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1.
Fyodor didn’t hate his job, in fact, he would go so far as to say it was bearable, this didn’t mean he didn’t have to forcefully drag himself out of the house each morning with the promise of a coffee from the café below his office. No, the job wasn’t the issue, the location was a plus but his colleagues, that was the problem.
He was reminded of this when Dazai had the nerve to try to talk to him while he was finishing paperwork that was at least 3 weeks overdue, all because he decided to cut the building's internet. They’d gone to law school together, Dazai dropped out in his third year saying it wasn’t the route for him before disappearing off the face of the earth for 2 years without a word, but last spring showed up at the café downstairs looking for a job. Despite this, he spent most of his time pestering others around the building including but not limited to Fyodor, Sigma, and the ginger who worked in the offices above them doing what exactly? no one could figure it out.
“Don’t you get lonely? I mean by the state of you I’m guessing you don’t get out much” Dazai asked
“I’m guessing you don’t have enough to make rent with how poorly you do at your job,” the other retorted tiredly,
“you’re avoiding the question~” he sang.
“No, I don’t get lonely, and I find I get just the right amount of social interaction, thank you very much” he was getting irritated now,
“I strongly doubt that- you never come drinking with us- in fact, I don’t think I’ve seen you leave or enter the office it's as if you sleep at your desk, I mean you certainly seem like-” Dasai started before being abruptly cut off
“One more thing and you’ll be the next person I prosecute on trial; I have a pretty good idea of what you did on that 2-year hiatus” Fyodor sighed it was a last resort to get Dazai off his back, but never failed to do the trick.
“Okay then, not in the joking mood” slightly more nervous than before (he must of done some pretty bad stuff for him to give up that quickly) “but seriously we need to find you someone or you’ll be alone forever,”
“yeah, yeah Sigma’s round the back as per usual” please leave me alone before I commit a homicide he thought to himself
“You read my mind” Dasai spoke as Fyodor gave a small sigh of relief,
“he’s going to quit one day if you don’t cause him to go into cardiac arrest with the stress you cause him,”
and with that, he was already halfway out the door, maybe if he wasn’t in such a hurry to be screamed at (he swore he must have a masochist streak) he would have noticed the small smirk that Fyodor wore.
------
2.
Sigma was back in the office after a long weekend sanctioned by Fyodor to make up for Dazai’s antics (the anxiety that was caused in one afternoon would give him grey hairs and he already got enough stares for purple and white.)
As usual, Fyodor was hunched over his computer with a separate laptop- and a pair of headphones – it must be a bad day.
“you want a tea from downstairs?” sigma asked it like approaching a feral cat: tentatively, he did not want to be shouted at 9am on a Monday. The face that looked up at him was even more weary than usual,
“Sorry, what was that?” he replied pulling the headphones down, throat scratchy and dry.
“I was going to offer a tea, but I feel like a coffee might be better, did you not sleep at all over the weekend?”
“I guess you could say that” he yawned stretching as his shirt slipped to reveal something that sigma could only describe as suspicious,
With this observation he quickly scurried away unsure of what to do with this knowledge, taking about half an hour to get the coffee he didn’t even want that much before but needed now more than ever.
It was safe to say the rest of the day spent in silence.
----
3.
A lunch break was something Fyodor never usually took so it was a surprise to both himself and the café staff when he was sitting in a window seat with a small box in front of him staring blankly out the window the serenity of the situation was not long lasted for Dazai had his heart set on making that unachievable for more than a few minutes
“Oooh if Fyodor is eating it then it must be good,” wandering over to the table where he sat despite being on the cashier,
“what kind of logic is that?” it was the newish employee Atsushi, Dazai had taken it upon himself to show him the ropes, and left him to figure it out for himself.
“Just a hunch, he wouldn’t even touch something that had less than a 3 food hygiene rating leading to him having to cook a lot in college”
“I don’t think you should harass our customers” Atsushi suggested as Dasai tried to open the box, however Fyodor still couldn’t care any less and continued to stare blankly into the street.
"But he's not just a customer he's an old friend" Dazai whined still struggling with the lid of the box.
This seemed to catch his attention
“We are not friends,” Fyodor spoke eyes narrowing in the reflection on the window
“well would 'non-friends' share food?” he argued finally opening the tub
“So was your hunch right?” Atsushi asked curiously peering over at the contents
“The face he's pulling should tell you that,“ it was Akutagawa from that business upstairs who got some sort of kick out of being a dick to customer service workers, in particular Atsushi.
“Is this even classed as food?” Dazai asked pulling a soggy piece of bread with a mysterious grey filling and holding it far away from his face, it smelled weirdly like either egg or fish or a combination of both.
“Unfortunately, yes and I wasn’t planning on eating it either” Fyodor sighed finally turning his face to meet the others.
“shoot, you ordered a muffin right?” Atsushi asked,
The other nodded tiredly in reply.
“Get better at your job,” Akutagawa interrupted glaring at the other.
“you can shut up, no one even knows what your job is,” Atsushi replied rolling his eyes as the two continued bickering all the way up to the counter.
“Who even made this?” Dazai questioned something a bit more troublesome than curiosity shining in his eyes.
Sigma, who had just sat himself down opposite suddenly decide to join the conversation muttering only loud enough for himself and Fyodor to hear
“Probably the same person who left those marks on his neck”
for the first time in that conversation, Fyodor shot up purple eyes sharp and calculating “care to repeat that?”
Sigma did not repeat that.
---
4.
It was Wednesday night and Dazai was on the shift beforehand meaning there was twice as much for Atsushi to clean before closing, it wasn’t that he hated the closing shift it was Akutagawa who always waited until the last moment to order a coffee despite it being 8.20 at night and that Atsushi had already cleaned the machine
“would you hurry up and order already?”
“Do you have somewhere to be?” Akutagawa was smirking at his sad lonely life
“well you don’t either you do this every time I'm on the closing shift, you're just as lonely as I am” Atsushi spat with a bit more malice than intended and an awkward silence fell “Coffee?”
"No"
“good I just cleaned the machine” that was his mistake
I’ll take one then" Deciding to make his life to make his life just that bit harder
“petty, wow-“
Loud noise cut off Atsushi's response
"What the hell was that?"
"Why would I know?"
"I'll be complaining about this you know, poor service and all,"
"That was you who left that review!"
"Well-" Akutagawa said before being interrupted
“I said I'm coming you idiot,”
“No way,” a lively voice trilled “I waited half an hour when you said 5 minutes I can't have you working yourself to death now.”
"You would have killed me with your cooking,"
It was Fyodor's voice, and someone else's he didn’t recognise
There was a sudden undignified squawk of protest before both Akutagawa and Atsushi stood eyes wide open at the sight they saw next: it was Fyodor being carried like a sack of potatoes out the door by a tall blond man as they passed the shop window the worst happened eye contact was made, and the look Atsushi got well, he wouldn’t be speaking of this under torturer as whatever Fyodor would do In return would be ten times worse.
The two looked back at each other unsure what to do with this newfound information
"I can't lock up before you leave"
Akutagawa came back to reality
"I still need my coffee. Also are you going to just ignore that?"
"Yes, and if you value your life you should do the same."
--
5.
The café was just opening and a staff meeting more like Rampo complaining about everything that has upset him, it was incredibly tedious but Kunikida was sure to make sure everyone attended.
"-and then Poe couldn’t get tickets to the play he wanted to see, so he was-"
"What play?" – Fyodor was standing eerily in the hallway with a look that said he was planning something.
"Why does it matter it's been sold out for a week?"
"I could get you some... if you wanted"
"Why did you say it like you're getting something illegal, actually how are you getting those tickets exactly?" Dazai inquired,
"I have my ways"- he smirked, knowing Fyodor that could be anything from blackmail to torture or simply asking nicely.
--
+1
After the show which was surprisingly entertaining, Fyodor went quite quickly round the back in hurry as discreetly as possible well, that’s why they all followed,
They found the main actor standing by the fire exit under a lamppost, with Fyodor walking quickly towards him,
“looks like he's waiting for someone, I don’t think you can harass actors Fyodor, hey wait!” but he was paying no attention to Sigma's words.
The blond man looked up at the shout and surprisingly, ran up and enveloped the shorter in a hug
“Fedya how was I?” he asked almost suffocating Fyodor
“Perfect, as always not a single mistake” untangling himself from the other’s grasp
“you’re making me blush~” waving it off as if it was nothing, turning away embarrassed,
“A compliment from Fyodor is pretty rare, care to introduce us?” Sigma asked still traces of worry in his expression.
“Of course, I have been rude I am Nikolai Gogol actor extraordinaire, and you must be the friends who wanted tickets,” he spoke full of energy despite just being on stage, hands moving animatedly
“they’re not frie-“
“why yes Dazai Osamu pleasure to meet you” he cut in “but I do have one burning question, care to guess what it is?”
“I do love a quiz,” Nikolai replied with almost childish excitement,
“That’s an understatement,” Fyodor muttered but with no real bite
“Fire away,”
“How does someone like you get to know someone like…” gesturing to the whole of Fyodor “that”
The smile dropped slightly “Did he really not speak of me at all?”
The others shook their heads as Fyodor looked at the cracks in the pavement
"Well, we have known each other since school so about 8 years but we’ve only been dating the past 4."
“Why didn’t you tell us you were dating someone? Or invite him on our nights out?" Sigma asked
“I am a private person." after a small pause "I don’t like sharing my stuff with strangers”
“But we’re not strangers were friends~” Dazai taunted looping his arm around the other's shoulders only to be quite violently shoved away
“Okay but how didn’t we find out, you guys aren’t necessarily the subtlest,” Sigma continued
"I’ve been away in Italy and Greece studying drama, I got back last Saturday to prepare for the show we hadn’t seen each other properly in 3 1/2 years we still called but time zones and all that, now look at that I’m rambling again,"
“You know what we’re going drinking after this, and I’d love to know all about Fyodor’s school days-” Dazai started,
“And I’d be delighted to entertain you all with them” Nikolai finished.
Fyodor looked less than happy about this, but his face relaxed ever so slightly when a hand fell to his shoulder, looking up at its owner with something that could only be described as fondness.
It’s strange pair Sigma thought, but he couldn't see Fyodor with anyone else.