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thomas father wasnt the best man in the world, but sometimes thoma still wondered where he was.
he always just concluded he abandoned him but internally, he knew what the more probable conclusion was.
—
deep blue waves taking thoma under the water
the last time thoma had any sorts of panic attack was when he was at the statue, getting his vision almost stolen.
he began to panic, loosing his remaining breath.
but then, he had the traveler and paimon, now he is all alone, no doubt scared of himself. he didn’t even notice his nails sinking into his skin.
he prayed to both his archons, all he wanted was to see his father.
he felt as if he was under water, ironic as water was his biggest fear and his trigger for his panic.
he saw dots, warm bile threatinig to spill.
he felt the sudden urge to puke and he covered his mouth, trembling.
he felt stuff brush against his legs, all he wanted was to go home.
he needed to see his ayato, he wanted his comforting words and sooth teasing voice.
it all faded to black
—
he walked to his masters room and it was empty but from the other side of the hall, he heard empty sobs. he walked towards the office and knocked. “ayato?” thoma could barely hear the shaking voice of his companion.
ayato was sobbing, because of his parents.
thoma was never close to his mother really but there have been days where he cried because he missed his parents himself. thoma wouldn’t know how it was to have actually deceased parents, his fathers status is unknown and his mother is fine in mond.
she sends him the occasional letter along with master diluc, kaeya, jean and lisa.
he missed them all alot.
•••••••••••••••••••
thoma and ayato woke up the next morning, only recalling that they cuddled last night.
“hey thoma, why did you even come jnto my room yesterday?” ayato asked. “n-not that i minded though hahahha”
“oh, uh” he looked at his now bandaged arms. “a nightmare, i knew you would be working yourself too hard so i went to see if you were awake is all.”
“oh thoma.. was the nightmare about..?”
it went unspoken
“yeeep” he pulled the “e”
“oh my poor thoma” he got up and wrapped his arms around thoma, he gave the second best hugs, itto in first obviously. thoma couldn’t keep it in anymore, he cried into his masters arms, holding him like life support.
this was nice
not the crying part, of course
but being with ayato was always nice