Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

As Amity enters adulthood and the start of her adult education, she realizes just how little control she has over her life. Of course, she should have known this from the start, growing up in an affluent family comes with its perks of connection, wealth, opportunity, and safety in the Blight namesake, but this also bleeds into nearly every aspect of her life, just short of the clothes she wears. With this in mind, she is admitted into Hexside University likely from the hand of her own mother’s influence, and is signed up as a Fluid Mechanics major in the shadow of her father. All of this she was unaware of until after the fact, and she doesn’t know if she can be upset because why wouldn’t her mom try to define every part of her life?

Independence comes at a huge cost as a Blight. 

She tries really hard not to think about whether or not that bothers her, though (it does). 

Of course, like most first year students, she really wants to live on campus in the dorms, but finds that her idea is shut down just seconds after she musters up the courage to mention it to her mom. And so, she ends up living in a huge three bedroom apartment with her childhood friends Boscha and Skara just a street away from campus. Her mom referencing that the arrangements made for Amity is based on “stellar views and no distractions” and that Boscha and Skara are probably some of the only few people Odalia trusts to not “corrupt” her, whatever that means. 

Amity hates that she’s beholden to her parents, who are paying for the apartment she lives in, but she knows she doesn’t really have a choice. And if she’s really honest with herself, she definitely knows she has very little ideas around what it means to be an adult when she’s had everything paid for her entire life, including a wealth of servants, tutors and mentors who have helped her along the way. As much as she wants to rebel and just fuck off in her own way at college, she isn’t brave, nor is she just the right amount of smart to do that. So she does what she does best in moments like these, she’s complacent. 

Amity hopes to find some kind of independence in her apartment though, as this would be the first time she’s really away from her family. Her twin siblings have gone off to college what feels like ages ago and came back a different type of rambunctious asshole than what Amity was used to, and she’d like to have some semblance of a fancy development arc like Edric and Emira (or at least, she can dream it). It intrigues her but scares her at the same time. So, all in all the newfound privacy sounds like a godsend that she wants all to herself. And still, despite nearly everyone in her hometown going to Hexside University, she expects things to be different.

Moving in is relatively smooth overall, and she does her best to grab as many boxes of stuff from her old room as she can. The apartment itself was pre-furnished (Thanks, Mom.) with the exception of her room decorations and toiletries. Amity opts for some posters, photos and individual touches, such as her collection of semi read books and knick knacks all around the room. While it doesn’t feel like home initially, she hopes that the space itself will grow on her with time.

Having some time before the semester starts, Amity does her best to prepare for the new year. No amount of trying to be cool about college can break that she was top of her class all throughout high school and that anxiety and stress are second nature to her. She ends up pulling open her laptop on the weekend before class to check up on her schedule. She finds comfort in knowing what to look for and expect.

Amity groans after looking at what will soon to be her schedule at Hexside University, “What the fuck is basic art doing on my schedule?” Amity says while falling back on the headboard of her bed, a slight creak echoing as she does so. She rolls her eyes before looking at Boscha, who sits in the living room just outside of her room who Amity can just barely see in eyeshot. 

Boscha laughs at Amity’s expense, before shutting her own laptop and saying “Didn’t your mom sign you up for classes? I know mine did.” 

Amity groans again, saying, “Yes, and she insists on making my life a living hell every chance she gets.”

Boscha walks into Amity’s room and takes a seat unceremoniously on Amity’s bed, the sheets dipping where she sits, “At least you can fuck around in that class, and who knows, maybe you’ll meet someone cute.” Boscha makes her point, then immediately starts scrolling through her phone. 

“Ugh, I doubt it. It’ll be full of art dorks and losers with no social lives.” She kinda hopes she's wrong about that one, but would never actually admit that to Boscha.

Boscha scoffs, looking up from her phone at Amity to say, “Whatever, just let me know when you’re done moping and we can get dinner or something. It’s the weekend before classes and I don’t want to be cooped up here, we’ve been here for, what? 3 days having to unpack and shit. I’m going insane.” She gets up, “Lemme text Skara and see where she’s at.”

With that, Boscha leaves Amity to her own devices for what is probably the first time this weekend. Amity’s social battery is already at zero before Boscha texted Skara, and she wants to mope until classes start if she’s honest. Still, she manages to close her laptop and walk to the vanity for a poor attempt to do her makeup. She already has eyebags and a seething headache, but she manages to put on eyeliner and shadow to mask some of her exhaustion. She opts for darker tones and gets dressed in a casual black sundress, her light green hair contrasting both her skin and overall look.

When she is somewhat happy with her look she meanders to the living room, which is filled with stacked boxes and random items strewn around, not fully organized. Amity sits on the couch and hears Boscha’s music blasting, assuming that she is likely getting ready. Amity checks her phone to find messages from her siblings.

[9:35pm] Em✨: How’s our baby sis doing?   

[9:36pm] Ed💫 : lol are u dead yet

[9:36pm] Amity: Classes haven’t started but I’m already tired asf

[9:38pm] Ed💫 : what are u studying again? i already forgot

[9:38pm] Amity: Fluid mechanics

[9:40pm] Ed💫 : oh good fucking luck having a life

[9:42pm] Em✨ : LOL don’t be cruel she’ll have some time, it’s her freshman year

[9:43pm] Em✨ : Besides it’s not like she has many friends 😂

[9:45pm] Amity: if you both texted me just to roast me you could have just texted each other 

[9:46pm] Ed💫 : but this is more fun mittens lol

Amity rolls her eyes at the last message and shuts off her phone, before Boscha walks out of her room. Amity jumps slightly after seeing her, not fully realizing that Boscha’s music shut off minutes ago. “Oh cute, you’re all ready. Skara is sending me deets soon, so we can start walking towards campus.”

With that, Amity and Boscha walk close to campus to meet up with Skara and her boyfriend, who is a Sophomore and hosting some welcome party for his friends and incoming freshman. When they arrive, music can be heard bumping outside of the house, the air feels thick and lots of people can be seen coming in and out of the building. Skara is standing outside waving when she sees Amity and Boscha, “Yes!!!! You made it!!! And you both look great. This is Matty, but everyone calls him Batty.” She gestures to her boyfriend and Amity gives a little wave; she already feels out of her element, and a bit anxious.

It’s weird, because as she listens to Skara, the same anxiety she gets from her parents' networking events bubbles to the surface. But this isn’t nearly the same thing, right? Get it together. she thinks to herself before tuning back into Skara speaking, who’s talking about all the really important people who are here, apparently. Amity wishes she cared more, but she’s exhausted and realizes they aren’t actually going out to eat like Boscha had said they were. She’s fucking hungry.

They eventually head inside and the air indeed is thick, it’s dark, and it smells like a lot of different bodies. There’s a bar set up by the kitchen with one lone person handling everything, Amity thinks they no doubt look overwhelmed. Still, she ends up breaking from her friends and wanders over to the bar, not really sure what to do next. “What do you want?” the makeshift bartender says, somewhat loudly over the blaring music. 

Right. Amity walked to the bar, so Amity must drink right? Except, she’s only had drinks at her parents' events and when Boscha snuck some in at school, but she doesn’t know shit about alcohol or what to order. She thinks quickly on her feet and puts on the charm when she says “How about you just give me your favorite drink?” Nailed it.  

“Hell yeah, you got it.” When the words come out of the bartender’s mouth, Amity realizes her request must’ve come off way more flirty than she intended because the bartender keeps staring at her as he makes the drink and she immediately feels anxiety. To mitigate some of her nerves she scrolls aimlessly through her phone before the dude gets her attention, handing her a red solo cup. “Try not to be a stranger.” He says with a wink as she takes the drink from him.

Amity mumbles thanks as she heads back into the crowd of people in search of her friends. Fucking ew. She thinks to herself before taking a sip out of the red cup she was given Double fucking ew this tastes like shit . The drink itself is likely 90% alcohol and a hint of something fruity and neon red. She thinks about how if this is his favorite drink then he must be fucking psychotic. 

Amity watches the crowd of people dancing and mingling before she fully steps in the swarm of people in search for Boscha or Skara, at least. She made the mistake of not actually letting them know where she was going before leaving them, but she uses this as an opportunity to watch people interact around her. At least, that’s what she thought she’d do before random people aimlessly try to get her attention as she walks through the crowd. People end up nameless and nearly faceless after a while, and she more or less realizes she just honestly doesn’t care to meet people this way.

Amity finishes her drink before seeing a random person handing out beers. Feeling brave, she grabs a couple before weaving herself back into what looks like the living room of the house. She scans the room before seeing Boscha and some random people talking to each other. Boscha ends up eyeing Amity and calls her over through the crowd. “Hey! Everyone, this is Amity, the person I was talking about earlier! She’s cool.” Amity smiles awkwardly before being pulled into the crowd next to Boscha. “Where did you run off too? I turned around and you were totally gone!”

Amity smiles, feeling a bit warm from the alcohol, “To be honest, just a whole lot of people watching and shitty drinking.” The crowd of people laugh at her response, and though she’s not sure why, she giggles along with them. “What’s up with you?”

“Just hanging out with some really cool people. Clyde, Rachel and Atticus are all going into engineering so we all kinda have a lot in common.” Boscha says, her tone excited. Amity knows the look on her face and recognizes it as the same face her mom makes when there’s an opportunity for her. It’s sad really, when she thinks about it, but she plays nice for Boscha’s sake.

“Yeah, I’m kinda more of a physics girl but it seems like there’s a lot of overlap.” Amity smiles and looks at Boscha, “I’m glad you’re having fun.” 

They stand around and talk for a long time, with Amity extending pleasantries and asking as many questions as she can possibly muster without fully committing to the conversation. The alcohol makes it easier to talk when she doesn’t really care, which she’s thankful for. Boscha eventually excuses the two of them to talk outside, referencing something that Amity totally doesn’t remember.

Once outside the party house, they find a quiet patch of lawn to talk on. Things are getting a bit fuzzy for Amity at this point as she’s had plenty of Alcohol and lost all of her ability to have a filter. Boscha looks at her and her face reads as something in between hurt and anger. “Why the fuck did you highjack that conversation, Amity?”

Amity is kind of stunned when she hears Boscha say that, as she thought she was being kind and just…. having a conversation. She’s never really been good at perceiving herself. “I thought you wanted me to be a part of the conversation, I literally was people watching before you called me over.”

Boscha scoffs, “Yeah, I called you over because I thought you were gonna be cool with them, but I totally turned into a shadow next to you.” 

“How is that my fault? I thought I was just having a conversation with your new friends.” Amity seers, feeling herself getting angry, “I didn’t even want to come to this party.”

“And that’s the problem! You don’t even care that you made me look like an ass.” Boscha gestures, “Ugh, Em and Ed were right about you.”

Amity starts to see red when she sighs and raises her voice a bit, “What the fuck did Em and Ed say?” No doubt emboldened by the alcohol. 

“That you don’t know when to stop talking and that you make everything about yourself.” Boscha scoffs, “The fact that I have to tell you this at all is irritating.”

Amity knows Boscha is projecting and that it’s not even worth it to fight. She’s hurt by Em and Ed’s words but what does she expect? They’ve always been like this. They cut to the core without a care most of the time. “Oh fuck off, I’m done with this conversation.” Amity says, walking away and out into the streets away from the party. She hears Boscha yelling at her but she can’t really make out the words, and frankly, she doesn’t really care. That seems like the theme for the night.

Amity walks out into the night relishing in the moonlight and easy breeze. She doesn’t really know where she’s going but it feels good just to be out. Amity at least knows she’s near campus, so she ends up following bright lights ahead, which she can only assume is some academic building or something. She ends up walking to a park at the edge of campus, surrounded by countless trees and benches. The grass has a dewy mist blanketing the ground.

Amity finds a bench to sit on next to an aloe vera bush and a really bright streetlamp. She pulls out her phone to find it reads 12:34am. She doesn't realize how much time has passed but she sees she has 3 messages all from Ed and Em. 

[11:56pm] Em✨ : Heard you went to a party and got sloshed tell us all abt it yeah?

[11:58pm] Ed💫 ️: dont have too much fun w out us?

[11:58pm] Em✨ : or do 😈

Amity rolls her eyes and her shoulders at the messages. Of course they know. She sighs into the air, not really expecting things to feel better but also not wanting to go home because that means possibly facing Boscha, who’s the last person she wants to see right now. Just when she contemplates moving and starting her trek back home, she sees a figure approaching.

“Hey, uh, so I never do this and I promise I'm not a creep, but I found a wallet on the ground and I think it’s yours?” the voice says before stepping more into the light. A friendly-ish face (at least that’s how Amity perceives it) says, “At least, you look like the person in the ID. Who knows, maybe you have a twin?”

Amity laughs and pats the pockets of her dress, “Funny enough I am not a twin but I do have siblings that are twins.” After feeling her empty pockets she says, “God, I didn’t even notice, you’re a fucking lifesaver.” Amity groans, “This night has been a nightmare.”

The person laughs before handing over Amity’s wallet, a black wallet with an anime cat on the top. “What a funny coincidence. No personal twin, but also twins?” Amity takes the wallet and gets a better look at the person’s face. They look pretty young, brown hair, medium-toned skin and hazel-ish eyes. She looks pretty tired and she’s wearing a color block hoodie and black leggings. “A Nightmare though? I’d hate to just leave you without at least asking if you’re okay.” Creep? Not checked. Weirdo? Possibly checked. Amity isn’t sure.

“Ugh. Yeah it’s, uh, been a night. I just moved into an apartment with my friends who I’ve known since, like, middle school. We went to a party tonight and we got into a fight about something so fucking stupid. I also just literally wanted food and they took me to a party instead and I'm just buzzed in the middle of a random park next to a random stranger and my god you didn’t ask for all of this.” Amity says putting her face into her hands, embarrassed about unloading onto the person standing in front of her.

“Well.” The figure puts their arm outstretched as if to shake hands with Amity but her arm kinda lingers awkwardly before Amity fully realizes what she’s doing. “I’m Luz.” Amity shakes Luz’s hand, while Luz says “Now we aren’t strangers anymore.” Luz smiles warmly, “Besides, I literally asked.”

The gesture is really sweet. “I’m Amity.”

“So Amity , I know it’s like…” Luz looks at an invisible watch on her wrist, “Late, but you said you haven’t eaten and I was totally on my way to get fast food and if you wanted to come with you’re more than welcome.” Luz smiles, “It’s not too far from here.”

Amity takes a short look at her phone before answering to see a preview of a text from Boscha before responding to Luz faster than she can fully think about the decision, “Yes please.” Amity pushes herself off of the bench and says “Lead the way, Luz.”

Luz giggles before skip-walking through the park as they head to a burger shack just down the street. Amity’s never been, but Luz doesn’t stop talking about how bomb their food is. It’s during their walk that Amity learns that Luz is also a first year student, except she lives in one of the dorms nearby. Luz is really good at talking and filling the space and generally making sure Amity isn’t feeling too awkward, and while Amity can’t read if she’s doing it out of nervousness, or that’s just who she is, Amity is really grateful because she is so exhausted she just doesn’t know what to say. They shortly arrive at the fast food joint, and Amity realizes she’s never been here before, which in itself is a bit overwhelming. 

Amity feels herself getting lost in their menu and reading what they have when Luz lightly elbows her, “It’s kind of a lot, but you can’t go wrong with nuggets and some fries.” She smiles before stepping up and ordering something herself. Amity wonders how much of her anxiety is on her face to make Luz say something semi comforting about that.

Amity walks up and indeed orders nuggets and fries, and the two of them wait until their numbers are called. Amity uses the lull in this moment to check on her phone finally. 1:12am. Ugh, she should reply to Boscha for her own sanity.

[12:26am] Boscha💅 : Amity

[1:00am] Boscha💅 : lmk when u get home i’m worrriedd

[1:05am] Boscha💅 : at least text me so i know ur not dead

[1:10am] Boscha💅 : ur mom is going to kill me if ur missing

It’s 1:15am when Amity decides to reply, clearly Boscha is anxious

[1:15am] Amity: Not dead, met someone and just getting food, be home soon. 

[1:15am] Boscha💅 : 👀

Amity rolls her eyes, sighing out when Luz interrupts her looking at her phone. She sees that her new friend is holding two bags. “I know it looks like I'm a food goblin, but you looked a bit busy on your phone, and didn’t really hear them call your number so I went ahead and just picked it up for ya.” Luz drops the bag next to Amity, “We can eat here, I can walk you home, whatever works for you.” 

“Hm.” Amity truly ponders eating here but the thought of being ugly in her bed and eating nuggets with netflix sounds utterly amazing, “If that’s alright with you, I honestly want to be in bed right now.” Amity feels herself blushing in embarrassment after realizing how that probably came off to Luz. “Oh god, totally not what I meant, sorry, I'm just tired.”

Luz smiles, “You don’t have to apologize, it’s clearly been a long night.” Luz gestures for Amity to get up, “You said you live like a street away from campus right? I’ll walk you.”

“You’ve been more of a help to me tonight than anything you really don’t have to if you don’t want to.” Amity means that, feeling guilty about how hospitable Luz has been. She isn’t used to someone being so nice to her, she’s almost waiting for the other shoe to drop.

Luz laughs before extending a pinky, “I promise that I want to. Also you looked really sad after looking at your phone and we can’t have you walking home alone after that.”

Amity realizes how observant Luz must be to notice all the small details nearly everyone else overlooks. It intrigues her, and she says, “Thanks, Luz. You’re a really great person.” She stares a bit too long at Luz before interrupting herself and pulling up the map on her phone, “Looks like you’re stuck with me for about 7 minutes, I live this way.” Amity points in the direction of her apartment.

It’s then that Luz says “Lead the way, Amity.”

Luz starts munching on her fries the second they start walking the streets to Amity’s place, “God I was so hungry, Amity. When hunger calls, how can you deny her?”

Amity laughs, Dork? Check. A correct dork, though. “I don’t even know what I would’ve gotten if it weren’t for you.” She smiles as she checks her map making sure they’re walking the right way, “Are you normally up around this time hitting up strangers in the park?”

Luz laughs, half choking on a french fry, “Yep all the time, Amity.” She seems to finish up what is in her mouth before replying, “On the real, strangers no , food and generally being up around this time, yes . One of my moms has an autoimmune disease and I usually stayed up to take care of her and make sure she’s ok. She’s kind of a night owl, though, and now it’s more or less a habit that I don’t know if I can break.” 

The answer is a bit more honest than Amity expects, “Hey, I’m sorry to hear about your mom. I hope everything is okay.”

“Oh, yeah! She’s been doing so much better recently, which is why I felt okay to live on campus. And, if i’m being honest, she’d tell you not to worry. She’s one of the strongest people I know.” Luz smiles from ear to ear. Amity thinks it’s great to see how much love she has for her mom.

“She sounds like a really cool person, Luz.” Amity smiles, looking back at Luz, “Two moms, you’re the first person I know who has that.”

Luz starts laughing, waving one of her hands, “Oh no, they’re not together.” Luz looks like she’s thinking when she says, “Although one time in middle school I thought they could . Knowing them as long as I have now, they would probably eat each other alive.” Luz takes another bite of fries from the seemingly endless bag she carries, “Eda is a mentor I had met in middle school, I call her my mom because she’s supported me throughout my life like one.”

“That sounds really nice, Luz. You seem to have a lot of powerful, inspiring women in your life.” Amity says but realizes it pains her when she briefly thinks about her own Mother. She looks down at her phone and realizes they’ve just made it to her building.

Luz smiles and stops walking when Amity stops, “I do.” Luz then shuffles her feet awkwardly, “So… I can only assume this is your apartment building? We made it!”

Amity looks up at the large 20-story building before saying “Yes! Thank you so much, Luz. I really don’t know what I would’ve done without you.” Amity almost doesn’t want to leave but her logical brain tells her she needs to sleep.

“Probably not have some amazing food and good company,” Luz winks and Amity feels herself blushing a bit. Why? Why is that her body’s reaction?  

“You’re probably right. Thanks for um. Making my night.” She extends her pinky out when she realizes she never closed the loop back at the burger shack.

Luz extends her pinky back and they lock their fingers, lingering for a moment. “Right back at ya. I hope you have a nice night Amity, enjoy your food.” 

“Thanks. I will.” Amity says smiling, “You’ll be alright getting back to your place, right?”

Luz starts waving her hand nonchalantly, “Oh! totally, I think I’ll call my mom on the way home. No doubt she’s up.” Amity’s not sure which one.

With that, they wave each other off and Amity smiles the whole ride back from up the elevator and into her apartment. She sneaks in as quietly as she can to avoid Boscha, who seems to be knocked out because she can’t hear a thing coming from her room. Skara’s door is also closed and she thanks the stars that she can enjoy her meal in peace. 

Amity sets her meal up on her bed, something that feels rebellious as she never could do this back at home, and snaps a quick picture. Not only does she want to remember one of her first nights in her own apartment, she sillily thinks of sending it to Luz, wanting to thank her again. She scrolls through her phone only to realize she never asked for Luz’s number or any socials. 

She groans a bit too loudly while falling back on her bed. Amity silently mulls over the fact that she didn’t even think to ask for it at any point throughout the night. In an act of desperation she pulls out her phone and tries to search Luz up on Instagram. Her name seems unique enough for something to pop up, besides, It also wouldn’t be out of the realm of possibility to have mutuals, right?

She spends a good 20 minutes of her night trying to find Luz to no avail while she finishes up her meal. She can’t help but feel like she’s missing out on a really cool person, but who knows, maybe this was one of those weird once in a lifetime chance meets and she was supposed to just relish it for what it was?

Amity ends up wolfing down the rest of her dinner and tries to fall asleep before the anxiety of tomorrow and her incoming classes kick in. She ends up dozing off to the sound of an ambient nature documentary speaking on the summer migration pattern of some animal she doesn’t recognize.

Before falling asleep fully, Amity wonders how the rest of Luz’s night went, and if Amity was on her mind too.

Chapter Text

Amity awakes the following morning to the sound of music and the smell of something cooking in the apartment. She slept well overall but forgot to change out of her outfit from last night, which sticks to her in uncomfortable ways as she adjusts back into the land of the living. She groans, realizing she would have to face reality today and talk to Boscha when all she wants to do is sleep and watch Netflix and have 0 interaction whatsoever. 

As she gets ready in her bathroom, she can’t help wondering if she dreamt all of last night and if Luz was even a real person. She was drunk, she could have made that up, right? Amity splashes water on her face and takes a look at herself in the mirror. The person looking back at her is clearly tired but she does her best to smile and give herself a mini pep talk.

“You can do this. You can talk to Boscha. She’s just going to apologize and you can both just smooth things over.” Amity takes her hands and pats her cheeks a little, “It’s not going to go like last time where she stopped talking to you for a month.”

Amity doesn’t even want to think about starting her first semester in college on Boscha’s bad side. It’s weird, they have both known each other for so long, and Amity can’t help but feel they are trains running alongside one another but their tracks never truly intersect. Amity tries to stay as close as she can from far away (she swears it makes more sense in her head), and because Boscha is one of the few friends she has, she doesn’t really want to jeopardize that.

Amity spends some time getting ready for the day by getting dressed in a big crewneck Sailor Moon sweater and random shorts. She pulls out her phone to see that Ed and Em have, yet again, spammed her phone.

[10:45am] Ed ️💫: Hey mittens are you alive

[10:52am] Em✨ : She better be, the semester hasn’t even started yet 😂

[10:52am] Ed ️💫: Wouldn’t put it past her tbh 

[10:53am] Amity: i’m alive, I just had a rly long night 😩

[10:54am] Em✨ : Big Bad Boscha told us you met someone? 

[10:54am] Ed💫 : 👀👀👀

Amity scoffs before replying.

[10:55am] Amity: Did Boscha also tell you she got mad at me for a stupid reason lol

[10:55am] Amity: If not you might want to recheck your source

[10:56am] Ed ️💫: she didn’t 🥶🥶🥶🥶

[10:57am] Em✨ : Ok but you didn’t answer the question lol

Amity rolls her eyes and decides to end the text thread there. She’s not indulging in something that literally barely happened and with someone she has no way of contacting. She can’t shake the feeling that she’ll be having this conversation again later with Boscha. Ugh.

Amity ends up opening the door from her bedroom into the living room and sees Skara eating the remnants of breakfast. She looks deep in thought before looking up shortly after Amity opens her door. “Oh hey Amity!” Skara smiles before saying, “I tried knocking on your door earlier to see if you wanted breakfast…. But it seems like you were like, mega asleep, so I just kinda left it. There’s some extra stuff I made on the stove though if you’re hungry.”

Amity smiles, the thought is really sweet, “Thanks Skara.” Amity pulls the chair in front of Skara across the table and sits down, “How was the rest of your night, I feel like I just didn’t see you at all?”

“It was fun! Batty’s friends are cool and it’s finally nice to meet them now that we’re at college together and everything.” Skara’s smile drops a bit, “Boscha told me you weren’t having fun though?” Amity sighs at Boscha’s name before rubbing her eyes.

“That’s not it. Skara, I had fun, I was having a decent time, and I met some people Boscha was with, and Boscha didn’t like that I was talking more than she was so we got into a fight about it.” Amity looks at Skara, “I promise you did nothing wrong inviting us out. It was really nice to meet Batty, honestly.” Amity means that, and she realizes she had never even considered this was Skara’s event alongside her boyfriend. She feels like an asshole.

“I’m glad you had fun Amity, I know it’s not really your scene, so I’m glad you showed up.” Skara pushes around some eggs on her plate, hesitating, “You know? You’re not wrong for standing up to Boscha, she sounds like she was being mega fucking insecure last night.”

“I tried not to take it personally but it definitely ruined my night.” Amity groans, leaning back into her seat before staring at the ceiling. She thinks of Luz really briefly.

“She’ll come around when she’s ready to apologize. You know how she is, it takes her like 14 business days to admit she’s wrong.” Skara starts laughing and Amity can’t help but chuckle at the comment. It’s so fucking true. “Did you end up coming home after your fight?”

Amity’s heart kinda stops for a moment out of nerves. Literally why is this happening? “Um, no actually, I walked around campus for a bit and didn’t realize I lost my wallet sometime on the walk. A kind stranger saw me and gave it back, thinking it was mine.” Amity feels herself smiling, “They um, walked me to get food then walked me back to the apartment.” 

Skara is staring at Amity, one eyebrow raised, “And you totally got his number right?” Oh god. Amity’s heart kind of drops at her comment.

“No, I completely forgot in all honesty. It was just a really nice time. It definitely made up for the shitty night I was having up until that point.”

Skara is smiling after listening to Amity, “Bummer, well, I'm sure with how you met, you’ll cross paths again soon. Just make sure you get his number next time, he sounds like a sweetheart; those are hard to come by.” Skara says, swirling her fork in front of Amity.

“Yeah I will, thanks Skara.” Amity smiles and pushes herself out of her chair, thinking of the easiest way to excuse herself, “I think I gotta call my mom and then get ready for classes tomorrow. Text me if you’re trying to get dinner or want to hang out, ok?”

Skara nods in understanding when Amity heads back into her room to try and compose herself. She couldn’t help but linger on the words “He” when Skara spoke about Luz. She’s not sure why, but everything about this situation feels wrong, and she just wants to not be bothered by Skara’s words. 

Before she lets herself spiral too much on her feelings to really process them, she gets up and spends most of her day preparing for tomorrow’s classes. If she wants to succeed in college, she tells herself that she needs to stop worrying about a stranger, and worse, Boscha. So Amity prepares her notebooks and gets her bearings on a map of campus. Amity feels herself getting anxious as she looks at her schedule again to see that most of her classes are later in the week but that a basic physics and her drawing class are sometime tomorrow afternoon.

Amity feels clueless about preparation for her Drawing class, and in an act of desperation, she searches “what to bring to art class” in google in like 16 different ways (thanks, anxiety) before she realizes she’s in the exact same place before she decided to search. Just as she’s about to give up, she gets a notification on Instagram that she doesn’t recognize, a follow request from none other than Luz herself.

Oh god. This is like the worst (best) possible scenario she can think of. Confirmation that Luz had indeed done the same thing she was doing the night before, but had way more guts and courage to actually find Amity. Unusual for her, she finds herself happy at the notification but is way too anxious to do anything about it. Amity ends up silencing her phone completely and chucks it under the bed for the time being before she lays on the floor contemplating her navel and groaning at the experience of being human.

Eventually she knows she’ll have to deal with this, but she accepts that right now she’s just not ready, and that if she can’t even handle the thought of school right now, anything else would be entirely too much.

Amity ends up making her way back into the living room where she finds Skara again, this time Amity asks if she wants to watch a movie to calm her nerves. Boscha still appears to be out when they start, which Amity is honestly really thankful for, as she doesn’t think she can handle too deep of a conversation right now. Skara makes popcorn for the two of them while Amity picks Howl’s Moving Castle for them to watch, something that the two of them (not so secretly) really enjoy. Skara swoons when she sees Master Howl on screen, and Amity, who sits on the other end of the couch, would never admit that her heart skips a beat when young Sophie shows her face throughout the movie.

The movie itself is all kinds of sweet and romantic and courageous. Something Amity wants to think about throughout the rest of her night. Prior to the movie actually ending, Boscha makes her way loudly back into the apartment saying, “I see two dorks taking up precious real estate on the couch.” She laughs, “I’m having people over soon so like, whatever you’re both doing,” Boscha looks at the TV to see a still of the movie, waving her hand dramatically, “be done with it.”

How irritating. And as much as Amity wants to finish the movie, she doesn’t want to be in a room with Boscha any longer than she needs to and she REALLY doesn’t want to talk to her. Amity turns to Skara and says, “We can finish this later, I kinda don’t wanna be around when her friends get here.” Skara nods in understanding before putting a gentle hand on Amity’s shoulder. Amity rushes to the pantry to grab dinner so she doesn’t have an excuse to come back into the living room later tonight. And because she’s still kinda grasping the whole no-servants-so-dinner-is-on-her kinda thing, she grabs some tortilla chips and salsa from the kitchen.

Amity makes it back into her room unscathed, and she immediately remembers her phone is under the bed. After putting her food on the nightstand, she reaches down and grabs her phone, unsure of exactly what she wants when she turns it off silent.

2 messages on instagram and 1 text from her mom.

[9:00pm] Mom: Be prompt to classes tomorrow and no distractions, Amity. Your education is a huge opportunity for you. Don’t blow it.

Amity rolls her eyes and lazily heart reacts the message because just what the fuck is she supposed to respond to that? Almost in an act of immediate rebellion to the “no distractions” comment, Amity opens up instagram.

[6:25pm] Luz: I promise i’m not a creep! Just wanted to make sure you were ok after last night

[8:37pm] Luz: Here’s my number in case you need it, we are friends now! 

Amity smiles wide at both of the messages before realizing she’s in a trance. She can barely comprehend how someone is just this nice. Amity thumbs the number into her contacts and saves the number under “Luz 🤗”. The emoji she puts is arbitrary, right? Amity takes a deep breath before making several attempts to send a message to Luz.

[9:47pm] Amity: Hey it’s me—

Too casual, DELETE 

[9:48pm] Amity: Thanks for checking in on—

Too much emotion, DELETE

[9:50pm] Amity: How are you so nice—

Too weird, DELETE

[9:52pm] Amity: It’s Amity! Sorry I was watching a movie and just wanted to say hi.

It’s the right amount of vague and something she feels safe sending.

[9:55pm] Luz🤗 : Hi! You can text me anytime! 😲😲😲😲😲😲 what movie?????

[9:56pm] Amity: Howls Moving Castle. My first time watching, but my friend Skara and I couldn’t finish bc ✨ angry roommate✨ came back 

Luz texts back immediately, and Amity can almost hear what she remembers to be Luz’s voice say her texts out loud.

[9:56pm] Luz🤗 : THAT MOVIE IS SO GOOD 🤘

[9:57pm] Luz🤗 : You have gr8 taste, what if one of these days we finish the rest of the movie to spite your monster roommate 👹👹👹

[9:58pm] Amity: lol i’ll have to take you up on that, it would actually be rly fun

Amity likes the idea of hanging out with Luz more. If this is what her mom thinks is a distraction, she’s all for it.

[9:59pm] Amity: im not surprised you’re up considering yesterday, but how are you doing? 

[10:01pm] Luz 🤗: rly good!!!! 🦉  all ready for classes tomorrow 🤞

[10:02pm] Luz🤗 : at least i think i am LOL

Amity realizes she doesn’t know what major Luz is or what types of classes she’ll be in. 

[10:03pm] Amity: I’m glad you’re doing good! 😌  what major are you?

[10:04pm] Luz🤗 : Its a long title but i’m studying History w an emphasis in Magic in Western Worldviews

Whoa. 

[10:04pm] Luz🤗 : What abt you?

[10:05pm] Amity: totally opposite, Fluid Mechanics

[10:06pm] Luz🤗 : omg are u gonna crush me with your big brain 🧠

Amity laughs, eyes glued to the last text Luz sent.

[10:08pm] Amity: I’ll try not to

Amity almost messages “don’t cast a spell on me” but finds herself too nervous to actually hit send; and frankly, might be too much for someone she only met a day ago.

She shakes the thought away and realizes she probably needs to start getting ready for bed because her first batch of classes are tomorrow anyway. As annoying and frustrating her mom is, she’s right, she does need to at least be semi-prepared for this opportunity.

[10:10pm] Amity: As much as i like talking to u i have to at least try to sleep

[10:11pm] Amity: classes and all 😢

[10:12pm] Luz🤗 : u like talking to me? 🥺

Amity freezes at the last text, not really sure how to interpret Luz’s tone. She wants to reply but she’s not really sure what to say, because she fears if she’s honest it might be too much for Luz. 

[10:13pm] Luz🤗 : cuz I like talking to you

Amity smiles at the chain of texts while bringing the phone to her face smacking the screen lightly at her forehead. She lets out a sigh to the quiet room before replying to Luz. 

[10:18pm] Amity: i do

[10:19pm] Amity: talk soon? 

[10:19pm] Luz🤗 : yes pls! goodnight!!! 😊

With that, Amity heart reacts to Luz’s last text and gets ready for bed. She feels totally prepared and unprepared for classes when she finds herself falling asleep.

———

The next morning is not eventful in the slightest beyond Amity being filled to the brim with anxiety. As a result, she leaves her apartment rather early so she has time to aimlessly walk on campus until she reaches her first lecture hall for her Physics 142 class, the Foundation of Modern Physics. The class itself is ok so far, with the professor mainly going over the syllabus, consisting of which books she needs to get, and what projects she can expect over the first semester. Thankfully this is one of the more basic physics classes she is taking in her first year because it already seems so difficult she can’t imagine taking more. After sitting in the lecture hall for an hour and a half absorbing introductory information; the “why” of the class, she takes a look at her phone. 2 messages.

[11:35am] Em✨ : good luck out there mittens! you got this

[11:40am] Ed ️💫: oh shoot, classes are today????? woo! 

Amity smiles at all the messages as the lecture finishes up. She thanks Ed and Em for actually being sweet for once, and that class seems tough already but that she’s up for the challenge. She feels better now that her first class is over and the most immediate anxiety she has about classes dissipates. 

Before heading to her next class she decides to get lunch at some place on campus, The Phoenix Grill, she thinks it’s called. Amity orders a burrito and no doubt does more people watching, something she finds comes easy to her since she is so often caught up in her thoughts. It seems the chaotic-ness of day one seems to be ripe in the air. 

She pulls out her phone and messages Luz.

[1:35pm] Amity: How’s your day going?

[1:36pm] Luz🤗 : Omg hi.

[1:37pm] Luz🤗 : Good!!!!! Me and my dorm mates got lost on campus so i think i’m gonna be late to my next class lol 😩😓😓😓😓

[1:38pm] Luz🤗 : curse these legs for not walking faster

[1:40pm] Amity: Use your magic knowledge to grow new legs 🦵

[1:41pm] Luz🤗 : shhh don’t tell anyone my secret

The text makes Amity smile but she feels a bit too caught up in needing to get to class to reply. Her Basic Drawing class is next and she feels like she’s about to be totally out of her element. The last time she remembers truly drawing was when she was 14 drawing mythical creatures and wizards based on fantasy novels at the time. When her mom found out about her artistic endeavors, Odalia diligently and completely got rid of every fantasy and fiction book in the house, essentially barring Amity from reading anything that cultivated her imagination in a way that threatened their family’s business. She often looks back on that time with sadness as she stopped drawing so abruptly and suddenly, not fully understanding what she was doing wrong. Her mom signing her up for Basic Art feels like some cruel sick joke.

She gets to class with a few minutes to spare at a semi large studio space with large desks. It seems like the bulk of students have already arrived, none of whom she actually recognizes besides maybe passively, but she can’t quite put her finger on where she knows them from. Amity chooses a table in the back because she knows herself and being in the front sounds a bit too intimidating, anyway. And much like her previous class that day, the professor goes over the syllabus in excruciating detail. 

Just as she starts to get a grip on the syllabus and mentally organize which supplies she’ll no doubt need to get, a student walks in late and loudly, “SORRY TEACH.” 

Wait, Amity recognizes that voice—

She turns to watch Luz stumble more or less in the studio and scan the room. While the introduction is not graceful at all, Luz does a pretty good job at playing it off. The professor seems to sigh and resume their introductory lecture, not bothering to fuss about Luz’s grand entrance. Amity watches Luz as she tiptoes towards the back of the class, and eventually their eyes meet. Luz’s smile is nearly ear to ear and Amity’s is sheepish and shy when they look at each other. Amity gives a tiny wave.

“Can I sit here?” Luz whispers to Amity politely, and she seems to truly wait for an answer before sitting down. 

“Of course.” Amity says, voice just barely above a whisper. Luz plops down loudly next to Amity, and she thinks about how every calculated movement she’s made up until this point is countered by Luz’s spontaneity. 

Amity is listening to the professor when she sees Luz slide a paper in front of her. The paper contains a quickly scrawled drawing of two knights standing on a cliff in front of a sketchy castle. One of the knights has shoulder length curly ish hair, while the other is pulled up into a half ponytail, reminiscent of both Luz’s and her hairstyles. The castle itself is labeled “Basic Drawing 1”. Amity smiles, eyeing the drawing. It’s actually really good considering Luz was able to whip this up in about 8 minutes. Er, not that Amity was counting, or anything.

Luz eventually leans into Amity’s side for a moment to write something on the bottom of the drawing. Amity finds that she can’t focus on the lecture or the drawing because the warmth of Luz’s body leaning against hers is too distracting and she ironically feels herself more or less too frozen to scoot away. “Can’t believe we have a class together!!” reads the text under the drawing. Amity thinks Luz’s handwriting is pretty nice, noticing the big roundish letters and all caps letters. Fitting .

Amity grabs the pencil Luz left on the table and writes back, “Right? Also this drawing is incredible.” Amity’s writing is smaller, pointed and is all in lowercase.

Luz writes back a huge “TY” next to Amity’s handwriting.

They both giggle at each other and the drawing sits between the two as they both semi listen to lecture. It’s clear Luz is pretty distracted overall as she is shaking her leg while sitting on the stool-like seats of the studio. Luz is wearing olive overalls and a black shirt, and Amity can’t help but feel distracted by Luz. Just her sheer presence is attention grabbing. 

The lecture eventually ends with a lengthy story about the importance of art education, and the professor delivering their first assignment, which is to draw how they see themselves using any medium. While words are not necessary, they’re asked to write a paragraph about their drawing if they are so inclined. The assignment itself feels really daunting, ironically enough. Not only is Amity not ready to draw, she’s not ready to think about how she sees herself, either. It’s a tough prompt.

Amity and Luz walk out of class together, the last 2 in the studio space. Amity sees Luz punching the air once they’re out saying “I still can’t believe we have a class together, what are the odds?”

Amity laughs, Luz looks silly, that’s for sure, but it’s so charming how disarming the whole action is. “So wild.” Amity says, smiling, “I’m actually really glad, I was kind of worried about this class.”

Luz looks at Amity, breaking her air pose and standing normally again, “Worried?”

“Yeah I haven’t really…. been creative since I was a child.” Amity thinks for a moment, “It’s like using a different part of my brain that’s been dormant for so long. I don’t know what to think of it.”

Luz really does seem to ponder Amity’s words before putting a hand on Amity’s shoulder, “Well. If it helps, you won’t have to think too much as being creative comes from the heart.” Luz gestures at her chest. “I’m thinking that letting yourself feel will be the hardest part of this class.”

Huh. The words cut deeper than Luz probably intends but they hit Amity square in the face. She’s right, and Amity realizes she’s likely going to face things she’s deliberately pushed to the side all of her life. It feels like dusting off an old picture frame only to realize you hate the picture inside.

Amity desperately thinks of something to change the subject because it feels awkwardly deep and she doesn’t want to talk more about herself. “So. Remind me, what made you so late again?”

Amity sees Luz’s face fall for a brief moment before answering with a smile, “OH! My dorm mates and I were exploring different parts of campus! There’s definitely some hidden gems out here.”

Amity smiles, glad that whatever tension that took hold of the moment earlier just dissipates, “Care to share any?”

Luz laughs, leaning in, and Amity silently freaks out wondering why Luz is leaning in. “That is. If you can keep a secret, Amity.”

Duh, Luz is being expressive and Amity is definitely overthinking things again. She fumbles over her words a bit, truly caught off guard by everything, “Y-Yep. Your, uh, secrets are safe with me.”

Luz starts to chuckle, likely at Amity’s awkwardness, “I was totally joking, but your response is so sweet.” Luz boops Amity’s forehead gently with a finger, and Amity feels herself blush. “Thanks. And likewise.” Luz says with a smile. 

The pair kind of linger a bit too long on Luz’s words and Amity is reminded how difficult it is to make new friends. Thankfully Luz is really kind and accommodating, filling the seemingly awkward moment with tales of campus and her dorm mates. Surprisingly, it does sound like they found some great spots and Amity can’t help but think of exploring with Luz and how fun that must’ve been for them. Luz offers to show Amity what it’s like to live in the dorm, and as much as Amity really does want to go, she doesn’t feel ready to do so, it feels like she’d need to be more mentally prepared to meet Luz’s friends. Luz offers to walk her back to the apartment after expressing she’s finished for the day. Amity wants to protest out of feeling guilty, but she bends to the thought that says there’ll be more time with Luz. 

“So what made you choose Hexside University?” Amity asks while walking at a crawl. She unintentionally sets the pace as Luz has slowed down too. 

“Honestly? A mixture of a lot of things. This place was one of the only schools with a major I could see myself studying, and…” Luz pauses for a moment, as if to find her words, “I wanna help both of my moms in some weird way.”

Amity nods, processing her words, not fully understanding them without context. She opts for a more generic response as she waits to hear Luz expand on her thoughts, “Your major sounds interesting and no doubt you’ll have lots of time to learn.”

“Yeah, it’s weird, my birth mom is a vet, so erm, doctor adjacent, and my other mom is like, perpetually sick. Like, you’d think the two situations would work with each other but modern medicine isn’t helping and I wanted to study… alternative methods of healing.” Luz kicks a rock on the sidewalk into the street, “No doubt history would be able to tell me something.”

“I think that’s really admirable. And that your moms should be proud of you.” Amity means it. And while she may not fully understand Luz’s reasoning, she recognizes that she’s been sheltered so long that there’s a lot to reality she herself is learning too. “There’s a lot to this world that we don’t know, I don’t doubt you’d be able to find something.”

Luz sighs, sounding like a weight has lifted off her shoulders, “I don’t think I've ever told anyone that before.”

Amity shrugs, trying to be as reassuring as possible, “Obviously we are still very new friends but what I've gathered is you’re a pretty tenacious person who has probably gone through a lot to get to this point. If anyone is gonna find help for your mom, it’ll be you.”

Amity looks at Luz who is deep in thought at Amity’s words. She’s never seen Luz this serious before but it’s not unwelcome and Amity gives her space. “Thanks Amity. I half expect people to make fun of me, so I'm still getting used to all this niceness.”

Amity’s mind flashes to Boscha for a moment, thinking about how most of her life has been defined by mean people who have used their behavior to get ahead of those around them, even if they’re friends with you. Herself included. Luz has been so totally refreshing as she seemingly goes against everything Amity has ever known, and it’s even wilder that she finds herself relating to Luz’s sentiment. “Oh god, tell me about it.”

Luz laughs, looking like she wants to say something but instead points out they’ve made it to Amity’s building, “Whoa, this is a lot…. bigger now that I'm seeing it in the light.”

It doesn’t take long for deja vu to set in as they both shuffle a bit outside of Amity’s apartment. “Yeah, I’m still getting used to it myself.” Amity laughs a bit, rubbing her neck sheepishly, “Did you wanna come up and hang out for a bit? I know you said you’re free and you definitely don’t have to if you have other plans…….” Amity trails off, not fully knowing why it’s so nerve wracking to ask and realizing she’s probably rambling. 

Luz is smiling again before responding with no hesitation, “100% yes!”

The two head inside of Amity’s apartment building, and Amity makes sure to prime Luz about Boscha’s quirks and the move in mess. It’s by no means perfect, but Amity knows with Luz, it probably doesn’t have to be.

Chapter Text

Amity and Luz enter Amity’s apartment after some time lingering outside and in the elevator. It’s pretty early in the afternoon and thankfully it seems like both Boscha and Skara are out for classes. This gives Amity ample time to show Luz around the apartment, which is still generally out of sorts. It’s clear that Luz doesn’t seem to mind. “This is really nice!” Luz remarks, after being shown the kitchen and living room area.

Amity laughs, “It’s definitely a fucking mess that’s for sure, but thank you.” Amity looks around before realizing she’d have to show her room next, “Ah, my room is er, not fully unpacked. Just as a general warning.”

It’s Luz who looks around a bit before locking eyes with Amity, likely in some reassuring gesture that Amity can’t recognize. “I promise, it can’t be as wild as Eda’s house, so no judgment here.” Luz does some sort of saluting motion. It’s a cute gesture, and Amity shakes the thought away before she realizes the implication from it. 

Amity opens the door to her room and holds it open for Luz as she walks in. Amity’s room is just short of messy, with clothes kinda half out the hamper, and foundation powder and other make up littering the vanity. The walls itself in the room are bare with the exception of some posters, one being for The Good Witch Azura, a book that Amity secretly would read in the Library growing up, deliberately careful just to make sure Odalia never found out. Luz’s eyes light up when she sees the poster, moving to stand in front of it. “You like The Good Witch Azura? This is probably my favorite series of all time , Amity.”

Amity smiles somewhat shyly, “Yeah. I used to spend countless hours as a kid just in the library hiding away and reading the series all the time.” she stands next to Luz who is still staring at the poster, “My mom would never approve of me reading it. She’d probably say something annoying, like, I'm poisoning my brain or something.”

Luz is contemplative at Amity’s words, and turns to look directly at her, “Well I’ll have her know, I learned a lot about being an amazing person from reading the books and watching the movies.” 

Funny enough it makes Amity think about how despite every opportunity, every tutor, every possible advantage, they ended up in the same place. She knew everything her mom said was bullshit growing up, but this moment really solidifies it for her, and it makes her admire Luz more. “The sad part is even if you proved that in like, documented data and analysis she wouldn’t listen.” Amity backs up and lays back down on her bed, staring at the ceiling, “It’s like she’s committed to just misunderstanding me.” Amity sighs, “Ugh sorry.”

Luz fully turns around now, standing and staring at Amity. “Wait, why are you sorry?” She quickly moves to where Amity is laying, and sits on the floor next to the bed, resting her chin on the mattress itself, looking at Amity again.

Amity turns to look back at her, and it’s so oddly intimate for her, like she hasn’t been looked at like this or really seen in a way that Luz is staring. It's almost like what she imagines it’s like under a microscope, a specimen watched over for all its little details and movements. She feels anxiety? nervousness? She isn’t really sure, in the pit of her stomach.

“Um. for talking about myself, I guess?” Amity looks everywhere but not at Luz. “And my mom.”

“Hold on, we’re in your room. Your space. It’s totally ok to talk about yourself.” Luz looks down to the comforter, “I wanna hear what you have to say. And bonus points if it’s about Azura.”

The response isn’t what Amity is expecting and it makes her smile and laugh to herself a bit. “Someone told me recently that I talk too much.” 

Luz sinks her chin deeper into the mattress before responding. Her face is serious, eyes and voice low, “I don’t know who told you that but they couldn’t be more wrong. You don’t talk too much and you’re allowed to express yourself.” Luz looks to Amity, who is looking back at Luz, eyes pooling with tears. “I got told that a lot growing up, and, to be honest, I've heard that as recently as last year. Words like that can really consume you, eat you alive and leave you a shell of what you once were. You don’t deserve to hear that.” 

Luz reaches out to wipe a tear that rolled down Amity’s face. It’s shocking at first, the touch feels like a jolt on her skin. As much as her initial instinct is to move away, she closes her eyes. Luz’s hands are soft and gentle, like she doesn’t want to break Amity.

They stay there a while like that. Amity feels Luz break down her walls, one by one, and so she shares about her mom, her time growing up, and how confusing everything is for her right now. She’s spent most of her life trying to please people who have been really cruel to her, and the moment she tries to think for herself, she’s put down. She can’t help but think she is a pawn in a game her mother is orchestrating. She wants to feel independent without the tether around her ankle pulling her back to her parents’ whim. Amity can’t help but feel betrayed by the people who claim to care about her the most. 

Amity shares about her siblings, who, while well intentioned, are an extension of the suffocation she feels at the thought of her parents. She talks about growing up, needing to be what her parents wanted her to be or fear of punishment, and how cruel she has been to others because she thought that is what life was supposed to be like. Ever grateful for the opportunities she has been provided, they have come at the cost of her sanity.

Luz sits and listens, nodding every so often and holding eye contact to show Amity that she is listening.  She doesn’t only give space for Amity to speak, she holds space so gently and with intense care. Amity can’t help but feel grateful they met when they did. 

Luz can’t necessarily relate to Amity, and she is pretty honest about that, but speaks on knowing what it’s like to feel different, to feel overlooked and discarded. How her mother tried her best as a widow, but couldn’t always give Luz what she needed. And how she’s never really been alone because she has always had people around her but that sometimes that experience can be so lonely.

Amity can relate and that in itself is scary and freeing at the same time.

They stay there in silence for a bit, and Amity eventually rolls to face the ceiling. “If you ever find yourself feeling that way from now on, let me know. We can be alone together.” She smiles, eyes fixed to the fan on her ceiling. She’s fully honest and she means it, and it’s probably one of the bravest things Amity has done in a while.

“Like my drawing from class?” Luz sounds hopeful.

“Like your drawing from class.”

———

Amity gets through the week relatively smoothly, with the rest of her classes flying by. She finds moments of happiness throughout her week as Luz texts her memes and daily updates of her self portrait, which surprisingly ends up having a fuckton of charcoal and bright colors to contrast. She almost wants to be bold enough to ask for a selfie when she sees the drawing because she knows Luz probably has charcoal on her face and— she doesn’t ask.

They both end up being really busy throughout the week because of their classes, and Amity is decently okay with that. Her lectures and discussion sections prove to be relatively easy so far, with a beginners calculus class and some other foundational science classes. They end up bleeding into one another after a while, and thankfully, Amity thinks she’s able to handle it. And while college is definitely different, her wanting to be as successful as possible in her classes stays the same.

Aside from her classes, she has fully managed to avoid Boscha throughout the week. Her rule of thumb is that as soon as Boscha enters the apartment when she happens to be in the living room, Amity references a phone call and retreats to her room. It’s not slick in the slightest, and she’s sure Boscha caught on after the first time she’s done it. Still, it makes her wonder how long Boscha is realistically going to wait before addressing the tension that is threaded throughout the apartment.

It comes to no surprise when Amity hears a knock on her door at the tail end of their first week as she was making an attempt to sketch the assignment for her drawing class (to no avail). The distraction is welcome, even if she knows the conversation that’s coming next.

“Amity.” The muffled voice through the door says, along with the knocking sounds that are getting louder, “I know you’re there and I know you’re not busy.”

Amity laughs a bit at Boscha’s phrasing, while she’s not wrong , she’s not exactly right either. Amity walks up to the door and lets out a huge sigh before opening it to see Boscha staring back at her. “Hi.” Amity says, a bit deadpan.

“You’re avoiding me, Amity.” Boscha looks at her, arms crossed and looking pretty serious. 

“Yes.” Amity is honest, half smiling at Boscha.

Boscha huffs a bit before looking at the ground, “Can we go in the living room and just talk?” 

Amity has never seen Boscha bounce back this early after a fight before, so she knows Boscha must be really trying. Amity opts for grace, even though she can’t help a part of her wanting to be rude. “Yeah, sure thing.” 

They move into the living room and Boscha gestures awkwardly to the couch, waiting for Amity to sit before saying anything. “Look. Blight, I know I can be a bit….much.” Boscha sighs, “And it’s not an excuse for how I acted, and I see how distant you’ve been this whole week, and I guess I don’t know how to say this…. Fuck.” Boscha pauses, staring away from Amity.

The pause is a bit awkward because it truly feels like Boscha is grasping at straws, so Amity tries to see if she could use some encouragement, and Luz has shown her multiple times this week that a little goes a long way. “I know you might not know what to say, but it can’t hurt to try, right?”

Boscha groans, leaning back into the couch, struggle evident on her face. “Fuck, ok um, LOOK, AMITY. I’m sorry, I was a bitch, and I was totally out of line.” Amity sees Boscha nearly cringe at the apology, “I just wanted to leave a good impression on my new friends and… I was wrong to think you threatened that.” 

As much as Amity wants to say something snarky in response, she stays quiet to give Boscha space to get all her thoughts out. It’s kind of nice to hear her fumble through the half baked apology. Boscha is usually really good at keeping herself composed beyond her most extreme emotions, happiness and anger, so to see her be vulnerable is how Amity knows she’s being most authentic. 

Boscha stands from the couch and starts to pace, likely out of nerves, “Look, you don’t even have to forgive me, I’m just tired of this awkwardness in the apartment and I know you fake a call every time I come in, and I don’t want our first year to be tarnished by my….. er… shitty behavior.”

“I forgive you.”

“I totally get if you need some space and— Wait, what?” Boscha stops pacing to look at Amity.

“I said I forgive you.” Amity says, watching Boscha fidget around. It’s a bit sad to watch her so unraveled by reality that she can’t fathom someone forgiving her.

Boscha moves back to the couch and sits down next to Amity, “What the fuck, Amity?” she sighs, “I was expecting to fight you.”

No shocker there, Boscha tends to fight at every turn, even when she’s dead wrong. “I just think our fight was dumb, honestly. And besides, I know you wanted to make a good impression and I can see how in the moment I was a threat to that.” Amity looks to Boscha, “I’m not your enemy, I’m navigating all this crazy shit too.” 

Boscha looks like she’s really thinking on Amity’s words, she doesn’t respond.

Amity tries to think back to that night, which for some reason feels like ages ago, “I’m sorry for the way I talked to you.” She runs a quick hand through her hair, “But I’m not sorry for talking.”

Boscha’s eyes furrow at Amity’s comment, “I was a bitch for saying that.” 

A natural silence falls between them, and the thread that was once taut throughout the apartment and in between Amity and Boscha is now slack. “So this is what being an adult is like, huh?”

“It’s fucking weird, Amity.” They both kind of laugh, and Amity realizes how tense she was, moments prior, letting out a sigh she didn’t even know she was holding onto. Before Amity can respond, Boscha speaks again, “Soooo. Now that we’re sorta friends again, are you gonna tell me about who was here a couple of days ago? You sounded like you were having so much fun without us.”

Amity blinks a few times, fighting an inevitable blush that paints her cheeks. “I-I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Amity looks away in an attempt to deflect the conversation.

“Oh bitch, please. I could hear you two laughing all across the apartment when I got home.” Boscha says, waving her hands around in exasperation, “I don’t think I’ve ever in the history of us knowing each other have heard you laugh that loud before.”

Amity groans out of embarrassment; even with the most privacy she’s had in her entire life, it still isn’t private. “I was just hanging out with a classmate from my drawing class. They were late to class and happened to sit next to me.” It’s not a complete lie, and Amity decides that she’s ok with sharing that much with Boscha. “Her name is Luz.”

Boscha nods, her eyebrows raised a bit in a way that Amity doesn’t fully understand. “Well. You’ll have to introduce me next time she’s here, yeah?”

Amity realizes if she appeases Boscha, she can probably get out of this conversation as quickly as possible. She would rather talk to Boscha about their own problems than her friendship with Luz, “Next time, for sure, Boscha.”

Amity gets up off the couch as if to immediately leave the conversation, when Boscha says, “Great, so how does tomorrow night, 7:00pm sound? Dinner with all of us? I’ll order in.” 

Fuck. “Um. Yeah, I’ll see if she’s free. I’ll uh, let you know?” Amity gives the nicest smile she can muster at Boscha before turning back towards her room. “Thanks for apologizing.” she says before closing the door behind her.

Amity enters her room and quickly falls face first onto her bed, sighing into her sheets. 

Amity’s talk with Boscha feels like a win and lose. On one hand, she’s relieved they were able to resolve their issues without any yelling (which is super unusual on Boscha’s end), and on the other, she feels really conflicted and awkward having to introduce Luz to her roommates. She’s not sure why the thought of asking Luz to do literally anything feels bigger than it actually is.

She shrugs away the thought because that’s definitely for another day, and looks to the sketchbook on her nightstand, still open from moments before. She wasn’t able to really get anything on paper besides idle scribbles. 

The class prompt is to draw how they see themselves but Amity is at a loss because she has no idea what that means or what it would look like to draw her deepest thoughts. If she’s honest, she’d draw nothing, not feeling significant enough to even have a mark on the page. She casually wonders if she could half ass her way through that one in class. Probably not.

In a desperate attempt to spur some inspiration, she pulls her phone out to text Em and Ed, who might have some insight into how she sees herself.  Because other people can totally help her draw how she sees herself, right? 

2 messages.

[6:56 pm] Luz🤗 : movie nite my dorm room sleep over yes

[7:01pm] Luz🤗 : I have a dragons horde of snacks 🐉

Amity smiles at the set of texts, and it seems like she’ll have to talk to Em and Ed later.

[7:15pm] Amity: your snack pile is tempting 🤔🤔🤔

[7:15pm] Amity: can i bring my sketchbook? 😲

[7:16pm] Luz🤗 : yes so u can draw me like one of ur french girls

Amity laughs before staring at her phone, really unsure what to reply back. At times, it feels like friendship comes so easily with Luz, while at others it makes her brain work into overdrive and she goes through 20 different responses she could say. She replies after racking her brain. 

[7:18pm] Amity: only in exchange for some of the snacks you mentioned lol

[7:19pm] Luz🤗 : blight youve got yourself a deal 🤝🤝

[7:20pm] Amity: see you soon Luz 💖

Amity pulls the phone close to her chest, hugging herself before sinking further into her bed. She takes a moment to think about her last text before getting ready to leave. Why did you send a heart she’s gonna think you’re weirdo what is wrong with you ? and she wonders if that even matters; do friends really think about this kind of stuff?  Is… she the only one thinking about all of this? 

Her mind then wanders to the dorms itself, and Amity realizes that Luz never explicitly said who is going or if she’s going to be hanging out with Luz… alone. She can handle both, she just feels herself getting nervous at the latter thought. A lot of confusing, contradictory feelings come up when she thinks about Luz.

As much as she just wants to become a part of her bed and fall into the temptation that is overthinking, she forces herself to get up, change, and pack what she might need for the night.

As she exits her room on the way out the door, she can hear Boscha say “Where are you going?”

And although Amity knows she doesn’t have to answer, she thinks it would be rude to ignore her. She stops just shy of opening the front door. “I’m heading over to Luz’s dorm.”

Boscha scoffs, not turning away from the TV show she’s watching, “Don’t forget to ask about dinner this Sunday. And also, I can’t believe you have more of a fucking life than I do right now.”

Amity chortles on the way out, closing the door behind her and making the walk to campus.

She has never been to the dorms before, but thankfully she lives so close to campus that closing the distance shouldn’t be too difficult. She remembers practically begging her mom to let her stay in the same place that she’s about to hang out with Luz at. While she’s almost certain dorm rooms are smaller than her apartment’s bathroom, she doesn’t mind and thinks it adds to the charm. The idea of living in such close proximity to friends, peers, and random people is charming and mysterious. She wonders if Luz and her would get along if they were randomly assigned to be roommates.

The thought is fleeting, nice. It dances in her head ever so gently, wisping and curling until it turns into something scary, almost all consuming, filling the corners of her mind with thoughts of being a weirdo and creep. She can’t help shake the feeling as though she is thinking too much about Luz.

Amity tries to push out those thoughts as she makes her way up the front stairs of what she can only assume is the dorms based on the information she was given. On the outside, it just looks like a big house with seemingly endless windows. “River’s End” is what this building is labeled in white text on the front door, along with an address. There isn’t anything too fancy about this building except that it looks like an old rustic Victorian home. It’s not what she expects when she thinks of a dorm, but she’s not against the experience. Students sit on the steps leading to the patio, idly speaking about something they saw online. Amity tries hard to not pay attention to their conversation as she stands closer to the door. 

Ah right, she should probably let the person that invited her know that she is here. She pulls out her phone as she shuffles her feet. She’s nervous for some reason and she can’t quite put her finger on it. 

[7:38pm] Amity: rivers end is a funny name for a dorm

[7:39pm] Amity: trying desperately to block out these people on the patio talking about tik tok

[7:40pm] Amity: i’m eavesdropping against my will lol

[7:41pm] Luz🤗 : OMG UR HERE yes i’m coming down to save you

[7:42pm] Amity: my hero

Amity waits what feels like less than 5 minutes before hearing the front door open behind her. She turns around to see Luz popping her head through the crack in the door. Her hair falls in waves, framing her face nicely. Luz looks happy to see Amity. “There you are!” She smiles, opening the door for Amity, “I’m here to save you, come in.”

Amity waves a bit before squeezing past Luz holding open the door, being extra careful not to accidentally bump or rub against Luz in any way. Once inside the main lobby space and what looks to be like a sunken den, she stops for a moment to take in all the aesthetics. The floors are a dark hardwood with accent rugs near couches, and random students are sitting idly watching TV. It seems like a really lively space. “This is….not what I was expecting.”

“It’s definitely different from what I'm used to, that’s for sure! But it’s nice, I promise!” Luz rubs her neck before saying, “It’s good to see you.”

Amity smiles, “Thanks for inviting me.” She pauses, looking at everything but Luz, “It’s good to see you too, Luz.”

Luz smiles wide, she looks genuinely happy at the sentiment. “Wanna head to my room? I’ll give you the grand tour later.”

“Yeah!”

One of Amity’s hands is quickly grabbed by Luz, something she doesn’t realize happens until she is trailing behind her and pulled up a flight of stairs. The carpeted wood creaking under their feet as Luz giggles along the way. Amity feels her anxiety wash away and she finds herself giggling too.  

They end up in a hallway that Amity can only gather is Luz’s floor after hearing her say, “Almost there!” The hallway itself has seemingly countless doors with various different name tags made of construction paper and markers. They look to be cut out like various different animal silhouettes. She makes a mental note to see what animal Luz’s name tag was given.

Amity doesn’t realize she’s deep in thought until Luz pulls them to a stop and releases Amity’s hand after lingering a bit in front of what appears to be Luz’s dorm room. The warmth of Luz’s hand was immediately noted by Amity. “We made it! This is my room.”

Amity looks to the door where Luz’s name tag is, and a brown silhouette of what appears to be an owl is picked for her, with her name in large black letters. “You’re an owl! How cute.”

Luz smiles really wide and Amity can’t quite tell if she’s blushing or not, “I’m an owl!” Luz brings a hand up to the door, knocking for a few seconds before opening the door, “Knock knock! It's me! Luz!”

Amity walks in after Luz into a small space with two beds on opposite sides of the room, it looks like Luz’s roommate is deep in whatever show she’s watching to turn around, with her headphones audible across the room. Luz’s side of the room is…. charming, filled with posters, pictures and string lights. Her bed isn’t made, and a pile of blankets and pillows are strewn about. It feels characteristically Luz, and Amity feels her chest tighten.

Just before Amity can really linger on the feelings coming up for her, she watches as Luz creeps up to her roommate before tapping her on the shoulder. “EEP.” Luz’s roommate jumps and turns around to look at Luz “You scared me!“ Amity swears she recognizes that face.

“I’m so sorry!” Luz starts laughing, “I figured if I was going to scare you at some point I'd at least get it over with now .” Luz shuffles a bit to gesture to Amity, “Willow, this is Amity, she’s staying over to watch movies with you, me and Gus!”

Willow. As in, Willow Park. Willow Park as in her former best friend from elementary who she and her friends definitely ended up bullying all throughout middle and the start of high school. THAT Willow Park.

They blink in mutual acknowledgement of each other when Amity finds the gall to croak out, “H-Hi Willow. Nice to meet you.”

“Likewise, Amity.” A silence falls between them that Amity can only perceive as awkward and so incredibly heavy.

Luz looks in between the two before saying, “Wait, do you two…. know each other?”

Willow quickly interjects as soon as Luz is finished talking, “NO! Nope.” Willow’s voice cracking.

Amity follows up with, “First time meeting yep, super nice room Willow.” Very Smooth, Amity.

The exchange seems to convince Luz enough because she smiles at both of them, beginning to reference the countless movies she wants to watch tonight. Amity feels guilt, nervousness and what feels like anxiety bubble to the surface. She silently hopes she can get through the night without raising too much of an alarm with Willow. She can’t help but feel the occasional eyebrow raised in her direction, though.

She has felt so many times this week that the universe was playing games with her but this moment definitely solidifies it. She stays on her best behavior for everyone’s sake, but can’t help feeling awkward, out of her element, and so incredibly guilty.

Chapter Text

Amity and Willow have a complicated history; one influenced by time, familial influence and immaturity. Amity met Willow as a young kid, after falling off the slide a bit too fast and most certainly hurting her leg. Instead of going to the nurse, Amity ran away out of pure embarrassment into a staircase of the school and cried for the rest of playtime. Willow, having no real friends at the time, just happened to be scouring the halls and found her alone, sobbing, and decided to comfort her, eventually convincing Amity to seek help. One sprained ankle later, and the pair became fast friends. Willow was kind and sweet and so scared of the world, where Amity was brave, far braver than she is presently, and wanted to support her friend as much as possible to repay her for her kindness. 

Amity and Willow would spend countless days at school together, and spend a lot of weeknights together studying and getting through their classes as young kids. As Amity excelled more and more throughout classes, Willow fell behind, further and further into remedial classes and daily meetings with Tutors. It was clear in hindsight that Willow needed more than what their school could provide. While Amity, at the time, truly didn’t think anything of it and never thought less of her throughout Willow’s educational trajectory, Amity’s parents thought differently.

When Willow’s parents and Amity’s got to meet at a parent teacher conference at the beginning of middle school, Amity’s parents solidified their disgust and disdain for the Park family. While Amity couldn’t understand at the time, it was clear they couldn’t accept Park’s fathers as loving and committed parents. Instead of directly being honest about their aversion and judgment of queer people, they used Willow as a scapegoat, using every opportunity to prevent Amity from hanging out with Willow, citing “bad grades and an ‘unsavory lifestyle’” as reasons Amity should cease all contact with the Park family. 

Initially, Amity tried her best to support Willow as much as possible within school hours (because she could no longer see Willow beyond that block of time). Soon enough their time together was few and far between because it became increasingly difficult to find time in between classes to properly catch up and support one another. And because Amity's parent’s have an overbearing influence, Willow never got a proper reason for Amity cutting contact. 

As Amity and Willow fell off, she found herself more in the presence of Boscha and Skara, two people who came from the richest of families with the most influence in town. These two were strictly approved by her parents, and chosen to be Amity’s companions. Any attempt to rebel, contest, or speak to Odalia was met with harsh punishment. For that reason, Amity eventually stopped fighting and bent to the will of her parent’s influence. As much as she truly wanted to be Willow’s friend, she couldn’t handle the lengths her mom would go to keep them isolated.

Amity’s compliance took root when Boscha decided she would be leader of their “friendship group” and because Amity at this time had gone from more resistant in elementary school to more obedient with time, she just let it happen. All throughout middle school Boscha dictated who Amity and Skara could speak to, but also who was punished for being different throughout school. Both their grades and parent’s donations to the school allowed Boscha, Skara, and Amity to get away with their behavior. 

Of course, Amity was no saint during this time, and to ensure her place as the best of the best she succumbed to being nasty to the very person she used to be closest with, someone who saw Amity for who she really was. It started as “harmless” side comments during lunch, at least, that’s what Amity said to herself to justify speaking about Willow struggling in classes, to full on name calling throughout middle school. Amity pushed away her guilt further and further as the cruel behavior became more normalized among her friend group. 

And while she never could really stop the feelings that said she was doing something wrong, she didn’t exactly push back against Boscha, either. She reminded Amity far too much of her mother to be brave.

This dynamic continued all throughout middle school and early on into high school. At some point, Amity realized she cared far more about her academics than she did about being cruel so despite still hanging with Boscha and Skara, she just ignored any and all comments about others. Often saying, “Don’t you think we’re getting too old to care about this kind of stuff?”

And while she eventually grew out of blatantly bullying people, she never sat down to fix any of the damage she had contributed to and caused. Willow occasionally crossed her mind but she never could anticipate that they would not only be in the same room together, but forced to interact in such close proximity, mutually pretending this was their first time meeting. 

It’s in Luz’s dorm room where she learns that Willow is studying Botany, a subject she was immensely passionate about, even in elementary school, but fell behind because she was forced to focus on other things. It makes Amity think about all the things she’s been so wrong about. 

“Isn’t it cool she’s studying plants, Amity?” Luz says, bumping shoulders with Amity who is on Luz’s left side.

Amity smiles, being as polite as she can, “Yeah, definitely, plants can be so overlooked. It’s really cool, Willow.” She means it, but worries about how she must sound, and wonders if her tone is genuine enough. It’s nerve wracking.

Willow looks at Amity with eyebrows furrowed, her face looks conflicted, like she's thinking. Amity can’t really read it though, and Willow looks off to the large window of the dorm in front of their desks. “Yeah, for a long time I thought there was something wrong with me. People used to make fun of me for it.” 

Ah, yes, she deserves this.

Rather than sit in the public embarrassment that only she and Willow know about, she decides to challenge the both of them. “It takes a pretty insecure and cruel person to do something like that, you didn’t deserve that.” She hopes it’s enough of an olive branch for Willow but she’s not really sure.

Amity can feel Willow's eyes on her as she adjusts her seating position on the floor, shifting from crossing her legs to having her legs outstretched forward. They fall into silence, with the exception of Luz idly eating chips as ambient sound. Amity is ever thankful for the levity Luz brings, even if she doesn’t know it.

Just as Amity thinks Willow is going to respond or change the subject, the door behind them swings open quickly. Luz nearly chokes on chips as the voice behind them says, “And the party has now arrived!” The person is holding what looks to be liters of soda in their hands.

“GUS! You made it!” Luz says, jumping up from where she is sitting enthusiastically before rushing up to him and scooping him up into a hug. 

“I did! And I brought some extra movies too because I know the ones you chose are probably cheesy.”

Luz laughs, “Are you joking? The more cheesy the better! Unless you’re…. lactose intolerant of course.” She turns to look at Amity who is sitting, feeling a bit awkward but not trying to show that on her face. She smiles at Luz softly. “This is Amity! Amity, this is Gus, he lives on the floor above.”

She waves to Gus after the introduction, who waves back with his elbows, given that his hands are full, “Ah yes, this is the Amity I’ve heard so much about?”

Luz talks about her? To other people? Amity feels her chest tighten a bit and she feels her face get red. She tries to hide it by putting her hands on both sides of her cheeks. She swears she feels Gus and Willow staring at her.

Amity can’t see Luz’s expression but she turns around so fast to address Gus and looks like she’s mouthing and gesturing at him. His eyes go wide a bit before closing his mouth. He tries to recover, his voice cracking, “Nice to meet you, Amity.”

Amity realizes she should probably respond quickly like a human being, but instead takes a pause before saying, “Nice to meet you too, Gus.” and to break some of the tension in the room, she asks, “What movies did you bring?”

“Oh yes! Let me show you.” Gus places the liters of soda on Luz’s desk before sitting down next to Amity. Gus throws his backpack enthusiastically in the middle of the floor and gestures for Luz and Willow to huddle in with them.

As Gus explains the copious amounts of movies he brought, some of which include Star Wars Films, The Lord of the Rings , Tron , GhostBusters among many other movies, Amity looks to Luz who is sitting across from her. Luz’s face looks pensive? Maybe nervous? She hasn’t actually seen this expression on her face before. 

After some time as Gus talks more about what movies they should watch and his experience thus far as a Drama major interested in all things film, Amity finally sees Luz look up at her. Amity mouths the words “You ok?” hoping to check in on her friend who looks a bit out of sorts prior to moments ago. Luz smiles so softly in a way that (almost) makes everything else go silent except Amity’s own heartbeat, and Luz nods her head a bit before honing her attention back on Gus. She wonders what Luz is thinking.

Gus’ voice brings her back to reality when he says, “Amity, since you’re our formal guest for the evening, which movie do you wanna start with?”

Shit. She mentally kicks herself for not paying enough attention. “Uh.” She looks at Gus’ pile of movies in front of her and picks the one that draws her attention the most, The Lord of the Rings , and points directly to it, “I’ve never seen this before.”

“YOU’VE NEVER SEEN THE LORD OF THE RINGS BEFORE?” Gus starts looking at Willow and Luz while asking, “HAVE EITHER OF YOU SEEN THESE MOVIES?” Willow and Luz both nod their head no as well. “Oh baby! We are in for a treat tonight!” Gus says while starting to rub his hands together like he’s enacting a master plan. “Lemme guess, Amity, you’ve never played D&D before either?”

Amity blinks in confusion, having no clue what any of those words that Gus just said means, “D&D?”

Willow laughs and puts a hand quickly over Gus’ mouth, “If you start talking about D&D, we won't actually have any time for the movies tonight, plus I doubt Amity wants to sit here listening to you for hours—'' Gus makes a licking noise and Willow quickly pulls her hand away, “Oh EW!” She says while laughing. 

Amity watches the whole encounter and starts giggling along with Luz. Watching all of them interact with one another is insanely cute, and it’s sweet they’re both really trying to include her, despite everything. 

“Willow, I hate that you’re right.” Gus turns to Amity, “I’ll have to teach you another day soon,  Amity, that is if we didn’t leave too much of a bad impression on you already.”

Amity nods her head, “Not at all, you’ve all been really kind.” She smiles, looking at Luz.

“Y’all ready to build a fort?” Luz says with the biggest smile on her face.

From there, the four of them begin to set up a crude fort on the floor with the pillows that Luz and Willow have in the room. It’s not much, or at least, not enough to be comfortable for everyone, so they plan to nab others from common areas around the dorm. 

It’s surprisingly really fun to be in a room with people she’s (fairly) new to meeting. Amity feels like she’s in on a type of joy that she was never allowed to have as a youth. For the first time in a really long time, she’s having consistent, real, genuine fun.

The group splits up in two so that they can cover more ground in the dorm and on the hunt for more pillows or cushions for their semi-constructed fort. Luz insists on going with Amity at this point, citing that she hadn’t even given Amity a tour and that she is her guest. Amity is really thankful because she doesn’t know what it would have looked like to be paired with Willow or Gus. While everything has been really cordial so far, she cringes at the thought of how awkward it no doubt would have been.

As they walk down Luz’s hallway in search of anything that they can use, Luz says, “Are you feeling okay? Is there anything you need?” looking at Amity with such bright eyes. It makes Amity’s chest tighten.

“I’m having a really great time Luz, you’re a great host.” Amity smiles back looking at Luz just long enough to feel her face getting warm. Immediately wanting to change the subject, she says, “I really like your friends.”

Luz puts her arm around Amity’s shoulder, and she swears she can feel every point of contact between their bodies. Any attempts to stop her from warming up and blushing are futile at this point. “Aw Amity I’m sure they feel the same! How could they not?”

“I can think of a couple of reasons….” Amity mumbles, a hint of pain evident in her voice.

Luz scoffs, pulling her in a bit closer, “Well good thing there’s no room for that here, sorry!” Luz winks at Amity, “Self doubt door is closed! No exceptions.” 

“I’ll only oblige this time because you’ve been really kind to me.” Amity says somewhat bashfully. They both kind of wander into an empty common room at this point, albeit rather slowly. 

Amity knows they should be looking for pillows and cushions, but being this close to Luz is clouding her brain a bit, and she can definitely hear her own heartbeat pound in her head. She’s never really had this feeling before and she idly wonders if it’s built up anxiety? nervousness? or something entirely new. This feeling is no doubt something she’ll have to ask Ed and Em about at some point.

As Amity is clearly deep in thought, she’s bumped back into reality by Luz’s hip, “All I’m hearing is that if I'm nice I get some perks.” Luz kind of giggles a bit before saying, “I wonder what other perks you have, Blight.” Luz’s eyebrows are wiggling in such a silly way that Amity can’t help but giggle at.

The statement itself comes off way flirtier than Amity thinks Luz intends but it sends her body into overdrive. Amity is pretty warm at this point, and she wonders if Luz can tell. 

No doubt the silence probably sends Luz into a tailspin too, as Luz immediately pivots to reassuring Amity. “H-hey, I was only joking! I’m nice because it’s easy to be, not because I get things out of it. I was being silly.”

Amity grabs the hand around her shoulder with one of her own and squeezes it a bit, “I know, you’re fine, Luz. I think your jokes are… charming.” She says, looking away from Luz, feeling her ears and face burning. Eye contact feels way too intense for whatever this feeling is that she is having in response to Luz. Amity completely misses Luz’s facial reaction to grabbing her hand though.

And before Luz really has a chance to respond, Gus and Willow call from the end of the hall. Hearing their voices makes her nervous to be seen in such a vulnerable state so she lets go of Luz's hand immediately and pulls away from Luz to watch them come down the hall, pillows and cushions in tow. 

As they walk up, Willow asks, “Did you guys even make it past this floor?”

Amity finally has a chance to steal a glance at Luz who looks incredibly flustered and waving her hand in front of them, “You know? We tried but then this big uh…. Dragon… uh…” Luz then proceeds to smack her face a bit, mumbling how awful of a liar she is. 

Amity takes a deep breath and she tries to salvage whatever dignity she has left, “We didn’t. To be honest I asked a question about this place that got us so distracted, it was definitely my fault.”

Willow nods her head, “No worries, thankfully we think we got enough cushions, right Gus?”

Gus looks extremely concentrated on holding the pillows steady before beckoning the two of them to split his stack. Amity takes a couple of pillows, as does Luz, who looks like a puppy that just did something wrong. Amity has an intense urge to reassure her, but knows she can’t do that when there are so many people around.

They all end up walking back to Luz’s room and Amity decides to walk alongside Willow, loosely commenting on how many cushions there are in the dorms at all. Gus and Luz lag a bit behind just in earshot. “Hey, Earth to Luz, you know you were supposed to be grabbing pillows and not each other, right?”

Amity can’t hear Luz’s response but she sure jumps a bit at Gus’ comment. This is another reminder that people perceive her even when she doesn’t realize it. She idly has fears of what people think when they see Luz and her.

Willow must seem to notice her uneasiness and says “Don’t worry about Gus, I swear he lives to tease his friends. If you need me to say something just let me know.” 

Amity looks to Willow who is smiling sweetly at her. She definitely feels like she doesn’t deserve this kind of treatment. Amity nods and fumbles out, “Thank you. Really. I’m ok— you’re really kind.” 

They all make it back to Luz’s and they construct a much more suitable and comprehensive fort made from pillows, couch cushions and blankets. Everyone gets situated on the ground in a way that is comfortable for them, and Luz creates a nice atmosphere by turning off the lights and draping a sheet between both beds, creating a translucent canopy over the fort itself. Luz’s fairy lights glow softly through the top sheet. 

The view is perfect for movie watching and the lights set the mood well. Gus collected all of the snacks and put them in a pile for those to eat. Luz wasn’t kidding when she had a dragon’s horde. They all end up watching The Lord of the Rings, along with other movies throughout the night until they eventually fall asleep to an animated film from the 2000s. Amity forgets the name and most of the content as she drifts off to sleep sometime around 3:00am. The fort is surprisingly comfortable and it seems the others find sleep easily too.

—— ——

Amity wakes up later in the night to the sound of rustling in the room, and the door opening. She’s too groggy to know who left the room, so she pulls out her phone to see if it gives her some clarity. 4:37am, 5 messages and 3 missed calls. While normally she’d typically find herself falling asleep directly after waking up, Amity needs to use the bathroom.

Before she musters the courage and the swiftness required to get out of the room without waking whoever is still asleep, she checks her phone.

[9:30pm] Boscha💅 : Don’t forget to ask Lose, Lus, Luz (lol idk) about sunday im already thinking ahead

[9:52pm] Boscha💅 : Skara is totally on board too

[8:02pm] Em✨ : mittens i miss you let’s call or get lunch soon

[8:05pm] Ed💫 : i’ll pay miss u mittens

[7:55pm] Mom: I expect you to answer my calls, Amity. We have a networking event coming up next weekend and you’re to come, no exceptions whatsoever.

Reading the last text from her mom really irritates her and she finds herself so much more awake despite not really getting any sleep. She wipes her eyes and tries to get up as quickly and quietly as possible. While the door feels miles away, she ends up getting into the hall without falling, which is more or less a huge feet considering how dark the room is overall.

The hallway is bright and so quiet, with the exception of mumbles down the hall. She heads in the direction of the restroom that she swears Luz pointed to earlier in the night. Just before entering what she can only determine is a restroom based on the signage, Amity looks to the nearly empty common room area in front of her. She sees Luz, who looks up at her, not really smiling and gives a small wave, she looks to be on the phone. Amity waves back and steps into the restroom shortly after.

She looks sad, did something happen? Amity thinks while trying to figure out if her eyes were red from lack of sleep or something else entirely. She hopes it’s out of tiredness. She makes her way out of the bathroom and into the common space that they were in earlier that evening. Luz is sitting and no longer talking on the phone, it seems. “Morning. Mind if I join you?” Amity says groggily, her voice a bit deeper from sleep. She sees Luz nod, who scoots down the couch, making room for Amity. “You okay?”

Luz sighs, looking off into the room idly, not really looking like she’s paying attention to anything in particular. “My mom called, which she literally never does, I usually call her.” Luz looks down and plays with the hem of her shirt. “Eda had an episode last night— er, tonight. Whatever.” 

Amity watches Luz kind of slump over, while normally she would probably feel awkward sitting next to someone starting to cry, she wraps an arm around Luz so quickly and she pulls her in close, Amity starts rubbing her arm, in what she’d like to think is a comforting gesture. She’s willing to wait for Luz to talk, no matter how long that might take. “She said, ‘I’m ok, I know you’re at college, kid. I just wanted to let you know, so don’t worry too much.’ but I can’t help feeling so helpless being here when she’s back home.”

Luz kinda slumps again, crying. Amity tries her best to get more clarity. She definitely cares, but she yearns to know more. “Can I ask,” she paused a bit, “What happens during Eda’s episodes?” She pulls Luz a bit closer, squeezing hard, trying to convey how much she cares through the gesture.

 “It kinda varies… But um. She kind of blacks out in a way that makes her not really remember where she is or what she’s doing, she can’t breathe very well, and she usually trashes her house. It doesn’t happen often but when it does it’s…. scary.” Luz wipes her eyes, “It’s so unique that doctors just have no clue what’s going on.”

Amity thinks a bit, it sure does sound unique, but that doesn’t mean they can’t help, “Well, I can definitely see why you’d be concerned. Plus, it’s your mom. What do you wanna do from here?”

Luz looks at Amity and she looks really sad and broken. “To be honest, I just wanna see her, even if it’s for the rest of the weekend.”

Amity doesn’t hesitate when she says, “So let’s go. How far does she live from here?”

“Amity…” Luz says, and it looks like tears are pooling in her eyes.

Amity gives Luz a quick squeeze before saying, “I’m serious. I have a car and we can leave right now if you want to.”

“I-I can’t ask you to do that. It’s 2 hours away and it’s more remote.” Luz says, her voice shaking. 

“Well good thing you’re not asking me to do anything, I'm offering.” Amity smiles, hoping that cheers her up. “Besides, this is your family.” She wants to say something more reassuring about family but can’t really come up with anything considering her own very complicated relationship with hers, she hopes the sentiment is enough.

Luz immediately starts crying again and moves to hug Amity tightly, Luz mumbles into the embrace, “Amity I— Thank you so much.”

The hug takes Amity so incredibly off guard but it is not unwelcome. She lets herself hug Luz back just as tightly, hoping to convey how much she’s grown to care about Luz. They stay there for a while, just in each other’s presence, and Amity wants to be really mindful about giving Luz as much space as she needs to feel ready to leave. 

They decide on leaving a note for Willow and Gus so that they’re not completely confused and grab their own bags respectively. Thankfully Amity was already packed from staying at Luz’s so she stays in the common room while Luz tries her best to quietly pack. As Amity waits, she feels her eyes getting heavy and knows she’ll need to get sleep at some point today. She can’t help but think back to how warm and nice their hug was despite the circumstances around that being so awful. Amity feels a bit selfish when those thoughts arise but she’s too tired to fight them. 

Luz comes out of her room and back into the hallway with a backpack on, black and white tie dye sweater, and a knit beanie, waving at Amity. She looks… really good.

Amity doesn’t push the thought away. 

Chapter Text

[4:55am] Amity: Hey Bos, smth came up so dinner might have to be off, i’ll keep you posted.

[4:56am] Amity: Sorry

The entire time they walk from the dorms to the parking structure by Amity’s apartment, Luz is fiddling with the straps of her backpack. It’s clear she’s nervous, and Amity can’t help but feel like Luz isn’t telling her how she’s fully feeling. Still, she wants to respect how Luz feels, and give her space until she feels ready to talk. She doesn’t mind offering kind words as they idly walk, though.

“I want to drive you, you know that right?”

“I know I don’t have to, I want to.”

“I meant what I said in my room, you don’t have to go through this alone.”

Each time she reassures Luz she means it with her whole heart.

The sun is just barely starting to come up when they make it to the parking structure, with vibrant orange and purple hues that paint the sky in a way that only dreams can conjure. Luz snaps a picture, citing that she wants to remember this sky. If Amity could take a snapshot of Luz taking the snapshot, as silly as that would be, she honestly would. She settles for just watching her though.

They make it up to the parking structure and to Amity’s car, putting everything they need in the backseat. Luz slips into the front seat, buckling herself in while profusely thanking Amity again. While this definitely isn’t how she imagined her Friday night (Saturday morning), she is content helping someone she’s quickly grown to care about so much. She gently reassures Luz again, “Luz, I'm glad I can do this for you.”

Amity’s eyes are burning as soon as she turns the car on and they’re out on the road. The quiet sound of the tires hitting dewy pavement fills the air. It’s loud, and a bit unnerving. In a futile attempt to break the tension she’s created in her head,  Amity fiddles nervously with the radio. “Um. Luz? Did you want to listen to anything? I’m not sure what you like.”

Luz hums a bit before saying, “I’d like to just enjoy the sunrise if that's alright with you.”

“Yeah, of course.” While it’s not exactly the answer Amity expects, music does feel like a lot right now. “It’ll be ok, you know? We’ll be at Eda’s in no time.” Amity says, not breaking eye contact from the road, which at this time on a Saturday morning is surprisingly empty. “I’m actually pretty excited to meet her.”

Amity can feel Luz’s eyes on her, “You are?”

“Yeah, she sounds like a really amazing person, and from what I’ve gathered, she’s played such a big role in your life.” Amity’s tone is low, steady and a hint of tiredness can be heard in her voice. Amity sees Luz fidgeting in the corner of her eye.

“Yeah, she really helped shape me into the person I am today.” Luz lets the words linger in the air a bit. Amity initially thinks she wants to say more about that, but doesn’t.

“How’d you meet her?” Amity asks, ever curiously.

Amity hears Luz adjust her seating position, saying, “It’s an… interesting story actually, we met when I was young. Like middle school young. I was playing in the woods really close to my house and even though my mom said ‘Don’t go too far, Mija.’, I did . And I got totally lost— and of course, this was before cell phones— So I kept wandering until I found Eda’s house by accident.” Luz laughs before continuing, “I did everything you totally shouldn’t do in hindsight, but I was a dumb kid with a growing curiosity to explore. So, I knocked, and Eda answered.”

Amity at this point is totally enamored with the story, wanting to so badly see Luz’s expression as she tells it. She nods her head every so often to show she is listening. “Go on.”

“And so she took me in, I met her dog, King,— who had the biggest attitude, by the way— and she fed me and brought me right back home. God. The look on my mom’s face when she saw me with Eda was priceless. But ever since then I kept wandering into the woods to Eda’s place. Something drew me into it.”

“And did she mind that you kept showing up?” 

“Honestly, yeah, she didn’t like that I kept popping by. She’d always say, ‘Kid, you have a mom, a nice house, please stop coming here.’ and every time i’d just sit and stay and play with King and eventually, she stopped saying that. I helped her around the house, I took care of King when she was away, it was just really nice growing up.”

Amity takes a moment to look at Luz briefly, noting how bright Luz’s eyes are shining and the glow of her skin in the morning sunlight. “And um, how did your mom react?”

Luz laughs again, clearly reminiscing, “She was mad at first— well, maybe not mad, more just….. territorial? She didn’t like the idea of me having another parental figure, especially after my dad died but…. she really came around once she saw how Eda helped me stay in school and kept me on the right track.”

Amity smiles, “It sounds like you were like…. meant to be in each other’s lives.”

For a moment she thinks that Luz is going to respond with something endearing but she keeps more or less quiet at the comment, like she’s thinking on Amity’s last words.

After some time as the ambient sounds hum between the two, Luz asks, “Do you believe in destiny?”

Amity breathes out, thinking on the question. It is no doubt something she’s been forced to be aware of for most of her life. It’s then that her mom’s voice rings in her head saying You’re going to do great things for the Blight family and Darling, you’re destined to be the heir of the Blight Family Fortune as long as you stay powerful, obedient and stick to your studies. The thoughts make her physically cringe.

Destiny has always been synonymous with the power and control her parents have had over her more or less her whole life. No personal choices could be made in the pursuit of success, it had to be for her destiny. So in abstract, yes, she could believe in destiny, but that would meant her parents are gods, controlling the pieces in the fucked up mind game that is her life. The thought is debilitating.

“Depends on your definition. I don’t like the idea that no matter what you do, the result of your life would be the same.” Amity shrugs off the anxiety at the thought of her mother, “Especially if you don’t like where you’re destined to end up.”

She more or less is talking about her actual home life situation but Luz doesn’t seem to catch that, which Amity is thankful for. Amity doesn’t think talking about her intense anger for her mother would really be helpful when Luz is barely holding it together about her own.

Luz adjusts again, putting her knees to her chest,  “I like the idea that the universe brings people together and they get to choose what to do with their lives.”

“I like that idea too.”

—— —— 

When Amity gets to what looks like the edge of Eda’s driveway, her phone reception is on one bar. She thanks the stars that her map didn’t freeze or that she didn’t get lost because Luz has been sound asleep for more than an hour now. Amity just hasn’t had the heart to wake her up or ask if they were in the right place. The emotional part of her brain that knows Luz could use the sleep totally beat her logical brain that knows that Luz could really be helpful, directionally.

As she starts pulling into the driveway, she can’t help but compare it to the feeling of coming home. The long stretch before reaching her parent’s manor usually gives her enough time to regret the drive all together, but this time it’s filled with much more certainty and assurance in her decision to help Luz.

Eda’s house sits on a lot of land it seems, and Amity thinks about how Luz used to wander and play in these woods against her better judgment. She ends up thinking about how grateful she is that Eda was kind enough to take care of her, considering the countless stories her own parents told about the evils that live off the beaten path. Probably one of many things her parents are, yet again, so wrong about.

When Amity sees the end of the driveway as she pulls up, the house she sees is totally different than what she expects. The house before her is quant, homey and lively. Potted plants litter the driveway and what looks to be the porch. The sound of wind chimes and bells on bird houses which hang on clotheslines can be heard through the car. It’s all extremely charming, and Amity hasn’t seen anything like it.

When Amity finally reaches the edge of the driveway, she parks next to an old rusted car with patches of exposed metal beneath the paint. And despite the bumpy parking job, Amity finds that Luz is somehow still sound asleep. 

After turning off the car, Amity turns to look at Luz, who’s eyelashes flutter with every breath. It’s weird, she’s driven her friends countless times, has gone on road trips before where they’ve fallen asleep, but never has she had the urge to watch the ways sleep has a hold on them in the ways she feels for Luz. Amity can’t help but focus on the way the sun hits her golden skin, nearly shining in the car. The more she looks the more the colors blend, transforming Luz into what Amity can only think looks like a beautiful renaissance painting. She stays there watching until she hears her own heartbeat pound in her head. She eventually snaps herself out of the trance, worried that the sound will wake Luz.

In an effort to not look like a total creep and to make sure they’re actually at Eda’s and not some random person’s house, she decides to finally wake Luz up. Amity tries not to let her guilt eat her alive at this point.

She puts a hand on Luz’s shoulder and gives her a gentle shake before saying “Hey, I think we’re here.” 

It takes a few moments before Luz is yawning and rubbing her eyes, mumbling something about dreaming the entire car ride. She sleepily turns to Amity, who is staring right at her. Amity definitely thinks the morning sun suits her well. “Good morning.” Luz mumbles more clearly.

“Morning, sleepyhead.” Amity can’t help the words that fall from her mouth. She blames it on being tired. 

They stare at each other a bit longer than Amity knows is appropriate. Before she can interrupt them both, Luz says, just above a whisper, “Thank you.”

Amity wants to say that she’d do it again in a heartbeat but she stops herself from going deeper down that line of thought this morning, and instead settles with, “You’re always welcome.”

They both get out of the car and grab their bags, and once Amity is out of the driver’s seat, it feels like her knees are jello and her eyes are weighted. She’s doing her best to keep it all together but knows sooner or later that she is going to crash. She follows Luz, who is walking quickly to the front door. She seems eager but Amity thinks it comes from the anxiety Luz must inevitably feel.

They find themselves in front of a door that Amity has never seen before. A circular window on the door itself has a mosaic of what looks to be an owl. They stand on an old door mat that says “Come back with a warrant”. Luz knocks heavily and a dog can be heard barking inside. While initially, the dog sounds angry, the barks get more and more excited, likely as it must realize Luz is at the door. Amity is not usually around animals so the experience is a bit jarring.

Luz must sense Amity’s anxiety because she quickly responds, “Don’t worry! That’s just King. He’s pretty sour at first, but once he warms up to you he’s the sweetest little dude.” Luz gives her a quick nudge and a wink, “I’m sure he’ll like you.” After some time and no answer, Luz knocks on the door firmly again, saying “EDA OPEN UP.”

Amity feels herself more and more anxious as time goes on. For a multitude of things, the dog, the fact that Eda is taking an abnormally long time to answer the door, and most of all she’s not sure if any of this is normal and she’s gone too long not saying anything to ask.

Eventually enough time passes for what feels like an eternity before Amity hears the handle jiggle, and the main door open. A tall gray-haired woman answers the door, and her toothy grin shines in the darkness of her house. “Geez Kid, with the way you were knocking I thought it was the cops.” She chuckles a bit before ushering them inside. “I put King away because I caught a glimpse of Mint Chocolate chip over here through the window and lord knows how that dog would act.” She winks at Amity.

Everything is really intimidating for Amity but Luz seems to be immediately relieved of the anxieties and stressors of hours ago. It’s so clear she needed this. Luz gives Eda a long hug before they fully enter, mumbling something that Amity can’t quite understand. The moment gives Amity an opportunity to look closer at the porch.

The porch itself is much more charming and endearing from up close. It’s clear that Eda seems to take care of her plants well, because all the greenery outside is thriving. Along with so many rocks and knick knacks that are rusted, are various crystals and geodes. It makes Amity think of her parent’s house, which is perfectly groomed daily by gardeners, and that no amount of beautiful, confined chaos could exist in the same ways it does here. It intimidates her as much as it draws her in.

Amity is quickly pushed out of her trance when Luz grabs her hand and pulls her inside. Once inside, Eda’s already sitting on a big chair staring back at them as they fully enter the house. Amity does her absolute best to avoid eye contact, and she does this by looking around the room; Eda has a really maximalist aesthetic, it seems, with knick knacks and decorations spanning every corner and inch of usable space in the house. Amity thinks about how even if you knew where everything was, you’d still be able to find something new.

Luz eventually pulls Amity in to sit on a large couch in front of Eda. She doesn’t fully let go of Amity’s hand by the time they both sit down, and Amity is still a bit too intimidated to say or do anything about it.

“Luz, kid, you gotta tell me when you’re bringing someone over, I gotta tidy up.” Eda gestures to the whole room around them.

“Eda, you don’t tidy up.”

“It’s more of a mental tidying, like brooms in the brain.” Eda points to her head and adjusts her seat before looking directly at Amity and likely at their enclosed hands. “So are you gonna introduce me to your girlfriend, Luz or am I gonna have to pick her brain myself?”

It’s that exact moment that Luz must realize their hands are still interwoven because she jerks herself away so quickly like she’s touched something molten. “G-Girlf— NO, Eda it’s not— Amity is my friend. She saw me….” She sighs, “She saw me after our call last night, and offered to help.”

While Luz speaks, Amity sits as politely as she can and moves both of her hands to her knees. She feels herself going beet red at Eda’s comment but she doesn’t have room to care because the feeling of sitting in front of an adult, anticipating punishment is overwhelming. She stays silent and waits for permission to speak, and doesn’t break her gaze on Eda. This is what she’s been taught to do.

“I didn’t mean to scare you both.” Eda looks directly at Amity and her gaze is unwavering. “Cucumber, thanks for taking care of my kid while she’s at college.”

Amity nods and then looks to the floor, “Yes, of course, Mrs. Eda.”

“Well then! Ah, Luz what’s that phrase your mom always says?” Eda gets up and starts walking to what looks to be the kitchen “Mi casa is your casa? Yeah, something like that. I’m gonna start fixing up breakfast so feel free to put your shit away.” Eda’s voice carries on from the kitchen, while the symphony of clanging pots, clattering pans and glittering silverware echo through the house.

Amity starts to dissociate after a while, feeling a mixture of anxiety and exhaustion control her brain. She finds herself staring at nothing in particular and struggles to find a cohesive thought as the pair are left to their own devices. Still, she sits and waits for Eda to excuse her.

A hand waves in front of her eyes and she snaps out of it. “Amity? Are you ok?”

No, she’s not, but doing her best to keep it all together. “Yeah, thanks. Just tired. Don’t wanna get you in trouble.”

“Trouble?” She sees Luz kneel in front of her, gold eyes looking right at her. Amity does her best to avoid them. “Why would we be in trouble? Did you wanna come and put our stuff away?”

Amity doesn’t nod, but simply says, “I’m waiting on Eda to excuse me.”

Luz puts her hand on Amity’s knee and it feels like it’s burning her, and despite the feeling, she doesn’t change her posture. She does look at Luz though, who simply says, “Oh, you’re okay! We can totally head to my room.” Luz gets up, using Amity’s knee as leverage before outstretching her hand, offering to help Amity up off of the couch.

While normally Amity wouldn’t dare be tempted by any hand to leave before being formally dismissed, none of this feels normal. 

She waits a moment, hesitating, before grabbing Luz’s hand.

—— —— 

Luz’s room is not as messy as Amity was expecting just given the general state of Eda’s house, but is surprised by all of the personal touches and wonders how much time she’s spent growing up and being herself in this room. It’s small, probably the size of one of many Blight Manor’s walk-in closets, but Luz has made it really homey with posters, trophies and figurines littered around the room. There’s a dog toy that’s been massacred on the floor when they get in, as toy fluff is nearly everywhere in the room.

Luz apologizes for the mess and idly starts to clean up. She talks about her room while doing so and points out her bookshelf, containing what seems to be dozens of books about Witchcraft, its history and alternative medicines. It’s a nice moment, and Amity is just happy she’s not being asked to speak. She fears that if she opens her mouth she won’t be able to stop what comes out. Still, she can’t help but wear her emotions on her face, she just hopes Luz is too preoccupied to notice. 

Amity’s silence must be deafening, because Luz is really trying to fill the space. While Amity herself wouldn’t mind the silence, and in fact, finds a lot of peace in it, it feels like it’s making Luz uncomfortable, because she’s rambling on and on about things that Amity is trying her best to focus on but can’t quite follow out of sheer exhaustion. Amity sits on Luz’s bed in an effort to be casual once her bags are put down and Luz wanders around her room aimlessly cleaning. 

While she definitely tries her best to keep her eyes open as Luz is talking, Amity feels time warp, bend and suspend in front of her. Luz’s voice is fading in and out, and she doesn’t quite know if she’s been responding, she isn’t conscious enough to fully care. 

—— —— 

Amity’s eyes slowly flutter open to a ceiling she barely recognizes and briefly looks around to find she is in an empty room. In an effort to figure out just how long she’s been sleeping and how much time has passed, she scrambles for her phone but when she presses the power button, the battery insignia shows up. Figures.

As much as she wants to marinate in bed because the one she’s in is pretty damn cozy, she pushes herself to sit up and give her brain a minute to catch up. She can’t help but feel a bit embarrassed to think she just knocked out while Luz was talking, and she’ll have to apologize for the uncouth behavior at some point.

Not to mention the thought of falling asleep in Luz’s bed causes her mind to start spinning. In an immediate effort to break whatever train of thought she’s about to have, she rushes out of bed and makes her way downstairs where she can hear ambient chatter between who she can only imagine to be Eda and Luz. She tries her best to tiptoe down the stairs out of anxiety, but also not wanting to disturb anything, not even the house. Still, she finds herself creaking with every step.

By the time she makes it to the bottom of the stairs, a black dog with white specks is hard-staring at her standing on the bottom step. He’s… wagging his tail? that’s a good sign, right? She has no clue.

Amity tries to be bold by squeezing past him but in her ungraceful maneuver, her foot gets caught on a rug. She trips and falls face first into the floor with a thump and one big “OOF”. This no doubt can be heard by Eda and Luz who both come running out from deeper in the house to the front of the stairs, where Amity lies face first on the ground, with King triumphantly sitting on her back. 

“Amity!!! Are you ok?” Luz rushes up to her kneeling near her, and can be heard shushing and moving King off of her completely. 

Amity feels herself just beet red from the embarrassment and attention, she mumbles into the rug, “Yes, totally fine. Just uh, dying from embarrassment, I think.” She moves her hands to the sides of her face and feels how warm she is, no doubt feeling heat rise to her ears too. Ouch.

“Kid, are you just gonna stare at her? Help her up and make sure she’s square, yeah?” Eda chuckles a bit, beckoning to Luz, who then pats Amity’s back before gently grabbing her arms and helping her up. 

Amity is indeed very red and dusts herself off before following Luz into what looks to be a closet, or bathroom, of some sort. It becomes clear that it’s a hybrid once she’s inside and is beckoned to sit on the lid of a toilet while Luz quickly turns around and starts rummaging through a medicine cabinet, mumbling something about her taking a rough fall. 

Amity has been waited on her entire life. She’s had servants, medical staff and nannies all throughout her life to take care of her in moments like these but for some reason, with Luz something about it feels…. uncomfortable. She shifts awkwardly in the seat, “I’m sorry about that, er. Not my finest moment.” 

Luz immediately snaps around to look at Amity, eyes furrowed a bit before smiling, “Happens to the best of us, I’m just glad you’re ok!” Luz starts leaning in a bit and staring at some part of Amity’s face, but Amity doesn’t want to make eye contact and yet again feels her face getting warm. 

Luz must notice because she puts a hand on Amity’s shoulder, likely in an effort to reassure her. “I’m just making sure you have no bumps or scratches, or gnarly bugs hanging around.” Luz pauses, “You have a tiny bump but besides that, you—Everything looks good.”

Amity brings a hand to her forehead where she feels a bit of pressure and slight pain. She winces, feeling a headache coming on. “Hey, hey, no touching!” Luz chuckles a bit before grabbing Amity’s hand and gently moving it from her forehead, “I used to be so reckless growing up, so I am no stranger to the must-touch-wound club. My mom would say something like, ‘Mija, you’re just bringing more pain to yourself.’” she shrugs off what looks to be her reminiscence, “So no touching. You feeling ok?”

Amity smiles softly before groaning, “I think so, I just can’t believe what a fucking disastrous impression I’ve left on Eda. It’s, like, bad , Luz.”

Amity feels Luz squeeze her hand in what she, yet again would like to think is a reassuring gesture, “If it’s any consolation, she does think your hair is cool.”

The response is oddly hilarious because at least she has that going for her. She laughs, “You know I was considering becoming a part of the floor, and that might’ve just saved me.”

“What do you say about going back out and having a really great redemption arc like Hecate?” Luz says sheepishly, almost as if she’s testing the waters with Amity. Luckily for Luz, Amity can’t resist her favorite series being referenced. 

“Only if you help guide me, Azura.” 

The words fall out of Amity’s mouth like a waterfall and the look on Luz’s face makes it all worth it. 

Chapter Text

The rest of Amity’s time at Eda’s is filled with chores, laughter and quality time. Amity learns more about how Eda operates as a moral compass for Luz, challenging her while simultaneously keeping her on the right track, even if the journey or what that looks like is unorthodox. The love between Eda and Luz is something that Amity quickly learns to admire and recognizes is nonexistent within her own life and family. The love immediately feels…. reciprocal to her when she sees them interact, whereas every dynamic in her family is centered around how other people benefit the individual; it’s transactional in the grand scheme of things, and there is always a cost.

It feels scary to make the comparison because it almost makes things tangible and concrete, which weighs so heavy on Amity’s mind. She keeps the feelings to herself the rest of the weekend so she can focus on helping around the house and supporting Luz, like she intended from the beginning. By the end of the weekend, Amity is convinced she’s salvaged her reputation with Eda, made an impression on King, and most important to her, helped Luz when she needed it.

Luz makes a point to thank her profusely the night before they leave from a nest on the floor that she made for herself out of blankets and spare pillows. Amity understands extending grace, it’s something that has been instilled within her from an early age. And so, she gives Luz the kind of responses she would want to hear, and reassurance is bountiful.

Amity can’t help but notice how shy Luz looks from under the covers of her fort, with only her bright golden eyes and curly wisps of brown hair peeking out from under the covers. It’s adorable. 

Amity feels guilt bubble to the surface with all of the hospitality she’s been shown throughout the weekend, something she doesn’t quite feel she deserves after her initial impression on Eda. So, when she’s offered Luz’s super comfy bed it almost feels like an insult brought out of pity. She finds herself leaning into the unknown though, and selfishly wanting more, wishing to be closer to Luz, a want she has yet to properly place or name. 

Her feelings stay in the back of her throat, and finds that every word she says to Luz is softer because of it.

Friends aren’t supposed to want these kinds of things, right?

At approximately 2:17am, Amity calls out for Luz. 

Luz mumbles, voice low and scratchy from sleep. She calls back.

“Can’t sleep. Come here.” Amity whispers, uncertainty and shame evident in her tone. She is fearful of the shaking in her own voice, and brings a nervous hand to her heart.

For a moment she thinks Luz is sound asleep and that she can forget the totally unreasonable break in her resolve, but then hears blankets rustle on the ground for what feels like the longest minute of her life.

Amity makes sure that she is facing the wall so that even in the dark she doesn’t have to face being rejected. And if she’s honest with herself, she feels like an uncontrollable mess and that she’s made a huge mistake asking Luz to wake. And just as quickly as those thoughts enter her brain, she feels Luz crawl into bed with her, uttering sleepy mumbles, none of which Amity can actually decipher. 

Her heart lurches when she feels Luz’s body against her own, but she stops breathing when she feels Luz’s arm slip over her torso, pulling them close.

Suddenly everything is incredibly warm.

When Luz falls asleep, Amity’s mind circles around the many things she wants to say but never does.

—— ——

They don’t talk about it. Amity prefers it that way. 

On the drive home, Amity learns Luz is good at a lot of things but sharing how she feels openly and honestly is not one of them. She can empathize, in a way, she’s been doing that her entire life, so it’s not an unfamiliar experience. However, Luz speaks and fills the air with what comes to her mind as a shield for how she really feels. It almost seems like she banks on others not to really notice her in all the noise.

Amity scrawls a mental note. 

Action and questions really break Luz down, she finds out, and it takes nearly half the ride back to campus for Amity to get Luz to share how she felt about going to see Eda. She imagines how small the car must feel when you’re backed into a corner. 

While she normally would feel bad about asking so many invasive questions, Luz doesn’t exactly give an indicator that any of the things she’s been asked is unwanted. She presses on.

“Honestly, I really do feel better. I just can’t help but feel like I made the wrong decision coming to college, and being so far away.” Luz finally says with a choke in her voice. “Am I a bad person for leaving? I just would… would never forgive myself if…. if…”

Luz doesn’t finish, but she doesn’t have to.

 “It sounds to me like you feel responsible for everyone around you.” Amity turns her head to Luz briefly, and sees her wiping tears into the sweater she’s wearing. “That’s a lot to carry with you.” Amity pauses a while, letting some silence hang between them before saying, “And just for the record, I don’t think I could ever think you’re a bad person.”

The last statement Amity shares elicits a sob from Luz, who seems absolutely broken at the reassurance. 

Amity opts for boldness and grasps one of Luz’s hands in her own, fingers interlocking like the familiar feeling of coming home, except, it’s more or less what she imagines home feels like. She again tries not to think too much about it. 

And while normally, Amity would find herself feeling awkward next to someone who is sobbing, she finds that it’s probably a comforting gesture to be left alone for a while to just sit and feel and not have to say anything. Amity nurtures the hand in her own while Luz cries nearly the rest of the way home.

By the time they make it back to Luz’s dorm and park, their hands are sweaty, Luz looks so tired, and Amity doesn’t want to leave.

“Call me or text me if you need anything, doesn’t matter the time, ok?” Amity says with the window rolled down. Trees rustle around them, playing a symphony.

Amity watches Luz walk back to her dorm and just before she enters the front door, she turns around, gives the biggest wave and then points down to her phone.

Amity scrambles to find her phone in the car that’s somehow lodged itself in between the seat of the car and the cupholder. Just how the fuck did that happen?

When Amity grabs her phone, she sees a text from Luz and immediately drops it again. 

[3:26pm] Luz 🤗: The Hecate to my Azura TY for everything

Amity turns 26 shades of red, heart reacts to the message, and quickly turns to see that Luz has already gone inside.

She rolls up the window and drives off, knuckles white on the steering wheel.

—— ——

When Amity gets back to her apartment the first thing she does is rush into her room and scream into her pillow. 

Being alone means she can finally sit down and collect her thoughts, something that’s been pushed to the side since she’s started college. Something about the whole Luz-calling-her-Hecate-thing amongst everything else feels extremely…. vulnerable , to say the least.

She picks at the black gloss of her fingernails out of anxiety and thinks about how with every interaction she’s had with Luz, that she’s peeled back the awful layers of protection she’s been hiding behind for years. It’s good to be seen for once but damn does she feel ugly.

The only familiar feeling that she can think of is peering into the mirror every morning just after waking up. It’s sobering to hate the person looking back at you.

She wonders if Luz saw who she does every morning, would they still be friends?

Friends.

Deep down, Amity knows that there’s nothing about the way they interact that is indicative of being just friends but frankly she finds comfort in the trenches of her mind, dodging every thought that says she should probably stop or say something. She likes being in limbo. 

If she acknowledged her feelings, would she actually like who she looks back at in the mirror? Would her friends and family like who they see?

Family.

Mom.

Mom.

A rush of anxiety takes hold when Amity realizes she never called or texted her mom back. Fuck.

Amity scrambles for her phone, nervous fingers thumb in her mom’s number that she knows by heart but wishes to forget.

It rings once and the buzz of her mom’s fluorescent office lights fill her ear.

“My youngest disappointment finally decides to call. To what do I owe the pleasure?”

Ah, yes the familiar sting is there too.

“Sorry. I lost track of time and I meant to—“

“I don’t think I asked for an excuse, Dear. You are to answer any and all correspondence with you. Being away at school doesn’t change that.” The hiss of her voice that comes through the phone makes Amity wince. “You’re lucky your father and I are so generous, it would be a shame if money stopped flowing, wouldn’t it, Amity?”

Already feeling defeated, she replies, “Yes, ma’am.”

“Now, where was I?” Odalia hums, “Your father and I are hosting a networking event this weekend to raise money and awareness for the corporate conglomerate. I expect there will be no distractions or anything delaying your arrival back to the manor.” she pauses, sighing, “Can I trust you to be there and be a good representation of Blight Industries, or should I send one of your father’s robots out in your stead?”

Amity’s brain hovers over the thought that says she should just end the call. “I-I’ll be there.” Amity settles for gripping the phone harder.

“Good girl. I’m glad you inherited a fraction of your father’s brain or else you’d be useless .” The words feel like they come through the phone and idle in the room around her, swirling around and taking a hold onto Amity. Odalia hums again, “Now, there is one thing you should know. One of our valued partners has a son, and I want you to make nice with him on Saturday. I’ll send you a brief.”

Another wave of anxiety hits Amity with intense force, and she speaks before she thinks, “But Mom I—“ 

And just as she opens her mouth she’s interrupted, “I don’t think I asked for your opinion. You know what I want to hear from you, child .” Her voice spitting through the phone line, corroding whatever hope Amity had left.

“Yes ma’am.”

“Lastly, whatever distraction you’re having at school that the twins so graciously shared about. End it.”

Before Amity can even respond, she hears her mother end the call. If Amity could sink further into the bed and into the ground, she would.

And a violent sob rips through her like a beast in the night and she lies in her bed hugging herself to sleep.

Amity thinks about how small she feels in a universe her mom has so expertly crafted and curated.

Chapter Text

Seemingly endless stairs fill the view of whoever lay eyes on Amity’s fortress. The sheer scale is massive, as wide as it is ominous and tall enough to touch the gods. Each stair ahead is adorned with broken crystals, worn with time and aged by element and experience. If one looked too long it threatened to fall apart all together.

When Amity thinks of the structure, she consistently places herself at the bottom of the steps. It’s where she belongs, her mother would probably say. Too little resolve to make it to the top, and too weak to endure the conditions necessary for progress. So how could she dare place herself anywhere other than the bottom in her own vision?

The journey to the top is something she has tried to complete her entire life; a journey that she has failed every time. 

Was she ultimately responsible for its dilapidation? 

At the top of the monument sits a lonely throne made of tungsten. It looks smooth at first but hides a deadly secret once it’s touched. Contact with Flesh and bone, it transforms into a mechanism that brings harm, consuming itself, and transmogrifying the fool who dare think themself worthy of a seat. At least, that’s what she’s heard, she’s never actually made it to the throne. It is terrifying as it is alluring.

Empty it sits, taunting Amity.

She places her self portrait onto the wall of the Art Studio only to realize most of the class went very literal with their self portraits. A sea of endless faces hang before her, each one blending into the next as she realize she can’t even place faces to names of those in the class. She feels like she’s done too much too wrong, again.

Just before she heads into a spiral of self doubt, anxiety and frustration, she takes a look at what she can only assume to be is Luz’s drawing because there is a neon yellow post it note with a small smiley face and the name “LUZ”. Amity smiles at the sloppy penmanship and can’t help but feel less alone when she looks at the drawing.

Luz’s self portrait is scrawled in a perfect blend of effortless messy yet intentional that Amity could never achieve. It’s impressive, in its very own Luz kind of way. Then again, so many things about her seem to be. 

Luz’s drawing depicts what looks to be a silhouette in the center of the page: colorful, bright, and vibrant, made with what looks to be multiple mediums. The person themself is surrounded by a deep charcoal cloud that seeps into every corner of the page, giving the illusion that it’s creeping outward endlessly. Luz’s assignment makes Amity think on her place in the world that Luz crafted, and she nods, aspiring not to be a part of its darkness.

Deep in thought while staring at Luz’s self portrait, she feels a nudge to her side that makes her jump, squeaking at the sudden contact. “Hi.” The voice says.

Amity turns to see Luz, already standing extremely close to her, bumping shoulders this time. “Hey, it’s good to see you.” Amity says, smiling back softly. “I…. I really like your drawing.”

Luz bumps her again, and Amity’s heart lurches. “You’re sweet! I really liked yours too! Cryptic, but nice! I didn’t know you were such the arteeeeest, Blight.” Luz leans in, winking before backing away and rubbing the back of her neck. Amity tries not to notice the way her wavy hair cascades down her neck after the gesture. Amity gulps.

Hearing her own last name ends up stinging way more than it normally would but she knows it’s not Luz’s fault. Still, her face falls at the comment and Luz more than definitely notices, eyebrows furrowed immediately in concern. 

Moments before Amity thinks Luz is going to say something, the professor beckons the attention of the class. Amity feels a mixture of relief and sadness wash over her.

The rest of class goes relatively smoothly, with Amity paying as much attention to class as she realistically can with a cute girl next to her bouncing her leg and passing notes back and forth to her.

Something about it all seems so juvenile, but she is quickly reminded of how clouded her judgement is with her mother’s looming threats in the air. Luz doesn’t deserve that.

So she replies to every note, feeling selfishly emboldened that no matter what she does, she will always be her mother’s disappointment.

“HEY ARE U OK?”

“yes. bad brain day”

“:( DID I SAY SOMETHING WRONG EARLIER?” 

“no omg not your fault.” Amity hesitates, then draws a tiny heart. 

“CAN I HELP IN ANY WAY?”

“you can help by paying attention to class dork :P :) :) :)”

“HERE ILL MAKE A DEAL”

“? :o” Amity is intrigued. 

“ILL PAY ATTENTION TO CLASS IF YOU HOLD MY HAND YES VERY GOOD DEAL :)”

When Amity reads the note she smiles and feels her cheeks go pink, with her ears quickly following suit. She wants to see Luz’s expression without being totally obvious but instead brings her hands to her warm cheeks, trying to cover them as much as she is able to. There’s no way Luz wouldn’t notice.

And if Luz does notice, she doesn’t say anything. Thank fuck.

It all makes Amity think about how much Luz must like their improvised song and dance too.

Luz slides the note back to her, “I PROMISE I DONT BITE” with a cute drawing of a shark with its mouth open and rounded teeth.

Amity smiles and finally looks to Luz, who has tucked her left arm under the table in what looks to be anticipation for Amity’s hand. How bold to assume she’d accept.

She accepts just a second later.

“i like your shark” and in the smallest handwriting Amity is able to write, she says “and ok yes deal”

Amity’s hand slips underneath the table to complete her end of the deal and hold Luz’s hand. In true Amity fashion, she fumbles for a bit until she feels the familiar softness of Luz’s hand. Gentle fingers interlock and Amity is reminded of how their hands fit together so nicely.

She also can’t believe how easily Luz could pull her from her own education. This is totally so Luz can pay attention, right?

Right.

She doesn’t fool herself.

In what Amity would like to believe is a comforting gesture from Luz, feels a gentle thumb across the top of her palm.

It’s nice, way too nice. So nice that all her mind does for the rest of class is circle around Luz and how thoughtful she was in asking to hold her hand to comfort her and pay attention. While Luz looks like she’s paying extra attention to the professor, hand in hand, Amity can’t focus at all. Amity feels her heart pounding and wonders if the whole class can hear. 

She knows that she shouldn’t be doing any of this and how she is consistently jeopardizing her education when she leans into the unknown that is Luz, but she can’t help indulging when Luz is so sweet. 

Besides, pretending she’s straight to herself and everyone in her life is getting really fucking exhausting and she knows that when she faces her mother at some point, she’ll have to repress everything she’s feeling right now for the sake of her family and her future. If she is going to play by her moms rules, she at least wants a say in her life when she’s not watched nearly 24/7. Still, she worries that she should exercise a bit more caution. Is it too bold to be holding hands in class on a random Tuesday? 

Given her mom’s general demeanor, she doesn’t even want to think about sharing her feelings about anyone to her parents, especially about a girl. They’ve done nothing but show their disgust for queer people, she’s sure she would be disowned by her mother and ridiculed by her well-intentioned father. None of which sounds like anything she wants to be dealing with, and breaking down the “totally straight yep i love boys” persona she’s so expertly crafted is a threat to her safety. Compartmentalization, dissociation and deflection have been her biggest allies.

Then again, maybe it would be a good thing to be disowned by her family, ridding herself of the Blight name and expectations. If she’s such a disappointment, why is she trying so hard to uphold a reputation for a family who shows her no care? If she’s already a failure, can anything really change how her parents feel about her? 

The twins seem to have dug themselves out of their reputational rut by throwing Amity under the bus at every turn, and the worst part is, they don’t seem to fully care. Which leaves nobody in her corner except for herself. 

The thought makes her realize what a lonely life she’s been set up to lead. 

As she falls further down the depressing rabbit hole that reminds her that she is indeed, alone, everything around her is suddenly really loud and a symphony of ambient mumbles surrounds around her. Amity quickly realizes she’s been aimlessly thinking throughout the entire class that she truly doesn’t even know how the hour and a half managed to pass without her noticing.

Just as she’s about to have a mental breakdown, she sees a notebook get pushed in front of her, and Luz says “Hey, don’t worry, I took notes all class so you don’t have to. You looked really…. deep in thought so I thought I’d help out.”

Feeling Luz’s eyes on her, she squeezes the hand in hers and does her best to hold back tears that well up in her eyes. “I really don’t know what I’d do without you, right now. Thank you.”

Luz laughs, hearty and kind, “No problem, I actually feel like I learned something, so…. totally worth it!”

“I’m so glad I could help.” Amity pauses, doing her best to build up courage, “It sounds like you’ll be doing business with me again?” Amity jokes but then realizes the implications of her words. 

Amity lets go of the hand in her own and tries to fight the blush that inevitably forms.

“If it gets you to smile and joke with me then it’s a deal every single time.” Luz’s words are way sweeter and way more real than Amity ever expects from her.

Oh no, Amity is smitten.

———

Luz somehow convinces Amity to get lunch on campus. Saying something about feeling better with food down their gullets as Luz makes the most questionable-looking eating gesture Amity has ever seen which manages to catch the eyes of all passers-by. Apparently Gus has some free time and can hang out too. While Amity from the get go wants to say no and just wallow in bed, Luz practically begs her to. 

It, like most things with Luz, doesn’t take much convincing.

Eventually they get to a open pavilion on campus with so many seats and even more people. Lunch hour takes a hold on campus and it seems like everyone is out of class by the time they get there. Ambient talking fills the air and Amity thinks it sounds like buzzing, the whole area practically vibrating with energy. Eventually after plenty of mumbling while Luz looks at her phone, trying to figure out just where in the hell Gus is, Amity sees him out of the corner of her eye. She taps Luz’s shoulder and the pair makes their way to a table Gus occupies.

As they get closer, Amity notices that the table doesn’t have any food on it but has what looks to be little figurines, some of which are toppled over, others standing in a perfect line. Before she can continue analyzing, she sees Gus look up from the comically large book he’s reading, and dark grey eyes looking back at hers for a moment and he immediately smiles. “You guys made it!”

Luz pulls out a chair in front of Gus and it makes a horrendous sound before plopping into the seat, “Yeah I didn’t realize things would be so hectic, but, new school year new everyone? I guess?”

Amity sits down at the side of the table and nervously plays with the hem of the black shirt she’s wearing. “So… Gus, what, exactly, are you working on?”

He practically falls out of his seat as he looks to Amity, excitement palpable across the table. “I’m so glad you asked!” He slams his hand across the giant book on the table “THIS. Is the ultimate guide to DND. I’m DMing this weekend, so I’m doing some prep in between my classes.”

Amity winces for a second, not really understanding half of the words Gus uses. Luz must notice and says, “Gus, Amity’s not a uber nerd like us, you gotta help her out.”

“Right! A newbie. As an honorary member of my guild as an esteemed guest of Luz’s, you are granted education privileges. Basically I’m just the one who is hosting a game this weekend with people from our dorm.”

Amity nods her head very slowly, getting the gist, but still not understanding much. “So you host…err… what exactly?”

Gus smiles wider, “A session, basically, I help guide players through a story I crafted, so that includes fighting monsters, side quests…” he looks to Luz, smirking “The occasional love story.” He laughs, taunting her, “You should totally pop by this weekend, check things out for yourself. And who knows, maybe you’ll even play some day!”

Gus’ last words snap Luz out of whatever notable embarrassment she was feeling and she nearly leans over the table towards Amity, “OH PRETTY PLEASE, it would be so fun!” Lux stands up, straightening her back as if she’s a hero, “I’ll be playing Luzura, human-turned-witch who is her own worst enemy. Catch her on her bad side though and she may just destroy you with her wits.”

Amity smiles at her being so excited, she can see why her and Gus get along so well. “So what do you think, Amity? Care to join us this weekend for an action packed adventure full of magic, terror, and might!?” Gus says proudly.

She smiles kindly at both of them sort of posing back at her, “As much as I’d like to learn about what exactly you two are talking about, I can’t.” Amity looks to the figures on the table and feels a rush of hurt flow through her for a moment, not able to fully place where it’s coming from. “I have a family thing I’m expected to attend.”

Gus shared a sympathetic look before saying, “Ah, bummer. Well, you’re invited to every session, so even if you can’t come this weekend I’m sure we can figure something out. Besides, this just means we can take the time to figure out your character!”

She appreciates Gus’ rose tinted glasses but they quickly shatter when she realizes she needs to see her mother this weekend. Still, Gus is being really thoughtful and polite. “Yeah, that would be fun, even if right now I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

Luz waves her hand a bit, “I’m sure you’ll pick it up fast, AND it’ll be really cool to see what character you come up with. Gus has this really cool world built out already and he’s building on it, like, as we speak.”

The compliment is so casual Amity almost misses it, but finds herself smiling at the pair of friends. She finds as she is quickly in thought, that they both launch into this dorky tirade about the world Gus has managed to build. Amity learns that the world they play in is called the Boiling Isles, and that magic exists everywhere in that world. You also get to be whatever you want to be, no judgment or questions asked. And while she most certainly misses out on all the politics involved in the world, she takes extra care to listen to Luzura’s place in the world. 

Amity quickly learns that Luzura isn’t actually too far off from Luz, at least, not from a personality standpoint. Sure, they might have different backgrounds and overall aesthetics, but the core of who they are, their motivations seem one in the same. And while Luz doesn’t know what her session this weekend looks like, she seems to be excited about having Luzura discover more about the Boiling Isles and her place in it.

Even though role playing isn’t a thing Amity ever thought she’d do ever, and that if a word of it got back to Boscha would probably cause her to be a social outcast for life, a part of her is deeply curious about what character she would decide to make. Would her character reflect her or just be another form of escapism she loves to engage in? She pushes the question away for another time.

Either way she’s content with listening for now and Amity spends the rest of the afternoon with Gus and Luz before they both have to go to different classes respectively. Amity almost wants to walk with them deeper into campus but knows she’ll be in the same place mentally when they leave, so she says her goodbyes to Luz who smiles at her in the ways she swears is only for her, and to Gus who’s backpack is as big as him, and she heads back to her apartment. 

———

Once inside her apartment, she clicks the door shut behind her. Boscha seems to be on the phone when she gets in but Amity hears her quickly end whatever call she has. “My roommates here— I’ll talk to you later. Yeah, no. Bye.” Amity braces for impact.

Boscha rushes into the room and makes her way over to Amity, pulling her into a tight hug. “There’s my bestie, we totally missed you this weekend.” Amity tries to give the sweetest smile she can muster but it probably looks more pained than anything. “Come.” Boscha gestures to the couch after the hug.

Amity makes her way to the living room couch and plops on it with her legs crossed in an effort to try and get comfortable. It seems like anything having to do with Boscha these days feels uncomfortable.

Boscha sits on the other end of the couch soon after and faces Amity, “So just what was so important you had to ditch us and cancel our dinner plans?”

Amity winces a bit, and Boscha certainly doesn’t mince words as it feels like she’s trying to dig at Amity. “Something happened to my friend Luz’s mom, so I offered to drive her back home, it wasn’t like we planned on just not showing up.”

“You drove? You wouldn’t even do that for me and we’ve known each other for like, so long.” Boscha crosses her arms.

Amity sighs, “Boscha, I totally would and have, it was really unexpected and Luz really needed it. It’s what friends do for one another.”

“What, you’ve known this girl for like 2 weeks and now it’s like you have no time for me, er, me and Skara.” Boscha hisses, clearly upset.

“Boscha, be mad at me, Luz didn’t do anything but have an emergency. I chose to help, I cancelled, not her. I-“ For a moment Amity wants to fight back at the whole “you’ve known her for 2 weeks” comment, but she’s not in the mood to fight when Boscha is already pissed.

“Fine. What about this weekend, can your new friend come over this weekend?” The shift in tone almost takes Amity off guard and it makes her wonder what the rush is to meet Luz so quickly. 

“I cant this weekend, my mom is having a stupid networking event and she insists on me being there and ‘making nice’ with whoever she wants me to be nice with.”

Boscha stares at her, an eyebrow raised, “And what exactly is the problem? You get drunk and flirt with rich boys the whole night. And if you’re lucky enough you get to mess with them, too.” Boscha looks like she’s swooning at the thought, “It’s a win for your parents’ business and definitely a win for you, too.”

Amity starts picking at the hem of her shirt out of nervousness, already not liking where this conversation is going. “And do I look like I have any interest in doing any of those things? Let alone for my mother of all people?” She lets out a huge sigh, “I really just want to sleep in and stay home.”

Boscha laughs, “And what, watch your stupid magic movie for the 5 millionth time?” Come on, you’re in college why not just fuck around when the opportunity presents itself?”

“Honestly watching my stupid magic movie for the 5 million and oneth time seems tons more fun to me than what you’re describing.”

Boscha scoffs while getting up and heading back to her room, “Ugh whatever, if you need opinions on an outfit to wear text me, I’ll be in my room wishing I was going to an exclusive event with the richest men all around.” She looks back at Amity before saying “Toodles!” and closing the door.

Annoying. Amity rolls her eyes before leaning back on the couch and staring at the ceiling, letting out a huge sigh as she focuses on the fan above her. It’s frustrating to know that along with her mother, that Boscha too, is an extension of the pressure she’s under.

She doesn’t even entertain the thoughts that were shared for very long and after plenty of dissociation, Amity heads back to her room, grabbing her backpack and plopping down on her bed. If she’s going to be made fun of for watching Azura might as well really lean into it. She might even consider blasting it too, just so Boscha can hear.

[3:15pm] Amity: Very important question for you.

[3:16pm] Luz 🤗: HII YES ask away 

[3:17pm] Amity: What should I watch

[3:17pm] Amity: The Good Witch Azura or Azura: rise of the fallen kingdom OR

[3:18pm] Amity: the sports special

[3:19pm] Luz 🤗: OH OH AMAZING choices ummmmmmmmmmm

[3:20pm] Luz 🤗: all of them

[3:21pm] Amity: If i watched all of them id never get anything done 😫😫😫

[3:22pm] Luz 🤗: who needs school anyway let’s major in Azura???? 🔮🔮🔮

[3:22pm] Luz 🤗: HMMMM BUT if i had to choose it would be the sports special

[3:23pm] Luz 🤗: only because Hecate and Azura team up and its AMAZING

[3:24pm] Luz 🤗: AND we could rewatch the first movie… together… sometime

[3:25pm] Luz 🤗: IF YOU WANT TO OF COURSE

[3:26pm] Luz 🤗: OK SORRY IM SPAMMING NOW

Amity sits there, just aimlessly smiling at her phone as the texts come through one by one. They read as a type of franticness that she is all too familiar with.

[3:27pm] Amity: please, you’re totally fine. And yes

[3:28pm] Amity: I would like to major in Azura. and also yes

Amity’s breath hitches as she hovers over the send button.

[3:29pm] i do want to watch the first movie with you

And for what feels like the 30th time that week, Amity throws her phone across the bed and quickly covers her molten face with a pillow.

If this is suffering why does it feel so nice?

Chapter Text

Blight Manor is the only place Amity has ever known to be as home. It by no means was a home in any traditional sense of the word, but really a place to sleep and exist. If she’s honest, most of her childhood was spent being crushed under the pressure of her parent’s expectation to be the heir to Blight Industries and maintain a nearly perfect and almost impossible 4.5 GPA. There was no room for love and care that makes being in a home, well, homely.

And while she sure managed throughout her time at Blight Manor, her mental health, individuality and personhood took blow after blow.

Any attempts at pushback against her parents was met with a swift hand of what her parents called “Justice”. At first, it was small things, like her phone being taken away, or no dessert for a day or two. But it eventually evolved into doors being taken away, or hours standing in the corner of her room, where minutes added to her time every time she shuffled her feet or moved her head in any other direction than forward. This, of course was amongst other unique and equally awful punishments to keep her from being so utterly human.

You need discipline, they’d often say together.

You’re not nearly perfect enough, her father would say, expression unchanging and golden eyes seeing right through Amity.

How were we so woefully unlucky to have yet another failure of a child? Her mother would say through gritted teeth and just close enough to Amity’s face to feel the venom.

That last one stung way more than she ever wants to admit. 

And more and more as time passed Amity was whittled down to the mere shell of who she once was. A vessel and a pawn no more than a human. So despite being in college for a couple of weeks so far, the newfound freedom in every sense of the word feels like a lifetime of something she never thought she could ever have. 

And when Amity pulls into the nearly unbearable, long, stretch of driveway of Blight Manor, she is already tearing up. It takes nearly every ounce of strength in her to not turn the car completely around, head back into her apartment, and watch Azura.

Pristine grass sculptures line the pavement along with signs that point to their many areas for parking. It feels so much more clinical than usual that she can’t imagine someone being impressed by everything. Still, she follows the signs and drives up to what she already knows to be the valet area. 

Sitting in the car for a moment, she mentally prepares herself to be as perfect as she can be, even if it’s not what she wants. 

It’s easier that way, she tells herself.

And so, despite every ounce of her intuition telling her to leave, she pulls down the sun visor and quickly checks her makeup before pulling out her phone to peek at her messages before she has to go dark for a bit.

She of course checks Luz’s first because she totally is going to see Em and Ed later right? 

[4:55pm] Luz 🤗: HI HI

[4:55pm] Luz 🤗 im a call away

[4:56pm] Luz 🤗: if u need it ofc

[4:57pm] Luz 🤗: ALSO luzura just got a nat 1 and lost 12 HP TO A TINY RAT 😵

[5:22pm] Amity: lol i only kinda wish i knew what that means

[5:22pm] Amity: jk tell me later? 😊

[5:23pm] Amity: and ty always luzura

With the last message sent to Luz, Amity takes a deep breath before locking her phone and peeling herself out of her car and quickly handing her keys off to a valet driver that she has most definitely seen before. 

“Thank you, Miss Blight.” the valet says with a smile.

“Steve, you’ve known me my whole life you don’t need to be formal with me. Thanks.” She smiles to him as she watches him scramble into the car, mumbling thanks and driving away to one of the many compounds on their plot of land. 

She’s still not quite ready to make her way to the very obvious entry of the event. So instead she decides to sit on the steps towards the top of the stairs. She needs every safety net she can find, both mentally and not. 

Sighing the moment she sits down, she smooths out her sleek black dress and watches as countless faces walk by her. Not a singular one paying any mind to her. The energy is palpable and a general buzz is in the air.

Amity puts her head into her hands, not quite feeling ready to face her mom or do any of the bidding she’s about to ask. And instead, finds her mind aimlessly drifting back to Luz, as it has been these days, and idly wonders how she would fare at an event like this. What would her mother do if she saw them together?

Just as she’s starting to blush at the thought of formal Luz, she hears a voice behind her say, “Well, well, well if it isn’t our baby sister, she looks so deep in thought should we burst her bubble?” Amity considers her bubble burst the second she hears their voices but she doesn’t turn around.

“I think we do Ed.” 

Amity then feels both her older siblings crash land into her back, springing into some sort of sloppy hug before pulling back and sitting on both sides of her. She smiles lightly the whole time. 

As much as they can be a pain and she feels alone, damn she really has missed them. 

“Baby sis you clean up well, I feel like it's been so long since dropping you off at school.” Ed says with his face falling.

Amity takes a moment to look at both of her siblings who are dressed in similar shades of black, dark purple, and silver jewelry. Ed hasn’t done anything super notable to his hair or face, but finds that Em is wearing a full face in makeup and has her hair clipped up and out of her face. She’s looking more and more like their mom these days, “I’ve missed you both too.” 

She finds that she means it.

“How have you been?” Emira says with a smile that Amity reads as genuine. 

She wonders if this is going to end in some sort of trap, so while she is genuinely happy to see them both, a part of her stays on edge. “I’ve been…. okay. Things are weird, living on my own is weird. I still feel like I’m playing catch up, like as things are happening which is new.”

Ed makes a noise to show he’s thinking on her words, whereas Em smiles at her, “I mean, given our upbringing that’s er, understandable.” Amity gives an all knowing glance. Em continues, “Well. That’s ok, you don’t have to have everything figured out yet.”

It’s the most genuine thing she’s heard from Em in a while that just hearing the reassurance garners tears from her that she tries to hide quickly by looking up to the sky. She’s not fooling anyone, though as she can feel the stares of the twins on her.

“Hey, Mittens, is everything ok?” Ed says, eyebrows furrowed in concern.

Amity sighs, “I just… genuinely don’t want to be here. I want to be back at my apartment. I don’t want to face mom, and I definitely don’t want to see who she’s setting me up with.”

It’s weird, she’s never had this many feelings before. Like she has always known they were there, just lulled into submission by her parents and the constant threat she was in. Now that the threat is less looming, her feelings come back in tidal waves. It’s something she could have only mentally braced for but the impact was far more large than she ever have thought she would feel. 

In the face of feelings that bubble to the surface, Ed and Em just sit with her, surprisingly. She almost expects them to walk away and get back to whatever shenanigans they were getting up to, but instead feels their hands on her back as they listen to the mess of feelings that pour out. She tells them about her dynamics with Boscha and how weird that’s been feeling since day one. She talks about how kind and thoughtful Luz has been, and that she’s so grateful to have met her, along with snippets of their friendship so far.

They all sit there for a while, at least until Amity has been able to talk fully about what’s been troubling her as of late. She ends it with, “Thanks for listening. If you two could keep it between us I’d be really thankful.” She sighs knowing this sort of disclaimer comes with the territory of her siblings, because just as thoughtful as they are, their carelessness is equally as strong.

Ed chuckles a bit at the request, but quickly says, “You got it, Mittens.”

“And if he doesn’t got it, I’ll be sure to bonk his head if even a peep comes out to mom or dad.” Em says, smugly and sure of herself. 

“Thank you both.”

They all three end up sighing in unison and it causes them all to laugh at the hilarity of it all. They’re so utterly broken and messy but knowing they at least have each other is really comforting. As much as Amity wants to sit here for the rest of the night, she knows she has to get up and eventually face the evening. She’s exhausted and it’s just started.

She follows Em and Ed as they enter into the building, and is immediately graced by the sounds of music coming through speakers on all sides of the room. She can see crowds of people all over the venue space, some of which she casually recognizes but doesn’t care to remember. If she’s lucky she can just pop in, say hi, and immediately drive home. Her gut tells her she won’t be so lucky though.

Thankfully for her, there’s champagne being passed out everywhere. She ushers a server close by and downs two glasses by the time her siblings give her a sign that their mom is coming up to them. Fast.

Smoothing out her dress as best as she can and straightening up her posture, Amity smiles.

“Greetings children, I suppose you all look generally acceptable this evening.” Odalia says, walking up to them. “I see the twins have thoughtfully taken into consideration our theme for this evening.” She scoffs, and smiles, “Amity, I expected far better from you.”

Amity takes a moment to look at the twins and back to her outfit and realizes the dark purple accents they have are ever present throughout the venue, and ultimately the branding color of Blight Industries. “I didn’t realize the theme. My mistake, it won’t happen again.”

“You would think a star student such as yourself would have been thoughtful, especially on a night as important as this one, but maybe I’m expecting too much from you.” She sighs, “For your sake I wouldn’t dare make that mistake again.”

Amity’s eyes gloss over, she’s used to this. “I won’t, ma’am.”

Odalia starts waving her hands back and forth but pays no mind to the twins, who are now standing behind her. “I have an urgent matter I must discuss with Amity. You two,” she says, looking straight through Amity, but addressing the twins, “try not to be the embarrassments you already are. Your father and I worked hard to bring in such lovely people into one place.”

Amity can’t help but feel the message is for her, too.

A meek, “Yes, mother.” could be heard in unison, before Amity sees the pair walk away into the larger crowd.

And with her safety net gone in the blink of an eye, an anxious feeling washes over her. She wants another drink.

“Now Amity, I would hope you’ve read the brief I had sent over to your apartment.” Odalia says, blue eyes piercing at her.

“I have, Mother.” She hasn’t.

“Good. Then you’ll know a very important family is in attendance this evening. The Belos Family Empire is one of the richest and most powerful families in the country, and they come from old money.”

Amity hesitates, “That’s hm, actually what I wanted to talk to you about.” Odalia sneers at the request.

“Absolutely not. You’re listening. Not talking.” Amity winces, knowing there’d probably be a slap in there if it weren’t for the general crowd around them. “A union with the Belos’ nephew would make us a lot of money and keep our family powerful for decades—centuries even.”

Ah.

Desperate, Amity tries another approach, “B-But i’m an adult and I just started college—“

“And I. Don’t. Care.” Odalia takes a step closer to Amity, rage in her eyes, “You do as you’re told, I don’t need anymore drama from you. Am I understood?”

Defeated, Amity looks to the ground at her feet and takes a moment to stifle the well of tears coming up. “Understood.”

“Good. Now be a good daughter and follow me.”

Without giving Amity a single moment to recover, Odalia ushers them through the crowd, saying pleasantries as they pass by those she seems to recognize. The entire time Amity dissociates, and everything is shut down to its bare minimum.

That is until Odalia flags down people Amity can only narrow down to be the Belos family. She doesn’t consciously realize what’s happening until a boy with shaggy blond hair, deep set eye bags, and a suit on is standing directly in front of her. He looks just as miserable as she does. And when Amity looks around, she realizes her mom and anyone else she recognizes is gone. The only think she can hear is the ambient sound of mingling around them. 

Amity takes a deep breath before realizing she’s gonna have to say something eventually as the boy in front of her shuffles awkwardly. “I don’t think I caught your name?”

“Hunter. You can call me Hunter. And you’re… Amity?” He says, somewhat reluctantly. Amity realizes he must’ve been briefed on her. The thought creeps her out.

“Yeah.” Amity tests the waters, “Can I be honest?”

He shuffles awkwardly again. Not really following her but seemingly intrigued. “Yeah?”

“Ok hm. How do I say this—“ She looks off to the side, “I can never be what both our parents want me to be. And if i’m being honest I have no desire to get there. And look, I get if this sort of, fucks things up royally with our families I just thought—“

Hunter interrupts her, “Look, I’m just following orders.” He hesitates, “But me neither.”

“Oh thank fuck.” Amity sighs out. “This is all a bit too much for me.”

His eyebrows furrow, and when she gets a closer look, she realizes he’s got plenty of scaring on his face. “I just, can’t, make my uncle mad.” She hears something in his voice that scares her too, she recognizes it with her own mom. “You understand, right?”

She does.

After some time Amity learns that they’re basically in the same situation, and while Hunter doesn’t exactly give full disclosure about what he’s going through, she manages to understand the bits and pieces that he does share. She learns that Hunter’s dad passed long ago and his uncle had overtaken as some sort of father figure, but that eventually ends up just being a fancy word for an oppressor. She learns that he, too, is attending Hexside University, but is majoring in Business when he really wants to be in the arts and woodworking. She finds out that he also doesn’t have many choices throughout his life and that despite being a second year at university, nothing has changed about the expectations of his family.

It eerily mirrors her own relationship with hers.

What she has to do in some grand scheme of old money is beyond her, and in between several glasses of champagne, Amity and Hunter talk about making some sort of façade work. She gets her own life, he gets his, and the only time they interact is when they absolutely have to. She finds out that he has been sort of in the beginning stages of talking to someone at the University that he met on Tinder and that he’s afraid of fucking it up with whatever his uncle is expecting him to do.

And after plenty of drinks and her inhibition completely gone, Amity talks about Luz.

It’s scary, but he seems to get it without her having to be specific. And it’s weird to put so much trust into someone with this much power but she doesn’t have a lot of choices here, and it doesn’t seem like he does either.

She grabs his number and feels semi confident about being friends and absolutely nothing more.

That is, if he keeps quiet to his uncle.

The rest of the night really ends up being in momentary snapshots of drinking and moving through the crowd. She ends up drinks so much that everything blurs and bends together after some time.

And after a long time searching the venue, she somehow manages to find Em, who looks at her with shock. “Can’t drive.” Amity says.

Em laughs, “I can see that, Mittens. Let me find Ed and drive you back to your place. Are you feeling ok?”

“Very good, thumbs up, but about mom thumbs down.” She says semi loudly, not really knowing the volume at which she’s speaking.

Em quickly pulls her so that they’re walking together, “Oh, Amity, people can hear you. Let’s just find Ed and get out of here.”

Amity stiffens up, “OH. Sorry.” And puts a hand to her mouth making a zipper motion over her lips.

She throws the imaginary key into the crowd. 

The pair combs through the crowd of people until they find Ed who looks to be in the process of putting post it notes on the backs of those who greet him. 

Amity chuckles, and she hears Em say, “Amity is very drunk. We need to get her home before mom sees. Let’s go.”

“I don’t care if she sees, let her see what she did to her kids.” Amity mumbles, anger coming to the surface.

Ed also rushes to their side and they head out towards the valet, “Time and place baby sis, let’s just focus on getting you out of here.”

And they do. Em and Ed get all the cars situated, and it’s almost as if they were anticipating something like this would happen. Em drives Amity back to her apartment while Ed follows them.

“Look, we… Don’t have to talk about this now, but I wanted to say Ed and I are here for you.” Em looks to Amity really briefly, eyebrows furrowed in concern. “We can get lunch sometime and just talk everything out. I don’t know what mom put you through but it doesn’t seem good.”

Em trails off, Amity looks at her, “Thank you. And Ed, you two are the best ever.” She laughs a bit, “I mean that!”

Em smiles and the rest of the drive is relatively silent, and Emira doesn’t push Amity too hard on the drive home and for that she’s really thankful. She has no idea what time it is, and all she wants to do is be in bed. 

Ed and Em eventually drop her off into the apartment, and when she gets upstairs there’s peace and quiet, which is something she still finds shocking on a weekend night.

When she makes it back to her room the first thing she does is splash water on her face to wake up a bit more. She is still incredibly drunk by the time she does, but thankfully the spin feeling she felt throughout the drive back is over. She looks at herself to find a messy, tired version of herself looking back at her.

After doing her best to clean herself up and putting on some proper pajamas, she finally takes a moment to look at her phone: 11:48pm and tons of messages.

[11:36pm] Ed 💫: We love you mittens sleep well 

[11:37pm] Em ✨: See you soon ok? 

She then sees a text from a new number, and given the content she can assume is Hunter.

[9:05pm] Hunter 🐦: Please don’t tell your mom about anything we talked about

She scoffs at the insinuation and replies.

[11:50pm] Amity: I would rather die i think. I won’t say a word 🤐

The only one she kind of rly cares about though, without fail on her part, is Luz.

[9:30pm] Luz 🤗: HI ok just thinking of you and hope everything is OK

[9:35pm] Luz 🤗: If it’s not pls have this HUMBLE OFFERING a picture of King Eda sent me 😊😊😊😊😊😊🐾

Amity scrolls down to see a picture of King fully on his back next to what looks to be a very extensive pile of semi destroyed toys. It’s one of the cutest things she’s seen.

[9:35pm] Luz 🤗: OH AND DND JUST ENDED AFTER LIKE 5 HOURS.

[9:36pm] Luz 🤗: LUZURA LIVED i can’t wait to tell you about it 

[9:36pm] Luz 🤗: That isssssssss if you still want to listen of course 😭

[9:37pm] Luz 🤗: i don’t want to assume 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

She yet again finds herself fully goofy smiling at all of the messages before taking a totally appropriate amount of time to reply after reading them.

[11:56pm] Amity: Tonight sucked more than i ever thought it would

[11:56pm] Amity: Eda’s pic of king tho for sure cheered me up tho ur the best

[11:56pm] Amity: how is he so fucking cute i’m crying 🥺🥺🥺

Just as Amity is mid crafting her next reply Luz just calls her directly instead. Amity clicks the green accept button very quickly, yearning to speak to her.

“Hi.” Amity croaks out.

“Thought I’d, UH, cut out the middle man! That is, if your free?” Amity hears Luz laugh over the phone, and her stomach flips.

“I'm free, yes. Thanks for asking.” She pauses, “It’s nice to hear your voice.”

“It’s good to hear yours too, Amity.” Luz pauses too, treading carefully it seems. “So, rough night?”

“The fucking worst, Luz.”

“Do you want to talk about it?”

Amity sighs. On one hand, she really doesn’t want to, on the other she honestly probably should and it’s a plus that she gets to talk to Luz. And with every wall of hers down she finds she’s speaking faster than she can process. “Yeah— Can you come over?” 

Oh. 

“Like, now?” Luz says.

“Yeah, that is if you’re, um free yourself, butifthisisntagoodtimeyoucancomeovertomorrow.”

Very smooth.

“For you? Always. Besides, you’re my favorite stranger that I meet in the middle of the night— WAIT, shit, ok that came out so wrong.” She hears Luz facepalming “God—” Amity giggles hearing her trip through that last sentence. “Let me start over— Yes, I can come over tonight.”

“I’d pick you up but I don’t know where my siblings hid the keys and to be honest I probably shouldn’t be driving right now.” Amity runs a hand through her hair while awaiting a response.

“Oh that’s ok! I like walking, I’ll be there in 20? 15 if I walk really fast!” Amity swears she can hear the smile in Luz's voice. “How much did you drink tonight?”

Amity thinks for a second before responding, “Honestly, no clue but by the looks on my sibling’s terrified faces probably way too much.” 

“I’m glad you’re okay and safe back home. I’ll be there soon. No falling asleep before I get there, you hear me?” 

“Aye aye boss whatever you say.” She makes a saluting motion but quickly realizes nobody can see her.

Their call ends and Amity is left with the realization that she asked Luz to come over and Luz, without fail, said yes?

She doesn’t know what she did to deserve someone like Luz in her life and she swears to herself that she’ll do anything to preserve that no matter the cost.