Chapter Text
The D+ on his final paper must have been written in watercolor ink, because Eddie couldn’t see any other reason why the letter was smudged with wet splotches. His gut felt hollow as he skimmed over the note that was left my Mrs. O’Donnell:
Lacks structure and is not polished enough for a final paper.
She wasn’t wrong, it was his rough draft that he’d turned in. He hadn’t meant to forget about it, hadn’t meant to lose himself so much in any distraction he could find from the memories of the last few months. It wasn’t until they’d been asked to turn in their final papers on the day it was due that Eddie had been blindsided with the realization that he’d never even worked on it. All he had in his bag was the original draft that he’d thrown together during the end of class when she’d given the initial assignment. He didn’t even remember what he’d written about until he’d skimmed his own paper while handing it over to Mrs. O’Donnell.
Despite this, Eddie couldn’t help the burning in his eyes and throat, and the way his hands shook as he slowly clenched his fingers around the paper. She knew this was his last chance to graduate. All she’d needed to do was to bump him up to a C and she’d never have to see him again. Eddie swallowed hard against the lump in his throat, trying to stabilize his breathing before he lost himself in the swell of despair that was threatening to suffocate him. He folded the paper, turning to his backpack and shoving it inside the first open pocket he could find. He cleared his throat, gave a sniff and tried to rub at his eyes and nose as if he was being bothered by allergies and not his own failures.
Feeling sick to his stomach, Eddie glanced around the room as subtly as he could. There were too many eyes on him, too many classmates trying to discern whether or not Eddie had colossally ruined his own future yet again. He hated it, hated the weight of their stares and the fact that he was an adult trapped in a room full of teenagers. He hated the sight of Mrs. O'Donnell's condescending stare over her glasses anytime she read his papers. If it wasn’t his grammatical errors, it was the doodles in the margins that usually set her off. So many papers had come back with poor grades before he had finally addressed the cause with her, unable to figure out what part of each assignment he wasn’t grasping. The memory of how smug she had seemed when she told him that his ‘art projects’ were the direct cause of his failing grade for the last few months, it was enough to snap a long, thin wire of patience that had been stretching tighter and tighter somewhere inside of Eddie.
He grabbed his backpack, flinging it over his shoulder as he stood. Mrs. O’Donnell’s gaze snapped to him, her mouth dropping open to exclaim, “Mr. Munson!” as Eddie headed for the classroom door. He didn’t turn, but did grace her with his extended middle finger and retreating back before he was gone and making a beeline for the parking lot. His heart was thundering in his ears and his breath felt shallow and hot. Eddie could hear the sound of his teeth grinding, but he couldn’t bring himself to unclench them yet. There was a white-hot burn of humiliation inside of him that was fighting the rage and heartache that had been slowly increasing with each step. He caught the eye of Lucas, who seemed to be passing by on a bathroom break, and ducked his head down until he knew his hair was hiding any expression. Lucas called out to him but Eddie only raised his hand in a wave and continued walking.
He didn’t stop until he reached the parking lot, until he’d gotten in his van and tossed his backpack into the passenger seat. It was then that it set in, and Eddie’s hands began to shake in earnest. He shoved the keys into the ignition until Ozzy’s voice came blaring through the speakers. Eddie clutched the steering wheel, every inch of his skin feeling like it was on fire and he took a minute to let the music wash over him, forcing himself to breathe slowly, deeply.
Hands feeling steadier, Eddie pulled out of the school. He didn’t really think much about where he was going, not until he was pulling into the parking lot of Family Video and looking through glass windows to where Steve and Robin were talking (or bickering?) and stocking shelves. It wasn’t long before the deafening rattle of his music drew the attention of the store's inhabitants and both Steve and Robin stopped to look out the window. He made eye contact with Steve first, but the expression of recognition was almost immediate–like Steve could see directly into his soul and he knew Eddie had failed. Eddie tore his eyes away, instead looking to Robin, who was clearly judging him for the volume of his music more than wondering why he would be there in the middle of the school day. He turned the radio down, but didn’t get out right away.
When his hesitation was bordering on awkward, Eddie turned the van off and headed into the store. He didn’t have much of a plan, but couldn’t help but give them both an awkward smile and blurted, “I don’t suppose you need to have a high school diploma to work here, do you?”
“Oh, Eddie ,” Robin said, and he only bristled for a moment before she was throwing her arms around him in a hug. He hovered his hands awkwardly for a moment before they settled on her back and the situation hit him like a truck.
“S’such bullshit,” he gritted out through his teeth, biting back a hundred thousand other things he wanted to say. Steve approached, resting his hand against Eddie’s back to give it a comforting pat.
“I know, man. Hey– why don’t you get your GED instead?”
Eddie couldn’t help the bitter sounding laugh that escaped him as he pulled away from Robin. “Those things cost money, Harrington.”
Steve seemed to think about it for only a half second before he made a dismissive nod, “fair point… lucky for you, there is no requirement for a diploma to work here– and,” Steve went back to the counter, rummaging around until he pulled out a uniform vest and tossed it at Eddie, “we happen to be hiring.”
Eddie caught the vest, looking down at it and then up at Robin. She smiled, giving him a cheery thumbs up. He felt a swell of emotion rising up inside of him and swallowed it back, giving them both an awkward smile and holding up the vest. “I’ve been known to rock a vest or two,” he joked, and then cleared his throat and leveled Steve with a serious look. “Thank you, you don’t have to do this--”
“Yeah yeah,” Steve waved his hand, making the same face he always did when brushing off someone’s comment. “Us babysitters need to stick together.” Steve turned back to the counter, pulling up the schedule and gesturing for Eddie to come over.
“We’ve been looking for someone to work third shift on Fridays through Mondays. Does that work for you?”
“Uh, yeah,” Eddie came closer, peering over Steve’s shoulder at the schedule. It looked like there was only two other employees that worked, which would explain the desire to hire more staff before summer break. “I don’t have anything else going on, it’s not like I’m in school,” he joked dryly. He was close enough behind Steve that he felt the heat of Steve’s back radiating against his front. Steve wrote Eddie’s name on the scheduled days and then reached to a binder nearby and flipped through until he found what he was looking for.
“Fill this out,” Steve handed Eddie the job application. Eddie took it, glancing around for somewhere to fill it out. Steve handed him a pen and patted the counter. A client came in, and Robin greeted them, taking them on the opposite side of the counter. Eddie fiddled with his pen for a moment, and then slouched over the paperwork and started scribbling away.
While Eddie was writing, Steve kept himself busy by rewinding a stack of nearby tapes. There was a long silence that was only broken by Steven when Eddie was nearly done filling out the application. “So I’m not like, the smartest in the group, but I did pass high school on the first try so, you know. I think I’ve got some great insight to offer when it comes time to study for that GED.”
Eddie finished the paperwork, looking up at Steve and unable to help himself from staring as he handed the form over. Steve’s grin was awkward but endearing, and Eddie found himself wanting to appease Steve, if only to see that smile more.
“I might have to take you up on that, Harrington,” he rasped, surprised at how rough his voice sounded. He cleared his throat, breaking eye contact with Steve to straighten up and step back.
Steve’s grin was still there, looking a little more flustered and pleased, and he ran his hand through his hair before he turned to store Eddie’s paperwork with the rest of the employee’s. “See you on Friday? 3 o’clock?”
“Yeah,” Eddie said, “Friday at 3.”
—
Friday afternoon, Eddie started his shift at Family Video with Steve sitting him down at the front counter with a rewinder, a stack of VHS tapes, and a stack of GED study guides. Eddie stared at the two stacks and Steve clapped him on the back. “Got you some reading material to keep you from getting too bored while you work,” he said in a teasing voice. Eddie knew Steve was trying to get a bit of a rise out of him, but he was genuinely taken aback to find that Steve had gone out of his way to acquire the study material for Eddie.
“Thanks man,” Eddie said, reaching out to grab a VHS tape and get started. Steve seemed a little taken aback, but didn’t let it bother him before long before he decided an easier way to get a reaction was to give Eddie’s hair a rough brotherly ruffle before walking away to avoid being swatted at by the book Eddie had just grabbed.
The pattern became apparent, Eddie’s main purpose was to study, rewind tapes, and redirect customers and their questions while Steve tried to keep the store in order between waves of teenagers renting and returning. By Sunday, Eddie was starting to feel a little more confident in his future, given that a majority of the study material implied that the exams were going to be a lot more up his alley.
“I was never a homework guy,” Eddie found himself saying as Steve was locking up that sunday. The parking lot was dark and empty except for their two vehicles. Steve glanced up at him to let Eddie know he was engaged in the conversation. “I have things to do when I get home. It’s not like I don’t know the stuff,”
“Yeah? Feeling pretty good about this GED stuff?” Steve asked as they crossed the parking lot and hovered in the space between Steve’s car and Eddie’s van.
“Yeah! Kind of,” Eddie shoved his hands into the pockets of his jacket and shrugged, “It’s just a bunch of what I’ve spent the last three years having crammed repeatedly into my head against my will, so, you know…. Something’s gotta stick, right?”
Steve laughed, “fair point,” he walked around his car, opening the driver’s side. “See you next friday?”
“Yeah… see you friday.”
Friday was starting to become Eddie’s favorite day of the week. Though his days as a DM had been dialed back to Tuesdays after school, on Wednesday and Thursday afternoons he spent time practicing with his band…it was Friday and the evenings working at Family Video, watching snippets of movies, helping customers, bantering with Steve and studying between the lulls in clients that Eddie felt the most at peace.
On the days he didn’t work, Eddie felt like he spent most of his time waiting for his work days. The van was getting too hot to hang out in as summer set in, and most of his earnings from selling weed went into food and gas. Eddie hadn’t bought cigarettes in weeks because it was just another cost to add on to his already tight budget. Even if he did manage to get his GED he was still living out of his van and Eddie’s back was seriously starting to miss a normal bed.
A lack of a normal bed was taking its toll in more ways than one, especially when Eddie found himself grunting and groaning more frequently from stiffness and pain that seemed to radiate from his back and travel through his whole body. He was carrying a box of new arrivals through the store, shelving them at a snail’s pace when the wrong movement had his back tweaking just enough for him to lose his grip on the box of tapes. It hit the ground with a loud clatter as Eddie grunted and took a moment to get his breath back, trying not to let it hitch when he moved wrong and his back spasmed again. Steve’s fluffy head of hair popped up from a few aisles over and Eddie could hear him approaching.
“I’m good,” he grunted out, half holding his breath, “back’s tweaking, I just need a minute.”
“I think you’re a little young for back problems, Munson,” Steve pointed out, grabbing the box off tapes and clearly vacillating between leaving Eddie to suffer and trying to help in some way. “Do uh, you need some help?”
“I need a normal bed,” Eddie slowly stretched his body with a grumble, “sleeping in a van is what’s going to make me old, thanks,” Eddie took the tapes back from Steve, this time taking more care to use more of his legs to reach the lower shelves instead of curling his spine like a cashew. He could feel Steve’s eyes boring into the back of his head and he glanced back at him. “I’m good now,” he said, “I’m not going to fall apart.”
“It’s not that! It’s just,” Steve started trailing after Eddie, “ why exactly are you sleeping in a van?”
Eddie shot him a look as he shelved some tapes. “Didn't feel right to stay at my uncle's anymore,” he muttered, knowing there might be a little bit of force behind his movements. “All it takes is one false accusation that I’m a serial killer and the guy's house becomes every asshole's target for vandalism,” Eddie gave his head a little wobble for effect, trying to play it off like he was unbothered by it all.
“Stay at my house,” came the offer from Steve. Eddie froze, slowly looking back over his shoulder again at the other man. Steve gave some sort of vague gesture and continued, “my folks aren’t home much and we’ve got an entire guest bedroom. They weren’t here for all that serial killer drama, so it’s no biggie, yeah.”
Eddie put the last of the tapes up and started breaking down the empty box. Steve was still hovering, clearly waiting for a response. He kept adjusting the tapes so they sat neatly, trying to look busier than he really was. Eddie already felt like he was imposing more than necessary. He and Steve had been getting along even before he’d started at Family Video, but there was some quiet voice in the back of his head telling him it was only a matter of time before Steve got tired of him being around.
It was that same thought that led Eddie to shrugging off Steve’s offer. “It’s fine, man. I can take care of myself. I don’t want to ruin your reputation anymore than I already have,” Eddie turned on his heel slowly, stopping to face Steve and then hand him the broken-down box. “Once a freak, always a freak, after all.”
This wasn’t the answer Steve was looking for. He took the box with a frown, his face contorting into his classic exasperated, ‘are you an idiot?’ face that Eddie was starting to become familiar with.
“Dude, there’s literally like, no downside to this. Come on, man. You look like shit–”
“--thanks for that–”
“--yep. Anyway, you obviously need to sleep in a bed, I’ve already gotten you a job and I’m helping with the GED, aren’t I? Just let me help! You saved us more than once with Vecna, the least I can do is return the favor.”
Part of Eddie knew that Steve wasn’t trying to hold it over his head, and yet being reminded of the things that were being done for him made white hot guilt start to burn inside of him. Eddie ducked his head, because seeing Steve’s eyes bore into him was the last thing Eddie wanted at that exact moment.
He wasn’t sure if it was from the poor sleep in the van, or because Steve made him feel exposed, or if Eddie just was sick of how nice Steve was to him, but he couldn’t stop the words from flowing out of his mouth, “I don’t know what delusions you’re feeding into, but I’m not worth it, ” and Eddie was turning tail, striding across the store to the stack of returns. He could feel Steve double-stepping to keep pace with him.
“What is that supposed to mean?” Steve asked indignantly, as if Eddie had offended him personally.
Eddie turned around with the tapes in hand. He’d been so focused on avoiding Steve, he hadn’t realized how close Steve actually was until his hands were bumping into Steve’s chest. He was being crowded against the counter and Steve looked ready for an argument. Eddie was taken aback when they locked eyes, because Steve looked genuinely upset. Any negative self talk that was on Eddie’s lips died off, the door opening and a gaggle of teenagers walking in. Steve glanced up at them and shot Eddie a look that clearly said he wasn’t happy with the interruption, and then stepped away to let him pass. Eddie’s neck was hot, his skin breaking out into goosebumps as he brushed past Steve, feeling the other man’s eyes follow his very movement.
Even after the customers left, it seemed like Steve was almost standoffish. Eddie’s gut was in turmoil, twisting with anxiety, almost feeling as if he should apologize for talking poorly about himself. He kept himself busy by diving into his study guides, only looking up any time customers entered in case Steve needed help on the floor.
When closing came around, Eddie made quick work of the blinds and vacuuming the hideous patterned carpet. Steve was finishing up counting the till when he called Eddie over, face unreadable. Eddie approached, seeing that Steve held his application in hand. Eddie felt his stomach do a small flip, suddenly worried that Steve was going to fire him for acting ungrateful or something.
“We’ve got a problem here, Muson,” Steve said with a frown, holding up Eddie’s application.
“What kind of a problem?” Eddie ventured.
Steve sighed, handing the paper to Eddie and shaking his head, “well it looks like the address was left blank. We can’t just hire homeless vagrants left and right. Sorry dude, unless you can find a place to stay it looks like we can’t keep you.”
Eddie stared at Steve in disbelief, mouth falling agape. “A… are you blackmailing me into staying with you? Is that what’s happening right now?”
“ Blackmailing ?!” Steve exclaimed incredulously, placing a hand to his chest delicately as if the very thought offended him to the core. “That is so beneath me, I can’t believe you’d even accuse me of that! I, my friend, am only trying to do my job as the shift leader at Family Video.”
“Uh huh,” Eddie deadpanned.
“We are a respectable establishment, Eddie,” Steve gestured around to the aged and worn looking store as if it was a palace. “If I just so happen to have a place for you to stay, and that’s the only way you can keep your job, that isn’t blackmail, that’s just a coincidence.”
Eddie narrowed his eyes, “how long is that going to last for before your parents get sick of me?”
Steve shrugged, “depends on how long it takes them to notice you’re there,” the smile he had on was impish, and far too endearing for Eddie’s liking. He couldn’t help it, every time Steve did something so disgustingly friendly, it made Eddie’s blood boil. His kindness shouldn’t exist, he shouldn’t be so many good things. It wasn’t fair, and Eddie was torn between denying him just to be in control, and giving in because he could really use a nice bed and access to a private bathroom again.
“Fine,” Eddie finally relented. Steve seemed pleased with this, holding his hand out to shake with Eddie’s.
“Pleasure doing business with you, Munson. Let’s finish closing up and head home.” Steve gave his hand a firm shake, clapped him on the shoulder and got up to finish locking away the day’s earning’s in the safe.
“ Pleasure doing business with you, meh meh meh, ” Eddie mocked in a small voice, his lip curled as he followed after Steve. He felt bristly and overexposed, part of him uneasy that he hadn’t tried that hard to put up a fight. He was tired, constantly on the brink of a burnout that he was afraid would lead down a darker path. Eddie wondered if he had taken advantage of Steve’s helpful nature by presenting himself as something to be saved….but his rational brain knew he’d sought out Steve because he knew Steve of all people would know what to do– and he’d been right.
He followed Steve in his van, the both of them pulling into a dark driveway that led up to Steve’s family house just a couple hours before midnight. Steve showed him the guest room, the bathroom, and pointed out his and his parent’s room, and then dragged Eddie to the kitchen so they could both scrounge up something to have for dinner.
Sandwiches ended up being the way to go, Steve loading his up with anything that could be put on a sandwich, and Eddie sticking to meat, cheese and some mustard. Each bite Steve took was a disgusting mess, dripping everywhere as he made happy noises, clearly having been famished before eating.
Eddie couldn’t look away, watching condiments and tomato juice drip all over the counter. Steve’s eyes fluttered as they rolled up into his head, grunting and chewing aggressively. This was not a side of Steve Harrington that Eddie had been expecting to see, one that was comfortable enough to be a messy eater. Steve opened his eyes, catching Eddie watching him, and like that, this genuine part of Steve was gone and hidden. Steve straightened up, cleared his throat and grabbed a napkin from nearby to clean his face. He finished his mouthful, muttering sheepishly, “sorry, forgot to pack a lunch.”
Eddie hadn’t had lunch either, but he usually would skip it to save a few extra dollars. He suddenly felt his appetite come rushing back, and the sandwich in his own hands looked much tastier than it had a few moments prior when Eddie had still been lost in his own head more than anything. The first bite was like a snowball effect, and he soon found himself scarfing his sandwich down. His stomach had been tight all day, and food seemed to help ease the pain and tension as he continued to eat.
Steve grabbed them both a beer, and that’s when Eddie blurted, “honestly if you’d led with the beer instead of the blackmail, you probably could have gotten me in your bed,” he joked, not expecting Steve to nearly choke on his drink. He couldn’t help but laugh, a small thrill shooting through him that it had been a sexual innuendo that had gotten a reaction.
Steve wiped foamy beer from his lips and nose, huffing a laugh out, “good to know,” and taking a proper sip while shaking his head with a smile. He turned to Eddie, eyes lingering for a long moment before he said in a voice so soft that Eddie almost thought he’d hallucinated.
“You’re not a burden, you know.”
Eddie stared into the opening of his beer, watching small bubbles pop and foam on the lip of it. He had nothing to say, he didn’t want to argue, but it felt wrong to accept Steve’s words.
“Dude, I’m serious. You got dealt some shitty cards, all right. School sucks, it’s not for everyone. You didn’t stop, you kept trying. Seriously, honestly? I don’t think I could have repeated senior year once, let alone twice, just to get that diploma. That takes balls, you didn’t give up. Everyone’s dumping on you about not graduating, but nobody is looking at the fact that you did that shit for two more years . It didn’t work, but that’s okay, you tried and now you’ve got me helping you and we’re going to get you that GED and leave all of this highschool BS behind you.”
Steve’s pep talk wasn’t anything fancy, but there was something about the gravity of his words, and for Eddie, to hear someone acknowledge that he had tried in his own way, that was enough to make his eyes burn with the threat of tears. He took a deep swig of his beer, still trying to find the right words to make himself still sound like he had some semblance of control over himself.
“Besides,” Steve continued before Eddie could think of a response. Sipping his beer, Steve gave a halfhearted shrug, “maybe if you get this GED I might be inspired to join one of your little… campaign things. That would make the kiddies happy, wouldn’t it?” Even though the idea of playing D&D had caused Steve to grimace a little, Eddie couldn’t help but feel himself overcome with a sense of affection. Steve was trying hard to look indifferent, but the way his eyes were darting Eddie’s way, he was clearly trying to gauge if his comment had pleased the metalhead.
It did more than just please Eddie. He was fumbling with his beer, feeling his ears grow hot and his hands grow clammy. It had been kind of infatuating, the way Steve continually made efforts to show Eddie that he could do and be better. It made him want to both punch Steve and also drag him into a hug.
A small thought hit him, a thought about what it would be like to kiss Steve, to grab him and pull him in right when he looked Eddie’s way with that look of frustrated concern that seemed to be reserved just for Eddie. His beer suddenly felt tasteless in his mouth suddenly, and it was then that the revelation hit him, why he’d felt so jealous of Steve, why he couldn’t decide on befriending him or pushing him away, and why when it came to Steve, Eddie was an utter failure at saying no.
Eddie was falling in love.
Well shit .