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Elzar woke up knowing something was wrong. A discomforting feeling itched in the back of his mind, but he couldn’t pinpoint exactly where it came from.
He didn’t think it was due to anything wrong with him. It felt different from the anxiety of forgetting something important, or the inkling of immediate danger on field missions. This feeling was much less comprehensible. There wasn’t anything he could do to make it go away—no amount of calming exercises or micromeditations were proving helpful—so he got ready for the day, as he always did, before meeting his master in the meditation chamber.
“Follow that feeling, don’t run from it,” Master Quarry told him. “The Force is trying to tell you something.”
Elzar focused on the discomfort, trying to make sense of it. At first all he could feel was heat, and then the heat left and it was like a cold, isolating emptiness, took its place. As he pulled away, he saw fleeting images and flashes of color that he couldn’t quite discern. Master Quarry told him to meditate on the vision—though he was hesitant to call it that—and said that clarity might come with closer reflection.
But try as he might, he couldn’t find the reason, so he went to breakfast confused and irritated. He got his usual meal—a bowl of Anoat oats—and sat at his usual table, expecting to see the usual faces of his friends. As soon as Stellan sat down, however, Elzar realized immediately what was different.
“Where’s Avar?” Elzar asked, without saying hello.
A puzzled expression crossed Stellan’s face, and he shrugged. “Has she started a new course at the Conservatory?” he asked. “Maybe her schedule has changed.”
Elzar shook his head. “Her intro to music theory course doesn’t end for two more weeks,” he replied. “And it doesn’t meet on Tuesdays anyway.” Stellan didn’t question how he knew all of that.
“Maybe Master Maota had something for her to do today,” Stellan suggested.
Elzar nodded like he was listening but his mind was elsewhere. “Something is wrong though. I can feel it.” And with that, he set his tray down on the table and left.
It was only a few minutes before he was at her door. He knocked and waited, and receiving no reply he instead reached out with the Force, trying to determine whether she was inside or not. After a moment he detected her presence, but something about it felt different. Muted, almost. It made his head hurt, and worried him enough that he quickly entered her code and opened the door.
As he stepped through the doorway, he saw Avar still in bed with the covers pulled up to her chin. His eyes went wide. That wasn’t right. Avar didn’t sleep in.
“Avar,” he said, crossing the small space. His heart dropped into his stomach as he tried to assess what was wrong. “Avar!” he exclaimed more urgently, placing his hand on her shoulder to shake her awake.
Avar crinkled up her face as she rolled over to look at him. “El?” she asked, her voice sounding hoarse. “What are you doing here?” Her face was flushed and he could see beads of sweat around her hairline.
He sat tentatively on the edge of the bed, his hand flying to her forehead. She was burning up.
“I was worried about you,” he said, furrowing his brow in concern. “We need to get you to the med center.”
Avar shook her head gently. “I’m okay, Master Maota sent for a medical droid earlier. It’s just a respiratory virus—” she coughed a deep, hoarse cough, “but the droid gave me something for it. He said I’d probably still feel awful for a few hours but I should be better tomorrow.” She smiled weakly. “He also said I should sleep, which you interrupted.”
The frown didn’t leave Elzar’s face. He brushed the damp hair from Avar’s forehead. “What can I do?” he asked.
Avar shook her head. “I’m okay,” she replied. Elzar’s hand lingered on her forehead.
“Do you need water?”
Avar pointed to several bottles of water on her nightstand—part of the standard package provided by the medical droids. “I’m okay,” she said for the third time.
“No, you’re not,” he answered.
Avar closed her eyes and released a sigh. “Ice,” she said after a moment to think. “I could use some ice. For my head.”
Elzar nodded. “I’ll bring you some.”
“And maybe some tea,” she added. “With—”
“—honey, I know,” Elzar said with a smile as he stood. He’d done this before. Tea was one of the things that could reliably make Avar feel better, and Elzar had been determined as a youngling to learn how to make it. “Do you want it iced?”
Avar shook her head. “It’ll make my throat feel better if it’s warm, I think.”
Elzar nodded. “I can do that. I’ll be back.”
He made his way quickly back to the refectory, where Stellan was still finishing his breakfast.
“Everything okay?” he asked with a mouth full of food.
Elzar stopped his pace only long enough to shake his head and reply, “Avar is sick. I’m going to get her some tea.”
~*~
Avar felt like the world was swimming. Everything was simultaneously too hot and too cold. It felt like the hair on her arms and the back of her neck was standing on end, and the room was too bright, and everything hurt.
She’d gone to bed with a headache, feeling indistinguishably off, but she’d woken feeling like she had been hit by a speeder. Or better yet, a whole star cruiser.
A brief message to Master Maota had brought him down like a worried parent, followed quickly by a medical droid to assess her symptoms. Some strain of Hosnian Flu was the official diagnosis. It wasn’t anything truly serious—not with modern medical advancements, anyway—but it was a stubborn virus nonetheless. The medicine often resulted in the symptoms getting worse before they got better, but it could render the virus non-contagious in an hour and clear within a day in most species. She just had to wait, and sleep.
Avar didn’t know how much time had passed. Everything seemed fuzzy around the edges, except her throat which felt like it had been ripped to shreds by a hragscythe, and her head which pulsed like a steady drum.
Elzar’s hands on her forehead had been a welcome sensation, but she also didn’t want him to worry about her. She just wanted to sleep and for everything to feel better when she woke up. But she had been trying to sleep for ages; she had tried, as well, to immerse herself in the Force and get lost amidst the great cosmic consciousness, but everything felt like a blur, and the melody she usually heard was muted and far away.
She was vaguely aware of her door opening and closing, and then the sudden sensation of ice being applied directly to her forehead. Avar flinched at the drastic temperature shift.
“No, not like that,” another voice said. “You have to wrap it in something. Here—” The cold left as quickly as it had arrived, leaving behind a wet sensation. Who was that voice?
“Stell?” Avar asked. She squinted, trying to focus on the two figures who now stood in her room, arguing about something quietly.
The taller of the two approached. “Hey, how are you feeling?” he asked.
“Stellan, why are you here?” Avar asked. “I’m fine, really.” Her hacking cough betrayed her lie.
Stellan laughed. “I’m sure you are, but someone had to make sure that El ate breakfast.” He placed a bowl on the nightstand, which Avar assumed was Elzar’s usual bowl of oatmeal.
Avar smiled and exhaled a short laugh that turned into another cough lasting longer than the first. Stellan pressed one of the bottles of water into her hands and she accepted it gratefully.
“El, you’re not allowed to take care of me if you don’t take care of yourself,” Avar said finally as she laid back on the bed.
Elzar laughed. Avar felt a slow wave of relief as he held a cloth to her forehead and cold gradually seeped into her skin.
“Your tea is on the nightstand,” Elzar said, arranging the bundled ice cubes so that they balanced on her forehead without slipping.
Avar let her eyes drift close. She nodded faintly.
“Thank you,” she breathed. The fire within her seemed to lap hungrily at the edge of the coolness on her forehead, but the small amount of relief was enough for a moment.
~*~
Elzar hated seeing Avar in distress. Every time she coughed or spoke he knew it took an immense effort, and he could almost feel the pain in his own body.
Avar wasn’t someone who got sick very often, but Elzar remembered a handful of times when they were younglings that she’d been sick like this. He had learned to make tea for that very reason, not because he personally enjoyed the taste of leaves—which he didn’t—but because he wanted to do something that would help at a time when the only thing to do was wait.
As another coughing fit racked her body, Elzar held out the cup of tea. Avar tried to push herself up into a more seated position, and Elzar immediately reached to help pull the pillows up behind her for support.
He could sense her gratitude as the first sips of tea slid down her throat, soothing the raw, stabbing pain.
“They had the good Akavian honey today,” Elzar said as he watched a smile break across Avar’s face.
“I can tell,” she said contentedly. She took another few sips and passed the cup back to him before slipping back down under the covers. Elzar leaned over to help her pull the blankets back up.
“Thank you,” she murmured. “You don’t have to stay.”
Elzar let out an amused laugh. “I know,” he replied. “But I’m not going anywhere. Master Quarry told me that this is where I should be.”
Avar opened one eye. “Did he?” she asked incredulously.
“Well…” Elzar paused as he ran a hand through his hair. “He said I should follow the disturbance I felt in the Force. That led me here.”
Avar closed her eyes again and shook her head gently. “Half truths…” she joked. But she didn’t protest his company any more than that.
~*~
Avar fell into a fitful sort of sleep where she couldn’t get comfortable and the world seemed to swirl in chaotic circles around her. She hated that Elzar worried so much. She wished she could make him believe that she was alright. She wasn’t, of course, but she knew she would be. Soon. He didn’t need to hover.
Some part of her was glad he did, though.
When her eyes fluttered open again the heat she’d felt earlier was gone and all she felt was cold. It was the kind of cold that she couldn’t chase away by pulling the blankets tighter around her, and it made her teeth rattle and her bones ache. The only spot on her body that felt warm was her hand, and she realized that Elzar had taken it in his own.
“Avar?” he asked, squeezing her hand as a shiver ran through her body. He’d evidently been watching as the cold had overtaken her.
“Why is it so cold?” she asked. Elzar let go of her hand and reached for the tea, only to realize that it had sat long enough to have lost its heat.
“Hang on,” he said. Avar rolled over and watched as Elzar closed his eyes, cradling the cup in his hands. He had a look of complete concentration, and beads of sweat began to form on his brow.
“El…?” Avar asked.
Elzar released a breath and opened his eyes. He smiled as he handed her the cup.
“I think it worked,” he said with a grin.
Avar took the cup from his hands and felt it’s warmth seep into her palms. She held the cup close to her face, feeling the steam rising gently. She took a sip, and it soothed her throat and chased away the cold better than she expected.
“What did you do?” she asked.
“I used the Force to make the molecules move faster, just a little,” he said proudly. “It isn’t boiling, but it’s not cold anymore. You were asleep for close to two hours.”
“You’ve been here this whole time?” Avar asked.
“It’s fine, I have a project,” he replied, pointing to a datapad on the floor.
Another shiver overtook Avar and a little of the tea sloshed over the side onto her blanket. She took one more long sip hoping that it would feel like before, but the warmth was fleeting. Elzar stood from his place on the floor and sat on the edge of the bed.
“Here,” he said, wrapping an arm around her shoulders. He let his robe fall around her like another blanket. She leaned her head on his shoulder, and passed her cup back to him, which he placed on the nightstand once more. He felt so warm and comforting, Avar couldn’t help but wrap her arms around him and close her eyes.
“How are you so warm?” she murmured.
Elzar let out a small laugh. He kicked off his shoes and swung his legs up onto the bed too, pulling Avar as close as he could. She ended up half in his lap, her knees tucked up and resting on his thighs, and he pulled the blankets around them.
“I’ve got you,” he said softly, running his hands up and down her arms slowly.
~*~
Elzar held Avar in his arms as she drifted back to sleep. She looked so peaceful, and so small the way she had curled up with her knees close to her chest. Despite her shivers, he didn’t detect the same pain and discomfort that had been there before, and he hoped that meant the worst of the symptoms had passed.
He hadn’t seen Avar curled up like this since they were younglings, and the memory struck him like a bolt to the chest. He remembered when several of the younglings had gotten sick one day, and he had snuck into the kitchens to make her some tea. Seeing her look so miserable had hurt his heart just as much then as it did today. He had climbed up into the bed with her and wrapped his arms around her as if he could take away the hurt. Instead, he’d come down with the same fever the next morning. At least this time there wasn’t any danger of that.
Now he ran his fingers across her forehead and then down through her hair. She still felt warm, but not nearly as warm as she had before. He supposed that’s what accounted for her sudden shift.
His comm chimed and he saw a message from Stellan.
How is she? he asked.
Getting better, Elzar sent back.
And you? Stellan asked.
Elzar smiled. Never better, he replied. He would sit like this as long as he could.
~*~
Avar didn’t know how long she sat like that, basking in the warmth that radiated from Elzar like a sun, but when she woke again there was a pain in her neck.
Elzar hadn’t moved from the bed, but Avar realized that her head was in his lap. Avar turned to look up at him and saw him with his datapad in hand.
“You’re still here,” she mused.
Elzar looked down at her, setting aside his datapad quickly. His hand went to her forehead and he brightened. “I think the fever is gone. How do you feel?”
Avar nodded. “Better,” she replied. “Not one hundred percent; I can still feel it in my lungs and sinuses, but I don’t feel like I’m dying,” she said with a laugh. She coughed, though it was shallower than before.
“Can I bring you something to eat?” Elzar asked.
Avar shook her head. “I’m not hungry,” she replied. But after a moment she considered her words and asked, “Have you eaten?”
“I had something earlier,” Elzar said with a wave of his hand. Avar knew what that meant. She glanced at her chrono.
“It’s the middle of the afternoon and you haven’t eaten since breakfast,” she stated. He didn’t correct her. “Go get food. Bring me back some soup or something. I could probably handle that.” Avar knew that he probably wouldn’t leave if he didn’t have to bring something back for her. She hoped he’d pick something up for himself. She hated feeling like a burden.
Elzar nodded and slowly slid off the bed, easing her off his lap and back onto the pillows.
“I’ll be back in a bit,” he said as he left.
The world felt clearer now, and Avar realized that she really was hungry. She hadn’t eaten anything since the night before. Her stomach hurt from the hunger, but she wasn’t sure if she really wanted anything to eat. She just had to hope that Elzar would find something she could tolerate.
As she thought about it, she felt guilty that Elzar had spent hours taking care of her, but it really had helped to know that he was nearby. Of course she knew that Master Maota was only a holocom away, but Elzar’s presence was different.
She didn’t get much time to reflect on that, though, as a knock came softly at her door.
~*~
Elzar returned from the refectory feeling pretty satisfied in what he’d chosen. He had gotten a sandwich for himself, and they’d been serving Callosian spring vegetable soup which he thought Avar might like.
He punched in the code to the door and it hissed open to reveal the towering form of Cherff Maota.
Slightly startled, Elzar stood in the doorway for a moment. Master Maota turned and smiled, beckoning him in.
“Avar told me she was waiting on room service,” he joked.
“Vegetable soup,” Elzar said, holding up the takeaway container. “And bread too. I figured bread is always good even if your stomach doesn’t feel like food.”
Avar sat up a little taller in bed. It was evident from the brightness of her eyes and the color that had returned to her cheeks that she was feeling better than she had this morning.
“Thank you,” she said as Elzar set the food on the bedside table.
“I’ll leave you to your lunch,” Cherff said as he turned towards the door. “You can comm if anything changes,” he added, looking back at Avar. Avar nodded and Cherff left.
“I’m surprised he didn’t tell me that I didn’t have to be here,” Elzar said with a slightly relieved laugh.
Avar smiled and shook her head. “Actually, he was glad when I told him that you had spent the day with me.”
“Really?” Elzar lifted an incredulous eyebrow.
“Well…he said ‘no Jedi is ever truly alone, but it’s nice to be reminded of that.’”
Elzar huffed a short laugh. “Does that mean he likes me? I honestly can never tell.”
Avar nudged his shoulder playfully, shaking her head in mock disbelief. She never seemed to understand why Elzar felt intimidated by Master Maota, but between his towering form and his cryptic wisdom, Elzar never quite knew what to say around him. Avar always insisted that Cherff liked him, but Elzar thought that might have been wishful thinking on her part.
So instead of opening that discussion with Avar again, Elzar reached for his lunch.
“Thank you,” Avar said simply as Elzar took a bite of his sandwich.
“For what?” Elzar asked, his mouth full.
“For reminding me that I don’t have to suffer alone.” Avar met his eyes and for a moment Elzar swore he saw something more than gratitude there. But the moment passed just as quickly as it had come, and Avar leaned over to retrieve her bowl of soup from the nightstand.
“Always,” Elzar promised.