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There were many things in this world that Minho didn’t understand. He didn’t understand why Rose couldn’t just move over for Jack, he didn’t get why he wasn’t allowed kittens in the dormitories, and he was at a lack of understanding as to why Seungmin refused to throw cardboard in the general waste. Most of all, he didn’t understand why he couldn’t do anything right.
Nothing at all.
It wasn’t his fault that he missed a single piece of fluff when cleaning up, nothing that he did was good enough. Minho had gone around his parents for the afternoon after being guilt-tripped into visiting, apparently, he doesn’t visit enough. Shocking.
After staying for two hours, Minho accepted that whatever he did wasn’t good enough. Vacuuming? Nope. Washing up? Nope. Existing? Nope.
Why his mother guilt-tripped him into visiting and then made him do household chores in a home that wasn’t even his, he’ll never understand. Either way, life was unfair.
As soon as he had left Satan’s home, he’d gotten into his car and drove straight to the nearest convenience store. Upon arriving outside of the shady-looking 24-hour store, Minho threw his head back with a shaky sigh.
He didn’t understand. Why wasn’t he ever good enough?
“Why-Why…” He mumbles out, taking a deep breath in and a deep breath out. That’s what people say to do when you’re stressed and upset, right? Breathing only worked for so long before his stupid head pressed rewind on his memories. The words echoed in his mind and all he had done was stand there and take it.
Useless.
Pathetic.
Worthless.
With so many things going through his head, there was only one thing he wanted. He wants Seungmin. He wants his warm hugs, and comforting words, he wants it all right now. However, what he couldn’t have right now was the one thing he wanted most.
Seungmin was all the way back at campus, likely in class or working one of his jobs right now. Minho had lost track of his boyfriend’s schedule at this point, there were just so many things on his to-do list.
Though Seungmin would throw everything away to spend time with Minho, he knows that. It also makes him feel worse, Seungmin loved him so much, he was even willing to skip work for him and that was saying something.
He’d just wait in Seungmin’s dorm, that’s what he’ll do. That way, Seungmin wouldn’t skip anything for his sake, he wouldn’t put his life on hold for something as silly as a family disagreement.
Minho felt ridiculous. As a fully grown adult, he should be able to deal with these things himself without having to cry on his boyfriend’s shoulder like a child. No, he refuses to cry. He was going to grow the fuck up, who cries over something as trivial as a piece of fluff left on the floor?
(>.<)
Standing outside Seungmin’s door, he takes a deep breath, willing the lump in his throat to go away. The whole drive back consisted of sad blues on the radio and Minho sadly singing along as if it were his sole purpose in life. In hindsight, he was pretty on edge today.
Okay, no tears! Only smiles. He didn’t want Seungmin to worry about him. Actually…He didn’t want Seungmin to see him so weak. Minho had never cried in front of Seungmin, not while completely out of his headspace anyway.
He’d seen him cry a handful of times while regressed, it was actually quite embarrassing to think about it. Why was he so goddamn weak?
Shaking the thoughts out of his head, he knocks on the door. Part of him doesn’t want Seungmin to answer so he didn’t have to know what terrible wreck Minho had landed himself in this time, the other part of him really wants him.
God, he wants to be with him so bad it hurts.
Once convinced that he won’t break down as soon as he sees Seungmin’s face, he knocks on Seungmin’s dorm, waiting an antagonising 30 seconds before he hears movement.
Seungmin was actually in?
The door swings open revealing Seungmin dressed in his signature comfy clothes, glasses perched on the edge of his nose signifying that he had been reading. Great. He’d gone ahead and interrupted Seungmin’s alone time.
“Hyung,” If Minho weren’t drowning in his feelings, he would have noticed how much Seungmin brightened up upon seeing him outside his dorm. However, struggling to breathe both literally and metaphorically, Minho failed to notice Seungmin’s joy.
Keeping his strong persona going, he walks into the room, keeping a wobbly smile on his face. With his eyes cast down at the ground, it was difficult for Seungmin to see all the battles going on behind his facade, at least he hoped so.
“Did you want something to drink?”
Minho swallows, taking one look at his fluffy, golden retriever boyfriend before breaking down on the spot. The tears he’d been fighting off for the past hour finally freely flowed down his cheeks, dripping miserably onto the ground.
“Minho-” Seungmin gasps, rushing forwards to take his boyfriend into his arms, “Hey, what’s wrong baby?” He worries, pulling him down to sit on the bed with him.
Seungmin had never seen him cry quite like it, it was different from when he was little, the cries were…Emotional. Not that they weren’t when he was regressed but this was different, it held a certain level of agony to it.
It was heartbreaking.
Unlike when he was little, he was a silent crier, only making so much of a sound when he inhaled for air against Seungmin’s shoulder where his head rested. There was so much raw emotion that Seungmin himself was struggling not to cry with him.
“It’s- It’s not fair,” Minho weakly cries, clutching at Seungmin’s hoodie, “I can’t-” He stops himself from saying anything further, his endless supply of tears making talking very hard right now.
“Shh, it’s okay Min, you’re okay,” Seungmin whispers, holding him closer than before. It was at that moment that Seungmin realised just how much he loves Minho, just how much he would do for him. Whoever made him feel this way better watch out for the angry wrath of Kim Seungmin storming through the buildings.
He keeps a crying Minho in his arms for another ten minutes, cuddled up against him on his bed as he shakes in his arms. After a few more minutes, his shaking shoulders calm down but his head remains hidden in the crook of his neck, refusing to look up and face reality. Either that or he’d regressed…
Seungmin couldn’t help the small, pained smile that tugged on his lips as he noticed Minho’s thumb disappearing and up towards his mouth. Whatever had upset him this much really must be weighing down on him, so much that he slipped…
Seungmin was about to commit murder. Who dares mess with his boyfriend and get away with it? Not in this household. No, no, no.
Without jostling Minho too much, he reaches into his nightstand and grabs what he believes to be the little’s paci. One quick look at his hand confirms just as much. He gently moves Minho’s face until he’s able to remove his thumb and slot the pacifier into his mouth; as soon as he does so, Minho quickly hides away again.
It was rather cute seeing Minho hiding away, sad but cute.
Deciding it would be better to let Minho calm himself down first, Seungmin stays quiet and lies back, keeping his fingers threading through the little’s hair. After being his caregiver for around 6 months, it was fair to say Seungmin had learnt a few things.
First of all, he knew that Minho hated anything to do with insects. Although it had been surprising to see Minho standing at his door at 3 AM, a pillow clasped in his arms as he pouted in the doorway, mumbling something about a grasshopper, it was adorable.
Secondly, he knew that Minho loved affection, so much so that he recharged on it. He had an obsession with hugs and snuggling before sleeping and during the day too. Hugging Minho was a gift in itself, he was a snuggly little kitten sometimes.
Seungmin had also learnt that, like now, Minho didn’t like to be pushed. Waiting for him to come out of his shell and open up himself was the fastest route to getting something out of him.
He would have to be patient.
“Would you like a bottle, angel?” He mumbles, making a move to get up with Minho still wrapped around his frame. Minho nods without saying a word, clutching onto Seungmin for dear life.
When Seungmin had finished making the bottle, he sat up against the headboard with Minho waiting on his lap. “Good?” He smiles when Minho takes the bottle from him and starts drinking it straight away, leaning his head against Seungmin’s chest.
Minho nods, removing one of his hands to hold his caregiver’s. Although Minho wasn’t talking yet, it didn’t bother Seungmin in the slightest. He’d come to learn and accept everything that made Minho Minho.
A short while later, they lay in the same position, bottle abandoned to the side. Seungmin was starting to doze off with Minho sitting on his stomach, playing with the curly parts of his hair.
“Minnie,” He whispers, poking at Seungmin’s cheek, “Wakey,”
He blinks, properly opening up his eyes, “Minnie’s awake lovely,” Seungmin reassures him, squeezing his hand for emphasis. “How are you feeling, angel?”
“S’eepy,” He slurs around the paci in his mouth, “Minnie hold Min ‘gain?”
How could Seungmin decline that offer?
“Come here kitten,”
Although he doesn’t know what’s bothering Minho yet, he will wait. Seungmin knows that when Minho comes out of headspace, he’ll tell him. Until then, he would gratefully hold his baby and spoil him with all the love in the world.
“Night-night, Minnie loves you loads,”