Chapter Text
“I’m sorry, Zeke. I like Erwin.” Levi smiled.
If only Zeke’s heart weren’t shattered, he would be on cloud 9. Levi smiling was something rare, something that needed to be treasured.
Despite being friends ever since they were toddlers, Zeke felt like his heart was about to explode whenever he saw Levi smile.
Back to the reality—his rejection, Zeke was 17, Levi was 18, and Erwin was the same age as the raven. Both of them were going off to college soon, together, to the same university. Stupid of Zeke to think that he could have a chance with Levi.
Zeke could not think clearly, his sight turned blurry when Levi reached out to hold his forearm. The shorter man knew that Zeke was seconds away from crying, he knew the blond was pretty sensitive and emotional.
Zeke turned his back.
“Don’t ever talk to me again, Lee. I hope you’re happy with Erwin.”
“Zeke, you’re being childish right no— ZEKE!”
Zeke ran, tears rolling down his cheeks as he ignored who had boxes around his feet. They were both in the midst of helping Levi pack up his stuff before Zeke decided to verbalize his repressed emotions to the raven, thinking that the latter would at least consider dating Zeke.
What did he expect? Of course, Levi would prefer Erwin.
Erwin was also Zeke’s close friend. They met at a book club meeting, so they decided to go to the meeting together every week. In spite of the regular meeting he had with Erwin, Zeke could hardly feel connected with that man.
Erwin was the embodiment of perfection, great looks, excellent grades, and a circle of friends who are not nerds. Zeke always felt like he was a background character in Erwin’s life, a cameo who happened to have a crush on the main character’s love interest.
Erwin and Levi belong to where the cool people sat at the school’s canteen. Many people belong there, but not Zeke, though he always sat there per Levi and Erwin’s request. He could not join most of the conversations, he physically could not.
Fortunately, the table has Hange, the only person Zeke could converse with. Hange and Zeke shared the same interest in science, and Hange happened to be Erwin’s childhood friend who was a year below the blond, exactly like Levi and Zeke.
Back to today, Zeke told Carla to never tell Levi about him ever again, knowing Kenny and Uri are close with the Yeagers. The woman only smiled at her son since Zeke excitedly told her about his plan that morning. But, it was the same smile Levi gave him earlier that day, and Zeke hated it. He hated pity even though he knew he looked pathetic.
Levi: ‘ how could you leave me like that you monkey!?’
Levi: ‘you promised to help me!’
Levi: ‘we can talk about this you know!’
Levi: ‘zeke?
Levi: ‘i know ur home shithead answer my fucking call’
Levi: ‘zeke we’ve been best friends for my whole fucking life i can’t lose you just like that’
Levi: ‘stop reading and start replying you illiterate bitch’
Levi: ‘zeke god fucking dammit i didn’t know ur this childish’
Levi: ‘well fuck you’
Zeke could only stare at his phone, he knew Levi could see that he was reading all these texts. Zeke was indeed childish, he was aware of that, but he was hopeful too.
How could he not?
Levi hated people, including Zeke, at first.
As time went by, Zeke was the only person that could touch Levi without getting the smaller man angry. Zeke was clingy, and Levi was fine with it.
Zeke got even more hopeful once Levi smiled when the blond kissed his cheek on Christmas, Levi’s 16th birthday 2 years ago.
Zeke’s eyes widened at the shade of pink coloring Levi’s pale cheeks. He prayed to God for the first time that night.
I will marry Levi.
[BLOCKED]
That was what he read. Levi could no longer contact him by that.
It was the first time they fought. Sure, they bickered once or twice before, and they had the weirdest dynamic of all time. Neither were the Yeagers and Ackermans would think that Levi and Zeke would be inseparable.
From the outsider’s perspective, Levi was a quiet kid, while Zeke would blabber about anything. They got along way too well with such dynamics. Even a 5-year-old Levi would always ask for Zeke’s whereabouts first every time he woke up from his nap and would wail when he found out that the blond was already taken home.
They were inseparable until Zeke decided otherwise.
Zeke could not handle heartbreaks well.
Yes, plural, and it all revolved around Levi.
The first heartbreak was when he found out Levi made cookies on Valentine’s Day for Erwin and gave a store-bought cheesecake for Zeke.
He then ignored Levi for a week at school but still hung out with Erwin at the book club. This also made Levi fumed at Zeke, so both of them kind of ignored each other for 2 whole weeks.
The second heartbreak was when Levi called him dramatic. Well, the raven was not wrong for that remark, because Zeke saw every dispute he had with Levi as heartbreak, and so on.
Today, Zeke had enough.
Today, Zeke wanted to accept the fact that Levi’s heart did not belong to him.
Today, Zeke would prove to Levi that he was not as childish as the raven perceived him to be.
He let out a sob.
“Aw, my baby.” Carla came into his room, with a plate of sliced apples in her hand. She sat beside her stepson before engulfing him in a hug, the plate was already put safely on the nightstand.
“It… it has been years, mama.” He snuggled into the crook of Carla’s neck despite him being taller and bigger than her.
Carla nodded, he knew about Levi and Zeke’s relationship because Kuchel kept updating her about its development. Levi talked about Zeke a lot to his mom, to Carla too.
Both moms were so happy with their sons’ relationship, but they also understood each other once Kuchel told Carla that Levi started bringing Erwin to their apartment. Carla knew how standoffish Levi was, so knowing that Erwin frequented Levi’s home just as much as Zeke, Carla only looked at her son whose eyes beamed whenever he met Levi. She felt brokenhearted long before her son.
Kuchel apologized to Carla that night through her phone call. Even though she was not in the room, Kuchel heard the confession and the dispute that followed.
“No need to apologize, Kuchel. It was out of our control.” Carla spoke softly, earning a chuckle from Kuchel.
“I know, I just thought… you know,” Kuchel sighed, “I just hate seeing Zeke sad, he is like my own son you know.”
Carla hummed, “it was all out of our control, and it is okay. They are both growing up, and I know these brats will be fine next week or something.” She glanced at Zeke’s bedroom door, where the blond was napping.
“You’re right. Even though he refuses to admit it, Levi is kinda clingy with your puppy.”
Both giggled at that.
“So… please don’t worry about anything, okay, Kuchel? Your son didn’t do anything wrong, besides… I love Levi way too much to be mad at him.”
“Yeah, thank you though, but please tell Mikasa to be home in an hour to help me pack.”
“Will do, and I’m sorry I can’t help you now.”
“It’s fine! Just take care of Eren, Carla. Hope he gets well soon.”
“Thank you, Kuchel. Talk to you soon!”
“Talk to you soon.”
Carla sighed before a small smile appeared on her face as she heard small footsteps coming in her direction, a soft voice followed.
“Was that Kuchel?”
“Yes, Mikasa. You want some snacks?”
The little girl shook her head, uttering a small ‘ no, thank you ,” before she walked towards the door. Mikasa had been sitting in front of Eren’s bedroom since the little boy was in a high fever and the girl, as usual, was feeling protective. Carla always smiled at Mikasa and patted her head every time the mother put bowls of snacks and fruits in front of Mikasa.
The Yeagers’ house was like the second home for the Ackermans, and vice versa. Carla just hoped what happened between Levi and Zeke would never occur to Eren and Mikasa, she could not bear seeing more heartbreaks from her children.
“Zeke blocked me, mom! That fucking shithead!”
“Levi Ackerman, watch your language!”
Levi only mumbled an apology before Kuchel sighed, “let Zeke alone for a while, okay? I am sure he will be fine by tomorrow.”
He could only look down to his feet. Levi would be off to his dorm tomorrow, the dorm he would share with Erwin. He was beyond ecstatic with the thought, he liked Erwin.
He was certain with his feelings towards Erwin, but the thought of losing Zeke was clouding his mind, his eyes started to hurt.
“Oh, baby…” He could not hear anything aside from Kuchel making her way to Levi, pulling him into her embrace. She hugged him tight as he silently cried in her arms.
Kuchel swayed her body sideways with Levi’s cheek resting on her shoulder. They were standing in the kitchen since Kuchel was still in the middle of making them lunch when Levi stormed in.
She shushed and caressed Levi’s hair as if he was still a kid, he would always be a baby to Kuchel’s eyes.
They stayed in each other’s arms before they both heard a small voice in the living room.
“I’m home.”
With that, Levi lifted his head and wiped all his tears, taking another deep breath.
He did not want Mikasa to see him crying over trivial matters. She was 4 years old when her parents passed away due to a severe car accident. A 10-year-old Levi vowed to protect her at all costs. Since then, he would always put up the facade of a strong older brother in front of her.
“Levi…” the 12-year-old called, her footsteps were so soft to the point that sometimes she would scare people with her sudden presence.
“Yes, Mika?” Levi walked to the living room to help the little girl put her dearest scarf on the coat rack.
“Are you fighting with Zeke again? He was crying when he got home.”
“N–” “oh, you’re crying too!”
“Mikasa, go help Levi with his boxes, would you?” Kuchel chimed in, earning a nod from the girl.
Once they were in Levi’s room, he sat on the bed as the little girl stood in the middle of the room, her eyes moving around the boxes.
“Mika, are you sure that Zeke was crying?”
She only hummed, eyes still everywhere but Levi, he knew she was observing which stuff she could help him with.
“I’m done packing, actually… I’m not gonna bring that much stuff anyway. How’s Eren?”
The little girl perked up and immediately took a seat beside Levi. To say that Levi knew Mikasa well would be an understatement and vice versa. Both of them were known to be very observant–both know how to get each other’s attention the best.
He smiled when he saw dust of pink coloring Mikasa’s cheeks.
“I didn’t meet him because Carla didn’t let me.”
“Of course, Mika. Eren is sick, and she didn’t want you to catch his germs.”
“I know,” she pouted, gaze moving downwards to her small hands, “I just miss him.”
Levi patted her head, putting her hair behind her ear before he pinched her cheek softly. God, he loves her so much.
“How’s Zeke though? Was he really crying?”
Mikasa nodded and lifted her head to meet Levi’s eyes, “he seemed so sad and angry, Levi, what did you do to him?”
His small smile faltered. Zeke may be emotional, but Levi could count with one hand on how many times Zeke had gotten angry over something.
“I talked to Carla before I went home. She told me that Zeke wasn’t angry at anyone… he was just mad at himself. What does that mean?”
Levi gasped softly, he knew the blond would start blaming himself, questioning his self-worth, and drowning in another self-loath. His heart ached at the thought.
“People do that sometimes, Mika. It’s mostly because of stress that people can’t think clearly and let their emotions overtake them,” Levi brushed Mikasa’s hair with his thin fingers as he continued, “that’s why you have to take deep breaths whenever you’re angry, do anything that can calm yourself first… okay, Mika?”
She hummed, eyes staring at the framed photo on Levi’s nightstand. It was a photo of Levi’s first cheerleading competition, he was holding a gold medal, smiling brightly at the camera. There was Kuchel and a smiling 8-year-old Mikasa carried in his arms. He was smiling because of the man behind the camera, Zeke.
“Levi! Mikasa! Lunchtime!” Kuchel yelled from the kitchen. Mikasa ran towards Kuchel’s voice immediately.
DING
His phone lit up. Levi immediately took the device that he threw to the bed, and it had been lying there ever since. Maybe Zeke had already come to his senses.
Erwin: ‘Do you want to go for some ice cream sandwiches? :)’
Levi bit his lip, he felt like he needed to check on Zeke first, but he also thought Kuchel was right. Zeke needed some time alone.
Levi: ‘ok. pick me up in an hour ’
One hour went by in a blink of an eye. Levi was doing the dishes after insisting Kuchel get some rest. He felt much better after the mother informed him that Carla texted her about Zeke’s situation. Apparently, the blond had come out of his room, still frowning, but no longer crying. Levi made a mental note to visit him after the ice cream run with Erwin later.
Just as he dried the last plate, Levi heard some soft knocks on his door. It was probably Erwin.
Levi dried his hands and made his way to open the door.
“Ervy, can you come in for a bit? I haven’t changed y–”
“Levi.”
“Zeke!?”