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Fall nights when the rain is pouring and Dave is so painfully aware of the beating in his chest are always the worst.
It'd been like this for a long time, he recalled. Fall in particular was his least favourite season. There were too many agonizing memories associated with the season. Too many memories that left him curled up on the floor, oversensitized to most everything and wishing so dearly that he could cry, that he could breathe, that he could do something to stop the all the overwhelming feelings compressing his heart.
This wasn't quite one of those nights, but he did find his thoughts beginning to drift off into the deep end while gazing out the window. There wasn't much to look at- just plain and grassy open fields that appeared as a blur of shapes through the grainy glass. Despite that, it was nice to look at. Dave didn't associate it with anything negative. It reminded him of warm nights, in fact. Warm nights wearing Jack's cozy orange sweater, the sleeves pulled down just enough for his fingers to peek out; A warm mug of coffee and cream seated perfectly between his hands, gazing out the very same window while some late-night television show hummed softly in the background; Jack passed out beside him, snoring quietly after a long day of work at Fazbender's.
Tonight though, it was just Dave, sitting criss-cross on Jack's older plaid couch, absent-mindedly fidgeting with a stray piece of fabric peeking out from one of the cushions. Jack was asleep upstairs, and although Dave knew he didn't mind being woken up this late, he still felt bad about it. Despite them living together for about a year now, he had a hard time coming to accept that he could come to Jack for anything- that Jack truly cared about him and loved him- and often opted to not bother him.
He reckoned Jack would probably wake up soon, though. There was a crackle of light outside, shortly following by a low booming, signs of a thunderstorm forming. Jack couldn't sleep through storms, mostly due to him being a light sleeper. He overall didn't quite like storms, while Dave somewhat enjoyed them. He'd become very accustomed to them throughout the years sleeping in the streets on cold, stormy nights. It was something that brought him a sense of familiarity, despite the worse memories associated with it. He needed that familiarity.
A soft sigh escaped his lips. Maybe he could make himself some hot cocoa. It was starting to get a bit chilly inside the house, and with the house's heating currently being broken, they only had a couple of electric heaters scattered about. Dave didn't like how loud they were, and the red light on the one in the living room flickered whenever it was plugged in, which made him extremely uncomfortable and sometimes slightly paranoid. He knew there was no reason for it, but unless he had Jack with him, he couldn't bring himself to turn the heaters on.
He could get a blanket, but all of theirs were in their bedroom and again, he didn't want to disturb Jack. Dave was just making excuses so he wouldn't have to move from his spot. There was another crackle of light, distorted through the window, and Dave decided he could wait until Jack got up. It wouldn't be too long now. Hopefully.
Dave let out a shaky breath. The window's job of distracting him from his thoughts wasn't doing so great anymore. He needed Jack. He knew he could wake up Jack, he knew he should wake up Jack, yet he made no move to get up. His fingers twitched, losing grip of the fabric he'd been messing with. His breath hitched at a boom from outside, leaving a ringing in his ears.
He needed Jack.
He was close to finally forcing himself up when a rough, tired voice rang from the doorway.
"Davey?"
Dave's eyes flicked over to Jack, his lips twitching upwards into a weak smile.
"Hey." His voice cracked and his smile faltered. Jack shuffled over to the couch, plopping down next to him and wrapping an arm loosely around his waist.
"Hey, bunny. How long have you been awake?" He tilted his head slightly as he spoke, locking eyes with Dave. Dave shifted uncomfortably- eye contact wasn't his thing whatsoever, but he'd been making more of an effort to maintain it with Jack during conversations. He shrugged.
"An hour.. maybe?" His voice wavered, and he ended up shifting his gaze back to the window. Jack's gaze followed.
"You doing alright?"
Another shrug.
"It's ok. I'm here now. You want some hot cocoa?"
Dave's eyes lit up at the suggestion. "You read my mind, Sportsy."
Jack chuckled. "Or, I just know you well enough by now to know how you are during these kinds of nights."
"Fair 'nough."
'You wanna come with?"
"...Yeah."
The two got up, still linked together by Jack's arm, and made their way to the kitchen. Jack flipped the lights on, and Dave winced at the sudden change of light tones.
"Sorry," Jack murmured while squinting, his eyes getting adjusted.
"'S ok."
They stood side by side while Jack prepared two mugs of hot cocoa for them, making sure Dave was included in the process by having him hand him the stuff needed. It was relatively quiet, the only sound being the slight hum of the lights and the rain pelting against the windows. It was comfortable.
"Do you think the power's gonna go out?" Dave mentioned after a particularly large strike of lighting hit just outside the house.
"It better fucking not, I have stuff to do in the morning and I can't focus for shit at Fazbender's." Jack's tone was lighthearted despite the bit of annoyance he displayed by the thought of the power going out. "Plus, no power and no heat is just bad luck. I've been having a pretty good lucky streak lately, don't want it to stop."
Dave listened contently as Jack went on a tangent about work, how things had been going and all things Fazbender's. He handed Dave a mug of hot cocoa, grabbing the marshmallows from the cabinet and heading back to the living room with Dave while still not stopping to take a breather.
Yeah, this was exactly what Dave needed tonight.