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The morning sunlight broke through the canopy of leaves, fragments of light breaking through the dark forest and dancing on the uneven stone steps Zagreus climbed. He hadn’t realized how many steps there would be, and how perilous it would be to walk. At least the climb up the hill was cool and quiet, distant birds singing from the tops of the trees. It was beautiful and serene, the ideal spot for a place people came to meditate and pray. A gray stone torii gate came into view as he hiked up the never ending stairs to the shrine that was hidden at the top. While the steps were enshrouded in dark thanks to the old, huge trees, the top of the hill was bright and almost blinding, the greenery giving away to an old wooden shrine. Zag stopped to take a picture of the gate with his phone before curiously and tentatively wandering onto the grounds.
Beyond the gate was a strange stone basin with a metal dragon winding around one end and gently spouting water into the basin. On the edge of the basin were a few wooden ladles. Zag had read about this. You were supposed to wash and purify your hands before you entered the shrine. He admired the dragon and the soothing trickling of the water when he heard a distant scratching sound. There was a very broad shouldered man in a starched white kimono with light blue hakama and sandals sweeping the stone path in front of the shrine.
Weren’t shrine priests supposed to be bearded old men? This man looked to be around Zag’s age, with long silvery hair that tumbled like a waterfall over his shoulders. Zag couldn’t help but stare, because he was strikingly beautiful. The man caught him ogling and stopped sweeping, returning his broom to a nearby wheelbarrow full of gardening tools before heading towards him. Zagreus embarrassedly shot his eyes to the basin but wasn’t sure how to use it, so he mocked interest in the dragon’s intricate details.
“Is this your first time here?” His voice was much too deep and sensuous for someone who worked in the priest profession. His amber eyes and grin were warm and friendly, and Zag wondered why he wasn’t a model or an actor.
“Ah, yes. I’m not from around here,” he stuttered and touched the back of his neck. The priest stood still with excellent posture and hands folded neatly in front of him, listening, while Zag couldn’t stop nervously twitching and moving.
“Do you know how to purify before entering the shrine?” He asked curiously, and Zag shook his head. “Shall I show you?”
“Please. Thank you.” Zag used his best manners and scolded himself any time his eyes lingered too long on the gorgeous man before him. He knew his sect wasn’t strict compared to others about sexuality and relationships, but he still felt guilty staring disrespectfully at someone who served the gods. Angering them would defeat his whole purpose of coming.
The priest demonstrated how to dip the ladle into the water to wash both hands, then rinse his mouth and then rinse his hand again. Zag followed along with him, trying to mimic his actions as well as he could.
“May I ask why you visited today?”
“Oh, well, I was just curious and thought I’d come pray. I recently moved and started a job here and could use some of the local gods on my side.”
The priest beamed, pleased with his answer. “Definitely a good reason to come. Shall we?” He gestured for him to walk beside him and they entered the shrine grounds. Zagreus had originally come to quietly take in the sights of the sacred place and pray, but he was completely distracted chatting with the amiable priest. His name was Thanatos, and his mother was a retired priestess of the shrine. Thanatos asked his name and about his new job, and Zagreus was surprised how they chatted easily, like they’d been friends for years. In spite of how friendly the chatter was, Thanatos was always polite, still walking poised and with flawless manners.
They meandered to the front of the wooden shrine, where a giant rope and bell hung from the ceiling. Behind it was a wooden box. Zagreus had definitely seen a place to pray like this before on TV. Through the giant wood-framed windows of the building, he could see some priests chanting words he didn’t understand while adding fruit and bottles of alcohol offerings on an elaborate gold altar. It was all very strange and new to him, but it was fascinating.
“What do I do first? I don’t want to mess this up.” He looked to his guide for assistance.
“First, you toss a coin into this box as an offering. Then you ring the bell to purify the area.” Zag carefully tossed a coin in and rung the bell. “Next, you bow twice, clap twice, pray, then bow once more when you’re done.” It sounded simple enough, but he had a feeling he’d make a mistake anyway. Thanatos was kind and did the movements along with him. Zag closed his eyes and prayed in his head. He wished his new engineer career would start smoothly, that this new chapter in his life will bring him a lot of joy and growth. He prayed for his family and their health back at home. At the end of his prayer, he hastily added he wanted to find love with a wonderful partner. After he opened his eyes and bowed, he felt a wonderful sense of peace within him. Was this a sign that the gods heard him and would grant his wishes? Turning to Thanatos, he saw the serenity that was within him reflected in his face. He felt a strong magnetic pull to him as they shared the same sentiment. Did Thanatos feel the attraction between them, Zag wondered, or was he romanticizing the entire situation? He was getting way too excited over someone he just met, and he chided himself.
“Are you alright? Do you need a moment?” Thanatos was looking on, concerned, and that’s when he realized he had disappeared into his own conflicting thoughts and probably looked worried, his trademark look when he was pondering deeply about something.
“I’m sorry. I’m fine, but I have a million questions for you.”
Thanatos’ eyebrow raised and he chuckled lightly. “I see. Fire away.”
Zagreus exhaled at his casual language and relaxed. He wanted to know all about him and his position as a priest. Thanatos explained how a priest was a medium between people and the gods, and they helped bridge the gap with offerings, prayers, chanting, and ceremonies. Helping people be heard by the gods in order to receive blessings was an important part of their work. Although he wasn’t married yet himself, his favorite part of his work was performing weddings and blessing new couples with good fortune in their future. They listened in on the chanting in the shrine, sitting on the tatami mat floor on cushions. Although it seemed dull and monotonous, he wondered if Thanatos’ voice would make it more appealing. Maybe it was his imagination, but Thanatos’ eyes were always on him, even when they didn’t need to be. All through the chanting, he didn’t look once at the priests, keeping his eyes glued to him. Zagreus knew he looked unique: he had dark hair that was always wild and sticking up, and one of his eyes was chocolate brown, the other leaf green. He always was a bit disheveled, and today he was wearing a slightly wrinkled plaid button down shirt and jeans. The way Thanatos smiled and wore a slight blush of color on his cheeks made Zag think that he wasn’t staring because he looked unusual. Zag’s heart sputtered and felt a little self-conscious at the idea of this dazzling man checking him out.
“Do you wish to purchase an omamori?” Thanatos inquired when they tired of listening to the chanting and returned outside.
“What’s that? Are those the little amulets, the good luck charms?”
“Yes, there are different ones for different purposes. There are ones to help bless students taking exams, others for good health, another for safety while driving. We priests make them and bless them, in hopes the gods will bestow what blessings the person needs onto them.” He escorted him over to a small stand full of various trays of colorful omamori. They were small rectangles covered in silk with a cord at the top for tying, and they reminded Zag of bookmarks. Some were easy to recognize what the blessing was: there were some with baby footprints on them for a safe baby delivery, a pencil and book for successful study, a lucky cat with its paw raised for general good luck. He was admiring all the various beautiful designs when he noticed Thanatos was turning one in his hand over and over pensively.
“What’s that one you have?” He pointed to it, a unique dark purple with a golden rope tied in a bow at the top.
“This one? It’s mine, actually.” He showed him the painted design of a little mouse character on one side. The mouse had golden ears and a big purple nose, which was a little strange, but he liked the uniqueness of it. He wondered what the story was behind the mouse.
“You have your own personal omamori? It’s very cute.” Zag smiled.
“I felt compelled to make it this morning. I don’t quite understand why, but maybe—“ he cut off, seeming distant in his thoughts, but finally held out the small charm with both hands to him. “Would you accept it? It is a good luck and protection amulet.” Zag could swear there was a bit of color in his cheeks again as he looked down at the charm in his hands.
“Really? Are you sure? Maybe it’s meant to be yours, since you made it with your own design,” Zag responded, flabbergasted.
“No, it’s not meant for me. I blessed it, so it’s meant for someone else.” He looked certain and continued to hold out the amulet, his eyes like molten gold. His intense expression made Zag’s heart jump wildly in his chest, as if Thanatos was gazing into his soul and offering a piece of himself. It surprised him, and he felt his breath catch in his throat. “This amulet has the power to summon me. If I give this to the person it’s meant for, that is. When they are in danger, they can squeeze it and summon me on the spot to help.” His voice was completely serious, and all Zag could do was stare blankly, the romantic moment with the beautiful priest broken by his absurd statement.
“What?” He responded dumbly, thinking he misheard.
“The rightful owner of this amulet can summon me with it, the gods instructed me.”
Did he mean like a physical wizard kind of summoning, or an intangible summoning of good luck and fortune through his power? Physically calling upon someone was impossible, but deep down, he wanted to believe what he said. Who wouldn’t want to command a handsome man like him to their aid? What did he mean by ‘the person it is meant for?’ Maybe he said these kinds of things to lay on the charm and sell amulets. Should he turn it down, even if he felt an undeniably strong connection to him? Would it be more rude to accept it or reject it? His head was swimming, and he went with his first impulse. He carefully picked up the charm from his hand, and when his fingertips brushed his palms, he felt a pleasant tingling run through his body, all the way down to his toes. There was that undeniable spark between them. Since he was accepting this special amulet of his, could he be daring and ask for his number too? He was still willing to give him a chance, even if he did believe in some odd magic.
“How much is this? I feel like it’s hard to put a price on this particular omamori,” the ends of his mouth crooked up as he gently held it.
“Free. I already made an offering to the gods after I made it. Take care of it, maybe tie it to your bag and keep the good luck with you.” Okay, he wasn’t just trying to make money for the shrine. This made Zagreus sigh internally in relief.
“How should I properly tie it on? Is there a special way?” He looked at the messenger bag slung over his shoulder and fingered the metal ring that attached the bag to the strap.
Thanatos chuckled. “There’s no certain way. May I?” He returned the amulet to him and watched as he tied it securely to the ring. “Is this alright?”
“Yes, thank you. I don’t want to lose it.”
“Take care of it.” Thanatos smiled and Zagreus glanced at his watch. Receiving this supposedly magical amulet cultivated even more questions, but it was regretfully time to say goodbye. He needed to stop into his new office before it got too late.
“I’ve got to be going, but thank you.”
“I hope we meet again, Zagreus.” His voice was velvety and enticing, and he wondered if he could find an excuse to climb all those steps and drop by the shrine again soon.
Zagreus settled into his new job and new life remarkably easily. His new coworkers and boss were welcoming and helped him with any problems that arose as he learned the ropes. He joined a local archery club and made friends that he hung out with on weekends. Things were always going his way. There was a rock concert he wanted to nab hard-to-get tickets for, and he was lucky enough to win some. Another time, he dropped his wallet on a train and it was returned to him with all his money and belongings untouched. He didn’t visit the shrine because his schedule was always full, but the omamori remained on his bag, and when he looked at it, he always remembered Thanatos and smiled warmly. He considered telling his new friends the story of his one and only shrine visit and the breathtakingly hot priest, but he liked keeping it to himself, a sweet secret of an encounter he’d never forget. Sometimes he wondered if his good luck was because of the omamori and Thanatos’ blessings, but he wanted to work hard and make his own luck. He never tried to squeeze it like Thanatos instructed, feeling silly the few times he considered it. It was ridiculous to think such a thing could happen.
About 3 months passed, and one evening he was leaving work and walking down the crowded sidewalk to the train station when his luck completely changed. He was daydreaming about what he’d have for dinner and tugging off his necktie when someone grabbed his white dress shirt from behind and shoved him along, into a dark alleyway.
“What the fuck? Let me go!” He threw his elbow back at the person, but they dodged him easily. At the end of the alley, a group of 3 thugs in black were waiting for him, grinning as if they’d been eagerly awaiting his arrival.
“Hey salaryman! Give us all your cash!” One demanded while the other two scrambled to put out their cigarettes and back him.
“Can’t even ask nicely?” Zagreus sneered. “Didn’t your mama teach you anything?” These idiots didn’t scare him; he got into fights plenty of times in his school days and knew he could hold his own ground.
The leader wound up and tried to deck him, but he easily moved out of the way and counterattacked with a kick to his back. Zagreus had overestimated what he could handle, though, because one of the other men was strong and pinned his arms back, holding him in place while the others took turns landing punches and kicks. Zagreus felt the blood trickle down his face and his mouth fill with the bitter metallic taste. He hovered close to unconsciousness as he struggled to break free and they continued to assault him. Closing his eyes, he was shoved to the ground and bag ripped from him. His head was screaming in pain and he could barely see through the blood pouring down his face. Lying there seemed like the best option, the only thing he could do. Take his money, he didn’t care. He just wanted to walk away with his life.
When he opened his eyes, there was something purple in front of his face on the cement, but he couldn’t focus to tell what it was. He blinked and tried to clean his eyes with his hand without drawing attention. When it dawned on him what it was, he shakily grabbed the dropped omamori as the thugs distractedly ripped through his bag. Walking away with his life and this failed amulet was the best he could hope for. He squeezed the omamori, knowing his luck had finally run out and there was no such thing as magic.
He closed his eyes as he fought through the fogginess of his mind. There were sounds of a struggle and shouting, and he wiped his eyes with the back of his hand again and rolled onto his back to see what was happening. A dark jeans and t-shirt clad figure was pummeling one of the thieves while the others were already crumpled on the ground around him. He had a guardian angel that was bloodthirsty for revenge. When he had successfully knocked all of them out, the huge figure scooped him up carefully.
His savior carried him down the alleyway, and Zagreus closed his eyes and felt relief wash over him, his entire body sagging into his protector’s chest as all the tenseness melted from his muscles.
“Zagreus, stay with me. Don’t pass out.” Zagreus could feel the rumble in his chest as he spoke urgently. He knew he was fading out of consciousness and welcomed it, wanting to erase all the pain, confusion, and embarrassment he felt. His hero gently squeezed his leg, pulling him unwillingly back to the present. When they stepped into the light, he reflexively screwed his eyes shut tighter, but once they adjusted, he cracked them open. Zag saw long silvery hair cascading around his shoulders, and he swore he was hallucinating. He had to already be unconscious and enjoying wishful thinking. Closing his eyes, darkness finally covered him like a soothing blanket.
Zagreus opened his left eye to find himself in a hospital bed, staring out from a small partitioned area in a busy emergency room. He watched doctors and nurses walk swiftly past with patients in wheelchairs and stretchers. His head felt like a giant bag of lumpy potatoes, his right eye swollen shut. His entire body ached, but it was tolerable compared to the splitting pain he felt during the fight. The IV stuck in his arm must be the reason why he wasn’t in more pain. He didn’t remember how or when he got there, and he began panicking, a giant black smudge on his timeline between the hero coming to his rescue and now.
His guardian angel.
He tried to call for a nurse but his voice came out as a croak. He then noticed the nurse call button by his hand. He pressed it, and a nurse appeared within seconds.
“You’re awake, how you feeling, hon?” The woman in scrubs asked him in a honeyed tone as she checked his IV.
“Not so great,” he managed to groan.
“I’ll go get your friend, alright?” She gently rubbed his shoulder and left.
He expected a stranger with long silver hair similar to Thanatos’ to wander in, but even in street clothes with his hair pulled back in a loose ponytail, it was clearly him. His golden eyes locked on to his, his brow furrowed.
“You okay, Zagreus?”
“You remember my name?” His voice cracked out, but clearly his mouth and head were not connected, because that wasn’t what he wanted to say.
“Of course. Do you remember me?” He stood next to his bed, thumbs hooked on the pockets of his dark jeans.
“Thanatos. You look different.” He tried to grin, but it hurt too much and he winced. Thanatos grinned as he fished something out of his pocket. The mouse amulet was a bit soiled, but it was still in one piece. He held it out to him and Zagreus carefully took it from his hands. Like the first time they touched, his fingers brushed his hand and his cool skin sent tingles through his body. He wished he could remember Thanatos carrying him, cradling him close to his broad chest after sweeping in to rescue him like a white (haired) knight. Zagreus didn’t know how to define this electric bond between them, but he was determined to figure it out. “How did you find me? Did I summon you?” He held up the amulet.
“What do you think?” Thanatos smirked.
“I don’t know, I hardly believe you’re real. You’re a shrine priest who came to my aid by taking out an entire gang by yourself.” He tried to raise his eyebrows but this also hurt too much.
“I’m real,” he chuckled as he held out his hand to Zagreus. “Do you need to confirm that I’m a flesh and blood human?”
Zagreus tentatively pinched the palm of his hand, and Thanatos captured his hand gently, brushing his thumb over his knuckles. Zagreus’ heart leaped into his throat and he lost the ability to breathe.
“You didn’t answer my question. Did I summon you with that omamori?” He breathed quietly once his heart dislodged. Frowning, Zagreus squeezed his hand, trying to summon the answer from him. Thanatos looked on, beaming, his eyes sparkling mischievously as he continued to caress the top of his hand. It was sending sparks through him like he’d never felt before.
“Do you believe in fate… in destiny, Zag?”
The way he called him Zag, in that deep, sensual tone made his whole body shiver. Thanatos bent his head closer to his, his eyes swallowing him up in their intensity. His plush lips were mere inches from his, parted slightly.
“I do now,” Zagreus responded assuredly and pulled him in to tenderly touch their lips together.