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By now Stede should be used to bloodshed. It's not something that makes him faint at the sight of it or does it make him scream these days. But when it's your crew at the other end of a vicious fight, losing blood; life, limbs, the fight. Stede can't handle it but he can't pull his focus away from what he has to fight.
Blackbeard, with his eyes boring into his own. When Stede had shown Ed that picture of Blackbeard from his book all those months ago, he could never imagine Ed like that. Glowing eyes behind a head of heavy dark smoke.
As Stede shook under the pressure of Blackbeard's sword against his, he could see those eyes now.
Blackbeard yelled, no words, he hadn't spoke to Stede since he got on the ship. He pushed his sword up, and with the weight of his against Stede's, threw Stede's upwards and overboard.
"You don't have to do this! This isn't you Ed!" A voice in Stede's head counterargues that yes this is Ed, Ed is Blackbeard. "Just put the sword down!"
Blackbeard says nothing just charges. Eyes so bright with anger, vengeance, and...
Stede dodges as much as he can. Between Blackbeard and the fight that was still raging all around him, he was having a hard time finding a way out.
There was the ocean but he didn't want to throw himself over, not when his crew was here. He looks at Blackbeard and his jaw sets, determined, because he sure as hell wasn't throwing himself over when Ed was right here.
Stede now finds himself up against a wall between the stairs to the wheel n the main office. He swallows hard as Blackbeard stares him down.
"Ed, I've had a lot of time to think, and I bet you sure have too!" Stede was talking gently but quick, as he felt his time running out, "And I shouldn't have left you there at the dock, it was wrong of me and I regret it for all my days."
Blackbeard has stopped walking towards him and stands, listening. Which gives Stede a rush of hope,
"We can still go to China. Or wherever, I don't care, Ed. As long as I am where you are, I'll be happy, don't you want to be happy-"
And there it was, a pain so sharp and sincere. Blackbeard was inches from his face now. Face pointed down as he stares at the fresh wound on Stede. The right side of the body stabbed through. As Stede shakes and smiles, laughs with blood spitting out, Blackbeard looks up at him.
"Did..you mean to do that?" Stede laughs again, more blood. Blackbeard's eyes suddenly widen and Stede can see Ed there.
Blackbeard backs off and Stede slides down to the ground, looking to the sword sticking out of him.
He looks to the background. His crew, half he can see on the ground, but the rest still fighting. For what? For him? Someone who was never really a pirate captain to begin with.
There they all were, loyal to the death and Stede didn't want that. He looks over back to Blackbeard who is shocked still.
Like he had no idea who put that sword in Stede. So Stede tells him,
"It's okay, I know how hard break ups can be." His gut twitches in pain and anger cause it wasn't supposed to end like this.
It's not up to them though, is it? Stede looks up at the setting sun and sighs one last time.
Going into the light shouldn't feel so familiar. When Stede opens his eyes and wakes up in familiar sheets, he wonders if it was all dream. But then the day begins the same as Oluwande rushes in, telling him they tracked down Blackbeard.
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Stede looks out to the ocean with his telescope. He was on a rowboat, his ship hidden behind rocks. He didn't want Blackbeard to spot them first.
Anxious, Stede wanted to get a closer look, alone. In case he was caught, he didn't want his crew going down with him. Again.
It bothered Stede how real his dream felt and how much he was feeling it since he woke up. Everything up to him doing this now has all been the same as the dream.
And that made Stede feel sicker than a dog. Cause if there was any truth in the dream, he didn't want his crew anywhere near the ship.
This was his mission alone after all. He was here for his own wants n desires and that desire was a man who killed him.
Well, not really, since Stede wasn't dead at the moment. Stede doesn't actually think Ed meant to stab him so fatality.
Mistake, perhaps. The look in his eyes had regret in it, that had to mean something.
But Stede wasn't going to risk his life again, he'll have a better plan this time around.
He'll go solo, stalk Blackbeard, get him alone, and then they can both talk it out without all that chaos going on around them.
If anything, Blackbeard probably stabbed him because of the fight going on, all that energy could have motivated his stabbing hand.
Stede puts the telescope away, and sets his heart on getting closer since he hadn't spotted Blackbeard yet.
A few more feet forward shouldn't hurt.
As he let the rowboat settle, he sets the telescope up again.
When he looks through it again, he can see Blackbeard.
His figure stands with another, that fucker Izzy probably.
Then before Stede could move to miss it, a cannonball comes flying towards him and hits.
Stede, this time, wakes up annoyed. He didn't even get anywhere near Blackbeard. He died alone on a dammed rowboat.
He gets up from his bed before Oluwande even rushes in and when he does he pauses at Stede's glare.
"Uh...good news, we found Blackbeard."
"I know, " Stede mumbles bluntly as he walks off to get changed.
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Alone again. This time, Stede watches from a safe distance. From the rocks. He'll wait for Blackbeard to leave his ship for supplies or something and then follow him.
Corner him and talk to him.
His hands wring out of the telescope, cause surely, Blackbeard wasn't the one who shot the cannonball at him. Was probably that prick Izzy.
Had to be.
Stede could see distant figures walk all around the ship but none were Blackbeard. Stede, even from this far, could always tell his figure apart.
He felt restless and put down the scope. He can't just wait for Blackbeard to move or leave. He'll have to find a way on board. With his crew, the first time, it was easy cause Blackbeard knew they were coming and allowed it.
This time he'll need to sneak on and he doesn't fancy himself someone who can do well at sneaking around. So even though he wants his crew nowhere near the boat, he'll ask for help.
From Jim, of course. And of course if Jim goes, Oluwande goes, and if Oluwande goes, Lucius gets curious and wants to go, and suddenly Black Pete hears about it and wants to go. Then the whole crew is going.
Stede feels sicker than before, he holds himself over the side, just in case he were to throw up.
He wish he could, throw up all the emotions he's having into the ocean and all the sea's creatures could eat em up.
Buttons is besides him, saying something about drawing near. Stede doesn't want to die again, and when he looks around at his crew he yells,
"I'll meet them alone then you all will follow after," Stede can take his death but he can't take seeing his crew lose again, "I'll be fine."
"I'm not so sure that's a great idea, Captain," Buttons is eyeing him up, "Heard Blackbeard's been more ruthless ever since he left us."
Stede frowns at this before shaking his head, "I will be fine! I'll be back before sunset." He says that to the crew but turns to Buttons in a whisper, "Leave if I am not back by sunset, turn the ship and go."
Buttons looks at him and nods, "May yer find a way."
Stede's not sure exactly what that means but hopefully, it means Buttons believes he'll find a way to Blackbeard, back to Ed.
Then he's off on his own, hoping that a cannonball isn't his demise this time around. As he rows closer to the ship, he sighs in relief as he still lives n breathes.
Going up the rope ladder, Stede could feel his heart thunder in his chest. He wasn't sure what was laying in wait on the other side. Then it grabbed him. A hand pulled him over to the other side and threw him to ground.
Fang and Ivan were staring him down. Blackbeard's whole crew was there, swords ready like Stede was a whole Navy ship. Izzy was there and right next to him, Blackbeard.
Even after the first time when he saw Blackbeard again, after months of going to places, threatening people for info, crossing rapids and ruins to find his ship, finally, he's in front of him, man to man, and his breath is taken away every time.
Cause his beard is back full force and it's grey, dark and beautiful. Stede really wished when they first kissed, that Ed still had the beard. A real tragedy that it was ever taken in the first place.
Stede wonders if Blackbeard got revenge on the ones who took it. He wonders so much, he almost goes to ask outloud but Izzy speaks first,
"What do you want, Bonnet?"
Was it not obvious? Stede can be more obvious.
"Ed, of course."
The air tingles with tension. Stede could see that Izzy wanted to kill him outright, there and now. But Blackbeard didn't say anything, just staring, even with the beard back, he still wore thick paint over his eyes.
Those glowing eyes in the dark.
"Can I strike him while he's down, Captain?"
Stede looks at Blackbeard who doesn't hesitate, never really was the man to do so.
Always took and got what he wanted.
Except Stede. In the first time in months, Stede hears Blackbeard speak and answer,
"Go ahead."
This time, Stede wakes up furious and before Oluwande is at his door, he's going down the hall towards the deck. Wearing just his night gown he jumps onto the rowboat and starts rowing towards Blackbeard's ship.
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Blackbeard was sure the first one was a nightmare. Him stabbing Stede, Stede bleeding, dying on his ship. Then he woke up again back in his bed, no dead Stede on his deck.
But Izzy comes to him again, saying he spotted him not too far from here.
This time in a rowboat. So stupid, so out in the open. When Izzy suggests a cannonball, Blackbeard shrugs and gives the go ahead. Cause he wakes up again, all a dream.
Again Stede is in the rowboat but coming aboard. Blackbeard allows him to live these few moments before letting Izzy kill him.
Then he wakes up again, and he's choking someone.
He lets go and in the sunrise light through the window, he sees Stede staring at him with wide eyes.
He had to be a dream. Stede being there, on the floor, shocked, but happy to breathe again.
"I didn't..mean to scare you..." Stede rubs his throat gently, it's unfortunately not the first time he's been almost choked to death, "I came here furious you know, but then I saw you asleep and the fight..." Stede sighs and looks to Blackbeard, "..left me."
Blackbeard frowns, "Why are you mad?" What right does Stede have to be mad when he didn't show up at the docks?
"You...," Stede laughs, shakes his head, "It's crazy." Then he's laughing like it's a inside joke and when his laugh dies down, he looks to Blackbeard, forlorn.
"I wanted to kiss you when you had the beard."
When Stede stands and reaches up into his beard, he allows it. He allows it so much, the hold is overwhelming.
Stede kisses him, soft gently, sorry, I'm so sorry, the kiss was saying.
Ed could cry right there, maybe he was, he didn't want to open his eyes, cause this had to be a dream, right?
This couldn't be real, Stede kissing him, holding him so soft under his beard.
But when he opened his eyes as Stede pulled away, he was still there.
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So maybe Stede never tells Ed about what really happened that day. The resets, and deaths. He will always want to know why it happened and why Ed had killed him those few times. So Stede comes up with a plan to ask him someway without bringing up suspicion.
"If we had ever ended up fighting, Ed, would you kill me?" He asks as casual as the winds in the night air. They were drinking wine on the mast deck, and Stede took a nice smooth sip of his.
While Ed choked on his.
"What? What the fuck, Stede?" Ed is staring at him in alarm and concern.
"It's hypothetical."
Ed was still staring which Stede stared back and frowned, "Humor me? "
Ed blinks and leans back, then hums, "Back when I was angry with you and wanted revenge, I would've. I think...I think I did.."
He goes quiet as it was Stede's turn to stare at him in alarm and concern, "What do you mean?"
"I don't know, man, I had these really awful fucked up dreams about..." He didn't want to confess it but it's better to be open, "Where I killed you like multiple times and I hated it!" He takes a swig of his wine to drown out the regret he feels from those dreams.
Stede is just staring at him, so he keeps going,
"The first one you came up on my ship all cool, and pirate captain like. I was amazed but really pissed at you, man." He shakes his head, "And we were fighting and I stabbed you. On the wrong side. You were dying and I couldn't save you. I had thought this is how it ends isn't? But I woke up, it was just a nightmare. Then the next two times I let Izzy kill you cause if you were going to keep dying in my dreams I didn't want to be the one doing it."
He looks to Stede, "The one killing you.."
Stede looks away, guilty. Why?
"Ed," Stede is messing with his wine glass, nervous, "Those were real."
"What?"
Stede looks over at him, "The stabbing, the cannonball, and letting Izzy strike me while I was down, all real. I don't know how and I don't think I'll ever know why but I relived that day those few times till the last time when I-"
"You kissed me," Ed finishes it for him and they both sit there, silent, thinking.
"Was it just fate that brought us back together?" Ed asks, not specifically to Stede but Stede answers with a laugh,
"Did all the hard work I did to track down the mysterious aloof Blackbeard mean nothing to you?"
Ed laughs and smirks over at Stede, "Maybe it was witches."
"Cats! Frenchie could be right."
"Our true enemy the cats."
They both laugh, and leave it at that. As they sit there with hands entwined at the center of em, the full moon hangs high above.
And down below them, Buttons is soaking it up. He's talking to a new seagull who's been around lately.
"You see without me, and me safety spell, we would all be dead," Buttons moves to a new pose to soak up more moonlight. "Ay, I should be captain but I was never much of a leader, you know?"
The seagull squaks in agreement and Buttons nods as he moves again, happy to be back in his favorite soaking spot.
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