Work Text:
After the raid, the next time Dabi saw Hawks again was only days later.
He was taking a walk around the run-down mansion they were currently staying in when he saw Hawks out of the corner of his eye and instantly froze in his place.
( A flash of red. Golden hair catching the sunlight .)
He quickly turned around but nobody was by the window.
A lone bird took off from the windowsill.
He heard Hawks the next night when he was walking down a corridor to his room. As he walked past a wilted plant in a flowerpot, a familiar voice spoke up behind him.
( I always wanted to grow plants, but I can hardly look after myself, so I never really tried .)
A light chuckle followed, echoing around him.
Dabi wildly wheeled around.
His muscles tensed as his eyes darted around, but to his uneasiness, it was only him, a dark hallway and the echo of a distant memory coming to the front of his mind.
Hawks once told him he had always wanted to keep plants and flowers in his apartment.
( To make my place more lively, you know. Green is a nice color .)
Dabi, despite himself, could still remember how Hawks looked that day.
Everything else was hazy, vague like a distant memory, faded like a very old photograph. Somehow, Hawks' face was the only exception: his expression had been wistful, hair still damp from the shower.
( I'm an optimist. I hope I live long enough to learn how to grow and keep plants .)
Hawks had turned to him then, giving him a gentle smile, one that Dabi doubted he ever deserved to receive.
( It sounds silly, right? It's such a mundane thing, but even thinking about it gives me joy. )
His eyes had softened after that. Hawks looked at Dabi as if he wanted to say something, but in the end, he resorted to silence.
Dabi kicked at the pot, walking away as it fell and broke.
( I hate the rain. It's terrible for my feathers, you know. Makes it hard for me to fly .)
Dabi was a ghost of who he once was, who he was supposed to become, the what-ifs, the mistakes, and a roaring fire that refused to be put out.
They all haunted him, nestling deep in his bones and mind, clinging to him like shadows and refusing to loosen their tight grip on him.
It was no surprise that Hawks, in the end, turned out to be the same.
He had been stubborn and somehow found a way to make himself a nest deep in Dabi's chest, heedless of dabi's sharp edges cutting his soul or his demons curling around him, wrapping his fingers gently around whatever was left of Dabi's heart.
( Sometimes, I wonder what happened to you to make you so distant .)
Even now, even after tearing apart the remnants of his heart after sinking his fingers into them, Hawks refused to leave him alone.
Dabi looked out the window, watching the rain and dark clouds.
( They say when it rains, someone is mourning. Do you believe in that ?)
Climbing up the side of Hawks' building to reach the top floor was a familiar act for him, one that had been engraved in his memory sooner than it should. He knew where to put his feet, where to grab by his hands to pull himself higher up the building.
He landed quietly on Hawks' balcony after a few minutes.
As always, the lights were off, but this time, while it may not matter, the reason differed.
Dabi hesitated for a moment, fingers hovering over the lock.
( Maybe I should give you the spare key, hot stuff. You have spent more time here than I ever did .)
Hawks never got to give him a key, so Dabi began to pick the lock with practiced ease, stepping inside the apartment after sliding the glass door open.
The atmosphere was heavy. Dabi stood by the balcony to let his eyes adjust to the dark.
His gaze fell on the silhouette of a couch in front of the TV. One that hadn't been there the first few times that he went to Hawks' apartment, but appeared there one day out of nowhere.
The style and material of it were different from the rest of the furniture. It was more comfortable, cozier. Hawks never specifically said he had bought it for Dabi, and he never let himself wonder.
( I saw this and thought it was pretty. But since it's the same color as your eyes, you can claim it as yours. )
Dabi didn't wait around for Hawks. He knew he would never come back anymore.
After he left, azure flames engulfed the whole apartment, leaving nothing but scattered ashes behind.
Only a few more hours were left.
Just a few more hours and Dabi could finally slow down after years and let death claim him after he set fire to everything and took anyone that stood in his path down with him to Hell.
He took a deep breath to brace himself, looking at his reflection in the mirror, taking in the long white coat he was wearing.
Dabi wasn't used to wearing white, but it was supposed to be his last day alive and he doubted anyone would bother to hold a proper funeral for him for the second time.
He owed himself that much, at least.
"White suits you. It seems to be your color if you ask me."
Dabi met Hawks' gaze in the mirror. Everything seemed to still.
He didn't turn around, didn't blink, didn't move a single muscle because he knew that if he did, Hawks would disappear.
Hawks gave him a sad smile. Dabi noticed the charred remains of his wings on his back. Most of his feathers were burnt to ashes.
"You don't have to worry about the rain anymore," Dabi said, ignoring Hawks' earlier comment. "Looks like you have no feathers left after all."
Hawks' smile grew, but it was still a broken one. Vaguely, Dabi thought that it didn't suit him. "A dead man has nothing to worry about anymore, Dabi."
Dabi gripped the table before him, knuckles going white as heat started to build up in his palms. Smoke started to rise from his skin.
Hawks didn't say anything as he held Dabi's gaze. The smoke started to fill the small room, surrounding Hawks.
"Then why the fuck are you here, Hawks?" Dabi hissed, flames breaking free and circling around him in the room, crawling towards Hawks. "Why don't you leave me alone?"
Hawks wasn't smiling anymore. The blue glow of Dabi's flames lit his face, coloring it in a cold light.
" I should ask you that, Dabi."
Dabi's flames grew hotter, but neither of them flinched. Neither could feel it after all.
" You 're the one who is still holding onto me. You 're the one who refuses to let me be."
Dabi inhaled sharply, his breath getting caught somewhere in his chest, exhaling shakily. Hawks' sad smile appeared again as blue flames started to consume him just like how they did a few weeks ago.
"Guess you were never good at letting go, were you, Touya?"