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Getting away with it (All messed up)

Summary:

Marc Spector is a survivor. Let's just take some time to analyze that.
This is how it starts:
"That was the day he died.
Aching and bleeding, crawling for shade in the middle of the desert. He’d survived drowning, he was not going to let himself die out of thirst. As he pointed the barrel to his throat, he felt that was the right way to go. He’d already outlived any expectation."

Notes:

Ok, I just wanted to say that this fic has been inspired by the song "Getting away with it (All messed up)" by James, part of whose lyrics you can read in italics. I might suggest that you listen to it as you read, because I love the sort of feeling it creates. I don't know what is it, but there's hope in there. We kind of need hope to get by, I guess.

M.

Work Text:

Are you aching for the blade?

That’s OK

We’re insured

 

That was the day he died.

Aching and bleeding, crawling for shade in the middle of the desert. He’d survived drowning, he was not going to let himself die out of thirst. As he pointed the barrel to his throat, he felt that was the right way to go. He’d already outlived any expectation.

And still, the minute the new voice added to the choir in his head, he felt the spark of hope ignite again deep inside his chest. A giant talking dead bird wasn’t even the weirdest thing he’d seen so far, anyway.

So, yeah, the travellers of the night could count on him alright.

When you’re drowning and life throws a lifeline at you, you take it.

 

Daniel’s saving grace

She’s out in deep water

Hope is a good swimmer

 

That was the day he died.

Two shots rang and he felt the cold embrace of water closing down on him. Paralysing pain reverberating through him, no magical mummy gauze to save him, this time.

That was the day he died.

Steven rolled up on the sand, the ship stirring further and further away from him, his steps getting slower and slower. Paralysing cold reverberating through him. His vision blurred, sounds muffled. He heard Marc screaming in the distance, but he couldn’t reach out to him this time.

That was the day he died.

Jake could feel the choking feeling of water down his throat. Paralysing pain reverberating through him. Nowhere to run, no one to fight. No way to shake off that paralysing terror. He couldn’t save them this time.

That was the day he died.

Marc stood and stared. The field of Reeds stretched out in miles and miles of pure gold shimmering in the setting sun. No pain, no cold, no hurt. Not for him. A full heart in his hands, a golden paradise to shelter him forever. He just had to let go.

 

Daniel plays his ace

Deep inside his temple

He knows how to serve her

 

When the sound of her steps on the stairs could get to him, Marc would make sure the door was bolted and curled up in the corner, listening carefully. Sometimes the steps would stop at the floor below, sometimes they would carry on to the room next to his. Sometimes he could hear her cry.

When somebody knocked at his door, Steven would always open with a smile on his face. Dad would ruffle his hair and invite him downstair for a snack. Mom would come in and sit with him quietly, watching him play and draw. She would smile at him softly and remind him that she loved him.

When Mom would reach out for the belt, Jake would show no fear. He could take it, no matter how hard she tried to break him. He would take his shirt off and offer her his back. He wouldn’t cry, nor scream. He wouldn’t try to run or hide. He would stand his ground and do his best to make sure he was still standing at the end of it.

 

Daniel’s saving grace

He was all but drowning

Now they live like dolphins

 

Marc’s eyes drifted lazily around the room. In the hazy morning light, the lights of the aquarium shone a little brighter. Two goldfish swimming quietly, no more battles to fight.

I’m glad we found Gus Jr. said a voice in his head. They look happy, together.

<< Let’s just hope they stay two. >>

I’m not letting you kill one of them again.

That was not what Marc had meant, but he wouldn’t stay there lying in bed to explain. They had places to go, guide qualification courses to attend and Layla to meet for a coffee in the early afternoon.

Marc had no idea of where they were going from there, but he was pretty sure they could make it.

 

Getting away with it

All messed up

That’s the living