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Considering everything that has happened lately, Kyoutani would say that his aggressive reactions, his constant mood swings and his inability to communicate properly with other people are very normal. He is very normal.
Considering everything that happened when he was a child, building stone walls around him, keeping to himself and minding his own business were normal things, to be expected even. They were very normal.
And being the incredibly normal person that he is, it is very hard for him to communicate.
Now, if you ask him, he is not doing anything wrong. It is not his fault that people are annoying. It is not his fault that they are so stubborn and can’t see what’s right or wrong. It is definitely not his fault that they just are unable to understand him.
Kyoutani is an obstinate person. He has his values, his beliefs and he understands when it’s time for him to back off. He is usually headstrong but respects others and their thoughts. But unfortunately, being the normal person that he is, he can’t express all this correctly. He comes off as rude and disrespectful. That’s why he keeps to himself. He supposes that it is for the best. I mean can you blame him? Talking to his own mother has become draining.
Apparently, talking in your own way and expressing your feelings the way you know best is not appreciated.
Apparently, Kyoutani Kentarou is not as normal as he thinks he is.
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At the age of 10, it was hard for him to make friends for reasons that he still can’t fully grasp. He liked playing with the other kids and he enjoyed their company. Maybe it was his looks. Maybe it was his shitty personality. Maybe it was how awkward he was. Maybe, maybe, maybe. He never really understood. What was so wrong with him that made him so unapproachable?
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At the age of 16, he felt like he didn’t belong. He had all kinds of interests but no one to share them with. And he was angry. He was constantly so unbearably angry and he did not know what to do with himself. He felt tired most of the time. He felt guilty most of the time too, because how can you be tired when you are not doing anything? High School was alright, all things considered. He was doing well in his classes although he hated most of them. He just didn’t really care anymore.
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At the age of 19, he decided he wanted to move out. He was mature enough to make that decision knowing full well the struggles that would follow. He talked with his parents. Not much since they don’t understand. His mother was scared but she also supported him with his decision -she always did, she was supportive sure, she just wasn’t there much you know?- to move out and make a fresh start. His father looked concerned. Well, that was not Kyoutani’s problem. If he wanted to care about him, he is 19 years late.
And so his journey began.
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2 years later Kyoutani finds himself in a big city.
He liked it. He liked how small he felt. He liked how everyone was so busy doing their thing that he went by unnoticed.
The first year after he moved out of his parents house was, well, really hard. He was scared and everything felt unfamiliar. It was hard to adjust to this new lifestyle. But eventually everything fell into place.
He wasn’t completely alone. He met this kind old woman who lived downstairs and owned a small bookstore. She was 80 years old. Her name was Iwaizumi Yua. She was a kind, lovely woman who helped him a lot and made him feel comfortable.
Later on, Kentarou realized she was also a very strong and protective woman. She cared for him like he was her own grandson. Her name suited her. Yua means binding love and affection. Yeah, her name suited her a lot.
After a while Kentarou met her actual grandson.
His name was Iwaizumi Hajime and needless to say, he became a very close friend. He was a year older than Kentarou and he felt like an older brother to him.
Hajime and granny Yua were a lot alike. They both had expressive dark green eyes and they were both kind and protective.
They were good people, Kentarou decided.
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Granny Yua loved telling them stories and talking about her beliefs.
Almost every night, Hajime and Kentarou sat in the comfortable chairs outside her small bookstore and listened to her go on about a variety of things.
Hajime and Kentarou were taught how to make proper tea and that the most important ingredient for a great drink or meal is the positive energy emitted by the maker. That’s also why she always pulled both their ears when they made tea with their big ugly scowls, as she said. She loved their smiles and she demanded to see her boys smile.
This led to a lot of laughter and good old grandma hugs.
Kentarou felt loved.
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One summer night, as they were sitting outside the small bookstore, under thousands of mesmerizing stars, granny Yua was telling them about the love of her life -Hajime’s grandfather who had passed away- and how madly in love they were with each other.
His name was Iwaizumi Akihito. She told them how he was a lovely man. He bought flowers for her and treated her with so much love.
Their first date was a picnic that grandpa Akihito poorly organized. He was very anxious and excited. He wanted everything to be amazing for his love. Imagine his surprise when he realized, he had prepared everything perfectly and brought everything with him except the basket where he had put the food in. Granny Yua said it was a perfect date though.
Iwaizumi Akihito was a kind and strong man. His name suited him. Akihito means bright and compassionate. Yeah his name suits him.
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Granny Yua said that love was a beautiful thing. Love makes us do wonderful or terrible actions. Things we never thought we could ever do. Love is a mystery and we don’t know how it works. We don’t know why we feel like the air is stolen from our lungs, like the ground disappears from under our feet, why the world suddenly feels prettier and even the silliest things make us happy.
Love is all kinds of things. Love is in all things. Love is all things.
Everyone deserves to be loved both platonically and romantically. “People who choose to love and care about you are precious. Family is what you want it to be. It’s not what people think nor what blood decides for us.” is what granny Yua always said while putting her hand on Kyoutani’s cheek.
Kentarou felt safe.
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As much as Kentarou hated it, he still had his bad days.
Bad days were terrible. He felt this boiling anger and so many intense emotions he disliked. He felt like he was suffocating. He felt like he was a disappointment. He just felt so incredibly tired.
How was he so tired when he wasn’t doing a thing?
When he experienced one of his bad days, he would usually shut down. The stone walls he created around him were up again and he didn’t have the strength to put them down.
The difference was that back when he was a child he had no one. Now he had Hajime. Hajime knew him. He noticed his sudden change in behavior and Hajime being Hajime, he wouldn't just let him suffer alone. He would never leave him alone.
Hajime happened to witness one of his bad days and unfortunately for Kentarou it was one of his worst days.
He was physically unable to hold a conversation and he just felt so much anger.
Hajime was stubborn. He wouldn’t leave him alone.
“I hope you know, I am not gonna leave you alone Kyoutani.”
“Don’t you think I would ask for your help if I wanted it?” he was being mean and he knew. He couldn’t stop. It was Hajime’s fault for pushing him.
Lucky for him, Hajime had a lot of experience with shut downs and he knew very well how to handle them. Spending his life with an idiot named Oikawa Tooru certainly helped his case.
“You wouldn’t even ask for help if you were drowning, what makes you think I would wait for you to ask in order to help you? I don’t care what you think you want. I care about you. I won’t leave you alone. Let me help you Kentarou.”
Kentarou was sick. He was sick of himself and he was sick of feeling helpless. But most of all he was sick of Hajime being right. He knew this man for 4 years now.
He is somehow always right and he somehow always knows what you need and when. Kentarou wasn’t sure how to feel about this.
The only thing he knew was that he felt empty and he couldn’t stand the thought of being alone. Especially right now.
He wanted Hajime to stay. He needed his friend. He needed his brother to stay with him.
Kentarou didn’t answer. He just looked at Hajime with red eyes.
He had a look on his face that screamed stay away from me, he looked ready to take out his anger on the next thing that breathed near him.
Maybe that is why no one approached him. Maybe that is why people thought he was scary and violent. Maybe that is why he couldn’t make friends.
Hajime knew better though.
After 4 years with him he knew him well enough to understand that the look in his eyes didn’t mean stay away from me but I am scared.
Kentarou cried that day.
He felt very vulnerable. He had never cried in front of anyone before. Hajime hugged him and held him in his arms until he felt better.
Afterwards they went downstairs at granny Yua’s place. She made tea for them and gave them both tight hugs. She held Kentarou a little longer, as if knowing what had occured.
Kentarou felt cared for.
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After that incident, Hajime suggested Kentarou to join a boxing gym two blocks from there.
He told Kentarou that, he himself occasionally played boxing when he went to the gym.
He had a close friend though, who had been boxing since he was a kid. He happend to own the gym and also be a personal trainer. He would definitely be excited to train Kentarou.
When Kentarou was a child he joined a boxing club. He really liked it and it helped with his anger. It felt good. After practice he felt numb and he couldn’t think about anything. He enjoyed the feeling. It was relaxing to say the least. But boxing isn’t cheap.
His dad was fired from his job which meant they couldn’t afford it anymore. That was also when Kentarou’s anger issues reached their peak. He wasn’t mad at his dad of course. It wasn’t in his control. He was just so angry and now there was nothing to help with his anger either.
So, Kentarou decided to take Hajime’s advice and join the boxing gym.
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It was a completely different experience.
He met Bokuto Koutarou there, which was also a completely different experience.
Kentarou had never met another person like Bokuto. He was a walking ball of energy. Kentarou never liked people like him, they were too noisy and too loud and too annoying for his liking.
Bokuto was different.
Bokuto emitted such a positive and kind energy. He had this aura around him that made you want to be loved by him. He was so strong and empathetic. His feelings were all over the place and you could always tell what he was feeling just by looking at him.
Kentarou couldn’t be happier that this man became his friend.
Not only did he become close friends with him and Hajime, he also became family.
Bokuto Koutarou is an honest man. Kentarou appreciates honesty.
Bokuto cares about his friends and although he might not seem like it, he can understand others and see things from their perspective.
He is a comfortable person.
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Kentarou loved the gym.
He loved sparring. He loved the smell of the punching bags and the boxing gloves.
He loved boxing.
What he loved most was that he was experiencing all this with friends. He was not alone.
For once in his life he had an interest that he could share with someone.
And not just someone, his family. He could share his love with his family and there was nothing better.
Even granny Yua participated sometimes! She takes Kentarou’s boxing gloves and acts like she is sparring with Hajime.
They took a picture once.
It’s a picture that has great value for them.
It’s a picture outside the small bookstore.
Granny Yua is standing in the middle wearing Kentarou’s boxing gloves.
On her right side stands Hajime with a big smile on his face and he is holding a small stray dog -his name is Taro- they decided to adopt. Taro has his tongue out and his ears are up.
On her left side is Kentarou with a grin, he is half-sitting, half-standing beside the small table that they have outside the store.
And behind them, hugging all of them with his big arms stands Bokuto with a big toothy smile.
It’s an important picture for Kentarou. It’s important for all of them. It was a precious moment.
They thanked the kind man who was passing by and decided to take the picture for them. Granny Yua even served him tea but that probably wasn’t just to thank him, Kentarou thought.
Kentarou felt happy.
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Bokuto and granny Yua were a funny duo.
They also met due to a very funny coincidence.
See, Bokuto has a boyfriend.
A boyfriend he adores and treasures more than anyone else. His name is Akaashi Keiji and he is a very beautiful man, that much Kentarou can tell.
According to Bokuto, Keiji is the most beautiful human on this planet. Keiji has the softest hair and he has the prettiest skin! Keiji has 5 moles -yes Bokuto counted- in his face but they are almost invisible! Also two of them are in his lips! Oh, Keiji’s lips are so beautiful.. His lips are soft and they get dark pink when he is sleepy! Keiji also has mesmerizing eyes. His eyes are green and they remind me of emeralds! Akaashi Keiji is the loveliest human. I love him so mu-
According to Bokuto this is Akaashi.
Kentarou likes him. He is also kind and has a special sense of humor. Akaashi is very sarcastic and sometimes mean.
He is always there for his friends though and he is honest. Kentarou is happy that he can call him a friend.
Akaashi is an editor and he really enjoys reading books. If Kentarou remembers correctly he once heard the man mention that he wanted to write his own book someday. Kentarou would love to read it.
One cold winter day, Bokuto came by the small bookstore to buy a gift for his boyfriend. Which he made perfectly clear the moment he stepped in.
“Good morning son, how can I help you?” granny Yua welcomed him.
“Hey hey! Good morning, I would like to buy a gift for my boyfriend.”
Hajime was somewhere in the store helping granny Yua organize some books. When he recognized his friend’s voice he grinned. He didn’t go up to him though, he wanted to see how things would escalate.
“Oh I see..” granny Yua stood up slowly walking towards him.
Bokuto then realized what he had said.
He said boyfriend.
He didn’t know how a grandma would react to that and he certainly was not in the mood to be lectured about something that wasn’t wrong in the first place.
“What does your boyfriend like to read then? Unless you already know what you are looking for of course, hm?” granny smiled at him and waited for his answer.
Bokuto was very confused at first. He didn’t know how to act.
“Erm..he, uh he likes dramas. He also enjoys books on feminism and the equality of genders. But he also enjoys classic literature.” Bokuto felt a bit awkward but in all honesty the granny emitted something kind.. he was not sure.
He was not sure until that asshole Hajime appeared and smiled while slapping his back.
“She is alright man don’t worry. Grandma, I rearranged the shelfs and the books are more organized now, if you need anything else I will be upstairs with Ken.”
Bokuto was relieved. He was comfortable now.
And he came to the conclusion that granny Yua was the best granny and an amazing person. She even made him tea!
He picked an amazing book for Keiji and needless to say, Keiji came by the store a lot.
Granny Yua loved Bokuto very much -of course she loved Akaashi as well, she enjoyed their little chats about several books and authors- she even said that Koutarou is my third grandson. They were very close.
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Granny Yua was not homophobic.
She believed that love is love and everyone deserves to love and be loved no matter who they choose to love.
And of course she was sort of used to Hajime and Tooru. They were together since birth and loved each other more than humanly possible.
They had something special.
Something that would never stop existing. It was a connection stronger than love. It didn’t matter if it was platonic or romantic.
Granny Yua misses Tooru. She always told him to be safe there in Argentina. Hajime also missed Tooru. He missed him a lot and all of them could tell.
Kentarou hadn’t met Tooru yet but he understood just by the way Hajime was looking at him when they videocalled.
Some days were worse than others but they could handle it. They were Hajime and Tooru after all.
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Kentarou loved movies.
They were one of his interests that he would love to share with someone.
Lucky for him Hajime and Bokuto both enjoyed movies as much as he did.
Hajime was not very open about them though.
He was convinced that Godzilla was the absolute best movie to ever exist, and that’s on period. Hajime is a menace.
Bokuto was more open.
He liked all kinds of genres, he didn’t mind exploring new fields. His favorite movie was The Breakfast Club because it was funny but he also cried a lot at the end. Kentarou and Hajime teased him about it.
Now, if Kentarou also cried a little at the end of the movie, well no one has to know.
Kentarou didn’t know if he had a favorite movie. He loved a lot of movies.
He enjoyed the Pirates of the Caribbean series, he loved the Transformers movies, he really liked Dirty Dancing and he had rewatched all Fast & Furious movies more times than he’d care to admit. Batman was also really cool.
But to be honest he didn’t know.
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Sharing their love for movies, they decided to organize movie marathons every Sunday evening.
Sunday was a perfect day since Bo wasn’t working at the gym and Kentarou didn’t go to work on Sundays because the flower shop -granny Yua helped him find a job at this flower shop since the owner needed help. And well Kentarou likes flowers so, why not- was closed.
Hajime was a mechanic so he kind of worked every day. But he could take a break on Sunday if he wanted.
Granny Yua and Akaashi sometimes joined them as well. It was fun.
Kentarou felt warm.
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At the age of 27, Kentarou felt happy with his life.
He was now working with Hajime as a car mechanic.
After a big fight with his boss, Hajime made the difficult decision to start his own thing.
It was a hard decision.
“I don’t know if this is the right thing to do but I am ready to move on and I need something else. I want something that is mine, you know? I want to create something that is the way I want it. I want to be proud of myself.”
It was certainly a difficult decision to make but after long discussions with Bokuto, Kentarou, granny and of course Tooru via video call, Hajime made the decision to follow his heart. He knew that they all had his back but they also reassured him.
“Hajime whatever you choose to do, granny will be here for you my baby.” granny hugged him.
“Iwa, look man I don’t know much about this whole mechanic thing but I know you are pretty damn good at your job bro. I was at the other side of the city and you gave me a full guide on how to fix my car via phone. You got this.” Bokuto shuffled his hair and head locked him.
“I believe in you” Kentarou nodded at him.
“You can do it Iwa chan! You are mean but I’m sure customers will choose you for your looks at least.” came Tooru’s voice from the phone.
They all laughed, despite Hajime’s complaints.
“I appreciate you guys” he said and smiled.
Hajime was happy.
After a lot of struggling, he opened his own garage.
Kyoutani went with him sometimes and he started really liking the job.
He attended some seminars and spent a year on a program that was meant to train young mechanics and then he started working alongside Hajime.
He felt really happy and slowly everything was falling into place.
Hajime was recruiting mechanics because he needed the help at the garage.
It was actually going really well and they had many customers! Hajime was really proud of what he’d achieved. That was also when he recruited Yahaba Shigeru.
Now, Kyoutani liked most of the mechanics at the garage.
Yahaba Shigeru was something else. This boy was a menace.
He got on Kyouatni’s nerves every single time they saw each other. And that’s a lot, taking into consideration the fact that they saw each other at work the whole day.
“How long are you gonna take to fix this? I was 10 and I fixed shit faster.” Yahaba was annoying to say the least.
“Can you handle carrying two wheels at a time or do you want me to carry one for you?” Yeah, Yahaba was seriously getting on his nerves.
“Here let me draw two black lines on your cheeks to match your hair.” he said and this fucker had the audacity to smear oil on his face. Engine Oil on his face.
That was Kentarou’s last straw.
He stood up from under the car hood and grabbed Yahaba by the collar of his shirt.
“‘the fuck is wrong with you?” And the fucker had the audacity to laugh. He was laughing.
Kyoutani was very angry and he probably looked funny with all the oil smeared on his face.
But damn Yahaba had a nice smile.
He wasn’t blind. He admits it when something is beautiful. He is not an ass.
That didn’t change anything though. Kentarou was still very mad.
“Oh, so you can talk after all huh?” Yahaba said, smiling.
Huh
“The fuck is that supposed to mean?”
“I don’t know, you tell me.”
Kentarou considers himself a smart man. Kentarou is very confused right now.
“what?”
And there it is again. Yahaba’s laugh.
These are foreign waters, dangerous waters for Kentarou to swim in.
“You are so dense Kyou”
Huh?
“Wha-”
“Enough with the chit chat. Get back to work, both of you.” Iwaizumi appeared and head locked the two younger boys.
“You are an idiot” Iwaizumi whispered in Kyoutani’s ear.
Huh?
Kentarou considers himself a smart man. Kentarou realized he is also a very dense man.
Apparently Yahaba was flirting with him the whole time. And apparently Kyoutani was supposed to understand that.
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Yahaba was the one to ask him out.
It was a terribly planned confession.
It was terrible because it was planned by Yahaba, Iwaizumi and Bokuto. Kyoutani had no idea how Bo got involved in all this.
Their timing was also terrible.
The original plan was for Yahaba to catch Kyoutani right when he takes his lunch break and confess to him.
Kyoutani did take his lunch break. Kyoutani also had to use the bathroom though.
And Yahaba being the wise man that he is, decided to confess his undying love while Kyoutani was taking a shit.
Yeah.
Yahaba is a very wise man and Kyoutani is a very not-dense-at-all man.
Together they’re even wiser and not-dense-at-all.
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A few months later Kyoutani also decided on which movie was his favorite.
It was one summer night.
Sunday night.
Everyone was present for their established movie marathon.
Granny Yua was there, Akaashi came as well! Yahaba joined them now too.
Hajime was especially happy since Tooru surprised everyone and was at their doorstep the previous morning.
Finally Kyoutani met the famous Oikawa Tooru. He was worse than he sounded on the phone. Oikawa Tooru is a menace.
But Tooru was also family, just like everyone else in this small comfortable room.
And Kentarou loved all of them very much. He appreciated them.
Kentarou and Bokuto were also very happy since Akaashi and Yahaba seemed to get along with everyone very well.
“What do you mean you haven’t watched Ghostbusters?” Tooru asked, almost screaming.
“I can’t understand how you people live like this honestly'' he continued.
“That’s it, we are watching Ghostbusters” he demanded.
I mean you don’t really have a choice when it’s Oikawa speaking.
The only person who can change his mind is Iwaizumi and this lovestruck idiot is too busy hugging his boyfriend who’s in his lap and staring at him.
So yeah.
Ghostbusters it is then.
They watched both movies and they all collectively agreed that they had definitely watched better movies.
Oikawa was shocked and he started explaining that Ghostbusters was an oldie but goldie movie and you people have no taste whatsoever.
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Their movie marathons were always fun after that.
They all decided to be present and never miss it if possible, of course. Sometimes Tooru participated via videocalls too and other times he chose to surprise them and visit them for a week.
Kentarou decided Ghostbusters was his favorite movie.
He didn’t like it all that much.
It reminded him of his favorite people though. It was the movie that reminded him of their friendship. It reminded him of his family.
There were always bad days. Difficult days. For all of them.
But knowing that someone is always next to you and has your back is a comforting thought for sure.
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At the age of 31, Kentarou knows that he is not a normal person.
He knows that he has his flaws.
But he also knows that he is happy.
Kyoutani Kentarou loves his family. He loves his friends very much.
He adores Shigeru more than anyone else in this world. And Shigeru feels the same.
His family loves him very much too.
There will always be bad days but going through them with the people that you love makes things a bit easier.
Kentarou feels complete.
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