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“I have matters to discuss with Her Excellency.”
The singular guard stationed in front of Tenshukaku faltered momentarily under the intense gaze of his general. Understandably so. If she looked in the mirror right now, she'd be taken aback by the unbending expression she wore on her face. It didn’t take a mind reader to know she was absolutely hellbent on her goal. Whatever goal it is that lies behind the doors of Tenshukaku— the Raiden Shogun's abode. The scene is awfully familiar, although this time, Sara is giving her men the courtesy of talking.
“Ma’am, with all due respect,” The Okuzumeshuu stuttered out, ”This is very sudden.. T-The Almighty Shogun should not be intruded upon-"
"Takeshi," Sara interrupted. That's his name. She remembered each and every soldier under her. Their faces, their names, their positions, their characters. If Sara was of clearer mind, perhaps she would've noted some positive words alongside the guard's name. "I take responsibility for my actions and everything else that follows. I will speak in your favour. For now, please step aside, lest the events that took place that day repeat."
Takeshi hesitated, the gears grinding in his brain under pressure of those severe golden eyes. Sara waited patiently. She shan't take action until he has stated his stance.
The guard stepped aside, no words uttered— only a nod and a frown. Sara returned them with a glance, before going back to the large doors to Tenshukaku. She steeled herself for her encounter.
Yes, the encounter. A meeting. A talk with the Raiden Shogun. Her own voice screamed in her head at the mere prospect. An army general barging into the abode of a God, not to inform actions needed to be taken, not to speak on current issues, not to update on conditions unmet, but to report on a reason so selfish as her, and her own feelings. The door creaked loudly as she entered, and Sara stepped in, letting it shut behind her with an echoing thud.
The atmosphere was serene. The air was cool and the room was clean, spacious enough to house several pieces of furniture, a perfect and comfortable space befitting a God. Sara had been here a handful of times, but the most recent time was that day. The place had not changed even minutely since she last came. Every aspect from the walls, to the ceiling, to every speck of dust remained the same, as expected from eternity's abode.
Immediately, Sara felt a pair of eyes upon her. Familiar ones. The same violet eyes that have watched her rally her soldiers, prove her worth, and cut down any who refused to cooperate with eternity's ideals. They stared at her from across the room, the Almighty Shogun rousing from where she had meditated before Sara charged in with little decorum. "Trespassers are forbidden, General. Surely you know that?"
"Your Excellency," Sara greeted, "I apologize for my sudden visit. I have an…" Urgent matter to report. It's certainly an urgent matter, to her . "I have a matter to discuss."
There’s a beat of silence. Sara can’t be sure, but she swore she felt the air around the Almighty Shogun quiver, as if charged by lightning.
"Ah, you're the one she's so protective over." Sara blinked. Did she mishear that? The voice spoken by her God shifted suddenly. It was not entirely foreign, but not familiar, either. It's the same pitch, but lighter, less harsh, almost more carefree. It deeply unsettled Sara. “What matters did you wish to discuss? To the point, please.”
On a hunch, Sara dared to look her God in the eye. Her gaze had also lost the familiar steel her voice was lacking. It was calmer, more open and visibly curious— in contrast to the usual look of absolute icy resoluteness. This is not the deity Kujou Sara follows. But who was she to ask a thing so blasphemous as if there was something wrong with her God?
The Raiden Shogun's head tilted curiously, "You look troubled. Is something the matter?" Sara couldn’t answer that. Sara had to answer that, who did she think she was? Ignoring a question from her. "No, Your Excellency," She lied, "There's nothing of concern."
"I see.." Her God murmured, so quietly Sara was barely able to hear her. She lifted herself from where she sat, approaching her visitor while keeping a dignified distance. "Well, if nothing is the matter, what was so important that you barged into my abode like this without any warning whatsoever?"
It wasn’t important. It wasn’t important at all, and yet Sara had spontaneously rushed from the Grand Narukami Shrine all the way back to Tenshukaku with little more than feelings and flowery words that barely contributed to anything but her own selfish gain. If Takayuki were still around, he would've scolded her for smearing the Kujou Clan's reputation and her own by running around to her liking without thinking. Twice.
"I deeply apologize for my impertinence. This is not the first time this has happened and I am remorseful for interrupting Her Excellency's peace. However, I do have matters to inform Her about."
"Proceed."
Sara hesitated. The feathers on her back pricked with uncertainty as she looked up at the Almighty Shogun.
…
“I am Kujou Sara, adopted daughter of the Tenryou Commissions Kujou Clan. I have a simple declaration to make.”
"I am Kujou Sara, and I owe Her Excellency, the Raiden Shogun, The Almighty Narukami Ogosho my life the day she cast her gaze upon me and bestowed a vision as I fell from a great height as a child, saving me. I have since served Her Excellency relentlessly in her pursuit of eternity, and placed absolute trust in Her judgement. I am only alive because of Her, my devotion to Her is unbending. I needn't pursue anything else but Her will. “I am deeply grateful to the life given to me through a single moment in time."
“That being said,” The God’s gaze felt as if it were boring into her very soul. “I.. confess to You, Your Excellency. I harbour affections for you.” She’s gone too far to go back now. “I do not hope for reciprocation, I only hope to make Her Excellency aware of an ultimately insignificant general’s feelings.”
It was quiet for a long, horrible moment. The very air seemed to still with the gravity of her words, so thick with anticipation Sara nearly choked on it. Perhaps her God was only silent for a mere moment, but it felt like an eternity before Sara heard her speak again.
“Oh.” She murmured, voice still incredibly foreign. Sara froze in her tracks. “Then it is not me you wish to speak with…”
The same uncomfortable feeling crawled on her feathers. "Your Excellency?"
Again, something in the air seemed to shift around the God, a smoldering ripple of lightning in a stormcloud.
“Proceed, and spare no detail.”
It's back, the air rippling around its return like the shock of a storm. That hardened, freezing pitch that Sara revered so deeply all her life. Even the way she carried herself was back to normal. The normal that Sara was used to and recognized as her deity, anyway.
"My affections for Your Excellency are of no concern nor big matter, it is only a point when it has come about with my reverence. Thus it… does n… not… " Sara trailed off when she realised the Shogun approaching. The familiar click, click, getting louder until they finally reached their destination; right in front of the general.
“Your Excellency?
"You needn't exhaust yourself nor my time any longer."
Sara fell into a dead silence, eyes darting away and towards the wall past the Raiden Shogun. She had spoken too much. She will accept the consequences. It was the risk she took when she spontaneously decided to confess to a God. Her God. The sound of heels clicking felt agonizingly slow to Sara’s ears as the Almighty Shogun leaves her peripheral, circling around her.
"I have found myself growing fond of you, General," The Shogun admitted. If Sara hadn’t been frozen by her deities previous words she certainly was now. Fond? In what way? Yes, she had caught the eye of the Almighty Shogun once, but now? What was she even allowed to think now? Not much that she dared to. Her God continued, "It is not a recent feeling, yet only now have I been able to place what a sudden shift in my judgement is."
"However, I am Raiden Ei's right hand. I am only a harbinger of Her will." The Shogun reentered her vision, right back to in front of Sara. Her headspace cannot leave the current situation. Nothing else matters. Not right now.
“The transience of my affections is problematic.” Sara felt a soft, almost porcelain hand on her chin, gently forcing her gaze to fully face her God. “While you are not human, you are still mortal. She, as the creator, can have the fox, but the transience of a being such as yourself and my status as a machine is a threat to eternity.”
“I should terminate you right now," She mused.
Sara felt the hand travel from her chin to the her neck, the sensation had her hold back a shiver, chills pricking at her back. Then, it began to crush. “Your Excellency,” Sara choked out. No, Sara is not human, but the sheer strength of a body hardened by centuries of combat is no match for even a Youkai. “If my passing means another step to the eternity you pursue, then it would be an honour to-” The hand tightened and tightened, for a moment Sara feared she would not be able to complete her sentence. But she has to.
“An honour to- die by your hands.”
The Almighty Shogun let go of her grip. Sara gasped for air at the sudden removal, stumbling back and almost falling over entirely before catching herself. She grasped her neck, heaving for oxygen.
“Of course, that is the course of action I would follow if She were to pursue the path of eternity of the past.” The Shogun continued, as if nothing had happened at all. “Now, She seeks a… different one.”
Turning away from Sara, she walked and stopped. She sounded contemplative, pondering. “Even after a clash of ideals, I am merely her assistant.”
“However, if the eternity She seeks now is transience…” Sara could feel the piercing gaze return to her, the feeling is akin to when she is facing an opponent sizing her up to see if they can take her in a battle. “I ask you, General.”
“Would you like to pursue the eternity of yore, or the eternity of the present?” Her voice is cold. Devoid of anything human in a single, clinical question. “After all, you have been a dutiful subject since prior to the new goal. Which are you to follow?”
Sara’s answer is the same. “I follow the Eternity sought by you, Your Excellency.”
“And you are aware that I am a puppet for my creator, the true electro archon.”
It will always be the same. “I have followed Her Excellency my whole life, whether it turns out She is a puppet or not, She is who I worship.”
For the first time, Sara saw amusement. Amusement in the normally frozen expression strewn across her God’s face. Amusement at her confession and declaration of absolute devotion to the Almighty Shogun’s eternity. Had she made a mistake? Who was she kidding? This whole extravaganza had been a string of mistakes concocted by her stubborn decisions born out of spontaneity. Amusement? Was her God toying with her? No. The Almighty Shogun did not toy with anything or anyone, she was much too busy for that. Sara will find peace in the fact that this.. acceptance was another step towards the eternity She seeks.
Sara cleared her throat. “I am sincerely grateful for Her Excellency’s time, I do not wish to take more of it.“ She gave a deep bow, “I shall take my leave, please excuse me.”
“Halt.” The Shogun stared at her, that foreign expression wiped clean off of her face. “No. Stay awhile.”
…
“Of course, Your Excellency.”