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“I have three confessions to make, one confession each letter I write.
My first letter, my first confession is that I’m in love with you.
I love you in ways I didn’t think I could ever love someone.
Speaking to people, I can do that but emotionally, emotionally speaking to someone with what I truly think is something I’d never think I find.
To trust someone so deeply that I trust that even if my feelings are never returned that you’ll still be kind to me after it.
To risk awkward moments in the future for the small chance that maybe, maybe it isn’t just me that fell hard on the ground.
To risk a broken heart even if we both feel the same in the beginning because I know you’re worth it, worth a possibility of awkward moments in the future, worth the possibility of a broken heart.
I enjoy the conversations we have.
The talks.
The trips.
The touch.
The memories.
I’m in love with you and I’m happy it’s you because I don’t know who else it could be but you.
Would I call us soulmates? No. I wouldn’t.
Soulmates would mean fate, some higher power chose for us, chose for me to fall in love with you.
No, I want to believe that fate plays no part in any of this. That I fell for you because I chose to, because you to me are someone worthy to love and deserves it and I want to be that someone.
And I hope, deep down, that you think the same of me.”
The letter hung limply in Lila’s hand. The neat grey envelope she teared into to read the letter in her hand laid sadly on her desk. She ignored the buzz from her phone next to her and kept rereading the letter.
It wasn’t for her, she knows it wasn’t because she had stolen it off of Marinette’s desk during lunch but she couldn’t help but flush at the words.
It was a confession, a written confession on a white piece of paper that was neatly folded in a clean grey envelope and sealed shut with wax, a red tulip encased with the wax.
Who had written it?
She went through the list of people in her class that could have written it.
Written it for Dupain-Cheng of all people.
No one came to mind and her mind kept trying to come up with scenarios that could help her find out who.
There could be many plans but all of them could either go wrong or right depending on who the writer was.
Maybe Marinette was the writer?
Would she leave such a thing in the open? The class wouldn’t open it but they’d ask about it.
Is the letter to Adrien?
It’d make more sense, Marinette had written this to Adrien, a declaration of her love.
The small plan quickly formed in her mind, looking for a black pen, blank sheet of paper and white envelope she copied down most of the words and sentiments. Placing it in the envelope, not sealing it shut just yet she throws Marinette’s letter in the trash.
She goes to sleep, the white envelope in her bag waiting to be gifted.
————————
“Alya!”
She runs towards the blogger, the envelope in hand to be shown to its first witness.
“Hey girl!”
Handing the letter to her she waits for Alya to read a few lines before speaking.
“I'm thinking of confessing to Adrien and I wanted to know what you think of the letter! I spent all month working on it and I think it’s ready.”
She rocks on the balls of her feet, watching Alya’s expression become confused before a small smile slides on while she hands the letter back.
“I think it’s awesome…but I feel like I read it somewhere.”
Lila tries not to cringe, there would be a chance Marinette would have Alya proof read her confession.
“Really? God I hope not. I've been working on it for months now! I tried to be as original as I could.”
Seeing Alya bite her lip before sighing and smiling at her she knows she won.
“Lots of people think similarly, maybe this was one of those moments, anyways I think it’s perfect you should give it to him!”
Nodding finally placed it back in the envelope, sealing it shut.
Walking into class Lila’s attention is caught by Alix who seems to be punching the air, while Kim and Nino cheer her on.
Alya easily slides next to Nino and it’s only then does Lila see the small bouquet of different colored flowers sitting neatly in Marinette’s arms.
“Telling Mari that whoever is trying to win her affections has to go through us first, as childhood friend law states.”
Alix is still kicking the air while Nino explains more to Alya about her own ‘best friend laws’ , one she overheard being able to join in the battle with them.
Rose is leaning towards the bouquet of flowers, Marinette holding one of the blue flowers.
“A blue rose, it means ‘Attaining the impossible.’”
Getting closer she tries to overhear their conversation.
“This one here-“ Rose points to small multiple bundles of purple flowers, “that’s a heliotrope, it means eternal love or devotion while this one-“ softly caressing a large pink flower she smiles, “this one is a Camellia, it’s pink meaning ‘longing for you’”
Rose keeps the small definitions going for each flower.
“A white Camellia, ‘you’re adorable.”
“White Clovers, ‘think of me’”
“A Holly means Defense or domestic happiness, with how the bouquet is so far I’d say domestic happiness.”
“Iris means a lot, faith, trust, wisdom, hope and/or valor.”
Each flower keeps the red shade of blush on Marinette’s face and when the classroom door opens Lila turns to see both Adrien and Felix enter the class.
Rose smiles at them waving before restating what the multiple bundles of small purple flowers were called.
“Flowers? I’m curious who’s the lucky guy? Or is it a gal?”
Adrien leans over Marinette’s shoulder, the girl's blush is still strong and when she tells Adrien she doesn’t know Lila catches how put off the reply makes him.
She tries to remember the context of the letter she found, worried now that her assumption was incorrect, that Marinette hadn’t written the letter but that Adrien did .
The white envelope in her hand seems more dangerous to her than to Marinette now.
Looking for a way to get around giving Adrien the letter she walks away from the group quick enough to throw it away and get back to her spot. She listens to Alya and Nino hash out plans for the confessioners battle.
Even then she looks at Adrien who’s talking to Felix and Marinette, the flowers in her hands still.
A seething jealousy grows in her stomach and mind.
———————
Heading to lunch wasn’t any different either, she kept her eye on Adrien and when she saw the boy sneak off to the classroom Lila excused herself to the bathroom.
Quietly walking by she looks through the window to see Adrien place a grey envelope on Marinette’s desk before walking back out the door Lila hides in the closet closest to her.
Peaking back outside she slowly walks in the class, walking to Marinette’s desk she grabs the envelope, opening it and taking the letter out to read.
“ My second confession is I never knew when I fell for you.
It was something that just hit me one day, and that I’m reminded of in small moments again and again.
The friendship that grew between us was comfortable and open, it was free and grounding in a way I often don’t get in life, let alone people.
I don’t know when I fell for you but I’m reminded again and again about why I did, the moments and reasons.
I enjoyed the night talks and the study sessions we had together, they were short moments that grew our friendship stronger.
I enjoyed the moments where you trusted me enough to sit next to me and rest, to snort or wrinkle your nose when trying not to laugh.
I enjoy that you deem me close enough to know that you could argue against me about many things and know I’d never hold a grudge for it, that you’d never hold a grudge for it.
I adored the moments when we’d sit and talk about anything and absolutely everything there is, from your serious questions that leave me and you feeling like philosophers and nights where I ask every intrusive thought that pops in my head until we’re both trying to explain our ‘logical’ reasoning while laughing in tears.
I’d never trade the moments that reminded me why I love you because that’d mean never being able to see your love to your family and friends.
It would mean I wouldn’t be able to see you sketch something that inspired you, create with your own hands until you deem it worthy.
It would mean I wouldn’t be able to appreciate and witness your kindness, the one that always makes me worry because you are so kind that you put that above your own needs.
It would mean I wouldn’t be able to hold you close when I finally get it through to you that you are important.
I wouldn’t be able to see the fire in your eyes when you know you’re going to beat me in an argument, to finally have something to tease me with.
So while I may never know when I fell for you I will always be reminded of why I did everytime you be yourself in ways I don’t think you even notice. In some ways I hope to see you stay or change in, for better or worse.”
Lila stared at the letter.
Adrien had written the letter, the second piece of the confession and Lila’s jealousy only bloomed more, ripping the letter to pieces she threw it into the garbage can, walking back to Alya who’s showing Adrien something on her phone.
“Hey look Felix took Marinette to that cafe he was talking about last week, she says it’s good and that we should go sometime.”
Showing a selfie with Marinette and Felix, Lila tries not to sneer at the photo, glad that at least Adrien could feel some jealousy towards his cousin.
Then it clicked.
Smiling, she leans towards Alya.
“Felix and Marinette have been getting close haven’t they?”
Alya’s smile didn’t change and she simply shrugged at the question.
“Maybe, as long as I stay best friend number one he can have Nino’s third place spot.”
Nino clutches his hand to his heart, a pained look crossing his face.
“My place was taken by another blonde!”
Lila tries to bring the conversation to what she needs it to be but the chance never comes up again, she sleeps that day annoyed, jealous and tired.
——————
Wednesday.
Lila had to remind herself it was only Wednesday when she walked into class and saw Chloe yelling at Kim to give Marinette the box he was holding in the air above everyone else.
Seeing the box Lila feels the pit in her stomach growl in anger when she sees the same shade of grey on the ribbon wrapped around the clean white box.
“Lê Chiến! Give it to her now! I have two boxes worthy of being a messenger on the line here!”
Kim only laughs harder and Lila tries to keep calm as more people trickle in and get dragged into the commotion.
Kim finally seemed to get bored, gently placing the box in front of Marinette, the whole class now watching.
Slowly she unties the ribbon, commenting on the soft silk before opening the box.
Lila can see her eyes widen at what’s inside and she had to count in her head backwards when she did show the class what was inside.
A jacket.
A white bomber jacket with colored ribbons all along the arms side before ending on a neat bow in the end. Black designs on the cuffs, swirls and waves.
After that she takes two different sized boxes. One was filled with chocolates, many had a cherry filling inside of them, apparently Marinette’s favorite.
The second box was filled with jewelry.
Rings and necklaces, on the side of the box tucked in a silky grey bag were two pairs of gloves, one that seemed to reach her wrist while another seemed to reach her elbow.
The class awed at the gifts, Alix asking for one of the chocolates herself.
Lila could only stare at Adrien who watched Marinette the whole time.
—————————
Lila then noticed a pattern, Monday was the day she grabbed the first letter off Marinette’s desk. Tuesday was the day a large bouquet was left, including the second letter. Wednesday was the multiple small presents and now a third letter. This one is different from the last two.
The envelope she holds in her hands now is white, a cream white with a grey wax stamp sealing it, the seal also holds a blue petal. Looking around the classroom she quickly tears it open to read.
“I savor all our moments and that you have me savor some of the smaller things I didn’t notice before.
While writing this I can only think of the few that truly changed, my bettering relationship with my cousin, my view on that darn book you got me to read.
There aren’t enough that come to mind but if I’m given time I’ll give you a longer list of memories and moments. Much longer than a book or any fanfiction you have stored in your phone that you would ‘never read’
It’ll be more than that and I hope that I can keep that list growing.
That is my last confession.”
Another heartfelt confession.
She crushed the paper in her hand and when she turned around she ripped them into smaller pieces until she reached the garbage can, all the little pieces of paper falling into the trash can.
Turning to leave her eyes snap to the window where she sees blonde hair and green eyes and heart freezes for one moment.
Adrien
She stills, he’s looking down at the garbage can behind her and before she can run out the door to drag her claws he’s running.
He’s running and when she reaches the lunch area she sees him run out the schools gates and Lila is still trying to catch up because as far as he is, she can still see him.
So she runs after him, runs behind him while he turns direction after direction, left, right, right, left, left.
She slows down when he sees him run into a small store, she slows down when she sees Adrien frantically looking around the store until he seems to find what he’s looking for.
Lila’s blood runs cold when she sees Marinette and Felix looking through a clothes rack not so far away.
She runs in before Adrien could step forward, she grabs his wrists and when his wide eyes turn to her she knows she won.
She won’t let Adrien confess to Marinette because that would be Marinette’s happiness, that would cause the ravenette’s win in the end and Lila would never allow that.
So she held onto Adrien’s wrists and dragged him out the store, him squirming to get out her grip by trying to pry her fingers off, her nails digging into his skin the more he tries.
“Don’t. If you ever confess to Marinette I will ruin her, I will ruin her life and I will drag her down to the pitts until not even the dogs would want her.”
Her voice is low, her nails are still digging into Adrien’s wrists and it annoys her, it makes her anger rise when Adrien seems to calm at the threat.
He didn’t believe her.
“If you think I’m joking I’m not, I will end her .”
Adrien seems calm still, his stride more confident and it’s only then that she notices that he’s now leading them back to school, far away from Marinette.
She remembers the letters' words.
“my bettering relationship with my cousin”
She remembers Marinette’s companion in the store and a devilish smile blooms on her face.
“Why even try…she seems attached to Felix anyways…”
Adrien stops in his tracks and Lila takes comfort in the fact that she still has leverage over the boy.
“You think so?”
“I know so, why would Marinette ever look at you like that when Felix is there, he’ll take her from you no matter how hard you try and Marinette? Marinette won’t notice you, she wouldn’t bat an eye at you because Felix is there, holding her heart in a way you never could. Should never want to, because pulsing it just breaks in the end?”
Adrien isn’t facing her but she feels him shaking underneath her claws and she takes comfort in the fact that she’s causing this boy pain. Jealousy. Hatred .
Adrien’s voice is quiet.
“Maybe, maybe you’re right…”
She smiles.
————————
Getting back to class after lunch is something different, Nino and Adrien sit next to each other and Adrien looks deep into thought. Nino keeps nudging him and casting him questioning looks and Alya seemed to catch on to her worried boyfriend's sentiments.
As the rest of the school day past by and the final school bell rang she turned to Alya and found her missing, turning to the back to find her and Marinette talking, Alya keeping Marinette in her seat. Adrien leaves with the rest of the class and when she finally reaches him she’s glad to see it’s only him and Felix.
Adrien nodds before turning to Lila and holding his arm out, Felix leaving somewhere in a hurry.
Somewhere Lila doesn’t care because she just won.
Adrien holds her arm in his, they slowly walk to the entrance of the school and it takes a moment for her to realize that multiple classmates still lingering around the court yard.
It takes a few more moments to reach othe bottom of the stairs for Adrien to start speaking.
“I was honestly terrified when I saw you ripping the pieces of the letter in the garbage can…”
Lila tried to let herself free of him but he holds her tighter, his own claws now wrapped around her own arm.
“It was a sentimental letter, one written with so much emotion and love. Every word written with adoration and care, they’ll be things I would never say out loud.”
Lila’s eyes looked around the courtyard, still seeing all her classmates lingering around, they’re all waiting for something and she sees Alya, Nino and Marinette walking down the stairs.
She turns to Adrien, he has a wide smile on his face as he watches them walk down the stairs, Lila eyes widen when Marinette finally reaches that last step Felix walks through the gate, different clothing then what he was wearing before, hands behind his back as he walks to Marinette and it’s in that moment Adrien leans in to her and whispers softly to her.
“But I do think Felix could say every word to her one day, after all they were his words.”
Before Lila can break free from Adrien’s grasp Felix is already in front of Marinette holding out a blue rose.
Alya is smiling wide, Nino beside her is trying to drag Alya away from the two, the lingering classmates now also smiling at the scene.
“Marinette.”
He hands her the blue rose and Marinette has a dark blush on her face already.
“Felix?”
Lila opens her mouth to yell but Adrien steps on her foot and yelps, turning to him and sees him put a finger to his lips, telling her to quiet down. His face is nothing but mischievous.
She turns back to the scene.
“Marinette…I” Felix clears his throat and his hands play with the cuffs of his jacket.
“I was wondering if you’d like to accompany me to London this weekend, I remembered you enjoyed this one musical, Hellscape? and there’s a show in London on Saturday.”
Quiet.
A chuckle as Marinette plays with flower in her hand and Lila thinks she’s going to watch the blonde be rejected only to see Marinette smile sweetly at him. In an accented voice Marinette’s voice is playful and happy.
“Well well Mr. Blake, are you asking me out on a date? It’s rather un-gentleman like to ask a lady in such a crowded room, no?”
Quiet before Felix is smiling brightly at her in return, a chuckle leaving his lips as he holds his hand out to her, confidence now oozing out of his stance when he speaks in a more accented voice.
“Well Ms. Chandlier, a man is always prepared to show the room what he loves, what is a few letters and gifts before such outward confessions?”
There’s a laugh between the both of them that Lila will never understand and when she sees Marinette take Felix’s hand she knows she’s lost, even when Adrien stands by her side she lost because Marinette is happy .
And that small pit of jealousy only grew and inhabited her mind when the room cheered at the twos embrace.
———————
Extra:
“I don’t get it, why did Marinette and Felix say it like that?”
Adrien was sitting on the couch in Nino’s home, Nino leaning on the couch next to him while Alya sat on the floor.
“It’s from the book they were both reading, the one with the musical adaptation that Felix took Marinette to watch.”
“Hellscape?”
“Yup, two of the characters were named Mr. Blake and Ms. Chandlier, the dude had a whole plan where he’d confess to her through letters and gifts, he left a letter each day confessing something, like how he loved her or something like that and other times flowers and presents. It’s what got Felix the idea to confess like that.”
Alya snorted from the floor, looking up to her boyfriend and raising an eyebrow.
“Nino didn’t know you were a fan of the book.”
Nino looks offended, raising one of his hands up and shooing her off.
“Hellscape is a literary masterpiece and should be treated as such because the characters were written amazingly and naturally, you can’t judge good tastes.”
Turning back to Adrien he lowers his hand and points at him continuing his explanation of the book.
“So the confession between the characters was Ms. Chandlier found out right before he confessed and Marinette quoted the book from that scene, Felix quoted what Blake said and I’ll honestly say it was perfect and that Alya better start taking notes.”
While Adrien snorts at the comment Alya raises a thumbs up from the floor.
“Already on it babes, ordering flowers now!”