Work Text:
I was sitting uncomfortably in the choir stalls at the village church. If I was honest, I would have preferred to not be there, and by the occasional glances I saw between my fellow choir members, I was not alone. Not that I particularly objected to the choir stalls, I was accustomed to being there for the main church festivals, which I enjoyed, even if the stalls were hard and rather cramped. No, it was the occasion which was making us uncomfortable.
We were there for a wedding. Again, normally an enjoyable event, but this one seemed to be fraught with tension. The bride lived in the village, and her family had been keen that the service be held in the local parish church. They did not care for the bridegroom, who came from the nearby market town, and were determined to do all they could to remind their daughter what she would be leaving once she was married.
It was a strange atmosphere. The church was full, but there was a very clear divide between the bride’s side and that of the bridegroom. This, again, was unusual. Even when the two families came from different villages there was usually connections between the two sides, be it from working for the same employer, or the friendly rivalry between village football or cricket teams. Today there seemed to be nothing.
Surveying the congregation as we waited for the bride to arrive, I was surprised to see Holmes sitting in one of the back pews. I wondered what had brought him to the service and hoped he would not be a sign of something untoward happening.
However, the service proceeded in its usual fashion, and the vicar started to utter the time-honoured words, “If anyone knows any just cause or lawful impediment why these two people should not be joined together in holy matrimony let him speak now.”
At that moment a burly gentleman stood up and, pulling the visibly pregnant young lady seated next to him to her feet, said, “This man promised my girl they would get married. What have you got to say to that?”
All heads swivelled towards the vicar, who stuttered, “Actually that’s not a lawful reason, so the wedding can still go ahead.”
There were a number of gasps, as might be expected.
Then the bride said, “On no it can’t. If that’s what you’ve done, Harry Pinker, then I’m not marrying you, and I’m very grateful I’m not in the same condition.” With that she burst into tears and ran out of the church.
The bridegroom swung round at the bride’s father and snarled, “You go and get her back this instant. We’re getting married.” At which point the bride’s brother said, “Don’t you speak to Dad like that,” and raised his fist.
While this was going on the best man stormed down the aisle to confront the burly gentleman. He was met by one of the sidesmen, who, following a brief altercation, forcibly ejected the best man from the church.
Some of the younger choir members leapt up ready to join in the fray, while we older members sat back to watch the spectacle. The vicar tried hard to restore order and remind everyone they were in the house of God, but it was the church warden, a stone mason, who announced loudly that he had the power to fine anyone caught fighting within the church.
We rather doubted that, but it had the desired effect and the congregation piled outside to continue the fight on the village green. The local bobby watched from the side lines. It seemed that the townsfolk had underestimated the physical strength of the villagers and were soon making a hasty escape. The bobby contented himself with ensuring no excess force was used, reminded a few of the local hotheads that any further violence would not be countenanced, and returned to his duties.
Holmes was waiting for me as I left the church.
“Was that your doing?” I asked.
“The bride’s mother mentioned to me that if I could do anything to help prevent the marriage, she would be grateful. Initially, I was reluctant, believing that one should be allowed to love whoever one wishes, but a few enquiries led me to realise that this young man really wasn’t a suitable husband, and that his intention in marrying the girl was purely for financial gain. I then dropped a few hints and waited to see what happened. Her reaction confirmed to me that she was already having second thoughts, since there seemed no doubt in her mind that the accusation was true.”
“So, all’s well that ends well?”
“Except that you won’t get to sing the anthem you’ve been practising.”
I laughed. “Henry Green’s mother is in the choir. I’m sure she’ll persuade him to have the anthem when he gets married later this summer. And at least that wedding won’t descend into a fist fight.”
“I shall look forward to it.”