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It was 11:45pm on a breezy Friday night.
On the top of a hill at the end of the street stood a humble home that happened to be the residence of a Wilbur Soot. It also happened that this night the said humble home was hosting a boisterous start of the summer party. All sorts of people getting together, the college grads, students, highschool seniors, dropouts. It was a bang, and everyone was partying it out.
Or, mostly everyone. If you were to enter the party and go to the back of the house to the end of the living room, you’d find a boy checking his cell phone, waiting for his partner who has yet to appear or send notice.
“Hi Tommy!” Wilbur calls and walks over with Quackity attached to his hip.
“Not now Wilbur..” Tommy groans.
“Hey Tomas! Whats got you so in the mood dude? It’s a party! Why aren't you dancing?”
Tommy reacts with a face of surprise, contemplation, and then turns around with a furrow of his brow. “Yeah its a great party and what not. Why don’t you two idiots go and enjoy it then, leave me be.”
Quackity growls. “Hey man, I was just trying to lighten your mood -”
Wilbur then interrupts him, placing his fingers to the other’s lips. “Hush Duck.” He says with a smile. “You go get us some more drinks, I’ll deal with the child, I’m sure he’s just cranky.” He smiles.
“Fine Soot.” He says with a shake of his head. “But don’t take too long cariño, I heard they’ll be busting out the slow dance soon.”
Quackity boops Wilburs nose, who just smiles. “Yes of course, dear.” They then give each other a kiss, and Tommy just turns away not wanting to have to see the pair.
After they’ve finished and Quackity has walked back to the kitchen, Wilbur approaches Tommy once more.
“So I’m guessing he hasn’t responded.” Wilbur states more than asks.
Tommy just nods with his eyes scrunched shut. Trying to resist the urge to cry.
Wilbur comes to his side, and takes the phone from his hands. “Don’t sit here and let it bring you down so much Toms, I’m sure he has some reason, but it still would have been kind of him to give you a warning.”
Tommy opens his eyes, and looks up at Wilbur. “I just, I know he’s got his reserves, and we’ve talked about it, but I really thought he would be here. I don’t think I’m asking that much of him, just for a dance at a party!”
“I know Toms I know. And I hope you two can get things better sorted out soon. Now come and dance with the rest of our gang, stop wallowing here by yourself.”
Tommy is hesitant to stand up and abandon his waiting by his phone, but he eventually complies with Wilbur. Wilbur brings him to the crowd of his closest friends, and they all dance together for a good while.
But eventually the slow song comes out, and that's when Tommy decides to take his leave.
He sighs as he checks his messages, wondering why his partner never came.
It’s Saturday afternoon and Ranboo is on his usual route to drive by and pick Tommy up for the weekend after his Saturday class. He pulls into the dance studio lot and parks, then waits for Tommy to exit.
He’s a little worried about what Tommy might say about the previous day, but he’s sure his boyfriend was fine with it, I mean it was just a party, and Tommy knows how anxious he gets.
Right on time, he sees Tommy exiting the studio with some of his friends. Ranboo gets out and stands by the car door ready to open it for the other.
“Hello goldie.” He says.
Tommy turns to him quickly and furrows his brows. He asks his friends to give him a minute, and then he walks over to the taller, with his arms crossed.
“Hello Boo.” He says back. “What happened to last night, and why couldn’t you just message me. You had me waiting like a fool.”
Ranboo took a step back, not exactly expecting Tommy to feel and react this way.
“Oh, I, I’m sorry Tommy. Look, I I meant to go. But then I just got so nervous, you understand that don’t you. I mean us showing up at a party and dancing together, people could definity have connected the dots that we’re together.”
“And is there something so wrong with people knowing you're with me?” Tommy questioned.
Ranboo sputtered. “No. no of course not. I just mean I’m not ready to come out yet.”
“Then you better keep it down.” Tommy dead panned and pointed to his friends.
“Yeah, yeah right.” Ranboo said. Then he turned back to Tommy. “Well the point is that I was going to go with you darlin, but then I just got a little overwhelmed and I knew you would understand.”
Ranboo leans it to brush the blondes hair, but he grabs the American's wrist and stops him.
“No ‘Darlins’ today Boo. You could have at least messaged me.” Tommy pushes his hand away and starts walking away as well.
“Wait!” Ranboo says. “Where are you going? I’m supposed to drive you to my place for the weekend.”
“I’m going over to Sasha’s” Tommy shouts back. “I need a little space right now, and we’re going to work and get ready for the recital.”
And Ranboo just watches in slight shock as Tommy walks away and gets in his friend’s car.
Eventually it’s just Ranboo left in the parking lot, so he loads himself up and gets home alone. It’s strange, Tommy and him have hung out during the weekend for their whole relationship. They’re not so ready for people to know about them publicly, so the weekend is when they get their alone time.
He tries to distract himself with tv and reading, anything, but in the end it is fruitless. The couch feels too cold when he’s all on his own. He turns his phone on and cringes that he never ended up answering Tommy’s texts. He decides to just text him a goodnight, and head to bed himself after he’s had dinner.
Ranboo walks over and brushes the empty bed reserved for Tommy, that will remain empty this week.
_
The next few days go by smoothly yet tiringly. Still no word from Tommy, but Ranboo has seen pictures of him and Tubbo together, so he knows the blonde is ok. It’s now Wednesday, and Ranboo is once again driving to Tommy’s studio to pick him up for their usual Whenday outing and dinner.
He gets there a bit late and is afraid that Tommy may have gotten a ride with someone else, but he decides to go in and check, and sure enough, there the blonde is.
He watches as Tommy graciously does a dash into a jete, then landing in a plie and going into an Arabesque. He smiles upon his boyfriend’s wonderful ballet skills. He decides to clap when He’s sure the blond is done.
“Woohoo!” He cheers. “Wonderful job darlin.” He compliments. But when he opens his eyes, Tommy doesn’t look pleased. Infact, he’s looks to be awkwardly hugging himself.
“Tom, Tommy, is something wrong?” He decides to ask. Tommy looks at him and makes an awkward nod. But before Ranboo can ask what it is, he sees Tommy talking to someone else, and he realizes the two were not alone in the room. That there was in fact another man in there with them watching their exchange.
“I’ll be right there.” Tommy says to the man. “Just go ahead without me.” The man leaves, and Ranboo is confused by what he overheard. Is Tommy not going to be going back with him today? But it’s been so long since they got to hang out.
“Tommy, hon” He says. “Whats the matter, are you not coming over today?”
Tommy just sighs and shakes his head as he bends down to pick up his bag and take his shoes off. “Boo-ak. Ranboo look, we need to talk.”
Ranboo fears where this might be going.
“Yes?” He says.
“It’s about the other day.” Tommy says, not even looking at Ranboo.
“Yes, what about it?” Ranboo asks.
Tommy sighs. “I know it was just a party, and I totally get that you might not be the most comfortable going to them, that you easily get overwhelmed, but it was important to me.” He finally looks Ranboo in the eyes.
“And you, you don’t seem to care much about it.” Tommy looks away.
Ranboo gasps. “Oh no, oh no no no. Of course I care Tommy.” He says. “I -I just hadn’t realized what a big deal this was to you. I thought you had everyone else there, so you wouldn’t mind if I didn’t attend.”
“Arg.” Tommy groans. “But I wanted you there. I just wanted to dance with you.”
“But, but wouldn’t that give away our relationship?” Ranboo asks.
“I Don’t know!” Tommy throws his arms in the air. “Maybe it would maybe it wouldn't. There are plenty of friends who dance together though, so it shouldn’t be some big deal. And whats so wrong with people knowing you’re together with me?”
“Arg” Now Ranboo is getting annoyed. “Again, there’s nothing wrong with it, I’m just no-”
“Not ready to come out yet, I know. And there lies the problem.” Tommy softens up.
“What?” Ranboo asks.
Tommy sighs once again. “The problem, Ranboo, is that you aren't ready for people to know you’re in a not straight relationship yet, which kinda makes you’re not ready for a relationship. Which is fine, I totally get it. But, ha, I need someone who can give me the attention and time that I need, and I don’t think that's you right now.”
Ranboo can’t believe what he’s hearing. “Wait,” he says, “are, are you breaking up with me?” He asks.
Tommy closes his eyes and tips his head against the wall. “What I’m saying is, that we need a break.” He stands up taller. “You don’t have to come to pick me up from practice anymore for the time being. Jacob, who was just here with us, will be taking me home from now on. Goodbye Ranboo, have a good rest of your day.”
And Ranboo can only watch as Tommy exits the room, building, and drives away with whoever Jacob is.
He, he needs a minute to catch his breath, for it to really resonate to him what just happened. Tommy, Tommy just broke up with him. They’re no longer together.
He, he lost Tommy just cause he wasn’t willing for people to see them together. He scrunches his eyes closed and pulls his hair a little. Stupid Stupid Stupid.
All Tommy had wanted was for HIM to be at that party, for them to have one dance together, and now, now Tommy’s off, probably dancing with Jacob.
He blew it.
He sadly pulls himself up, and makes his way back to his car. Once he’s there, he puts on the radio, and immediately hears Taylor Swift “Lover”, one of their songs. It holds a new meaning and feeling now.
He tries to switch the channel to something else, but nothing feels right. He ends up on some Justin Bieber song.
It’s another day of pulling in home all alone. Except this time, he really is alone.
He’s hanging with a lot of his friends the coming weekend. Where he’d usually be hanging with Tommy, he now has nothing to do, so why not hang more with the group.
They simply met up for bowling, but had an hour to wait until they’d be let in. So while they waited they all sat together outside a chick-fil-a.
Things are going relatively well, but he feels a little left out though. Almost everyone else there is together with their partner. Wilbur and Quackity are making out in the corner of his eye, and just ew, he’d actually just rather look away. Niki and Puffy are chatting about something to his left. And George and Dream have yet to return with their food. At least Ranboo has Tubbo though. Tubbo was supposed to come with his partner, but they unfortunately couldn’t make it.
He sighs, it seems like all his friends have it all so much better figured out. He berates himself though. He could be sitting here happily with Tommy, looking lovingly and dopily into his eyes, if only he had had the courage and realized it sooner.
Like seriously, why was he afraid to come out and for all his friends to know about them? None of them would have judged them, they’d be happy. He’s so dumb.
Dream and Geroge eventually come back, and then everyone is dishing out their food. There isn’t actually that much room at the table they're sitting at outside, so Ranboo scoots over to a different table to give the couples all their room. He feels quite jealous of them all.
“Hey Ranboo,” Tubbo walks up to him. He turns to look at his friend who is munching on a chicken strip.
“Yes?” He says.
Tubbo just keeps chewing and it starts to get on Ranboo’s nerves. “What's got you so down buddy?”
Ranboo bites his lip a little, he isn’t sure what to say. But he decides on something. “Have you talked to Tommy lately?” He asks.
“Oh Tommy!?” Tubbo says. “Yeah we’ve chatted, but he’s pretty busy getting ready for their summer show or whatever, so we haven't hung out much.”
Oh right, Tommy summer show, how could Ranboo have forgotten. He frowns at himself. He really is the worst boyfriend.
“Why’d you ask?” Tubbo pipes up.
“Oh. Ah, no real reason. We-we just haven't seen or talked to each other in a while, so I was curious.”
Tubbo smirks at him. “No, I know there’s something more.”
Ranboo begins to sweat a little looking left and right for an exit or escape.
“You guys both mysteriously disappearing for the weekends, I bet you’ve been hanging out. Are you getting sweet for my best friend Ran?” Tubbo asks and if Ranboo is being honest, it’s like staring in the eyes of the devil.
“No.” He weakly says. Tubbo just shakes his head disapprovingly. “Well, I mean, if we were, would you, be ok with it, that is. Hehe.”
“Of course I would.” Tubbo says matter of factly. “You guys accepted me and Remy, so of course I’d accept my two best buds.”
Ranboo nervously chuckles. Yeah, what was he ever afraid for. He’s an idot. “Well, thank you Tubbo.” He says. “But sorry to disappoint, but Tommy and I are not together in fact.” He smiles, and hopes Tubbo will just take it and not press.
Thank goodness for his own health, Tubbo does. “Well alrighty.”
They go in for bowling soon after that. It’s a good time, Ranboo gets a couple strikes, but things just aren't the same without Tommy being there laughing along. Ranboo honestly came to this hoping to avoid and stop thinking about Tommy, but everything just seems to remind him of his once blonde.
It doesn’t help when his friends just keep bringing Tommy up as well. Everytime Tommy’s name is mentioned, it's like nails hitting into Ranboo’s heart with just how much he’s messed up. It really shouldn’t have been that hard to supply for Tommy. All tommy really wanted, was the time, attention, and care. Ranboo can now think of a million things he could have done, to show Tommy just how much he cared for him. But it’s too late now.
Bowling wraps up well, and everyone is saying their goodnights. Ranboo is one of the last people left, being in no rush to get home. He’s clearing their table up a bit and leaving out the door though, when he sees Wilbur walk back up to him.
“Oh hi Wilbur.” He says. “Aren't you leaving with Quackity? Why’d you come back in here? Oh! Did you forget anything, I didn’t see anything at the table, I-”
“Shush.” Wilbur says. “No need to worry Ranbus. I simply came in to have a quick chat with you.”
“Oh?” Ranboo asks. “What about?”
“It’s about Tommy.” Wilbur says.
“Oh.” Ranboo responds. “Arg, what about him?” He tries to act clueless.
Wilbur just shakes his head. “Tsk tsk boy. You can drop it now. I know.”
“You, you do?” Ranboo asks.
Wilbur hums. “Tommy was never very good at keeping secrets, and also I was the one he initially came to when he was nervous about asking you out. So of course he had to tell me when you accepted, and then he just needed someone to talk to about things sometimes, and I was there for him.”
“Oh.” Ranboo said. Guess that's another thing he did wrong. He knows Tommy likes to talk, and it was probably really hard on the blonde to try to make him keep it all to himself. He’s so selfish.
“And Ranboo.” Wilbur says. “He’s told me about what's happened recently, and I care deeply about how you treat Toms.”
“Yes, yes of course.”
“And I know you hurt him, even if you didn’t mean to.”
“Yes, I know, and I’m so sorry, how can I fix it?”
Wilbur sighs. “I’m not sure there is a way to fix it really, that is up to Toms, but I know you should try. You should give Tommy the time he needs away from you to himself, so he can gather his own thoughts, but you shouldn’t give up on him. I know Tommy cared so very deeply for you before, and I don’t believe that all that love he held for you could simply disappear.”
“Oh, ok, so what do I do?” Ranboo asked.
“Go to his recital.” Wilbur says. “Go to see and support him, and show him that you do care. Apologize, and then see where you both are. That's my advice.”
Ranboo smiles. “Yes, thank you. Thank you Wilbur.” He says, hugging the older. “Thank you, and again I’m sorry, I never meant it hurt Tommy. Thank you for caring and wanting to help.”
Wilbur chuckled. “Of course Ranbus. I’m here for you little idiots.”
“Hey!”
“Hahah.”
And the end of the day didn’t turn out to be so bad.
After that it was just waiting. He had basically one month till Tommy’s recital, and had to figure out what he was going to say. He continued with his regular life, and he tried not to worry too much about how Tommy was, trusting the others to take care of him. He just had to perfect his apology and be ready for the day of the recital.
Eventually the day arrived. Ranboo dressed himself up, went out and bought a bouquet, and walked into the theater, after purchasing himself a ticket and a nice seat in advance. And then all there was to do was sit down, and wait.
He saw a few of the others walk in, and he said his hello and then went back to his seat. Shortly enough, the show began.
The show turned out to be breathtaking. There was no sure set theme or story, simply each class performing their representation of summer and spring. Dancers coming out on ponte, leaps, and spins. The gracious flow of the dancers and their rhythm.
And eventually it happened, Tommy came out doing an elegant bourrée en couru. Then shifting into a pirouette twirl once in the middle. Tommy continued his pirouette while lots of others did jetes all around him. Tommy then stopped in third position, and then plied into a Cabriole.
The crowd clapped and Tommy landed gracefully and the dancers all continued on stage. Ranboo stared joyfully at Tommy’s bright shining smile while he jumped, and turned, and danced on the stage.
Tommy’s group finished their turn, and then a few other groups went out before they all returned again for the bows.
Ranboo stood, clapped, and cheered loudly from his seat as the dancers all took their bows. And he cheers the loudest for Tommy, wondering if the blonde had spotted him.
After the curtains shut, people began exiting the auditorium. Ranboo made his exit and went around back towards the dressing rooms, where he waited for Tommy to exit himself.
Time passed, and Ranboo kept checking his watch. He feared that the blonde had seen and not wanted to talk to him. Or the blond took a different exit, but sure enough, after a bit more waiting Tommy walked out, with a smile upon his face.
Ranboo quickly turned around after noticing the blonde. He sputtered and stared in amazement at Tommy’s wondrous shining face. He looked magnificent.
“T-Tommy.” He said.
Tommy then looked over inquisitively. “Ranboo.” He said.
“Hello there, you, you came. I wasn’t sure if you would.”
Ranboo smiled. “What do you mean Goldie, I wouldn’t miss your big show.”
Tommy frowned a bit at the nickname, and Ranboo realized his mistake.
“Sorry,” he said.
He then handed the bouquet to Tommy. “Here, these are for you.”
“Oh, why thank you. They look lovely,” Tommy smiled, while inspecting the flowers.
“You look lovely.” Ranboo whispered.
“What was that?” Tommy smiled.
“No-nothing.” Ranboo quickly said back.
It was then quiet for a moment.
“So,” Tommy prompted, moving a strand of his hair from his face. “Is there anything else I can help you with?”
Ranboo nervously chuckled. Suddenly forgetting everything he had planned to say, and feeling very underprepared.
“Well, uh-I. I wanted to say I’m sorry Tommy.”
“Oh?” Tommy looked at him in slight confusion.
“For being such a bad boyfriend.”
Tommy looked around nervously. “Shsush, boo, what if someone hears you,”
“I don’t care if they hear.” Ranboo smiled. “I don’t care if anybody knows, cause I should have been ok with it from the beginning.”
Tommy stared at him in question.
“I’m sorry Tommy, for making you ever feel less than you are.” Ranboo said. “For making you ever think I was afraid for being seen or connected to you, I wasn’t. You are the most wonderful, amazing, and talented person I could ever be associated with. I appreciate you so much, and I’m sorry I didn’t make that more known.”
Tommy looked at him caringly, and gave a small smile and blush.
“I’m sorry I didn’t do enough for you Tommy.” Ranboo stated. “I should have shown you all my time, made sure you knew you were appreciated, loved, and cared for. I’m sorry for being afraid, and for letting my personal issues get in the way of our relationship.”
“It really wasn’t that bad.” Tommy said. “I’ll never fault you for being who you are and not being up for some activities.”
“Yes.” Ranboo smiled. “And that's one of the things I love about you, how much you care. But no, I could have done more. I could have communicated more to you, or we could have gone and found other things to do alternatively. I’m sorry for hurting you Tommy, and not giving you your dance.”
“And I’m not here to ask for you back, just for you to accept my apology, and for us to still get to be friends.” Ranboo smiled.
“I hope that you’ll be happy. And that Jacob, he treats you right. I hope he buys you flowers, and holds your hand. That he gives you all his hours, takes you to all the parties, cause I know how much you love to dance, and does all the things I should have done, when I was your man.”
Tommy starters to giggle. “Hahaha, did you just quote a Bruno Mars song?”
Ranboo smiles back. “Yes, yes I did.”
“Ranboo.” Tommy says sweetly. “Thank you for the apology, it really does mean so much to hear.”
“A few things though, one, Jacob and I aren’t together, haha, he’s just a dance friend. And two, of course I still want to be your friend, you can’t get rid of me that easily.”
Ranboo smiles, and Tommy gives him that smirk he just all but adores.
“To be honest.” Tommy then begins to shy away a little. “Ranboo of course I still have feelings for you, I can’t get over you that easily.” He looks back at Ranboo. “I still love you, and I want it to work between us. But, at the same time, I do think we should both take a little more time to prepare ourselves before we commit to a relationship.”
“I understand.” Ranboo says. And he does. As much as he wants Tommy, he wants them both to be comfortable and ready first.
“So I have to be going now.” Tommy says to him. “Thank you for the flowers, and for coming and seeing the show. I hope you enjoyed.”
“No problem.” Ranboo says. “And don’t worry, I did. You were extraordinary.”
Tommy blushes again and tries to hide it, but there’s nowhere to hide.
“Well then for now.” Tommy says, getting closer and leaning into Ranboo. “This is goodbye.” And he kisses him on the cheek, and then waves goodbye.
Ranboo smiles and waves goodbye. Then once Tommy is out of view, he touches his cheek where the blonde had kissed him.
He may not have Tommy, but he’s learned a lot, and is ready to start preparing himself so he’lll be ready next time. To be someone’s man. And who knows, maybe he can someday be Tommy’s again.
He can only hope.