Chapter Text
It was a rainy day. A very sad day for Loki. He worked as a manager at a clothing store. He was driving there because of how horrible the storm was but he didn’t mind walking. He was on his lunch break. He always went to a small café across the street from where he worked.
The rain had died down by then. So he just walked to the place. But when he stepped onto the sidewalk he heard something. Even through all the traffic he still heard what sounded like crying. Loki wanted to ignore it. Making excuses in his head about how he is busy and has to get back to work. He has bills to pay and all that. But deep down he had to do something about this. He followed the sound. He was lead deep into a alley way.
The sounds of cries only grew louder and louder as Loki walked. He finally stopped a trash bin. Behind it he saw a few boxes. But in one, Loki was certain that’s were the cries were coming from. Loki moved some of the boxes. Trying not to get himself dirty. When he did he was met with a crying baby. Soaked in rain and freezing to death. The only thing it had was a thin hospital blanket around its hips. Loki felt something switch in him. He went right to work the second he saw the crying newborn.
Loki picked the baby up carefully and brought it to his chest. Loki cradled the baby gently in his arms. The baby was freezing cold. Loki was worried that they might have gotten sick out there. Who knows how long they were out there. Who knows what happened.
All Loki cared about in that moment was the infant. Nothing else mattered. Not even work. Not even lunch. Loki stared down at the child. It looked as if it had only been born a few hours ago. But they had brown curly locks. Loki watched as the baby shifted a little. Seeming to relax and calm down in Lokis warm arms. Loki tucked the baby into his coat. Resting him on his chest. Loki felt warm. Even through the cold weather and a storm starting again, he felt warm and fuzzy.
Loki didn’t waste a second to run to his car. Holding the baby tightly to his chest. He called into work. Making up an excuse about how he threw up and was scared to get others sick.
After half an hour he made it to his apartment, where he ran to the elevators as quickly as he could. He finally got home. He wanted to cry. During the drive home he didn’t let go of the baby. Every stop he would look down at it. Loki felt like if he himself even birthed it. Which might sound weird to others but to Loki it was something he always wanted.
Many people thought that when he would dress feminine, that he was just doing it for attention. At least after he would go out some days presenting masculine. Loki was fine in his body. He didn’t mind having a flat chest and.. a dick. But sometimes he wished he could have what some woman had. Or even both. He didn’t really know. He just wished he could live his life much easier.
But right now he needed to keep the Baby warm. Loki inhaled deeply and sighed as he went to his room. He carefully placed the baby on his bed. He didn’t care if it pissed or shit. Right now all that mattered was them.
Which was odd for him considering the fact he hated children. Working at a high end clothing store changed him a bit to say the least. When he graduated high school he would still see some teens walking around with their kids. Loki hated seeing that. He saw kids as life wreckers. That they ruin everything. Little demons. Once he went to collage and studied more, he learned just how hard it was to be a parent. Sometimes he even just hated the sound of them crying. Just seeing their snot covered faces or how they would scream in restaurants when all Loki wanted was done peace and quiet. Loki hated kids. He absolutely despised them.
So why now did he just take in a completely random infant from a box in an alley way?
Loki had no idea. He just felt it was right. God Loki would laugh when a child fell. Not even hiding it. And now he is going to care for a child? In the back of Lokis mind he kept telling himself that he was just going to wash them up keep them warm and then take them to the police station or something. But deep down in his heart Loki wanted to keep it.
He sighed and looked down at the wiggling baby. He didn’t even know the gender of them. But something in Loki clicked again. Sure he hated kids but he thought about how it would be to raise one. His father didn’t really do a good job at raising him. His mother mostly raised him. And even that. His sister did. And his brother. Loki always heard stories about the youngest being spoiled. But it didn’t apply to him. He was beaten and scolded at every five minutes. The worse punishment being when his mother wasn’t him. His father got so angry at him for spilling juice that he made Loki walk around the field five times. It was raining that day. There was a huge storm. Loki had to walk barefoot. Worse if all was that there was a fence Odin hadn’t fixed. It had barbed wire. The wire had snapped after a tree fell. Loki didn’t know which was he was going while walking. The storm being to heavy for him to be able to see far. What ended up happening is that Loki stepped on the wires. He kept stepping in them for almost seven minutes. It was horrible. Loki almost got tetanus because of that and Frigga wanted to file for a divorce that night she got home from Thors game.
Loki still has a lot of scars from those times. He mostly hates the ones on his back. Three lines going across his lower back from when Odin whipped him. All because Loki wore lipgloss out to the gas station.
Loki was pulled out his thoughts when the baby started to grow restless. Loki sniffled and smiled a little. He started to grow warmer towards the child. But still. Loki wanted to make the right choice in raising the child. Loki swore to himself that if he ever had kids he would raise them how he wished he had been raised. One of the biggest parts was his gender and sexuality. So he promised himself to raise his kid gender neutral.
Loki unwrapped the baby from his coat and peaked down between its legs just to see what if was one the outside.
A girl..
Loki held her and smiled. Loki would have to learn a lot now. Again. He did want to raise his baby.. a baby- child. Loki wanted to raise a kid gender neutral but he didn’t know how to start yet. Gosh he barely got the baby an hour ago.
Loki went along and have the baby a bath with some warm water. Drying them up in a warm towel and holding them in his arms. Loki checked his phone and sighed before texting Thor.
“Hey”
“What’s up little bro?”
“Can I ask you a favor?”
“Sure anything!!”
Loki inhaled deeply and sighed all the way out.
“Can you get me some diapers and maybe some baby formula and bottles?”
“Why?”
“May or may not have just became a parent. I cant leave the house and I just need you to get me those things for now”
“What’s their name?”
Loki stopped and looked down at the baby. He hadn’t named her yet. He didn’t even know what to name her yet. He hadn’t even thought about it yet.
“Parker”
“Aww cute name. Anyways I’ll be there in an hour”
“Thanks :)”
Loki threw his phone on the bed and flopped down carefully.
“I guess your name is Parker now” he said while caressing her cheek. It sounded like a sweet name. Meant for both boys and girls. It was perfect. For now. Loki cuddled Parker a bit more. It felt so natural. So pure. Loki wanted to cry so badly. And he did after a few minutes. Holding the baby close to his chest and weeping quietly to now bug Parker who was sleeping. Loki ended up taking a nap as well. Waking up to a knock at his door. He got up carefully and went to go answer it. There Thor stood with bags full of things in each arm. Loki helped him bring the stuff in. But Thor stopped him and told him there’s more. While Thor went to get the things Loki watch videos on how to make a bottle for a baby. It seemed like it was almost time for dinner for Parker anyways. As when Loki walked into his room, Parker started to cry. Loki smiled softly and quickly went to her side. Picking her up and carefully feeding her while he hummed. It felt so nice to just be there. Holding a newborn and feeding them. So gentle and small. This baby depended on Loki. It made him feel like he had a purpose. After so many years, maybe this is what he needed. Maybe this is what he needs.
Thor ended up bringing clothes, diapers, bottles, pacifiers, socks, little gloves, a stroller, a crib, a car seat, formula, and even some blankets and plushies. Loki knew he wasn’t pregnant but he felt like crying. But again didn’t show it. Especially not in front of Thor. Loki thanked him again and again. Trying to give Thor at least 100 bucks but Thor insisted on that Loki needed it more than him. Thor just went to drop the things off. He would be there the next day to help with the crib.
Loki changed Parker into some new clothes that fit a little or big. Maybe they were premature. Even the seven months old clothes fit to big. Loki felt his heart just fill when seeing Parker lay there with a pacifier in her mouth. Peacefully sleeping and resting. Loki knew it would be a rough night. But he is willing to have every night like that rather than Parker having been in a more dangerous situation. Loki was grateful he passed there. That he didn’t ignore the cries. He knew he had just changed his life now forever. But it might be for the best.
Loki didn’t sleep that night. He was trying to plan what to do next. What actions he had to take. What he had to do. First he wanted to know what happened to Parker. What made that cruel person leave her out in a cold box. It worried Loki really. How someone could just leave out a helpless baby like that. That person could have gave it to someone or gave them to the fire department or even lied saying they found it themselves and just gave it to the police station. But no. They left Parker out in the rain. Loki knew they wanted her to die. They knew that it would kill her. Loki felt sick to his stomach. He knew that before this he couldn’t care. Maybe even goings as far to say that it’s the baby’s fault and it deserved it. But now it made Loki want to throw up. He glanced over at Parker. She was sleeping peacefully in a little nest of blankets that Loki had made. She looked so sweet. So pure and innocent. How could anyone have the heart to hurt such a small thing.
Loki smiled. He was thinking of all the things that would happen. How it would be when she took her first steps. Her first word. Her first time riding a bike. All those things Loki didn’t have too. Loki felt a strong feeling of protecting Parker. He wondered if all parents had that. He didn’t want to leave her side. Not even to go to the bathroom. He just wanted to stay with her. Forever. Yo raise her. Grow old and look back at this moment. It filled Lokis heart with something unfamiliar to him. But he liked it and wished to always feel like this. Just him and his baby.