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The blood dripping from Tsukishima's head was the first thing Koito noticed when he looked back over his shoulder. It slowly gathered in a pool beside him which seemed to expand so much that he looked like he could drown in it.
He was still breathing softly, a sharp wheeze sound he could faintly hear. Koito pushed himself up slowly, but he was so weak… so tired. The bomb has done more damage than it looked. Every muscle ached under the skin. He managed to turn himself around and crawl steadily towards Tsukishima's body.
"Tsu-Tsukishima..."
Tsukishima didn't respond. Koito gripped his arm tightly. Tsukishima's eyes were closed, but Koito could feel the pulse in his wrist, and see his chest rise and fall with every short and shallow breath.
Koito wanted to cry out or scream or do anything, but sit beside him and let his body get cold and numb. He gritted his teeth as he sat himself up in a sitting position beside the smaller man, ignoring his pain as he so often did.
"Tsukishima!" He gasped close to his ear.
---
"Hajime!" A small voice tickled Tsukishima's ear. He opened his eyes and he was met with a cool sea mist. A cliff view of the sea was in front of him, one that resembled his hometown. The waves were tumbling in and crashing on the rocky shore beneath him. He stood on the edge, ready to fall in at any moment, but he turned around in shock, instantly recognizing the owner of the voice.
"Chiyo" He whispered. She looked as beautiful as ever. She laughed and tucked a small strand of curly hair behind her ears. "What are you doing here?"
He doesn’t know why he didn’t ask how she was alive. Ever since speaking with Inkarmat, he had a feeling deep down that she always was. A feeling that Lieutenant Tsurumi did not lie to him. Or maybe it was just a fool’s hope.
"What do you mean? We are home, aren't we? You should come inside, lunch will be cold." Her voice was sweet and soft. Tsukishima felt light when he heard it, as if his heavy body no longer held any of its natural weight.
"W-what?"
"You're acting so funny, Hajime. Did you hit your head on something?" She teased.
"My head does hurt. Now that you mention it.” He lifted his arm to feel the back of his head, but there was nothing out of the ordinary, “I remember I got hit by something."
"Maybe you were daydreaming."
He stared at her hard, and his eyes got wide and he began to tear up uncontrollably.
"I missed you so much." He put his head down and tears began to pour from his eyes. He didn’t want to bridge the gap between them, for fear she may disappear forever.
"Hajime, my dear, it's only been a few minutes since I was out here with you. What's gotten into you?"
She walked over and moved her arms around him, and against his better judgment, he allowed her embrace. He wrapped his arms around her slowly to return the welcome warmth. His heart felt like it was going to burst out of his chest. He knew he didn't deserve it. This couldn't be his life. He wanted to feel happy but instead, he felt immense guilt for reasons he couldn't explain.
"This has to be a dream." he breathed.
"Does it?" She whispered. "You don't have to leave. You can stay here with me forever, Hajime."
"I don't deserve it." He cried, "I know I could never stay here. The place I'm going is much worse."
He had been so prepared to go to hell before, so ready to get that front row ticket, but now...seeing what he's missing...he wasn't quite sure.
The sudden harsh sound of a giant oncoming wave roared in the air. It had crept up the side of the rocks and quickly swept Chiyo from his arms. He watched in desperation as she disappeared, melting like sand into the sea. He yelled without realizing it. He could not allow himself to feel the pain of losing her once again. He jumped into the sea to swim after her, but there was no body to chase. No form or shadow to follow. It was as if she had never been there. Only darkness welcomed him here.
He dove under the surface, seeing nothing but inky waters. He heard a voice again next to him, but it was muffled as if the owner was gasping under the waves. He looked towards the deep and even with his blurry vision he saw someone there, struggling for life.
“Lieutenant Tsurumi!” he gasped underwater. The thought of being able to breathe, he did not even question. He watched as the man sunk into the dark abyss below, becoming smaller and smaller with time, and stretching his arms out to no escape. A wound inside his chest bleed out, and the water became a cold maroon. No matter how much Tsukishima fought the waves, he could not reach him. There was something holding him back and pulling him to the surface.
Tsukishima broke the waves, and a metallic smell filled the air around him. He turned and grabbed hold of the nearest rock to crawl upon, the waves pulling him down. Someone was there. They lifted him up by one arm and halfway out of the sinking sea.
"Tsukishimaaa!"
"Second Lieutenant Koito! I need to save Chiyo and Lieutenant Tsurumi!"
"Wake up! Tsukishima! You have to wake up or you'll die!" He gripped Tsukishima tightly like he was a lifeline. Despite his body mostly on the rocky land, he felt like both of them were floating.
"You need to get out of here, sir." He slurred his words. "The sea is going to take you too. It’s pulling me in now."
Koito, with all the strength he could bear, began to pull Tsukishima across the rocks, until his knees rested on land.
"Tsukishima...I can't do this alone! I'm not going anywhere."
Tsukishima jerked at the pull and his eyes opened to the image of reality. He was on the train. Not in his hometown. Not with Chiyoh on the rocks, or Lieutenant Tsurumi in the deep sea.
He was shaking, and everything was starting to become blurry. Koito was there though, he realized, just like in the dream.
"You're convulsing. J-Just listen to my voice! D-don't go..." The young man sounded so tired like he was struggling not to pass out himself.
Tsukishima stopped his convulsions, but his vision got a little darker. He looked to the side and realized Koito and the train floor were covered in blood, enough to make puddle splashes. His very own sea.
Something told him he wasn't going to last long, and whatever place he was about to see next wasn't going to be as pleasant as the last. Maybe he will get pulled to the sea again, and Koito won’t be there to save him.
"Do you think this was all worth it?"
"First Lieutenant Tsurumi has the deed. Your job is finished. You don't have to fight anymore. Y-you don't have to feel pain anymore."
Koito was crying, Tsukishima noticed. He looked so young when he cries. He shouldn't have to go through this, Tsukishima thought when his vision rested on the deep scar on Koito’s face. It would need stitches, he is sure of it.
"I'm sorry for lying to you."
"W-what?"
"If I could go back and fix some things I would." His voice was going, he could feel it. "I just think maybe your life could have been better. Lieutenant Koito…I don’t think I can stay awake for much longer."
"S-shut up! You don't get to talk about my life when you're the one who's dying! I'm exactly where I need to be. I may regret the way I got here, but this is where I belong." Koito took a deep breath and wiped his tears from his eyes, he grabbed Tsukishima's hand in his. He had an expression on his face of helplessness. He didn't know what to do. There was never anything he could do. Both of them made their choices, they would always lead here. "You're a good and loyal man, Tsukishima. You served First Lieutenant Tsurumi better than anyone could. I am…glad to call you my dearest friend. I won't let anything you did be in vain.”
Tsukishima could tell he meant it.
Koito’s hand felt warm, like Chiyo’s embrace had. Tsukishima smiled, despite himself. He was glad there was one person by his side who really cared for him. Tsukishima wanted to say more, but his throat was starting to fill with blood. Instead, he squeezed Koito’s hand one last time, hoping he could convey that thankfulness.
His vision dimmed, and he closed his eyes, submitting himself to the sea.