Chapter Text
Text messages between Sam Wilson and Wanda Maximoff
Sam
Today 7:25 PM
Wanda: Sam?
Sam: is this who I think it is?
Wanda: It's Wanda.
Sam: yeah, that's who I thought.
Sam: wanda, for fuck's sake.
Wanda: How do you always know when it's me?
Sam: probably because I spent two years where you were one of the only three people I talked to on a regular basis
Sam: don't know if you remember that - it seemed like you did, but I don't recall getting a text or a call saying "hey sam, I'm really not doing great" before you made westview look tame
Sam: bucky said that if you got in touch with me, he wants me to make sure you won't murder me if I say something you don't like, by the way.
Wanda: Of course I remember, and Sam, I would never hurt you.
Sam: that's not a way of saying you'd make death painless, right?
Wanda: No!
Wanda: I wouldn't hurt you or kill you, no matter how much I didn't like what you were saying.
Sam: I'm pretty sure I believe that, but since you seem to be okay with killing just about everyone else, you can understand his concern.
Wanda: I do understand it.
Wanda: But I wouldn't have hurt you even if you'd been in my way.
Sam: yeah? what would you have done?
Wanda: Probably locked you up somewhere safe and far away before you could try to tell me things I didn't want to hear.
Sam: great.
Wanda: But I wouldn't have hurt you.
Sam: that apply to anyone else, or do I just get a pass because I spent years having your back?
Sam: wanda, I want the fucking truth.
Wanda: I wouldn't have hurt your family or Bucky, either, because it would have made you sad.
Wanda: But no. I'm not sure there's anyone else. Not who could have been here, anyway.
Sam: wanda, for fuck's sake.
Sam: and why are you texting me now? the damage is kind of done, the best time to text me was before all of this happened
Sam: fuck, I saw you two weeks before all of this went down, why didn't you tell me then?
Wanda: You would have talked me out of it.
Sam: no fucking shit.
Sam: I'm generally against killing people. I'm especially against you killing a kid and half the people at kamar-taj. remember how they had our backs during that second battle?
Wanda: I tried to just make them unconscious. I don't think I killed half of them.
Sam: wanda, I saw what kind of damage you did. that's not you putting a whole lot of effort into being careful.
Wanda: Oh. You saw it?
Sam: yes, I saw it.
Sam: strange seemed to think that it was important for me to see what happened. it was part of his "I think she's gone, but if I'm wrong and she happens to contact you, please tell me" thing.
Wanda: Oh.
Wanda: I'm sorry.
Sam: why didn't you fucking tell me?
Sam: I fucking told you when I was having issues, and those issues didn't include anything as serious as "I'm considering killing a child to get what I want"
Wanda: I don't know why I didn't.
Wanda: And I was happy when I saw you. I wasn't lying or thinking about other things while we talked.
Sam: great, I'm glad to hear that you weren't thinking about killing a kid while I talked about being captain fucking america across the table from you
Sam: just seems a little discordant
Wanda: I don't fucking know, Sam.
Wanda: I was doing better. I really was.
Sam: until you weren't.
Wanda: Until I wasn't.
Wanda: I guess it's good that most people didn't know how often we talked and saw each other before this.
Sam: yes, that's my top concern right now
Sam: my fucking image
Sam: you know, if you don't change your mind and kill me because of what I'm saying after all, bucky might when he hears I went off at you. he says it's too dangerous.
Wanda: Why are you doing it, then?
Sam: I don't fucking know.
Sam: I guess because I really, really want to believe that it's not.
Wanda: It's not. Sam, I swear, I wouldn't hurt you.
Sam: what about if I started saying things that pissed you off?
Wanda: I guess I can't know for sure. I really, really don't think so, but I understand it if you don't believe me.
Wanda: Would you have killed me if you'd had been there?
Sam: I'm not sure you really get to ask the hard questions right now.
Wanda: That's fair.
Sam: but no. I don't think so.
Sam: but I'm also a hopeless optimist who really wanted to believe that this was all just a mistake right up until strange showed me what happened.
Wanda: I'm sorry I let you down.
Sam: no
Sam: no no no
Sam: don't try to give it that spin
Wanda: Well, I don't know what to say, Sam.
Wanda: I considered offering to try and bring everyone I hurt back, but I don't think they'd trust me, and I don't think I do, either.
Sam: solid call. you fucking around with death hasn't really worked out well for anyone.
Wanda: Are you going to tell Strange?
Sam: I don't fucking know, wanda.
Sam: I really, really should, and I don't know that I trust that people won't die if I don't.
Sam: why did you text me, anyway?
Wanda: I don't know.
Wanda: Why were you expecting me to, if they told you I was probably dead?
Sam: I don't know.
Wanda: Well, at least I didn't ghost you.
Wanda: And if you feel like you should tell Strange, you should. I knew you might.
Sam: I fucking hate this
Sam: you know that if I don't, I'm completely destroying any trust he and the sorcerer supreme have in me, forever.
Sam: and they'd be right to feel that way.
Wanda: Yes.
Wanda: Sam, I'm really not asking you not to.
Sam: congratulations, wanda
Sam: the headache you've given me is much worse than anything bucky has ever managed to do, and that man has given me so many fucking headaches
Wanda: I know. I'm sorry.
Wanda: If you want me to leave you alone, I will.
Sam: what I want is to wake up and discover that my friend didn't just decide that brainwashed bucky/natasha were aspirational stories, but I'm pretty sure that's not going to happen
Sam: I don't fucking know, wanda.
Sam: I don't want to turn my back on my friend, and I know why you're struggling. I really, really do.
Wanda: but also, I killed people
Sam: yeah.
Sam: but also, you killed people.
Sam: I don't know. let me talk to bucky and see what he says
Sam: I'm not doing anything behind his back
Wanda: I know. I would never expect you to.
Wanda: I'm sorry. I shouldn't have texted you.
Sam: no, you definitely should have
Sam: it might be one of the only good decisions you've made recently, but it was one
Wanda: I also chose to destroy the book, for what it's worth.
Wanda: All of them.
Sam: strange said that, and I still have no idea what it means. I thought it was just a book with powerful magic in it.
Wanda: It had all the worst and most dangerous spells in the multiverse. It's how I did a lot of what I did.
Sam: that's not a thing that should exist
Wanda: And it doesn't anymore. It doesn't anywhere. I destroyed all of them.
Wanda: I know it's not worth much, but I didn't realize the book was like that when I started studying it. I just knew that it could teach me about my power.
Wanda: I didn't know that it would corrupt everything it touched no matter how you tried to use it until it had already started to do it to me.
Sam: oh.
Wanda: I'm not trying to make excuses. I wasn't brainwashed like Natasha or Bucky, and I wasn't possessed. If there was still enough of me there that I don't think I would have hurt you, there should have been enough of me there to stop.
Wanda: I'm just saying that if I'd understood what the book was a little better before I opened it, I think I would have left it alone.
Sam: now I have an even bigger headache.
Wanda: I can understand that.
Sam: it's gone?
Wanda: It's gone.
Sam: see, this is why my answer is always no when people start asking whether I wish I had fucking serum or powers or whatever
Sam: half the time you're fucked up immediately, and the other half of the time it opens a door that might eventually fuck you up anyway
Sam: hard fucking pass
Wanda: You aren't wrong.
Sam: you aren't going to hurt anyone in the meantime, right?
Wanda: No.
Wanda: I swear, Sam. I'm not.
Sam: you know that you really lack credibility, right?
Wanda: Yes. But I won't.
Sam: okay, wanda.
Sam: please don't make me regret this.
Wanda: I won't. I promise.