Work Text:
"That's the music you listen to? Geez, man", Eddie laughed as he rifled through his cassette collection in the glove compartment while Steve was driving them to Mike's for a D&D game night.
Steve would've normally laughed with him, but right now all he could manage was a weak grin, obviously embarrassed. He was panicking inside.
Eddie was... Eddie was cool, okay? Like, the true kind of cool anyway. Not the cookie-cutter cool that you often found in high-school, the one people thought of when they met Steve. No, Eddie was the kind of cool Steve found most admirable.
Once upon a time he would've scoffed and turned away, adhering to the collective thought that Eddie "the freak" Munson? Cool? No way.
A few months ago he would've thought of it differently as well. He would've been jealous. Hell, he had been jealous. The way Dustin had spoken about him had ignited his insides in the most ugly way, and he had been incredibly bitter at first.
Then he had finally met the guy in person and, well, he could see what everyone was talking about. Eddie Munson was not what Steve had been expecting; he was incredibly dramatic, sure, but in a weirdly charming way. He was also so down to earth, open and welcoming, and didn't care what anyone said. It seemed like he embraced himself, his weirdness.
Steve wasn't sure if he could ever be like that. He could freely admit that he wasn't the most functional adult, or that yes, he was friends with a bunch of kids and regularly - sort of - babysitted them, instead of actually getting a life and a proper job, maybe apply for college.
This admission would never be without at least an ounce of shame; as much as he loved Dustin - who he saw as a little brother - and his ragtag group of friends, his life definitely hadn't turned out the way he had wanted it to. Or maybe that was his parents speaking? In any case, there was a part of him that hated himself, for various reasons.
One of them was currently in Eddie's hands.
"Queen? Of course you listen to Queen", Eddie said, a twinkle in his eyes.
He meant it as a joke, of course he did. If Eddie was anything, it wasn't malicious. Actually, Steve thought, he might be the least violent and mean person he knew.
But the statement made him think of his parents, their scrutiny, and suddenly he snapped.
"It's okay to listen to Queen", he said, a bit too harshly.
He snatched the cassette out of Eddie's hands and threw it back into the glove compartment, slamming it shut.
Eddie looked like a deer caught in headlights, but didn't seem mad at him.
Tears pricked at the corner of Steve's eyes. Today was a bad day.
He tried to keep calm while driving down the street to the Wheeler's residence, but it was still a couple of minutes until they'd arrive, and the silence was stifling.
"I didn't mean it in a bad way," Eddie finally decided to say.
He sounded cautious, almost, and Steve felt even worse listening to his hesitant voice.
"I know", he mumbled.
He felt like a prick. Maybe he was one. Maybe he never stopped being one in the first place. Thinking about it was giving him a headache.
Ever since they made Vecna go away, Steve's nightmares had been acting up again. He had barely been sleeping lately and was always on guard nowadays.
His paranoia had waned a couple of months after Billy's death and El destroying the Mind Flayer, but came back full force with Vecna, and even now that everything was fine again, he still felt the fear coursing through him whenever there was something small setting him off. He even made a new bat for himself. "For emergencies", he always told himself when he checked if it was still under his bed.
Steve's fingers were drumming restlessly on the steering wheel, and now he really felt like crying.
He didn't even know why all of this was so upsetting to him! Robin was a lesbian and he loved her to bits; she was his best friend for fuck's sake! But him liking guys? Nope, unacceptable.
Maybe it was the reaction of Dustin and the others that scared him? The fear of them all suddenly treating him differently.
Eventually, at Eddie's imploring and concerned look, he huffed.
"My parents fucking hate Queen."
He sent Eddie a nervous look, but he only seemed more concerned, his hands fiddling with his sleeves, almost like he was trying to keep himself from grabbing something.
"They, um", he sniffed, trying to stall a little, "they said it was for queers, fags, y'know."
Now Steve was actively avoiding Eddie's gaze. His fingers had long since stilled and were gripping the steering wheel tightly, his knuckles a ghastly white.
Maybe he should stop driving, because his vision started to blur.
"Doesn't help that I am one."
"Steve, please pull over. "
That was it. Eddie would get out now and would never talk to him again. He'd honestly expected it, but it still came like a blow to his chest.
Steve drove towards the sidewalk of a lowly populated area, still in the more run-down sub-urban part of town. It was afternoon, but there were no people outside. He pulled up next to it, turning off the motor entirely.
Steve waited for Eddie to get out of the car, but instead two warm hands suddenly framed his face and then he was staring at Eddie's face.
He held a serious, almost solemn expression, and his eyes seemed a bit sadder than they were before.
"Listen Stevie, I don't care, okay?" he said.
"You're not a— you're not a fag", he spit out. "God, I hate that word. You're you and I lo— I like you just the way you are."
His hands were still pressed against his cheeks, and Steve stayed quiet, tears finally spilling over and sliding down his face and dripping down on the centre console between them.
He tried to suppress a sob, but it tore out of him like a wild animal, and he promptly sagged against the other man, his forehead pressed against his shoulder and Steve's hands gripping the sides of Eddie's leather jacket.
Eddie just dropped his chin on Steve's head, his hands sliding into his hair and his arms encircling him in a way that seemed to shield Steve from the world.
"It's okay, I've got you", he mumbled into Steve's hair while he was crying into his shirt.
"You know, I'm not exactly straight either", he teased softly after Steve calmed down a fraction, gripping his neck lightly while drawing relaxing circles with his thumb. Steve let out a wet laugh and hugged the man tighter, suddenly overwhelmed by a sense of immense gratitude and love.
He's had a crush on Eddie for months now, but this wasn't anything he'd imagined ever happening to him.
Eddie pressed a kiss to Steve's temple and then put some distance between them by gripping his shoulders.
"I, uh, like you. A lot", he admitted, his brown eyes flitting over Steve's face and a shy smile on his lips.
"Can I –"
"Yes", Steve breathed before the other could even finish, and their lips brushed against each other for a moment, before Eddie pressed against Steve's more passionately, and Steve gave in with a quiet sigh.
Eddie mouthed his way towards Steve's cheeks lightly, kissing the tears away and making the latter's eyelashes flutter, before moving back to his lips, capturing them with what Steve could only describe as searing. He moaned, and Eddie immediately took the opportunity to lick into his mouth, tasting like salt and and strawberries, and for a moment it was pure bliss.
They broke apart a few seconds later, breathing laboriously.
Eddie's gaze lasted heavily on Steve's cherry red lips, his own pretty swollen as well. He then started to grin, his thumbs caressing Steve's cheekbones almost reverentially.
"I wanted to do this with you almost immediately after I've met you."
Steve scoffed. "The first time you met me you were holding a piece of glass against my throat."
"Touché."
"Come on, let's listen to some Queen. What's your favourite song?"
"... Good Old-Fashioned Lover Boy —— stop laughing, oh my god!"