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Spinning. Yes spinning. Everything was spinning and even though Jayme felt the solid wall behind her she was still convinced it would crumble down around her. It was just a trip to the gas station. Just her and Alphonso. She loves Alphonso. It should’ve been easy. She’s a super hero, she can make people hallucinate by spitting on them for crying out loud. But she was scared of the maybe 5 total people in that store.
It wasn’t even a long trip, Alphonso fought Diego and all she had to do was pay for the snacks and wait in the car for him. But the shaking started before the even got there, before they got in the car, it started when he asked her to come with him. She wouldn’t say no to him but god staying in her cold, dark room sounded great.
He even said she didn’t have to go, he would get her snacks anyways but she thought she should be able to do this. She shouldn’t spend all of her free time cowering in her room.
“Just pay for the snacks and leave just pay for the snacks and leave.” She rehearsed heading into the station. She beelined towards the candy.
“Hey get me my munchies!” Alphonso called out, as if it wasn’t the whole reason they were there. She grabbed her candy and Alphonso’s chips. She almost didn’t notice Alphonso and Diego fighting, too caught up in her own spiral. Just a quick glance to them, Alphonso can hold his own just fine against him.
Up to the register, snacks on the counter. The cashier says something to her but she can’t hear him. Her hands are braced against the counter and a ringing fills her ears.
“Ma’am.. Ma’am. It’s 12.99. Cash or Card.” He was louder than she would’ve liked but she wordlessly took out 15 dollars. Words felt too hard to form and she just wanted to get out of here. She left without her change, sitting back in the car and melting back onto the steering wheel.
“Just gotta breath.. just gotta breath Jayme. You’re okay, it’s over now, your okay.” Her own quiet whispers didn’t do much to calm her nerves, but she survived long enough for Alphonso to come back. Long enough to wordlessly hand him his snacks and start reversing the car. She can tell it’s itching him not to ask why she can’t talk, but he doesn’t anyways, she’s a little more relieved. Jayme doesn’t like explaining herself to people. Especially not something so weak and pathetic. That’s what Reginald would call it if he wasn’t borderline senile. But his words still stick, and she still stays quiet.
Her body feels automatic one they’re back to the academy. Turn the ignition off, unbuckle, get out, close the door, open the back door to the academy, shuffle to the bathroom, let it all come crashing down.
The bathroom door lock clicks and that’s when Jayme let’s go. She turns to stand up against the wall and she can’t breath. Everything spins around her and her lungs feel like they’re going to jump out of her body and walk away from her. Eyeliner and mascara come down her cheeks in little streaks.
“I’m pathetic, I can’t.. I can’t even go out.. I can’t.. What’s wrong with me?” She’s practically wheezing the words out to herself now. She coughs, hoping the words actually got stuck in her throat and she’ll be able to breath again once they’re out.
Sloane couldn’t help but hear the bathroom door close with a click, the gasping and coughing. She knows that key ring she snagged from Reginald’s office will come in handy now. She gets down from her place perched on the ceiling and heads toward the bathroom. Knocking on the door, when she doesn’t hear a response she knocks a bit louder.
“Jayme? Are you okay?” No answer, but the labored breathing is enough for Sloane to search through the keys, and crack into the bathroom.
She’s good at her job, good at quick assessments and putting plans into action. She’s already assessed that Jayme is having a panic attack, and is planning to comfort her. Once she can get her feet to move from their stuck-in-stone like spots.
She can move again when Jayme looks up at her. Eyes wet with tears, make up running and nose red. She’s slightly tucked into herself, folded up against the wall and hiding the rest of her face in her arms. She’s looks up at Sloane desperate, like a small child who has just woken up from a terrible nightmare.
“Please.. Sloane. I can’t.. I can’t.” And Sloane knows exactly what she’s saying, knows exactly what she needs. She gently whisks the door shut behind her and sinks down onto the floor next to Jayme.
She opens her arms and Jayme sinks down into them, sobs taking over, shaking body enclosed in the firm hold of Sloane.
“Shh, It’s okay. I’m here. You’re going to be okay. You just have to try to breath, little cobra.” She gently soothes Jayme. One arm firmly around her torso and the other threading through her dark hair. Rocking a bit back and forth, shushing and cooing in her sisters ear, they start to make progress.
It’s slow, very slow. But Sloane stays and that’s all Jayme really wants. When Jayme sits up, Sloane doesn’t move to leave. She’s steady, but tears are still silently running down her face, and she’s still trying to hide her eyes behind her hands. They’re almost there.
“Hey.. hey. It’s okay Jayme. You don’t have to be ashamed of crying. You were scared. It doesn’t matter if you think it’s for a good reason or not, you were. It’s okay to be scared of things we shouldn’t be. I promise you it’s going to be okay, I really do promise you that. Here, hold my hand.” Sloane is reaching out and Jayme cautiously takes her hand.
She stands up and guides Jayme into a hug, lightly stepping back and forth slowly.
“Let’s go to my room, you don’t have to talk if you can’t. I just want you to be more comfortable. You’re going to be okay.”
The sisters slowly walk the short distance to Sloane’s room. Sloane walks in and Jayme allows herself to be dragged to the bed. She feels a bit out of place here but the cuddle Sloane is putting her in makes her feel more than welcomed, maybe she even feels wanted. She lays there as Sloane wipes off her smeared make up and takes her jacket off. Jayme doesn’t like the feeling of not having her comfort hood on but Sloane is pulling the blankets up and holding Jayme just how she wants. The world can’t hurt her when her sister is protecting her. Jayme happily falls asleep there, and Sloane happily lays there, holding her sister until she feels all better, and then some.