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Reflection

Summary:

In which Ch'en is terminally stupid in the "emotions" department.

Notes:

Impromptu sequel to an impromptu sequel of bento_oreo's twitter comic about White Day (which also has a comic sequel). We are fast forwarding 11 months from the previous fic.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

2:09 P.M. \ Sunny

 

“Ah Ch’en! Do you have any plans yet tonight?” Swire’s high voice cut straight through Ch’en’s concentration. She scowled at her laptop screen and grit her teeth. This work wouldn’t get done on its own.

Without looking up, she snapped back, “Would it kill you to knock first?”

“You didn’t look that busy.”

“I don’t know what your vision of working is, but I have a lot to do today.” She leaned closer to her screen to emphasize her point. “And no, I don’t have any plans tonight.”

Swire didn’t reply for a long time, and Ch’en wondered if she’d left the room– but no, she would have heard the irritating click of her heels all the way back down the hall. Eventually, she looked up. The tigress stared over Ch’en’s head out her picture window, a peculiar look on her face. Ch’en snapped her fingers impatiently, and Swire’s green eyes focused on her.

“Did you need something, or were you just here to gossip? If that’s the case then kindly remove yourself from my office.”

She pouted. “Well I invited that stinking sewer rat to have dinner with us tonight but she said she already has plans. I asked Hoshiguma too and she said the same thing!”

“Us? I don’t recall being invited anywhere.” She turned back to her work.

Swire made a sound of annoyance. “That’s why I’m here. Do you want to go out or not? We could go to Sichuan. My treat.”

Ch’en’s head snapped back up. “Sichuan?” she asked in disbelief. “That’s a little above my pay grade.”

Swire rolled her eyes. “I just said I’d pay.”

“No thanks. I’m not in the mood for being pretentious. Maybe somewhere less formal.”

Tch. Why are you always like this? I don’t even know why I asked.” With that, Swire turned on her heel and stalked off, leaving Ch’en with a novel feeling that she had said something wrong.

Faintly, Ch’en heard Swire’s raised voice down the hall, and a minute later Hoshiguma stepped into the office.

“I brought you back some dumplings,” she greeted, lifting the plastic takeout bag.

“Thanks, but I’m not hungry right now.”

“That have anything to do with Missy?” She placed the bag on the table in the center of the room.

“Huh? What’s that supposed to mean?” she asked defensively.

“Well it was hard to miss her storming down the hallway just now, and you have that look on your face you always get with her. I reckon you two had a fight?”

Ch’en sighed inwardly, cursing the oni’s perceptiveness.“I don’t know that I’d call it a fight,” she said. “She asked me out to Sichuan and I told her I’d rather go somewhere less upscale. Then she got mad and stormed off.”

To her bewilderment, Hoshiguma started laughing. She doubled over, shoulders shaking, a rare sight for the normally composed oni.

“What’s so funny?” Ch’en demanded, heat rising in her cheeks.

“Sorry Miss Ch’en, it’s just…that’s not at all what Missy said when she went by me. I think you might have hurt her feelings.”

“Hurt her feelings, how?! I didn’t do anything!”

“Heh, you should probably go accept her proposal,” Hoshiguma said, trying unsuccessfully to conceal her smirk. “It’s not very nice to reject a lady on Valentine’s Day, you know.”

Ch’en gaped at her, realization dawning. Oh. Oh. She felt her face flush and she hurriedly buried it in a stack of paperwork. She burned from ears to tail tip as Hoshiguma started laughing again. “Get out of my office! I have work to do!” she sputtered, trying to control the sudden breathlessness that overcame her.

“Should I go extend your apologies while I’m banished?”

“No. I’ll… I’ll do it later.”

“Better not wait too long or I reckon Missy will find another date.”

“It’s not a date! She said she asked you and Lin Yühsia out too but you’re both busy.”

“Ah, did she say that? Well, I thought you and Missy should go out and have fun without old me. I have a date with my motorcycle tonight.” She grinned again, still fighting laughter.

“Hmph. How convenient.”



3:17 P.M. \ Clear 

 

An hour later, Ch’en finally sought the tigress out to apologize. She found her in her own office, on the phone with her back to the door. Her voice sounded cheerful, but  her fingers betrayed her stress in their constant twining of the phone cord.

She knocked lightly on the doorframe and watched the feline’s ear flick before she turned towards her. A shadow of annoyance passed her features when she recognized Ch’en, but she raised a finger at her nonetheless.

“Ah, if you’ll just excuse me one moment,” she said into the phone receiver before putting the line on hold. “What do you want?” she sniped, the shift in tone nearly comical.

“If you still want to go out tonight, I can wrap up work in an hour,” Ch’en said, trying to suppress irritation.

Swire scowled and put one hand on her hip. “I thought you didn’t want to be pretentious tonight.”

Ch’en scoffed in annoyance. “I just said I’ll go out, didn’t I? But fine, if this is how you want to be then forget it,” she shot back, anger rising. She turned on her heel to leave, but Swire called out to her.

“Wait!”

The urgency in her tone made Ch’en stop in her tracks. She turned back to see the tigress glaring at the floor.

“Can you be ready for a 6:30 reservation?”

Ch’en raised an eyebrow. “Is it already made?”

To her surprise, a slight flush crept across Swire’s face. Her scowl deepened. “Just answer the question, you stinking dragon!”

“Oh? Are you blushing?” she asked, leaning down to catch the feline’s eye.

“Ch’en!” she protested, jerking her head to the side.

Ch’en crossed her arms. “Hmph, fine. 6:30 sounds good. Meet in the lobby at six?”

“Y-yeah. Now get out of my office! I have work to do!”

“Huh, that’s weird, you didn’t look that busy,” she said sarcastically.

“Ch’en Hui-chieh, get out !”



7:02 P.M. \ Clear

 

Ch’en sipped her second glass of wine slowly. The warm lamp above the table illuminated the metallic embroidery on Swire’s dress, sending a kaleidoscope of golden reflections scattering across the crimson fabric. The constantly-shifting shimmer periodically captivated Ch’en, as it did now, until the tigress pulled her attention.

“Ch’en? Are you even listening to me?”

Ch’en blinked. “Uh, yeah. You were just saying the gala you went to last weekend was really stuffy and some guy was hitting on you all night.”

Swire rolled her eyes. “It was a woman, actually.”

“Oh. Uh, does that make it better?”

“No! It doesn’t make it anything, it was weird either way!”

Ch’en took another sip of wine. “Well, what did you do?”

“I told her I was married,” she said simply.

She snorted, but the idea of Swire being married struck her all at once as unpleasant.




8:47 P.M. \ Partly Cloudy

 

Upon arriving back at the dorms, rather than splitting at the third floor landing, Ch’en walked Swire to her apartment door, chatting about nothing of consequence. The conversation cut short as they approached Swire’s unit.

“Thanks for dinner,” Ch’en said. “I had fun. Oh, and Hoshiguma and I are getting dim sum tomorrow if you wanted to come.”

“I told that stinking rat Lin Yühsia to get lunch with me tomorrow. If she worms her way out of it then sure.”

“Haha, okay. Goodnight then Swire.” Ch’en turned back the way she’d come, but before she could take two steps Swire called out to her.

“Wait, Ah Ch’en!” She grabbed her by the wrist. Ch’en jerked back instinctively, and Swire let her go hastily. “I have something for you,” she announced. Her tail twitched, the motion drawing Ch’en’s eye.

“Huh? What is it?” she asked, nonplussed.

“Well, it’s Valentine’s Day, so… I got you some chocolate.” She held out a small plain box to Ch’en, who stepped forward to take it curiously. Their fingers brushed, and she looked down to notice for the first time a bandage wrapped around the feline’s index finger.

“What happened?” she asked, catching Swire’s hand with her fingers and lifting it up.

“Huh? N-nothing! It was an accident.” Swire tugged her hand away, tucking it close to her chest.

Ch’en frowned. “Okay. Do you want to share one of these?” She pulled gently on the delicate silk ribbon, opening the box to neat rows of chocolates, which she offered to Swire.

“Sure.” Swire bit off a corner and tasted it thoughtfully. After a moment she grinned. “Hmm, they came out pretty good.”

Ch’en cocked her head to the side. “What do you mean? Wait– Did you make these?!”

Swire flushed and turned her face away, stammering slightly, “Yeah I did, b-but it wasn’t hard!”

“So this cut on your finger has nothing to do with it?” Ch’en asked, taking her hand again. This time, Swire didn’t pull away.

“So what if it did! It’s not a big deal, it’s just a scratch–aah!” Her sentence punctuated with a slight squeak as Ch’en bowed her head and pressed a light kiss to her fingers. Still, she did not pull away. Ch’en stole a glance and found the tigress blushing furiously, gaze resolutely fixed somewhere over her shoulder. Her pulse quickened.

“Sorry,” she said softly. “And thank you. You didn’t have to go out of your way.”

Swire scoffed without heat, jerking her chin away. “ Tch . I did it because I wanted to. Besides, if that’s how you wanna thank me, my mouth is up here you stupid lizard.” She froze as the words came out, and Ch’en gaped at her slightly, feeling a deep flush creep across her own face.

After a long moment, she could only manage a soft “Oh.” Her blood rushed in her ears and she straightened up, trying to breathe. She had not envisioned this. Her tail tip flicked once, in hesitation, and then she was stepping into Swire’s space, cupping her cheek in one hand, studying her. The tigress met her gaze shyly, yet expectantly, and Ch’en realized with sudden certainty that she had been waiting for this for a very long time.

With a sigh, she closed the distance, lips brushing Swire’s lightly, then pressing gently. Swire leaned into her, her lips soft and warm and tasting of chocolate, and Ch’en felt her hands come up to caress her shoulders. She pressed further, deepening the kiss and leaning until the tigress was forced to step backwards, her shoulders pushed against the wall. She pulled Ch’en with her until their bodies pressed together, and Ch’en couldn’t stop a loan moan from slipping out of her throat. She reached for the feline’s waist, slipping her hand to the small of her back and pulling her closer. They sank into one another, breathless and wanting.

 

After what felt as an eternity, Swire pulled away and pressed their foreheads together, breathing heavily. “Y-you can stay over if you want,” she offered.

Ch’en cleared her throat and glanced away, willing her blood to stop burning in her veins. “Ah, I don’t think so,” she said softly.

“Huh? Why not?” she asked, disappointed.

Ch’en took a step back and cast her gaze down the empty hallway. “I…” She hesitated for a long moment, embarrassed. “It’s improper,” she mumbled eventually.

Swire made a noise of disbelief. “Ch’en, what? How long have we known each other?”

“That’s not it,” she dismissed, biting her lip. “It’s just, ah… I don’t…” she trailed off, searching for the right words. Swire stared at her, a shadow of hurt crossing her features. Ch’en reached up again and brushed her fingers along her jaw, slipping them into her hair and pressing a kiss to her forehead. “I don’t want to do anything too quickly, that’s all,” she murmured.

To her surprise, Swire pulled away and glared at her. “Ah Ch’en, you are so stupid!” she cried. “Don’t you remember White Day last year? You gave me those awful chocolates you’d left laying around for a year!”

“I bought you new ones!” Ch’en protested, bewildered by Swire’s sudden outburst.

“Exactly!” she exclaimed, throwing her hands up. “And now we’re here, a year later. ‘Too quickly’ my ass , you puk gaai lung, if anything you’ve gone too slowly!” She took a deep, shuddering breath and crossed her arms, jaw set.

Ch’en stared at her, lost for words. Oh, she had been so stupid . She thought back across the years as the signs started to fall in place. All the times she’d dragged them out to dinner, the gifts, her anger over the strangest slights, and the way she’d teased her last year on White Day when she’d tried to confess herself. She was truly, wretchedly, stupid. All this time she’d been reeling over her own feelings, and she…

“How long?” Ch’en asked softly.

“Years,” Swire breathed, her expression pained. “I don’t know. Maybe always.”

Ch’en’s chest tightened. “I’m sorry, Bea.” She stepped in close again, bringing both hands to caress her face, thumbs lightly brushing away the tears that had begun to fall. “I’m an idiot,” she mumbled, mostly to herself. Swire closed her eyes and leaned into her touch. After a moment, she let out a small laugh.

“What you should be sorry for is trying to leave after kissing me like that ,” she said, nudging Ch’en’s hands away to wipe her eyes.

“Sorry,” Ch’en said again, sheepishly. Swire offered no response, only tugged her in for another kiss, which Ch’en obliged willingly. After pulling away, she looked around. “We probably shouldn’t be out here. Last thing we need is another officer walking by.”

“That’s the only intelligent thing you’ve said tonight.”




5:37 A.M. \ Overcast

 

Ch’en woke up too hot. Without opening her eyes she tried to adjust, only to find herself unable to move, pinned by a heavy weight on her shoulder and hips. She opened her eyes blearily, taking in the view of an unfamiliar bedside table littered with belongings that were not hers for a long moment before she remembered the previous night. She looked down and found a mane of blonde hair splayed across her chest. The tigress herself slept still, one leg thrown over Ch’en’s hips, face buried in her shoulder. Her breaths drew deeply and evenly. Ch’en watched her for a time, surprised by how much gentler she looked in her sleep. After a few long minutes, she gingerly extricated herself and rolled over, seeking a cooler side of the bed.

“Mm, don’t go,” Swire mumbled sleepily as Ch’en turned away.

“I’m too hot,” she protested gently.

“Don’t care,” came the muffled response as the feline draped an arm over her and pressed her face into Ch’en’s shoulder blades. She snuggled closer and hummed contentedly. Ch’en sighed in resignation and closed her eyes again; within minutes she drifted back off.

She had not slept so well in years.

Notes:

i am very tired and i miss my wife who is currently abroad so sorry if this is a bit ooc/mushy :( it was really just an excuse to specifically write the line "my mouth is up here" because i have brain worms °w°

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