Work Text:
The sun shone through the glass windows of Ayato's office. He worked in a company as a manager and he was a hard-working man. The buzz of the morning peak hour could be heard as people rushed to their workplaces. Ayato clicked away at his computer as the other workers slowly filtered in. As Ayato sipped on his coffee, Yoimiya greeted Ayato and walked to her desk.
Before lunch, Ayato could feel his energy draining due to the all-nighter he pulled in the office the previous night. Even coffee couldn't help him. Finding himself getting tired by the second, he made up his mind to get a bottle of energy drink since he couldn't continue working in such a sleepy state.
Standing up made him feel dizzy and he quickly held onto the table to stabilize himself. Taking deeper breaths than usual, he dragged himself to the vending machine. Just as he was about to purchase an energy drink, several black spots danced around his vision. He lost his balance and leaned onto the vending machine for support. His body felt like it weighed a tonne as he wheezed. "So Tired..." Ayato breathed out, pushing himself up from the vending machine, he tried to quickly get back to work.
However, his body refused. He felt like he was on fire and his lungs felt constricted. As he was going to take a step, he stumbled over himself and was about to fall when two arms held onto his own.
"Careful there, Ayato. Are you okay?" Tomo, his saviour who is also his boss, asked in concern.
"B-Boss! I'm okay..." Ayato pulled himself off his boss and tried to stand up straight but a throbbing headache grounded into his temples, causing him to stumble.
"You're obviously not. I heard you did overtime yesterday, did you even rest? Go home for today Ayato, come back only when you feel better." Tomo demanded with a caring undertone and Ayato could not do anything but oblige. Tomo helped Ayato to his desk to pack up his things before sending him out the company's doors.
"Do you need to call your wife?" Tomo questioned, concerned at how Ayato would go home in the state he was in now.
"No, it's alright. Thank you so much boss," Ayato bowed before gaining some of his energy to at least decently walk home. Tomo dismissed him and went back to do his work as the boss. Ayato decided against calling Thoma since he already troubled Thoma enough. He even forgot to inform Thoma that he would stay at work for the night and that probably caused Thoma to be worried. Ayato doesn't deserve Thoma. Thoma was too kind, too caring, too perfect for someone lame like Ayato.
Ayato was drowning in thoughts as he moved laboriously through the streets filled with people. The more he thought, the more he felt the strength in his body leave his body as he was on the verge of tears.
I don't deserve Thoma. He would be better off without me, wouldn't he? Having to take care of me since I'm so careless. I even got sick and now he has to bear the burden of a sick husband.
He reached the door to their shared apartment and tiredly searched around in his pocket to fumble around with the keys to the house. Shoving the key into the keyhole, he clumsily twisted it so that it'll open. Swinging the door open, Ayato stumbled into the house. Before he could do anything else, his body collapsed onto the floor leading into the living room from the door. He couldn't move. He didn't want to either. Tears slipped out of his eyes as he breathed heavily, he felt like his lungs were on fire as the air thrashed about in his lungs. Ayato passed out.
-------------
Thoma hummed a little song in joy as he bought the last plate of meat that happened to be on sale. 'Maybe I'll make some steak tonight~' Grabbing his many grocery bags, Thoma lifted them easily.
'Heh, I don't carry things every day for nothing.' Single-handedly leaving with the countless bags on his arms, he continued humming as he skipped home.
Upon reaching his apartment, he noticed a key inserted into the keyhole and that the door was slightly ajar. Preparing himself for the worse, Thoma pushed open the door with his back. On high alert.
He almost dropped his bags when he saw the sight in front of him. Ayato looked like he was knocked out on the floor. His suitcase still in hand, shoes still on his feet, breaths ragged. Throwing the grocery bags aside, he bent down to Ayato's level and touched his forehead with the back of his hand. It was scorching hot!
Noticing the tears that fell from his husband's eyes, he kissed it away.
Quickly taking off Ayato's shoes and removing his bag, Thoma effortlessly picked up the unconscious man and brought him into their room. Thoma stripped him and swiftly cleaned him up.
While cleaning Ayato up though, a sight made Thoma frown. He pushed it to the back of his mind and quickly dressed him into more comfortable clothes. Lying Ayato down onto their bed, Thoma went to get a bucket of cool water and a cloth. He dipped the cloth into the chilly water and placed it on Ayato's temple.
Thoma then picked up Ayato's clothes that were hurriedly strewn across the floor. He placed them into the laundry basket and heaved a sigh. Going to the abandoned groceries, Thoma sorted them out and arranged the food in their respective places.
"Hmm, I don't think Ayato can digest steak in that state... I guess I'll just make some chicken soup for him," Thoma thought as he started preparing lunch.
------------------
Ayato groaned as he woke up, feeling all sweaty and hot was uncomfortable. His throat was as dry as the desert and he wanted water, fast. He sat up and felt the wind get knocked out of him and his vision blackout before clearing up again. A damp cloth fell onto his lap and he looked around, he was safe at home and changed out of his work clothes. As he was about to recall what happened, a migraine consumed his head and he grumbled in pain. Holding his head in discomfort, he hoped it'll stop the migraine.
Thoma, who had rested his head on the side of the bed, awoke due to the movement of the mattress. Thoma blinked a few times before registering that Ayato was awake. Hastily, Thoma got up and grabbed the glass of water on Ayato's nightstand and offered it to him. Prying Ayato's hands off his head, he prompted Ayato to drink which he did.
That got rid of some pulsing in his head and Thoma worriedly put a hand on Ayato's forehead. It was still warm but at least it had gone down a bit. Thoma heaved a sigh of relief and left to get more water.
Ayato could feel his head pounding but pushed it to the back of his mind since more thoughts invaded his main train of thoughts.
Look at yourself, you had Thoma look after you. You really are such a disappointment, you know? You don't even know how to take care of yourself properly. I bet Thoma is so done with you right now.
Ayato stared down at his hands, what have I done? He pulled his hair in frustration. He burdened Thoma once again and he was sure Thoma was mad. Thoma would scold him as useless and kick him out. Then Thoma would-
"Hey, don't do that," The said man was now at his side. Ayato was so swallowed in his thoughts that he hadn't noticed but Thoma had untangled Ayato's hands from his hair and grasped it tightly in his own. Ayato looked up at Thoma's worried face and he let his tears fall.
"I...I'm s-sorry..." Ayato choked out, taking deep breathes in-between. This took Thoma by surprise and he quickly wiped Ayato's tears with his palms. Thoma hugged him and reassured him that he would be fine.
"It's okay, what do you even have to apologize for?" Thoma patted Ayato's shaking back and peppered Ayato's tear-filled face with kisses.
Ayato started mumbling things like how he was a burden and that he had made Thoma annoyed with him and how he was better off dead-
"Hey!" Thoma gripped Ayato's shoulders and stared him in the eye. "I thought we agreed on no more self-harm. Don't you dare kill yourself," Ayato sniffled and muttered more strings of how Thoma probably wants to take back that agreement and-
"Kamisato Ayato," Thoma said. Ayato immediately went silent and continued having his face looking downwards. "Look at me," Thoma added. Ayato hesitantly lifted his head and locked eyes with Thoma. He gulped on his saliva and waited anxiously for what Thoma was going to say. Thoma never used his full name to address him and now that he did, he was sure Thoma was beyond furious even though his face had no sign of it.
"Ayato, dear, I would never get mad at you for getting sick. You are not a burden to me and I'll say it as many times as I have to. I love you. So, don't overthink and suffer by yourself and tell me how you feel as well." Thoma spoke. Ayato's irises widened and he flushed with red. H-he hadn't expected Thoma to say that. He expected Thoma to reprimand him and say he was worthless.
"I... I'm sorry," Ayato diverted his gaze down and fiddled with his fingers. Just then, his head throbbed and Ayato doubled over in agony. Thoma offered the glass of water and Ayato instantly dunked it down his throat. Thoma left to get more water and Ayato smiled to himself. His husband was the best. Ayato couldn't believe he thought so low of Thoma. The reassurance Thoma gave him was also much needed.
Thoma then proceeded to feed Ayato the chicken soup, wipe the sweat off him and changed his clothes. They both lay down on the bed after Ayato pleaded with Thoma to stay with him.
"You know," Thoma started, getting a 'Hm?' as a reply.
"When I cleaned you up, I saw them. Your old cuts' scars. They terrified me, you know, Ayato." Thoma took a deep breath in and continued, "The thought of you hurting yourself makes me feel so incompetent as your husband and when I think of you degrading yourself so much, I never want to leave your side, ever. I want to keep telling you how much you mean to me and how much I love you for the rest of my life. So please, Ayato, don't think of yourself as worthless. Don't think that I would stop liking you. You are everything to me!" Thoma uttered as Ayato laid beside him, speechless.
"Promise me, Ayato, that you will talk to me whenever you feel upset or like a burden. I'll be here so please don't keep it to yourself. " Thoma pleaded and Ayato hummed.
"Okay, I promise."