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“You don’t have to do this Jonah…please…I’m begging, just let him go.”
Eddie’s voice hitched around the bulge in his throat. He was tied to a chair with ropes so tight he’d lost feeling in his hands and feet, but he didn’t give a fuck about himself. It was Buck, laying comatose on a table just an arm’s length away, cardiac electrodes dotted across his bare chest and an intravenous drip in the back of his hand pumping him full of a powerful sedative, that was turning him into a teary, snotty-nosed, emotional wreck.
Jonah Greenway, a capable paramedic with a sadistic disposition and a nasty jealous streak, stood by the table.
“Haven’t you figured it out yet Diaz? Firefighter Buckley is here to serve a purpose and once he’s done that, of course I will let him go.” He smirked, using air quotes for effect.
It was more than Eddie could take. The steady beep of the heart monitor with its regular peaks and troughs was the only thing keeping him partway sane at this point, a blunt reminder that Buck’s coding heart had just been shocked back into life, but it seemed the highly trained madman wasn’t finished his sick game just yet, meaning Buck’s life still hung in the balance.
The jingle of a notification alert was loud in the space and had Jonah scrambling to retrieve his phone from his back pocket.
While Jonah was distracted, Eddie kept his eyes on Buck, flashes of memory crowding through his head; of Buck and how seamlessly he had fit into his and Christopher’s lives, from saving Christopher in a tsunami and always being there for his son when Eddie couldn’t, to his love and support through Eddie’s PTSD and every nurturing act of kindness in between. It seemed everything good in his life was connected to Buck and he couldn’t bear the thought of losing him, not now, not ever and especially not like this.
Eddie flinched when Jonah clapped his hands, snapping him back from his thoughts.
“Stop daydreaming Diaz, I don’t want you missing a thing.” Jonah sniggered, as he walked his fingertips up over the broad expanse of Buck’s bare chest, brushing a thumb over his nipples, smiling as they peaked up for him. He leant over to whisper words Eddie couldn’t quite hear into Buck’s ear as he moved his hands to stroke and caress the lax face like a lover would do.
“Jealous yet?” Jonah asked, not bothering to look up as his hands slid down to wrap gently around Buck’s throat.
Eddie felt sick. Was this all on him for rejecting a maniac’s advances, advances he couldn’t even remember the man making? He barely knew Jonah; it didn’t make sense.
Jonah’s fingers tightened, the seductive caresses turning murderous, squeezing Buck’s airway with a bruising grip powerful enough to asphyxiate him within minutes.
“Stop it Jonah! You’re killing him!” Eddie yelled, as he rocked hysterically back and forth on the chair legs, fighting against the ropes with every fiber of his being.
“Funny, isn’t it?” Jonah said, ignoring Eddie’s attempts to escape. “With all these muscles and the strength of an Adonis, he’s just putty in my hands. You know I would have been putty in yours if you’d have let me.”
I’m going to kill you, Eddie vowed, still struggling to free himself.
It took less than a minute without oxygen for Buck’s lips to start turning an ominous shade and for the monitor to register an irregular heartbeat, but it seemed Jonah didn’t want his power game to end just yet, because at the critical moment he stopped choking Buck and ruffled his hair in a parody of affection before turning his attention to the crash cart behind him.
“Well, that was a bit of fun,” Jonah chuckled, his back to Eddie.
It wasn’t until Buck’s lips regained their natural color and his heart rate improved that Eddie slumped, exhausted and lightheaded, his own heart thudding loudly in his ears.
The bastard was just toying with them, but Eddie knew the end was coming. Jonah might be out of his mind but he wasn’t crazy enough to leave witnesses behind. Eddie’s thoughts turned back to Chris, devastated his son was going to grow up without either his dad or Buck by his side, a cruel blow considering he had made provision in his will for Buck to raise Chris if he couldn’t.
Movement from the table caught Eddie’s attention and his hopes lifted when Buck’s head rolled to the side, facing him. Buck groaned and his eyes fluttered but he didn’t surface again.
“Looks like your boy is fighting the propofol, but it won’t do him any good,” Jonah said as he turned back from the trolley with a fresh syringe in his hand.
Eddie started praying.
Jonah flicked the cap off the syringe and held the clear tube up to the light as if admiring its contents before lining the tip of the needle up with the cannula in the back of Buck’s hand.
“No, no, no, for the love of God,” Eddie begged. “We can work this out, there’s no reason...”
“Too late for a change of heart now Diaz,” Jonah said cutting him off sharply. “It’s ironic really, you have a Silver Star, you spend your days playing hero and saving lives, yet it was me who saved lover boy here without even a sniff of gratitude from you. I’m a compassionate man Diaz, but my sympathy for you and Buckley has expired. Sorry, not sorry,” Jonah said, snorting a laugh.
Eddie’s face crumpled.
… tomorrow isn’t promised to anyone so if you love her, tell her.
The wise words he once shared with Chim now mocked him. Why hadn’t he taken his own damn advice?
In a last ditched effort, Eddie changed tactics. Pleading hadn’t worked but goading the bastard just might. If nothing else, it would draw Jonah’s attention away from Buck and onto himself. He had nothing to lose.
Eddie cleared his throat and let go of his barely controlled rage. “Jonah, you gutless prick, let’s have this out right now. You and me, man to man or don’t you have the balls? Untie me, I fucking dare you to!”
Eddie tipped his head in Bucks direction. “This has nothing to do with him and everything to do with your own pathetic insecurities.”
He knew he had hit a nerve when Jonah’s expression hardened, and his voice lifted an octave.
“Buckley has everything to do with you denying me, which makes this is the perfect retribution.” Jonah rolled his shoulders and cracked his neck before continuing in a calm, almost cheerful tone. “Besides, I’m having a good time. I get to practice my resus skills and I get to see you squirm, so it’s a win, win.”
The smirk on Jonah’s lips widened as he pressed the point of the needle into the cannula and depressed the plunger without hesitation.
“I’m going to fucking kill you,” Eddie ground out through his clenched teeth, straining against his bindings until the flagging beeps from the heart monitor morphed into a solid monotone sound.
Eddie sagged, his chin falling onto his chest utterly defeated, his mutinous sobs doing nothing to block out the awful noise.
“He’s all yours Diaz,” Jonah said, his tone casual.
Eddie looked up to see Jonah swing a backpack over his shoulder and saunter toward the door. “Now you two enjoy yourselves,” he added, disappearing from view.
“F-fucking bastard!” Eddie stammered; his burning eyes fixed on Buck’s chest, willing it to rise, but the medic in him knew it wasn’t going to happen without human intervention. In four minutes Buck’s brain would be irreversibly damaged, in six, his organs would be shutting down and in eight to ten, it would all be over, so he didn’t have the luxury of time to contemplate Jonah’s whereabouts.
Frantic, he scanned the room for something, anything he could use to free his hands, but time felt like it was on fast forward and any rational thoughts he might have had were scrambled by a heart-thumping fear that Jonah could return any second, like this was a B grade movie where the killer comes back before it’s all over.
Then, when all hope of saving Buck seemed lost, his eyes settled on a metal cabinet on the far wall, and he had an epiphany.
His legs were rubbery as he heaved himself to his feet, his movements slow and clumsy with his body folded around the chair and his ankles tied. But he was single minded now, drawing on the adrenaline flooding his limbs as he bunny hopped to the cabinet.
“Come on!” he shouted, pushing himself hard, deliberately blocking the familiar tone of a life on the cusp, knowing that if he gave a moment’s thought to Buck’s present condition he would fall apart.
Lining the chair up with the corner of the cabinet, he swung hard. The sound of wood splitting spurred him on, and he swung again and again until the chair splintered and fell apart, freeing his hands.
“I’m coming Buck, hang on, hang on,” he panted, bunny hopping back across the room to the table, tears threatening again as he stood over Buck’s lifeless body.
Gathering the defib paddles in numb fingers, he held them above Buck’s chest, checking the charge before administering the shock.
“Come on Buck, come on.”
Nothing changed.
“Fuck! Come on Buck, you have to fight.”
Eddie was about to administer a second shock when a hand landed firmly on his shoulder from behind.
What the hell?
Somehow, he instinctively knew it wasn’t Jonah.
Eddie’s confusion deepened when he began shaking uncontrollably, so much so, he couldn’t position the paddles where they needed to be.
“Get off!” Eddie shouted, shrugging the hand away, not ready to give up, not wanting to hear it was too late. Unshed tears obscured his vision and the paddles blurred in his hands.
“No! No, no, this can’t be happening.”
“Eddie, are you with me?”
At the sound of a familiar voice he jolted, suddenly unsure of himself and confused, his breath coming in shredded huffs and heart racing as one foot lingered in his grief-stricken ethereal world while the other slowly descended into reality. He blinked, his eyes adjusting in the semi-darkness, eternally grateful for the Buck-shaped shadow leaning over him.
“Sorry to wake you,” Buck apologized, his tone soft as he pushed sweat-soaked hair from Eddie’s forehead. “I could hear you yelling all the way from the couch, and I won’t lie, it sounded rough.”
Eddie shivered and unclenched his fists, releasing the crumpled bedsheets from his grip. He looked about in the half light, gradually making out the features of his bedroom. He dropped his head back onto his pillow with a groan and closed his eyes, schooling his breathing to a manageable level while his heart rate began to slow.
Suddenly his eyes opened. “Chris?” he croaked, looking past Buck to his bedroom door.
“He’s all good Eds, I’ve checked on him, that kid would sleep through an earthquake.”
“Thanks,” Eddie replied, sinking back into his mattress.
“I-um, I know it is not my business, but I-I’m um here if you want to talk about it.” Buck stammered, sliding his fingers to the pulse point on Eddie’s wrist.
Eddie huffed out a sigh and once Buck was satisfied with the tempo of his pulse, Eddie reached over to turn the side lamp on.
The light chased the last vestiges of the nightmare away, but Eddie’s relief was tempered with his newfound insight into the terror that Hen and Chim had suffered at the hands of that nutter. And with his new appreciation came concern for the long-term emotional toll it would have on his friends, but they had both survived and for now, that was enough.
But the question begged, why had his subconscious conjured up this disturbing version explicitly for him and Buck? He barely knew Jonah, yet Buck had somehow become a pawn in what, a jealousy triangle? Was this the universe screaming at him or a timely reminder that tomorrow isn’t promised to anyone?
“Hey Eds, are you with me?” Buck said, his voice laced with concern.
Eddie shuddered. “Yeah, sorry, I was miles away. Look, I promise I will call Frank in the morning and make an appointment,” he said, trying to sound as if he hadn’t just been utterly traumatized. “I think I will leave it to the expert to unpick what it all means.”
Buck straightened from his squat alongside the bed and lowered himself onto the edge of the mattress. “Well, I count that as progress. I’m glad you have Frank to talk to.”
“I’m sorry I woke you,” Eddie said, drinking in the sleep addled appeal of his bare-chested house mate.
“What’s the good of having a couch surfer if they can’t save you from your nightmares, eh?” Buck angled his head and huffed out a smile. “Can I get you something? Cup of tea, water…or something stronger?”
Eddie cleared his throat. “I’ve got everything I need right here,” he said, placing his palm flat over Buck’s heart, feeling the strong rhythmic beat in his chest.
Buck looked puzzled by the intimate touch. His lips parted, eyes narrowed, and his brows puckered in his best ‘bewildered Buck’ expression, but it wasn’t long before comprehension replaced confusion and a Colgate smile appeared on those luscious lips of his.
Eddie would make the appointment in the morning like he’d promised but he didn’t really need Frank to tell him what he already knew.
“Will you stay?” he asked, trying to hide the desperation in his voice.
“I’m not going anywhere Eddie.”
“That’s good because there’s something I need to tell you…”