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Jan was not one to use many nicknames. Matthew was more than okay with that. After all, the Dutchman showed him how much he loved him in other special ways. But that wasn’t to say Jan never used nicknames.
The first time Jan used the nickname was before they weren't even dating. Matthew had found him barely conscious, covered in dirt and rubble in a crumbling building. Acting quickly, Matthew had rushed in, and although Jan was slightly larger than him, Matthew was strong and lifted him onto his back. Jan had made no sound, no movement, so Matthew had assumed he was passed out. That was until he started mumbling. It was in Dutch, so Matthew couldn’t make out what he was saying other than one word “Engel.” ‘Angel’ in English if Matthew’s memory served him. Ignoring the way the word made his heart flutter, he picked up his pace. Jan was out of it; it probably meant nothing.
Then there was the time when Jan was in the hospital, recovering from the damage done by the war. Matthew had taken to spending most of his free time by Jan’s bedside, assisting the nurses and doctors in any way he could. Jan hadn’t woken since he was first brought in--and that was a month or two ago. But one day, he started mumbling again. Slurred Dutch that Matthew couldn’t make out. “Mijn Engel?” Jan said, eyes cracked open and looking straight at Matthew. There he went again, sending Matthew’s heart into erratic thumping. Trying to ignore the heat rising in his own cheeks, Matthew laid a cool cloth on Jan’s forehead
“You have a fever,” Matthew explained softly, “Just rest.”
Jan grumbled some more before his eyes closed and his breath evened out. 'It was just his fever,' Matthew thought to himself
Matthew wouldn’t hear the nickname again until years later when they were both in a better place and could relax with each other as friends. The affectionate murmurs seemed long forgotten by both. That was until one drunken night when down at the dock at Matthew’s cottage, Jan had said those fateful words once again: “But really Matt…You’re like…Mijn Engel.” They were both pretty intoxicated, but Matthew still had enough sense to hear those words and know what they meant. Matthew had laughed it off as drunken rambling and ignored the way Jan leaned in after saying that.
But his favorite time was after the first night they spent together. After decades of dancing around each other, they finally had confessed. After about a year of dating, they slept together. The morning after was even sappier than the night before. Matthew awoke warm and content with Jan cuddled up, right against his back. He was murmuring into the crook of Matthew’s neck. “Good morning Mijn Engel,” he whispered into his ear.
“Morning,” Matthew replied with a smile. Turning around he placed a loving kiss on Jan’s lips. Short, but sweet. “You’re so cute.”
“Mmm…Am not.”
“Are too.” Matthew snuggled closer and placed a tender kiss on the love bite he had left on the Dutchman’s collarbone the night before. Jan relaxed against him, almost seeming to melt into his arms. A few more kisses and caresses were shared before Matthew started nodding off again. With one final kiss on the top of his head, Matthew was out like a light.