Work Text:
Amity couldn’t have been more ready for this day to be over.
It was Friday, at long, long last
Her students had their faces buried in their computers, working on overdue assignments, which gave her a blissful bit of peace for her last class of the day. It had been a madhouse all week.
Club week had been going on since Monday and it had been a constant dash of students finding sponsors, recruiting members, running for club positions, and just general chaos now that the second semester was in full swing.
It was a nightmare for getting her students to turn anything in on time; or at all.
A problem her neighbor across the hall didn’t seem to have at all.
Luz had taken it all in stride, letting the teens running the club recruitments create posters and pamphlets, advertising them for assignments. She envied that. The much looser nature of art over English that allowed for such things. She had allowed a few to write about why their clubs were important to them. It still garnered less than desired results but it was something at least.
She glanced up from where she was grading one such essay, devoid of all punctuation or attempts at grammar by the looks of it. It was just another jab at her nearly dead soul. When the bell rang she all but wilted in relief.
“Chapter three vocab and questions are due tomorrow!” she called over the din as her students all but stampeded out of her room leaving naught but fluttering papers and a few clattering pencils in their wake.
She leaned back in her chair and sighed once the sound of their feet had gone entirely, leaving her in silence.
“Rough day?”
Her head rolled to the side, blinking tiredly to find Luz, leaning on the doorframe and peering back at her.
“Try week,” she grunted, sitting back up and popping her back.
“They’ve been nuts since this club stuff started,” Luz agreed, stepping inside at the silent invitation and plopping herself down at the desk in front of Amity’s.
“I’ll be glad when this high school ‘rush’ week is through,” Amity agreed, closing her laptop. If she had learned anything over the last three weeks of her acquaintance with her coworker, it was that she would not be getting any more work done now that Luz was here.
“Ay dios mio, rush week…,” Luz groaned. “That was the worst time I had in college…”
“You didn’t like binge drinking till you threw up or going on scavenger hunts for condoms and other assorted dumb things?” Amity asked with a grin as Luz's face screwed up in obvious distaste.
“I never had to do any of that, but I also got blackballed pretty early on in my freshmen year.”
“That’s terrible… why?” Amity asked and Luz shrugged.
“I was ‘weird and creepy.” She finger quoted. “You show off one human skull…,” she trailed off. She must have noticed the way Amity’s face fell, because she quickly jumped to explain. “It was a donation from the biology department to use as an art reference that my professor retired and let me have!”
“You wanted a human skull?” Amity leveled her with a partly curious, partly concerned look.
“It’s a great life drawing reference!” She defended. “My class calls him Vincent…”
“Vincent…,” Amity drawled and Luz grinned almost manically at her.
“Vincent Van Bone.”
“Get out.” She pointed at the open door.
Luz laughed as she climbed out of the desk.
“Aw, come on, you’re an English teacher, you don’t like a good pun?” She grinned at Amity as she moved toward the door.
“Put it in an essay and then we’ll talk.” She smirked. “As it is, this lunacy doesn't stop until next Wednesday and it’s plenty.” She swiveled around in her chair and stood, stretching.” I can’t wait for this stuff to be over,” she grumbled.
“It’s not so bad. I’ve gotten some really cool posters out of my students.”
“You’re lucky, I just graded an essay that had no brain power put into it whatsoever…”
“Tough,” Luz grimaced as she strolled over to the door. Amity resisted the urge to stick her tongue out at her.
“Ms.Noceda!”
Braxus came barreling into the room, nearly plowing into the teacher whose name he was shouting.
“Whoa, whoa, what’s up, Braxus, shouldn’t you be getting out of here?” Luz asked, her face laced with concern. Amity quickly joined them.
“I am, but I had to come find you first. I’ve been helping set up club stuff for the GSA.”
“Oh, sweet!” Luz beamed and he nodded.
“We got so many members that we need two sponsors, would you be one?” He asked and Luz blinked.
“Me?” She pointed at herself and he nodded. “Why me?”
“Well, you’re an art teacher…,” he started and Luz pursed her lips, while Amity tried to cover her snort.
“For a club that’s big into debunking stereotypes…,” Luz started but Braxus cut her off.
“Well, you also have the thing…” He tapped his ID lanyard, making Luz look down at hers, where a little enamel flag pin in bi-pride colors was pinned to it. Amity also took notice of the little pin. She’d never looked too hard at the overly colorful lanyard before now.
“Well, you got me there…,” Luz admitted. “You only meet on Tuesdays after school, right?” she asked and he nodded. “Alright, I’ll do it.”
“Yes!” He pumped a fist and Luz grinned. She definitely enjoyed the fact her students seemed to actually like her. Especially enough to ask her to sponsor their clubs.
“What about you Ms. Blight?” Braxus turned his attention to her.
“Me?”
“Yeah, we have over thirty members, so Principal Clawthorne said we needed to have two sponsors, would you be the other?”
“I can’t.” Amity shook her hands, taking a step back from them. Luz just looked at her curiously while Braxus’ grin fell like a stone.
“Why not?”
“I just… can’t, I’m sorry, Braxus, and I really have to be going now, as do you.” Amity quickly turned her back on them, walking over to her desk and quickly collecting her things.
“We’ll talk Monday,” Luz smiled at him and patted his shoulder. He nodded before leaving the room. She glanced over at Amity, pulling on her coat and shouldering her bag.
“How come you can’t help me sponsor the GSA?” She cocked her head as Amity very obviously avoided looking at her.
“I… I just can’t, not that group…,” she mumbled the last part as she passed Luz, who narrowed her eyes at that.
“What is that supposed to mean?” she asked, bristling at the implication, and not noticing the way the other teacher flinched. Amity paused, meeting her gaze for barely a half-second before it skittered away.
“I just can’t and I have to go, close the door on your way out,” she said as she hurried out of the room. Luz listened to her heels click quickly across the tile floor till they disappeared altogether.
She wasn’t sure what to think as she stood there, staring at the open door where Amity had vanished.
Sure, they had gotten off to a bit of a rocky start at first and Amity could be a little uptight, she was an English teacher after all.
But homophobic was the last thing Luz had ever expected of her, of an educated woman her age. What else could explain the way she had said ‘that group’? Admittedly not with the disgust and derision that Luz was used to from people with those kinds of opinions but there was definitely something to it.
She left Amity’s room, closed the door behind her, and glanced at her watch. She had about an hour before she was supposed to meet Eda and Raine for drinks. She’d managed to avoid getting any paint on herself today so she waltzed across the room and gathered up her things before closing the door and hurrying out to the faculty parking lot. She glanced around but Amity’s car was long gone and Luz frowned.
She generally considered herself to be a pretty good judge of character so to be so wrong about Amity really bugged her.
She laid her bag in the back seat and checked her phone, finding a text from her mom reminding her about dinner Sunday night.
Dinner with her mom and Lilith… she couldn’t wait… even if Lilith was probably the best thing to happen to her mom since her dad had passed.
She sent back a quick message before tossing herself into the driver’s seat and pocketing her phone,
The drive over to the Magic Arrow pub was enough to make someone want to drink. The constant stopping and stopping of busy hour traffic downtown had a tendency to do that.
She pushed her way inside and after a quick scan, spotted Eda’s mane of gray hair from across the room, and as she moved closer, Eda spotted her.
“There’s my little apprentice!” She grinned, holding up a tall glass of who knew what. Raine sat beside her, shaking their head.
“Hey, Luz.” The music teacher smiled at her as she plopped herself in the open seat.
“Hey, guys, how was your week?”
“Hellish,” Eda grunted before tossing back what was left in her glass. Raine rolled their eyes at her.
“Didn’t have fun with club week?” Luz smirked at the two of them. Raine’s lips twitched upward at that while Eda scowled.
“Lilith denied the club she wanted to start,” They turned to Luz, who blinked.
“What club did you want to start?”
“An organization of innovative contemporary youths who work against the grain to achieve their goals through science!” The chemistry teacher laid a hand across her chest and solemnly recited.
“So, goofing off with explosives on the school’s dime?” Luz drawled and Raine chuckled. Eda scowled, folding her arms across her chest. “What about the music club?” She turned to Raine, who smiled.
“Excellent, I have a whole new crop of freshmen who are eager to learn and compete. We have quite a few too, so despite not getting to start her arson chemistry club, Eda’s going to help me sponsor it.”
“Yeah, yeah,” Eda grumbled and motioned to the nearest waitress. “Another scotch on the rocks and make it a double.” She rattled the ice around in the glass. “And a Shirley temple for my friend,” she motioned to Luz who stuck her tongue out.
“Tequila sunrise, please.” she corrected.
“Can I see your ID?” The waitress asked, making Eda snicker.
“Oh, to be baby-faced again,” she sighed wistfully. “What about you, no art club?”
“No, the 3D art teacher already has one and a cosponsor so, there was nothing for me to do really. Oh! I did get asked to sponsor the GSA. So I’m going to do that if I can find another cosponsor…” She frowned to herself, remembering the look Amity had on her face right before she had left her classroom.
“Something wrong kid?”
Luz looked up to find Eda and Raine both looking concerned at her.
“Oh… just the GSA stuff…”
“I’m sure there is another teacher willing to help with a notable cause like the GSA. If my hands weren’t full with music, I would.” Raine reached over and patted her shoulder.
“Thanks but it’s not that… I was talking to Amity after the bell rang when a student came to ask me to be a sponsor. He asked Amity to and she said no. Not just no but that she couldn't for ‘ that group’ specifically…”
The waitress came and set their drinks down, Luz thanked her before stirring hers gently with the straw.
"I think I'm usually pretty good at reading characters and I really didn't expect that from her."
"Ya think she's one of them right-wing nut-jobs?" Eda cocked a brow as she took a sip of her drink.
"I never got that vibe but…"
"She's not," Raine spoke, interrupting whatever she was about to say.
"It kinda sounded that way…" Luz frowned.
"How can you be so sure?" Eda gave her spouse a long, searching look as Raine took a sip of their mojito.
"Amity was a student of mine for all her years in high school. A talented violin player that I gave personal tutelage to. She often spent her lunchtime with me," they explained.
"And what, she said 'no, I'm no homophobe'," Eda mimicked, pitching her voice ridiculously.
Raine made a face, and Eda's mouth snapped closed. Luz had come to understand from her time associating with the married couple that while Raine was pretty easygoing, they seemed to have a threshold and Eda knew when to quit.
"No," they said patiently. "She tried to start a GSA her senior year."
"Really?" Luz sat up straight at that and Raine nodded.
"Really. She asked me to be the sponsor for that year and I agreed."
"Well if the kid ran one before, why wouldn't she want to sponsor it now?" Eda leaned back in her chair and took a long sip of her drink.
"Well, she didn't." Raine frowned.
"What do you mean?" Luz leaned forward, enthralled with this new information.
"She came to me a couple of days after and told me that she had changed her mind and would never talk about it again. I tried to get her to talk to me, but I never could get anything of substance from her. It always felt like she was avoiding it, so I let it go." Raine shrugged.
"Weird," Eda hummed and Liz couldn't help but agree with the sentiment and it made her wonder. She liked Amity, wanted to be friends with the dry-humored English teacher, and certainly didn't want to think Ill of her like this.
She sipped her drink and pushed those thoughts to the back of her head for Monday, though they didn’t go far even so.
~ ~
Amity sighed to herself as she flopped back on her bed Sunday evening and covered her eyes with her arms.
She’d just wanted a relaxing weekend. Grade some papers, stay inside cozied up with a good book, avoiding her brother's new improv show. Was that really so much to ask?
She did get a lot of work done but the entire weekend, in the back of her mind had been that little voice. Nagging her about not agreeing to sponsor the GSA and the look Luz had been giving her.
That more than anything for some reason had cut her to the core.
The surprised outrage.
It hadn’t been till later after she had hurried out of her room in a silent panic that she realized what she had said must have sounded like to Luz and slapped herself on the forehead.
How was she supposed to face her Monday without looking like a tool or explaining everything that she really didn’t want to share, much less with someone she had known a handful of weeks?
She sighed, hoping to sink completely into the mattress and disappear entirely with any luck.
“Hey” A familiar muffled voice through the door made her roll her head to the side. “Can I come in?”
“Sure, Em,” she sighed.
Her sister’s familiar, green-dyed head popped in, looking concerned.
“Hey, you didn’t come down for dinner,” she said as she stepped inside with a plate in one hand.
“We’re not supposed to eat in our rooms,” she reminded, though there was no real bite in it and Emira smiled gently at her as she set the plate of chicken and rice on Amity’s nightstand.
“Well, what Ed doesn’t know won’t hurt him,” she winked conspiratorially but Amity only hummed. “What’s wrong, work stuff?” she sat gently on the side of the bed and Amity sighed. Propping herself up on her elbows to look at her sister.
“Kinda… they've been doing club stuff all week and a student asked me to sponsor their club and I said no…”
“Well, why not… besides the teenagers and after-hours thing?”
“It was the GSA…” Amity mumbled, eyes flickering away to stare at a blank space on the wall.
“Oh…” Emira frowned. “I see…”
“And now I think Luz is upset with me because she’s the other sponsor and I think I gave her the wrong impression about why I didn’t want to do it,” she sighed, twisting a stray thread from her blanket between her fingers.
“You didn’t explain?”
“I was so caught off guard and… I dunno, panicking a little, maybe that I just rushed out of there. Besides, it’s not something I like recounting to people I know really well, much fewer acquaintances like Luz.
“Isn’t this the art teacher you were all upset with when the semester started? What do you care what she thinks?” Em cocked a brow at that and Amity nodded.
“Yeah, but we talked it out. I was just mad about the room. She’s actually pretty funny and easy to talk to, we chat during passing period sometimes and have lunch together if we both happen to be in there at the same time,” she explained. “Work acquaintances and all that… besides that, I don't want anyone thinking I’m… a bigot or something. I am gay!” She threw up her arms and plopped back down on the mattress with an audible ‘poomf’
“Well, you could tell her that,” Em suggested and Amity frowned.
“That wouldn’t be weird at all… Just walk up to her on Monday morning. ‘Hey, Luz. I’m a lesbian, so don’t worry!’ Perfect, that doesn't sound like a poorly veiled come on…”
“Well… what does she look like?” Emira grinned.
Amity shot up, grabbing her pillow and smacking her sister with it.
“I’m just asking!” Emira laughed, jumping up and moving out of reach.
“She’s… fine, I guess! I don’t know, you’re missing the point!” she huffed and Em chuckled.
“Okay, okay, don’t get yourself all in a tizzy. If you don’t wanna explain anything then don’t. You don’t owe her any explanations. Just… say you had a bad experience with clubs in high school. It wouldn’t exactly be a lie…”
“Ugh, I’ll think about it,” she mumbled.
“Eat before it gets cold and don’t let Ed see you with that plate or we’ll have mice all spring…,” she grumbled before slipping out.
She had to think of something. Anytime she let her mind wander to those couple of minutes after Braxus had asked her to be a sponsor, she would remember that little bi pride pin and could only think about that look on Luz’s face and the tone of her voice.
‘What’s that supposed to mean?’
She winced just thinking about it. Not that she could blame Luz. She felt similarly when faced with people like that.
She sighed and glanced at the still steaming plate of food and sat up to eat.
A tomorrow problem.
~ ~
Whoever said ‘tomorrow never comes’ was a damn dirty liar and Amity would like to just talk with them for a moment.
She hadn’t even spoken to Luz yet today and the day was all but over but she couldn’t help but feel like that was intentional. She hadn’t even seen the art teacher today, though she had heard her voice out in the hall, directing some students. Luz usually stood outside her door, watching until the halls had cleared at lunchtime.
Amity, as of late, would go out there and keep vigil with her and make small talk but she stayed inside her room today.
She wasn’t hiding, she was just busy!
It had nothing at all to do with Luz or the fact that the normally open in the morning, art room door, from which Luz would usually poke her head and shout good morning, was closed and she felt snubbed.
Not at all…
She barely flinched when the bell rang and the kids jumped up and raced for the door with shouted goodbyes of ‘see ya tomorrow, Ms. Blight’ as they all but ran out.
She sighed and glanced out the door her last student had left open, allowing her to stare directly across the hall at Luz’s now open door and the woman herself, standing there, staring back at her.
Amity jerked up straight and hesitated a moment before giving a little wave, unsure what else to do with the strangely intense look leveled on her from across the hall.
Luz waved back and then…
‘She’s coming over!’
Amity jerked up, unsure what to do with herself now that Luz was standing in the open doorway.
“Hey, how was your weekend?”
“Oh, uh, fine… grading mostly,” Amity shrugged, playing with her pen. Why was she so fidgety?
“Ah, yeah…” Luz also seemed to be fidgeting but honestly, when wasn’t she? “Braxton was in my room at lunchtime, we’re getting stuff together for the GSA… hopefully. The other teachers he’s asked have said no and there are so many kids wanting to join that I can’t sponsor it by myself…,” Luz sighed, scratching the back of her head.
“Oh… I’m sorry… I hope it works out.” It sounded weak even to her own ears and she could tell by the way Luz’s mouth screwed up that she thought so too.
Luz stood there for a long, drawn-out second before stepping into the room and closing the door behind her.
“Do you have a problem with me?” she asked point-blank.
“What? No! Luz, I don’t have a problem with you…”
“So why won’t you help out with the GSA?”
“It’s not you, Luz, it’s just that group…”
“So you’re problem is with queer kids?” she cut her off, frowning.
“Of course it isn’t, I am gay!” She found herself snapping. She stopped, blinking and Luz blinked back at her, face had gone slack with surprise. Amity pressed a hand to her face, feeling her cheeks growing warm beneath her palm.
“Oh…” Luz mumbled and Amity sighed, peeking at her from between her fingers.
“It has nothing to do with the kids or the club itself or any of that. It’s just… I had a bad experience with the GSA in high school, that’s all…,” she muttered.
“The one you tried to start?” Luz couldn’t help but ask and flinched when amber eyes locked onto her.
“How do you know about that?” There was a definite edge to her voice and Luz swallowed.
“Well… I had drinks with Eda and Raine Friday night… they mentioned that you asked them to sponsor your GSA club when you were in school… but then changed your mind…” Luz shrugged and Amity sighed.
Of course Mx. Whispers would remember that…
“Yeah, tried being the operative word…” she mumbled under her breath, but in the quiet room, Luz caught it, if only barely.
“What happened?”
Amity tensed, crossing her arms unconsciously and staring down at her desk, her fingers digging into her biceps.
“You don’t have to tell me,” Luz backtracked at the deeply contemplative and hesitant look on her face.
“It’s… fine,” Amity finally sighed. “I tried to start one my senior year and Mx. Whispers agreed to be my sponsor but… recruiting went less well…”
Luz had a bad feeling about where this was going.
“High school is… high school and while that was only six years ago, a lot can change in that time, you know?”
Luz walked over and sat atop one of the student desks in front of Amity’s.
“Yeah…” She nodded.
“Went about as well as you think it would. I got a lot of shit for being an out lesbian… which I hadn’t been before I tried to start the GSA… A lot of my teammates on the rugby team gave me all these… looks and made snide comments… especially where the team locker room was concerned…” She pursed her lips, not looking up at Luz. “I ended up leaving the team in the spring of my senior year it got so bad,” she muttered.
Luz winced at that. She could only imagine. She’d kept a low profile out of fear of the exact thing Amity was describing and the look on her coworker's face stung her but more importantly, it made her angry.
“It was a disaster,” she finally looked up at Luz and was surprised by the livid look painted across her face.
“That’s terrible Amity and I’m sorry that happened to you. It shouldn’t have,” she said.
“It’s been a while, it’s just… Friday when I heard the words GSA I… panicked a little, I suppose… I had such a terrible time with it in high school…”
“Trauma,” Luz nodded and Amity frowned.
“I don’t think I’d call it trauma…”
“A terrible thing that happened to you years ago and still bothers you? You’re an English teacher, what’s the definition of trauma?” Luz asked, all business, not a hint of sarcasm or anything but seriousness in her voice.
Amity held her gaze for a long moment before sighing.
“Perhaps it was traumatic…,” she admitted.
“The things you described…,” Luz started. “That’s exactly why I kept a low profile in high school and why I want to sponsor the GSA now. So kids like me… like you, can have that support, no matter how small in the grand scheme of things. So they don’t have to lay low or get bullied! Yeah, sometimes people can suck but not everyone does and there's strength in solidarity and fellowship. We have to stick together!” Luz had her fists clenched in front of her, getting lost in her speech. She stopped and blinked, realizing that Amity was staring at her with wide eyes. “Ah, ha, yeah, anyway… I’m sorry about what happened to you but, isn’t that exactly why you should do it? So they can be themselves now like we couldn’t?” Luz cocked her head, a hopeful smile on her face.
Amity felt one tugging at the corners of her lips as well.
“You may not control all the events that happen to you, but you can decide not to be reduced by them…,” Amity mumbled to herself and Luz cocked her head curiously. She shook her head. “A quote I took up in college that I was just reminded of…”
“Okay… so…?” she drawled hopefully and Amity couldn’t help the smirk that quirked her lips.
“Fine, I’ll sponsor the GSA with you,” she said.
“Yes!” Luz pumped a fist, hopping off the desk with a grin. “This will be so much fun. We’ll be the gayest club in school!” She wagged her eyebrows stupidly and Amity snorted. “Braxus is waiting in my room, making posters, I’ll let him know.” She turned and bolted out of the room, leaving Amity alone.
Her thoughts, however, were no longer on the GSA.
But that maybe she had told her sister wrong.
Maybe Luz wasn’t ‘fine’.
Maybe she was actually quite…
…cute.