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Tommy and Wilbur sat together on Wilbur's sofa, only a foot of space between them in reality and about a world between them in Tommy's mind. Not that there was anything wrong between them, they weren't in a fight and honestly they were as close if not closer than ever. And this was the first time in a while they got to be together like this, all relaxation and no work to do. But he couldn't help the distance he felt or the shallow empty feeling that was there for some reason.
"Will" he mumbled, not really knowing what was wrong but knowing something was. Wilbur glanced up from the TV and directed his gaze to Tommy. "I think.. I think I'm sad" he admitted blandly, laying his head on his knees. Wilbur furrowed his brows, feeling the want to help but not understanding. He didn't think he'd ever seen Tommy sad.
"Oh.. Ok. Wanna talk about it?" He asked, reaching a hand out and setting it on his shoulder. Tommy did lean into the touch and he did want to talk but what was there to talk about.
"I guess. I don't really know honestly. I just feel this pit" he tried to explain. "Like in me and it's kind of just bland. Not always but, A lot lately" he told, trying to connect the instances in his head. He didn't have the heart to let the older man know it was usually when they were together. Hell he didn't get why. He loved being around Wilbur. He wanted to be around him so much. To be close to him. A mental pause came with that thought, and he glanced at the older man out of the corner of his eye…
Closer. He scooted across the cushion, slow and hesitant, making Wilburs hand on his shoulder slide. Wilbur didn't seem to mind, letting his arm slip around the blond's shoulders, thinking he just needed a bit more comfort of the physical form. Tommy's suspicions were almost instantly confirmed, his heartbeat speeding up and that blank feeling fading slightly. It felt nice, and warm and.. And safe he decided.
He leaned further into it, laying his head on Wilbur's shoulders and ignoring the heat that rose throughout his body. It was intoxicating and all he wanted was more of his touch. Slowly he wrapped an arm around the man's waist, keeping his face against his shoulder. Wilbur let it happen, honestly enjoying it. He himself was pretty touch starved.
"How long have you been feeling like this?" Wilbur asked, snapping the other man out of his trance. Tommy sighed, letting his eyes shut as he thought about it. Hugging Wilbur made him feel better so his desire to be on or.. Or with him was what it was. And he couldn't think of a time he didnt wanna be with him. But to this level?
"Maybe.. Half a year" he guessed, not sure if he was over or underestimating it. Wilbur felt a stabbing in his heart at the idea of Tommy silently suffering so long. And he wasn't sure how he himself hadn't noticed a difference in his behavior. "But this makes it better" he added after a second. Wilbur nodded slowly.
"We can stay like this for as long as you want" he promised. Tommy smiled at that, letting himself get more comfortable in the position. He knew he couldn't just snuggle up to the man like this and let everything happen without talking about his feelings. That was selfish.
"I think I've been sad that we're so far apart," he explained.
"Tommy we're almost always together," he pointed out. Tommy sighed, lifting his face and making eye contact. His own eyes were slightly glassy but he couldn't get that to stop.
"But not like this.. Not like how I want" he spoke softly, reaching a hand up to cup Wilburs jaw and hopefully explain what he was trying to get out. Wilbur only watched him, clearly thoughtful. He only mumbled a small 'oh'
"Like this?" He asked, matching Tommy's gentle tone as he grabbed the blond by the hips and shifted him onto his lap in a more comfortable and intimate way. Tommys let it happen, legs spreading to each side of the older man as he looked down at him. It felt even better but still not like enough.
"It's going the right direction" he agreed, making Wilbur laugh at him slightly. He himself had been wanting this for longer than he could know. "But I need you so much closer," he admitted. Wilbur smiled at that, taking Tommy's hands in his own. "Closer" Tommy prompted, leaning down slightly with an obnoxious grin. Wilbur snorted, holding the man's face and meeting him halfway there in a soft kiss. It felt absolutely beautiful, and was so close to perfect.
"Closer" he instructed as they pulled back apart. Wilbur laughed at that, shoving the blond off of his lap and leaning over him.
"Tom Simons, I am not making love to you on my shitty sofa. Not today at least" he chuckled, making Tommy stick his tongue out at
him.
" Make love~" he teased, and Wilbur groaned at that.
"Oh my god Toms, some people say make love. Its not that dumb" he defended. And Tommy didn't want to argue that.
"Make love " he repeated himself, emphasizing the word that was making him feel so fuzzy.
"Yeah.. Cuz I love you" he pointed out like it was absolutely obvious. " And it's much nicer to say than fuck your brains out" and while that was true the I love you was absolutely changing Tommy's world.
"I love you too" he mumbled, pulling Wilbur down on top of him and cuddling up. Wilbur smiled, wrapping both arms around the blond and going back to whatever show they had been watching before.
And Tommy finally felt close enough.