Archive of Our Own ^beta

Namjoon thinks he’s only good at one thing and one thing alone. 

To care for the trees. 

And he truly does, care for the trees, but as soon as he opens the group chat of the university messaging app on his computer he can’t help but sometimes wonder if that’s the only thing he’s good at. 

Sure, Namjoon is a great professor. He’s hardworking, diligent, passionate - sometimes too passionate - and very, very admirable. Always working the extra mile, Namjoon is an active faculty for trips around the mountain ridges in the country, has made his name known amongst forest rangers, foresters, volunteers in the recreational parks, and even farmers. Inside the university, everyone loves him just as much. Some may have been only close to him for requests and academic help because aside from being good at taking care of the trees, Kim Namjoon is one exceptional faculty member. 

The students love his lectures, almost the entire department are active volunteers for forest recreational programs and render their services all year-round to raise awareness about caring for the forest’s needs, lessening carbon footprint, and saving endangered flora and fauna. 

In short, he’s the best in what he does. He’s won Best Professor in his department for three consecutive years. And he’s only started working as an official professor three years ago. He’s been a TA first and even made a name out of his involvement and eagerness to just be good. 

When his colleagues tease him of compiling all his words and his plans on a module and sharing it with everyone else, Namjoon had laughed behind his chipped porcelain mug. He doesn’t need to have a manual of how he’s doing these things. Everything just comes naturally, like the leaves of a growing plant bending where the sunlight shines the most. 

But Namjoon wouldn’t deny the fact that he might need a manual now. Especially after seeing his friends’ messages on their group chat. In honesty, Namjoon needs a lot of manual, one is about how to keep up with their friend’s ceaseless chatters.

Seokjin (Business): Dr. Gwangboo’s looking for Yoongi, has anyone seen him?

Seokjin (Business): Namjoon, is Yoongi with you?

Taehyung (Arts): he sent a message saying he’s tuning the grand piano for an exam later. Hyung, why are you in the music department tho??

Hoseok (Arts): I think he’s with Jimin. He explained some music stuff for stuff??

Seokjin (Business): very helpful…

Jimin (Education): Jin-hyung, Yoongi-hyung just left. He helped explain music theory for a paper I’ve given to my students ㅋㅋㅋ

Taehyung (Arts): is that allowed??

Jimin (Education): I submitted my proposal a month ago >.< it’s allowed. It’s integrating and improving relations

Jeongguk (Arts): it’s only 8 AM and you’re all working already??

Hoseok (Arts): our department has a meeting in 8:30

Jeongguk (Arts): shit! That's today?

Seokjin (Business): I am not even surprised 

Taehyung (Arts): buy me chocolate milk Jeongguk! 

Hoseok (Arts): if he makes it on time ㅋㅋㅋ

Namjoon rolls his eyes at the way their chat turns chaotic every single time. After placing his bag on the cubby behind his seat, he settles on his chair and pulls out the drawer where his keyboard is kept. He glances at the time and thinks of what he can do while waiting for his first class. His computer pings and he leans closer to read the next fire of messages. 

Hoseok (Arts): what are you doing in the music department tho, hyung?

Seokjin (Business): I need help with some stats and yoongi works faster than my faculty

Seokjin (Business): also, went to deliver his lunch

Hoseok (Arts): that’s wow. What about our lunch hyung??

Seokjin (Business): it’s with Jimin, he’ll drop it to yours, including Namjoon’s

Taehyung (Arts): did you forget Hoseok-hyung? Yoongi-hyung solves math in his free time

Namjoon smiles at that. It’s true, they both solve calculus and figure out other possible solutions when they both get tired of dealing with their actual course load. And he’s thankful that Seokjin has so much time to prepare all of the food for his 6 dongsaengs. As much as he enjoys trying different set meals from the cafeteria, that place gets crowded too easily even if professors are given much leeway. 

Hoseok (Arts): can’t you just message hyung personally??

Seokjin (Business): already did but he’s not answering

Taehyung (Arts): maybe he’s still tuning the grand piano

Seokjin (Business): Joonie??

Namjoon sighs and starts typing, knowing that he can’t avoid the inevitable. Everyone knows each other’s schedule and Seokjin knows that his class starts at 10. But like any diligent and decent employee, Namjoon gets to the university at the earliest time possible. Seokjin is also aware that Yoongi drops by his office first thing in the morning. 

Namjoon (Science): Haven’t heard from him, hyung

Taehyung (Arts): awww, I am surprised you didn’t cry, Joonie-hyung

Namjoon snorts and rolls his eyes. Sometimes he wishes for a new set of friends. But then again, he wouldn’t replace all six of them. 

Hoseok (Arts): don’t you text each other first thing in the morning??

Namjoon (Science): ????

Hoseok (Arts): aren’t you the ultimate best friends? 11 years and counting?

Namjoon (Science): aren’t you, hoba, our best friend, too? 

Hoseok (Arts): I gave up reminding everyone on the 8th year 

Hoseok (Arts): you’re both too loud about it anyway.

Hoseok (Arts): yeah, we came from the same high school since but I don’t want to be involved with that type of tension

Taehyung (Arts): awww, hoseokie-hyung, it’s not tension, it's pining. there’s a difference. 

Hoseok (Arts): they’re both dancing and they’re making me dizzy so it’s the same!

Seokjin (Business): ㅋㅋㅋ

Namjoon (Science): ????

Seokjin (Business): ㅋㅋㅋ

Taehyung (Arts):ㅋㅋㅋ

Seokjin (Business): Joonie only knows pine trees 

Hoseok (Arts): ㅋㅋㅋ

Before Namjoon could respond, he hears a knock on his door. He lifts his chin to see who wants to see him this early in the morning and he feels his heart sinking in his gut. No matter how much he’s supposed to be used to this, he still gets an entire flowerbed swaying in the pits of his stomach.  

A gummy smile, black soft hair, thin silver wired glasses, black coat on top of a plain white shirt, two cups of coffee, and a paper bag of what Namjoon thinks is filled with egg bread appears from behind the door. It’s Min Yoongi, the man Seokjin is - Dr. Gwangboo - looking for, the man who helped Jimin with a proposal; the man who’s been friends with Hoseok for more than a decade; the man who he’s in love with.

Min Yoongi. The prodigy of the Music Department. The man Namjoon wishes he’s good at expressing his romantic feelings with; the reason sometimes Namjoon wishes there was a manual on how to court and to confess and to date. But alas! Namjoon is only the 21st century Lorax and nothing more. Seokjin is lying, though. He doesn’t only know about pine trees. He knows what pining is (unfortunately and fortunately) too. 

After all, he’s been pining for Yoongi for more than a decade now. It’s truly unfortunate to fall in love with your best friend. But he’s fortunate to fall for Min Yoongi, nonetheless.  No matter how much they’ve fought a lot on their first year together in high school, he is still fortunate. No matter how much they’ve argued a lot on what program to take since they were both scared to be parted, afraid that they would forget their friendship, he’s fortunate. No matter how much they’ve screamed and shouted at each other on nights one was skipping meals or ignoring the need to sleep due to deadlines and papers, he’ll be fortunate. No matter how much they’ve avoided each other, they were only worried that they might go separate ways after graduating, he’s always fortunate.

Their friendship is very peculiar but comforting - in a sense, at least for Namjoon - since no matter how many times they throw things at each other, shout at each other, and walk away from one another, they both know they didn’t mean it. There was no real threat, no hate, no mirth, it’s just—Namjoon knows how to express himself better with actions. 

Even though everyone thinks he’s magnificent with his words - he can formulate the best speech, deliver the best class - Namjoon’s negativity can’t easily be filtered. When he’s in front of Min Yoongi, he doesn’t think before he acts, doesn’t organize his thoughts before he speaks because everything just comes out so naturally. He loves Yoongi silently loud, silent in action yet loud in intention. 

Besides, Yoongi doesn’t like talking either. He’s more of the act of service is a sign-of-my-care type of a guy. 

Like now. 

The elder takes a step inside his office and kicks the door softly with his hip to shut it close. Namjoon quickly pulls out a small stool from the corner of his room and places it at the end of the desk. He sees Yoongi eyeing the potted plants lined at his windowsill. Namjoon takes great care of those plants. After all, the elder had gifted all of them. 

“Always so early,” Yoongi grins, placing the tray of iced Americano and the paper bag on Namjoon’s table. The younger watches Yoongi settle on his seat and pulls out the egg bread. He smiles when his theory was confirmed. 

“Just checking if I got everything ready for class, is all,” Namjoon murmurs, reaching out for the cup of his drink. Yoongi only hums and runs his fingers on his hair. It fluffs back and Namjoon smiles, eyes crinkling at the sides, at the act. 

“You never leave your office unprepared for the next day, Joon-ah,” Yoongi points out, picking up the bread and taking a bite. Namjoon mirrors and watches as the elder chew on his food. They inhaled their food in comfortable silence. 

“Still,” Namjoon clears his throat by sipping a drink. “There’s no harm done in making sure. Oh, by the way, Yoongi-hyung,” Namjoon runs his tongue against his teeth, feeling conscious and careful before he speaks again. “Dr. Gwangboo is looking for you.”

Yoongi tilts his head to the side and furrows his brows, deep in thought. Namjoon nods at him passively. He isn’t even surprised anymore that Yoongi had forgotten whatever it was that he needed to do as per his dean’s instructions. Yoongi is a music prodigy, the pride of their department but that’s just it. Like Namjoon, Yoongi is the best and like Namjoon, Yoongi is only good at one thing and that’s music—playing, making, explaining, and teaching. Other demands outside music appreciation and enjoyment are the least of Yoongi’s problems. 

Yoongi dismisses the topic nonchalantly and Namjoon shakes his head, amused. He’s trying his best not to flash a wide smile at the elder, knowing that Yoongi hates to be reminded how forgetful he is. 

There’s another ping from the computer and Yoongi looks at the screen. Namjoon does the same and snorts at the conversation that has jumped away from the original topic on hand. Apparently, Jeongguk made it but Taehyung is whining for his forgotten request. Seokjin has reminded the rest about a dinner at his place this coming weekend. Namjoon reminds himself to write it down later. There’s a higher chance that Yoongi will forget the dinner so it’s his task to remind the elder. It’s his duty or else Seokjin will remove them from weekly lunch benefits and monthly weekend dinners. Even though he can fully feed himself like a proper adult, he rather eat meals prepared by his hyungs than try to operate the microwave. There’s a reason why Yoongi brings him breakfast in the morning. He’s hopeless and a disaster in the kitchen. 

“It’s only Wednesday,” Yoongi murmurs, reaching across the desk to reach for the packet of wet wipes. Namjoon chuckles when the elder didn’t reach it and does it for him. Yoongi only grumbles and Namjoon lets out an amused snort. He opens the cap and offers the packet to Yoongi. The elder pulls out a tissue and cleans his hands. Naturally, he reaches for Namjoon’s hands and wipes them clean himself. Namjoon only watches in silence. It’s common between them, so common that it’s become so natural and just—it’s always been there. 

Namjoon’s been used to this already, no more words, no more worried glances. It has always been this natural between them. So natural that Namjoon would just look at Yoongi wherever they may be, whatever he may need, whenever it may be. Usually, Yoongi would tease him for being such a big baby. But in some cases, Yoongi would just quietly attend to Namjoon’s needs without question. 

Yoongi pokes at Namjoon’s left palm and the younger smiles softly at their almost connected hands. It’s soothing and at the same time weird that Namjoon finds the tips of Yoongi’s finger soft despite both of them having calloused hands. 

“We can’t risk you dropping crumbs on your keyboard,” Yoongi tells him sternly, but the knowing smile that follows after made Namjoon’s heart settle back in his gut again. It’s unfair how quickly his heart just leaps elsewhere when Yoongi does things for him. His heart just managed to regain its original position when they were eating the egg bread in silence. 

“Are you saying that I am not tidy?”

The elder folds the tissue and places it inside the paper bag. He lifts his cup and gets up from his stool. He tosses the trash in the bin against the wall and grins at the younger. 

“Between the two of us, it’s me who’s lazy in cleaning,” Yoongi says, reaching for the doorknob.

“Exactly, hyung,” Namjoon affirms, getting up on his feet and rounding the table. They both stand behind the closed door and Namjoon reaches for the crumb left on Yoongi’s philtrum. Yoongi blinks behind his glasses and almost crosses his eyes when Namjoon shows him the crumb. Namjoon fights the urge to lick his finger clean and instead, flicks the crumb away. The elder rolls his eyes and fixes the glasses on the bridge of his nose.

Yoongi playfully scowls at him when Namjoon smirks at the elder and kicks Namjoon at his shin playfully. It’s so easy to just rile the elder up and Namjoon lives for the moments he can just freely do things like this. In retrospect, it’s the only thing he’s good at when it concerns Yoongi. Namjoon only chuckles and reaches for the doorknob as well, wrapping his hand around the elder’s, and together, they twist it open. 

“By the way,” Yoongi says before stepping out of Namjoon’s office. Namjoon lets go of the hold to glue his hand on his side. “I might be staying late since I need to check some musical scores. Jeongguk’s media class and my music prod had a team project.”

Namjoon admires how Yoongi - even though he keeps on denying it - likes integration. If only Yoongi had been as punctual with his own paperwork, he would’ve been last year’s best professor awardee in his department for incorporating and collaborating with other departments. Namjoon has even collaborated with his class once and it was amazing. Min Yoongi is one amazing and kind man. It’s one of the long lists of reasons Namjoon loves him. But see, Namjoon wants to love, learn how to love - a complex entity, really - and do it all for Min Yoongi. He has a lot of things going on in his mind, mostly consists of just being endeared and fond at the elder, hoping that he has the valor of worth to meet Yoongi's expectations. 

But Namjoon could only admire him from now, like how he’d always admire the ginkgo trees change the color of their leaves—from afar, patient and waiting, no matter for how long. 

“It’s only the beginning of the semester, hyung,” Namjoon muses.

“It’s a project from the winter sessions and make-up classes. It’s late but Jeongguk charmed his dean and so, here we are.”

“I will wait for you. I already have essays to check anyway,” Namjoon tells him, reaching to pat the elder on his shoulder. 

“It’s going to be a long night though,” Yoongi counters softly. “You can always ask Hoseok to send you home.”

Namjoon only waves at him, careful not to look so sad about the idea and not too eager and persistent on going with the elder instead. They always go home together. Yoongi is Namjoon’s ride home for three years now. They’ve never skipped a night going home together. Namjoon likes being with Yoongi, anyway. It feels like they still have a lot to learn about each other. So much more. The younger is a big baby yes since he still can’t drive and he has no license. But it’s also because there’s always been an agreement between the two of them. Unspoken it may be, but they’ve sworn to be there for each other, the ultimate best friends. 

Sometimes, though, Namjoon wishes they can be more than that. But again: he has no manual on romance and he only knows how to care for trees. That’s it. He is also ignorant on how to care for a broken heart if ever Yoongi rejects him. Namjoon’s negativity seems to never switch off when it concerns Yoongi. He’s tried it a lot of time; a decade after, nothing has changed. 

He’ll never know if Yoongi will reject him because he’s afraid to even try. There’s no way he’s going to confess because he’ll always be afraid at the thought of being rejected by the man he’s promised (to himself) to love until his last breath. It’s better this way. This way, there’s no need on securing a manual on how to care for a heart that’s been shattered into billion pieces. He doesn't even need a manual on how to do micro-agriculture. Why does he need a manual for something so…small?

Like his Yoongi-hyung. He shakes the thoughts away and cries at Yoongi petulantly. 

 “It’s Wednesday, hyung. Liberal Arts date night. I can’t be there.”

Yoongi opens his mouth with a soft Ah and laughs, shaking his head lightly, amazed. “Of course. Let me save you from the horror then. I don’t know if you’re going to enjoy staying in the studio for 3 hours straight, though.” Namjoon watches as Yoongi rubs the back of his neck, eyes everywhere but at him. 

The younger places a hand on his chest - just atop his heart - and scrunches his face in mock-offense. “You wound me! I was with you when you cooped in your studio for hours end when we were in undergrads. I even skipped one class just so I could keep you company.”

When he sees the way the elder’s cheeks turn slightly pink, Namjoon thinks he’s said something okay. He’s never good at expressing his adoration and care for the elder in words, but he’s glad that his honesty is working. 

“Fine,” Yoongi relents. “I’ll order us dinner and let you eat inside the studio as long as you promise not to spill anything on my equipment.”

“Says the person who just left crumbs on the tip of his nose,” Namjoon teases. 

The resounding chuckle that has stuck in Namjoon’s head until the moment he’s reached his class that morning wouldn’t stop the young professor from smiling. 

—

Seokjin (Business): it’s been a month since the opening of the sem

Hoseok (Arts): ㅋㅋㅋ ngl, been waiting for a jeju getaway since undergrad

Taehyung (Arts): i love you hyungs, but i must win!! I need a vacation away from sociology books!

Jimin (Education): i deserve the vacation the best! Handling pre-service teachers are the worst

Seokjin (Business): children 

Seokjin (Business): we all know the prize should be mine

Jeongguk (Arts): no way! I had to stop crushing on namjoon-hyung 

Jeongguk (Arts): i willingly broke my heart to give way

Jimin (Education): you’re in a relationship with tae tae and hoseok-hyung??

Jimin (Education): so dramatic >,< 

Taehyung (Arts): you’re lucky i love you kookie >:[

Seokjin (Business): children 

Hoseok (Arts): i was with them the longest, i need a break from the pining!

Taehyung (Arts): i was there when Namjoon-hyung fights his urge to kiss Yoongi-hyung silly! The prize should be mine.

Jimin (Education): is that how you care for your soulmate, taehyung-ah??

Seokjin (Business): tae tae, remember the rules, no helping…

Jeongguk (Arts): agree! It’s the rules, hyung. We let them figure their shit out

Hoseok (Arts): 11 years and still figuring their shit out 

Taehyung (Arts): i only said ‘Yoongi-hyung, marry me’ what’s wrong about that??

Jimin (Education): you always attach Joonie-hyung’s name that’s why

Jeongguk (Arts): it’s against the rules!

Seokjin (Business): children, ok ok i get it. So state your dates

Seokjin (Business): i hope they figure it out already because this AY is more demanding

Seokjin (Business): i am getting old in the profession and i need a break before i deal with my dissertation.

Jeongguk (Arts): idky i let you convince me to be a prof, hyungs o-<-<

Taehyung (Arts): because of the stipend?

Jimin (Education): because you love us :”>

Hoseok (Arts): because the uni loves to keep talented alumni and you’re golden

Jeongguk (Arts): awww, hyung!

Jimin (Education: i wanna hear praises too!

—

Namjoon always gets so excited when it’s Springtime. It’s the beginning of everything; like a tiny bud eager to bloom after long winter nights. It’s the dendrophile in him, the nemophila in his senses, that just makes him swoon at the blossoming flowers and the never-ending evergreens. He’s considered himself poetic but it’s a secret between him and Yoongi alone. Like all other things only the two of them know. 

Spring means a new semester, a new set of books, a new curriculum, a new set of students (even though, technically, Namjoon meets new students every sem), and a new potted plant that Yoongi has sworn on buying him. 

It started as a joke, a joke that has turned into something traditional and exclusive between the two of them. There are a lot of exclusive things between them that sometimes Namjoon thinks they are already in an exclusive relationship. But he can only dream. 

On his first semester of their first year as a professor, Namjoon had received a tiny plant of Senecio from Yoongi. The elder had said that he saw the succulent dying and rescued it. Namjoon had snorted at the words. The plant wasn’t dying. It was new and in a good condition. He’d even seen the tag underneath the pot when he had placed it happily on his windowsill after admiring it for an hour. Yoongi had shyly placed the pot on Namjoon’s desk that afternoon, and had left in a hurry, without explaining anything aside from It’s dying and it’s cute, save the plant, Namu!

Said succulent is no longer tiny and is placed on the windowsill of Namjoon’s office alongside the other potted plants. He’d received all kinds of plants, mostly tiny indoor succulents because Namjoon likes to make his office akin to a greenhouse but not in a manner that his dean will call his attention for. 

It’s only 6 weeks since the opening of the Spring semester so Namjoon isn’t surprised to see a paper bag - a massive paper bag - on his desk when he entered the room. Yoongi never gives anything on time. Namjoon finds a peculiar charm in the act. He’s just finished his last class for the day, manila folders against his chest and back aching from teaching a back-to-back class without break. His load this semester is as packed as his previous schedule and he’s the only person to be blamed. He’s always doing things the extra mile and that’s something he won’t ever deny. 

He glances outside the window behind his chair and smiles at the soft lilac and orange shades of the sky. Yoongi’s last class won’t be ending anytime soon but he’s already wondering what their dinner plans would be since it’s only Tuesday. As much as he loves spending time with everyone, he savors the quiet time he shares with Yoongi the best. 

He steps inside his office, leaving the door open since half of his colleagues had already left, no one’s going to bother him at this time of the day and exhales deeply.

“Joon-ah,” a voice so familiar in his ears says and Namjoon looks over his shoulder to see Hoseok grinning widely at him. His tie is loosely hanging around his neck and the messenger bag already hiked on his right shoulder. 

“Hoba,” Namjoon greets, placing the manila folders on the desk. Hoseok steps into his office as well and stands beside him. Namjoon sees Hoseok peek inside the paper bag and blinks when the Liberal Arts professor gasps dramatically. 

“He got you a bonsai!”

Namjoon pulls the paper bag to his space. He carefully reaches for the pot and pulls the plant out. It’s a bonsai, indeed. Perfectly trimmed, tiny and in its isosceles triangle form. The Science professor smiles to himself, loving how Yoongi remembered how he likes the way bonsai plants are kept in this way. 

“Ah, it’s for the beginning of the sem,” Hoseok laughs, playfully bumping their hips. “I hope you know what the bonsai plant means, Joonie.”

The younger only looks at him, startled and curious. He scrunches his face and picks up the paper bag. 

“It’s just a plant, hyung,” Namjoon replies, folding the paper bag neatly. 

Hoseok chuckles and swats at his arm playfully. “Science majors are so daft.”

“Art majors always complicate everything,” Namjoon laughs back. He rounds the desk and arranges the 10 pots on his windowsill. Ten tiny plants for all the semester and sessions he’d spent in the university. It should only be 9 since Namjoon actively teaches for Summer and Winter sessions. The tenth pot was given last January when Namjoon became a speaker for one conference held in Busan. Yoongi had gifted him a Moon Cactus for doing the job well done. 

Now it seems that Yoongi has surpassed his succulent phase and is venturing out on other types of plants. Not that Namjoon has a problem with that, only the bonsai plant won’t fit against the windowsill. He scans his office, with Hoseok silently observing him and typing on his phone, and spots a small round stool he’d used last time to hold his files. He crosses the room and picks up the wooden stool and wipes the dust off. 

“What time are you going home?” Hoseok asks, sliding his phone in his pocket and watching Namjoon arrange the stool against the wall beside the window. 

“Once Yoongi-hyung’s done with his class,” Namjoon replies, crouching a bit to make sure the legs are sturdy and don't shake. He taps at the base of the stool and hums to himself happily. 

“You’ll wait for another two hours?”

“I always wait for him,” Namjoon answers absentmindedly, busy rotating the bonsai pot in place. “We’ve been like this for ages, what do you mean.”

“That you do,” Hoseok giggles knowingly. “That’s why you’re getting a bonsai plant, Namjoon-ah.”

Namjoon glances at the elder and raises a brow. 

“You’re not after symbolisms again, are you?”

“Symbolism makes everything in life worth looking forward to,” Hoseok counters with a grin. “Trying to survive is a struggle, trying to live,” Namjoon raises a brow at the way Hoseok speaks so theatrically. “Now that makes symbolism worthy of living. I am sure Yoongi-hyung knows the meaning of each plant he gets you. Just in case you forget, Yoongi’s a music major, he’s very sentimental.”

“Symbolism makes people believe in senseless things,” Namjoon huffs, finally pleased with how he’s positioned the bonsai plant. 

“It doesn’t mean you’re exempted from it,” the elder says coyly, shrugging his shoulders and flashing a mischievous grin. 

“I like to keep things facts-based and be realistic,” Namjoon sits on his swivel chair and pulls the manila folder closer. 

“I can’t believe that you’re best friends with me,” Hoseok laughs. “And that you’re willingly waiting for Yoongi-hyung until 8 PM. That means something, surely!”

Namjoon rolls his eyes. He opens the manila folder on top of his stack and retrieves his green pen. 

“See!” Hoseok chuckles. “Your silence and action mean that you’re asking me to leave. That’s a symbol.”

“It’s a non-communicative cue ,” Namjoon corrects. “So if you’re done, I am nonverbally asking you to go home and be with Taehyung and Jeongguk. Please leave me alone. I’ll patiently wait for my ride home by checking these papers.”

The cackle that erupts from Hoseok made the younger smile but it doesn’t mean that his words left his mind. 

Namjoon knows what Hoseok meant and it’s painful that maybe Yoongi doesn’t know what the gifts imply. He knows what succulent plants symbolize. He’s a biology professor after all. And no matter how much he likes to keep everything fact-based, there’s no harm in giving meaning to flora and fauna like a poet. Music is as symbolic as any poem, and Namjoon sometimes wonders if Yoongi’s aware of it. 

He wonders if the elder is aware that succulent plants mean unconditional love and that the bonsai plant holds so much meaning for Namjoon. It depicts age, stability, and balance. 

Namjoon wonders if Yoongi thought of getting the bonsai plant out of their strong, well-balanced, and long friendship. 

He hopes it’s more than that. He keeps hoping but hoping only gives a fake sense of assurance. And instead of making himself believe in something so stupid , he busies himself scanning thesis statements one after the other. 

He can counter his students’ ideas on how to minimize carbon footprint rather than counter a heartbreak that could happen. Or may never happen, but the dreading and the worrying will always be there. He can deal with a student crying for a rejected proposal, but the idea of being rejected scares him the best. And so, he silently checks the papers, glances once in a while at the bonsai plant on his left side, and waits for the time he’s supposed to leave his office and cross the campus to meet Yoongi in his studio. 

He’s as good as any of his friends in the Liberal Arts department when it comes to symbolism, but he’s not as good at accepting what Yoongi’s actions could mean. 

He rather keeps things simple, like one of the bonsai plant’s symbols - simplicity - instead of throwing caution to the wind. 

—

Hoseok (Arts): Yoongi gave namjoon a bonsai plant this sem

Taehyung (Arts): awwww is this the year that i am going to go to jeju??

Jeongguk (Arts): it’s just a plant? 

Jimin (Education): bonsai meant harmony and age 

Taehyung (Arts): patience too and passion

Jeongguk (Arts): i don’t see love but carry on

Jimin (Education): always after what the naked eye sees boooooring

Jeongguk (Arts): media arts is the best program, 

Jeongguk (Arts): fight me jimin-ssi

Hoseok (Arts): please don’t forget that Yoongi’s been giving succulents 

Seokjin (Business): all i understand is yoongi’s courting namjoon through potted plants

Seokjin (Business): wherever yoongi brought the plants, i am sure the owner’s happy

Seokjin (Business): bonsai plants are expensive

Taehyung (Arts): you’re only after profits

Seokjin (Business): of course!! and i have a feeling that Namjoon will be the first one to confess this time

Seokjin (Business): i’ve been betting for yoongi since college and nothing happened

Seokjin (Business): i am getting old for this

Jeongguk (Arts): on what day tho?? 

Hoseok (Arts): my bet this year is at the beginning of the fall semester, namjoon

Jimin (Education): i stick to my call 

Jimin (Education): beginning of the summer session with Yoongi confessing

Seokjin (Business): it’s annoying that we have to consider the entire academic year 

Seokjin (Business): the loss is annoying

Taehyung (Arts): winter session with Namjoon confessing for me

Jeongguk (Arts): you’re going for winter because you’ve tried all seasons and yet nada! 

Hoseok (Arts): to be fair, we’ve already rounded the entire calendar

Jimin (Education): and still nothing

Jimin (Education): but i will stick to my date, this might be my year!

Jeongguk (Arts): beginning of the fall semester with yoongi

Hoseok (Arts): you just copied mine

Jeongguk (Arts): i am betting with yoongi, i didn’t copy you

Seokjin (Business): namjoon mid close to the ending of Fall semester. 

Seokjin (Business): i have a strong feeling this time

—

“You’re staring,” Namjoon blinks his eyes a couple of times and furrows his brows, hiding the fact that he was caught. 

They’re sitting in the communal lounge in the administration building one afternoon. Classes were suspended after 3 PM, reminding the students to submit withdrawal forms if there are any and professors to submit their list of students who’ll enroll for the summer sessions. Namjoon was tasked to give the list from his faculty and it just so happened that Yoongi was given the same responsibility.

Namjoon scans the professor before him and smiles - deep dimples and all - hoping that it’ll work to distract Yoongi and his jumbled thoughts. 

The thing is, he’s too bright. Min Yoongi is always too bright that it is impossible not to stare at him. And it’s cumbersome that Namjoon’s eyes always scan for Yoongi, searching for and staring at the man is something Namjoon has grown used to. 

He’ll always search for Yoongi, always stare at him, and will always admire him. Even though the admiration is manifested into shamelessly ogling at the elder. 

Namjoon couldn’t decide which looks better to the elder. Today, he’s not wearing his eyeglasses and he’s only wearing a simple black button-down shirt and dress pants that are perfectly tailored against his figure. Namjoon had always admired his hyung’s thin legs. It always makes him want to care for the elder despite the elder refuting against the idea. 

That is one of the reasons why he was staring. Yoongi looks so good like he always does every single day. 

The other reason he was staring is because of a smudged black ink on Yoongi’s right cheekbone. Namjoon is slightly alarmed that Yoongi had crossed the campus with a stain on his face. He can already imagine the knowing gazes and how Yoongi just ignored all of them, oblivious of he looked. He definitely appeared like a furious kitten and Namjoon giggles to himself, picturing the professor in his mind. 

He reaches for Yoongi across the small coffee table and pulls the elder with his wrist. Yoongi instantly gets up and takes two steps before sitting beside the younger on the two-seated couch. 

“It’s hard to look away,” Namjoon says and bites his tongue at the bravery. 

Yoongi smirks at him and places his kraft envelope atop Namjoon’s on the younger’s lap. Namjoon likes it that Yoongi doesn’t pull his arm away. The younger rubs the other professor’s inner wrist and licks his free thumb. 

The elder watches in silence but flinches when Namjoon rubs the same thumb on his right cheekbone. Namjoon repeats the action and Yoongi stays rooted in his seat, but relaxed albeit with the faint blush on his cheeks. 

“What are you doing?” 

“Hmm?”

Namjoon sees Yoongi eyeing their surroundings and Namjoon mirrors the act, glad that they’re the only faculty members in the lounge. 

After wiping the smudge clean on the third try, Namjoon beams at the elder and boops Yoongi’s nose. 

“You walked from your department building looking like an idiot,” Namjoon answers. The responding whack at the back of his head had him belting out a breathy laugh. 

“It’s true!” Namjoon defends, rubbing the back of his head with a pout. “There’s a smudge on your cheek. It’s probably from the whiteboard marker.”

Yoongi only rolls his eyes and scoffs. He leans against the backrest and closes his eyes. Namjoon naturally places an arm atop the backrest so Yoongi could lay his head and be comfortable. 

“It’s the application for minor programs next week,” Yoongi grumbles, shifting his head to the side, giving Namjoon a full view of his face. “I don’t like having new faces from other programs.”

Namjoon instinctively folds his elbow and pats the elder’s head. “You just don’t like to admit that you’re famous, hyung.”

“What do you mean famous,” Yoongi grumbles, crossing his arms and leaning towards Namjoon in a curl. “I don’t like STEM students applying for minor programs in my department. They’re all logical.”

“Being logical is important in setting the melody, though, is it not?”

Yoongi curls in more, his nearest knee folded on the couch, and bumped Namjoon’s thigh. 

“It’s easy if it’s you,” Yoongi mumbles. Namjoon smiles triumphantly as he continues to massage the professor’s scalp. 

“Music’s always easy to learn too, when it’s from you,” Namjoon tells him softly, so soft that Yoongi must have not heard it. Namjoon wraps his arm around Yoongi’s frame and pulls the elder close, guiding Yoongi’s head against his shoulder. 

When Yoongi didn’t tussle, he’s glad that he could spare the elder a few minutes of nap. For the past week, Yoongi’s been staying late, organizing the list for students who are applying to double majors in the music department. Almost all departments are doing the same, but students from Yoongi’s department have the highest number with double major takers. It could be because Music is both a gift and course, especially when searching for job opportunities. 

Namjoon has witnessed how Yoongi double majored in Piano and Sound Engineering and even minored in Music Therapy and Teaching. Having a sense of security is greater than any passion out there, Namjoon had learned. He didn’t believe it at first but he’d spent long nights with Yoongi back in college and even in their graduate school to know that not everything can be that easy.

“If it’s easy, then everyone else will be doing it, too,” Yoongi had said one night. They had been cooping in Namjoon’s dorm, which was closer to the campus compared to Yoongi’s, for exam week. 

“As much as I like to agree, I think I don’t like how you’re slowly killing yourself just so you would stand out,” Namjoon had countered, placing a cup of coffee before the elder. “You’re studying four programs in total, don’t you get tired?”

“I do,” Yoongi had confessed, voice deep and low. Namjoon had furrowed his brows, concerned. But when Yoongi had flashed him a wide gummy smile, Namjoon had found himself relaxing. 

“It’s hard to notice my hardships when I am with you,” Yoongi had said with a blinding smile. “Everything seems easier when it’s with you.”

He’s always been too bright, too bright for Namjoon to handle. But at the same time, Namjoon will always crave more. He keeps on asking for more. And if he’ll end up withering like a plant given too much sun, it doesn’t matter. He is going to continue asking for more. 

“Oh, Namjoon-hyung,” Jimin whispers. He sees the education professor eyeing them carefully yet with loving eyes. Namjoon smiles in greeting, his hand at the back of Yoongi’s head, cradling him and the other hand on the kraft envelopes on his lap. 

“Didn’t know you’d be the one tasked to bring the list,” Namjoon tells the younger. 

“I am the youngest faculty member in my department, of course, it has to be me,” Jimin whines with a pout. Namjoon sees that he’s holding two more kraft envelopes and grins knowingly. He picks up the envelopes on his lap and offers them to Jimin. 

Jimin scoffs but reaches for the envelopes and glares at Namjoon. Namjoon knows it’s an empty threat. 

“It’s as if you only waited for me to come just so you can pass this too,” Jimin teases. “You’re no different with Jin-hyung and Hoseokie-hyung.”

“We’re all raised by Jin-hyung,” Namjoon laughs softly, fingers still carding at Yoongi’s head. “Of course, we’d adapted his temperament.”

Jimin lets out a loud annoying whine. It’s so loud that it startled Namjoon and Jimin’s eyes went wide, afraid that he might’ve woken up Yoongi. Yoongi shuffles in Namjoon’s hold and slowly pulls away. He sleepily blinks at Jimin and then looks at Namjoon with a pout on his lips. 

Namjoon smiles softly at the elder. It’s the first thing Namjoon will always do, smile at Yoongi whatever the reason is. He’ll smile at Yoongi and just flash how much he’s endeared by the elder. He’s only brave with his actions, and he’ll never be brave with words. 

“Oops,” Jimin mumbles, hugging the envelopes against his chest. 

“Still sleepy, hyung?” Namjoon asks, his free hand rubbing at Yoongi’s cheekbone softly. 

Yoongi nods, eyes closing again and Namjoon guides the elder with his hand at the back of Yoongi’s head down his neck. 

“10 more minutes,” Yoongi mumbles against the column of Namjoon’s throat. He clutches at the front of the younger’s shirt and is asleep instantaneously.

“Take all the time you need,” Namjoon whispers, tucking his chin on the crown of Yoongi’s head lightly. When he looks at the education professor, Jimin is no longer standing there anymore. 

And the thing is, it’s always been him and Yoongi. Grounded towards each other, anchored together, ever since he’d remembered. Sure, their friends were there, too, and he’s thankful, truly. But there’s always this hidden charm and novelty that he shares almost everything with Yoongi and no one else. 

The only thing he doesn’t inform the elder is his one-sided love for him. He doesn’t know if he’ll ever have the guts to share that with him. The sense of security suddenly strikes his mind, hand massaging Yoongi’s hand and the back of his neck. 

Maybe this is what Yoongi had meant when he said, everything’s easier with you . 

Because he feels the same way, too. 

—

Jimin (Education): i have a feeling i am going to win!!!

Seokjin (Business): spill

Jimin (Education): i saw them cuddling in the communal lounge in the administration building

Jimin (Education): yoongi hyung is napping on namjoon hyung’s shoulder

Jimin (Eduation): namjoon’s caressing yoongi’s hair!!!! Guys!!!

Jeongguk (Arts): that’s character development

Jeongguk (Arts): namjoon hyung’s not that tactile right??

Hoseok (Arts): only to yoongi he is

Seokjin (Business): so they just took a nap there in the communal lounge??

Seokjin (Business): when we’re chained on our desk for the readings?

Hoseok (Arts): we finished reading our grades yesterday jin-hyung, lmfao grades submission is today

Seokjin (Business): hush

Seokjin (Business): if i’m the president, i’d fire them both. they’re bad for business

Taehyung (Arts): are you afraid that Jimin might actually win?

Jimin (Education): we’re almost half way done the semester

Jimin (Education): summer session starts in June!

Jeongguk (Arts): it’s still april, jimin-ssi

Hoseok (Arts): you’re still so far away from winning

Jimin (Education): YOU’RE the one who’s sooooo far away from winning >:\

Jeongguk (Arts): i have faith that yoongi hyung will not rush things and confess on Fall Semester

Jeongguk (Arts): yoongi has never failed me

Jeongguk (Arts): he’s a good kid

Hoseok (Arts): we want them to get their shit together asap, not prolong the agony

Taehyung (Arts): yoongi hyung likes to think himself like a camel anyway

Taehyung(Arts): he’ll be slow, slower than we all think

Seokjin (Business): slower means the end of Fall Semester.

Seokjin (Business): it means i’ll win the trip to Jeju you’ve all been saving for

Jimin (Education): i will win this year, for sure!!!

—

Namjoon considers himself as someone who’s great with kids. Or so he likes to make himself believe. If taking care of Jimin, Taehyung and Jeongguk could be used as references, he likes to believe that he’s done a very well job at that. 

So when his sister had called the evening before Children’s day telling him he’s free to babysit his niece Daeun, Namjoon easily agrees. 

He instantly agreed that he’s forgotten his promise of a trip to the market with Yoongi. Since it’s a national holiday, everyone’s free for a day and Yoongi has long set a date for them to do some grocery shopping together because 1) Yoongi will make lunch for everyone because Seokjin had to go to Japan for a conference and 2) Namjoon’s given the duty in carrying the groceries. It’s also because Namjoon has insisted that they spend a day filtering the convenience stores for those pokemon bread and stickers. 

He’s been looking forward to this day if he’s going to be honest, but the thought of spending a day with Daeun had topped his previous plans and he only remembered all of it when Yoongi comes knocking to his front door that morning. 

“I didn’t expect you to be ready so early,” Yoongi says, amused. He’s wearing a massive yellow hoodie and tight jeans. Yoongi looks food in anything but Namjoon likes it best when Yoongi looks soft and casual like this, tiny and relaxed. 

He’s wearing a white loose shirt and blue-washed jeans. He’s still brushing his teeth when he opened the door and Yoongi pushes him down the hall after toeing off his shoes. Yoongi has have Namjoon’s apartment memorized, so it’s only natural that he turns left, opposite to where Namjoon is headed, and helps himself in the kitchen. 

“I hope you’re ready, the convenience store in my block is already sold out and it’s only 8 AM,” Yoongi laughs, opening the cupboards and checking for the stock of food left in Namjoon’s kitchen. 

Namjoon winces. He turns off the tap and gives himself one last glance in the mirror. He smiles weakly as if scolding himself for forgetting what he’s promised the elder. He knows Yoongi wouldn’t take it against him, wouldn’t be crossed with him because Yoongi understands. But it’s always so hard to just, drop something like that. He knows Yoongi won’t be mad but there’s no denying that he’s mad at himself. 

Grabbing his bag and his coat from his bedroom, he marches down to the kitchen and sees Yoongi scanning the insides of his fridge. 

“I know you love them, but please finish this choco bread already or I am going to have to throw this away,” the elder grumbles behind the door of the fridge. Namjoon gingerly places his bag and his coat on the kitchen island and organizes his thoughts. 

Yoongi stands up fully and shuts the door close. He turns around and Namjoon sees the concern laced in the elder’s gaze.

“What’s wrong?”

Namjoon internally winces at how worried Yoongi’s voice is. 

“Hyung,” Namjoon says, and instantly regrets how his voice cracked and hoarse. 

Yoongi approaches him, eyes wide and inquiring. “Tell, hyung. What’s wrong?”

It’s funny how someone so tall could look so tiny under Yoongi’s gaze. Namjoon has always given Yoongi that power over him, present, enrapturing, caring. There’s a huge size difference between them, but when Namjoon feels like he’s had enough playing the role of the big and mature person, Yoongi catches him instantly, letting him just be himself.

His addiction to collecting Pokemon stickers wasn’t a secret among his friends, even his students had learned about this sudden hoarding. But Namjoon had received teasing and playful remarks that sometimes made him feel like what he was doing is stupid. 

Yoongi had told him that it was not. Namjoon had believed him. 

The younger will always believe him. So he heaves a shaky breath and chuckles robotically at the elder. 

“I sort of agreed with Kyungmin to join them for Children’s Day,” Namjoon fidgets, brows furrowed with worry. He’s staring at Yoongi, though, wants to see his reaction. He knows Yoongi will feel sad about the sudden change of plans. His heart sinks in his gut again when instead of the pout Yoongi would usually make when displeased, the elder only shows off his gums in a wild smile.

“You’re going to spend your time with Daeun-ah. That’s actually a nice way to spend your holiday!”

Namjoon is mad at himself for even thinking that Yoongi will get sad about things like this. He’s truly stupid. 

“You’re not mad?”

Yoongi chuckles and rolls his eyes. He scrunches his face playfully and puckers his lips in a teasing pout. Akin to a Pysduck. The last wrapper of Pokemon bread he’d eaten had a Psyduck print on the wrapper, hence the comparison. 

“Why would I be mad?”

“I promised to spend the day with you, that’s why.”

“We spend time together every single day, consider this a vacation away from me,” Yoongi laughs.

But see, Namjoon doesn't want to spend a day not being with him. 

Yoongi offered to drive Namjoon to Kyungmin’s house even though Namjoon refused profusely. Once they reach the front door of his sister’s apartment, Yoongi’s ready to bid goodbye as soon as he greets Daeun. However, the moment the door opens, plans are stirred change, yet again. 

Daeun bolted out of the room, her tiny 4-year-old figure latching at Namjoon and Yoongi’s legs like a koala. She wasn’t crying but her hold was tight around their legs and Yoongi blinks at Namjoon before looking inside the house. 

“Oppa, there you are—oh, Yoongi-oppa, thank goodness you’re here,” Kyungmin greets. Namjoon ruffles Daeun’s hair and grins at her when she looks up and tucks her chin on his knee. She sees Daeun grinning at Yoongi as well and it makes a soft pitter-patter thump in his heart at the way Yoongi beams back. 

“Uncle Namu! Uncle Yoon!” Daeun says with a loud chirp. She lets go of their legs and isn’t even surprised when Daeun stretched her arms for Yoongi to pick her up. 

Yoongi has long found a permanent place in Namjoon’s family, including little Daeun. 

“Change of plans,” Kyungmin says apologetically, leading them to the living room. Namjoon guides Yoongi who’s now carrying Daeun inside, his hand at the small of Yoongi’s back, careful and grounding. He knows the act should ground Yoongi but right now it grounds Namjoon and he almost misses the way he’s held Yoongi once the elder settles on the floor. Daeun doesn’t let go, however, and occupies the space between Yoongi’s crossed legs and starts showing him her toys. 

“Donghyun and I need to go to the hospital,” Kyungmin explains with a loud voice as she swarms back into the master bedroom. Namjoon stands in the middle of the hallway confused. 

“But I thought—” Namjoon muses, eyes fleeting down the hall and to his best friend and niece playing on the living room floor. “Is everything alright?” He asks loudly, looking at the end of the hall. Kyungmin pops her head from the open door and beams at her brother. 

“I think we’re expecting,” she says, shutting the door close and walking back to the living room. Namjoon blinks at her and in instant pull her in a tight hug. Kyungmin smiles at Yoongi over Namjoon’s shoulder and pulls away.

“Since when? Does mum know?”

Kyungmin only giggles and swats at his arm lightly. “I am not yet sure, but I missed my period two months now and I’ve been feeling nauseous all the time.”

Namjoon nods immediately and sees Yoongi beaming at them while trying his best to listen to Daeun tell about her plushie collection. Kyungmin puts on her coat and leans down to press a kiss on Daeun’s head. 

“We’d love to take Daeun but we’re not sure if she can last a day in the hospital. This is sudden and haven’t set an appointment so we might need to stay for a while.”

“Do you need a ride to the hospital? I could drive you there,” Yoongi offers but Kyungmin only shakes her head.

“I need you here Yoongi-oppa,” Kyungmin announces. “We both know Joon-oppa is a kid himself. It’s a good thing you’re here.”

“ Ai ,” Namjoon grumbles at the other side of the room. Yoongi chuckles at the statement and Kyungmin joins him before getting up on her feet and grabbing her bag. 

“Please be good with your uncles, Daeun-ah,” Kyungmin says and Daeun nods affirmatively, giggling as she tucks her face against Yoongi’s neck. 

“If you can bring her to the Kid’s festival I’ll be truly grateful,” Kyungmin requests. “We don’t have anything planned today, only dinner later in the restaurant Donghyun had reserved, so whatever you decide for the day, I completely trust you,” she eyes at Yoongi, and the elder nods in assurance at her. She smiles at him warmly. “She might get cranky though so she needs her nap and please don’t give her too much sweets Namjoon-oppa.”

“I’m her uncle, don’t you trust me?”

Kyungmin glances at them one last time. “I don’t," she deadpans. She eyes Yoongi with a bright smile, "But I trust Yoongi-oppa and I know he’s way better in taking care of Daeun than you.”

“Yah!” Namjoon shouts but Kyungmin has already left the house.

At the end of the day, Namjoon got to spend it with Yoongi and together with Daeun they did grocery shopping, attended the Kid’s festival, and even went treasure hunting for Pokemon bread. 

Namjoon has also concluded that he wasn’t great with kids but it’s alright. 

Yoongi was there to guide help and Namjoon thinks it’s better this way. 

—

“Don’t,” Yoongi snarls and Namjoon flinches from where he’s sitting at. He’s just arrived at Yoongi’s office ten minutes ago. His appearance in the music department isn’t that surprising anymore. Yoongi’s colleagues - also his former professors - had long known that they are the best friends. They’re basically connected at the hip. 

Dr. Gwangboo had once mentioned that their partnership is admirable. Yoongi’s the tiny always growling music student while Namjoon was the always happy and so tall science boy. 

Hajoon, Yoongi’s TA takes a careful step back and hangs his head. Namjoon doesn’t know what happened but the way he’s slouching in his seat meant one thing. Hajoon had done something wrong. 

“I’m sorry, professor.”

This only confirms Namjoon’s theory and he almost pities the TA. 

Fall Semester started two weeks ago and Yoongi was assigned a TA as part of Hajoon’s completion load. Namjoon knows that Hajoon’s first task was to collate all materials Yoongi will be needing for his lectures and cross-check the class list. It’s a relatively small task so Namjoon’s curious what could make Yoongi lose his temper. 

“I can retrieve them back, I promise,” Hajoon tries again, fingers toying at the hem of his shirt. 

Yoongi only exhales heavily and shakes his head. Namjoon has an idea of what will spill from Yoongi’s lips the moment the elder starts talking so to save Hajoon from crying, he gets up from the couch and places a hand on Yoongi’s shoulder. 

“Why don’t we take five, hmm? Hajoon-ssi,” Namjoon speaks smoothly. He pulls out his ID from his back pocket and hands it to Hajoon. “Why don’t go grab us two iced americanos and a couple of hotteok from the cafe beside the library. Make sure to get something for yourself, too. My treat.”

Hajoon looks at Yoongi for confirmation. Namjoon squeezes Yoongi’s shoulder and the elder waves at Hajoon mindlessly. Quick on his feet, Hajoon escapes the room and shuts the door close. 

“Fuck,” Yoongi growls, pulling his arm away from the younger professor and rolling his seat in front of his computer. 

Namjoon blinks at the action but doesn’t voice it out. Yoongi likes to brood into himself when pissed and stressed. 

“I just said we’re taking a break, what do you think are you doing?”

Yoongi ignores him and Namjoon watches the mouse hover on the screen. There’s an open document, an open spreadsheet, and a music program Namjoon is all too familiar with. The elder clicks on one of the commands and grumbles to himself completely turned away from the younger. 

“Hyung,” Namjoon tries again. He clutches at the backrest of the chair and softly shakes it. 

“Go fucking away, Namjoon.”

Namjoon stares at his back calmly and tries again. 

“Yoongi, I think you need a screen break."

Yoongi lets go of the computer mouse to face Namjoon. He is still scowling but Namjoon can see tears threatening to fall. He’s so stressed and Namjoon feels bad for him. 

“I said, go away,” Yoongi says without a bite. “I won’t be driving you home. Ask Jin-hyung or Hoba. Just go away Joon-ah.”

It’s difficult to just let this go, leave the elder when he’s just addressed Namjoon with his nickname. So, being brave as he always is - with his actions - he pulls Yoongi off the chair and in one quick motion settles on the chair with the elder on his lap. 

“What’s gotten you so worked up?” He asks softly, wrapping an arm around the elder’s waist. He fixes Yoongi’s legs on one side and with his other arm, pulls the music professor against his chest. Yoongi instantly curls in on himself against the younger, pressing his face against Namjoon’s clavicle. 

“I’m so tired,” Yoongi sighs, fists on his lap. Namjoon rubs his back and nods in response. “And it’s only the beginning of the semester. The summer session was filled with so many makeup classes and there are a lot of students who changed programs. I am in no way close to finishing anything. And the demand never seems to stop.”

Namjoon doesn’t respond. He’s learned long ago never to give a reason when it comes to working. Yoongi had told him that he doesn’t want them fighting about work. Namjoon has a tendency to speak his mind, wants to give a reason. Namjoon had mentioned that he was simply offering help but soon realized Yoongi’s point. Yoongi knows what to do, he always does. He just needs to empty his cup and recharge. Namjoon reaches for the elder’s fists and uncurls his fingers. He holds his hands and tightens his embrace. 

Yoongi recharges best with his hands being held. And just as quickly, he fell asleep in Namjoon’s warm embrace.

After 10 minutes of just holding the elder in silence, Hajoon appears again. He’s carrying a bag of snacks and their drinks. He places the bag on the space at the end of the table and hands back Namjoon’s ID. Namjoon instructs him to retrieve the files he’s lost while he carries rolls his chair away from the desk. Hajoon nods quickly, pulling a spare stool and working on what he’s supposed to do. 

An hour later, Hajoon bids farewell and Namjoon nods at him, arms still around the elder who’s in deep slumber. Hajoon has informed him that he’s retrieved everything and that he’ll work on the files Yoongi will be needing at home since he has copies of the files.

“I’m sorry again, Professor Kim,” Hajoon says, hiking his bag on his shoulders. “And thank you for the treat. I’ll do better, I promise.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Namjoon assures the lanky student. “Professor Min’s just having those bad days. He didn’t mean to just dump it all to you. Be careful on your way home.”

Hajoon nods politely and bows before storming out of the room with careful steps. As soon as the door shut close, Namjoon feels Yoongi poke at his stomach.

“You didn’t have to do that,” Yoongi grumbles against his chest. Namjoon sits up straight and rubs Yoongi at the back of his neck. 

“So you’re awake,” Namjoon teases, squeezing Yoongi’s pale neck softly. “Feeling better?”

Yoongi doesn’t respond, instead, he pulls away and points at the snacks on his desk. Namjoon rolls his eyes with a smile. He pats Yoongi’s thigh telling him to get up. When Yoongi doesn’t move, Namjoon raises a brow at him. 

“How am I going to get our food then?”

“Roll us there,” Yoongi says petulantly and then smiles at the younger, albeit small. He rests his head on Namjoon’s shoulder and nuzzles his nose against the column of Namjoon’s throat. 

Yoongi fell asleep again after that. 

Namjoon did roll his chair closer to the desk and reached for his drink. He hums to himself, a hand on Yoongi’s back, patting him lovingly while scrolling on his phone in silence. His legs might be dead when Yoongi wakes up but it’s okay. Yoongi will drive him home anyway. He rather has a well-rested hyung behind the wheels than a grumpy cat trying to course through the traffic. He’ll willingly let his limbs die from the lack of circulation since it’s Yoongi—everything for him, always. 

It’s exclusive, whatever this is. He knows this is exclusive and Namjoon’s starting to like the idea of finally throwing caution to the wind. But the voice of negativity is strong, so he’ll just enjoy having the elder in his embrace. He’ll consider throwing caution to the wind. 

Not just yet. 

—

Jeongguk (Arts): how does it feel jimin-ssi?

Jeongguk (Arts): summer session my ass

Hoseok (Arts): kookie!

Seokjin (Business): language jeongguk-ah

Seokjin (Business): i am sure jimin’s busy moping ㅋㅋㅋ

Hoseok (Arts): you’re both mean

Taehyung (Arts): when do we consider that it’s past the beginning of the sem?

Hoseok (Arts): at least once we’re done with the first quarter

Hoseok (Arts): why?

Jimin (Education): ha! You’re only a week away

Jimin (Education): let’s see if either the two of you actually make a right guess >:/

Jeongguk (Arts): do you wanna fite me, jimin-ssi?

Jimin (Education): no one’s stopping you!

Seokjin (Business): dinner on my house next weekend!

Taehyung (Arts): yeay! food! Hyung don’t forget, lots of meat 

—

It is weird for Taehyung and Jeongguk to see Namjoon’s office door shut close when he’d usually leave it open after classes when they got outside the elder’s hallway. 

A closed office door in the afternoon meant one thing: I am not in the mood, go away . 

He had the same code back in his dorm room back in college. So everyone knows about this already. However, it’s also no secret that Namjoon’s the most patient and understanding man. He would grumble when everything was becoming too much but he wasn’t the type to just shut people away. Unlike Yoongi who would throw a fit almost instantly, Namjoon would stand back and weigh things first. He’ll organize his thoughts and just speak if necessary. Most of the time, he’ll just wave the issue away, knowing it’s not worth it. 

But Namjoon had only shut close his door once as a professor for everyone to see. And that had happened two years ago when Namjoon was given the role of a speaker in Ilsan and then another one in Singapore. It had been an opportunity but the pressure and the time constraint had piled badly that Namjoon simply shut everyone out. 

Jeongguk and Taehyung are expecting to see Yoongi inside the office because the only person who can calm Namjoon was Yoongi. Yoongi had been there when Namjoon was collating material after material for a back-to-back seminar. 

“Namjoon-hyung?”

To say that they were surprised was an understatement. 

One, Yoongi isn’t in the office. He’s not seated beside Namjoon, there’s no Yoongi who would make Namjoon listen to Epik High songs while he tries to make Namjoon laugh over chicken sandwiches. And two, Namjoon’s crying. So hard, full-on crying, fat tears creeping down his cheeks and shoulders shaking. 

Namjoon looks up at them and shakes his head. Namjoon doesn't want to talk about it, so instead, he reaches for the handkerchief in his pocket. However, upon seeing the handkerchief, it only made him cry harder. 

Taehyung is quick to approach the elder and pull him into a hug. Jeongguk shuts the door close and pulls the spare plastic chairs so they can sit on either side of the crying professor. 

Namjoon stares at the handkerchief before he throws it away and reaches for the tissue box behind the computer screen. Jeongguk helps him after Namjoon almost knocks on the screen. Taehyung lets out a breathy laugh, hoping it’ll ease the tension in the room. 

“What happened, hyung?” Jeongguk asks, handing the tissue paper to the elder. Namjoon thankfully takes it and wipes his tears away. 

“I look stupid,” Namjoon says with a laugh, choking at his own spit, and Taehyung scans the desk in search of his water bottle. He spots it beside Namjoon’s lunchbox from the cubby at the back and hands it to the elder. 

“You? Stupid? Never!” 

Namjoon looks at Jeongguk who was already pouting at him. It made the elder smile. He sniffles a bit and takes a sip of the water. Once, replenished, he taps Taehyung’s forearm, telling him to let go and he sinks back in his seat. 

“Do you want to tell us what’s wrong?” Taehyung asks, carefully, pulling his Namjoon’s attention to him. Jeongguk has pulled out his phone a couple of minutes ago, sending his hyungs about Namjoon.

Jeongguk (Arts): is anyone still in uni?

Hoseok (Arts): i already left to start with our dinner, what’s up?

Hoseok (Arts): you’ll eat at home, right? Both you and taehyung?

Hoseok (Arts): i swear if you two don’t say yes

Jeongguk (Arts): chill hyung!

Jeongguk (Arts): we’ll have dinner at home omg chill

Seokjin (Business): joonie’s still in his office, kookie?

Jeongguk (Arts): yes, hyung and he’s crying

Hoseok (Arts): WHAT HAPPENED??

Jimin (Education): why is hyung crying?? Is he okay?? 

Jimin (Education): I hate being away from everyone :< stupid conference

Jeongguk (Arts): we really don’t know

Hoseok (Arts): shouldnt yoongi be there with him if he’s stressed??

Jimin (Education): where is yoongi hyung? Is he still in class?

Jeongguk (Arts): idkkkkkk

Seokjin (Business): for the record, yoongiya’s crying too

Hoseok (Arts): WHAT IS HAPPENING???

Jimin (Education): oh no! I should be there, i give the best hugs!

Jeongguk (Arts): joon-hyung won’t talk tho

Jeongguk (Arts): jin-hyung, did they fight??

Hoseok (Arts): omfg, this is a serious fight

Hoseok (Arts): they never fought this bad since high school!

Hoseok (Arts): what is happening???

When Yoongi and Namjoon had their first and only serious fight, it was back in high school. They were paired in a Science project and Yoongi was the cause of it. Hoseok did his best to clear the air between them but Science was Namjoon’s favorite subject and he did his best to excel on it. He had thought working with his best friend was going to make his life easier, but he had guessed wrong. 

“We got a 76,” Namjoon had said in disgust. “We got a Mi , of all grades! It’s my first time getting an average score.”

Yoongi had scowled back and placed his pen on the cafeteria desk loudly. 

“It’s still a grade,” Yoongi had scowled. “What’s the big deal?”

Namjoon had only glared. “That’s why you’re a repeater, you don’t know anything about science.”

Hoseok had seen it coming but he was still surprised when Yoongi had thrown his empty plastic bowl of soup on Namjoon. It almost had hit Namjoon on the face but Yoongi had made sure to only scare him. The way Namjoon had looked at him with wide eyes was a confirmation to Hoseok that he got scared. 

They made amends the next day. After that, all fighting had just been out of simple bickering and riling up. One annoyed the other on accident, in most cases, and one teased the other far too much. That was it. No more serious fights had erupted.

Hoseok had been right when they never fought after that. Namjoon didn’t quite enjoy the feeling of being on bad terms with his best friend. But he wouldn’t just let this pass. 

The tension began after his first class, which ended at 1 PM. 

It had been a wonderful morning because Namjoon saw a paper bag with his new potted plant. It’s already late, but Namjoon loves it still. It’s a pink champagne succulent, to celebrate the color of summer. He’d set it beside the other potted plants and had continued on his day. 

Originally, he has a 30-minute break before his next class and that break time was allotted for a quick meal. However, the moment he had stepped out of the classroom, a colleague from the Math department asked for his help for an ongoing presentation. He instantly agreed since he didn’t see any harm in it. 

At 1:30, he had trudged to his next class and for the next three hours, gave his lecture. By the time he’d stepped out, his phone had rung. There’s no denying that he’d gone famished by the time he walked down the hallway toward his office but hunger was long forgotten when he heard the caller speak on the phone. 

Min Yoongi was lecturing him and Namjoon’s exhausted from the events of the previous days, and lack of food. He was certainly not in the mood but he let the elder speak as he take hurried steps to his office. 

Once inside, he shut the door close and blinked at the lunchbox. It’s his but also not his. It's not his usual brown lunch box that comes from Seokjin. It’s blue and bigger. He wondered if Seokjin has changed his container. He furrowed his brow and unzipped the bag. He blinked at the glass container, surprised. It’s not Seokjin’s usual prepared meals. It’s different. 

Namjoon heard Yoongi shout and Namjoon responded coldly. 

“What the fuck, hyung? I was listening and was letting you talk. I didn’t want to cut you off. Don’t fucking shout at me?”

He listened in silence when Yoongi exhaled deeply. He waited for the elder to say something only to blink when the call ended. Yoongi had just dropped the call. Namjoon breathes in heavily, fingers trembling. 

It could be his hunger, his mood, or Yoongi’s idiotic way of handling that he pulled out his messaging app and send the elder a message. 

To Yoongi-hyung: I don’t know what your problem is but i had a long day. And i need to get ready for a conference in Gwangju on friday so don’t fucking wait for me. I can go and take the bus. 

To Yoongi-hyung: isn’t that what you want anyway? Fuck you, yoongi. Who do you think you are that you can just shout at me

To Yoongi-hyung: i hate you

To Yoongi-hyung: what did i even do wrong? 

To Yoongi-hyung: fine don’t reply. 

Namjoon placed his phone on the desk and rounded the desk so he can sit down. He glared at his phone before he pulled the lunchbox closer. As soon as he had the first bite of his meal, he let out a cry. 

He was midway done with his meal when his food vibrated on his desk. When he went to check the message, he placed the chopsticks on the lid of his lunch tray and tried not to choke. 

From Yoongi-hyung: hate me all you want then, fucker. just make sure you finish your food. Hajoon will bring in the snacks and the side dishes i’ve prepared later. 

“So you were fighting over food?” Taehyung asks, eyeing the lunchbox and then looking at the wrapped sandwiches and rice rolls in the paper bag on the floor. 

“We fought because I was stupid,” Namjoon laughs. “I told him I hate him.”

Jeongguk’s eyes went wide, almost leaving its sockets and Taehyung pouts at the elder. 

“You don’t mean that,” Taehyung says. Namjoon nods, agreeing. He doesn’t mean it and he’s so sorry but Yoongi hasn’t called for more than two hours now. He tried calling but he was weak so instead, he agonizingly worked on his presentation and tried his best to stay focused. It was successful since he got too focused that he managed to finish his presentation but he wouldn’t be denied that he kept on looking at his phone, waiting for Yoongi’s text. 

Jeongguk leans to his side and perches his chin on Namjoon’s shoulder. “I am sure you’ll—”

The door creaks open and three pairs of eyes look at Yoongi who has his bag on his back. Namjoon stares at him and feels his eyes tearing up again because Yoongi looks pink, his nose most especially, and he feels bad for getting mad at the elder. The beaten and tired look on Yoongi's face is enough to shatter his heart into billion pieces. It's worse than being rejected, he thinks. 

God, he’s so stupid. 

“Let’s go home,” Yoongi croaks, and Namjoon almost winces at how hoarse his voice sounded.

This was enough cue for the youngest professors to get up on their feet and bid farewell. Namjoon is thankful for that. Yoongi stands before his desk and Namjoon quietly pulls out his bag, the lunchbox, and the paper bags. He puts on his coat and even before he could reach for the paper bag, the elder beats him to it. 

The walk to the parking lot is quiet and full with so much unspoken apology. Namjoon hates having this air between them, loathes it. He suddenly remembers how bad he had felt when they had their only serious fight. 

When Yoongi clicks the lock of the car in his key, Namjoon stops in his tracks and clears his throat. 

“I’m sorry, hyung,” Namjoon says, facing Yoongi’s back. He sees the elder standing up straight and Namjoon continues talking. 

“I am sorry for shouting at you and for getting mad. I don’t hate you,” the younger says, trying his best not to cry. He’s a proper 6-foot adult, who can pay his bills, be matured-–he’s not going to cry. 

“And I love your meal, thank you for cooking them for me.”

Namjoon stares when Yoongi opens the door to the passenger seat. The elder turns to face him, eyes teary but gummy smile wide and just so bright.

“I don’t like fighting with you, Joon-ah,” he says. He tilts his head, telling to Namjoon to get in and the younger finally smiles. 

“No more fights, hyung,” Namjoon agrees. 

—

Seokjin (Business): dinner in my house this weekend! 

Hoseok (Arts): i need the best food for losing another year

Jeongguk (Arts): me too

Taehyung (Arts): i told you i can feel it, this is my year

Jimin (Education): i am praying that they don’t together this year

Jeongguk (Arts): i agree, i want that jeju trip

Hoseok (Arts): please no more pining year 12

Taehyung (Arts): i really thought they wont fix it

Seokjin (Business): yoongi loves joonie too much.

Jeongguk (Arts): but he aint brave enough to confess smh

—

Namjoon beams when the autumn breeze that grazed at his face the moment he’s stepped out of his apartment complex. It’s still early before their supposed dinner at Seokjin’s house but he likes waking up early when it’s autumn. It’s cold and the sun isn’t that strong.

Before sending him home last night, Yoongi informed him that he’d planned something only for the two of them. It sounded so exclusive and Namjoon grinned happily when Yoongi pushed him away when he had what was it about. 

He really doesn’t have any idea what the elder has planned but he’s happy to just bask into the autumn breeze. And maybe likes the idea of being spoiled after being away for so long. (It’s only five days, but still, so looooong).

He hears Yoongi’s shouting his name from inside the car. The man looks so excited that he can’t but grin back just as wide. He fixes his bag on his shoulder and approaches the vehicle. 

It was a relatively quiet and comforting ride. Namjoon doesn’t remember a time they had chatted so much when inside a moving vehicle. They don’t really talk a lot, simply enjoying the serenity of having each other’s company in full silence. Namjoon thinks he likes this type of company anyway. There’s no pressure in stirring up a conversation but at the same time, both will willingly listen when one decides to talk. 

Namjoon doesn’t know what to expect if he’s being honest. At first, he thought that Yoongi only needed company for his own groceries since that’s mostly the reason why they go out on weekends together. So it really was a surprise when Yoongi parks in his usual parking space at Seoul National University. 

“Please don’t tell me we’re going to work on a Saturday?”

“Of course not,” Yoongi says with a soft snort. “Come on, we need to get tickets for the train.”

“What train?” Namjoon asks, confused and slightly worried. “Yoongi? What?”

Yoongi is already out of the car before Namjoon could unbuckle his seatbelt. “Come on!” He shouts from the hood and Namjoon quickly steps out of the car and follows the elder after Yoongi locked the doors. 

The last time he’s been on a train was when he went home to Daegu to visit Yoongi’s family two months ago. It was Chuseok. He usually spends Chuseok with Yoongi’s family and spends Christmas with his family. It wasn’t a long time ago but there’s always a different excitement having to spend a long train ride with the elder. 

He sits beside the window, his usual spot, and Yoongi settles beside him, form already curled against him, head on his shoulder. They’ve just devoured rice balls Yoongi had packed and Namjoon’s just nursing a warm cup of canned coffee while admiring the scenery outside. 

Yoongi still hasn’t spilled where they are going but he thinks the thrill of not knowing where to go makes it more fun. Yoongi has always been good at keeping surprises anyway, so he doesn’t ask.

Namjoon likes Autumn the best. It has a different joy to it. He’s always adored watching them leave turn from green to gold, orange, and red. The colors were bright and comforting in his eyes. 

Like Yoongi. 

The man who has just dozed off 20 minutes ago on his shoulder. The man who makes his day brighter and brighter with each passing day. The man who makes him get braver and brave by the minute, dismissing any negative thoughts in his head. 

Min Yoongi. 

The man with who he’s certain he wants to spend his eternity. 

He is still mustering all the courage he can get just so he can confess. He might need a manual on how to do it but for now, he’s more than settled on playing at the man’s fingers on his lap, keeping it warm in his palms and the hot can of coffee. 

Yoongi wakes up when they reach Anguk Station, after an hour of traveling. He smiles at the younger as soon as they exit the platform and Namjoon?

Namjoon wishes he’s brave enough to pull the elder into his space and kiss him silly because Min Yoongi is not real. 

He’s brought him to Samcheongdong. Namjoon’s favorite place to go to when he wishes to relax and unwind. The place is filled with so many vintage and antique stores, hole inthe wall cafes, and shops that sell the unique and best driftwood furniture.

Samcheongdong is also the best place to go to during Autumn. Red, orange, and yellow maple leaves are scattered on the bricked road. As cliche as it sounds, Namjoon has fallen in love with fall.

“It’s been so long, hyung, damn,” Namjoon says with a giggle as they walk side by side down the path. He scans the place excitedly and tries to recall the shops they’ve been to years back. 

“It is, isn’t it? I’d bring you to Nami Island but Jin-hyung’s looking forward to this month’s dinner.”

“We can go to Nami Island some other time. It’s alright,” the younger replies, moving closer to Yoongi when they bump into a bigger group of travelers. Yoongi pulls him by the elbow and points at the art gallery just three stores away.

Namjoon agrees easily. He likes going to galleries and he likes it best when Yoongi’s beside him. 

They spent an entire hour admiring the paintings, sharing inputs once in a while. Yoongi has stopped him a lot of times from purchasing a massive painting of a pathway of ginkgo trees, reminding him with a growl that it’s hard to commute carrying a heavy framed canvas. Namjoon gives in, finding logic in the elder’s reasoning but he did mope for some time. Yoongi promised him that they’ll go back and he can purchase all the paintings next time. He’ll even rent a truck just so they can hoard everything Namjoon wants. 

It’s silly, but Namjoon likes it best when Yoongi’s being silly. 

After the trip to the art gallery, Namjoon points out a traditional restaurant that was relatively quiet. They spent lunch time devouring delicacies best served in autumn and shared a bowl of persimmon ice cream. (Yoongi had insisted on getting crabs just to tease the younger. It’s in season, Joon-ah. But Namjoon had rolled his eyes and had kicked the elder playfully, How dare you.)

“I still don’t understand why, Namjoon, why,” Yoongi groans dramatically. 

Instead of lurking from different antique stores, Namjoon pulls the elder inside the first convenience store he had spotted. 

“Because,” Namjoon shushes, scanning the shelves rigorously. 

“We already have two bread,” Yoongi shakes the shopping basket. “And I thought you told me you’re already full from what we ate.”

“I must seize every opportunity I can get, hyung. You don’t understand. Oh, there’s really nothing in the back. Okay, let’s pay for that and head to the next one.”

“I didn’t bring you here just so you can hunt for Pokemon bread,” Yoongi whines but he’s going to the cash register and pays for the two chocolate bread. As soon as he’s handed the bag, Namjoon quickly pulls him out of the store.

The next hour was spent with them going to 8 convenience stores in search of all the Pokemon bread Namjoon could get. Yoongi kept on whining but Namjoon always finds himself chuckling because no matter how much he had whined, it was the elder who paid for all 23 Pokemon bread. Namjoon was certain that the elder would pay for more had he asked to check the next convenience stores on the other side of the block but for now, he thinks this is enough. 

“What are you going to do with 23 Pokemon bread. You’re so silly,” Yoongi says as they walk towards the park where they can the trees better. 

“Eat them while I prepare for the last quarter this semester and my presentation for the Freshmen career talk,” Namjoon explains, already starting with his first Pokemon bread of the day. He turns the package to let the sticker slip and whines. The elder glances at him, brow quirked up high.

“It’s another Pikachu,” Namjoon complains. “I already have 4 of this.”

Yoongi chuckles and bumps Namjoon’s arm with his elbow. “How many stickers are there again?”

“One hundred and fifty-one,” Namjoon replies. He takes a bite of the chocolate bread and hands it to the elder. Yoongi reaches for it and takes a bite as well. Namjoon peels off the sticker from the glossy paper and then pulls Yoongi who’s a few steps ahead of him. When the elder turns to face him, Namjoon sticks Pikachu on the lapel of Yoongi’s long coat. 

He grins at Yoongi and snatches the bread off of his hand. He crinkles his eyes at Yoongi and then starts walking ahead. 

“What’s this for?” Yoongi grumbles following him. 

“I caught you,” Namjoon says simply, eyes already wide at the beautiful throng of orange, red and yellow leaves.

“What?”

“You’re mine now,” Namjoon absentmindedly says, attention focused on the view before him. “Oh, hyung! Look! Let’s go to that maple tree. It’s the biggest out there!”

Namjoon is too busy admiring the trees in the park that he didn’t see how red Yoongi’s face is. He didn’t realize what he had just said. 

They spent 30 minutes walking around the park, admiring the different sizes of the maple trees. Namjoon had even asked Yoongi to take a photo of him hugging one of the tree trunks. Namjoon was in his element. It’s the dendrophile and the nemophila in him, soaring high as he explained one by one the differences of the trees and the leaves and their growth rate. Yoongi listened to all of them, even opted to open a few Pokemon bread to snack on and see what sticker they got. 

Namjoon would frown when some of the stickers were just a duplicate of what he had at home. Instead of keeping it, he just peeled it off and stick it on Yoongi’s coat. When Namjoon had enough of the bread (they ate five and a half) he checked the time and told Yoongi that they should head back to the campus. 

On their way back to the station, Namjoon is pulled at the flower shop just across the platform. 

“I still haven’t gotten you a potted plant this semester,” Yoongi tells him. Namjoon snorts and pokes at the Charmander sticker on his coat. 

“My office has already turned into a forest, and you’ve spent a lot for me today, hyung. I think not receiving a potted plant from you this semester is fine.”

Yoongi only scowls and whacks his forearm. 

“Go find a plant, please. I owe you two,” Yoongi says, turning around and glancing at the flowers on the rack beside the glass window. 

Namjoon chuckles and obeys, knowing that Yoongi will turn savage and kick him again if he refuses. He walks past the succulent and indoor plants. He’s had enough of those and getting a snake plant would be difficult to carry. Getting another bonsai sounds appealing but like his issue with the snake plant, it’s going to be heavy so he walks deeper down the store. 

And then he spots it. 

The tiniest plum blossom behind the bigger pots on the rack. The flower hasn’t bloomed yet, but the bud is already showing, almost ready to bloom in full. He smiles to himself, already having a place in his head where to set the pot. Without a second thought, he grabs the tiny plum blossom carefully and smiles at the plant. 

“What are we getting?” Yoongi asks. Namjoon almost drops the plant so he brings it closer to his chest.

“Fuck, you scared me,” Namjoon curses. He glares at the elder who’s looking up at him with a wide gummy smile. 

He points at the small sign before them and Namjoon huffs at the elder.

You break it, you pay for it . 

“I won’t pay for it if you drop it,” Yoongi teases. Namjoon scrunches his nose and growls at him.

“And if I break your face?”

Yoongi glares back and stomps his foot on the ground. “After everything I’ve done, you ungrateful brat.”

Namjoon chuckles and walks away, pulling the elder with him. 

“Oh, are we only getting one plant? But I owe you two? One for this semester and the other for the conference you did so well in Gwangju.”

“This plant is more than enough,” Namjoon silences the elder and places the plant on the counter.

“Why did you get it? What does it mean?”

Namjoon blinks at the question and stares at Yoongi, dumbfounded. All of a sudden, Hoseok’s words ring in his ears.

Now that makes symbolism worthy of living. I am sure Yoongi-hyung knows the meaning of each plant he gets you.

See the thing is, he’s curious if Yoongi knows the meaning behind all the plants he’s been getting him. He’s very hopeful that he does but at the same doesn’t want to fully put faith in it. He doesn’t want to get broken. And yet—

He can hear his gears running in his head, the sound of his heart thumping all over him. Yoongi’s question gives him a better chance that this exclusive connection between them could really mean something else.

I got them because the plum blossom reminded me of you, my persevering hyung.

“That’s a cute sticker,” Seokjin greets, opening the door widely. Namjoon is leaning on Yoongi’s back, his chin on the crown of Yoongi’s head and arms around the elder’s waist. “That’s also a cute way to wait outside my house.”

Namjoon grins before letting out a wide yawn, arms loosening around Yoongi’s waist.

“Oh, and what is this? Tired already?”

“We had a long day,” Yoongi replies, stepping inside and toeing his shoes off. Seokjin only grins at them and asks Namjoon to kip in the guest room. He tells Yoongi that he needs help in the kitchen while they wait for the rest. 

—-

Seokjin (Business): i can feel love sprining anytime soon

Jimin (Education): hyung, bring me with you in Jeju!!!

Jeongguk (Arts): just because yoongi has pikachu, charmander and balbausar on his coat it already means something >:[

Taehyung (Arts): winter sessions is just around the corner

Hoseok (Arts): fuck they were so terrible to look at last Saturday

Seokjin (Business): i can feel love blossoming soon!!

Jeongguk (Arts): i will fite with jimin-ssi for that position. Hyung take me with you!

—

Namjoon arrives in his office looking pale. 

When he’s just stepped out of his apartment complex, Donghyun was running toward him. He’d asked what was wrong but Donghyun had only pulled him in the passenger seat.

“Kyungmin’s in labor,” Donghyun had explained, buckling his seatbelt. Namjoon had looked back and saw his sister sweating bucket loads. 

“The baby’s early a couple of days than planned and we couldn’t contact any sitter—”

“Are you okay?” Namjoon had asked Kyungmin who just smiled and reached out a hand. Namjoon had taken it and squeezed it lightly. 

“I’m sorry oppa, but someone must watch Daeun.”

Namjoon had agreed resolutely. He’d said yes instantly, Daeun’s claps and peals of laughter making him forget that today is the day he’s going to hold an entire day Freshmen Career Talk. He’d said yes because if there’s anything he could do to help his sister, he’ll do it in a heartbeat. 

But now, with Daeun in his arms, his baby bag, and his own bag on his opposite shoulder, he wants to cry. He always thought he was great with kids but now. 

“Fu–dge,” Namjoon sighs, akin to crying already and it’s only 7:46 AM. 

“Uncle Namu, plant,” Daeun points at the bonsai plant on the corner of his room. 

“Yes, baby, plant,” Namjoon replies, approaching his desk and placing his bags on top of it. He hugs Daeun, breathing in the soft baby scent to calm himself. He doesn’t know who to ask. He thought of Jimin since Jimin’s great with kids but Jimin is out observing the pre-service teachers in the high school outside the campus so that’s a no. the Liberal Arts department is out on a field trip so all three professors are also a no. Seokjin’s with the dean on a trip to Indonesia so, also, a no. 

He whines again and holds Daeun tightly. The little girl, oblivious of her uncle’s dilemma simply hugs him back and babbles against his neck. 

“Fudge,” Namjoon croaks, turning around so he can lean at the edge of the desk and breathe in deeply. 

He’s still thinking deeply, considering and making proposals when the door of his office creaks open. 

“Uncle Yoon!”

“Oh,” Yoongi says, blinking at the duo. Namjoon freezes on his spot, admiring the baby blue and pink sweater and white pants. He’s always so ethereal and it’s his first time seeing Yoongi dress so differently. Different, but still so beautiful. He’s smiling at the elder who’s carrying their breakfast and his lunchbox, the blue lunchbox with a bigger container and better food (it’s something he keeps from Seokjin). But the smile vanishes instantly when Daeun slaps his chest.

“Ow,” Namjoon groans. Yoongi shuts the door close and places his things on the other side of the desk. 

“What is my lovely Daeun doing here?” Yoongi asks, eyeing Namjoon carefully and opening his arms. This made the little girl chirp happily, kicks hitting her uncle’s stomach. Yoongi quickly pulls her away from Namjoon’s arms and places her in his arm.

“Baby coming home,” Daeun giggles, her tiny hands on Yoongi’s shoulders. Namjoon smiles brokenly at the elder and bites his lower lip in frustration. 

“Is that so? You’re going to be a big sister. Wow, Daeun-ah!”

“Yes, uncle Yoon!” Daeun agrees, completely unaware of her uncle’s greatest crisis. Yoongi pulls Namjoon’s swivel chair and places Daeun in it. He pulls it close to him at the end of the desk. He takes one spare chair and pats it for Namjoon to sit on. 

“Let’s eat breakfast, first?” He announces, cutting Namjoon from his thoughts. Namjoon huffs but obeys and takes the iced coffee sadly. 

Yoongi pulls another chair and sits on Daeun’s other side. He pulls out an egg bread and hands it to Namjoon. He takes another egg bread and gives a quarter of a piece to Daeun. Daeun mumbles a soft thanks and starts munching on it, feet flapping happily at the end of the seat. 

“I’ll take care of Daeun for the day,” Yoongi finally says and Namjoon breaks his gaze off the floor to look at the elder with wide eyes. 

“Hyung,” Namjoon whispers. “But you have class.”

Yoongi shakes his head. “You’ll be taking my class for the day, so nope. And it means I can take care of little Daeun.” Namjoon stares at how the elder pulls out his handkerchief, the same handkerchief he’d thrown the last time he’d cried after he’d told Yoongi that he hated him. He stares at how Yoongi wipes the crumbs off Daeun’s lips off softly, babbling at his niece playfully. He stares at how Yoongi reaches for the baby bag and pulls out her sippy cup, helping her drink. 

His worries flew off for a second and he can’t help but just focus on how his heart thumps heavily, full of love, fond and endearment. 

“Are you sure?”

Yoongi places the sippy cup on his desk and looks at Namjoon, smiling brightly and nodding. 

“We’ll be staying in my office mostly, or I can tour her around uni and convince her that the best program in the entire world is Music.”

“But—Yoongs,” Namjoon whines. He’s been whining a lot and it’s only 8 in the morning. God, he’s such a wreck. 

“But I can handle her better than you can,” Yoongi counters, handing Daeun another piece of the egg bread and pulling the baby bag on his lap. Namjoon watches as he unzips the baby bag and inspects the bag. 

“I’ve got everything I need. Oh, I’ll just get her some baby food in the delivery app,” Yoongi assures him. 

“Yoongs,” Namjoon tries again, hand tight around the cup and uneaten bread. Yoongi glares at him and points at the bread. 

“What?”

“But this is too much,” Namjoon says. “I can look for a sitter. No, I will look for a sitter.”

Yoongi lifts a hand to stop him from talking. “Daeun wouldn’t be here if Kyungmin had already found a sitter, Joon-ah. I can take care of her, it’s perfectly fine.”

Namjoon sighs, knowing that Yoongi’s right. Dohyun had mentioned that they had tried a couple of times but sudden requests at 6 AM were futile. 

“But she has nap time and she needs to play and—”

“And I’ve been with her ever since she’s been born. We even spent Children’s Day together, remember?”

“Festival, uncle Namu,” Daeun pipes up. She giggles when Yoongi ruffles her hair. 

“See? Even Daeun remembers,” Yoongi says teasingly. He leans closer and wraps his fingers around Namjoon’s wrist. “We’ll be fine. You need to focus on what’s your priority for today and that’s the Career Talk. You need to focus on this, Joon-ah. I’ll take care of Daeun, yeah?”

Daeun is humming softly on her seat. “We’ll be fine, uncle Namu.”

“We’re going to be fine, aren’t we, baby?”

Namjoon gives up but he smiles at the elder softly and shows his dimples when Yoongi tightens his hold around his wrist. 

—

He’s presented the same slideshow twice and once he’s done he pulls out his phone, checking if Yoongi has sent him any messages. He phoned the elder during lunchtime and was relieved to know that Daeun didn’t create any fuss. Yoongi told him that she’d eaten all her greens and even finished her barley tea. Namjoon felt like crying because Kyungmin had complained a lot of times about how much Daeun hated barley tea. 

Dohyun had sent him a message earlier telling them that Kyungmin’s still in labor but he’s got nothing to worry about. Dohyun had also told him that he’ll call him as soon as Kyungmin’s done or they can simply visit as soon as classes have ended. Namjoon had responded that they’ll drop Daeun instead and that he should focus on Kyungmin. Dohyun had promised to treat him and Yoongi to dinner once the baby is born. 

He is already on his way to his office to collect his things when he receives a message from the assistant dean, informing everyone in the Science department of an emergency meeting in the next thirty minutes.

Namjoon is close to breaking the first desk he sees by choice. He tries to calm his breathing and scans for Yoongi’s contact in his messaging app. 

To Yoongi-hyung: how are you hyung?

From Yoongi-hyung: we’re perfectly fine, are you done with the career talk?

To Yoongi-hyung: yes

To Yoongi-hyung: I can't meet you yet. Dept meeting in 30. Might last an hour. I’m so sorry

From Yoongi-hyung: we’re fine joon. Just drop by my office once you’re done.

From Yoongi-hyung: calm down. And be safe. 

Namjoon smiles at the last text and can’t help but feel lucky.

God, he’s so lucky. 

An hour later, Namjoon finds himself standing in Yoongi’s empty office. He places his bag beside Yoongi’s on his desk and searches for the baby bag. He even checks the cubby against the wall but didn’t find it. 

He pulls his phone to check if Yoongi has said anything but sees their conversation from before. He steps out of the office and decides to walk down the hall leading to the music studios. All of the studios are empty so he climbs the steps and scans the classrooms. He sees one Jieun, one of Yoongi’s colleagues, a voice major in one of the classrooms. She nods at him and continues with her lecture. 

He continues to walk down the hall, not even surprised that classes are still going on. He looks at his watch and sees that there are still 30 minutes left before the classes end. 

He’s almost close to giving up, and still checking his phone when he sees Hajoon walking from the other end of the hallway.

“Professor Kim!”

“Park Hajoon,” Namjoon greets, eyes still wandering around the classrooms. 

When Yoongi’s TA reaches him, he smiles at him. Namjoon sees him holding a bag of two iced coffees and a bottle of banana milk. He also spots a bag of sesame mochi balls and looks up at Hajoon.

“Oh,” Hajoon says, pulling out one cup and handing it to Namjoon. “I’ve volunteered on buying Professor Min snacks. He also asked me to get yours.”

Namjoon smiles thankfully but he’s too concerned for his missing…best friend and niece to smile fully. 

“Are you looking for Professor Min?”

Namjoon nods dumbly worry already filling his mind. 

“He is still having his class, but it’ll end soon.”

“What do you mean? Professor Min doesn’t have classes today.”

Hajoon blinks at him, confused. “His Fridays are packed, mostly with major courses. He only has lunch break and a 30-minute break between 2:30 to 3 PM.”

“But he told me—he has classes with the seniors?”

“The entire day, mostly lecture though. But I filled in for him after the lunch break. Daeun demanded nap time,” Hajoon chuckles. 

Namjoon doesn’t know what to feel. He really doesn’t so instead of speaking he just follows Hajoon inside the classroom at the end of the hallway on his left. 

Namjoon doesn’t know what to feel the moment he quietly steps inside the classroom. Yoongi’s facing the whiteboard with Daeun strapped on him, her tiny head tucked against his neck. Hajoon offers the spare chair and Namjoon nods dumbly.

Namjoon doesn’t know what to feel when Yoongi turns to face the class and starts talking about music stuff that Namjoon can fully comprehend but decides against it. He can’t comprehend anything but how his niece is tucked safely in the elder’s arms, strapped with a yellow baby cloth, and sleeping peacefully. It’s as if Yoongi’s voice was some sort of a lullaby to her ears. 

“Daeun’s a sweet kid,” Hajoon whispers, pulling out his water bottle from his bag and taking a sip of his water. “She’s also good at playing instruments. Or at least she’s good at copying Professor Min.”

Namjoon glances at Hajoon curiously. 

“Huh?”

“Professor Min has Piano sessions this morning,” Hajoon explains. “He went to the education department and borrowed a children’s piano so Daeun can play with it while he’s teaching the seniors.”

“He what?”

Hajoon only nods continues to ramble. Namjoon tries his best to grasp what’s coming out of Hajoon’s mouth but all he can think of is how Yoongi lied to him because he wanted to help.

All he can think of is how Yoongi pretended that he has no class just so can let Namjoon focus on his talk. All he can think of is how he’d forgotten Yoongi’s schedule just because he got so stressed at the situation. All he can think of is how—fuck, how lucky he is to be friends with Min Yoongi.

All he can think of is how he’d decided to be more than just friends with Yoongi. All he can think of is how thankful he is for Yoongi’s presence because he’s certain, he’s not going to meet someone like Min Yoongi even in his next life.

“Make sure to turn in—” Namjoon snaps away from his thoughts and looks at the professor who’s swaying on his feet and bouncing Daeun, pressing a kiss on her forehead. Namjoon wants to do the same but on Yoongi’s forehead. God the sight is enough to make his heart leap everywhere but inside his chest. Yoongi is smiling so happily, wide and gummy, as he hugs and sways his niece. Namjoon is sure he'll cry soon if Yoongi wouldn't stop making him fall for him more and more, nonstop. No limits, eternal. 

“My baby’s grumpy when woken up,” Yoongi says playfully making the entire class and Hajoon laugh. 

“I didn’t know you’re a father,” one of the students says teasingly.

“Mr. Choi,” Yoongi tuts. “I may not look like it, but I can be a capable father.”

Namjoon nods dumbly. That’s the beauty of having Seniors in class. They’re familiar with the professors and know how to approach them. Besides, Yoongi’s just a perfect professor, too. Almost everyone in his department loves him. 

Namjoon loves him. 

Daeun turns to scan the room and then presses her face against Yoongi's neck. A hand quickly caresses Daeun’s long locks and half of the class coos at them. Even Namjoon. But it came out more of a choke than a cooing sound. 

“Professor Min is so good at her,” Hajoon tells Namjoon and Namjoon feels his breath stuck on his throat when Yoongi presses another kiss on her forehead. 

“She’s a niece of a friend,” Yoongi informs the class. “And they needed a sitter. She’s such a sweetheart, doesn’t she?”

Half of the class coos again when Daeun wiggles in his arms and mumbles an Uncle Yoon too loudly. 

“Okay, it’s almost dinner time for my little Daeun so we need to cut this short.”

Most of the class cheers while the rest giggle when Yoongi begins bouncing Daeun and swaying on his steps. Namjoon wants to just bundle them both in his arms. He wants to just get up on his feet and pull him in for a kiss because the thing is, he wants this. He wants to be a dad, he wants a family and he wants all of these with Min Yoongi. 

Fuck, he wants it so bad. 

He’s never been good with words, especially when it comes to Yoongi. He can give the best speech, present the greatest content, and deliver the most engaging lecture but it’s always been difficult with Yoongi. It’s always difficult with him because he’s so afraid that he may ruin things. He might ruin what he’s built - for more than a decade - with his best friend. 

But now, he’s sure - a hundred percent - that he’s going to throw caution to the wind. 

“Turn in your paper by Tuesday next week, that paper accumulates 60% of your final grade. I don’t want to see your faces next academic year anymore,” Yoongi teases. “Don’t be like me, I’ve repeated a year in high school.”

Namjoon bites the insides of his cheeks and wants to kick the elder. He’s throwing things like a joke and god, he hates it. He's been regretting saying that until now, knows that it's his fault why Yoongi has become such an overachiever, even though Yoongi reasons that he just wants to maximize his opportunities. See, love is complex and Namjoon only wants to make it simple, simple fights, simple dreams, simple things as long as it's with his Yoongi hyung. 

Different cries of disbelief, teasing and shock echo in the room but Yoongi just laughs at his students and waves them off. 

“Go, shoo. Away, all of you,” Yoongi says, faux-glaring at all of them. “My baby and I are hungry. Be safe on your way home.” 

Namjoon remains on his chair, watching the students flee out of the room. He’s in shock and confused and troubled because a lot of things are happening in his head, in front of him and what the future offers. And he doesn’t know what to do. He doesn’t even know that he’s stopped breathing until he hears Daeun’s giggles and calls for his name.

“Uncle Namu,” Namjoon looks ahead and sees that Hajoon’s already beside Yoongi, offering the professor his drink. Daeun is running toward him and Namjoon stands up and reaches for her. 

“Hi baby,” Namjoon says, pulling her in his chest and kissing her cheek. “Were you good? You didn’t give uncle Yoon any troubles, did you?”

“I did good,” Daeun replies toothily, patting Namjoon’s chest. He grabs his discarded yet still full coffee cup and walks toward the whiteboard. Hajoon has already left leaving the three of them in the room. 

“How was your meeting?” Yoongi asks, clearing the table and sliding his laptop inside his bag. 

“It’s okay,” Namjoon replies meekly. He’s itchy, is the thing. Itchy to just—

“Come here, Yoongs,” Namjoon pulls Yoongi who was holding the baby bag, and hugs him against his chest. Daeun giggles on his other arm, half of her body squished in between the hug. 

Namjoon tightens his hold on Yoongi’s waist.

“Joon?” Yoongi asks, wrapping his arms around Namjoon’s torso in instinct. The younger closes his eyes, breathes in deeply and—

He kisses Yoongi’s forehead. Namjoon only realizes now how their height difference helps him to give the perfect forehead kiss. Yoongi squeezes his torso and Namjoon places another kiss on the elder’s forehead. 

He’s always been brave with his actions anyway. He’ll talk later. He’ll tell everything, but for now, he presses another kiss on the elder’s forehead and to the crown of his hair. 

With Min Yoongi, he’ll be brave. 

—

Donghyun scoops Daeun out of Namjoon’s arms in front of the hospital. She fell asleep after eating her dinner in Yoongi’s office before they left. The car ride was electrified but no one has the guts to speak.

“Would you like to come upstairs?”

Namjoon shakes his head. “We’ll visit next time. I am sure our parents would want to see my nephew first. Besides,” Namjoon grins at Donghyun. He thumbs at Yoongi’s car. “I have something important to tell him.”

Donghyun looks past Namjoon and smiles at Yoongi who simply waves at him. He then stares at Namjoon and grins at the elder. 

“Finally found the guts to confess, hyung?”

Namjoon only chuckles and pushes Donghyun back inside. Donghyun turns to look at him one last time, mumbling a soft Fighting, and Namjoon nods before turning on his heels and getting back inside the car. 

“Where to—”

“Can we—”

Namjoon grins at Yoongi’s flushed face. Yoongi looks away and tightens his hold on the steering wheel. The younger clears his throat and buckles his seatbelt.

“Can we go to the chicken place?”

“The one near your dorms in college?”

Namjoon’s blinding smile was enough of an answer.

They arrive at the small chicken restaurant that doesn’t look that great. It’s a sight for sore eyes if Namjoon’s being honest, especially when compared to the shops aligned against it but it’s their go-to place back in college, especially on Fridays. 

It’s where they share the smallest basket of Korean fried chicken, half and half but they’ve been frequent patrons that the owner would switch their orders to the largest basket for free. Yoongi has helped in this store during summer when he needed money and Namjoon does the same only for free. They’ve become friends with the owner easily that when they got inside, the petite old lady smiles widely at them. 

“Yoongi! Namjoon! It’s been so long!”

“Hello,” Namjoon bows politely and Yoongi does the same. The lady guides them to their usual spot that’s coincidentally vacant at that time. 

“Your usual order, I assume?”

Namjoon grins and raises a thumb. “With beer please.”

The lady nods and leaves but not before squeezing Yoongi’s cheeks. Namjoon kind of shares the same sentiment. Yoongi’s cheeks are squishable. 

A server comes right after, placing their glasses of beer and side dishes. Namjoon takes a sip and can feel Yoongi’s eyes on him. He encourages the elder to drink, too, and hums happily when Yoongi obeys quietly. 

“When was the last time we ate here?” Namjoon asks suddenly, eyeing the place and noticing that everything has stayed the same. He can still Yoongi’s vandal on one of the walls. He’d doodled on it when the owner wasn’t looking, only for laughs, and once he was caught, Yoongi was sent to the kitchen to wash the dishes. 

“After graduation, I think,” Yoongi replies, placing his glass on the table. Namjoon nods and pulls the elder’s hand smoothly. He interlocks their fingers and smiles when Yoongi tightens the hold. 

“I love you, did you know?”

Namjoon is sure this isn’t the way how one should confess. He knows that if he’s to magically appear a manual on dating, this isn’t found on any page but he’s going to do it his way and so he repeats the statement.

“I love you so much, Yoongi,” he says, looking at Yoongi straight in the eye. “I love you since college, or maybe longer. I don’t know exactly, but I know that I love you and I want you.”

It’s quiet after that and Namjoon only waits. He’s always waited for Yoongi, always waits for him, every day. Maybe it’s because he felt bad for what he had said back in high school, how he’d sounded so rude and full of mirth just because he’d received a grade of 76 in a stupid science project. Maybe it’s because he’s aware that his words had greatly affected the elder, thinking that he needed to prove himself that’s why he studied so much back in college. Maybe it’s because he knows that Yoongi will take his word to the grave. And if he’s correct with his assumptions then he’ll start telling the elder beautiful words, words that he deserves to hear, words that he should hear so that he’ll have something nice to remember. 

He’ll do it all for Min Yoongi. 

“I didn’t have a dream back then,” Yoongi tells him, moving closer by dragging his chair. “I didn’t think I’d be that type of guy anyway. But then I met you. I started dreaming.”

The bell on the front door chimes, signaling the staff that there’s a new customer. Namjoon doesn’t break eye contact, however, and pulls Yoongi closer.

“I wish it’s all going well, your dreams,” Namjoon says. 

Yoongi nods, breaking eye contact for a moment and then glancing back at him. “It’s all worth it. I always thought I can’t be that guy, you know? That man you deserve.”

“I don’t think I deserve you,” Namjoon counters, pulling Yoongi’s hand close to his lips. Namjoon looks at the elder’s fingers before looking at him again. “You deserve so much more, hyung.”

“I think you’re more than enough,” Yoongi grins, tilting his head to the side and flushing furiously when Namjoon kisses the back of Yoongi’s hand. “Joon—”

“I want to be yours, hyung, ever since. But I am just so stupid, and so scared,” Namjoon murmurs, thumbing at Yoongi’s knuckles. “You’re too bright. You’re amazing and I’m—”

“You’re a big baby,” Yoongi laughs, and Namjoon snorts before kicking the leg of Yoongi’s chair and kissing Yoongi’s hand again. 

“You’re the baby,” Namjoon says charmingly. Yoongi rolls his eyes and playfully tugs at the hold. 

“Shut up, fuck,” Yoongi cusses, and Namjoon laughs with him. 

It’s always been so simple with Yoongi - balanced - like the bonsai plant sitting in his office. Their relationship has always this different kind of charm, exclusive, special. And Namjoon likes it the best. 

When their basket of chicken arrives, they grin at each other before stuffing their faces with food, a hand on a chicken piece while the other in a tight hold. 

Namjoon’s certain that he’ll never let go. He’s also certain that Yoongi wouldn’t let him. 

—

Seokjin (Business): pack your bags, we’re going to jeju.

Seokjin (Business): we’ve suffered enough, i think it’s best we go altogether.

Seokjin (Business): file for your leave this january

Seokjin (Business): i don’t care if it’s freezing cold, we’re going to jeju

Seokjin (Business): we all deserve this

Hoseok (Arts): me especially, yes! 11 years of pining has finally come to an end

Hoseok (Arts): worst experience ever

Jeongguk (Arts): lmfao can’t relate only know 8 but ok

Jeongguk (Arts): fite me, jimin-ssi?? Fite me!

Jimin (Education): omg shut up

Taehyung (Arts): if we’re all going to jeju then what’s make it so special for jin-hyung since he won the bet?

Jimin (Education): he’s flying a week earlier, yoongi-hyung’s treat

Jeongguk (Arts): wtf? Smh???!

Seokjin (Business): namjoon also promised to pay for my suite

Hoseok (Arts): favoritism? I was their best friend first??

Taehyung (Arts): that’s it, let’s make a new bet!

Jimin (Education): ???

Seokjin (Business): what do you propose??

Hoseok (Arts): how about who’s going to be the best man?

Jimin (Education): it’s pretty much obvious 

Taehyung (Arts): how about number of kids they’re going to adopt??

Jeongguk (Arts): shouldn’t we bet when they’re going to get married first?

Namjoon (Science): you guys talk as if we’re not in the gc -_-

Seokjin (Business): we talk as if YOU are not in the gc

Jeongguk (Arts): true. yoongi doesn’t even check this gc

Yoongi (Music): that’s hyung to you

Hoseok (Arts): so what are we going to bet on next??

—

“You didn’t really mean it, did you?”

Yoongi turns around to face him. It’s late, already 5 in the morning, and Yoongi furrows his brows at the question. 

It’s New Year and neither of them welcomed the new year with their families. Instead, Namjoon had cleared his old apartment to move in with Yoongi. They had spent the entire morning moving boxes in their respective rooms and squeezing some of Namjoon’s furniture in Yoongi’s study. They slept the entire afternoon, only to wake at 10 PM and order black bean noodles since Yoongi’s too tired to cook any decent meal for the holiday.

They spent the next hours fixing the closet while drinking beer and feasting on some fried chicken. A countdown celebration was playing on the TV while they shuffle from one room to the other, clearing boxes until Yoongi whined that he wanted to sleep at around 4:45 AM. 

“Hmm?” Yoongi moves closer and Namjoon naturally wraps an arm around his waist.

“That you tried to be better just because of me.”

Yoongi looks up at him and flutters his lashes slowly, sleep already pulling him in. he smiles softly at the younger and cups his cheek. 

“You made me want to be a better person, Joon. So yes, it’s because of you.”

"What I said wasn't a motivation, though," Namjoon pouts. 

"You're important to me," Yoongi sighs, blinking at the younger sleepily. The sun is already creeping slowly, pale gold rays reaching the corner of their room. "Sure, you didn't mean it but it only made me think that I can do better. I want to do better."

"I'm glad that we're together, even if we'd fought a lot when we younger."

"You're a big baby, always gets riled up when I belittle Science. I like that you're much calmer now."

Namjoon leans down to kiss him on the lips as response. He likes kissing Yoongi, likes the way his plump lips press against Yoongi's thin chapped ones. He can always feel Yoongi hitching his breath every time they lock lips, as if it's their first time. Yoongi grins lazily against the kiss and tangles their legs under the sheets. 

Namjoon thinks he’s good at two things now.

One is being good in taking care of trees and two in taking care of the man he loves for more than a decade, Min Yoongi. There’s another thing he wishes to be good at and that’s being a dad. He might have sent hints to the elder already but at the same time he’s going to wait. He’s waited this long for the elder, another 10 more years couldn’t harm. All we wants now is to be the best for Yoongi, just like how Yoongi’s already perfect for him. He may not express it diligently in words, might lack the right act for it but he’s sure, a hundred percent sure, a thousand times more that—

“I love you so much,” Namjoon mumbles, pulling away only to press a kiss on the elder’s forehead. Yoongi nods, eyes already closed. Namjoon pulls the sheets up to their shoulder and he eyes at the pot of plum blossom on Yoongi’s bedside table. He's gotten that plant because it reminded him of his Yoongi, his strong, resilient, hardworking (and pink!) hyung. 

I love you so much, my admirable hyung.