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It was no good.
For every step closer that Papa and Mama took, it seemed like there were three huge steps back. Anya had seen them nearly kiss! She had heard their thoughts—how beautiful Papa thought Mama was, how flustered Mama had been when Papa took her hand! Yet, they were both too afraid to do anything about it, and so Anya had decided to take matters into her own little hands.
Mission: Eden Academy Dance
(Make Mama and Papa Kiss)
“Are… are you sure you want me to teach you, Miss Anya?” came Yor’s nervous question. She’d tried to teach their daughter a handful of things—how to fight like an assassin, how to play dodgeball like a pro, how to calculate numbers—all to no avail. And now… now Anya was adamant that she teach her how to dance like a “proper lady.” Sure, the Thorn Princess had danced with her targets plenty of times before she’d killed them, and dancing was not so different from fighting. Yet, she had failed Anya on more than one occasion, and she was no longer confident that she could successfully teach anything . This would be just another failure to tack on to her list, wouldn’t it?
“Uh huh.” Anya knew Mama wouldn’t be very helpful, but that was beside the point. The dance didn’t really matter, after all. What mattered was that her mission went according to plan, and that Mama and Papa kissed.
“Ah… very well then.”
The rest of the afternoon was spent with the radio on, classical music spilling out from the radio’s little speaker, and step after painstaking step taken in the living room. Anya had long since worked up a sweat, pushing aside the strands of pink hair that stuck to her neck and forehead, her body begging for water…or a break… or anything that might possibly end her suffering.
You see, Mama could dance, going so far as to elegantly twirl of her own accord across the living room (something the younger girl had tried and failed to do), but it had been way too much for Anya. She was used to playing spies in the living room, not princesses, and dancing required too much concentration. She had only kept on with the lessons and hadn't called it quits, because Papa was supposed to be home from work any minute now. She would persevere. For. The. Mission.
So, Anya furrowed her brow and reached out with her mind, searching through the crowd of surrounding thoughts for the one voice she needed to hear: Papa’s.
Another rough day at work… I wonder how Yor and Anya have been.
“Anya gives up,” the younger girl sighed to Yor’s shock, just as Loid unlocked the front door and swung it wide. With Papa officially home, it was now time for phase two of her mission. “I guess I’ll never get that Stella…”
“You could get a Stella?” Bingo . Just as planned, Loid was quick to respond, sitting his wallet and hospital badge on top of the kitchen bar. Operation Strix required Anya to become an Imperial Scholar, and while she couldn’t really get a Stella from dancing, she could pretend if it meant her mission would succeed. She thought Loid would understand.
“Anya said Eden Academy is having a school dance next week, and Master Henderson told them he would give a Stella to the most elegant dancer.”
“And you’ve been teaching her?”
“Well… It’s been… difficult… since I’m so much taller than she is, but…”
As if on cue, Anya made a show of carefully placing her hands on an imaginary Bondman, tossing her head back dramatically and closing her eyes. She took one wobbly step forward, then another shaky one to the side, then pretended to be twirled by the invisible spy-man.
It was awful, and she couldn’t ignore the sight of Loid’s face visibly falling. His belief in her abilities was truly flattering.
“Ah, I… see…”
“Teach me, Papa!” It was Yor’s turn to physically deflate, mentally adding yet another failure to her list, but Anya interjected before her Mama could pout. “You could both teach me! Together!”
Loid froze, eyes trailing to meet Yor’s, who nervously asked, “Together…?”
“Like Bondman and the princess in Spy Wars!”
Huh… She does seem to learn better through her spy show… Papa was honestly too easy. If Yor and I dance… It’s possible she’ll learn by watching us, and then she can utilize those skills when dancing in front of the Housemaster.
“Alright,” he finally said, offering Yor his hand in addition to a kind smile. “Just a simple waltz, then?”
Anya cleared her throat, smiling innocently up at her parents, “Papa, that’s not how Bondman would speak to a princess.”
“Um… Princess Yor, uh… Might I h-have this dance?” For being a spy and thriving on disguises, Papa sure was bad at acting. He cradled Yor’s hand apprehensively in his, and the other came to rest at the middle of her back. Yor, in turn, laid her hand against his shoulder, lips spreading into an awkward smile. Mama might have handled the closeness better if she’d had time to chug wine.
“Thank you, B-bondman.”
While Mama and Papa began their initial steps, flustered and stumbling about, Anya began phase three of her mission. She tottled her way over to the radio, turned the little dial to increase the volume, and watched them closely for any major developments. Minutes passed and feet moved gracefully across the floor, blushes heated their faces, and smiles spread across pink lips. How could they not see what Anya saw? It was everything Becky had ever talked about in that stupid soap opey-ra she watched, down to the way she saw Papa looking in Mama’s eyes.
So, for the final (and most important ) part of her mission, Anya walked back into the living room, fists pressed proudly into her hips. She was determined to make them kiss, even if she had to press their heads together herself. As Papa dipped Mama low, she gave it her best shot, proclaiming loudly, “Now kiss!”
She really should have known they’d be quick to react, falling to the floor in their embarrassment.