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“Lads!” James exclaimed, slamming his hands onto the Gryffindor table in the Great Hall.
All three of his friends - Remus, Sirius, and Peter - snapped their heads up from their breakfast to look at him questioningly.
“What?” Peter asked.
“Haven’t you looked at the notice board in the Common Room?” James said excitedly, taking a seat next to Peter.
Both Sirius and Peter frowned. Remus rolled his eyes.
“No, sorry,” he said. “We were too busy trying to not be late for breakfast. You’ve got five minutes left by the way.”
James shoved an entire piece of toast into his mouth as Remus said that.
“Who even looks at the notice board anyway?” Sirius asked. “Isn’t it all just extracurricular activities and other stuff for nerds?”
Remus rolled his eyes again.
James shook his head, his mouth still full. Then, he swallowed harshly and grimaced.
“That’s where they put up the Hogsmeade dates!” he exclaimed. “And there’s finally one!”
The December snowstorms had made it impossible for the Hogsmeade outing to happen as it usually did. Which was upsetting for the boys mostly because that was supposed to be their first time visiting the village.
Sirius felt his face fall. But no one was focusing on him.
Remus’ face, on the other hand, lightened up. “Really? When?”
“Next weekend,” James said with a grin. “Can you believe it? We’ll finally be able to visit Zonko’s!”
A lump grew in Sirius’ throat as the others continued to chatter excitedly about the field trip. He dropped his spoon into the bowl of cereal and sank into his chair.
Only Peter seemed to notice. He snapped his head to Sirius and frowned.
“Si, you okay?” he asked. Quietly.
Sirius shook his head. “Yeah, I— I think I must’ve eaten something bad. But I’ll be fine.”
He dragged himself around all day, sulking, and not engaging in any conversations about Hogsmeade. Whenever anyone asked him what was wrong, he blamed it on a stomachache.
“Merlin, Si, if it hurts so much just go to Madam Pomfrey!” an exasperated James exclaimed in the evening when they were all already in the dorm.
“He’s right Si,” Peter piped up. “You’re really not acting like yourself.”
Sirius was laying on his bed, staring at the ceiling. “I’ll be fine.”
He couldn’t go to Madam Pomfrey because there was no actual stomachache. And Madam Pomfrey would definitely see through his act.
But apparently, so did Remus Lupin.
“Oi!” he shouted and before Sirius could react, a pillow hit him in the face.
He sat up, astonished and looked to his right. Remus’ bed was right next to his. Sometimes he thought of it as the luckiest accident in the world but sometimes also as a curse.
“What the hell?” he exclaimed.
“What’s wrong?” Remus asked. Softly. “It’s clearly not a stomachache.”
Sirius swallowed and shook his head. “It’s nothing.”
James plopped down onto the bed next to him and knocked into his side. “Come on, Si. What’s up?”
“You can tell us,” Peter spoke up from the floor where he settled, looking up at the rest of the boys.
Sirius hesitated for a moment. But then he took a deep breath—
“I won’t go to Hogsmeade with you.”
There was a beat of silence. Peter was staring up at Sirius, his mouth agape.
“Wa— Wait, what?” James stammered.
“Why?” Remus asked.
Something told Sirius that all of them already knew the answer to that question. But he replied anyway, his gaze wandering away:
“My parents, they—” He paused. His fingers were fiddling with a loose thread of his sweater. He was practically shaking. “They— They said they wouldn’t sign the permission slip.”
He was pulling at the thread almost aggressively and wrapping it tightly around his fingers.
“Oh, Si…” James let out. “I— I’m sure we can think of something, we have the Cloak after all—”
“No,” Sirius cut him off, his voice practically teary. He still wasn’t looking at his friends. “No, I don’t wanna do it like that. If my parents find out I went against their orders and the school rules, I—” He shook his head, tears welling up in his eyes. “I don’t wanna know what will happen.”
No one said anything. This was so uncomfortable, Sirius had made them uncomfortable, why would he—
Someone sat on his other side. Sirius registered the signature warm scent and the brown sweater immediately.
Remus took Sirius’ hand, pulling it away from the thread.
Sirius lifted his chin, a bit shyly, tears dripping down his cheeks. Remus smiled at him warmly.
Then, Sirius released a breath, and lolled forward, his forehead resting on Remus’ shoulder.
“We’ll figure it out,” Remus said.
Two days later, all four of them had stayed behind after Transfiguration. Professor McGonagall who was sitting at her desk narrowed her eyes at them as they stood in a small circle in the middle of the classroom, shouting at each other in hushed voices.
“What kind of mischief are you four up to?” she asked.
They all snapped their heads up to her and stared, mildly shocked.
James was the first to shake it off. He cleared his throat. “Well, uh, Professor, Sirius has this— situation— ”
“Yes,” Sirius cut him off, stepping forward and taking the crumpled permission form out of his pocket. “I, um…”
McGonagall looked down at the paper in his hands. “Is that your Hogsmeade permission form? If you’ve forgotten to hand it in, that's fine, just give it to me now.”
“No, I— I mean—” Sirius tripped over his words, his gaze avoiding McGonagall’s eyes. “It is my form, it’s just—”
Suddenly, he felt a familiar warmth next to him as Remus stepped closer to McGonagall’s desk as well. Sirius glanced at him briefly to see his soft encouraging smile.
Sirius swallowed and looked at McGonagall. “My parents didn’t sign it.”
Something shifted in the way she was looking at him, for a split second something pitiful appeared in her eyes. But she quickly went back to her stern self.
“Well, in that case, Sirius, I’m afraid you won’t be allowed to go,” she said.
Sirius felt every last bit of hope flee his heart.
“Oh, come on, Minnie,” James spoke up again, as nonchalant as ever. “You know what his parents are like.”
McGonagall glared at him. “You have to realize you’re not helping by addressing me per ‘Minnie’, Mr Potter.”
James shrugged. “Alright. Professor, please . You know what Sirius’ parents are like.”
McGonagall looked at Sirius again and he’d never felt so small. So vulnerable. Not at school at least.
She stared at him for a moment before huffing out a breath and reaching out. “Alright, give it to me.”
Stunned, his eyes wide, Sirius handed her the paper.
She laid it out on her desk, grabbed her quill and in a swift motion signed her name in the spot for “parent’s or guardian’s signature.”
Once she finished, she looked up at the four of them. “Alright, off you go.”
They all began scattering out, Sirius walking backwards.
“I— I— Thank you,” he managed finally.
McGonagall rolled her eyes, somewhat fondly. “Just don’t tell anyone about this.”