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Death was never the end in this world, but it didn’t make it any less scary. Whatever god reigned above them had given them each three chances at life and now here Tubbo sat with only one left. He might have been alive, but the pain hadn’t stopped. Blood dripped off him and onto the cobblestone under his hooves. His right arm trembled as Niki wrapped more gauze around it, trying her best to tend to the wounds. There hadn’t been time to tend to it before.
He could hear them arguing back and forth, every now and again throwing words his way to try and use him as a third party. It was hard to focus on anything other than the agony of the wounds on his body. He tried his best to speak up, to try and stop the fighting, but neither of them seemed pleased with his answers.
Was he mad at Technoblade for what he had done? Frankly, Tubbo had no idea. Not at this point at least. Perhaps later he would hold hatred in his heart towards Techno, but right now, his mind felt like an agitated bees nest. Wilbur had gone insane. Tommy was barely hanging on. Niki had been run out. Tubbo had been publicly executed.
They were a mess, and frankly, Tubbo didn’t see the point of it anymore. Blowing up Manberg wasn’t the answer, but neither was letting Schlatt continue on as he was. None of this was right and none of it made sense. All he wanted was to turn back time to when they were carefree, when they had hope. Now Wilbur wanted Tommy and Techno to fight in some pit. He was giggling about it, happily clearing away rocks to make room for them.
“Tubbo, what do you think of the pit~?” Wilbur asked, waiting for Tubbo to agree as normal. He saw him as a yes man. A man who pleased whoever pushed him around. Tubbo had trusted Wilbur. He had trusted his judgment in the revolution and had not only viewed him as his leader, but as his friend. He had agreed because Wilbur was a leader. Wilbur put the betterment of people first. He put their freedoms and rights first.
At least, he used to.
He had turned his back on everything he had built both physically and in teachings. He was too blind to see the good that was left in Manberg. The good that Tubbo had created. That drunken bastard hadn’t done anything good. The festival was all Tubbo. Tubbo had created the beauty in that place. He had begun saving it from Schlatt’s evil clutches through words, just as Wilbur had taught him to do, and now Wilbur hated him for it.
“Tubbo?” Wilbur asked again.
“Just stop talking,” Tubbo said with irritation. “For five minutes, can you all just stop yelling at each other?”
Wilbur was stunned at the reply and took a moment before he spoke.
“Tubbo, that sounded rather harsh,” Wilbur said.
“Well, I mean, he just died, Wilbur,” Tommy pointed out. “I’d be pretty pissed off too.”
“Shut up,” Tubbo snapped. “I am pissed, but not because of Techno or any of that! I’m upset that none of you can think of anyone else other than yourselves for a moment! Wilbur, you were ready to murder innocent people at a festival rather than just go after Schlatt himself. You’re more obsessed with your control on Manberg than anything else!”
“And Tommy, you keep trying to prove your some hot shot and you won’t listen to anyone once you get your mind stuck on something! I’m sitting here in front of you both bleeding and severely injured after being publicly executed and you’re using me as justification for your opinions! Do whatever the hell you want to Technoblade. I don’t care. I forgive him for what happened. I forgive people. I fight with my words. Not with violence.”
At this, Tubbo glared right at Wilbur. Not a word was said as the tension hung in the air. At least, not until Technoblade decided to break it.
“I mean people normally fight with violence. That’s how fighting works.”
Tubbo struggled to his feet, moving away from Niki. Droplets of blood ran down his cheek. Red speckled the stone as Tubbo struggled to get his balance amongst the agony.
“Fuck all of you,” Tubbo said. He turned and started heading back towards the lower area of Pogtopia. He heard Tommy and Niki call after him, but he didn’t care. He almost slipped on the stairs, but managed to catch himself. He wanted to leave this place, but he knew there was nowhere for him to go. His feet took him into the garden that he had helped create alongside Techno.
The potatoes were all lined up nicely in the dirt. They were unaware of what they were being used for. Unaware of the war going on above them. Tubbo fell to his knees in the dirt amongst the little potato plants. He ran his good hand over the leaves, feeling them between his fingers. Deep in this cavern, they had created life. Green little plants amongst cobblestone and torchlight. Beauty amongst the cold, unfeeling environment. Just like Tubbo amongst Schlatt’s Manberg.
Tubbo knew this little potato patch would become forgotten. Once Pogtopia was abandoned, they would be left behind. They would be forgotten. No longer useful to their cause. Oh how familiar that sounded. He wanted to nourish the citizens of Manberg. He wanted to bring them life and happiness. Not death. Not fear.
Why did it always come down to violence? Tubbo just wanted to lay down the sword and rest. He had thought the festival would be the first time that he could pretend to be a normal person who hadn’t seen the hells of war, but even that had been a lie. Was that land just cursed to always see bloodshed? They had forged a new nation with the ideals of hope and freedom, and now it only stood as a place of fear and dictatorship.
“Tubbo?” A voice asked behind him. Tubbo’s damaged ear twitched at the sound of Tommy growing closer. He did not turn to look at him.
“I know you’re angry,” Tubbo said. “I know you hate Techno for what he did. I can’t stop how you feel, Tommy. I just want this to stop.”
Tommy kneeled down next to him. “I know you do. We all do. I’m just, well frankly, Tubbo, I’m scared. I’m scared of Wilbur and I’m scared for the fate of L’Manberg. I mean, the man is ready to blow the whole damn place and he almost did! He said you had some key phrase to tell him-”
“I didn’t,” Tubbo said firmly. “He tried to put the fate of the people in my hands rather than his own. He told me what he was going to do, and I was so confused when he tried explaining it to me. I didn’t know what he meant as he tried to put it on me. I just thought he’d make the choice himself regardless of what I did. He just wanted to use me as an excuse!”
Tubbo ripped one of the leaves off the plant in front of him.
“I didn’t want this,” He said softly as tears began to run down his cheeks. “I didn’t want any of this. I wanted to solve our problem through words, just like Wilbur taught me. I wanted people to be at peace. We made L’Manberg to escape tyranny and to have peace and all we’ve had is just death and war and fighting.”
Tommy put an arm around him bringing him closer. Gently, he touched Tubbo's forehead comfortingly with his own.
“I don’t know what’s going to happen, Tubbo, but I know that we’re going to solve this mess. You and me together like always. We’ll get our homes back and we’ll make it better. That’s what we do. You and me to the end.”
“Not sure what good I can do,” Tubbo said. “Considering I got blown up.”
“You were our man on the inside, Tubbo!” Tommy said. “None of this would have happened if you hadn’t been spying on JSchlatt for us.”
“Yeah, I’d still have two lives,” Tubbo said. “If I just..if I just let it be. I mean, he won, didn’t he? He won fair and square at the election. Why are we trying so hard?”
“You sound like Wilbur,” Tommy said, wrinkling his nose at the thought. “You saw what it was like there. You want to keep a dictator in power? He could change all the laws so people can’t unelect him, Tubbo! This is how it has to be or else there will be no more L’Manberg.”
Tubbo looked back down at the little potato plant in front of him. He couldn’t stop the fighting no matter what he did. He couldn’t stop Schlatt. One little potato plant could hardly make a difference, but a whole farm could feed an army. A whole farm could feed a country. One little plant could bring life to a dying nation when united with others.
“We fix it,” Tubbo said. “Put it all back to how it was.”
“Yeah,” Tommy said, nodding. “Yeah, that’s what we’ll do.”
“We’ll get Wilbur help. I know we can fix this without anyone else dying.”
“Well, if anyone does die, it’s going to be Schlatt. You know that. I don’t think anyone wants to let him live. I know I certainly don’t.”
Tubbo knew that there was no point trying to argue with Tommy about it. Schlatt was a dictator and from the outside, he was nothing more than an evil man. Tubbo had seen more of the inside working as his right hand and he knew how Schlatt clung desperately to alcohol to stop the pain in his body. Tubbo knew how Schlatt put up a wall so people wouldn’t see him as weak and would respect him.
Tubbo was sure that Schlatt was honestly just a regular guy haunted by his past and by his current medical state who was now taking out his frustrations on those around him so he felt like he had some kind of control in his life. It wasn’t right, but it was sad to see. No one else would understand that. No one would understand how any of them could turn into someone like Schlatt given the right circumstances.
But now wasn’t the time to mourn the failing life of Schlatt. It was time to regroup and plan their next move. It was time to take back what was theirs and make things right again. Even if Tubbo was just one small person, together as Pogtopia, they could make a difference. Wilbur had been right during the revolution.
As long as they continued living and breathing.
As long as they never gave up.
L’Manberg would never die.