Work Text:
There was only one bed.
“You bribed the innkeeper, didn’t you?” Cui Buqu accused.
Feng Xiao fluffed his tail feathers as he began to take out his (many) hair ornaments, placing them on the elaborately carved wooden dresser. “Well since you noticed, why didn’t you stop me? Ququ, isn’t this what they call ‘not speaking your mind’? Even if you keep your desire a secret, who wouldn’t want to sleep with a peerless, jade beauty like me?”
“You’re speaking bullshit. Isn’t it natural to assume someone fussy like you was simply paying the innkeeper to change the sheets and pillows to new ones?” Cui Buqu felt like every bone in his body had been wrung dry; Qiao Xian was going to force him to drink even more of that bitter medicine once she found out he had overexerted himself once again. Lying on the bed, he spoke, “You’re sleeping on the floor.”
Flicking his wrist to extinguish all the lamps in the room, Feng Xiao acted as if he had said the exact opposite and naturally laid next to him. “Ququ! Don’t be cruel. Do you know how many people must’ve stepped on this floor? My skin would revolt!”
Cui Buqu rolled onto his side, turning his back against him. “You’ve brought this upon yourself.”
Feng Xiao took this as an invitation to spoon him. “‘A house divided against itself cannot stand’. Commander Cui, how can you act like this when we still have Liu Yan’s murder to solve? You’d think we didn’t just fight through an endless array and then climb out of a ravine together. Aren’t we close?”
“I am asleep.” Cui Buqu said in a flat voice.
Miraculously, other than tightening his arms around him, Feng Xiao offered no other riposte. Maybe he had finally decided to allow Cui Buqu some rest after a hectic day.
In truth, he had been momentarily distracted with watching Cui Buqu breathe. The five senses of those who practised martial arts were devoutly honed and became more enhanced than regular people’s. Owing to that, one of Feng Xiao’s favourite pastimes was simply listening to the rhythm of Cui Buqu’s heart or the pattern of his breath.
Cui Buqu breathed through his mouth, a habit that caused his breath in the morning to smell foul. Feng Xiao would’ve suspected he did this on purpose to avoid kissing him if it wasn’t for the knowledge that Cui Buqu struggled with breathing. He always produced a soft whistling sound as he drew in and out air, which worsened if the air was pollen or dust filled, or if the environment was mouldy. Sometimes he would have coughing fits, turning his lips and the tips of his fingers blue.
Feng Xiao thought it was truly a wonder for Cui Buqu to have survived this long when it seemed even breathing itself took so much effort for him.
Soon, the moon rose to its peak in the sky, placing it at the perfect angle to shine through the inn window and cast panels of light onto Cui Buqu’s face. The cold light only seemed to highlight his pale complexion, accentuating his eyebags and other depressions on his skin.
“Ququ,” Feng Xiao whispered, warm breath falling over Cui Buqu’s face. “Are you asleep?”
“Yes.” Came the answer. Cui Buqu felt too tired to even be annoyed at such a pointless question. He knew that Feng Xiao could very well tell whether he was asleep or not.
“I didn’t know I could love someone else this much until I met you.”
“They say women always want to talk about their feelings after sex. You must forgive me, Commander Feng, for I have no memory of engaging in intercourse with you.”
Feng Xiao chuckled. “I love that about you. You challenge me in ways I never thought were possible. Even when you scheme against me or dig pits for me, my heart can’t help but fill with even more affection and admiration.”
Cui Buqu stayed silent for a moment. “...are you a masochist?”
He felt lips curl into a grin against the side of his neck. “Aha, Ququ, you can’t keep doing this to me. Everything you say, everytime I see you, you make me happier than words could express. I didn’t understand it at first, how could a sickly, ailing man make a peerless beauty like me feel this way?-”
“Because you have horrifically bad taste.”
“-But then I slowly realised how incredible you were. You’re cold and bad tempered, vengeful, determined, resilient-”
“Half of those things were negative.”
“-so no matter how you taunt me, scold me, scheme behind my back against me, I’ll keep falling for you, more and more.”
Cui Buqu: “…How can you say that when you know I’m cold, bad tempered, vengeful, and will likely die in a couple years? Are you insane?”
“Those aren’t bad qualities to me. How could I claim to love you if I didn’t love those parts of you just as well as when you’re softhearted? Any other qualities wouldn’t be the Ququ I know. It’s because you’re Cui Buqu, those traits are cute and endearing to me.” He smiled as he snuggled closer against the other’s back. “Besides, it's because you will likely die in a couple years that I have to look after you so that you can keep taunting me for years to come.”
Cui Buqu stayed silent for a while after that. Feng Xiao didn’t mind simply enjoying his presence and listening to his heartbeat, which had considerably quickened.
“...Feng-er?”
“Mhm, I don’t mind you calling me so sweetly, but I’m always listening to you, Ququ.”
“Do you remember what I said at Madam Yu’s grave?”
Feng Xiao turned his head upwards to think for a moment. “I don’t remember the exact words, but you said something similar to: ‘Let’s not be mother and son again in the next life’.”
“.
.
.
…Let us meet again in the next life, and every one after that. I want to have lots of days to sit in the sun, making schemes with you.” Cui Buqu muttered with his eyes closed.
To Feng Xiao, those two simple sentences were better than any other pages long sonnet that any distinguished scholar in the world could have compiled, simply because it came from Cui Buqu. “Ququ! Ququ! You really can’t keep saying these things, my little maiden’s heart is going to burst!” He laughed, heart pounding. “I love you. I love you more than I could’ve imagined. I love you more than myself!”
“It's no wonder you’re bad at poetry.”
“I love you~”
“I won’t say it back.” Cui Buqu said, sounding almost guilty.
Feng Xiao smiled. “You never need to say anything. Something like this, it's unconditional, isn’t it?”
He dreamed of characters being traced onto his skin.
◦ ~ <<☼>> ~ ◦
By morning, Cui Buqu was already gone from the bed when Feng Xiao woke. He could practically already hear the words: Did Feng-guniang need her beauty sleep? Despite the inevitable taunting, Feng Xiao found it cute that Cui Buqu let him sleep in even when they were in the middle of investigating a rather time pressured murder.
Using his martial arts, Feng Xiao slipped silently out of the covers and behind Cui Buqu who was sitting on the floor and eating a bowl of congee. Wrapping his hands around him, he gently traced the characters “爱你” onto the others cheek.
Cui Buqu froze. “You dreamt that.” He said.
Feng Xiao laughed. “So you admit it, Ququ!”
Cui Buqu was an intelligent person. By saying the words ‘You dreamt that’, he would obviously reveal that he knew those very characters were traced on Feng Xiao during his sleep. Logically, there was only one person who could have done that. Thinking about it this way, the flimsy denial was practically a confession.
Cui Buqu rolled his eyes as Feng Xiao preened, combing his regrettably shorter hair as he admired himself in the mirror.
“By the way Ququ, did you get any congee for me?”
Cui Buqu gave a cold smile. “Since you were so insistent on sharing a bed yesterday, you definitely wouldn’t mind sharing a bowl of congee.” He held out the half eaten bowl to Feng Xiao.
“...Did you brush your teeth.” He asked, despite already knowing the answer.
“Nope.” Cui Buqu replied joyfully.
Feng Xiao vaguely recalled Cui Buqu using his teeth to tear apart muddy robes taken from dead bodies to tie a rope in order to climb out of the ravine yesterday, and paled.