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Seungmin
Minho is watching anime in his room. Normally, Jisung would be watching with him, but he's on a date with his girlfriend. None of the members have met her yet; Jisung wants to keep his relationship private for now, and they all respect that. He had even bailed on 3Racha’s editing session earlier that evening--something he never did—so Seungmin wondered if they were getting serious.
Seungmin wanders out to the kitchen to grab a glass of water. Unlike in the other dorm, they actually have real, glass cups. He grabs one from the cabinet and opens the fridge to fetch the water filter. As he closes the fridge door, Minho’s door swings open. Minho usually grabs snacks after watching his first episode of the night.
It’s not Minho, though. It’s Jisung.
Seungmin looks at him curiously. Jisung shouldn’t be here right now.
He doesn’t have to say anything. Jisung realizes this too and rushes to explain. “We decided to cancel. She was really busy with university, so I didn’t want her to feel pressured.”
“Ah, well, enjoy your show,” Seungmin says casually.
Inwardly, he wonders why Jisung didn’t just go to 3Racha’s editing session—which is still happening, right now—if the date didn’t happen.
---
Jisung is over again. Seungmin can hear him giggling at some movie in Minho’s room. Their walls aren’t all that thick.
Seungmin feels like he remembers overhearing Jisung tell Hyunjin that he’ll be home late tonight since he’s going to a PC bang with his girlfriend. He doesn’t think he misheard.
Seungmin shoots Hyunjin a text. Hey, do you know where Jisung is?
Hyunjin replies almost instantly. Out with his girlfriend, why?
And Seungmin knows.
Changbin
Stray Kids has just bagged another music show win, and they have absolutely no schedules tomorrow. So, naturally, they do what any reasonable people would do and get drunk. They’re Koreans, after all.
Jeongin is giggling and hugging a decorative pillow (the only one in the dorm, purchased by Hyunjin of course) tightly. Felix is counting the lightbulbs and getting a different number each time. Every time he reaches nine or ten, he lapses into English and becomes confused.
Hyunjin and Minho are drunkenly singing sea shanties. Jisung has affixed himself to Minho’s leg, but Minho doesn’t seem to notice. Chan is drifting off to sleep, while Seungmin is glaring at Hyunjin and Minho.
Changbin is bored. “Hey, let’s play Never Have I Ever,” he suggests.
Seungmin makes a face. “That’s a game for middle schoolers.” Changbin gestures towards their members. Seungmin shrugs. “Touché.”
Felix seems to be the only other member paying attention. “Never have I ever,” he singsongs, “dropped my airpods into the Han River multiple times.”
Changbin takes a shot, which draws the attention of the rest of the members. He flushes a little bit as Hyunjin and Jisung start laughing at him. “I thought we weren’t going to tell anyone about that, Felix.”
“Oops,” Felix giggles, not sounding sorry at all. “Your turn, hyung.”
“Never have I ever,” Changbin says, “been kissed in the bathroom at Music Bank.”
He directs the next question at Minho, who obligingly takes a shot. Everyone remembers Minho emerging from the bathroom, lip tint on his cheeks. But he’s surprised when Jisung takes a shot too.
The other members immediately begin teasing Jisung and speculating on who he may have kissed. But Changbin is the most sober of the bunch, even as the latest shot is beginning to kick in.
He recalls that Jisung hadn’t been wearing anything on his lips that day. But now, it strikes him how strange that was. All the other members had on lip tint or gloss. The same stylist noona who had done Changbin’s makeup had done Jisung’s, he remembers pestering Jisung as he waited. Soojin noona was one of their regular makeup artists; she wouldn’t have forgotten to do Jisung’s lips.
And Changbin knows.
---
Felix
It’s been a long, hard day of dance practice. They’re working on the final move, which is perhaps the most technical yet. Jisung just can’t get it down. If it had been anyone else, Minho probably would have run out of patience by now. But it’s Jisung, and Minho has always had a soft spot for Jisung.
This time, Felix concentrates on keeping his arm perfectly straight to support Jisung as he leans back. He lowers Jisung closer to the ground, careful not to let his elbow lock up, and Jisung’s hands clamp down on his shoulders. Jisung smootly flips back over Felix’s head and lands steadily on his feet.
They both turn to Minho smiling, waiting for his approval.
He cracks a smile. “All right, that was good. Grab some water and we’ll run it one last time.”
The next time, things don’t go so smoothly. Jisung comes crashing down, kicking Felix in the neck and landing hard on his shoulder. Both of them crumple to the ground.
Minho comes rushing over. Felix can’t help but notice he goes to Jisung first, a look of panic on his face, before shifting over to Felix, his expression changing to concern. “Yongbok-ah, are you okay? Do you need ice?”
“Yeah, but I can get it.” Felix sits up. “I’m okay hyung, it’ll hurt tomorrow but right now I’m just startled.”
“Get some rest,” Minho instructs. “I’m going to either modify the move or swap you out for a different member. I don’t want you getting hurt again.”
His attention shifts back to Jisung, who he’s pulled into his lap. “Baby, are you okay to walk? Should I carry you?”
“Hyung, I’m fine,” Jisung laughs awkwardly. “I can get up.”
“I know you can but that doesn’t mean you should.” Minho easily hoists Jisung into his arms. Jisung’s ears are flaming red, but he looks so natural being held by Minho, like a bride being carried across the threshold. Except the pair can’t look each other in the eyes.
And Felix knows.
Chan
Jisung is working on a song. Usually, Jisung, Changbin, and Chan all collaborate, but sometimes one of them gets an idea into their head that turns into an entire song all by itself. Chan has been really impressed by Jisung’s songs in the past, so he’s happy to let Jisung work it out on his own.
Until Jisung comes to him, asking for advice on lyrics.
“I want to capture the feeling of wanting. Of having to hide your feelings but not wanting to decrease… I don’t know, their realness. Like you feel embarrassed that you have to love them in secret, because you want everyone to know.”
Chan spins around in his chair and raises his eyebrows as he thinks. “Hmm, I really like your concept. How did you think of it?”
“Erm, from an anime I watched recently.”
“Do you want to work off of some of the aspects of the anime?” Chan suggests. “Are there any themes or symbols you could work with?”
“That’s…that’s a good idea, hyung. I’ll start with that.”
---
Jisung still can’t seem to nail down his idea. He’s asked Changbin for help, too, and while he liked what Changbin came up with, he said that it didn’t quite fit what he was thinking of. Chan offered to watch the anime for him, but Jisung declined adamantly.
“It’s… it’s a really long anime, hyung. I appreciate the offer, but it would take you forever to watch. I’ll get it.”
Now, he and Minho are draped over each other on the couch, watching Howl’s Moving Castle again. Jisung exclaims in delight about something on the screen, and Minho throws a kernel of popcorn at him. Chan is sitting in the kitchen, trying to pay attention to the video he has up on his laptop, but the two of them aren’t making it easy.
Jisung yells in delight again, and Chan turns towards him in exasperation. The light streaming through the cracks in the curtains has created a little rainbow on Minho’s cheek, and Jisung is practically tripping over himself to get pictures. Chan can’t but help thinking that it’s somewhat cute.
The two of them settle back down to watch their movie, and Chan can finally concentrate on his video. He’s studying Japanese again, as he’s forgotten much of his katakana and there’s always more kanji to learn. After ten minutes or so, Jisung starts squealing again, and Chan finally retreats to his room in defeat. He doesn’t think that Jisung or Minho even realized he was ever there.
---
Jisung finally finishes the song. Chan is nodding his head in approval as he reads over the lyrics. They’re poetic and tragic and beautiful all at once. As he scans the second verse, two lines catch his attention.
Let’s watch the same old movie until the story is our own.
I’d trace rainbows on your cheeks, but they’re already painted on.
Chan reads the lines again before glancing back to the chorus.
If I could tell the strangers in the crowd that you were mine, I would.
I would tell my mom and all my friends if I could.
But if it broke our lives apart, would you still love me?
Would it be worth it if you never became all that you could be?
Oh darling, I’d never forgive myself if I stopped you here.
But if I could tell everyone you were mine, I would.
And Chan knows.
Hyunjin
Jisung never seems to be at the dorm these days. Hyunjin thinks he’s still dating that same girl, though he seems to mention her less and less, so maybe he’s out with her. And Jisung has been going to the gym a fair amount recently, so he could always be there.
Truth be told, as much as he loves Jisung, he doesn’t mind when Jisung isn’t there. Jisung is terrible at washing the dishes, so even though he gets takeout most of the time and only uses silverware, Hyunjin is constantly re-washing Jisung’s silverware. Most of the time it still has suds on it.
Also, Jisung is always making loud noises. Actually, he’s pretty quiet when he’s not with the rest of the group. But he’s clumsy, so he’s constantly knocking things over. Yesterday it was all of the bottles of hair products in the shower. This morning he had tripped over one of the stools in the kitchen, so all of the other stools (and him) clattered to the floor like dominos.
Tonight, it’s almost too quiet. Hyunjin looks at his phone—the weather is warm and dry even as the sun is setting. Perfect temperature for a walk along the Han River.
There’s nothing to trip over or break alongside the river. He texts Jisung: I’m going for a walk by the river, wanna come?
He works on organizing his paints until he hears the ding of Jisung’s response come in.
Sorry Hyunjin-ah, I’m working on a track in the studio.
Hyunjin decides to go anyway. The weather is too nice to waste the night inside. As he steps outside, the warm air pierced by a smooth, crisp breeze, he marvels at the sun sinking below the high-rises, outlining the buildings in gold. The river will be even more beautiful. He can already picture the last rays of sunshine reflecting off the water. Perfect material for a painting.
There’s a convenience store on his left as he walks towards the river. He idly glances through the window, then looks back when one of the figures sitting in front of the counter looks strikingly familiar.
Although the person’s face is obscured by a baseball cap and a mask, it’s clearly Jisung.
Why is Jisung at the convenience store when he said he was at the studio? Maybe he just stepped out for a snack. It doesn’t seem like Jisung—the Jisung that Hyunjin knows hates going out, preferring to order delivery—but it’s certainly possible.
Hyunjin thinks about walking in to say hi, but another person joins Jisung at the counter. Their face is turned, and they wear an oversized bucket hat, so Hyunjin can’t tell who it is.
As Hyunjin watches, the person wraps their arm around Jisung’s waist. Jisung scans his periphery before relaxing into the stranger’s shoulder. The stranger turns their head slightly to kiss Jisung’s forehead, and Hyunjin realizes immediately that it’s Minho.
Minho and Jisung share a cup of ramen—when does Jisung ever share ramen? —and Hyunjin knows.
I.N.
Jeongin loves Thursday nights. Thursday nights are the nights that Minho orders take-out, and Minho is always willing to drop a large sum of money on sushi.
Usually, it’s just Jeongin, Minho, and Jisung, who invites himself over for free sushi. The three of them hang out and rate different rolls from different sushi restaurants. It’s awesome.
Last week, the winner was the green dragon roll. Filled with crabmeat and topped with avocado, sriracha mayonnaise, and furikake, it was the perfect blend of savory, sweet, spicy, creamy… Jeongin’s mouth waters just thinking about it.
Usually, Minho and Jisung get distracted bickering over sometime or other. Last week, Jisung beat Minho with a pillow while screeching random stupid things like “Honey! Why didn’t you tell me there was seaweed in my teeth?” and “Baby, I need the last piece of tamago!”
This allowed Jeongin the opportunity to inhale two entire rolls of sushi while they were distracted.
Tonight, though, Jeongin is dismayed when Minho announces that takeout night is cancelled.
“I’m sorry, In-ah,” he says, slumping on the couch. “I’m just feeling a little drained from practice today.”
Jeongin knows that when Minho says “a little drained” he actually means “fucking exhausted.”
“You can still do takeout night without me, though,” Minho says, “I’ll even pay for it.”
Jeongin shakes his head furiously. “No hyung, it’s not takeout night without you. We’ll wait for next week.”
Minho smiles at him, his eyelids beginning to flutter closed. The door bangs open. It’s Jisung. Jeongin opens his mouth to tell him that takeout night isn’t happening, but Jisung’s gaze is focused on Minho.
“Baby, you need to stop pushing yourself so hard,” he scolds, lifting Minho’s head for a second so he can sit down. Minho puts his head back down in Jisung’s lap and smiles up at him.
“Honey, you came?”
“Stupid, obviously I came.” Jisung combs through Minho’s hair with his fingers. Both of them seem to forget that Jeongin is in the room as they look at each other.
Jeongin has never been good at reading the room. But he knows.
---
It’s during a broadcast when they realize that they all know.
Minho calls Jisung baby and Jisung flushes and smiles, just a little bit, but all of the members see it. Some of them smirk, some chuckle, but they all catch each other’s eyes at the same time.
Later, in a secret groupchat they’ve created, they ask Chan, should we tell them that we know?
Chan’s response: absolutely not. They’ll tell us at some point.
Until then, Changbin types, this will be fun.