a fundraising event, it was as if Kim Dokja had a knack for doing business. The vice president, Yoo Sangah agreed with her to recruit him.
“I'm not very good at speaking in front of many people, and I don't think I'm responsible enough to attend all the meetings, I'm sorry.”
That had been his response when they proposed it. They were both disappointed when he turned them down, but they respected his decision. However, even though he was not part of the council, they still treated him as a friend, or asked him for some advice and Kim Dokja always helped them if he could.
This treatment between them had generated a lot of rumours and everyone thought that maybe Kim Dokja would be their next student president. Because of that, several people knew him or tried to get close to him by feigning friendship. But the boy had always been suspicious of everyone, so he did his best to keep those people away. Everything remained cordial, and no one got angry with him.
Until that first day of school, in his second year, he lost his temper.
Being someone recognised by the presidents had its advantages, but that didn't save him from getting a suspension for hitting some guys who were trying to bully the first graders. Obviously, he lost and got beat up too, but the satisfaction of getting the others expelled still outweighed the loss.
He was passing through the corridors on his way to his first class and several students who already knew him, gave him a polite wave or smiled at him. He noticed that among the people greeting him, there were new faces and he imagined that they were first years trying to move up the ranks.
‘Poor deluded,’ he thought as he waved back. ‘They're not going to get anything from me.’
The truth was that Kim Dokja had had a very depressing school life in middle school when he was still a boy. He was bullied because he was a typical boy who liked to read a lot of books to learn instead of making friends, and being that way made the teachers see him as an exemplary student because of his good grades, but the more resentful students were envious of him.
Not a day went by that he wasn't picked on, even the few people who became his friends eventually did the same to him just so they wouldn't be the target. Since then, Kim Dokja vowed to change at his next school so that he would not go through the same thing again. He didn't want to be trampled on again.
Luckily, in this school everything seemed to be more orderly. Kim Dokja liked that even though he didn't have anyone relatively close to him, apart from those girls on the council, he was still treated well. His grades were very high and no one complained or envied him for that.
Many would think that maybe he was a lonely boy, that despite having the possibility, he had no real friends. But he was happy that way. ‘I don't need to make strong ties here. When I finish studying, no one will remember me and I won't remember anyone’. It was a perfect plan for Kim Dokja.
However, all that tranquility changed when he bumped into the best freshman, Yoo Joonghyuk, who was passing right by where Kim Dokja was almost running because of how late it was.
They collided and many of the books the junior had in his hands scattered on the ground. Kim Dokja bent down to help him pick it all up.
“Sorry about that, I didn't notice.”
The other without raising his head just nodded as he made a slight sound of confirmation. They finished gathering their things and both stood up. Then Kim Dokja's gaze traveled from the boy's long legs, up his big chest to his face, and he felt his legs freeze. 'Oh no, he's really angry.'
Yoo Joonghyuk's expression wasn't good as usual, in fact he looked even scarier. It was as if he was really angry.
Although in reality, the poor boy was ashamed of having dropped all his things and didn't know if he should also apologise to the other boy for bumping into him. He was very big and the guy he bumped into was shorter than him, and he looked delicate.
“Hey, I'm really sorry, I don't want any trouble, you know? I just came back after being suspended, please can you leave things alone,” he was almost begging.
Yoo Joonghyuk felt more confused seeing that this guy was acting like this. That only caused his frown to crease even more.
“Fine, I'll give you money for this one time but don't make a fuss,” he said as he took out something from his pocket.
His proposal had automatically come out of his mouth, it was something that worked for him in his previous high school to quickly drive away those who annoyed him.
‘How can such a handsome boy make such a scary face,’ Kim Dokja thought after getting a better look at him. And even though he felt a little scared, he could still deal with him. He was definitely not easily intimidated anymore.
He took the younger man's hand and gave him the coins he managed to pull out.
“Now we’re even.”
And he left immediately to avoid further conflict.
Yoo Joonghyuk was perplexed and his expression didn't change all day, causing them to avoid him even more.
He understood that he had created a misunderstanding with that boy, and this time he couldn't just sit idly by because there was money involved. ‘It's as if I had swindled him,’ he thought.
His conscience would not allow him to rest easy knowing that. So the next day he started looking for the boy to clear everything up and give him back his money.
First he found out his name and then he went to look for him where he was supposed to have classes and managed to see him, unfortunately, Kim Dokja was talking to other guys and Yoo Joonghyuk couldn't go and talk to him.
Something about the boy's attitude caught his attention though. Because of his personality, he had become very good at observing people. While he saw the others laughing and chatting like true friends, Kim Dokja was just listening, and Yoo Joonghyuk felt like he was alone. Unlike him, who all seemed to shy away from his presence, it was as if Kim Dokja was always surrounded by people but never paid attention to them.
Yoo Joonghyuk wanted to keep watching Kim Dokja for a while longer. And it was easily a week later when he finally decided to talk to him.
He found him alone in the library. Yoo Joonghyuk had seen that Kim Dokja was reading books all the time, but in the library he noticed that they were not only academic books but also fantasy or action novels. For the first time, the redoubtable Yoo Joonghyuk's face softened.
Apparently the two of them had similar tastes. That only made him more confident to go and talk to him.
He walked over to the table where Kim Dokja was sitting and sat down across from him. The older boy was so engrossed in reading that he didn't see him afterwards.
Until Yoo Joonghyuk, he placed the money he wanted to give him, on the table, right under his gaze.
Kim Dokja looked away from his book and that's when he saw Yoo Joonghyuk. He didn't know how to react, he feared the worst, however before he could even scream, the bigger one started to speak and Kim Dokja felt himself getting lost in his voice.
“I didn't need your money, I'll give it back to you.”
It took Kim Dokja a few seconds to respond, but he recognised him immediately.
“You weren't going to extort money from me?”
“Why would I do that?”
“Maybe because you had that scary expression like the one you have now.”
Yoo Joonghyuk blinked then. He ducked his head and started scratching his head, then looked up and even though he was still making that mean face, a soft red colour appeared on his cheeks.
“That's the way my face always is, sorry for scaring you.”
Kim Dokja stood silently gazing at the boy. He still had a bad expression, however he immediately noticed that he was just embarrassed. That's when he realised that he was really just someone who had trouble communicating. Kim Dokja relaxed in his chair and leaned back.
“No, I'm sorry for judging you, uh, tell me your name.”
“Yoo Joonghyuk, first-year student.”
“Then you're my hoobae. Nice to meet you, I'm Kim Dokja, sophomore.”
Again, Kim Dokja saw Yoo Joonghyuk blushing even though he was pouting. He found it very interesting, until something happened that made his breath catch.
“I know who you are, sunbae.” Yoo Joonghyuk, for the first time, relaxed his gaze.
His face revealed what appeared to be a smile. A faint smile on that beautiful face made Kim Dokja feel stupid and unconsciously talked about it.
“Wow, you should smile more often, it's cute.”
As soon as he said that, the smile disappeared and turned back into a frown and a grumpy frown, although the pink hue on the younger boy's face was still there.
Kim Dokja found Yoo Joonghyuk fascinating.
After that meeting, the older boy started to see Yoo Joonghyuk more often, it was easy to find him in the crowd because of his height. He would greet him with a smile, but from the other, he only received the same serious face as always.
Some were surprised to see Kim Dokja interacting with someone younger, and especially because it was the dreaded freshman that everyone avoided. Every time they saw them, they wondered why the sophomore kept talking to him when the junior was looking at him like that. Wasn't he intimidating him? Everyone admired Kim Dokja even more for his bravery.
But the admired sophomore learned to differentiate Yoo Joonghyuk's mood throughout the time they spent together. They were small details that one would only notice if one took the task of being close to that boy.
“Joonghyuk-ah, are you good at video games,” he asked him one day after returning from holiday.
“Hm,” he replied in affirmation.
“Joonghyuk-ah, I told you that you should talk more and not just answer with sounds or monosyllables.”
“Yes, Dokja sunbae.”
Kim Dokja felt proud every time he managed to find something new in Yoo Joonghyuk. But he felt even better when he saw him being more and more relaxed with him. Now it was very easy for him to see Yoo Joonghyuk being just a normal guy without anything scary.
“Then I'll invite you to play with me on this one.”
He took out a small video game console and showed him the game. Yoo Joonghyuk took out his own console and surprised Kim Dokja when he showed him how good he was at games.
“You are very amazing, Yoo Joonghyuk.”
“Dokja sunbae is too.”
“Actually, video games aren't really my thing, but I do use them to distract myself a bit. I'm more of a reader.”
“Sunbae, you're more amazing because you decided to be my friend.” A nice smile appeared on his face as he spoke.
And there it was again. The problem Kim Dokja did find about his hoobae, was the fact that he could be very honest with him. It was as if the initial embarrassment he felt before when talking to him had never existed. And Kim Dokja was always mesmerised in Yoo Joonghyuk's smile.
‘If this guy wanted it, he'd be a great heartthrob,’ he thought.
More than half of the school year had already passed, it was now very normal for everyone to see Yoo Joonghyuk following Kim Dokja faithfully. And that also led to the thought that maybe the younger one wasn't so scary.
Again they began to try to talk to him. Some successfully managed to exchange words with him, and realised that he was actually a good boy. But others couldn't get past a murderous look. How could Kim Dokja be friends with someone like that?
Yoo Joonghyuk started to communicate more with his classmates, helping out from time to time at events, he still wasn't able to have many friends but at least they didn't avoid him anymore.
Kim Dokja once saw how a group of boys were around him, he wanted to smile because at last his precious hoobae was making friends. But something had him uneasy, ‘Why do I feel bad? Am I bad for wanting Yoo Joonghyuk to just be nice to me?’
Kim Dokja felt that wasn't right and preferred to walk away and not talk to him for a while. ‘It's better that he learns to make more friends, it's not fair to chain him only to me.’
However, Yoo Joonghyuk's thinking and feelings didn't feel like that at all. He really appreciated Kim Dokja a lot. Not only that.
By now, the younger boy had realised that spending his time with his sunbae wasn't just because he loved him as a friend or because of the respect he had for him. Yoo Joonghyuk was physically attracted to his sunbae.
It was strange for him to realise this because he had never experienced it before. He had to research even on the internet and that's when he found out that he liked Kim Dokja in a different way. The younger one didn't know if it was right to tell the older one about it. ‘What if he looks at me with disgust? What if he moves away from me?’
Those were his biggest fears. That's why when Kim Dokja stopped talking to him or hanging out with him for a while, Yoo Joonghyuk got scared. He again didn't want to talk to anyone more than necessary. His expression softened back to his usual terrified expression, but it was only because of the worry he had.
‘He must have found out, but how?’ Yoo Joonghyuk started to get depressed.
And then, the last month of school came. It was February, and while Yoo Joonghyuk was still miserable, he remembered Kim Dokja's birthday.
On the other hand, Kim Dokja, since he stopped talking to his hoobae almost a month ago, had also been having a hard time. On the one hand, he felt guilty because he knew that if he disappeared like that, it would only worry the younger one, and on the other hand, he himself felt lonely. ‘I shouldn't have become so close to him.’
Kim Dokja for the first time realised that he was indeed lonely. And soon it would soon be his birthday, a date that hardly anyone knew about and which went unnoticed due to its proximity to the famous "day of love" and the end of the school year. He had wanted to invite Yoo Joonghyuk to his house to hang out that day, his mother would surely have been happy to know that her son was not a loner. Kim Dokja, wanted to keep talking to Yoo Joonghyuk.
Just when he thought it would be another normal birthday for him, a message arrived on his mobile phone. It was his hoobae.
["Kim Dokja sunbae, please come to the backyard of the school after school."]
Kim Dokja's heart began to pound with anticipation. He didn't understand why but he was very happy about that message. His hoobae didn't hate him for leaving him out for so long. As soon as the classes were over, he immediately left for the appointed place.
When he arrived, he noticed that Yoo Joonghyuk was a bit nervous. He just smiled at the sight of him.
“Dokja sunbae, I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable, I apologize,” he said as soon as he was in front of Kim Dokja.
The older kept smiling at him.
“You didn't bother me, Joonghyuk-ah.”
“Why did you walk away then?”
“That's... I just wanted you to be more independent, to make other friends besides me.”
“It's true that I talk to more people now, but Dokja sunbae is the only one with whom I want to be close.”
The sincerity that radiated from Yoo Joonghyuk's gaze only made that sweet rhythm in his heart unstable. His precious hoobae really treasured him. Kim Dokja felt his face start to burn.
“How can you say something like that so easily?” he asked in the midst of his embarrassment.
“It's because it's about you. Happy birthday Dokja sunbae.”
Yoo Joonghyuk took out a small book from his backpack and handed it to him. It was a book that Kim Dokja had mentioned several months ago and it said that he was saving up to get it because the author would be autographing it personally and it would be in limited edition, so it was going to cost a lot.
Kim Dokja felt there was nothing better than that birthday present.
“I didn't think you would remember my words, or my birthday.”
“I remember everything about you, and that's why...”
This time, Yoo Joonghyuk took out a small box adorned with a white ribbon, stood very close to Kim Dokja and with a slight bow handed it to him while saying a few words.
“Kim Dokja sunbae, I have come to confess my feelings, I really like you.”
The older boy now froze without being able to fully process those words. The box contained some homemade chocolates. Yoo Joonghyuk had made them.
“I don't expect you to reciprocate, you might find it a bad thing, or you just don't like me in the same way, but please don't push me away again.”
Yoo Joonghyuk straightened up to take a good look at his sunbae's response. He was surprised to see that the other had red eyes, as if he wanted to cry. His cheeks were a beautiful reddish colour. He felt his heart, which was already upset, begin to beat even more. He had done it, he had confessed.
“Y-you... How... Why? I didn't treat you very well at first and then I stopped talking to you without telling you anything, I'm not as handsome as you.... Why would you want someone like that?” He could feel that he was nervous.
Yoo Joonghyuk couldn't take it anymore and didn't let the older continue talking. He grabbed him by the waist to pull him closer, and then his lips subtly touched his sunbae's lips.
Kim Dokja let himself be guided by the other. He had never been kissed before, let alone thought he would ever like anyone. ‘Aah, that's why it didn't feel good to think that this hoobae would dump me.’
Now he was sure that he was attracted to Yoo Joonghyuk too. Not only did he like his beautiful face, but also his manner, which some would find annoying because he wasn't very communicative, but for someone like Kim Dokja, it was perfect.
After letting each other kiss, they finally let him go, but he wanted to keep kissing Yoo Joonghyuk. With his hands, he cupped his hoobae's cheeks, and kissed him too. But this time, it wasn't a tender kiss. Both of them had been holding back their desires for each other. By the time they broke apart again, their breaths were ragged and their hair was a mess.
“I want to take you to my house,” said Kim Dokja.
Yoo Joonghyuk seemed to have lost the ability to speak again because he just nodded energetically like a big dog. The elder laughed at how cute he found him.
Later, Yoo Joonghyuk would understand that accepting a proposal from Kim Dokja after being attacked with those kisses was not a good idea.
“You should have told me your mother would be here.”
“Where else would she be?”
Yoo Joonghyuk felt cheated for some reason.
Kim Dokja just laughed because his hoobae had simply followed him like a puppy to his house without asking anything else. The older boy was enjoying the moment.
Kim Dokja's mum had treated Yoo Joonghyuk with some suspicion at the beginning and filled him with questions about her son, it was as if she didn't trust him. However, after a while, the woman began to treat him better and told him that she was glad to know that her son had someone to bring home.
That day was one of the best birthdays for Kim Dokja.
He got a present and a nice boyfriend.