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It was junior year, and Benny was failing AP stats. It was probably his fault. Math was never his strongest subject, yet here he was, in the highest level Whitechapel high had.
It looks good on college applications. That's what he told his grandmother when she asked why he'd chosen the harder course.
I like the challenge. He told Sarah after she caught him struggling with his homework in the library.
The teacher's really hot. He justified it to Rory when his friend had gaped at his filled notebooks, plural.
Of course, these were all the things Benny told himself to ignore the real reason he was in that hellish class.
Ethan just had to be ridiculously smart.
His best friend was gliding through the curriculum with ease and genuine interest. It would had pissed Benny off if he didn't enjoy seeing the goofy smile on Ethan's face while he explained their latest lesson. Ethan went over everything with him, helping him through the homework, and studying for every test. Still, Ethan's 96 in the class dwarfed Benny's 57.
So, here he was, cramming for their midterm, hoping he could end the semester with a skin-of-his-teeth passing grade. If he was going to get the D, he needed at least a B on the test. He may as well have needed to find Atlantis.
Benny leaned back in his desk chair, head pounding. It was Friday. At seventeen, he thought he'd be going to parties, on dates, or at least having fun. Ok, maybe parties was a stretch.
He tapped his highlighter against the desk. All the numbers were blending together, and he'd forgotten half the equations.
His computer lit up with an incoming video call, making him jump. Ethan's name popped up on the screen. Benny reached over, clicking to answer.
Ethan's face filled the screen. "Hey! What are you up to- oh man, you look awful. Are you okay?" Ethan's brows furrowed in concern.
Benny grimaced. He was hoping to hide his stress, but after studying for hours, there was no hiding it.
"I'm fine. I'm just working on stuff for class. What's up?" Benny tried to wave off Ethan's worry. Though, it did make his chest feel that familiar tug it always does when Ethan shows how much he cares.
"Class stuff? What class?" Ethan watched him carefully.
Benny sighed. "Stats. Just doing some studying. It's no big deal."
"For the midterm? Oh man, why didn't you say so? I'm coming over. I can help," Ethan said with no room for argument. He was already getting up and gathering his things.
"Hey, you don't have to. I'm perfectly capable of going over my notes," Benny assured.
Ethan just shook his head. "Don't even, I'm on my way." He gave a quick wave and ended the call.
Benny sunk in his chair with a groan. Taking a class to impress someone didn't really work if they had to help you through it.
Not that it mattered. Ethan was his best friend. You don't need to impress your best friend, no matter how in love with him you are. That part was shoved deep down, right next to all his other problems that don't need to ever see the light of day.
It wasn't long before he heard the door and footsteps climbing the stairs. He spun around in his chair to face Ethan as he walked in.
"Still breaking into my house I see," Benny teased.
Ethan rolled his eyes as he dropped his book bag to the floor. "It's not breaking in if you gave me a key."
"For emergencies, E."
"I've seen your test scores. This is an emergency," Ethan countered.
Benny winced. "Ouch. I see we're holding no punches tonight."
Ethan laughed, sitting on his bed with his notebooks in his lap. "No time for coddling. Come here. It's easy if we can both look at the same thing."
Benny gathered his notes, crossing the room to join Ethan. He was used to being close. He didn't get flustered around him like some middle school crush. It was just Ethan. If anything, it felt weirder to be apart.
Plus, stats and his impending failure really could kill any mood.
They studied for hours, going over every unit and all the previous tests. When Benny's highlighter reached its premature demise, he decided it was time for a break.
"Pizza. We need pizza." He closed his notebook with a satisfying slap.
Ethan gave an amused huff. "I could go for some food."
"The usual?" Benny asked as he got up and stretched.
"Of course," Ethan answered, rolling onto his back and relaxing.
"Hey, don't get too comfortable. I still don't understand unit four, and you're my only hope." Benny grinned, calling the pizza place down the street.
"I can just crash here, and we can pick up where we left off tomorrow if you're not busy," Ethan offered.
"Sounds great. I'm ready to go back to ignoring my problems and play mind numbing amounts of video games. My brain is totally fried." It wasn't that much of an exaggeration. Benny felt like he could barely put one thought in front of the other.
Ethan laughed. He sat up and gathered all their notes to dump them on Benny's desk for the night, then went to set up Knights of Ninjitus V.
Benny ordered, mindlessly flipping through the notebooks now stacked beside him. He paused on a page where Ethan had doodled in the margins, smiling fondly down at the scribbles. He turned as the call ended, and Ethan looked over at him.
"What's got you all smiley?" Ethan raised a brow.
"Nothin' really. I just love you." Benny shrugged casually then froze.
I didn't just say that. That would be crazy. I definitely didn't just say that.
Ethan’s grin faltered. He blinked.
Shit. I really just said that. How brain dead am I?
"I uh... I mean," Benny stumbled over his words. "Like- of course I love you. You're my best friend." He let out a nervous laugh.
Ethan watched him carefully. "That's not what you meant, though. You're doing that thing."
"What thing?" Benny tried not to sound panicked.
"That thing where you freak out when you try to lie. You're lying." Ethan sounded surprised that he came to the conclusion.
Benny scoffed, waving him off. It was too over the top, but he couldn't stop. Ethan really did know him. "You're being paranoid." It was a weak defense, and they both knew it.
Ethan took a step closer. "Benny... do you... are you in l-" He started, but Benny turned on his heels and made a beeline for the door.
Unfortunately, he was never a graceful guy, and he immediately tripped over his own feet, tumbling forward.
There was a minute of stunned silence.
"Did you just try to run away?" Ethan looked down at him with a bewildered expression.
"No, that would be crazy. I just," Benny looked around for a moment, searching for an excuse he didn't have, "ok maybe I did." He sighed in defeat, hanging his head forward.
"You've faced vampires, all kinds of monsters- god even demons, and this is what you run from?" Ethan shook his head in disbelief.
"By your side."
Ethan paused. "What?"
"I've faced all that stuff... by your side." His eyes were glued to the floor, unwilling to meet Ethan's gaze. "That's the only time I'm brave."
The silence hung between them, heavy with dread and anticipation. Benny considered a second attempt at running, maybe his first plan wasn't so ridiculous. Anything seemed better than this. Waiting for the rejection, the awkward pity that would grow into a distance he could never repair between them, Benny tightened his fists.
"Get on with it!" He snapped. He knew it was defensive and harsh, but he hoped it would hide the tears stinging the corners of his eyes. "Say it's ridiculous. Say we're better off as friends. Hell- say you hate me. Just... say it." His words ended more like a beg.
It was ridiculous. A slip of the tongue. Such a small mistake that would take down a lifetime of friendship and break his heart all in one foul swoop.
"You're an idiot," Ethan said.
Benny winced. "Damn, way to be nice about it, E."
"You've always been brave."
Benny paused. "What?" He looked up at Ethan and was met with an expression he didn't quite understand.
Ethan's brows were drawn together like when he was focused, and his lips were pressed in a thin line like when he was frustrated.
"I've wanted to run from every fight we ever got ourselves into. You always stay. You always want to help. Benny, you've always been brave," Ethan continued.
Benny got to his feet slowly. "I always had someone to fight for," he explained.
Ethan's expression softened. "I need you to say it."
He looked at him with confusion. "Say what?"
Ethan seemed nervous now, but there was a determination in his eyes. "That you love me."
Benny swallowed stiffly. He searched Ethan's face for further explanation, but he was holding back, focused on this request.
"I love you." It felt like a weight lifted off his shoulders and settled immediately in his gut. He pressed on. "I'm in love with you."
Ethan watched him for a moment before the words fully had their time to sink in.
He surged forward with a speed that took Benny by surprise. It was a hug unlike any before it. It was tight and there was an air of desperation. It left Benny reconsidering just how flustered Ethan could make him with his proximity.
"E... does this mean..." Benny can't find the heart to finish his question because if it doesn't mean what he hopes he's worried it'll kill him.
"Yes. Yes, Benny, I love you too," Ethan responded quickly, holding on tightly.
Benny felt his heart pounding in his chest. He grabbed Ethan's shoulders, pulling him back so he could see his face. Ethan was flushed, the red across his nose reaching all the way to his ears. Benny took his face carefully, resting his palms on either side of Ethan's jaw. He threw caution to the wind.
Ethan loved him.
He pressed their lips together in a moment that would burn itself into his memory. Ethan's arms were still wrapped around him. His world lit up. It felt like magic.
It really felt like magic.
Benny opened his eyes. His hands were glowing a bright gold. He cursed.
"What's wrong?" Ethan blinked slowly, looking around. His eyes grew wide.
Benny sputtered. "I'm sorry- shit I think I just freaked out or something. I-"
Ethan interjected, "Benny, look."
He froze. He dragged his attention away from his glowing hands and saw the state of his room. All of his stuff was floating just above where it usually resided. All of his stuff. Including his bed.
Ethan laughed.
Benny shot him a serious look. "This is not funny! I don't know how I did this! Or how to stop it!"
Ethan grinned at him. He leaned forward and pressed another kiss to his lips.
It shouldn't have surprised him, but Benny's eyebrows shot up before he leaned in to reciprocate.
A minute later Ethan pulled back. Benny slowly opened his eyes and a smile spread across his face.
There was a crash around them and Benny was forced back to reality. He looked around and saw everything back where it belonged, mostly.
"How-"
"I figured you just needed to calm down," Ethan explained with a grin.
Benny stared at him for a moment before laughing.
"God, our lives are so weird." Benny groaned.
"Yeah... but at least we have each other."
Benny smiled fondly, looking back at his best friend. "You're such a nerd."
"And you love me," Ethan countered.
"And I love you," Benny added.
The doorbell rang downstairs, pulling them from the moment.
"Pizza's here."