Chapter Text
The sun was casting its last rays through the windows of the science lab at Karasuno High, the rows of desks empty, the room devoid of life. Well, almost. A shock of spiked-up black hair peeked out from behind a lab bench, accompanied by a reflective bald head with two grey eyebrows raised just above the black surface. The only audible sound was the shuffle of uniform pants on linoleum and the occasional angry mutter when Noya head-butted Tanaka in the rear as the two mischief-makers crawled to the supply room. Now, under normal circumstances, the supply room would (rightfully so) be locked to prevent aforementioned mischief-makers from doing what they do best, but on this Friday, the key to the room had mysteriously disappeared. The chemistry teacher had thought little of it, and in a rush to catch his train home for dinner, left without locating the key. He would regret this decision immensely in the not-too-distant future.
The well-worn key slipped easily into the lock, granting access to a whole host of compounds that could be dangerous in the wrong hands. Well, all four of the wrong hands were grabbing the bottles, speed-reading the labels of the clear containers before moving onto the brown ones.
“Bro, what are we looking for?” Noya whispered, a tone louder than his normal speaking voice, but more gravelly.
“Here’s the list!” Tanaka slipped the sheet to his partner in crime conspiratorially, despite the fact that nobody could see or hear them.
“The internet knows everything. It just knows.”
“Right?!”
Noya’s head bobbed up and down as he haphazardly flitted his hands from shelf to shelf, looking for the ingredients necessary to concoct a potion that would change his and Tanaka’s lives forever. Being sixteen-year-old boys, neither had really thought their plan through in detail. They had spent a scant afternoon searching Google for love potions, and in a giddy rush, had selected the first one - one that was now printed on the paper crumpled in Noya’s sweaty hand. Chemistry was simple, they thought, despite both having failing grades in the subject, and they could easily brew up a batch of foolproof love serum and give it to the poor object of their affections. Kiyoko had managed to keep the two charming weirdos at bay for two years, but it seemed like they were finally about to succeed in their efforts. If only they could figure out what dihydrogen monoxide was.
“Ryuu!”
“Yeah, bro?”
“Did you get the herbs on the list?”
“Yeah!” They jumped in the small storage room, high-fiving in the air with an echoing smack. Cradling numerous small bottles, vials and flasks in their twitchy arms, the two made their way over to the nearest lab bench, deposited their respective chemicals and grinned from ear to ear. While they were ‘carefully’ ‘measuring’ out the required amounts for their completely innocent plan, dark clouds had begun to roll in and the room grew darker by the minute. Noya, cackling madly over an Erlenmeyer flask, popped his head up and looked out the window adjacent to him.
“I’m gonna go turn on the lights! It got all creepy and dark in here!”
“Nee-san said it was going to be sunny today! I wore my best shorts under my uniform and everything…” Tanaka trailed off, disappointed that he would be deprived of looking fabulous after school. Noya flipped on the back row of lights, illuminating the rows of discarded measuring equipment and a single 1-liter beaker filled with equal parts of acids and bases. Again, being none-too-skilled in chemistry, the duo kept unwittingly making water. Saltwater. By some miracle, they managed to hook up a distillation apparatus and set the mixture boiling for the time specified on their magical recipe. At this point, most humans would have noticed that they were effectively boiling water, but the fancy chemical names had convinced Noya and Tanaka that they were working magic. Love magic.
“We’re chemistry geniuses!” exclaimed Noya, clenching his fists in victory in front of the characters on his shirt, which read “Honour Among Thieves.” He had worn it under his uniform expressly for this occasion, suspecting that Tanaka may have needed some motivation to go steal from the faculty. The shirt actually had motivated the taller boy, and here they were, about to successfully make the world’s most complicated cup of salty chamomile (and oregano?) tea. Once they had distilled the saltwater into just regular water, as the recipe stated, they dumped their herbs in and stirred, letting their potion steep. Thunder rumbled in the distance and the lights flickered ominously.
“We’re mad scientists, bro! Look at the potion! It’s totally changing colours!” Tanaka pressed his face against the large beaker, admiring it.
“Whoooooooooaaaaaaa.” Noya joined him, guffawing at the sight of Tanaka’s distorted face in the glass. “Your eyes are huge! Ha!”
“Yours too!” They giggled madly.
They were meant to steep their ‘potion’ for fifteen minutes, and given the sheer amount of energy contained in their bodies, neither could sit still. Noya pulled out a volleyball while glassware and half-open bottles of various chemicals surrounded him, and actually considered this a passable idea. Lightning flashed close to the building, followed momentarily by a sharp clap of thunder. Neither Noya nor Tanaka flinched; they were so fired up about their plan that nothing could faze them.
“Ryuu! Let’s play while we wait!”
“You’re a genius, Yuu!” A genius libero he was, but on a scale of one to horrible ideas, this stunt was definitely in the 95th percentile of dumb. The two managed to keep the ball in play and in control for nearly the whole time they were waiting. It was when the timer on Tanaka’s phone blared obnoxiously that he contacted the ball unevenly, sending in the direction of the assorted chemicals and their prized concoction. The ball tipped over the large beaker in what appeared to be slow motion, knocking over a bottle of something colourful along with it. Noya and Tanaka, horror etched into their features, lunged forward to catch the beaker before it spilled all of their potion across the shiny surface of the bench. Tanaka righted the container after approximately a third had poured out and mixed with the contents of one unlabeled bottle. The spilled portion turned pink briefly, then faded to clear once more.
“Yuu! What are we going to do? We’re going to waste this!”
“No, we will not, Ryuu! We have survived greater trials in our lives!” Noya contemplated the large puddle spreading across the table, wrapping itself around the edges of the metal sink. “We can scoop it up!” Tanaka gawked at Noya, admiration radiating from his eyes. Noya posed with his hands on his hips, eyes closed and lips curled into a pleased smile. Lightning flashed just outside of the window, startling the two with its proximity, and the lights in the room flickered while thunder echoed painfully in their ears. Tanaka pulled Noya’s attention to the puddle, which had glowed faintly during the lightning strike.
“Waaaaaahhhhh, THIS IS GOING TO BE THE BEST!” Pipetting the spilled liquid back into the bigger container, Noya and Tanaka fantasized about their immediate future of love.
The lab ‘clean,’ and love potion safely stored in a sealed water bottle, the dynamic duo nearly skipped off campus and on the way to their respective homes. Noya took the potion home with him for safekeeping, and all weekend, the two texted back and forth about phase two of Operation Rolling Thunder of Love.
At Monday’s night practice, it was all the two could do to not burst at the seams from giddiness. Their goddess, Kiyoko, was looking over the previous week’s serving statistics on the sideline, a water bottle sitting unattended at her feet. For a pair as invested in a plan as this, it was surprising to note that they didn’t recognize that the water bottle at her feet was not, in fact, hers. It belonged to a certain scowling setter who was, at that moment, holding their decoy up by his shirt and yelling insults into his face. Noya and Tanaka put a few drops of their potion in that very same water bottle in between drills, and crept away, faces nearly split by grins.
“Bro!”
“Brooooooooo.”
“Now we wait!” Noya’s voice rose an octave from sheer delight, and he high-fived Tanaka before running onto the court for a receiving drill. Suga side-eyed the duo, suspicious of their weirder than normal behavior, and nudged Daichi.
“Are they a little more hyper than usual today? They seem like they’ve got some mischief planned, Daichi.” Suga, hands on his hips, turned towards the captain.
“Aren’t they always planning mischief?” Daichi arched an eyebrow and crossed his arms.
“Well, yes, but they were crawling around behind the bench during the last water break, humming the Mission Impossible theme.”
“Huh. That is weird. I don’t know what to tell you, Suga, aside from it’s your turn to receive!” Daichi clapped him on the back, letting his hand linger briefly on the sloping muscle.
“Oh! Oh, yes!” The vice captain ran onto the court to take his turn.
Hinata, ever the ball of hyperactive sunshine, skidded off the court and swept up the bottle at Kiyoko’s feet. He squirted some of the water into his mouth, anticipating sweet relief for his parched throat. Instead, he got a mouthful of something different; it wasn’t so bad that he’d spit it out, but there was a distinct flavour to it.
“DUMBASS HINATA!” Kageyama stalked over, fists clenched by his sides and scowl dark enough to engulf Hinata’s boundless joy in seconds.
“What?!” The redhead recoiled, looking around in a panic to find someone to hide behind.
“That’s my water bottle! You idiot! You’ve just contaminated it!” The dark-haired boy snatched the yellow bottle from Hinata’s smaller hands and squirted some water in his mouth.
“Then why did you just drink from it?!”
“I’M REALLY THIRSTY, DUMBASS!” None of their teammates paid the bickering any mind because this was a regular occurrence; it was only when the two were quiet did anyone feel uncomfortable. Besides, Noya and Tanaka were too busy being completely and utterly horrified that they had put their potion in the wrong bottle. The bottle from which both Hinata and Kageyama had taken a drink. Oh no, they mouthed, covering their faces with their hands in tandem. So much for a foolproof plan. Noya peeked out from behind his hand, catching Suga and Daichi’s trouble-spotting gazes. He quickly dropped his palms to his sides, chuckling weakly as their combined stare weighed on his small frame. He nudged Tanaka to draw attention to the fact that they may not have been as stealthy as they had previously thought. Hinata chose that moment to hiccup loudly, distracting the captain and vice captain from their scrutiny. Kageyama hiccupped a moment later. The setter stared at the tiny redhead, and watched his pupils blow wide before returning to normal. Hinata shook his head like a small puppy.
“What was in this water, Kageyama? My head feels all weird.”
“Nothing! It was just water! And I drank from it too, and I feel fi-“ Kageyama paused mid-sentence, his face screwed up in confusion. “-ne.” The pair stared at one another intently, the silence drawing the attention of the entire team. Tsukishima shook his head, taking another swig from his bottle before walking back towards the net, followed closely by a scurrying Yamaguchi. Silence descended on the gym and Coach Ukai stared at his team, itching to pull out a cigarette to calm himself. What were these boys up to?
“Serving drills! Go!” His voice snapped Kageyama and Hinata out of their trance, and that sent a chain reaction rippling through the rest of the team. Practice started back up without any trouble, and Noya and Tanaka were sure they were out of the woods. Sure, their potion had failed, but at least they hadn’t accidentally made two of their key players fall in love with each other.
Things began to get weird when Coach called for a scrimmage. Naturally, Hinata and Kageyama were on the same side, so some weirdness was to be expected. Not this amount, though. Hinata had mis-hit a ball, and true to form, Kageyama tensed up, ready to unleash any rage he happened to have built up since his last eruption. That reaction was normal, however, the words that flew out of his mouth were most definitely not.
“HINATA! I WANT TO TOUCH YOUR HAIR, DUMBASS!” Kageyama froze as soon as the words had tumbled out of his mouth, blue eyes snapping open in shock. His hair was still swaying from the exertion of yelling, but everything around him had become very, very still. Hinata’s face bloomed a bright red, feet rooted to the spot, eyes making contact with anything but Kageyama. In the background, Noya’s eyes were open so wide that he was afraid he’d be collecting his eyeballs from the floor, and Tanaka had not breathed in over thirty seconds. Ennoshita looked at Yamaguchi, who shrugged and looked over at his best friend. Tsukishima looked disgusted, as per usual. Suga and Daichi had both cocked their heads in confusion, exchanging a puzzled look. Asahi had gone into shock. Takeda’s eyes were wide as saucers, Kiyoko’s lips were parted slightly in surprise, and Coach Ukai could have used some help in reclaiming his jaw from the floor. It was the loud caw of a crow outside that broke the tense silence. Hinata picked up the long-forgotten volleyball and rolled it to Yamaguchi on the opposite side of the net.
“Your serve?” He chuckled weakly, worrying his bottom lip. Kageyama looked like he was ready for the ground to swallow him whole. Daichi remembered his duty as captain and called out ‘serve!’ letting Yamaguchi know he was to serve immediately. He did as he was told, and for several rallies, everything was back to normal, Kageyama’s bizarre outburst forgotten. It wasn’t until Hinata made eye contact with his setter after a successful freak quick that the weird returned, full-force.
“That was awesome, Kageyama! It went all GWAH and PAH and the set was almost as pretty as your eyes!” The redhead clapped both his hands over his mouth, looking up at Kageyama. He braced himself for the inevitable head-grab, but none came. Suga nearly broke his neck snapping his head in the direction of his two kouhai. Tanaka started choking on his tongue and Noya violently slapped him on the back to get him back to his senses.
“Did your brain-to-mouth filter finally break completely? Ugh.” Tsukishima drawled from the back of the court, adjusting his glasses. The team erupted in laughter, joined awkwardly by Kageyama and Hinata who were now pointedly avoiding each other’s gaze. Coach Ukai rested his weight on one hip and looked around the gym for clues that would convince him he was actually asleep and dreaming about this bizarre day. The rest of the scrimmage was sloppy at best because the teenagers’ hormones had decided to take over.
The group of sweaty, tired boys congregated in the clubroom to change after practice, chatting noisily. Noya and Hinata were jumping and yelling about the upcoming Spring Highs, the second-years were laughing about something on Tanaka’s phone, Suga and Daichi were patting an awkward Asahi on the back, Tsukishima and Yamaguchi were judging, and Kageyama stood stock-still at his locker, eyes narrowed. His hand had been hovering over the locker door for nearly five minutes as he contemplated Hinata’s and his outbursts at practice. What had possessed him to say something like that in public when he was intending on saying something completely different? He shrugged, finally peeling off his practice jersey. Out of the corner of his eye, Kageyama caught Hinata staring at him with his eyebrows drawn. The stupid decoy wasn’t actually trying to make eye contact, though; he was unabashedly staring at Tobio’s abs. Kageyama quickly threw on a shirt, looking away from his teammate. Noya caught the exchange, hoping nobody else had, because he suspected that Tanaka’s and his internet potion had actually worked.
“Ryuu! Come here! We have important business to discuss!” The libero gesticulated wildly to his friend. Tanaka made his way over to the corner of the room, bending down so his ear was level with Noya’s mouth. “I think we should give the potion to Daichi and Suga next practice.” Tanaka looked aghast.
“Noya-san, they’ll kill us!”
“Not if they don’t know about it!”
“But why them?”
“Because they’re our captains, duh.”
“Brooooo.”
“But we should put more in.”
“Are you sure?”
“We have plenty, don’t we?” Tanaka nodded in the affirmative, putting his fist out towards Noya. The shorter boy bumped their fists together, signaling the end of their meeting with a comical wink. Behind them, all they could hear was:
“DUMBASS, STOP STARING. I LIKE IT!”
“NOT MY FAULT YOU HAVE SUCH A DEFINED BODY, STUPID KAGEYAMA. PUT YOUR PANTS BACK ON, BUT DON’T!” Noya snorted into his palm, elbowing Tanaka in the ribs.
“Just imagine Suga-san yelling things like that! Wait, what if we give it to everyone?” Tanaka whispered loudly, barely suppressing a guffaw.
“YES! It is our duty to make sure we have fun at volleyball. This is fun, right?”
“YESSSS!”
Little did the rest of the team know what was in store for their next practice.