Chapter Text
Prologue
Brows furrowed, Albedo flipped through a journal’s yellowed pages. Notebooks were haphazardly spread across his workstation in Dragonspine. Next to him a vial on a burner boiled. Albedo skimmed his writing in the journal. Smudged notes filled the margins. Many words had been crossed out and rewritten.
Albedo read his latest entry. “What is the truth and meaning of this world? Does ‘truth’ imply there is some deception about this world? Or is it something more philosophical such as happiness or leading a virtuous life?”
Snow fell. The torch beside him flickered low. Exhaling, Albedo rubbed his eyes with a thumb and forefinger. Everything ached.
Wind blew through Albedo’s camp, whistling and howling. Albedo tensed. Was that a voice? He rose from his stool to head to the camp’s entrance.
Before him lay steep slopes of snow. Fog obscured the base of the mountain. No people or hilichurls trekked across the snow. The boney carcass of a dragon that had long since passed rose into the sky. No life; only fog, snow, and bones. Only shades of white.
Legs heavy as lead, Albedo trudged back to his work table. Sat down. Hissing, the vial boiled over. Eyes narrowed, Albedo frowned. Wait, what was I…? What was I doing?
After a moment, Albedo glanced down at his journal. He reread his notes. No matter how many years passed or pages he filled he was still no closer to an answer.
A voice in the back of his mind asked, Is that all there is to life? A fruitless search for meaning?
Albedo blankly looked ahead, his gaze a thousand-yard stare. The last of the vials’ liquid evaporated, leaving nothing but vapor.
Chapter 1
“Chalk White”
Exhaling, Lumine wiped sweat off her forehead. She hefted her traveler’s pack laden with Scarlet Quartz chunks. Turning around, she scanned the area. Before her, Starglow Cavern’s frozen lake shimmered. Crystals and icicles glowed an ethereal blue. Icy rock pathways rose above her head. The scuffles of Hilichurls overhead echoed throughout the cavern.
Beside her, Albedo crouched to fasten a pickaxe to his backpack. “That should be a sufficient quantity of quartz.”
Lumine smiled. “Thank you for your help, Albedo. I know this is pulling you away from your research.”
“It’s my pleasure. I apologize I couldn’t recall Paimon’s request for a Sunsettia orchard. But with this Scarlet Quartz, I can create heated water pipes, ensuring the water for the orchard won’t freeze. And besides…” Standing up, Albedo slung his backpack over his shoulders. He faced her, teal eyes softening. “I told you before. You’re a true friend to me. So if you are ever in need, I’m happy to help. Consider this repayment for all the aid you’ve lent me. Between developing Festering Desire, tracking down my imposter, and your aid during the Irodori festival I have quite a bit of catching up to do.”
Chuckling, Lumine tucked a strand of her hair behind an ear. “You’re too kind.”
Lumine snuck a glance at Albedo. She studied his fluffy ash-blond hair. Sharp cheekbones. A brushstroke of pink spread across his cheeks and dotted his nose from the cold. Despite the chilly air, Albedo regally held his shoulders straight and kept his head held high. He gently smiled at her.
Face warm, Lumine looked away. Bit her lip. A true friend… Shivering, Lumine rubbed her hands together. “Geez, it’s so cold! My fingers are freezing.”
“Ah, forgive me. I have a warming bottle, if you would li—”
Lumine held Albedo’s hand. Intertwined her fingers with his.
Albedo froze. Lips parted, he stared down at their joined hands. Jaw set, Albedo looked away, his flush deepening. “I… suppose that is another method.”
Lumine fought to keep a grin off her face.
Pulling on his hand, Lumine headed towards the exit. But, clearing his throat, Albedo stood still, his hand falling out of her grasp. He asked, “Do you remember how last time you visited, I promised I’d draw a portrait of you? If we head back now, perhaps I can make good headway on it before supper.”
“That would be nice!”
Nodding, Albedo walked past her, heading deeper into the cavern. “Then let’s be off.”
Lumine hung back and gazed down at her hand. She clenched it. More data needed!
Albedo dabbed his paintbrush across a canvas. “Almost ready.”
Lumine sat on a stool across from him. Hands in her lap, she posed with her knees slightly off to side but faced him, just as Albedo directed. Lulled by the sound of the crackling campfire, Lumine found her gaze unfocused. Behind Albedo lay his camp. Alchemic implements and papers covered the workbench. Well-read books lined the bookcases. Campfire smoke billowed into the air.
“Finished.” Exhaling, Albedo stepped back from easel. “Traveler, is this to your liking?”
Lumine stood beside him to look. Gasping, she covered her mouth with a hand.
The painting showed Lumine walking through a field of cecilias. Lumine looked back at the viewer with her hand extended, as if beckoning them to come be with her. The wind billowed her hair and dress. Petals danced around her. Her smiling face glowed.
“Albedo, this is… this is beautiful. But how…? This wasn’t my pose.”
“It’s an old piece I started shortly after your aid with Festering Desire. Having you model in person helped me with the finishing touches.”
Lumine pressed a hand to her chest. “So you’ve been thinking of me…”
Albedo stepped closer, his gaze locked with her. “What if I said that I was?” He smirked. “It’s obvious you have been, given your little hand holding ploy. You must have devised such a scheme in advance. Or are you naturally that good?”
Lumine raised a brow. “Want to find out?”
Eyes narrowed, Albedo flicked his gaze down to Lumine’s lips. “Should be an interesting experiment. Very interesting indeed…”
Lumine’s heart pounded. This close to each other, they breathed the same air. Swallowing, Lumine closed her eyes. All she felt was the cold air against her face. Lumine opened her eyes to see Albedo frowning, his mouth open as if to say something.
After a moment, Albedo stepped back. He smiled tightly. Nodded. “Enjoy the painting, Tra—Lumine. I’ll prepare dinner now.”
“Al-Albedo?”
Lumine reached out a hand towards him. But he turned his back to her.
Lumine and Albedo sat on stools beside each other eating dinner. A pot of soup simmered over a small campfire. As they ate Woodland Dream, Lumine regaled Albedo with tales of her adventures. Albedo nodded along, only interrupting to ask a question here or there.
“And as Paimon and I headed deeper into the Chasm, we found a massive glowing mushroom! It was such a scenic view. Wait, I think I took a picture. Hold on.” After swallowing the last bite, she dug through her pack before handing Albedo a stack of pictures.
Eyes alight, Albedo flipped through the stack. “Simply breathtaking… What a fascinating device a Kamera is. All the sketching I could create without worry of my memory fading or the light changing throughout the day…”
“You can keep it,” said Lumine. “I have another Kamera. And if I ever need another one, I know someone in Liyue.”
“Are you sure?” When Lumine nodded, Albedo shook his head. “You’re always so generous, Traveler. But I’m afraid I have don’t have a gift for you in return.”
Lumine set her hands on her hips. “You just gave me a beautiful painting!”
Albedo flushed and ducked his head. He murmured, “Thank you…” They fell into comfortable silence as Albedo looked through the polaroids. The fire crackled softly. Its flames cast the messy bookshelves and work table aglow. The smell of fish wafted through the air.
Albedo stopped at a photo of Lumine and Paimon posing before the Chasm’s entrance. Lumine hugged Paimon to her chest while the fairy made a “v” with her fingers. Lumine’s smile was radiant. Albedo stroked a thumb across the photo. He breathed, “I wish I was there with you…”
“You could have been.” Hand on her chest, Lumine leaned forward. “I’ve often thought of the same thing as I traveled.”
Lips parted, Albedo lowered the photos to gaze at her. “You… you have?”
“Yes, I…” Biting her lip, Lumine looked away. The dying embers only faintly dispelled the shadows across the camp. A chilly wind blew through. In the distance a Mitachurl roared. Lumine hugged herself. “Adventuring is nice, but there’s always this distance between myself and everyone.” People treated Lumine formally for beating Stormterror and Osial. Mistook her for a minor who couldn’t drink when in reality she was far older than them. Lumine bowed her head, bangs covering her eyes. The hands gripping her body tensed. “They befriend me as if I’m human like them, but I’m not. It’s frustrating. But you, Albedo…” Eyes searching, Lumine turned to Albedo. “You understand, right?”
“Yes.” Albedo said, the word slipping out as if he’d been holding his breath and could finally breathe. “Yes, yes, I do. And before I met you, there was no one whom I could confide in. Relationships are taxing and time consuming, but even after expending all that effort, people will never truly understand the nature of my origins. So why form relationships at all? What purpose is there? Of course, I find meaning working for the Knights and delight being with you and Klee. But…” After a long moment, Albedo sighed, his breath fogging. He lowered his head, eyes downcast. His voice went as soft as snowfall. “During the quiet, such insidious thoughts still plague my mind.”
Lumine frowned. “Albedo…”
Brows furrowed, Albedo gazed at Lumine, their faces only a few hairsbreadths apart. His teal gaze seared into Lumine. “How? How is it possible to bridge this distance between ourselves and others?”
Lumine stilled, hardly daring to believe they were breathing the same air. The wind tousled his hair. At this close distance, Lumine felt like she was drowning in his liquid sea-green eyes.
Inhaling, Lumine closed her eyes. Lumine’s heart beat slowed as a calm washed over her. She placed a hand over his. “I don’t know but…” Lumine cupped his face. Eyes shone. “We can find that purpose. We can close that distance. Together.”
Eyes closed, Lumine leaned in. Pressed her lips to his.
As Lumine withdrew, Albedo sat his eyes still closed as if savoring it. After a moment, Albedo regarded her with a softened gaze. “Lumine, you’re a kind and beautiful woman. But you should save your affections for someone who is capable of reciprocating your feelings.”
Lumine felt like a bucket of ice water had been dumped on her. Her chest tightened. “What…? What do you mean?”
Sighing, Albedo shifted in his seat away from Lumine. Looking away, he watched the fire’s embers. “I am a synthetic being, remember?”
“So? What does that have to do with it? Synthetic or not, you can feel things!”
“I’m not so certain. The theory of Incongruent Perception posits the nature of people’s perspectives can unknowingly be different from each other.” Albedo scanned his camp. An electro insulation potion rested on a workbench. “Take this, for example. That potion. What color is it?”
“Albedo…!”
“Humor me, please.”
Lumine exhaled heavily. She glanced over. “It’s purple.”
“Ah, but is it? You see ‘purple’ is a word we’ve have ascribed to mean a particular shade of color. But what if your ability to perceive color is impaired, and you cannot see anything that’s purple? Perhaps it’s actually green but you have grown accustomed to calling anything that is green ‘purple.’ So we appear to have the same perception, but in reality our ability to distinguish colors is different. Skewed.” Albedo tightly gripped his hands in his lap. “My heart may race with anger and I can shed tears from sadness, but that doesn’t mean what I feel is the same in nature as a human being.”
Lumine’s heart thrummed in her ears. She clenched her fists. “I… I don’t understand. After the imposter incident, you said life existed in all forms. All life, including your own synthetic or not, was precious.”
“And indeed it is. But being content with myself doesn’t change my nature. Doesn’t mean I am capable of feelings to the same depth and breadth as you and humans are. And where exactly do feelings arise from? The brain? Our thoughts, our soul? If from our souls, then…” Albedo laid a hand over his chest. “Then as a synthetic being I don’t have one.” Jaw clenched, Albedo bowed his head, bangs covering his eyes. He fisted the front of his uniform. “No amount of alchemy can ever change that.”
“Are you saying you’re some soulless creature?”
Albedo dipped his head further.
Lumine launched to her feet. “That’s the craziest thing I’ve ever heard!”
Eyes wide, Albedo stared at her. He looked as shocked as if Lumine had slapped him.
“If you stay on this mountain, the only feeling you’re ever going to feel is loneliness.”
Albedo flinched.
“So come with me.” Smiling gently, Lumine extended a hand towards him. The wind billowed her hair and scarf. “Join me on my journey to find my brother and together we’ll experience not just the chalk white of numbness, but a whole kaleidoscope of color.”
For a long moment, Albedo studied her. Snow started to fall. The wind turned frosty as it whipped through the camp, making papers flutter violently. The fire’s embers died out completely. Exhaling softly, Albedo lowered his head.
Lumine heaved a sigh. “Think about it.” Jaw clenched, Lumine walked away. Over her shoulder, she called, “I’ll be waiting for you.”
Albedo didn’t answer, nor did he watch her as she left.
Joel’s father, Joserf, offered Lumine a blanket. “Here you go, Traveler. Warm yourself up with this. Ah, what’s your name again?”
Smiling, Lumine laid the blanket over her lap. “Lumine. And thank you.” She sat on a rock outside a tent. After leaving Dragonspine, Lumine headed to the adventurer’s camp at the mountain’s base.
Joserf scratched the back of his head. “That’s right—Lumine. Sorry, I’m still having trouble remembering things.” Hands on his hips, he gazed out across the camp. “It’s not often we have new visitors.”
Lumine followed his gaze. Crumbled remains of walls offered meager shelter from Dragonspine’s cold winds. Tents flapped in the breeze. Despite the late hour, a few adventurers and researchers milled about swapping tales and exchanging notes. A couple people dined at the table and chairs tucked away in a corner. Crates of supplies piled up high against a wall.
“I saw you coming down the mountain,” continued Joserf. “Were you doing some commission work for the adventurers here? Or did you see Albedo? You two are close, right? Or, at least, when you had found me after I went missing you seemed to be.”
Eyes wide, Lumine looked up. Joserf was gazing up at the mountain. “That’s good. I can’t remember but… I get the feeling that he was someone important to me. He’s gotta be lonely working up there all the time by himself, but every time Albedo comes down here, he always keeps his distance. It’s strange.” Joserf turned to Lumine. “Just… take care of him for me, would you?”
Lumine started, “I…”
“Daddy!”
Joel came running up the dirt path. “It’s time to come home! Dinner’s ready!”
“That rascal,” chuckled Joserf. “Making every excuse to come see me while I’m working. If you need a place to stay the night, you can come with us.”
“Thank you, but I’m going to stay here at camp for now.”
“Then we’ll probably run into each other again tomorrow. Stay warm!”
When Joserf left, Paimon materialized beside Lumine. Frowning, Paimon whispered, “What’s going on? Where’s Albedo? Didn’t you say you were going to confess to him? Paimon patiently waited here all this time just like you asked!”
When Lumine and Paimon first arrived at Dragonspine shortly after the Irodori festival, Lumine asked Paimon to stay behind. “I know you don’t like the cold,” she had said. “And I think I’ll have a better chance at convincing Albedo to make a sunsettia orchard if I go alone.”
Eyes narrowed, Paimon set her hands on her hips. “Paimon is no fool! You just wanna go by yourself so you can kiss each other senseless!”
Lumine blushed to her roots. “Paimon!”
“Well? I’m right, aren’t I?”
Lumine looked away, tugging on a strand of hair. “I-I am interested in him, yes. But after the imposter incident, Albedo needed his space.”
“Ohhhh, Paimon sees where this is going. After eating out with him, sharing drinks, and everything that happened at the Irodori festival, you think he’s more comfortable around you now? And this is your chance to find out what he feels?” Lumine nodded. Huffing, Paimon crossed her arms. “Oh, go on. It’s fine. I’ll stay here eating goulash and making snowmen with Joel and his dad. But you better not forget about my orchard!”
After saying goodbye, Lumine headed up the mountain to see Albedo. Only to return without him less than a day later.
Paimon frowned. “What happened?”
Sighing, Lumine set aside her bowl of stew. When she finished explaining, Lumine looked out across the horizon. Rolling green hills dotted with sweet flowers lay before her. But the chill from Dragonspine behind her seeped through her clothes. “He has to come to me of his own volition.”
“Paimon gets it. It’s like you can’t build a bridge across a divide unless there’s someone working on the other side, huh?”
Lumine dipped her head in a nod. Smiling tightly, Lumine looked up at Paimon. “Do you mind waiting for him? Until he reaches a decision?”
“Of course! Don’t worry, Lumine, he’ll come around. And no matter what, Paimon will always be at your side!”
“Thanks, Paimon.”
Lumine and Paimon remained at the camp, helping Joserf and the researchers study the mountain. Shortly after her arrival, Joserf received letters addressed to Lumine. The Liyue Katherine requested her aid with a few commissions and Kokomi desperately needed assistance with Watatsumi Island’s agricultural yield. Butterflies in her stomach, Lumine set the letters aside for a few days.
At the dawn of the fourth day, Lumine emerged from a tent. She gazed up at the mountain. Thick storm clouds hid Skyward Nail from view. Snow covered its slopes. Only a few foxes crossed the trail leading up to the mountain.
Shaking her head, Lumine walked away, heading towards Mondstadt. She passed Paimon who was eating a chicken skewer. She looked up. “Hmm? Where are you going? Wait!”
Lumine stopped.
“Are you really leaving him behind?”
Jaw set, Lumine clenched and unclenched her fists. “There are people who need me. I can’t keep them waiting any longer.” She continued walking.
Paimon bowed her head. “True but…” Shaking her head, Paimon flew after her.
A new voice rang out. “It took longer than anticipated to design a self-watering system for the orchard, but I was successful.”
Lumine whipped around. “Albedo!”
Paimon gasped. She flew behind a wall out of sight.
Backpack laden with supplies, the alchemist ambled down the stone path to the camp. He gazed off into the distance at Mondstadt. “The weather is fair. The road to Mondstadt should be in good condition. I’d like to say goodbye to Klee, make arrangements with Jean, and—”
Lumine seized him in a hug. Eyes burning, Lumine buried her face in his shoulder. “I thought I’d lose you like I lost my brother.”
After a moment, Albedo returned the embrace. “You won’t. After being left behind myself, I would never do the same to you. No matter what our relationship is, if you need me, I will come to your aid.”
Albedo withdrew. Eyes closed, he took a breath. Meeting her gaze, he said, “I’ve been thinking about you nonstop for days and… the only conclusion I can draw is that I do care for you. Deeply. Can a synthetic being develop the same feelings as you have for me? I… I want to find out. But, Lumine, I may disappoint you.”
Lumine shook her head. “You’re here, you’re trying. That’s all that matters.”
Humming, Albedo held his chin. “But before we depart, there’s one last experiment to conduct.”
“For the orchard? Sure, take as long as you need.”
“No. This.”
Albedo held Lumine’s jaw. Kissed her.
Smirking, Albedo ran a thumb across his lower lip. “Mm, that was every bit as satisfying as I imagined it to be.” Albedo shifted his backpack higher and walked past her, heading down the trail.
Lumine stood frozen, her mouth slightly agape. Chuckling, Paimon emerged from behind a wall. “See I knew you were gonna smooch—”
Lumine flushed. “We won’t share any sunsettias from the orchard with you since you didn’t do any work.”
“Noooo! Paimon is sorry! Paimon will work twice as hard!”
Albedo smiled at Lumine over his shoulder, his hand outstretched to her. The wind blew petals in the air around him, just like in his painting he gave to Lumine. “Shall we be off?”
Laughing, Lumine ran after Albedo to be by his side.