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Zoro knew how cruel life was ever since he was a kid.
His mom always told him he was a naturally curious kid, always shoving his hands in random pots and peeking through cracks to find new things.
He was 4 when he witnessed a butterfly land on a flower, its prussian blue wings fluttering in the wind. Zoro admired it, inching forward to get a closer look. He was in awe as he watched its wings stretch, revealing an intricate pattern printed on its backside. Not even 5 minutes later, it was trampled over by the other kids in the playground.
That was the first time Zoro witnessed how delicate life was, how easy it was to lose. He saw how brutal life was when you were something small, easily stepped on.
That was the first time however it wasn’t the last.
Zoro learned the cruelty of life at a young age however he realized the beauty that came with it too.
He was 8 when he met his best friend Sanji.
It was a hot June afternoon, the sun streaking down on them angrily. Zoro sat on the swing set alone, a bored sigh escaping his lips. His mom kicked him out of the house because he was spending too much time on his console. That led to him angrily trudging to the nearby park. He had 20 dollars in his shoes for ice cream but he wasn’t in the mood to go alone.
As the boredom ate at him, he suddenly heard a faint yelp of pain. He turned to the source of the sound, spotting a bunch of big kids ganging up on one boy that looked about his age. At that moment, his brain threw him back to his memory of the pretty butterfly from the playground, stepped on and killed by the humans who thought nothing of its life.
Of course Zoro wouldn’t be Zoro if he didn’t interfere, so he jumped off the swing and grabbed a stick from the ground before charging towards the group.
He mustered the bravest look he could and took a deep breath. “Hey, what are you doing to my friend?”
Zoro was a tall kid for his age, so he towered menacingly over the bullies. The kids turned to look at him and the deadpan look on Zoro’s face was enough to strike some nervousness into them.
“I asked a question.” Zoro sneered, squaring his shoulders. “What are you doing to my friend?”
“We were just playing. Right, Sanji?” One of them replied.
Zoro looked down at the blonde kid, Sanji. “That’s not what it looked like to me.” Zoro says. “Leave him alone or else.”
The group stared at him before one stepped forward with a raised brow. “Or else what?”
Zoro levelled him with a look, brain whirring as he thought of a threat. A smirk appeared on his lips as he extended the stick he was holding towards them. “Or else I’ll shove this stick up your nose.”
Everyone looked at him incredulously. Zoro wasn’t really pacifistic but Kuina’s father told him it was better to talk things out with people rather than turn to violence. But seeing the current situation, he knew desperate times call for desperate measures and jumping into action was what his impulsive 8 year old brain screamed at him to do.
“You won’t do it. You’re too scared to do it. You’re all talk.” One of the kids stepped forward with an accusatory look.
Zoro shrugged. “I’m 5 seconds away from doing it. 5, 4, 3…” He snapped the stick and moved forward with each count, the other kids backing away before eventually running away. Zoro cackled as he watched them run, some of them tripping over the curb.
He turned to look at Sanji, the brave facade fading away along with the remains of the adrenaline. Zoro crouched in front of him and observed his face, spotting a gash on his right cheek. “It's just a scratch, it won’t scar.” He said as he pulled the 20 dollar bill from the seam of his chucks.
He turned to Sanji. “Wanna get ice cream?”
Sanji just looked at him with a dumbfounded look before reluctantly agreeing. He let the taller kid with weird green hair pull him to the nearest convenience store to buy all the ice cream they wanted.
Zoro was 10 when he was faced with another question about life and its fairness.
It was the day of his favorite aunt’s wedding. She was the aunt that gave him new games for his console and babysat him and Sanji whenever their parents were busy. She gave them ice cream for dinner and baked the yummiest cookies. She told them the best bedtime stories with that oddly calming voice of hers.
His aunt Robin was one of the nicest people he knew and one of the prettiest in the world. She donned the most beautiful dress Zoro had ever seen, the white tulle glittering under the soft sunlight as she walked down the aisle. He turned to Sanji with a bright grin. “She’s so pretty, right?” He whispers.
Sanji returns the smile, albeit more reserved and shy. “Yeah, she is.” He whispers in response.
Zoro’s grin brightened as he returned his gaze to the altar, only to see the groom walk down the steps and down the aisle. He watched as crystalline tears streaked down her flushed cheeks, still looking beautiful as ever.
Zoro sat there in confusion, wondering why she was left behind. He turned to Sanji, his friend sporting the same look of confusion.
The moment of silence was broken by his mom who walked to the altar, pulling his aunt up and into the backroom.
Everyone cleared out after and Zoro stayed behind, waiting for everyone to leave. Once the venue cleared out, he walked towards the altar and picked up the discarded bouquet on the floor.
At age 10, Zoro was faced with the question: why do the most beautiful have to suffer the most?
He sat in the gazebo with Sanji, both of them staring at the pristine garden of rose bushes. “Why do the most beautiful have to suffer the most?” Zoro voices absentmindedly, one hand fiddling with his aunt’s bouquet while the other was clasped in Sanji’s.
Sanji turned to him with a contemplative look. “I saw this on the internet.” He says after a beat of silence.
Zoro turned to his best friend. “You’re not allowed to go on the internet. Your mom banned us when she saw what we searched.”
Sanji’s cheeks flared red. “We promised not to speak of it.” He said pointedly. Zoro just snorted. “Fine. Continue.”
Sanji rolled his eyes before continuing. “When you're in a garden, which flowers do you pick?” He asks, eyeing the bouquet that Zoro was holding.
Zoro thought about it before replying. “The most beautiful ones, of course.”
Sanji hummed, a pleased smile tugging on his lips. “There’s your answer.”
Zoro looked at the bouquet. The flowers were slowly losing its life, wilting and bending. “So life chooses to make things purposefully harder for the prettier things? Prettier people?”
Sanji shrugged. “Maybe.”
A pout settled on Zoro’s lips as the minutes passed. The 10 year old dropped the flowers beside him and grabbed Sanji’s shoulders. Sanji gave him a startled look as Zoro stared at his face. “You’re very pretty. That means life is going to be extra mean to you.” He whispers, eyes turning glassy.
Sanji sat there stunned, unable to form words at the sudden conclusion his best friend made. “What?”
Zoro ignored him, raking his eyes over Sanji’s face before wrapping him in a tight hug. “I’ll always be here to protect you from life. I’ll protect you like I did when we first met.” He says, voice muffled by Sanji’s shoulder.
The blonde kid wasn’t sure how to respond, a smile appearing on his lips as he returned the hug. “I’ll also be here to protect you from life’s mean attempts to make you sad.”
Zoro pulled away, keeping him at arm's length. His bottom lip wobbled as tears gathered in the corners of his eyes. “Promise?”
Sanji laughed. “Promise.”
Just like they promised, the pair stayed beside each other for the following years.
They spent most of the time together. Be it walking to school or playing on Zoro’s console in his room. After classes, they would sit in their respective swings at the park where they first met. Sometimes Sanji would bring his skateboard, something he picked up over the past months, and he would teach Zoro. That usually ended up with Zoro face planting into the pavement and he would go home with the Hello Kitty bandaids he reserved for Sanji on his face.
During their birthdays, they would go to the gazebo in the middle of the rose garden and they would sit there admiring the groomed rose bushes that stretched over the expanse of the land.
Either way, they never left each other’s side unless necessary.
Zoro witnessed every single breakdown Sanji experienced. He was there to soothe Sanji’s nerves. Zoro held his hand when he felt like the walls began to collapse and he could no longer breathe, vision obscured by the tears gathering in his eyes. He was always waiting for Sanji, always patient and always ready. Always ready to give him a cartoon character band aid whenever he fell from his board. When times were rough, Sanji knew Zoro would be there to wrap him in a hug that felt so much like home, so warm and so safe.
Likewise, Sanji was there when Kuina, Zoro’s childhood friend, died. He helped the other teen out of the destructive cycle he immersed himself in, reminding him to rest every time he went to train because he couldn’t be the best if he dies of exhaustion, right? Sanji was the one that caught Zoro when he finally collapsed from dehydration and severe fatigue and they had to rush him to the nearest hospital. Sanji was there to whisper reassurances into his ear when Zoro’s thoughts were too loud, too mean and too present.
They were together when they got their first piercings, experienced their first bouts of questioning their sexualities and experienced their first heartbreaks.
For the longest time, they were each other’s anchors. They grounded each other, pulling one another from the holes they dug. It was the same routine for the next 8 years. They met at a playground when they were 8 and all of a sudden, they were 18 and on the rooftop of a graduation party.
They currently sat on the rooftop of Luffy’s house, both holding red cups with spiked punch in it. The night was particularly cold and they were standing next to each other, sitting on the ledge as they overlooked the bright city lights. The faint sound of music could be heard even up here, screams from the partygoers reaching their ears.
An amused chuckle left Zoro’s lips as he took a sip of his punch. “Ace’s parties are as wild as ever.” He comments.
Sanji turned to him. “And why aren’t you down there? That’s your scene. This is the final party of high school. Didn’t you say you wanted to have at least one hook up before stepping into college?”
Zoro stuck his tongue out at him. “Can’t I spend my lovely night with my pretty best friend?”
“Hm, I knew you became friends with me cause I was pretty.” Sanji teases.
Zoro hummed, swirling his cup carelessly. “Not completely wrong but not completely true either.”
“Hm. Elaborate. You never told me why you decided to help me that day. What possessed tiny 8 year old Roronoa Zoro to come to scrawny Vinsmoke Sanji’s rescue with a stick and false bravado?” The blonde asked.
Zoro paused, recalling the memories from that day. “When I was 4, I saw a butterfly get trampled over by a bunch of careless kids.” He starts, staring into the translucent red liquid in his cup. “At age 4, I realized that life was cruel and it was rarely kind.”
Sanji stood on the side, eyeing Zoro through his peripheral vision. The other teen’s side profile was immaculate, ethereally lit by the bright billboard beside the building.
“When I saw you getting ganged up on by those stupid kids, I was thrown back to my memory of the butterfly. At that moment I was given a chance to save something beautiful. I didn’t know anything when I was younger. When I was 8, it was just an impulsive action.” Zoro chuckled. “But now that I think about it, I’m pretty sure that witnessing that butterfly’s death triggered my obsession with anything aesthetically pleasing.”
A smile appeared on Sanji’s lips. “That day in the rose garden. Was that you having an epiphany? That beautiful people, beautiful things, experience some of the worst fates in life?”
Zoro laughed, the memory flashing before his eyes like a 90s film. “Yeah, I guess it was an epiphany.”
A comfortable silence settled between them before Sanji broke it. “You did well on your promise, you know?”
Zoro turned to him with a raised brow. “Promise?”
“Your promise that you would protect me from life.” Sanji teased with a grin.
Zoro groaned. “I was 10.”
The grin on Sanji’s lips eased into a small smile. “But you never broke it though.”
“Never?” Zoro asks with a raised brow.
“Never.”
“Well, you never broke your promise either.” Zoro replies as he gulps the last of his punch.
“I’m glad we both grew up without breaking any promises then.” Sanji says lightly.
Zoro nodded. “Yeah.”
Things were easy and happy. For once, they weren’t faced with any of life’s ugliness.
But Zoro knew better than to be complacent with the way life was going. He wasn’t pessimistic. He liked to think that he was a realist and that for every happy moment people experienced, life was going to ask for an equally sad moment in return.
Just to his expectations, not even 2 weeks later, his parents sat him down in the living room and explained that they had to move to Australia for work purposes.
Zoro protested, claiming he was on the way to adulthood and that he could study in Japan without them.
They argued for hours on end, both sides trying to gain an upper hand until Zoro caved in and was unable to retaliate.
Zoro was a realist but he knew that he shouldn't ruin his time left with Sanji by burdening him with a time limit. So he kept the news of him moving to himself.
Zoro discreetly filled Sanji’s days with activities that they would do together, spending some of their last days with blissful memories.
On their 2nd to the last day together, Sanji caught on to Zoro’s odd behavior. “You're acting like we’re going to be miles apart. We’re only going to different colleges. It's not like you’re moving to some other country, right?” The teen says with a laugh.
Zoro paused, grip tightening on his phone. Sanji paused too, sending a weird look at his best friend. “Right?” He repeated.
It was time to tell him, Zoro thought.
He took a deep breath and walked towards Sanji. “Let's walk to the park?” Zoro extended his arm towards him.
Sanji’s eyes narrowed before wordlessly walking forward, taking Zoro's hand.
They walked to the park that was 5 minutes away, the silence irking Sanji. Zoro’s mind was going into overdrive as they walked, looking for a way to properly tell his friend that he was moving to a different continent.
Upon arriving at the park, they sat on their usual swing set. They lightly swayed with the wind as the sun set in the horizon, hands still intertwined. “What’s wrong? Is there something you’re not telling me?” Sanji asks quietly. It was a huge difference from his boisterous outbursts and bright way of talking. He knew that something was up and Zoro wasn’t telling him.
Zoro sighed, opting to just say it outright. “I… I’m moving to Australia soon.” He said quietly.
The breeze rustled the trees around them, a chill running up Zoro’s spine. He looked at his childhood friend, a blank look plastered on Sanji’s face.
“Are you serious?” Sanji whispers after a minute of silence. It was unusual to hear his friend so unsure of himself. It took time for the blonde to build his confidence up but when he did, it was established and unshakable. To see him in such a vulnerable state set Zoro on edge, a sinking feeling settling in his stomach.
“Yeah.” He replied, gaze downturned. He couldn't look at Sanji. He couldn't look at his tear filled eyes and sad gaze. Zoro’s heart pinched. He witnessed the worst times of Sanji, witnessed all his breakdowns and tear filled nights. However he was never the reason for those tears, which made this all the more painful.
“Why didn’t you tell me earlier?” Sanji asked, voice cracking.
“Because I didn’t want you to be pressured by time, Ji.” Zoro mustered all his courage and looked into his friend’s eyes, clutching his hands. “I couldn’t do that to you.”
“But at least I would have prepared myself for it.” Sanji replied.
Zoro paused and sighed, realizing that he was right. “I’m sorry, Sanji. I… I really am.”
“This won’t change anything between us, right? You’ll still call? You’ll always be there?” Sanji asked.
The green haired teen smiled and nodded, grip tightening around his bestfriend’s hands. “Of course. I’ll call you everyday like clockwork. This won’t change anything. Promise.”
Sanji pulled his hands from his grip and raised his pinky. “Pinky promise?”
Zoro hooked his pinky with Sanji’s. “Pinky promise.”
Sanji smiled and Zoro felt his heart rise a little.
Zoro left for Australia.
Sanji was left behind clutching a hoodie drenched in the marimo’s signature perfume, tears slowly streaming down his cheeks as his parents drove them home from the airport.
It was odd to be separated from Zoro. They were always stuck at the hip since they met, so having to be continents apart was quite difficult for Sanji to handle.
It didn’t help that he already missed the way Zoro smiled softly, not a smirk— a real smile that was reserved just for him. He also missed the way his arms wrapped around his shoulders tightly and the way the other teen would whisper soft nothings in that irritating smooth baritone voice of his.
There were a lot of regrets that plagued Sanji’s mind, however the biggest one was definitely the fact that he wasn't able to tell Zoro how he truly felt about him.
He had been hosting these feelings for his bestfriend since he turned 14, sitting on the swingset, eating ice lollies.
It was a rather quick realization, one he wasn’t even surprised about. Sanji knew that he always had feelings for the other boy, it was just admitting it that made it more difficult to think of.
Now that the teen was on the plane to another continent, only then did Sanji finally muster the guts to tell him about his feelings. Or so he thought.
He got home and just cried, clutching the hoodie close to him, all thoughts of ever confessing disappearing from his mind as he fell into Morpheus’ arms.
It would be a full blown lie to say things didn’t change between them. Oh, they definitely did. However not so much that it bothered the pair.
They talked on the phone weekly so they could pile up the stories they wanted to tell and tell it all in one go. They chatted sometimes but both their college workloads were heavy and there was barely any time for them to spare for one another.
Although they never missed their scheduled weekly calls, it was like a rift was already beginning to form between them. Well, at least that’s what Sanji felt.
Maybe it was because he was so used to having Zoro around that not having him in close proximity already felt difficult to deal with. What bothered him even more was that Zoro didn’t even look affected. Not one bit.
It hurt, of course. But Sanji tried not to let it show.
He had other friends like Luffy, Usopp and Nami… But they weren’t Zoro.
They weren’t the ones Sanji could trust to have his back no matter what. They weren’t the one that coaxed him through the numerous panic attacks that seemed to hit whenever they felt like it.
They were good, amazing friends but they weren’t his bestfriend. They weren’t Zoro.
Said bestfriend was currently traipsing in Australia with a bunch of other people, completely unbothered by the distance that was set between them and completely unaware of how distant Sanji was beginning to act.
It’s been roughly 5 months since the last time Zoro received a call from Sanji. He tried to call his old number but it seems he changed it. Not only that but his number was also blocked on his other friends’ and Sanji’s parents. Social media was also a bust. His friends from their hometown just say Sanji’s fine but it was iffy. It was like Sanji disappeared off the face of the earth.
It hurt to be cast out like this but honestly speaking, maybe he should have expected it. He assumed it was Sanji’s parents doing this so their kid could have some peace of mind and move on from him leaving.
Maybe Sanji just blocked him. It was unlikely though, so Zoro erased that thought from his head.
All was going well for the most part. Until he received a phone call from an unknown number. It had a different area code, Japan’s to be precise.
A spark of hope flickered in Zoro’s chest, internally hoping it was Sanji.
He picked the call up. “Hello?” He answered hopefully.
There was no reply, just the sound of someone sobbing. “Hello?” Zoro repeated.
He was met with the sound of a choked sob followed by, “I’m so sorry.”
Then the call was dropped.
It was an odd phone call but Zoro didn’t let it bother him. He was a little disappointed it wasn’t Sanji but overall, he pushed the weird encounter to the back of his head and went on with life.
Zoro was finally permitted to come home for a while, after much debate and persuasion towards his parents. He was only allowed to stay for a few days but it was a big deal already, given how much he missed Sanji for the past 24 months.
As soon as he put his stuff down in his hotel room, he immediately hailed a cab and told them his former address.
A wide grin appeared on Zoro’s lips when the cab turned on the familiar bend of the road. Nostalgia hit him when they passed by the playground where they met and when the cab stopped in front of the familiar houses, Zoro just sighed,
He paid the driver and got out of the vehicle. He stood on the sidewalk for a while, just staring at his old house and Sanji’s. He looked up at the window of Sanji’s room. He could still see the dents on the wooden panels caused by his failed rock throwing attempts.
After a few seconds of reminiscing, Zoro walked to the front door and rang the doorbell.
He was expecting his bubbly bestfriend to answer the door but was instead greeted by his mom.
Sanji’s mom looked at him, surprised. “Zoro?” She whispered in disbelief, as though it were impossible for him to be standing before her right now.
“Hello auntie, it's been a while.” Zoro smiled pleasantly.
“Yes it’s been a while indeed.” She replied… Rather sadly? “Come in.”
She opened the door wider and walked in, allowing Zoro entry into the house. “Make yourself at home, Zoro.” She told him before walking up the stairs, probably to call Sanji.
Zoro did as told and sat down on the loveseat, spotting Zeff as he walked down the stairs. “Hello uncle.” He greeted the man.
A pained look crossed over the man’s face before it got replaced by a melancholic smile. “Hello Zoro.” Zeff said and took a seat across from him.
Zoro looked around the room with a faint smile. "So where's Sanji?" He asks.
Zeff’s smile fell. "Huh? Oh right. We didn't tell you."
It wasn't a question. It was a statement.
Zoro chuckled nervously. "Didn’t tell me what exactly?"
Sanji’s dad sent him a sad smile. "You’ve grown quite a bit, Zoro. You're no longer that small 8 year old that Sanji cooked for until you got into a food coma."
Zoro smiled fondly at the memory. It was distant, faint, but intact. He could still remember the look on Sanji’s face, the tears streaking his chubby cheeks as he hovered over Zoro.
"I thought I killed you!" Sanji wailed, hugging Zoro tightly. He looked at his parents with a confused look on his face, both his mom and dad sporting amused smiles.
“Yeah. we both grew up.” Zoro says softly.
Sanji’s mom came down a few minutes later, Sanji’s old weathered skateboard in her hands. She shakily handed it to Zoro, a tear sliding down her cheek. She wiped it away and mustered a small smile.
“I know it’s unfair to you, Zoro and I'm so sorry for not telling you… But Sanji died 2 years ago ." She said, a sob following her words.
A second passed and Zoro felt all the air get knocked out of his lungs. The same sentence kept replaying in his head, time slowing down as though it were mocking him.
"Sanji died 2 years ago?" He whispered in disbelief.
He shook his head, tears of denial gathering in his eyes. He furiously wiped them away with the back of his hand. "He can't. He didn't. Luffy told me he was doing okay! He promised he would wait. He promised he would... he promised…" He would protect me from life. Zoro’s mind continued.
Sanji’s parents looked at him sadly. "It was a hit and run. He was going home from school and it was unexpected. We think he tried calling someone because his phone was connected to a call before it died.”
Zoro racked his brain for anything that happened 2 years ago, anything unusual and all of a sudden, it clicked. There was that day an unknown number from Japan called him out of the blue. He realized that the one sobbing on the phone was Sanji. The one apologizing was Sanji.
"We’re sorry, Zoro.”
He flipped the skateboard and took a good look at it. He could still see Sanji’s initials on the underside written in sharpie along with his signature and a sword drawn next to it.
“Why didn't you tell me?” He asked, trying to keep his voice leveled.
“He told us not to tell you until you came back to Japan for good. It was the last thing he told us.” She replied tearfully.
In all honesty, Zoro wanted to be mad at Sanji’s parents for not telling him. He wanted to be mad at his own parents for forcing him to move to another country. He wanted to be mad at Sanji for breaking his promise.
He wanted someone to blame, someone to scream at. In the end, the only person he truly blamed was himself.
Zoro gripped the skateboard in his hand as he exited the house, his other arm holding the box of Sanji personal effects.
He felt absolutely drained, his mind finally silent. He decided to just go to the cemetery and get it over with. He had to see his bestfriend.
It was a short walk because everything in this small town was connected and everyone knew each other.
He walked down the grassy path, passing by the numerous gravestones erected on the ground.
He had an inkling feeling of where Sanji’s grave was so he kept walking deeper into the forest until he came across the gazebo they hung out in, the rose bushes still gorgeous as ever.
Lo and behold, a gravestone sat beside the gazebo. He walked closer and smiled. A name was etched on the smooth stone, a name that was also etched on his heart, soul and entire being. He traced the name, a tender smile appearing on his lips.
Vinsmoke Sanji
Beloved son and friend
19XX-20XX
“Hey. You weren’t at the airport.” Zoro said softly as he took a seat in front of the grave. “You promised you would meet me at the airport when I come home. You never break your promises but I guess there’s a first time for everything right?”
Zoro stared at the grave for a second before tears slowly gathered in the corner of his eyes. “It’s unfair, Sanji. It’s so unfair that you were taken just like that. I wasn’t there for you. I fucking hate what happened but more than that, I hate myself. Why wasn’t I there? I never should have left for Australia. I should have fought my mom. I should have told you how I felt before I left. I… I’ve missed you.” Zoro whispered. “And it appears I’ll miss you ‘til the end of time.”
Zoro had a lot of regrets in life but meeting Vinsmoke Sanji will never be one of them.