Archive of Our Own ^beta

5:30 PM, Present Time

It is a quiet afternoon in the hospital.

Gray clouds surround the city as the rain solemnly pours outside the hospital window, and Nishinoya could not help but stare. The young man had nothing to benefit from doing so, but he thought of it as a way to kill time.

 
Just as his sickness is slowly killing him .

For as long as Nishinoya could remember, his family has had a history of heart problems. Whether inherited or contracted, he knew they all died in the end but had at least felt the warm presence of their loved ones before they departed.

But unlike his predecessors, it was ultimately his unhealthy habits that caused his early diagnosis. And if anything, Nishinoya would have continued to insist such practices were helping him had it not landed him where he stands at present. He shifts his thoughts to Tanaka Ryūnosuke—a good man and his team mate in high school—who rushed him to the closest hospital when he collapsed weeks ago as he paid a visit.

Years back after graduating from high school, Nishinoya left somewhere far from Miyagi—far away from the place where the memories resided. He went to university and lived a simple life there as much as he could. Even so, at heart, Nishinoya admits that his hometown still has a special place in his heart.

“A heart,” he thinks ruefully, that is failing him.

At the sound of knocking on his door, Nishinoya turns his head to the entrance to see who it is. So it is Tanaka who has come for a visit.

"Hey, Noya. How're 'ya feeling?" Tanaka asks as he walks into the room with a winsome smile, to which Nishinoya attempts to give one of his own, but it only comes out weak.

"I'm fine, Ryū," He replies, his smile wearing out. He purses his lips and watches his friend settle some food on top of the mini counter he brought for him. "The doctor told me details for the surgery tomorrow."

That's right. Fortunately for Nishinoya, the doctor informed him that his condition is treatable through surgery.

"Alright..." Tanaka trails off a bit as he focuses on setting the food, but when Nishinoya's words finally register themselves in his head, he immediately exclaims: "ALRIGHT!" Nishinoya offers a small smile at his enthusiasm. The mini counter is now set up, and the former libero appreciates that his friend does this for him almost every day.

"What time's the surgery again?"

"4 PM."

As long as Tanaka's schedule isn't packed with work, it doesn't matter what the weather is since he could leave and see Nishinoya more frequently that way. Besides, his workplace is only a few miles away from the hospital, and he could take the train on the way home. And even before Nishinoya's hospitalization, he would always find time to hang out with him often, especially during the weekends. But, at the same time, he values his friend's space and need for privacy, so he refrains from visiting on a daily basis.

"Thankfully, my boss gave me a break this week." He says, taking the folding table nearby and wiping it clean before placing it in front of Nishinoya. "I can assist 'ya until the break ends." Then, he sets down a plate from the mini counter with a delicious dish of whole wheat linguine with braised mushrooms and a glass of water next to it.

"Eat up, Noya! Kiyoko-san made this for us to eat, especially you!" Tanaka brings out his own dish and sits beside him. He sees how Nishinoya's lips curl into a smile as soon as he hears the meals had been prepared by the girl they both deeply admired. 

"Thanks, Ryū!"

"Don't mind it, man."

Nishinoya puts more strength into his voice to show appreciation. Honestly, he feels bad that his former team has to go the extra mile for him now that they have their separate lives to live. But on the bright side, he's very grateful to be blessed with such amazing people like them.

He slowly sits up with Tanaka there to assist him, then reaches out a hand to eat the dish, savoring every bite of it. He likes—no, he loves it.

"Kiyoko-san actually had urgent business here with her work, but she left right after," Tanaka explains to him. "Y'know, she wanted to see 'ya, but with the kinda work she has, she couldn't make it—so she contacted me and asked me to hand you the food in her stead. Don't worry, though! Kiyoko-san also said she'll visit soon once her schedule clears up."

Nishinoya eases out a smile. Drinking his water, he gives a shaky thumbs up to Tanaka as a gesture of thanks. After that, he puts the glass down on the foldable table and continues eating. 

At the sight of his friend enjoying the food, Tanaka lets himself smile as well. However, once his eyes trail to the frail figure beneath the hospital gown, he feels his heart sink. It just hurts to see Nishinoya like that, so he turns his head elsewhere—he settles for the white tile floor of the hospital room. To Tanaka, Nishinoya was the kind of person who deserves the world. But it seems as though the world itself refuses to recognize that.

"Hey, Ryū. You're not gonna eat anymore?" Nishinoya asks him. Tanaka only realizes then that he spaced out for a while. His eyes, now locked with the former libero's, take in the look of confusion as he cocks his head to the unfinished meal.

"Ryū. Are you good, man?" He asks a second time, his face showing concern.

"AH!" Tanaka snaps himself out of it. "Good! M'fine, Noya. No worries here." He tones down and grins meekly, reassuring himself and Noya that he is fine—that is, as fine as one could be knowing their friend's suffering from their sickness.

But as reality has it, he feels sad over Nishinoya's state. Shifting his eyes around the room and back to him, he tries his damn best not to reveal his inner emotion to prevent his friend from worrying any further. And what's more, his well-being is his topmost priority at the moment.

Heck, Nishinoya's life is already at risk because of this illness. So what else could Tanaka do but get himself together?

He steels himself and thinks of an excuse that would match his mood seconds ago to cover up his growing panic. Then, Tanaka slightly groans and proceeds to eat the pasta on his plate.

"Well, work's been pretty stressful." Tanaka starts, hoping he sounds convincing enough. He can feel the food clog his throat up a bit from the pressure Nishinoya's eyes have on him. His mind turns blank.

Cursing inwardly, he tells himself to get it straight and think of something better to say. "There—" A pause. "There were a lot of stubborn clients floodin' in, and they seriously made my head hurt!" Tanaka emphasizes his point as he scarfs down the last bits of pasta with all the pent-up aggression he could muster. "Glad that shit's over now."

Nishinoya stays silent all the while, which makes Tanaka's skin run cold about his acting skills—or, rather, lack thereof.

"Shit...You complaining, Ryū? Then you must be taking your work seriously!" The person in question dramatically gasps before breaking into a short-breath fit of laughs at the anecdote of his friend, who starts turning red from embarrassment and tells him to cut it out without any actual bite in his tone. Of course, that does nothing to stop Nishinoya.

"Dammit, Noya! Give it a rest now, will 'ya?"

"No! You—" Nishinoya struggles to take a sip of water from his glass, a teasing lilt to his voice as he attempts to subdue his laughter. "You don't understand, Ryū! You're using your head outside of the court. Wait—hold on, I've never even seen you use it at all!" He wheezes out and loses strength on the hand holding up the cup, causing him to place it on the table clumsily. 

"Hey! People complain, and you're no exception! Now dig in, 'cuz we're building up some weight here."

"Yes. Yes, Tanaka- san ." He mustered, beginning to come down from his high.

And it goes on like that for a while. Tanaka gives up and laughs together with his friend instead. He's just glad Nishinoya could still joke around with him despite his condition.

After they finish their faux squabble and hearty meal, Tanaka gets up to fetch Nishinoya's plate to wash it alongside his. Then, he returns to place the utensils back in the bag, wrapping them up to bring home. As Tanaka does this, both of them engage in random discussions.

And almost suddenly, Nishinoya says: "Oh, please tell Kiyoko-san I said thank you."

"Right, I'll be sure to tell her!"

"Thanks, Ryū."

Midway in their seemingly endless conversation, Nishinoya's mind starts to wander, and he remembers someone dear to him—that person exists within his thoughts. Now, he would never consider himself a deep thinker, but that person always resurfaces into his mind, especially at moments when he feels vulnerable. Unbeknownst to Tanaka, his face becomes dark, and he closes his eyes tightly to rid himself of the heavy feeling that's settling in his chest.

"...And Daichi-san and Suga-san told me they're gonna visit," Tanaka relays as he makes way to his seat beside Nishinoya. "They'll come over soon after Daichi-san's done with the paperwork he's been workin' on."

Nishinoya only responds with a low hum. His focus is on the sunset sky that colors the space outside his room a soft shade of orange—not that he cared much for the other hues and their specific names. Not long after, a familiar dull and suffocating ache blossoms in him, and Nishinoya stops answering altogether, no longer wanting to talk.

Tanaka eventually notices this shift in behavior and knows what's on his mind that very moment. It hurts to think, much less speak of it. But out of all of them, it was Nishinoya who was most affected by what happened. And the pain still hasn't gone away since then.

"Noya..."

"I miss Asahi-san," Nishinoya interjects, his eyes now on Tanaka's, pulling him out of his thoughts almost completely.

There's a hitch when Tanaka takes a breath, and he looks away. Even after all these years, neither Nishinoya nor the former team members felt comfortable talking about the incident. 

Everything about him—from the best and worst qualities to his personality, the brightest and saddest memories shared with him from his starting and final moments—talking about him just made things tense.

It was too sudden, too soon. Everyone loved and missed him. The pain that followed was almost unbearable and more so crushing for Nishinoya, who often recalls the times he had with Karasuno's former ace player.

He was a good guy—Azumane Asahi. But why him?

Perhaps, they'll never know.

____________________________________________________________________________________

Nishinoya sits on his hospital bed, painfully awake and pondering the thoughts that surfaced on his mind that afternoon. The hospital is no longer open to visitors at this hour, and Tanaka left nearly two hours ago, who said he'll return tomorrow. He stares at the blank space on the walls of his room, often stealing glances at the view of the night sky from his window, to which he requested the attending nurse to leave the blinds open.

With his attention to the evening sky, he continues to stare until he can fall asleep. He waits a few minutes longer, but, no, he's wide awake. And somehow, the dark matter that occupied the space above, in the sky, was unpleasant. 

"There are no stars tonight," the young man thinks to himself, his expression turning sour. And yet, it is this same starless sky he finds himself looking at almost every other night. The rest of the city falls into slumber while he stays sleepless from intrusive thoughts that appear more often than not. He feels as though he has too much time after his hospitalization.

No, he doesn't want to think of him again. At least not yet, not now.

Then, he recalls that tonight wouldn't be the first time he found himself thinking of such a somber night. In fact, he used to walk under the same starless sky on some days he went home from work. At moments like this, Nishinoya can feel the weight of emptiness on his chest, which becomes heavier with every passing second.

Nishinoya's tears begin to form on the sides, and he clutches his chest with his right hand. There's just no way he could forget him at all. Even after he spent those years by himself, he had never felt so lonely and empty in his entire life. 

"Forget it," He tells himself. "I'll live and get over this damn surgery."

In the first place, he had given up on trying everything and anything. But within him is a strength that pushes him to continue fighting and keep living despite his initial decision. He knows he's dying, but he has taken the chance to live once more.

For sure...Asahi would want that for him too.

With Nishinoya lying on his back, he moves his right hand from his chest to his eyes and covers them. "I'm being brave now, Asahi-san." He whispers to no one, his voice turning into silent sobs. "I chose something right. Are you watching me?"

Here, in the hospital, he has no vice to drown himself in to escape the despair he feels every time remembers Asahi and how desperately he wishes for him to answer back to his cries. Then again, he's supposed to recuperate and restore his health for the better. Still, he's barely holding it together, and nothing can ever really keep him grounded.

After a while, Nishinoya takes his hand off his eyes, averting his gaze to the night outside. His breathing was a bit shaky as he let out a sigh. And again, for tonight as well, he surrenders himself to the memories infused with pain, which he hoped to forever lock in the back of his mind. The only words that he can muster with what strength has left in him are: 

"I miss you."

____________________________________________________________________________________

“Promise me!”

“We will.”

____________________________________________________________________________________

Five Years Ago

As the basketball team requested to borrow the gym, Coach Ukai announced that there would be no after-school practice for the day. Nishinoya took this as a chance to hang out with the ace, to which the latter agreed.

After walking around while chattering away about their lives and the team, the pair arrived at the local park. Nishinoya told Asahi to take a moment's rest while he would get something for them. Nishinoya said it was going to be his treat.

When Nishinoya came back, he brought with him two watermelon-flavored popsicles from Ukai's store. He'd usually buy his favorite soda popsicle but eventually decided to go for the watermelon this time since they were limited edition. Maybe for a change, he mused. Then, his hazel eyes landed on the person seated on the bench reading a book.

There he was—a mature-looking boy wearing a slightly disheveled uniform, his dark brown hair tied up to a man bun. Nishinoya took his time to admire the other's features from the distance where he stood. He looked really cool like that.

Nishinoya must have forgotten himself at some point as he walked towards him. Even so, his senior's attention was stuck on the book from the way he didn't notice the presence now sitting next to him. He cleared his throat a bit as he tore open the wrapper of his popsicle and asked, "What's that about, Asahi-san?"

"N-Noya!" Asahi finally acknowledged him, albeit surprised by the sound of it. He felt his heart tighten for a second. And while Nishinoya had no idea what he did to deserve such a reaction, he laughed, leaving a flustered Asahi choking on excuses, which he never quite managed to get out.

Of course, it didn't take long until Asahi regained his composure. Satisfied enough with whatever strangeness happened earlier, Nishinoya ceased the teasing and pointed to the plastic bag containing the only popsicle inside it, indicating it was Asahi's. Then, the ace thanked him and set the book on his lap before opening the wrapper.

"You still haven't answered my question yet, Asahi-san," Nishinoya stated with a little frown, looking up at the mixed colors that make up the sunset stretching throughout the sky. Seems warm, he thought briefly. And this time, Asahi was the one to chuckle. 

"Ah, it's about the diverse cultures and beauty of other countries," Asahi answered him while savoring the sweet dessert. "Reading it made me want to go and explore the world and see its wonders for myself."


As those words left his mount, Nishinoya's curiosity and interest slowly took over. He knew Asahi loved reading about other things, but he never thought his senior was so serious about traveling. 

"Yeah? So, um, which country are you reading about right now?" He had his head facing Asahi's direction when he raised the question.

"Switzerland," He replied. The ace then picked up the book from his lap using his vacant hand, sharing what bits of information he learned from reading about the country. "Over there, they have large mountains, glacier-topped alps, and a great view of villages blended with the prosperous cities—just the thought of those make me wanna go there so bad." Asahi had his eyes closed, imagining himself being there in Switzerland even for a moment.

The libero, meanwhile, noticed the other man's determination and got a closer look at him. "He looks so peaceful," Nishinoya thought, feeling a probably cliché warmth spreading all over him at the sight of Asahi's reverie. It was simply mesmerizing to see him at ease. But apart from that, Nishinoya feels happier knowing just how serious Asahi is about wanting to see the world as he secretly does too.

As if soaking in Asahi's determination, Nishinoya felt confident in sharing his desire to travel to him, harnessing a great energy that pretty much exceeds the other. Finishing his popsicle, he threw its stick in the plastic bag as he stood in high spirits and marched up to his senior. Another spark had then set itself in his head—something far better.

"Noya?" Asahi opened his eyes and examined the figure standing in front of him. The libero had his arms crossed, but there was a glint in his gaze that spelled hope. Not to mention, he was grinning from ear to ear. So, despite his evident confusion, Asahi waited for what his junior had to say.

"Asahi-san!"

"Yes, Noya?"

Nishinoya wasn't nervous. If anything, he was very excited about this one. He just needed to keep it cool and calm, even if staying still became harder with every second and brain cell begging him to spill it out in a breath. Collecting himself, the idea of traveling sounded a lot more thrilling, and so he said:

"I want to go with you." 

It must have taken a measly three seconds for Nishinoya to realize what he blurted out. When it finally hit him, he had a look that transitioned from horror to mortification almost all at once. He had made himself appear like a complete fool. In shame and silence, he chastised himself inwardly. How could he let himself get so carried away?

While the mental battle in Nishinoya's head ensued, Asahi got his message. On the one hand, he felt happy that his junior wanted to go travel as well. But, on the other hand, he questioned why he wanted to go with him.

"You're saying you want to come with me and see the world?" Asahi clarified, and Nishinoya nodded with a resounding yes.

"That's alright, but is there any reason why you want to go with me in particular?" He couldn't help but ask what led him to that decision. Sure, whether or not he does have a reason doesn't really matter, and Asahi isn't in any place to pry for answers. Still, though, he would like to sort his thoughts on Nishinoya's request before responding.

"But it has to be you, Asahi-san," Nishinoya insisted. This time, he gathered himself, holding his senior's attention. "I can go see the world by myself, but it wouldn't be as fun as sharing it with you."

With those words, time seemed to slow down for Asahi. He replayed them over and over, recalling how he always traveled alone and found those experiences enthralling. So, no, he hasn't considered bringing a companion on his trips. But going with bright-eyed Nishinoya might just open better opportunities to see more of the world for what it is and what it could be beyond traveling.

The idea in and of itself is new and, without a doubt, fun. Asahi felt his lips tug into a smile with a light blush dusting his cheeks.

By all means, his answer is "Yes." 

"Yes?"

"Yeah," Asahi assured him, the smile resting easily on his face, overpowering other thoughts and emotions outside of pure bliss for the meantime. All he recognized was happiness in the way everything seemed to be in place for him—or, rather, them. "I think it'd be fun to be with you too, Noya."

Nishinoya's smile broadened as he pumped his fist in the air with a loud cheer of "YEAH!" knowing that he now had the chance to travel the world with his senior, whom he respects and adores. He thought nothing could possibly stop them from making it happen. And from the anticipation alone, Nishinoya wanted to graduate faster, grab his suitcases, and leave the country pronto.

Should he tell Tanaka about this? Never mind him. Nishinoya was going to take on the whole world with Asahi-san anyway, and everyone else would eventually know of what great adventures they shared one day.

But before that day comes, he and Asahi-san have to swear on it. With his pinky out to his senior, Nishinoya took a deep breath to compose himself. 

"When we're good enough to go out by ourselves, let's see the world together, Asahi-san! That's a promise!" The libero exclaimed, his grin not having faltered at all. 

Asahi felt the same way. Maybe more. 

Instead of reaching his pinky to seal the promise, Asahi pulled Nishinoya into a hug—a hug that gave the junior enough space to breathe at least. However, that did nothing to nullify the intensity of his embrace. In any case, it took both of them by surprise.

The blush on Asahi's cheeks darkened but cared little for that. He believed hugging Nishinoya was enough a secure promise between them. 

Then he said softly, "I swear, Noya. Let's travel together...we will. I promise that!"

Nishinoya, recovered enough from the shock of Asahi's sudden hug, smiled. He reciprocated the embrace, holding his senior closer, and began to let out a cheerful laugh. Hearing this, Asahi joined in.

They felt like neither would ever have to be alone. It was a promise.

____________________________________________________________________________________

“I’ll love you for a thousand more.”

____________________________________________________________________________________

Two Months Later

A practice match camp with Nekoma and the rest of the schools in Tokyo had been organized and was set to happen for a week. Soon enough, the start of their training days finally arrived.

Team Karasuno made their way into Tokyo early in the morning, where they received a subtle but enthusiastic welcome from Nekoma. Everyone came in with high spirits and were in no circumstances taking it out until they reached the gymnasium. Besides, the atmosphere was great for easy conversations before tensions went through the roof. So, Nishinoya was with Tanaka and Yamamoto fawning over Kiyoko almost the exact second they saw each other. But what can he say, great men think alike.

"Alright, everyone! Let's settle down and rest a bit before we officially start the camp." Karasuno's head coach, Takeda, called out to his team that slowly gathered around him to hear his announcement.

"Yes, sir!" Team Karasuno replied, taking with them their respective belongings to the venue they lodged for the entire occasion. As they went on about their business, Asahi bent down to pick up a guitar case, which he slung over his shoulder. Then, he felt someone elbow him from his left side and whipped his head to see who it was.

"Are you ready, Asahi?" It was Daichi with a slightly smug look on his face. He knew the guitar's purpose even though they came to practice volleyball. Asahi turned away in embarrassment then shrugged, Daichi still following him in toe.

"I-I'm not sure. What if I mess—"

"Asahi-san!"

Asahi was interrupted by someone calling out to him. He saw Tanaka walking over with Nishinoya, who trailed behind. The pair of seniors watched them as Tanaka flashed a somewhat blinding and teasing grin, with Asahi as his indirect addressee. He's in on the plan. In contrast, Nishinoya was busy questioning himself until his eyes laid on the guitar case on Asahi's right shoulder.

"Oh! Is that guitar yours, Asahi-san?" He turned to his senior with barely concealed excitement, his hazel eyes sparkled with delight. "That's so damn cool—we should totally have a jam session later tonight!" His suggestion made Tanaka snort.

With Nishinoya standing in front of him, Asahi felt a little more flustered than usual. It didn't help that he was planning a surprise for him, so he turned his head to the side, hoping his junior hadn't caught on. Daichi took one glance at Asahi and elbowed him, shooting a look that reminded him to act naturally. Asahi then realized that they had both stopped in their tracks and, man, did he really need to calm down. The ace gave a small nod, telling Dachi he regained enough self-control and that they should continue walking to their assigned venue.

Upon Team Karasuno's arrival at a vacant classroom, which they'll be using until the end of camp, they settled down and made themselves comfortable with what possessions they brought along with them. After a while, Coach Ukai instructed the team to change and head for the gym immediately. On their way there minutes later, Asahi felt a light slap on his back. It was from Nishinoya, who grinned at him as a way to cheer him up before the practice.

"Let's not lose, Asahi-san!" The libero urged him, to which he felt his cheeks flush. In return, he smiled at Nishinoya, fueling the already fierce energy his junior possessed.

"Then let's do our best!"

____________________________________________________________________________________

At last, the first day of camp had concluded Karasuno as the losing team since they had the most penalties. Everyone else received an earlier dismissal for dinner, and it would do them good to clean themselves and rest up in preparation for the following day. Then, not long after, Karasuno finished their "extra" bit of training, feeling a wave of exhaustion hit their body. They resolved that they had to win next time.

Asahi walked through the hallways after taking a bath, making his way to the team's shared room. As he got inside, Sugawara greeted him before calling out to the rest of the freshmen to hit the showers and call it a day.

"Asahi!" He exclaimed, facing Asahi's direction. "You're looking great!" Before the setter could continue, Hinata and Kageyama raced for the shower room but were interrupted by the heavy tone in their captain's voice that called after them.

"Hinata! Kageyama!"

The remaining members in the room felt his restrained anger, prompting the pair to freeze from where they stood and apologize. Daichi gave a curt nod, and they left the room silently. They knew better than to horse around after that. And as the solemn atmosphere evened out, the two other first-years followed Hinata and Kageyama. 

"Both of them sure are energetic." Asahi piped in softly in an attempt to lighten the mood. No one responded save for the quiet hum from Sugawara, who probably did it to save his face more than in agreement with him. He and Daichi definitely had a lot going on in their minds. Another moment of silence passed, and Sugawara beckoned Asahi to come closer so they could check up on Daichi, whose tension had faded away for the most part. 

Daichi was now calm enough to look at both of his teammates straight in the eyes. However, he was especially bearing a hole into Asahi, but it didn't have the same edge from earlier. Instead, it was a knowing gaze, which made Asahi fidget on the spot, reminded of what he was about to do that evening.

Does Asahi really have it in himself to confess his feelings to his junior? It was all so nerve-wracking, but he wanted and it had to happen. There's just no backing out at that point.

Daichi and Sugawara took notice of Asahi's semi-internal breakdown then looked at each other. They both knew how Asahi felt towards Nishinoya and supported him. Nothing wrong there, but they were slightly worried that he might call the confession off from nerves getting the better of him. And, of course, they weren't about to let that happen after all the planning he had put into it.

Ever since Asahi willingly told them his feelings for their libero were anything but platonic, Daichi and Sugawara encouraged him to confess before they graduated. It was a given that Asahi would need to take time and effort to build his confidence to do such a thing. So, thinking that some help might quicken the process, they called in Tanaka, who agreed in a heartbeat. And it was also their wing spiker who suggested that Asahi should make his confession an opportunity to showcase his hidden talent. 

"You'd charm his pants off!" Tanaka beamed, and Asahi had to get his mind off from treading to unknown territory. At that, Sugawara commented with a sly smirk that Asahi would probably prefer them with their pants intact, drawing obnoxious laughs from Tanaka and Daichi, which sounded more dog-like than human. The heat blew up on Asahi's face, and he momentarily regretted ever sharing his feelings with them.

Coming to his senses, Asahi was very much determined to confess to Nishinoya. However, his fear of rejection was also present. He hated the thought of losing his friendship with the junior, maybe more so than the feelings he had for him beyond it. A chill ran down his spine.

"Come on...you can do it! If he rejects you, tell him that you're practicing how to not be a wimp off the court!" Asahi tried to rationalize. And then it hit him how making up excuses would render his hopefully heartfelt confession into something insincere, which he believed Nishinoya never deserved. If Asahi could, he would even give him the whole damn world if he asked. As he was so close to sulking, the ace felt someone pat on his shoulder as encouragement.

It was Sugawara giving him an extra thumbs up to raise his spirits. Asahi had to hand it to him for reading the atmosphere almost too well.

"You can do this, Asahi. We believe in you!" The setter assured him, a smile gracing his gentle features. His voice managed to soothe Asahi of the unease he felt, letting him stay grounded and a lot more relieved. In front of him was his guitar, the instrument he would use to quasi-serenade the person of his affections, that is, Nishinoya. To his right, he saw Daichi gesture him to take it.

"Go on and face him head-on, Asahi. He deserves to know how you feel too." Daichi smiles at him for what seems to be a first that whole day, causing Asahi to shoot him a funny look. 

"Suga, is the world ending soon?" Asahi asked in jest. The setter followed the direction where Asahi had motioned to, which was, apparently, Daichi. Suga wasn't the most graceful person when it came to holding in one's laugh. So the sight of a tired but proud Daichi was a feast to the eyes of people, particularly Sugawara, who at least knew him in person. Alas, he snorted, getting in on the joke with Asahi.

Once Daichi caught on that he was the butt of the joke, he scowled, which deepened the subtle crease between his eyebrows. Sugawara then did nothing to stop the shitfaced grin on his face and the laugh that bubbled on his throat. Daichi ignored him and instead looked at Asahi meaningfully. 

"Hurry up and take that thing out of here before Tanaka finishes distracting Noya!" The captain huffed, his voice a mix of impatience and anticipation for the confession. Holding the urge to roll his eyes, Daichi picked the guitar up and handed it to Asahi. The ace took the stringed instrument and was struck with the same sensation before playing an official match with his team.

The only difference between those games and that moment was that he could potentially lose someone so dear to him, a blow perhaps more painful than failing a match. There were plenty of opportunities to grow after a defeat, but who knows what would become of Asahi if he no longer had the support of their libero and his friend, Nishinoya. Still, Asahi needed to take this risk because he wanted to prove that he was someone who deserved to see the world with Nishinoya by his side, traveling from place to place together. But most of all, he wanted to become the person Nishinoya could always come back to even when the going gets tough.

Asahi breathed out, finally lifting his head and feeling himself smile at his friends. "Thank you," he said before he left the room.

"You get him, ace!" 

"Good luck!"

Both Daichi and Sugawara cheered for him, sharing in his excitement. They watched Asahi walk through the hallways, holding in their voices to avoid disturbing anyone nearby. Moving forward, the ace himself gripped onto his guitar a bit tighter, trying his hardest to brush off the nerves and confess to Nishinoya once and for all.

Asahi let out a heavy sigh, stopping in his tracks to regain his composure. It was going to happen tonight, and it had to. Then in a minute or two, he strode to the spot where his and Nishinoya's life would change.

____________________________________________________________________________________

"Hey, Ryū. Where are you going? The room's this way." Nishinoya called out to Tanaka, who almost entered a different wing by mistake. The wing spiker laughed and chided himself briefly as a joke. Both of them had just gone out fresh from the shower and were headed back to their room.

On their way, Tanaka spouted one of the most random topics Nishinoya had ever heard of, enticing him completely. The libero didn't think much of his friend rambling more than conversing. He assumed it had to do with the pent-up fatigue from all those penalties their team warranted. 

"Oh, yeah! I forgot to tell 'ya that I gotta get somethin' from the vending machine." Tanaka turned to him. "Wanna come with?"

"Sure thing," answered Nishinoya.

On the contrary, what Tanaka said was a lie purposely made to lead Nishinoya towards the spot where Asahi would confess to him. His role was to take his friend there and leave him alone until the time was right for his departure, that is, so Asahi could take his time to confess. Coincidentally, he got a phone call. What great timing.

Everything had to go as planned.

Tanaka didn't bother looking at the caller ID when he answered his phone, knowing fully well that it was Sugawara notifying him that the plan was sailing smoothly. And although he knew it was his senior calling, he addressed him as his sister to avoid raising any suspicion from Nishinoya.

After the call, they eventually reached their destination. Tanaka rummaged through his pockets then gasped in the manliest way he could. "Shit, dude, I forgot my wallet! I must've left it there in the shower room." 

Nishinoya whipped his head to Tanaka. He scoffed in disbelief, projecting this very accusatory look that would probably make Asahi reconsider his confession if he was in his position. But he wasn't, so Tanaka shrugged sheepishly. 

"Wow. Really, Ryū?" He asked, reaching into his pocket. Whatever, Nishinoya decided. "Let's use mine instead. Just pay me late—"

"NO!"

Tanaka cut him off with a startled shout, going so far as to jog a few steps in the direction of the shower room. Nishinoya stared at his retreating figure, confused. "Dude, it's cool. Don't mind me, and stay right here. I'll be right back!"

The libero couldn't even protest since his friend ran off into the distance. He silently resigned and waited for Tanaka to come back from his search. The bastard had better pay for their drinks.

The hallways were dim, and the light from the vending machine illuminated a small part of the floor. Nishinoya wasn't scared at all. While waiting, he messed around with his shadow until he heard a melodic strum close by the area.

"A guitar?" His curiosity perked up as the strumming continued. He moved away from the vending machine and inched closer and closer to the source of the sound, confirming that it was indeed the stringed instrument he heard. Letting himself be known to the player, Nishinoya took bold steps on his way to greet them. And, if he's lucky, maybe he could have them play a tune for him too.

He had half a mind to brag to Tanaka when the latter returned.

The sounds of the guitar grew louder from around the staircase landing, which led to another floor. The large glass window allowed enough light inside, bringing a soft glow to the area. In there, Nishinoya saw who the player was.

"Asahi-san?" His eyes widened in surprise. The libero certainly wasn't expecting to see his crush in there. Seriously, what were the odds? And it's funny, too, how long before Nishinoya realized it, he had already caught feelings for this man. Sure, Kiyoko was indeed a goddess he absolutely revered, but his heart stuttered and cheered all at once in Asahi's presence. So, if anything, the ace succeeded as the reigning champion of the court battle called love. His mind blanked. Was it perhaps too soon to call it that?

Then, Nishinoya recalled his promise to Asahi—to be with him as his companion. In a way, it sounded like a proposal. He had to admit that as much as he reveled in the prospect of being around the senior, it would hurt to have his feelings go unnoticed—or worse, rejected. Yeah, that would definitely put his heart in a chokehold.

Man, he had to stop himself from thinking too far ahead. What mattered most, at that moment, was the man before his eyes: Asahi, in all his glory, playing the guitar. The libero hardened his resolve, believing he had to have a shot with Asahi. He just needed to keep his eyes open for the ball. In other words, seize the opportunity head-on. And with that, he called out to him.

"Asahi-san!"

The ace stopped playing at the familiar voice and looked down to see Nishinoya at the bottom of the stairs. Almost automatically, his cheeks flared up as he tried to compose himself. But if he was being honest, his head was all over the place.

"Noya." It was all Asahi could say.

With his presence acknowledged, Nishinoya went up the stairs to go over to his senior. "You play well, Asahi-san!" He declared. The statement did nothing to conceal his praise, which sent Asahi's heart into a frenzy. Except, he didn't know that. And yet, the awkward but grateful smile returned to him was telling enough. He continued speaking, "Come to think of it, it's my first time hearing you play!"

"Yeah," Asahi chuckled out of nervousness. "I only play when I feel like it."

"Oh." Nishinoya was a bit at a loss. To fight off the tension, he went towards the windows and leaned on the railing, with his back to Asahi. He glanced at the night sky that surrounded them. Meanwhile, the ace stared at his junior, wondering if the confession's success guaranteed his place next to him.

It was a given that the libero enjoyed spending time with his senior. However, the silence that wafted in the air was far too delicate for laughs and high-energy conversations. There was something else, and boy did Nishinoya want to know what it could be.

He thought of Asahi as he commented, "The moon is beautiful tonight." Nishinoya then turned to face the other, hoping his feelings wouldn't betray him. He might be in love and for real, at that.

On the other hand, Asahi felt his chest tighten from the gentle look on Nishinoya's face. He almost forgot to respond—that is, if what the junior said was actually intended for him to listen to. And so, Asahi settled for a hum, not quite trusting his voice. Still, he had a confession to make, and the night wouldn't last that much longer.

"Shall I play you a song, Noya?" He finally asked him.

Nishinoya's eyes zeroed on Asahi's, and he felt his face heat up from the weight of his gaze. Also, that was the first time someone offered to sing for him. It's insane. He wondered whether or not his senior knew the effect he had on him. But to answer his question—no, he was not about to let this chance slip away. How could he let the opportunity to hear Asahi play pass?

He caught the ball. "Yes. Yeah, yeah. Cool. I'd really like that, Asahi-san." On the inside, Nishinoya felt pathetic. At least Tanaka wasn't there to call him out. Wait, right. He was supposed to wait for him by the vending machine. The libero thought for a second, only to decide that it was the spiker's loss for misplacing his damn wallet.

Asahi gave something of a half-smile. Yeah, Tanaka could wait. He wanted to give all his attention to his senior, who was about to play the guitar.

The ace began to strum the first notes of the song. If he wanted to impress his junior, he had to let himself go of all the doubts he carried and play his heart out. It was a love confession, after all.

It clicked in Nishinoya's mind that the song his senior was playing was none other than A Thousand Years. And at that moment, everything fell into place, something almost straight out of a fairytale. The thrumming of his chest felt light like magic, slowly enveloping him in a trance he understood as love. When Asahi sang the first lines, Nishinoya knew he would never run away from his romantic feelings. 

He wanted to cry, and at the same time, he didn't. His heart was full. And with every note and word, Nishinoya mustered the courage to tell Asahi what he truly felt about him. He changed his mind—he couldn't possibly let his feelings go unnoticed. While he feared risking rejection and losing their friendship in the end, he had to let him know to be with him for much longer. It's crazy, but maybe they could be companions for life who travel the world, only to realize that it was within arm's reach all along. Shit. He had it bad for Asahi.

"One step closer,"

After Asahi sang that line, he stopped, which surprised Nishinoya. He placed his guitar down and straightened his posture, eyes on his world. The silence was heavy between them, and Nishinoya stared back. Just as he was about to say something, the ace spoke first.

"Nishinoya Yū, hear me out." He wore a serious expression.

When the ace called him by his full name, he tensed, unsure of how to react in such a situation. The confusion was evident across his face, but he kept silent to let his senior know he wanted to listen to what he had to say. Seconds passed, and Asahi breathed out.

"We promised to travel together. But will you grant me the chance to be with you as your man?" His heart stopped. No way! There was no fucking way Asahi confessed to him. The shock wasn't about to settle down.

Nishinoya's eyes were blown wide open, his brown irises gleaming like embers. He didn't say anything for a while, and Asahi took that reaction as unease. The ace started to panic internally, wondering if he came on to the junior too strong. He had to do something quickly.

"W-wait, Noya, I'm sorry! Please forget what I just said!" He stuttered, flushed red to the neck from embarrassment as he tried covering up his confession. Oh, how desperately Asahi wanted to turn back time and forget the option of confessing in the first place.

Mind still reeling, Nishinoya was in denial of what had happened. He couldn't believe it! Asahi returned his feelings? His crush confessed to him? He said he wants to travel the world with him as his "man"? Really, the junior doubted anything was real. Maybe he fainted by the vending machine, and Tanaka forgot all about him.

There was one other way to find out. Nishinoya slapped his cheeks, and the sting from it felt hot and sharp, which alarmed Asahi, his face showing concern. As it turned out, he was definitely awake and in the same time and space as Asahi. 

"Noya—"

Nishinoya thought on his feet, so he interrupted without facing him. "Continue the rest of the song." Asahi hesitated but eventually continued playing from where he left off so as to avoid disappointing the junior any more than he already had. This time, however, his voice was shaking. The senior admonished himself for his stupidity until he noticed a second voice join in. It was Nishinoya singing with him.

The impromptu duet left Asahi stunned. The libero may not have the most conventionally attractive vocals. But the way he harmonized with him and modulated his voice sent a rush of sensations that nearly overwhelmed the senior. Regaining some composure, he continued singing but was unsure of whether or not his junior meant anything behind doing such. Asahi didn't want to think of any possibilities to prevent hurting himself in the end. 

Once their duet came to an end, after Asahi played the last notes of the song, everything was silent save for the two young souls catching their breaths. Nishinoya broke the tension. And the senior, clutching his freshly wounded heart, gave in and braced himself for the actual rejection. Or so he thought.

"The last line," He muttered loud enough for Asahi to hear. The libero was finally looking at him, and he spoke more softly than he usually would any other day. "The last line, Asahi-san, that's how I feel for you."

I'll love you for a thousand more .

Asahi set the guitar down and had it lean against the railing. It took a lot for him to keep a calm front, considering the stunt he pulled off for a confession. Then, he processed the words Nishinoya said.

"You do?" He asked almost unintelligibly. 

Without any hesitation, Nishinoya replied, "I do."

The taller guy's cheeks tinted pink as he felt a smile gradually settle on his face. Asahi leaned forward, slowly bending down to take Nishinoya's hands into his. He couldn't fully express how happy he was. A tear escaped his right eye, and he bent down to kiss the smaller but equally strong, reliable hands on top of his.

Asahi was still having aftershocks from thoughts of rejection and then acceptance. Yes, Nishinoya felt the same way as he did. It was a lot to take in, so he held his junior's hands to keep him grounded. Their eyes reflected one another, and they imagined nothing but a hopeful future. Nishinoya took his left hand out to caress his senior's cheek affectionately, tucking the strands of hair to the back of his ear, and Asahi closed his eyes to bask in the closeness of their bodies. He wanted to cherish this moment.

Unknowingly, a pair of lips softly pressed against his. Asahi's eyes were open in a flash, and he might've gone cross-eyed at the sight of Nishinoya giving him a gentle kiss, his eyes closed. The ace felt his knees nearly give out from sheer bliss. But even so, his long-awaited wish finally came true, and he couldn't be any happier in his entire life.

They went in for another. The kiss was short but ever so sweet. And although Nishinoya was the first to move away, both were equally red. Their eyes traveled elsewhere, hearts soaring, knowing they would always find their way to each other. Then, Asahi cupped his junior's cheek so they could face one another again. 

"You're perfect," He said with an affectionate smile, causing Nishinoya to share one himself and chuckle. "So, please don't hurt yourself. You really had me worried there."

"The night bears witness to this moment where I feel alive." Nishinoya beamed at him, ignoring the last line his now-lover said, and, instead, letting themselves drown in young love and intimacy. The night sky shone brightly for them, charting yet another story of a newfound couple in the sea of constellations, hopes, and dreams. Maybe they weren't as significant in the grander scheme of things, but that didn't matter to them as long as they had each other.

That night, both of them had said yes. It was a promise.

____________________________________________________________________________________

When we meet again, tell me you're proud of me.

____________________________________________________________________________________

1:00 PM, Present Time

It's almost time for his surgery, and Tanaka is there to assist him with the necessary preparations. While his friend bustles about, Nishinoya stays still, too absorbed in his world. He tries to collect his thoughts and feelings on the matter unfolding before him, but he can't. His concentration has gone so far off he can't process the words of the persons talking to him. Maybe he's not ready.

"Noya, did you get what they said?"

A familiar voice Nishinoya registers is what snaps him from oblivion. He turns to look at the source, finding a concerned Tanaka. And then he thinks for once, realizing he didn't listen to any of the instructions. But the former libero says nothing to save face.

Sighing, Tanaka sits next to him, searching for the right words that might lift his friend's disposition. He has to because he worries for Nishinoya's health, and the latter can be painfully stubborn to talk into doing something even prior to their arrival at the hospital. Then again, Nishinoya has it rough, and Tanaka understands that his health isn't the only thing that needs healing. But it's the only thing they can do now for him. 

"I'm just scared, Ryū," The man starts, head downcast. "That's all I can feel right now. I don't know what else to say."

And with that, Tanaka feels compelled to say something, but Nishinoya beats him to it. There's a deep-seated hesitation in his brown eyes, an expression that would have been foreign to either man had they not known fear and sadness, and more so, the tragedy of losing a loved one. Tanaka feels his throat go dry.

"Hey...but if Asahi-san were here today, do you think he'd be proud of me?"

The former wing spiker wets his lips and considers what he should answer his friend. He places a hand over Nishinoya's shoulder with his head facing him, an attempt for eye contact, which the other returns after a few seconds of thoughtful silence. Tanaka then reassures him with a smile in hopes of dispelling the hurt eating at him, even for just a bit. He might not be the person his friend needs the most, and it stings, but he knows Nishinoya still appreciates the company. So, naturally, Tanaka has to do his damn hardest to let his friend know he's cared for and that his life matters, hence the surgery. Asahi would have wanted Nishinoya to keep living, too.

"Of course. He'd be so proud of 'ya, Noya." Tanaka consoles him, his words striking a chord in him where it either feels dull or aches. Hope blossoms in his heart, and there's a little shine in Nishinoya's eyes when he finally returns his gaze. He trusts him.

Neither man say anything else. Nishinoya goes back to his solemn state, but he taps his friend's shoulder twice to let him know he's feeling better and lets his hand rest there for a while. With a sigh, he releases the tension inside him. The subtle upturn of his lips reassures Tanaka enough.

They continue to stay silent, and Nishinoya still hasn't let go of his hand. A few minutes pass, he heaves yet another sigh, then he taps on Tanaka's knuckles as a gesture of thanks. Tanaka gets the message just before the nurse calls him for assistance. He gently takes Nishinoya's hand off his shoulder and tells him he'll be right back. As Tanaka takes off, the former libero sends him a smile, but this time, the man sees right through the cracks. He's still confused and in pain, which makes Tanaka falter.

The nurse calls out for Tanaka again, and he does the practical thing to follow her even if he wants to console his friend more. He leaves to do what's best for Nishinoya but not without giving another try at lifting his friend's spirit.

"Hey, you're welcome. Don't forget you got this!" And he departs.

____________________________________________________________________________________

"Just look up at the stars, and you'll see them guide us right back to each other."

____________________________________________________________________________________

Four Years Ago

It was a weekend, and the train station wasn't as busy. The weather was pretty great, too, and Nishinoya felt really lucky he could see his boyfriend off. His lips twitched, threatening to show giddy he was. I mean, heck, they're dating—him and the ace Asahi! How could he keep his joy under wraps? Ha! As if.

And then it hit him again that Asahi was moving to Tokyo for university and would also pursue his career in designing there afterward. Right. But on the bright side, both of them had been looking forward to this. Asahi expressed how he wanted Nishinoya to share his joy now that he graduated from high school. And why would he deny his boyfriend of that? He wouldn't, and his presence in the train station at ass o'clock, when he could be sleeping instead, was proof of his love and devotion. 

As much as Nishinoya wanted to see things in a better light, he couldn't deny that it saddened him to be apart from Asahi. On the other hand, the senior promised him he would come to visit whenever he had the chance but confessed that no amount of trips back could ever compensate for missing Nishinoya's presence and closeness. He even joked about going insane from it (or maybe he wasn't). Nevertheless, the libero would obviously miss him just as much, if not more.

And being the hypeman and boyfriend he was, Nishinoya did whatever he could to encourage his Asahi. Plus, there were so many things to benefit from with Asahi pursuing his plans and career like—his mind went blank. Uh, never mind then. But he understood his senior wanted to give a hand at apparel designing, so he knew it would be good for him to move to Tokyo. A foreboding feeling settled itself in his chest. Nishinoya, for the nth time, realized that his love was about to move away that morning. It couldn't be forever. He just had to wait.

He was going to miss him. A lot.

Nishinoya started to recall playing volleyball with him and thought it wouldn't be the same. His responsibilities as a student increased, which was only natural for third-years. He huffed. That only spurred him to leave it all behind and be with Asahi instead. Though, he knew the answer and could already imagine the disapproving look on his boyfriend's face if he suggested running away together. It wasn't like they'd never see each other. He had to compose himself to catch the ball at the right time. A breakthrough was due in whatever he placed his efforts into, and his relationship with Asahi was no different. There's always a winning chance for the both of them, Nishinoya believed. For one more year, he had to hold out and be patient. It shouldn't be that difficult.

They had a promise to keep.

The speakers blared to announce the schedules for each train before departure. And from that, Nishinoya reminded himself of the reason he came to the train station. He had to see his boyfriend off.

But he couldn't help himself. "You confuse me sometimes." The third-year said, with his eyes squinted. The fresh high school graduate didn't seem to mind the confused and almost accusatory stare. If anything, it was cute.

Asahi knew by heart not to worry Nishinoya. So, he reassured him, having a good idea of what his boyfriend was thinking. "It's all right, Noya." He extended an arm to invite him into a hug, to which Nishinoya went right in and held him tightly. Asahi could melt. "You can make it."

Nishinoya knew they had great faith in each other. However, it should've been him to cheer Asahi, not the other way around. He pulled out of the hug and faced him. Fuck, he was about to burst into tears. He wanted to be on his best behavior for Asahi, but the reality of him moving away came crashing in, and he felt helpless to it. Thinking more positively about the situation became difficult with every passing second. 

He tried to smile at him, but it probably looked like a grimace, judging from Asahi's eyebrows folded. His boyfriend saw through his futile attempt, and Nishinoya cringed. This wasn't supposed to happen.

He focused on the ball, the matter at hand, for they had a promise to keep. So, he proclaimed, "Asahi-san!" and a few heads turned in their direction. He paid them no mind.

"Even if we're far apart, let's look at the stars," Nishinoya's voice cracked in the middle, but he finally wore a smile that outshined his anxieties. It was the same contagious energy he had at court, the unwavering confidence that brought him back to the team. "You'll see them guide us right back to each other."

Had Asahi not known his boyfriend and former teammate well enough, he would have been taken aback by his boldness. But he wasn't, and he loved him for it. More importantly, he understood Nishinoya's message. 

His worries faded, and Asahi decided to seal his part of the promise. He placed a hand on his boyfriend's chest, his heart, then swore, his voice ever so gentle, "I'm always with you, Noya." It gave him strength, knowing he'd come home soon to Nishinoya.

And finally, it was time for him to go as the last call for his train had just been announced. Asahi hated to say goodbye to Nishinoya as much as the latter did to him. So, once more, he leaned in to give a chaste kiss.

When he turned around and started to walk away, he missed his lover, distraught that he couldn't stay and be with him. Asking him to come with him was out of the question, and he supposed Nishinoya had considered that as well but decided against it.

Looking at the distance was Nishinoya, still dazed from the bittersweet kiss. He didn't notice how his legs were working on their own, trailing after the brunette man as he boarded the train. Every step farther from him sent a pang of sadness to his heart.

Soon, the train departed. As Nishininoya watched it longingly, he placed a hand on his chest, where Asahi had his not long ago. He yearned for his touch, but he only had himself for comfort. Asahi had somewhere else to go, and all he could do was wait until the next time they saw each other.

Then, the words Asahi exchanged with him replayed in his head. Those words gave him a sense of warmth. He looked across the empty rails in the train's direction and said:

"Forever and always."

____________________________________________________________________________________

Ping!


The sound of a text message jolted Nishinoya awake. He scanned his surroundings and realized it was still dark outside, and he was sleeping until that point. Processing a little more, he squinted his eyes to locate the lamp on his nightstand. When he flicked its switch on, he found his phone and groggily grabbed it to see who had sent the message.

The time on his phone read 10:17 PM. It was always the time that caught his attention whenever he opened his phone. And he figured that he must've fallen asleep the second he hit the bed. Then when his eyes trailed onto the lock screen, his heart ached.

Nishinoya stared at the picture of their first date. 

It has been over a month and a half since Asahi left. Despite being far from each other, they managed to keep in touch. Depending on one's schedule, they had voice calls or video calls but more often texted, followed by an endless string of 'I miss you's and 'I love you's. They wouldn't have it any other way. 

Most of the messages stamped around the day were from his boyfriend, except the recent one was from Tanaka. He unlocked his screen and immediately tapped on Asahi's contact, revealing a line of messages. His lips curled into a smile as he read them.

[4:15 PM]

Ace ♥: Do your best and have fun at practice. I love you 💕

[6:45 PM]

Ace ♥: Exams just ended. We could talk later now that I've got enough free time.

[7:27 PM]

Ace ♥: Noya, have you eaten already?

[8:32 PM]

Ace ♥: Hope you're doing well 💕

Nishinoya blushed hard as the smile on his face grew exponentially wider while rereading all his boyfriend's messages. He nearly forgot to reply from how over the moon he was. Oh, he's only but a boy in love.

[10:21 PM]
Rollin’ THUNDAAA ⚡: ASAHIII SANNN

Rollin' THUNDAAA ⚡: sorry I fell asleep

He hit the send button, and not long after, another message arrived.

[10:23 PM]
Ace ♥: It's alright, Noya. I'm glad you're okay.


Rollin’ THUNDAAA ⚡: don't make it sound like I came from danger or something ༼ ༎ຶ ᆺ ༎ຶ༽


Ace ♥: My bad, Noya. My bad (╯•ᗣ•╰)


Rollin’ THUNDAAA ⚡:  che (¬､¬)

Nishinoya placed his phone on his stomach and looked at the ceiling. He was happy to be awake and chat with his lover. Missing Asahi didn't lessen, but the little efforts they dedicated to communicating put him at ease. Even so, between this measure or being physically close to Asahi, he'd obviously pick the latter. And boy did he wish to be with him that night.

Another message arrived, and he hastily opened it.

[10:27 PM]

Ace ♥: Is it okay with you if I call now?

The libero's eyes lit up because, really, there's no other answer but a resounding YES. Calls with Asahi were his high, and, no, he could never get enough of them. He would forward to his calls each day, longing to tell the other how much he misses and loves him.

He got out of bed, headed towards the window sill, and opened them. As soon as the warm wind touched his skin, it calmed his nerves. Then, he turned his head upwards to look at the night sky, wishing to the stars for his lover:

He wished that he was safe;

He wished that he was doing well;

He wished that he was with him right now; and 

Most of all, he wished for what was best for him.

It became his nightly routine to voice his desires to the stars, who witnessed their vow. For instance, he would ask them for clear skies and frown if it wasn't. He had come to realize that they don't always grant prayers. Nevertheless, they gave him hope that Asahi would find his way back to him in due time. They knew of their promise. 

As if to remind him of his reality, his phone rang, and he looked to see the caller. It was none other than Asahi, and he promptly answered the call. 

"ASAHI-SANNN!" An energetic greeting came from the libero, followed by the ace's laughter from the phone.

"Noyaaa!" Asahi tried to greet in a similar fashion.

"HOW'S YOUR DAY, ASAHI-SAN?"

"It was exhausting, for the most part, but good. What about you, Noya?"

"...Missing you a lot."

Nishinoya lowered his voice, staring at his empty bed and picturing the times when he and his lover were all cuddled up and ready to drift into sleep. Man, he missed having him within proximity. He liked it even more during the winter, the perfect excuse to get closer.

The libero paused his musings, then concentrated on the person on the phone. He heard a faint howl of wind on his end and assumed Asahi was outside, perhaps looking at the same night sky. His heart skipped a beat.

"The stars are out tonight," Asahi's voice rang again. "What did you wish for, Noya?"

"I wished for you, Asahi-san." Replied the lovesick Nishinoya, whose eyes never left the space he and his boyfriend shared while he was around. Silence enclosed them, but he could hear the clear trudging of Asahi's footsteps until it came to a complete halt.

Asahi spoke to him, "Noya."

"Yeahhh?" He answered, dragging the response. "Asahi-san, what's up?"

The ace chuckled and told him, "Mind looking out of your window for me?"

As if something lit a fire on him, Nishinoya's body jumped in place. There was no way Asahi would visit at such a late hour. He couldn't assume things, but his heart was singing. Slowly, he moved his head outside the window, and his eyes landed on the tall figure at the front porch.  

And, standing there, was the love of his life, Azumane Asahi. He was facing Nishinoya with a lovely smile, his phone still in hand. The stars granted his wish.

Nishinoya didn't have the mind to end the call. Instead, he scampered downstairs, careful not to wake anyone in his sleeping household. As soon as he got out, he saw Asahi's arms wide open for him, and he ran straight for the embrace. He felt alive.

Laughter escaped from their lips, rejoicing that they've reunited. The younger one let go first and smiled at him. Taking a better look at his boyfriend, Nishinoya noticed his blank expression but decided not to comment against it. What mattered was that they were together at last.

He interlocked his hands with Asahi's. 

"Asahi-san, you're here!" Nishinoya said in between breaths, trying to get a hold of himself. A tint of pink was on his cheeks, a clear sign that he was ecstatic over his boyfriend's visit. 

Asahi, however, disengaged his intertwined hand from Nishinoya, causing the libero to look at him in utter disbelief. He tried to reach for his hand, but the ace dodged. When he finally spoke, he felt broken more than ever.

"Am I?" He asked in a low voice, the smile disappearing from his face. There was no life in Asahi's eyes, only a dull and aimless stare directed towards Nishinoya, who dreaded what that question implied. He blinked, and Asahi was far from him, walking away. 

Nishinoya called out for him. "ASAHI-SAN!"

Before his legs could move, a loud ringing emitted from nowhere as his surroundings changed. Nishinoya found himself stuck in the dark, screaming his lover's name. No one was there to hear his cries, and fear crept into his fragile heart. Asahi was gone—forever.

____________________________________________________________________________________

Ping!


The sound of a text message jolted Nishinoya awake from his dream. His eyes wandered, feeling disoriented. He settled for controlling his ragged breathing so he could think more clearly. What was that all about, he wondered and wiped the sweat off his forehead.

As his breathing became steady, he collected his thoughts in silence until his phone rang by the nightstand. Eyebrows creased, Nishinoya grabbed it and checked the caller ID. It was Tanaka, but he needed a few seconds to quell his minor agitation before taking the call.

"Oi, Noya! Where are you? We're gonna be late for morning practice! Get up, man." Nishinoya's throat was dry, so he nodded. Stupid, he chastised himself. He was on a call, for fuck's sake!

The libero then peeled his phone away from his ear to check the time. And it slapped him across the face that there was morning practice! Scrambling out of his bed, he dashed towards his closet.

"NOYA!" Tanaka called again.

He cleared his throat once, twice. "Shit, yeah! I'm heading out already!"

Nishinoya ended the call and hurriedly prepared himself. The heightened emotions he felt from his nightmare lingered as he left home. In spite of that, he didn't have the time to think about it.

____________________________________________________________________________________

"Shit, dude. You sure 'ya good to go?" Nishinoya answered Tanaka's question with a brisk nod, which had slightly put off the wing spiker. It was unusual to see the libero so grouchy, but he didn't point that out lest he starts a fight with him. 

The day rushed by fast, and Team Karasuno was now on their after-school practice. Nishinoya sat on one side of the court with the other third-years during the water break. On the second thought, maybe he should have stayed somewhere else. The stares of the other members pierced him, wanting to get a proper answer for his performance. He couldn't blame them.

Nishinoya's movements were delayed by a significant margin when they had morning practice, and he hadn't improved for the afternoon half. The team members observed this and tried to talk him out of it, but the libero brushed them off and chalked it up to lack of sleep. That wasn't a complete lie since the dream incessantly bothered him throughout the day. 

Practice continued, then the team cleaned the court for the day, ending it on a rather anticlimactic note. Coach Ukai dismissed them, and Nishinoya chose to hang out with the other third-years for a while on their way home. Whatever fragments he could remember from the dream gave him chills, to the point he didn't want to go home yet. And when he did, he ignored the front porch and marched directly into his room. He waited an hour or so, and the panic from his nightmare made him overthink why he hadn't received a single message from Asahi the entire day. 

That evening, it was cloudy and starless. The libero huffed in frustration, then nibbled off the rest of his soda-flavored popsicle. Ennoshita looked at him, contemplating whether or not to voice his thoughts on Nishinoya's poor performance. (But on a different topic, he was impressed with how fast the libero consumed the treat.) The silence surrounding them gave away Ennoshita's concern for him, and, of course, Nishinoya noticed.

"...Had a nightmare earlier in the day," The libero finally confessed, sharply inhaling the cold air while kicking some pebbles on the road. He felt the stares of his teammates on him, and he figured they were listening intently. With a shrug of his shoulders, he carried on. "I don't know. I still feel like shit even though that's just a dream."

Just a dream. A dream that Nishinoya hoped would never come true.

The others tramped along silently, not knowing what to say, but Ennoshita had a hunch. So, he asked, "It's about Asahi-san, right?" Their captain, whose eyes hadn't left the road, didn't turn to look at the stunned Nishinoya. And Kinoshita, Narita, and Tanaka, who had their mouths shut, mouthed an 'oh,' concluding the dream involved their senior. It made sense because, after all, the only person who had a very strong influence on Nishinoya was no one else but their former ace, Asahi.

Holy shit, a psychic! The libero opened his mouth to protest as a surge of questions flooded his mind. However, his quick reaction and prolonged silence proved Ennoshita's guess right. So, Nishinoya had let down his defenses and decided there was no use in denying it. After a few awkward glances and confused fidgets, he came clean about his dream, what he felt after waking up from it, and hoped his admission would alleviate the burden that weighed heavily inside of him, leaving him hollow. 

Some time passed before they all went their separate ways. As Nishinoya walked home by himself, he spared an uneasy glance at the lonely night sky above him. A frown made its way to his face. Although he was able to express his feelings to his teammates, the emptiness hadn't left, but he felt relatively lighter.

Back in his room, Nishinoya hoped to hear from his boyfriend soon. Even if the waiting was agonizing, it helped Asahi commit to his studies at university. Besides, it wasn't all about them. Not always, but he wished for it.

Ping! Nishinoya swiftly reached for his phone with a certain expectancy clinging on to him. Then, he sighed in relief.

[8:15 PM]

Ace ♥: Noyaaa

The libero clasped his phone to his chest, thinking, finally. His tense shoulders relaxed, and he felt like he could breathe after centuries. As much as he hated to think that way, Nishinoya feared something unfortunate had happened to Asahi. A ring, which signified another message, followed and broke him out of his negative thoughts. Truly, what a relief.

[8:15 PM] 

Ace ♥: Where are you?

Déjà vu struck him, recalling the part of his dream where Asahi called him outside his house. He had to get a hold of himself. Otherwise, his expectation would only lead to disappointment in the end. Giving the message another read, he thought of what to reply and ultimately tried to brush off the eerie sensation from his nightmare.

Nishinoya stood by his window and stared at the middle of the street, stalling his reply. Frankly, he wanted to conjure the former ace of his whereabouts but couldn't find the heart or energy to do so. He only needed to know he was safe now.

[8:18 PM]
Rollin’ THUNDAAA ⚡ : Asahi-sannn


Rollin' THUNDAAA ⚡: i’m at home

As soon as he had sent those messages, he shoved his phone into his pocket and went back to bed. He felt drained to the bone. In a few minutes, more rings sounded, but Nishinoya didn't check them until the last one. Then, curiosity got the better of him. He briefly groaned as he pulled out his phone, unlocked it, and read the messages Asahi sent.

[8:21 PM]

Ace ♥: Okay, got it.

Ace ♥: By the way, our exams just ended, and we've got a small break coming up.

Ace ♥: I'll be home there tomorrow, Noya. See you soon 💕

[8:22 PM]

Ace ♥: I miss you so much 💗💗

And with just that, all his exhaustion and nerves were washed away. He felt his heart tug, particularly from the last message. The libero then shot up from his bed and, without any hesitation, dialed his boyfriend's number. It rang a few times before the other line picked it up. After such a day, he longed to hear Asahi's voice.

"Asahi-sannn," Nishinoya called out to him. Although the idea of lying down and just sleeping tempted him, he didn't want to waste the chance of talking to Asahi. And more so, he couldn't contain his excitement, knowing the college student would come home the following day.

Asahi had a relaxed laugh, happy to hear him too, but he stopped to ask Nishinoya out of concern, "Noya, hey, are you okay?" The younger one paused, imagining the worried expression on his senior's face.

"Oh, uh—haha! M'fine, you worrywart. A bit tired from practice, actually." 

"You're not overexerting yourself now, are you?"

"Nahhh," Nishinoya denied with a chuckle and took a breath as thoughts of the nightmare crawled their way into the back of his head. "Didn't sleep much the other night." He could no longer count how many times he had used that excuse for the entire day.

At his response, Asahi let out a sigh. "Was it for assignments? I mean, being a third-year's pretty taxing."

"Nopeeee." The libero answered. However, he was conflicted between keeping the conversation with Asahi light or telling him about his nightmare. He trusted him with everything, but, at the same time, he didn't want to bother his boyfriend over something so trivial. Still, his mouth ran first. "You know—"

"Ah, Noya. My bad. I have to get ready for tomorrow." Asahi interrupted before Nishinoya could say anything about his ordeal, which broke him a little, but he didn't dwell on it. He knew his boyfriend wouldn't hurt him intentionally. "I can't wait to spend more time with you when I get back."

The third-year grinned, his cheeks puffing, and he blushed. "Yeah, me too. I miss you, Asahi-san."

He kicked around on his bed, excited, and then he remembered something that drained the smile from his face altogether. Wait, he thought, tomorrow was a Friday. And on Fridays, he had classes because it was a weekday. No!

"Asahi-san, are you serious? I can't pick you up at the station on Friday!" He whined in frustration, making the other line burst into a hearty laugh. "Don't you laugh!"

The mix of Asahi's laughter and Nishinoya's indignant protests lasted until the former spoke up again. "I want to make up for the lost time, you know?"

The libero mouthed a 'hmph!' in response and teased him. "You big, cheesy baby." The gasp on Asahi's end satisfied him. "You better keep your word, got it?"

"I promise."

"I love youuuuuu so muuuuuuch, Asahi-sannn!"

"I love you too, Noya. So much."

They eventually ended the call after exchanging their sweet nothings. Then, Nishinoya, who basked in the afterglow of their short but precious conversation, stood from his bed and walked towards the window sill. Closing his eyes, he wished for his lover again, hoping at least a single star had heard his plea. 

All he wanted was to be with Asahi.

____________________________________________________________________________________

“I wish you were here.”

____________________________________________________________________________________

4 Months Later

Today would be Asahi's third time back to his hometown in his freshman year. University was a whole different experience for the former ace, tiring most times, but his studies came surprisingly steady. He made a couple of acquaintances and explored some spots in Tokyo, which he would share in his calls with his boyfriend in Miyagi.

But, if he were being honest, he would love nothing more than to stay in Miyagi and be with Nishinoya. He wanted to pour every ounce of his love and affection into their relationship and, most of all, Nishinoya himself. His heart thrummed loudly in his chest of seeing him soon.

Asahi retraced some distant memories from his childhood. He remembered he had made just one wish then, and it was to have his own world, where he could be free to spend the rest of his life being happy. However, wishing on stars placed less interest on him now. He may have tried on some occasions, but he stopped, thinking it was more of an outlet for people to express their inner feelings when they had no one to listen to them. While it seemed like a lonely concept, he didn't mind it. If it worked out for them, who was he to judge or take away the healing effect wishing on stars had. In other words, he considered that these people weren't after the magic of having their wishes realized. If anything, they only wanted to be heard whether or not celestial beings among the stars existed. Huh, he was a pretty imaginative kid.

In hindsight, it made sense that he had some outrageous fascination for the above and beyond. Although he wasn't friendless growing up, he felt like he was searching for something, alone. He became independent at an early age and traveled to places in his pursuit of happiness, coming down to the fact that the free world in his head didn't exist. Maybe he was a realist—a materialist even, but he couldn't stay idle and hope to attain his desires. He continued to see the world for what it was, that is, until a certain excitable brunette came into his life and changed it into the possibility of what it could be.

There was nothing out of the ordinary when they first met. Asahi was his usual self. But unlike the rest of the team, who, he remembered, were trembling from panic, Nishinoya didn't overreact and stood tall (for his height). That left a big impression on him. (Another pun.) Then, at practice, he saw how exceptionally skilled Nishinoya was and thought that he could earn the position of libero. The boy, he observed, was equally amazed by his ace-worthy skills if his praises were anything to go by, which was flattering. 

Time passed, and both of them became a tight-knit pair. However, little did Asahi know that Nishinoya would define his world—imperfect, fun, and, most importantly, free. 

The ace had realized this when the libero, at some point, voiced out one of his wishes was to meet someone like him. Then, somehow, the talk escalates into a small argument about Asahi having too little faith in himself, and Nishinoya wanted him to get out of his pity zone because he had his support. By the end of it, he came to realize that the boy had unwavering faith in him, bringing out an emotion he hadn't felt in a while. It was hope.

Whenever Nishinoya wasn't around, he found himself missing his presence. From there, he started wanting to spend more time with him. And not long after, Asahi wished for him—that opened his eyes. Anything he could have possibly wanted in this world was Nishinoya Yū.

"Asahi-sannnn!"

Nishinoya exclaimed as he answered his call. Simultaneously, Asahi was waiting for the the bus for his way home as the train back to his hometown was under maintenance. The college student felt relaxed from hearing his boyfriend's voice, making him all the more excited to be back in Miyagi.

"Noyaaa." 

"Heyyy! Are you all right over there, Asahi-san?" His energetic squeals radiated from Asahi's phone.

While waiting for the bus call, Asahi told Nishinoya he could expect him to arrive at around midnight, and the latter didn't have to pick him up. His boyfriend pleaded, but Asahi knew he was busier around this season. So, he suggested that the libero should instead save his energy for later when he arrived home. Without so much as a rebuttal, he agreed and told Asahi he better prepare himself for hour-long cuddles.

"I'm feeling a lot more energized now that I hear your voice, Noya. How about you?"

"Che! Smooth talker," The other line crackled, but Asahi caught the joke. "I'm hurt you denied me from seeing you sooner. But other than that, I'm fine, though."

His sarcastic remark reminded the former ace of how insane his persistence was. And at the back of his head, he could also tell his boyfriend was pouting through the screen. Ah, he would fly to him if he could. 

"I know, I know. I'm sorry. I'd also like it if you were here with me now, Noya, but—"

"C'monnnn," Nishinoya grumbled. "Asahi-san, I can wait! Forever, even!"

"Oh, Noya," Asahi smiled inwardly. "It'll be midnight by then, and you need to rest up after a long day."

Nishinoya could care less about that, but a promise was a promise. He would stay home that night and wait for Asahi. Until then, he had ought to make the other bend at his every demand. Maybe in more ways than one. Excuse him.

"Anyway, I'm still meeting you afterward. I'll be sure to make everything up to you, okay, Noya?"

The third-year slumped on his couch in defeat. He didn't have it in him to retort his lover's sappy statement. Hugging his knees to his chest, Nishinoya scoffed, feeling flustered.

"You mean everything you said, right?"

"W-what?"

"Everything, Asahi-san?"

"Wait, Noya. Hold on. I don't get where you're going at?"

"You said so yourself—you'll make everything up to me! There's so much we haven't done together in a while, so does that include—"

"Oh, no . You have to stop right there. Please don't finish that sentence."

A snicker came from Nishinoya while Asahi had to fan his beet-red face to avoid warranting suspicious looks from any passerby. He knew what his boyfriend meant, and the former ace would rather not embarrass himself on the spot, especially out in public. Then, the libero played defensive.

"Huh? What do you mean by 'You don't have to finish that,' Asahi-san? That's mean."

"Noya—"

"Nu-uh!" He piped him down. "I was about to ask if we could include getting lots of those once-in-a-lifetime watermelon popsicles! They're back for sale in Coach's store!"

Well played, Asahi thought. He had to get his head off the gutter, and, thankfully, he brought a face mask, which he wore to cover his otherwise inappropriate and constipated expression. Gosh, Nishinoya didn't have to push his buttons.

A quiet sigh escaped his lips as it was time to board.

"Sure, we can get as many popsicles as you want, Noya." Asahi replied to his boyfriend, who cheered on the other side of the line. He could see him doing an air fist. Standing up, he walked to the queue, which wasn't that long. Their honey-talk had come to a close, and Asahi, as usual, ended the call.

Just before the person in front of him entered the bus, he spared a glance to the sky. Then, he turned back and took his seat by the window seat. It was comfortable enough.

Asahi quickly settled himself down. Again, he looked at the night sky, and his eyes followed the forming clouds, thinking it would most likely rain on his way back. His lips formed into a thin line at such a sight.

"So it's gonna be a starless night, huh?" He whispered to himself.

The bus left the station a little later as the rain started to pour down, landing on the window pane. As the vehicle had picked up its speed, the raindrops resembled tears.

A buzz came from his pocket. Asahi then reached into his jacket and pulled out his phone to see that Nishinoya had sent him a message. 

[6:39 PM]
Rollin’ THUNDAAA ⚡: see you later, Asahi-san! ⌗(́◉◞౪◟◉‵⌗)

Asahi smiled behind his mask, and his fingers hovered over the keyboard, typing out his reply. Before hitting the send button, he took his time to reread their latest conversations before shoving his phone back into his jacket.

[6:39 PM]

Ace ♥: 💗 💗 💗

____________________________________________________________________________________

Nishinoya tossed his body to the other side of his bed as he tried to find the most comfortable sleeping position. Giving up, he moved and sat up, having a once over with his room. Then, seeing nothing, he stood and went to the living room.

He had fallen asleep for quite some time while waiting for his lover's arrival. His brown eyes searched for his phone, and when he found it, he checked the time.

12:13 AM

Next, he looked at the covered sliding glass door and approached it. He pushed a curtain to the side and saw the heavy clouds cast in the sky just as the raindrops began to hit the ground. It wasn't a pleasant sight, Nishinoya frowned. Then, he went back to sit on the couch.

When he sat down, he made quick work of unlocking his phone to see any updates from his lover. After finding nothing, Nishinoya breathed out a long, worried sigh. The phone on his hand felt cold, so he set it to the side, beside him.

Another overcast night. It had been like that for three days now. Nishinoya suddenly reached for the remote to watch the weather forecast, the thought making him feel a bit like an adult, and he turned up the volume. It didn't take long before he got bored.

Apparently, the forecast revealed there was a storm brewing in Japan. The school talked about it for the past few days, but he hadn't paid much attention to them since all he could think of was Asahi's arrival. He was about to turn off the TV until an announcement flashed through the screen. His blood ran cold from reading it.

A truck wreck...

A bus departed for...Miyagi...

His eyes never left the screen, concentrating on the headlines. Nishinoya felt his stomach churn with every second that passed. He steadied his breaths, turned the TV off, and continued to wait for Asahi. After all, that's what he asked him to do, and Nishinoya trusted him. Asahi would come home to him, he reassured himself.

No, no, no. Asahi was all right. He chose not to overthink it.

Picking up his phone, he pressed Asahi's contact and typed out his message, wanting to ask about his well-being. His palms started to sweat, and he couldn't seem to calm himself down. Nishinoya felt his heart rise faster as unwanted questions flooded his head.

If he had lacked the presence of mind, he might've dropped his phone when it suddenly rang. But he didn't, and he immediately answered it after seeing the caller ID. It was his ace, Asahi.

Nishinoya rose from the couch, more than desperate to hear his voice. "ASAHI-SAN! WHERE ARE YOU? ARE YOU OKAY?"

Slow, plodding footsteps and shallow breathing rang from the other line that Nishinoya's fear began crawling up. There was no answer to his question, and the suspense was eating him from the inside.

"I'm all right, Noya," Asahi said, his response delayed, and it bothered Nishinoya how off he sounded. He didn't buy it.

"DON'T LIE!" He cried. "WHERE ARE YOU RIGHT NOW? Please..." Don't die.

Another string of silence.

"ASAHI-SAN!"

A cough. Nishinoya was sure he heard a cough, followed by a muffled groan, which sent trembles down his spine. He couldn't think right, and his fears resurfaced:

A cough?

Asahi-san isn't all right?

Was he part of the crash, after all?

No, he could've caught a cold from the storm!

But what if he was there? Why—

"Noya," Asahi's called him, his voice almost faint. It was weaker and too soft for anyone's comfort—Nishinoya's especially. He held his breath in and waited for him to continue.

"Mind looking out for me?"

At that moment, Nishinoya was hit by the familiarity of those words, but they scared him. Still, he dashed to the window sill and nearly ripped his curtains apart. Then his eyes landed on the person on his front porch. ASAHI!

He wanted to cry out in relief, but when he saw his lover limp towards his doorstep, holding his side tightly, he felt a sharp pain pierce through his heart. Something was wrong. What the hell was going on?

Nishinoya ran straight to the door to meet his ace halfway, dropping his phone to the floor by accident. He knew the impact would cause a crack to form on its screen, but he cared very little about it that moment. Then, as he opened the door, a strong gust of wind rushed in, and he shielded his face with his right arm. When he let it down, Nishinoya froze.

Asahi looked bloodied and battered. From his head to toes, there was blood. Nishinoya eyes the arm on his side, which clutched a wound that needed immediate treatment. He wanted to go there and help him, but his body couldn't move from shock.

"N-Noya," The former ace lifted his eyes to Nishinoya. Although he tried to take another step forward to close the distance, his body gave away, and he fell into his arms.

The rain poured heavily, almost drowning Nishinoya's voice when he yelled, "ASAHI-SAN!" 

He supported their bodies from the floor. Asahi was bleeding all over, which, he feared, came from the crash. Nishinoya didn't know what to do to help him, let alone treat him with what little skills he had for first aid treatment. 

It started to rain harder.

"ASAHI-SAN! PLEASE, LET ME GET THE FIRST AID AND CALL FOR HELP. YOU'RE BLEEDING!"

"N-no. Please...s-stay..." The grip Asahi had on him held him in place.

"NO, IT'S YOU WHO'S STAYING! YOU'RE NOT GOING ANYWHERE, YOU BASTARD!" Nishinoya screamed again, his voice laced with pain, anger, and fear. "YOU FUCKING IDIOT! YOU SHOULD'VE WAITED OR CALLED FOR HELP! WALKING HERE WON'T DO SHIT! FUCK!"

Dammit, Nishinoya begged him to stay. He had to focus. Otherwise, Asahi would—FOCUS!

"STAY HERE. I'LL GET YOU HELP!"

"No..."

"STOP BEING STUBBORN, ASAHI-SAN!"

"Noya..."

Hearing his name in such a weak voice tore Nishinoya's heart. His tears mixed with the rain and soaked their bodies. He felt helpless to the sight in his arms: Asahi's body bled profusely, and it felt cold to the touch. He wanted to hug him tighter, but he didn't want to aggravate the wounds. And it didn't make any sense as to why he went all this way when he could've gotten help. Asahi told him to wait, so he did! Why?

Why must this happen? Nishinoya sobbed. They were alone, under a cold, rainy night. 

Asahi slowly shifted and snuggled deeper into Nishinoya's arms, seeking his warmth. Tears formed in his eyes from the pain that enveloped his body, then his breathing became more ragged. And Nishinoya, who knew what his lover wanted, hesitated to wrap his arms around him. He was falling apart, and the person he longed for was here with him but severely wounded, so close to death. There was nothing he could do but watch in sorrow.

"Why?" That was all he asked. 

Asahi didn't reply, and he tried again. "Asahi-san, please. Let me go and get you to safety. You're injured, and it's cold out here."

"Shhh..." His lover shushed him softly. Then, he let out a chuckle as he buried his face on his chest for comfort. The change of position must've irritated the wounds more because he hissed, which made Nishinoya break into tears again.

"It's warm." He resumed, even though he shivered violently. The younger one was troubled by this, and his heart twinged at Asahi's words. No, he couldn't let his world fall apart into nothingness. Asahi had to live! He had to save him—

"I miss...miss you-u...Noya..." 

Nishinoya stared at him, his heart breaking over and over again. He had to know that, but he continued. "S'c-cold in there...and dark. If I die—"

"NO! No, no. Please, you're not, Asahi-san." His voice shook as he attempted to suppress all his emotions. Death. Oh, how he hated that word most, with the sight of his injured lover. "You're not—" Fresh tears fell, and he could no longer continue.

"You're not..."

Nishinoya struggled to remove himself from Asahi, but it was useless. His clutch on him hadn't ceased.

"P-please, stay."

"YOU'RE NOT LEAVING!"

A sharp pain suddenly struck through Asahi's entire body, and he groaned, then his grip faltered. Nishinoya's fear of losing him was drowning him, like the rain relentlessly pouring down on them. It was merciless. So, this time, he held Asahi close.

Desperate to soothe his lover, Nishinoya brushed off the stray hairs from Asahi's face. His expression grew more grief-stricken when he saw the latter's ghastly complexion with his eyes fully lidded. It didn't help that his breathing gradually turned shallow. And as much as Nishinoya fought his tears, he knew Asahi didn't have much time left. 

The truth pained him. So, he did what he could to ignore those thoughts. Once more, he looked at Asahi intently, just as he had during his confession. And he did so with love, albeit fueled by a feeling of great sorrow. Gently, he played with the damp, brown locks, and a pained smile rose to his face. 

Asahi slowly opened his eyes and saw Nishinoya's expression brimmed with tears that he struggled to hold back. But his smile, despite their circumstance, was ever beautiful. He loved him.

"Asahi-san..."

He had to apologize to Nishinoya. His lips were damp from the rain and felt heavy. Still, he deserved one after all the pain he had put him through.

"I'm sorry...Noya," Asahi spoke softly, trying his hardest to stay conscious as he twitched harshly from the pain. "I...I needed to see y-you..."

That's true. When the truck hit the bus, it had been much closer to Nishinoya's place than any of the hospitals. He couldn't recall who else suffered injuries like his or died from the impact. All he knew was that Nishinoya was waiting for him to come home. It was a foolish choice. Yes, he could have stayed there to avoid worsening his wounds. But, no, the desire to finally reunite with his lover was far greater than his will to hold on to his dying body. He didn't want to waste his breath lying to his lover, so he voiced his truth:

"I'm l-losing time...and...I don't w-want this eith-either..."

Nishinoya's eyes trailed to Asahi's left arm, which he weakly raised towards his chest. He held his breath when he clutched onto his shirt, his heart. At that point, the younger one couldn't stand it, but he was helpless to his lover's plea. He had to listen.

"...whatever ha-happe...please...remember..."

The rain didn't let up. However, Nishinoya understood his words clearly, and, as if on cue, an overwhelming pang of sadness coursed throughout his entire being. And Asahi's hand, which finally lost its strength, was held tightly by his own. Then, once more, his lover opened his eyes and looked at him dearly. 

"Forever and always..."

He kept his gaze until he couldn't. Nothing else came out of Asahi's lips, and Nishinoya felt his heart shatter. Those words were now etched deeply into his mind. His eyes were closed, and the fist he held with his hand sagged, leaving Nishinoya out of breath and gasping for air as the tears streamed without stop. He wanted to refuse the worst, or, what most called, reality. But one look at his Asahi's face could explain what had truly happened.

"...Asahi-san?" He called for his lover, voice cracked. "Asahi-san!"

Nishinoya received no response.

"ASAHI-SAN!"

His world disappeared before him. Nishinoya had lost his world that night, but the rain kept pouring as if it wanted to taunt him for his already broken heart. He placed the lifeless arm down and enveloped the cold body in his trembling arms, screaming at the rain, the sky, and himself. No one would share his agony because who cared about Asahi more than him? After all, he was the one who wished for him to come back home, but at what cost? His life.

He wished for his safety;

He wished for his health;

He wished to be with him; and

Most of all, he wished for a thousand more.

And the promise, what of it? He wasn't alive to fulfill it. Nishinoya cried for the person he loved most, the world that faded from existence. As reality had it, the body in his arms was the single reminder that he had lived. He choked in his tears, pained that Asahi couldn't live the rest of his life as he wanted. And, it was selfish of Nishinoya to wish that, even if he were alive, he would spend it with him. 

The boy sobbed and caressed Asahi's cold face. This wasn't supposed to happen. After four months of distance and waiting, he expected to meet with his loved one happy and alive for this night. It was their first anniversary together as a couple.

Their plans for the future shattered. It was virtually impossible to reach those dreams anymore, for they belonged to Asahi and him. But there was only him left, crying under the rain.

For one last time, he bore his soul. "I-I wish you were h-here."

In the end, it was too late for them. Nishinoya couldn't save Asahi. There was no winning chance, promise, or dream. All he had left were his wishes.

Then, everything else turned dark.

____________________________________________________________________________________

“Noya?”

3:30 PM, Present Time

Nishinoya snaps his eyes open and turns over to Tanaka, who called his name with a worried expression written all over his face. His reaction must've been slow because his friend asks him, "Noya, you okay? You were totally out of it just a while ago."

"It's nothing, Ryū." He looks away, letting out a sigh, as he settles for examining the mini counter.

His monotonous tone implied otherwise to Tanaka, but that isn't the first time he received such an indistinctive reply from him. He guesses that the surgery is making him edgy. If not that, another down day. Even after all his visits, Tanaka feels as though he isn't much help to his friend, which, he must admit, hurts. Nevertheless, he wants to be there at Nishinoya's beck and call.

Unaware of Tanaka's dilemma, the former libero remembers when the news had spread like wildfire. The team learned about what happened that night from a passerby who found Nishinoya passed out in the rain, holding a bloodied body. And when he finally came to, he was in the hospital, with Ennoshita, and the rest of the third years, who came to visit but were instead met with his cries, begging for Asahi.

Nishinoya leaving the club was one of the most heart-shattering experiences the team had encountered, just second to Asahi's passing. They tried to convince the libero to stay until the end of the term, but they didn't force him into it, knowing that the shock wouldn't be easy to bear. And more than that, the school and the team themselves carried so many memories of when he was still alive.


Much to everyone's unvoiced surprise, Tanaka readily accepted Nishinoya's departure from the team. He did, but he was also the last to move on, often staring into the distance when they had water breaks in between training. And Ennoshita, their captain, could only give him a pat on the shoulder. Although the team strengthened their morale for every game they took part in, things weren't the same without the support of their guardian deity.

Back in the hospital room, the nurses excuse themselves so they can make further preparations for Nishinoya's operation that afternoon. Slightly looking down, Tanaka takes a slow, shaky breath, not noticing Nishinoya has his eyes on him. He's about to tell the brunette about their team that offered their prayers and support for his recovery until he hears him speak.

"There is something on my mind, actually," Nishinoya utters. He doesn't want to keep his thoughts to himself for much longer. "Hear me out, Ryū, please."

"Of course..." Tanaka answers and adjusts his seat, preparing to listen to his friend. It always makes him nervous when Nishinoya becomes pent up and guarded, but he knows why, and he's readied himself for anything. Or so Tanaka likes to think as his leg starts bouncing erratically. He wonders, what could it be?

Nishinoya lets out a short laugh, which comes off as tense. "I...want to thank the team—especially you, Ryū. 'Cuz, uh, since that day, none of you guys gave up on me. It must've been hard for everyone...all I thought of was myself when As—when that happened. For that, I'm sorry! Really..." 

Tanaka can't tell whether he's thanking them or saying an apology. Either way, both send a stab to his chest, and he wants to interrupt Nishinoya, but the former libero beats him to it, raising an index finger at him: a signal for him to keep listening. And at his request, Tanaka does just that.

"I want you to know I've thought this through—the surgery, I mean. I'll continue living and move on, too, for sure. Yeah, it's still a lot to handle for me, but it'll get better." He chuckled on the last line.

Rubbing his temple shortly after Nishininoya's piece, Tanaka feels the need to protest somehow, the confusion evident on his face. He doesn't know if his friend means anything else, and should that be the case, he wants the brunette to say it directly. His body language speaks for itself—there's something he hasn't said yet, and Tanaka doesn't want to force it out of him. Oh, he can feel a migraine coming.

And, almost out of nowhere, Nishinoya bursts into a fit of laughter. Tanaka stares at him, bewildered. "Ryū! You should've seen the look on your face—" He laughs again. "Being serious doesn't suit you!" Okay, fine. At least he's smiling now. The sight eases Tanaka to the extent his shoulders relax almost instantly. Still, his lips are formed into a thin line, knowing his friend has more to say.

"Hey, Ryū, I...can do more things once I'm out of this place, okay? Don't worry too much about me 'cuz I'll catch up right away," He turns his head to the window, maybe gathering his words, but he quickly turns back to him, carrying on. "I'll treat myself to good food and—oh! I'll hang out with you guys soon and then go skydiving, or even better—I'll travel the world!" His expression fell for a moment. "...I'm sure that's what Asahi-san would want for me, you know?"

Yes, Tanaka knows. In fact, that's the very name Nishinoya refused to say for a long time. So when he did, his voice faltered. And in that split second, Tanaka saw the sadness behind the hopeful demeanor he displayed. It's been five years since Asahi passed, but Nishinoya stayed there, lost in a world that faded. And Tanaka tries to ignore thoughts of, perhaps, many a time, his friend wanted to chase after his dead lover—to join him. Although he knows the bond they shared ran deep, it scared him to think what great lengths he could have gone through to be with him again somehow.

Tanaka reprimanded himself for thinking too far. Nishinoya's here with him in the hospital. That's all that matters now, and he has to trust his friend. He'll get better after the surgery. He has to.

The head nurse knocks on the door and comes in, informing them that they'll proceed with the surgery. More nurses enter to assist Nishinoya from his bed, and Tanaka moves to the side as not to distract them from doing their work. After that, the head nurse asks for his assistance, to which he complies. Tanaka is slightly distracted even as the nurse guides him because, if he's being honest, Nishinoya's confession was strange.

Really, what compelled him to say those things? Tanaka isn't the type to overthink things most of the time and definitely prefers jumping straight into the action. But, this time, he considered if it was just the influence of recalling Asahi. Nishinoya mentioned him the other day, though. However, it was only earlier that he said his name without becoming withdrawn entirely. He hesitated to speak his mind, but he still managed to do it anyway. So, Tanaka questions why he can't give an explanation for this odd, almost foreboding feeling in his chest, daring to burst. Now he's worried about the surgery.

Nishinoya is about to leave the room, assisted by the nurses, and he looks at his friend, who smiles at him while masking his distress. He wants to hug Tanaka before he goes, but he can't. Instead, the former libero calls out to him, voice high and proud, like he once was in their team:

"RYŪ! LET'S GRAB SOME DINNER ONCE WE GET OUTTA HERE!"

Tanaka fights the tears in his eyes, missing those days when they played together. He chokes out loudly.

"YEAH!"

The nurses politely ask them to keep quiet, and Nishinoya apologizes, his grin cheeky. "My bad, my bad."

Then, they finally part ways. The nurses lead him to the operating room. It's clean—which is a must, of course, for every hospital—spacious and, in a way, familiar. It's like he's been here before.

During the process of injecting anesthesia into his body, just before Nishinoya succumbs to its sedative effect, one of the nurses hears a mumble.

"I wish..." Then, everything else turns dark.

____________________________________________________________________________________

Have a safe journey.

____________________________________________________________________________________

For what seems like an eternity, he finally opens his eyes. Nishinoya scans his surroundings and feels...normal. Or, better yet, alive and breathing as he always has. He doesn't find any significant changes to his body, so what now? Nishinoya keeps searching.

He notices the oxygen tank that should've been beside him for the operation was gone, including the IV drip and the machine. How come? It doesn't make sense.

"Where...am I?" Nishinoya mutters to himself, touching his face to double-check if he is awake. His voice, too, rings clearly in his ears. He doesn't understand what's happening, and he feels the panic rise within him.

"Ryū!" He calls for his best friend, looking around, hoping he's nearby. There's no response, so he gives another try, and much to his dismay, Tanaka's nowhere in sight.

Nishinoya scans more of the place, and, suddenly, he's standing in the local park of his hometown. Why is he here? Silence.

"No..." The scenery is exactly like that day:

The sunset paints the skies in warm, bright colors. Nishinoya sees different shades of yellow and orange, even pink, reminding him of shy smiles, clumsy touches, and watermelon-flavored popsicles. Then, he's looking for someone.

The wind blows, and it feels cool on Nishinoya's skin, juxtaposing the fluttery and sweet emotion that dares to rise in his chest. But, no, that's not it. If anything, his heart bleeds for a conversation of diverse cultures and countries. Oh, and there's Switzerland at the top of the list. Whose idea was it, again? Someone.

Someone once promised Nishinoya they would travel the world together. His uncertainty wavers, knowing that person is only a few steps away. And finally, he sees him—a young man wearing a beige vest over his white, long-sleeved polo, with black slacks to pair. His hair is a dark shade of brown, which flows past his shoulders. Yes, Nishinoya recognizes him.

"ASAHI-SAN!"

The person, Asahi, turns to face in his direction. Slowly, he stands from the bench with eyes shining from a moment's hesitation, then familiarity. At that, Nishinoya lets his tears fall as he runs over to him, to which Asahi reacts with open arms. 

"Nishinoya!"

"ASAHI-SAN!" Asahi almost loses his footing from the force of Nishinoya's hug.

Nishinoya cries his name once more, louder, and the embrace he's in tells him everything's all right now. Asahi doesn't let go, soothing his lover with gentle strokes to the small of his back and kisses to the crown of his head. There are so many things Nishinoya wants to get off his chest, but only coughs come out.

He feels complete again because all that matters is this person holding him dearly, the one he longed to be with for years. Or rather, his entire life. Nishinoya continues sobbing on the crook of Asahi's neck, and the latter doesn't mind, sniffling and crying himself.

Minutes pass, and Nishinoya calms down. He then recalls how he poorly coped with his lover's death, resorting to drinking and, on some occasions, smoking. Ashamed, he hides his face on Asahi's shoulder, which pulls a laugh from the man. It doesn't startle Nishinoya if his lover knows what he's thinking. 

"Noya," Asahi says his name, giving him a quick but tight hug before loosening the strength of his arms. "Please look at me."

When Nishinoya finally looks at him, a pair of soulful brown eyes meet his, and he wants to cry again. But Asahi doesn't let him do that and, instead, cups his left cheek affectionately. His hand is large and warm to the touch, so he nuzzles into it. 

"Asahi-san," He croaks, voice hoarse from bawling. "I missed you so much." His ace makes a soft expression, and Nishinoya can see the tear lines on his cheeks.

"I'm here," says Asahi, holding his gaze. "And have always been. You're brave. I'm so proud of you." Those were the words he wished to hear from him after so long. And to have his lover say them now feels like his world's come back to life.

Nishinoya finds himself wrapped in Asahi's arms again, the man gently rocking him in place. Taking his time, he glances every so often at his lover to reassure himself of his presence. Asahi, on the other hand, waits patiently for Nishinoya to speak.

"Since we're already with each other now, Asahi-san..." He starts slowly, eyes glittering with hope. "Don't you think we can fulfill our promise now?"

Asahi lets an inaudible gasp, trying to find the right words, which the other mistakes for as forgetfulness, guilt, and a flat-out rejection. His eyebrows crease. "Asahi-san...what's wrong?"

Alas, their tender exchange shifts into something sour, and anxiety prickles at Nishinoya's heart.

"Noya," Asahi speaks up. Nishinoya makes a sound of confirmation, urging him to continue as not to expect the worst. Their eyes meet, and he resumes, not breaking the contact.

"You see, I've already seen the world."

Nishinoya freezes. The expression on Asahi's face doesn't change, which breaks his heart. He says nothing else.

"But...but we promised, Asahi-san!" He tells his lover, the volume of his voice rising. He grabs Asahi's arms and shakes them, hoping what he said isn't true.

"We promised each other that we'll see it together, didn't we? Come on, say it!" Tears whelm his eyes, threatening to spill, and he feels as though he'll crumble again. Asahi tries to hold his hands, but Nishinoya shouts, "ASAHI-SAN! Please, say it, our promise!"

But the words his ace says are not the ones he wants. They're different.

"From the highest mountains...to the deepest oceans...the scorching and wintry places...the brightest and darkest too, I have been there." Asahi's voice is rich with emotion as he retraces his solo adventures. He smiles at Nishinoya like when he confessed to him then. "Felt all of the seasons, met different people, and enjoyed lots of journeys. It has always been my wish..."

He lessens his grip on Asahi, and the latter takes his chance to hold them down instead, then leans in. Nishinoya registers warm lips on his own, a soft kiss, which confuses him but doesn't reject. So, when Asahi pulls away, he only stares, waiting for an answer.

"What I mean to say is...Nishinoya Yū, you're the world I wished for and came true."

Nishinoya's breath hitches, and, not long after, he breaks into tears. However, this time, he's not crying from yearning but love. A love that's hopeful; that saves; that wins. In love, they're both reigning champions. That's all that matters to them, two worlds bound by love, with no force that could ever sever a promise for eternity.

He grins, looking at Asahi and his warm smile. They'll reach happiness together, and nothing can stop them. And then, Nishinoya remembers something important.

"Let's go get those watermelon popsicles, Asahi-san." Asahi approved with a nod.

"As you wish."

Intertwining their hands together, they walk towards the beginning of their lives. Together.

____________________________________________________________________________________

"I have already seen the entire world, and that's you."

____________________________________________________________________________________

"Time of death, 5:50 PM."