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They knew it was far past the time they should be asleep, but despite that, the two had only just now found their way to bed. And even then, their conversation hadn't exactly faded out yet.
"Sorry I kept you up so late." Atsushi laughed, just the smallest hint of nervousness to his voice. The other only shook his head with a soft smile.
"You know I'd give a thousand sleepless nights to spend more time with you."
The kind words weren't anything new by this point, but they still caught Atsushi pleasantly off guard sometimes. He offered a contented hum in reply before shifting to wrap his arms around the man next to him.
"Cold?"
"Not really."
"Hm."
His hands trailed down to the skin beneath his shirt, with no intentions other than being close to him. Akutagawa sighed with another smile playing at his lips.
"Well, you certainly feel cold."
"Says you."
"Says your freezing hands."
They shared a quiet laugh, basking in the domestic feeling that surrounded them.
But a short lived silence was broken by a simple question.
"How did we get here?"
There wasn't any ill intent, or accusation, but the question hung heavy in the air nonetheless.
"I…couldn't say…" His words were spoken in nothing more than a whisper. "But I do recall you being the one who started it."
Atsushi hummed again "I was the one who said something, but you were the one to fall first."
"I was, wasn't I." He seemed to be lost in a fond memory "How could I not have?"
A lighthearted scoff. "You know how I'd answer that."
"That's why it was rhetorical, Jinko." He pressed a light kiss to his hair.
There was yet another pause, the two nearly asleep before the silence was broken once again.
"I love seeing you smile…" His words held nothing but sincerity as he continued "It makes me happy to be content like this with you."
Akutagawa responded by burying his face in the crook of his neck.
"I'm sorry." He couldn't stop the apology that slipped past his lips. In moments like these, he just couldn't help but be reminded of how things once were. "For everything, I'm so sorry."
"It's alright." Atsushi moved to comb his fingers through his hair in a soothing manner.
"It's not…"
"Then it will be." He continued to play with his hair "We have the time to make things alright."
Akutagawa let out a dry laugh, which didn't do much to stop the few tears in his eyes and the choked voice that spoke next. "What did I do to deserve this?" Atsushi only held him tighter, letting him cry silently.
"You're not unworthy of love, you know."
"Normally I'd tell you that." He looked up at Atsushi, who had a reassuring smile on his face.
"Yes…but you need to hear it sometimes too."
He sighed in content before taking a shaky breath in. "Thank you."
"Thank you." He kissed the top of his head. "For everything"