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“Buck? Hey, you with me?”
Blinking through lashes gritty with cement dust, Buck lets his head roll to the side. “Eddie?” His throat is dry, and he chokes on the name, coughing up the dust that cakes in his mouth. “What happened?” He shifts, the movement sending spikes of pain that blooms into full agony in his shoulder and ribs.
There’s a soft shuffle and scrape of movement beside him, then Eddie is sitting in the rubble beside him.
“We were on overhaul, remember?”
It comes back in flashes, and Buck nods— mistake. His stomach rolls and he swallows against the sudden nausea. “The stairs,” he croaks when it settles.
He remembers the creak and groan of the staircase, remembers Eddie’s surprised shout and the sudden weightlessness of falling. After that things get a little fuzzy.
“Where are we?” Buck asks, looking around the small pocket of debris they’re in. Their flashlights illuminate the small space, casting a sickly yellow glow over their abandoned SCBA gear. Looking at the tanks, Buck wonders how long they’ve been trapped. Both air cylinders had had at least 45 minutes of oxygen in them upon entering the house.
“Basement, I think,” Eddie says, and Buck can feel the weight of his stare against the side of his face. “Bobby said the whole building came down on top of us.”
Turning to meet his gaze, Buck takes a moment to study Eddie. His eyes linger on the streaks of dirt across Eddie’s face and the dark blood that smears across his temple.
“You okay?” Buck asks, his hand rising to check Eddie for further injury.
“Buck—” Eddie catches his hand, lowering it to Buck’s side. “I’m fine, it’s just a graze. I’m more concerned about you right now.”
And Buck opens his mouth to assure Eddie he’s fine, but the breath catches when his ribs protest the sudden movement. It doesn’t go unnoticed by Eddie, and the crease between his brows deepens in concern.
He reaches for his radio, toggling it on. “Bobby, this is Eddie. Do you copy?”
There’s a crackle of static before Bobby’s voice fills the cramped space. “Go ahead Eddie. Any updates on Buck?”
“Yeah, he’s awake and coherent,” Eddie replies. “Any ETA on getting us out of here? We could use the fresh air.”
The silence stretches on and Buck just knows it’s not going to be good news.
“It’s going to be a while,” Bobby says finally. “The structure is too unstable, we don’t want to risk further collapse. We’ll have to take it apart, piece by piece, but in the meantime, we’re looking at getting some supplies down to you.”
Buck and Eddie exchange glances.
“Looks like we have some time to kill,” Buck jokes weakly, shifting to get more comfortable in his half reclined position against the wall. The movement leaves him gasping, every breath burning in his lungs. “Good thing ‘m an I Spy champion.”
Eddie’s lips twist down in a frown. “That’s not funny,” He says, putting the radio down before he reaches for Buck’s turnout jacket. “Okay, you know the drill. Where does it hurt?”
His hands are gentle as he helps Buck peel out of the jacket, pausing every time Buck’s face screws up in pain.
“Shoulder,” Buck bites out in a grunt when Eddie manoeuvres his arm out of the sleeve. “Ribs.” His shirt underneath his jacket is wet with sweat and his whole left side feels like one giant bruise. “I think I must’ve landed on them.”
Eddie nods. “Did you hit your head?”
“I don’t think so,” Buck says after thinking about it. “Shoulder and ribs are definitely the worst.”
With another quick nod, Eddie trails his fingers up under Buck’s shirt to rest just below his ribs. The contact sends a shiver down his spine followed by a sharp spike of pain.
“Sorry,” Eddie says, his expression apologetic as he angles his flashlight for a better look while he feels around. “One, maybe two broken,” he says. “Any trouble breathing?”
Buck shakes his head. “Just painful.”
“I wouldn’t be surprised if more were cracked.” For the first time since Buck awoke, a smile tugs at Eddie’s lips— albeit disbelieving. “You can never do things by halves, can you?”
“I’m all or nothing,” Buck mumbles in agreement, letting his head tip back against the concrete wall behind him.
“You know you can half-ass some things,” Eddie says, his hands moving up to prod at Buck’s shoulder. “This is dislocated.” He sits back on his heels. “I’ll see if they can include anything for the pain when they send down the supplies.”
“Or,” Buck suggests hopefully. “You could fix it now.”
“What?” Eddie barks out a laugh. “You want me to reduce it here?”
“You know how to,” Buck argues. “And we both know that the longer it’s displaced, the longer it will take to heal, plus it’ll hurt less after.” Buck knows he’s won because Eddie sighs, pushing a hand through his dishevelled hair.
“Okay,” he says. “I’ll give it a shot.” Getting straight to it Eddie crouches beside Buck and helps him to sit upright. “Try and relax,” he instructs, one hand gripping Buck’s wrist while the other comes up to rest at his shoulder blade.
Buck takes as deep a breath as he can manage around his abused ribs, and shuts his eyes, willing his shoulders to relax. “Just do it.”
“On the count of three. One—”
“Fuck.” Buck feels the heavy clunk of the bone dropping into place, and then the dizzying rush of relief as the pain fizzles into a more bearable ache.
“Woah, easy,” Eddie cautions, helping Buck to sit back. “Better?”
“You have no idea.” Buck lets out the breath he’d been holding. With the sudden absence of pain, he can feel himself crashing and exhaustion drags at him now that one of his most pressing injuries has been addressed.
“Hey, eyes open,” Eddie orders, his hands coming to rest on either side of Buck’s face. “We’re not done yet.” One of his fingers taps insistently at his cheek until Buck opens his eyes.
“I don’t like being on this side of Firefighter Diaz,” Buck grumbles, tipping his head back to look up at Eddie.
“Well, maybe you should stop getting injured then, Firefighter Buckley,” Eddie shoots back. There’s no heat in his words as Eddie runs cautious fingers through Buck’s hair searching for bumps and bruises. Finding none, he shuffles across to resume his spot beside Buck and pick up the radio.
Eddie radios the team above them to fill them in and get another update on their rescue. Buck tunes it all out, letting Eddie’s calm voice wash over him, focusing on his breathing and getting just enough air without angering his ribs.
Eddie is a warm solid weight beside him. Steady and sure.
“I’ve missed this,” Buck says, throwing the words out into the dark. It’s been a long twelve months, with Maddie leaving, then Chim, then Eddie. And even now, with everyone home, back where they belong, things are different. Nothing’s the same as it was before.
There’s a soft huff of amusement from beside him. “You miss this?” Eddie gestures to the rubble around them.
“No, not—” Buck struggles to find the words. “I miss us. Working together, being partners.”
Eddie’s quiet beside him, then, “Things are different now, aren’t they.” It’s not a question, they both know it to be fact. “I left, and I know it felt like the right thing to do at the time—”
“It was,” Buck cuts in. “For Chris and for you.” It had been a dark few months, for both of them. There were times Buck wondered if the sun would ever break through the clouds again.
“I hurt you.”
“Chris comes first.” And Buck doesn’t hold any hard feelings over it, Chris is his first priority too.
“You’ve been avoiding me.”
“I—” Buck shuts his mouth with a snap before the truth comes tumbling out. He has been avoiding Eddie, but not for the reason he thinks. Buck has been working up to telling Eddie how he feels, but this isn’t the time or place, so he deflects. “I broke up with Taylor.”
“I know.”
Buck turns sharply to glance at Eddie.
“ Fuck.” The movement jostles his aching side and he gasps, his vision whiting out as he pitches to the side.
“Jesus, Buck .”
And then Eddie’s hands are on him, touching his shoulders, his face, his hair. And Buck just pants in short shallow breaths waiting for the dark spots dancing behind his eyelids to clear.
“Buck.” Eddie’s voice fades in and out, echoing off the narrow walls of their shelter.
“‘m okay.” Buck forces the words through gritted teeth.
“I don’t believe you.”
Hands tug at his shirt, pulling at the suspenders of his turnouts, smacking away Buck’s attempts to push them away.
“Stop it,” Eddie scolds, gripping Buck’s wrists to hold them still. “Let me see.”
“Eddie,” Buck pants, ignoring the ache in his shoulder as he pulls at the grip on his hands. “Eds, ‘m—”
“Please.” And Buck can hear the strain in Eddie’s voice, the ragged edge to his words. “Your ribs. You could have punctured something, I need to check.”
Just like that, all the fight drains out of him. Buck has always had a hard time saying no to Eddie, and now, with Eddie’s eyes soft and pleading, he lets his hands drop.
“Thank you.” Eddie has two fingers against the pulse point in his wrist, his expression focused as he counts each racing beat.
Buck watches through half-lidded eyes. He can feel himself drifting, drained of all energy through the crack in his side.
“You know Chris was asking after you the other day,” Eddie says, jerking Buck back into alertness. “There’s this science competition at school, and apparently no one else is good enough for him.”
“Mm, he wants to build a robot,” Buck mumbles.
“You don’t know how to build a robot,” Eddie says, his head shaking in amusement. His hands continue to move confidently across Buck’s chest even as he keeps up the conversation.
“‘can Google,” Buck insists, his head nodding forward. God, he’s tired, and it would be so easy to just close his eyes and—
-
“—not going without him.”
“And I can’t get in there to work with you in my way.”
“Chim?” Blinking against the bright light that floods the cave of debris, Buck manages to crack an eye open. His voice is wrecked, cracking on that one word.
“Right here.” A dark shape blocks the light and Chim swims into focus. “Now, will you tell Eddie to get lost so I can do my job?”
There’s a pinch in the back of his hands and everything after that is fuzzy and disjointed. Buck doesn’t remember leaving the mangled remains of the house, but he does remember the golden afternoon glow painting Eddie’s worried face with pinks and yellows before the doors of the ambulance were shut.
He remembers Eddie’s fingers, warm and gentle and not letting go. It’s there, feeling safe in Eddie’s grip, Buck finally lets the good drugs take hold, sinking into the depths of sleep.
-
His first truly lucid moment comes much later.
Buck shifts, testing the give of his ribs. There’s an ache that saps all his energy, as well as a heaviness that suggests he’s on some pretty heavy duty painkillers. He relaxes back into the pull of sleep, letting the noises of the hospital wash over him.
A soft rustle captures his attention, then, “hey.”
Buck rolls his head on the pillow, turning to face his visitor. “Hey.” It takes two attempts, his voice cracking on the consonants. “What time is it?”
“Late.” Eddie sits up, reaching for the lamp beside the bed. “Almost midnight.”
“Uh—” Buck’s brain stumbles over the maths. The station alarm had called them to the house fire just after 10AM. “You’re still here? You should go,” he insists, tugging his hand from Eddie’s grip and immediately missing the warmth. “You should go home. Chris—”
“—told me I’m not allowed to leave you alone while you’re here.”
“Oh.”
Eddie leans forward, propping an elbow on the bed railing. “And then he said you should stay with us until you’re feeling better.”
“That’s— you don’t have to—” Buck stumbles over the words. “I don’t want to be a burden.”
“You’re not,” Eddie says, quick to jump in, and Buck bites his tongue. He wants to tell Eddie he’s wrong, that he knows he’s too needy, but he just doesn’t have the energy to argue right now.
Eddie must see it on his face, because he sighs, scrubbing his hand down his face.
“I know you’ve been avoiding me,” he says, his tone leaving no room for argument. “And I suspect that with everything that happened with Maddie, with me, you kept a lot of things to yourself. Like, your breakup with Taylor.”
“It wasn’t a big deal,” Buck tries to explain. “Not compared to what you were going through.”
“Just because your problems were different to mine, it doesn’t make them any less significant.”
Buck pulls a face. “You sound like my therapist.”
“Which means I’m right.” There’s a smile tugging at Eddie’s lips like he knows he’s won. “I’m always going to want you around, you know that right? You and me and Chris, we’re family. You will always belong with us.”
“You’ll find someone else,” Buck says, shaking his head. “You’re not—” He cuts himself off. Not what? Attracted to men? In love with me? The words stick on Buck’s tongue.
“There is no one else,” Eddie insists. “Always you. Only you, Evan.” He reaches for Buck’s hand, squeezing it between his own.
“I—” Buck stares down at their clasped hands, trying to make sense of it. He’s not entirely convinced this is real. That his drug-addled brain isn’t making it up. There’s only one thing he knows for certain. “I love you.” He flushes as the words come tumbling out, lips loosened by the steady drip of medication through his IV.
With a soft laugh Eddie gives his hand another squeeze. “I know, and I love you too.”
“I really want to kiss you,” Buck confesses, shifting again on the bed. “But I uh— I don’t think I can sit up.”
With a grin Eddie stands to lean over the railing. The kiss he presses to Buck’s lips is all at once too much and not enough. It’s gentle, given the position Buck is in, and he wants nothing more than to grab Eddie by the collar and drag him down onto the bed with him. All too soon it’s over and Eddie pulls away.
Get some rest,” he says, his thumb smoothing across Buck’s temple. “Tomorrow I’m bringing you home.”
And Buck likes the sound of that.