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“Please,” Alex said.
“I can’t,” LightHouse answered. “It’s out of my hands.”
“What do you mean it’s out of your hands? You’re the person making the series. You can do whatever the fuck you want.”
“Yeah, I know. But I left it up to a kickstarter.”
“You left my love life up to a fucking kickstarter?”
“What? I’m a greedy asshole, and I have a mortgage to pay.”
“You can still do whatever you want? You make a series about villains? Shouldn’t they be expecting a double cross?” Alex argued.
“I would never betray my fans like that. Fucking with them a little, absolutely. But lying about the kickstarter? Never.”
Alex groaned.
LightHouse pulled out their phone, about to make the next video.
“So you’re the reason that Morgan and I aren’t together yet?” Another Alex asked.
LightHouse sighed, “Not again. It’s not in my control anymore, I made a kickstarter.”
“You’re leaving my love life up to a fucking kickstarter?”
“You all have the same response.”
“Just make it canon anyway? There were so many times it felt like it was happening and then it just didn’t. What happened to all those?”
“Oh, you mean the non canon episodes? Yeah, you two do get together in a lot of those.”
“What?”
“People like seeing that content, but I prefer the will they won’t they dynamic.”
“You’re telling me we are together, but not in canon?”
“Yeah.”
“I could kill you right now.”
“Then it really would never be canon.”
“So out of curiosity, how far into the goal is your kickstarter?” Alex asked.
“Fuck, don’t do that. I know I made you able to but fucking knock or something.” LightHouse said, startled by Alex’s sudden appearance.
“Answer my question.”
“I don’t know, let me check.” LightHouse said.
Alex waited, glaring at them.
“Oh, you should calm down.”
Alex groaned. “Then promote it more.”
“I am tired.”
“You don’t look like you’re about to go to bed.”
“I’m not. I was actually about to film a new episode, but people actually started making these jokes about you breaking teh forth wall, why don’t you stay and you can promote it yourself.”
“Isn’t there something you should be doing right now?” Alex asked.
“I dunno, sleeping?” Lighthouse said tiredly.
“No. Promoting the kickstarter. You said you’d add another tier level today.”
“Can I do it tomorrow? I’m tired.”
“You’re not even trying to sleep. You’re just watching someone talk about glee. You’ve never even seen that show.”
I saw a couple episodes. And you don’t get to judge me, I made you.”
“You know it’s going to fail if you don’t promote it, right?”
“It’s gonna fail either way.”
“Look. I have a lot riding on this, okay.” Alex said, grabbing LightHouse by their shirt.
“Fine,” LightHouse sighed. “I’ll update the kickstarter. You know I don’t remember making you such a fucking nag.”
Alex stared over LightHouse’s shoulder the entire time.
“Are you done yet?”
“Yeah, I’m done. I added two tiers. A $100 tier and a $50 tier. For $100 you get the decoded postcards.”
“You have decoded postcards?” Alex jumped up.
LightHouse held out their hand, “$100.”
Alex sighed.
“And for $50 you get a map to the lost city of Atlanta.”
“Oh god, it’s never gonna be canon.”
“Morgan, help me make a clock app video.” Alex said.
Morgan looked up, “sure? Why?”
“I need to threaten someone.”
“Okay?” Morgan said, not any less confused. “Why on the clock app?”
“It feels right.”
“Did you just make a skit of me threatening you on the clock app with Morgan’s help?” Alex asked.
“Stop doing that! And yes.”
“Why?”
“It was funny,” LightHouse shrugged.
“LightHouse Raiders?” Alex asked.
LightHouse looked up, “Oh, another Alex. you’re only the fifth one to show up today.”
“I think you know why that’s happening.”
“I do.”
“Then fix it.”
“I can’t.”
“What do you mean you cant?”
“It’s not in my control anymore.”
“It’s your series. Fix it.”
“I left your love life up to a kickstarter. It’s still got two weeks. So who knows what will happen.”
“You did what?”
“I’ve explained this seventeen times already. Just go ask another you.”
“Just stop the kickstarter and make it canon.”
“I can’t, even if I wanted to. I made a deal.”
Alex stared at Vyr, tilting his head down at them. “How much longer is this going to take?”
“Please don’t kill me.”
Alex smiled at them.
“How much longer do you want it to take?” Vyr asked.
“Hi,” Ash stuttered.
“You know what I’m here for, stop messing around, and write.” Alex said, leaning over the fanfic writer.
“Yes, okay, yes. You look very nice today. Yes, sorry,” Ash stumbled, getting back to the story.
“How soon are Morgan and I getting together in it?”
“Soon, I promise.”
“I’m not giving you that cursed drink again.” Alex said, glaring at Space
“I can’t finish your story then.” Space said.
“It is an abomination in almost every sense of the word.”
“I’m sorry you’re wrong, but if I don’t get that drink, you and Morgan don’t get married.”
Alex glared back at Space again, “Say that again.”
“No, no I think it’s better if I don’t.”
“How’s it going?” Alex asked.
“Please, I don’t know how to write another kissing scene. I’ve already written so many.” Puny pleaded.
“And they’re all lovely. You can do it again.”
“I can’t.”
“Okay, but you will.” Alex sipped some tea.
Puny was hoping it was tea right now.
LightHouse scrolled through ao3. “This is suspicious.”
Another fic with a weird sentence at the end.
Almost like a code.
LightHouse stopped reading for a moment.
“Alex wouldn’t do that… yes they would. Okay. Fuck.”
They sat up and sighed. “How do I even fix this?”
They stayed silent for a moment then smiled, opening up the clock app. “Morgan.”
“You know, you can just tell me, you have someone locked up in your room.” Morgan said.
“What? Alex asked.
“Yeah, I know about them, I don’t really care, they’re not hurting anyone.”
Alex sighed in relief.
“What are they writing though?”
Alex snapped.
Vyr looked around their desk.
“Oh, What just happened?”
“I couldn’t help but notice that you made a lot of extra food today and took all of it back to your room.”
“I need you to stop asking questions.” Alex responded.
“Alex. Who’s in there?” Morgan asked.
“No one. Don’t worry about it.”
“Alex.”
“I’m not going to kill them.”
“Alex put them back.”
Ash was startled, finding themself in their own bed.
“I am choosing to believe that was a dream.”
“Alex, let him go.” Morgan said.
“Let who go?” Alex asked, looking away.
“The person you have in your room writing fanfiction all day.”
“You know about that?” Alex asked nervously.
“He keeps going on about some word count or whatever, send him home now.”
Alex snapped, rolling their eyes.
Space sat up in bed.
“I am finishing that chapter tonight still. Sending me home won’t stop me.”
“Alex, are you holding someone hostage right now?” Morgan asked.
“And if I am?” Alex asked.
“Are you planning to kill them?”
“No, I wouldn’t be keeping them here if that was the case.”
“Alright, who are we holding hostage?” Morgan asked standing up.
Alex froze, ”Oh no. no no, you don’t need to know.”
“We’re in this together, who is it? Some low level hero?”
Alex snapped.
Puny looked around.
“Thank god, I was getting tired of that same fucking album on repeat.”
A few days later there were no more coded fanfictions.
LightHouse could finally read in peace.
With several pissed off Alex’s glaring at them trying to get them to promote the kickstarter more.