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Ema stared in to the mirror, wondering if this was really her. “All finished,” Louis said, taking a step back to give her space to move around a bit. She turned to the side, then quickly shifted her weight on to her other foot, almost like a hop. Her hair swung behind her, a small curl brushing by her ear.
She reached up and pushed her hair up, as if to test it, almost laughing to herself. “Thank you so much,” she said, smiling in to the mirror. The flower in her hair almost perfectly matched the ones on the top of her yukata. It was sweet of Louis to think of that.
“You look beautiful,” he said, running his hand along the curves of the curls. “It sucks that you can’t come,” Ema said, turning away from the mirror to look at him.
“Perhaps I’ll be able to attend later, but hair stylings for the festival are quite common. I’m usually booked around this time anyway,” he explained, grabbing her hand. “Don’t be upset. The lively style doesn’t suit a frown,” he smiled. She nodded once, as if to solidify his advice. It wasn’t all that bad. She still had most of the family with her. It just… kinda hurt that Louis had to drive back to be with other people.
She already had people bail on her. Originally, she was going with Imai and Sasakura, but Imai fell ill, and Sasakura… well, he said something came up. Of course, Yuusuke would still be coming, but that was only half the original group. She would be lying if she said it wasn’t a little disheartening.
“Have a fun time at the festival,” Louis smiled, placing a quick kiss on her forehead. He waved once, and shut the door behind him, leaving her alone in the large room. She slowly sank down on to her bed, wondering how she would pass the time. She didn’t have her consoles with her, and she couldn’t exactly go very far in a yukata, much less without someone to drive her. She had left Juli at home too, since the house had a no-pets rule for easier maid cleaning. Her only entertainment was the other brothers, and her cell phone… which had no battery.
“I guess being tired of your siblings is part of being a family,” she sighed, slouching her back. Obviously her new family was… eclectic. But she just wasn’t sure how to deal with their other… quirks. To call them affectionate would be an understatement. She wouldn’t ever say anything bad about them to someone, but she had to be honest at least with herself—she was sick of being doted on by every single one of them. She had been pulled in 13 different directions, and she felt sometimes like she was about to snap.
“Tonight will be different,” she reassured herself, straightening her back and rising to her feet. She glanced once more at the mirror before opening the door, making sure she looked happy and confident.
Before she could even place both feet outside the door, Wataru came barreling at her. “Guess what, guess what! I get to come with you and Yuusuke!” he beamed. Ema smiled in response, but once again, she felt her heart sink a bit more. This wasn’t exactly what she had planned. This wasn’t at all what she had planned. With every step she took, her plans were falling apart more and more. Already she wasn’t hanging out with her best friends, but now Louis had to leave, and now Wataru would be tagging along behind her and Yuusuke, and-
“You okay? Is Wataru holding on too tight or something?”
She looked up from the wooden floors to face Yuusuke. “I’m okay. Thanks for asking,” she smiled, brushing a hand over Wataru’s head. She watched Yuusuke, who seemed to be spacing out as much as she was. “Are we leaving already?” he yelled. She felt her shoulders tense for a moment, and Wataru loosened to look at Yuusuke. She laughed for a moment, but shook her head. “We don’t have to leave just yet. Louis just wanted to do my hair,” Ema explained. “You can’t leave yet! I’m not ready!” Wataru said, letting go of Ema to scamper off to his own room.
“I guess I should go get ready,” Yuusuke said, a hint of urgency in his voice.
Ema stepped out of the way so Yuusuke could head to his room down the hall. She looked at him once, then smiled.
Time passed quicker than she expected. She had somehow spent over an hour staring off the balcony, just looking through the trees. She was ashamed to note that she wasn’t even thinking about anything. She was ashamed to admit that she didn’t want to. The more she tried to think, the more she ended up worrying, and the more her eyes threatened to cry.
“Ema, are you ready to leave?” Kaname asked, poking his head out the sliding glass door. “Yeah, um, yes,” she said, turning away from the foliage.
He looked at her for a moment, a mixture of concern and content on his face. “Well, we’ll be waiting outside when you’re ready. Wataru still hasn’t figured out how to fix his yukata, so it may be a moment,” he said. He waited for her to nod in affirmation before closing the door behind him.
She took a breath in, and held it for a few seconds. She tried her best to listen to the world around her, hoping to ground herself and let her worries absolve. She heard the summer cicadas, and the rustling of wind in the trees.
And she heard voices.
Now, she was certain she wasn’t going crazy—at least not yet—and they sounded very real. When she focused on them, she could make out a few words. Her name. Worried. Festival.
She leaned out further, pushing herself a bit over the railing to see if she could hear what they were saying anymore clearly. She knew she wasn’t exactly supposed to be listening, but they were talking about her.
“She seems really tired, doesn’t she?” That was Masaomi.
So it showed. “It’s your fault, you know. You’re the ones trying to force her way in to her life,” Hikaru said. Nobody replied. “But in a way, it’s also hers.”
“Hikaru, you know that’s not true,” Kaname quickly jumped to defend her.
And yet… It was. She had practically led them on for months now… From when she first met them all two years ago, she never expected to let this go on for so long. She was only in her first year of highschool. To think that she’ll be graduating in a few months really put things in to perspective.
“She disrupted the balance. Can you at least recognize that?” Hikaru asked. She felt her chest tighten, and she quickly hurried inside, nearly slamming the glass door behind her. She didn’t want to know the answer.
“A bit on edge, eh?” Ema whirled around, pressing her hands against the cold glass. “Fuuto… It’s only you,” she breathed.
“Idiot sister,” he said, though the arrogant smile he normally wore was replaced with a softer one.
Ema half laughed, taking a deep breath in to calm her nerves. “Are you not coming with us to the festival?” she asked, motioning at his casual garb. He shook his head. “I have better things to do than hang out with your crowd,” he remarked, a hint of hubris leaking in.
She half smiled for a moment, but she let the ends of her mouth fall. He reminded her about her dissolved plans. “Actually… They aren’t able to come,” she confessed. “Really? They stood you up? Sad,” he remarked, unknowingly cold.
She shrugged. “They have lives too. Well, I really should get going. I’ll see you soon,” she said, turning for the door.
She placed her hand on the knob before looking back once at Fuuto. She wasn’t sure if she had missed something. Something in her wanted to stay. Something in her wanted just to cry, even if Fuuto was the last person she expected to turn to for comfort.
“See ya,” he said, waving once.
She nodded, then turned the handle, revealing herself to the group of brothers waiting for her. “Ema, nice to see you,” Masaomi said, smiling at her. “Is Wataru ready?” she asked, looking to him for an answer.
“Tsubaki hasn’t returned, so I’ll say no,” Azusa replied instead. Ema nodded. “Is Natsume still coming?” she asked, looking for Azusa for the answer.
“He should,” replied Masaomi instead. She laughed a bit inside, wondering why the two were answering questions meant for the other. But she was happy Natsume would be able to come. She was worried about it, with work and all. Knowing that he would be coming set her at ease, in a way. At least some things could go right.
That thought left a bad taste in her mouth. She seemed so bratty… Even if she knew it came from a place of well meaning, she still hated that she seemed like a child. She sighed, and tried to set herself at ease.
"Hey! My cute little sister!" Tsubaki said, Wataru in tow. "Your yukata is so pretty!" Wataru said, despite seeing it earlier. She smiled in response.
"Shall we go?" Hikaru asked. "Wait, Yuusuke!" Ema blurted, embarrassed that she didn't realize he was missing earlier.
"Ah, so you could tell. I suppose you can wait here. I'll be heading over now. Ciao," Hikaru said, waving once at the whole group of them. Ema raised her hand to wave, but she hesitated for a moment. She felt bad for hesitating, but, oh, she felt even worse about the point Hikaru had brought up.
She did disrupt the balance. At least the youngest of them, Wataru, had lived 10 years without a sister. And for the oldest... 31. She screwed everything up with her and her damn squirrel. While she could acknowledge this, she wasn't sure if that made it right. She didn't want to ask for comfort, she wanted to ask what Hikaru meant when he said that. If there was anything she could do to fix this... Other than making a choice. Something in her was vehemently against it.
"Ema?" Yuusuke asked. She could recognize the voice anywhere. "You were kind of spacing out... We should probably go to catch up with the rest of the group," he said, scratching the back of his neck with his left hand. In his right... he was holding hers.
She was tempted to question it, but it felt… right, in a way. “You’re right. Let’s go,” she said, pulling him along.
As they neared into the festival grounds, they began to lose track of time. Fun conversation, laughter, and unfaltering smiles. “Oh, look at the sunset,” Ema sighed, pointing forward. Staring at the blossom of reds and pinks, she smiled. She took a deep breath in, closing her eyes. They were the perfect distance away, equidistant from the festival grounds and their vacation home. No sounds of giggling children, or the thunder of drums.
All they could hear now was the bits of nature. The lapping of the ocean waves in the distance, just a small trip away from the path. The call of the evening cicadas, hiding on the branches of trees. The sound of their quiet breath as they both realized they had stopped in their tracks.
Ema glanced over at Yuusuke, smiling. Yuusuke seemed to be looking at her with such admiration. His eyes seemed to sparkle. She glanced down at her feet, squeezing his hand once. He almost gasped, a little surprised, as if he hadn't known they were holding hands. She stifled a small laugh, trying to hold back.
Her eyes drifted from his, to his lips. She felt her heart beat faster, and her face heated up. She felt something come over her… confidence.
She guided his hand to her cheek, smiling as they drew closer. Their lips were so close. All that was left was to bridge the gap. She could do this. Her confidence was quickly slipping through her fingers, and she felt anxious trying to keep it together.
Closing her eyes, she was close enough to feel the brush of his soft lips, and- “What nerve to leave me behind, those idiot brothers.”
Ema flinched. She couldn’t. Neither of them had that kind of confidence, and neither of them wanted to face the rage of Fuuto, even if that meant nothing inherently bad for Ema. “Let’s keep going,” she said, turning back in the direction of the festival. Her hands were noticeably empty now. But she had to press on.
Arriving at the grounds, she was happy to meet up with the rest of the group. It made her feel safe with her own actions. She knew she wouldn’t do anything so rash.
“So, Ema, what would you like to do first?” Masaomi asked, holding Wataru’s hand. “Oh, I’ll just follow you. Where’s Natsume?” she asked, probably a bit too quickly. “He’s on his way,” Masaomi reassured her.
“Can we go play a game?” Wataru asked, pulling on Ema’s hand. “Oh, um, sure,” she said, following him over to the goldfish game. She looked back at the small group, but decided that this was fine too. Wataru would be happy, maybe she would win a goldfish, and then she could meet back with the rest of the group later.
She could still play senbonbiki with Yuusuke, and watch the fireworks with the triplets. She could still eat all the festival foods with Kaname and Hikaru. Everything would be just fine.
When she looked back at Wataru, he already had a poi in hand. And Tsubaki was right next to him, guiding him on how to catch one of the fish. “And… there! A king goldfish,” Tsubaki cheered. Ema smiled, staring at the fish swimming happily around.
“Wataru, we don’t have a fish tank at home. Maybe you should give it to someone who does,” Azusa said, leaning down next to him. Ema took a step back to allow him more room. “But…” Wataru paused, holding the top of the bag tightly. “You’re right, I guess,” Wataru said.
Ema smiled, and stood back up completely to watch Wataru wander around in search of someone who would take better care of this fish. She wanted on one hand to follow them… On the other, it was nice to have some alone time to enjoy the festival. She was wondering if she’d find Fuuto around somewhere, since she heard him on the path.
Her stomach grumbled, interrupting her train of thought. “I suppose getting a snack first would be best,” she said to herself. Digging in to her small bag for some cash, she looked around at the many stalls, wondering what she should buy first.
The smell of sweet and savory was blending around in the air, and she wandered aimlessly down the walkway, hoping either to find someone she recognized, or for a stall owner to call out to her. She would eat anything… and in this case, that was exactly the problem.
Originally, she thought that Ukyou would be coming. She planned to have him eat all the festival foods with her, but then came a major case, so he had to stay in Tokyo. Perhaps she should recruit another brother to enjoy the food.
She decided then to simply have karaage. The chicken would fair well with her empty stomach, and she wouldn’t feel like she was cheating by skipping to dessert.
Exchanging her pocket change for the cup, she stared at the crispy orange chicken for a moment before deciding she wanted a quiet place to sit. She looked down the aisle of stalls, but decided she could head out towards the entrance to find a quieter place.
Crumpling her cup and tossing it in to the bin, she headed for the nearby restrooms to wash her hands. She had a decent enough chat with Ukyou over text while eating, but she was ready to put her phone away, and her worries with it. She wanted to enjoy this festival, this vacation.
But she wasn’t sure if she was able to do that with her brothers just yet. She found herself avoiding them at every turn, even if it wasn’t intentional. Like the conversation with Ukyou. If she was right in the head, she would’ve been the first to send a text, but he was the one to start the conversation, and she couldn’t bear to ignore him. With every exchange, the creeping feeling of dread began to rise in her, and she wished dearly that she could ignore it.
With a sigh, she smiled to pay for the cherry flavored shaved ice, and promptly walked away again from the hustle and bustle.
Holding the shaved ice, she took a moment to lean against a tree for some rest. Her phone buzzed, and with her free hand, she tried her best to reach in to her bag to grab it. She was hoping for one person, and yet, the result was something she felt more strongly about than the other options.
“Natsume,” she said quietly, reading the contact name. Picking up the phone, she felt her shoulders lower from the tense position, and an uncontrolled smile appear on her face. She felt… happy. If that was the right word. Maybe relieved, or maybe comforted. Maybe a mix of all three.
“Ema, Wataru’s looking for you,” he said, but she wasn’t listening too intently. She was focusing on the sound of his voice. The comfort of having someone you care about speak to you so calmly.
Natsume was always so calm around her, even if her own heart was racing when they were together. She liked that he wasn’t vying for her attention or love. She liked that she could let her guard down around him.
“Actually, I think it would be best if he stayed with one of you,” she started, hoping Wataru’s feelings wouldn’t be hurt. She wanted to choose who to spend this festival with, not have it be chosen for her. She had to stand her ground if she wanted to have fun with anyone but her lonesome self.
“You don’t have to say it directly, I understand. What are you doing right now?” he asked, and the sound on the other side of the phone began to get a little more clear. “Finishing up some shaved ice. I haven’t gotten to do much. Imai and Sasakura were going to go up to this shrine, but now that it’s just me and Yuusuke in the group, we haven’t done it,” Ema said, not even realizing how long she’d been talking for.
She heard her name in the ear her phone wasn’t up against, and she quickly scanned the area around her. “Oh!” she gasped, almost shaken up. “You’re still in your…” she wasn’t sure what to call it, but it certainly wasn’t a yukata.
Closing his phone, Natsume smiled. “I came by right after work,” he explained, stopping next to her. He was taller than her, and yet, he leaned against the tree in such a way that it didn’t feel daunting at all.
“Well, are you going to head up to the shrine?” he asked, almost like a reminder of her failed plans. “I guess we could,” she suggested, almost hoping that the answer would be yes.
Thinking for a moment, Natsume slightly smiled, as if he had thought of something. “Let’s make it a family thing. You’d be surprised how many of them are scared by a ghost story,” he half laughed. “Sure!” she smiled.
After gathering the group, they all stood at the base of the stairs. Mentally, she was doing a tally, going off of age. Masaomi, Kaname, Hikaru, Tsubaki, Azusa and Natsume, Yuusuke, and Wataru. Fuuto was around here somewhere, probably upset he was called all for a stupid dare. “Pair up! We’ll be headed up soon,” Ema said, smiling.
She and Natsume were first. One by one, they took each stair with tact and determination. Perhaps they wanted to be first. Perhaps they wanted to be strong. Or... perhaps they wanted a moment alone.
Once, she glanced up at the night sky, to check the weather. The sky was still perfect. She was still admiring the stars when she took the next step, and felt herself grab for Natsume's hand.
She was squeezing his hand so tightly, it probably could've turned red. Her heart had likely skipped a few beats, shocked that she had tripped, and embarrassed that she was stupid enough to trip. And maybe just a hint of knowing that Natsume was there to catch her.
When they arrived at the shrine, she looked once over her shoulder to see who else was on the path up... She wasn't sure if anyone was. It was nice, in a way. Being completely alone with Natsume felt almost comforting.
Looking at the shrine, she bowed her head for a brief moment, before opening her eyes again. The candles looked like they had recently been extinguished, just a tiny bit of smoke drifting up from them.
She smiled once at Natsume, squeezing his hand once. "Ema, I love you," he said, leaning in close. She smiled as he pressed her lips against hers, the gentle loving touch of someone so dear. Perhaps her decision had just gotten a lot easier.
She wrapped her arms around his neck, and let their bodies melt together. She couldn't say it just yet... but she loved him too.