Chapter Text
no sheep!! ❌
Asmodeus: guys you wont believe this
Asmodeus: omd
Mammon: cmon spit it out asmo!!!
Solomon: Yeah cmon :(
Asmodeus: so yk how me and MC just hang around and do our own thing
Satan: Yeah…
Asmodeus: well
Asmodeus: MC was on their phone
Asmodeus: then they started to giggle and act all flustered
Belphegor: huh
Satan: ??
Asmodeus: then
Asmodeus: then
Leviathan: dude just say it
Asmodeus: they said
Asmodeus: “they’re so cute”
Asmodeus: they have a crush!!! im calling it right now
Mammon: HUHHHHHH
Simeon: H
Simeon: wc
Solomon: He means “how cute”
Thirteen: mc… crush… maybe not really that cute considering theres like
Thirteen: a 99% chance it’s a demon
Belphegor: you’re right…
Thirteen: aaa… taking away our precious MC
Asmodeus: oh my diavolo what if they tricked them!
Solomon: :0
Asmodeus: OH MY DIAVOLO WHAG IF THEY HURT THEM
Asmodeus: i wont stand for it! i cant watch mc’s heart get broken
Belphegor: we should find them
Asmodeus: yes!! see for ourselves i like it belph
Lucifer: Shall we take action?
Satan: What are you doing here aren’t you supposed to be with Diavolo or something right now 😕
Diavolo: We finished our meeting!! Now as for the crush! :)
“Simeon! Those demons are blowing up my phone!!!” Luke came running down the hall. He wasn’t paying attention to the groupchat, he could honestly care less about what those demons were talking about!! is what he was telling himself as if he didn’t read the occasional message from the chat. Whatever it was they were talking about, they were quite passionate as the messages kept spilling in. But it was no bother! He only had sound on for private messages, groupchats were too much.
Then the private messages to started to roll in.
In hindsight he probably shouldn’t have went to Simeon considering his… limited ability with technology, but theres only so much the poor angel could think of when being hounded by the others. Simeon had been in the living room, enjoying a cup of coffee prepared (unfortunately) by Solomon as he was the only one around who could operate the coffee machine. The two were at the living room at the same time when Asmodeus’s text came through, in then which Solomon promptly got up to leave, seemingly a man on a mission as Simeon struggled to even type a response.
“Huh?! Why would they blow up your phone?” Simeon innocently asked, tilting his head. “No! Not actually!! They’re just all messaging me at once. About MC too!!” The little angel showed his screen to the older, and indeed texts were streaming in like there was no tomorrow. Ding after ding after ding, “ARGHH!!,” was thus silenced by Luke angrily turning off his ringer. He pouted, “Why do they wanna know who MC’s close with all of sudden, as if I know!” Realization popped into Simeon’s head, “Ah! That must be because Asmodeus said they have a crush.” Suddenly, Luke’s face bloomed a vibrant red.
“Crush?! Who?!” Luke snapped up to look at Simeon. “It’s probably some demon that tricked them!! Deceit! I say its deceit!!” The man merely chuckled, patting Luke on the head, “We’re not entirely sure yet, do you want to help us find out?” he winked.
Just then Solomon walked in with Raphael, “Ah have you recruited Luke into our little scheme?” Luke nodded his head eagerly, “I can spy!! We’re close in age!” His attention perked to Raphael closely behind Solomon, “Raphael! Are you helping us too?” The man idly nodded. Despite his lack of response, Raphael had seen everything and bumped into Solomon as he was about to leave his room to find the others.
“GUYS!” Ah, Thirteen. Bursted in, but welcome to the room!! “We’re all in on this right?” she smiled darkly. Cue a unanimous hum among the Purgatory Hall residents. Though she hadn’t expressed it, Thirteen was completely set on using a trap on the kid. Raphael was definitely planning on using his spears. For sure.
“Ah… I know you’re all thinking of something rash but we don’t even know who this kid could be.” Simeon reasoned. “Luke said he can be a spy!” Thirteen stated, pointing at the boy. “Stay close with MC, see who they talk to. Yes… yes…”
Raph perked up, “Do you think Mephistopheles would have some information? He knows a lot about everyone.” “That’s honestly kind of scary…” Simeon commented. “Ooo! Good idea!” Thirteen exclaimed, “I’ll text him.” and pulled her phone down, plopping onto the couch.
“Don’t you think you’re going a bit… far?” Simeon raised his hand. Solomon smiled, crossing his arms, “Nonsense!” Thirteen nodded, “Anything for MC, besides I wanna see if this kid’s even worth it,” she finished the last of her text. “anddd… sent!” Simeon gulped. Oh dear…
“Oh this kid’s gonna have some fun.”
Dinner at the House of Lamentation was…
Oddly tense.
Just before, you were in Asmo’s room hanging out and doing whatever. You’d usually have these types of days, where you’d meet up and do a self-care routine with him, and just lay around and let Asmo’s super swaggy demon products do their magic. Face and hair masks applied, you laid as comfortably as you could on his bed, snuggly cuddling a pillow under your chin.
As per Levi’s very… long and thorough list of comic recommendations, you settled on one to start reading. It was unfinished, but! Another chapter was coming out today and you were so so so so giddy because my god was this one character hot. So gorgeous, but at the same time a complete and utter dork.
The character has been blushing so profusely at their cheeks being cupped, to think something so serious would be so soft in the hands of another. Overwhelmed by the fluff, a smile had spread across your face, giggling n kicking your feet n shit!!
“They’re so cute!”
Your little comment on the character unfortunately did not get unnoticed by the literal avatar of lust, and even more unfortunate, horribly out of context! But did your poor soul know that? No! You quickly caught yourself, you did not just get so giddy over a comic… You’re really losing it huh? And is it just you or does Asmo keep glancing over at you? Strange, he’s usually straightforward…
Anyways!
Back to dinner…
It was lowkey kinda hard to eat your food when the majority of the brothers were staring you down, save for Beel who was happily scarfing down anything and everything on the table. Lips pressed awkwardly into a thin line, you picked at your food trying to ignore the 6 pairs of eyes weighing on you. You opened your mouth to ask what’s wrong—
“So MC!”
Asmo was the first to speak up, God(?), Diavolo bless his soul(??) you didn’t have tk break up the silence
“Yeah Asmo?”
“Have you made any friends at RAD? Besides us and the exchange program? I’m curious!” Asmo leaned in with a smile. If it had been Lucifer questioning it’d be far less friendly chit-chat and more like criminal investigation…
“Yeah actually! They’re super fun, we go around a lot!!” you quipped. You just know Lucifer would have your head if he knew exactly who, and just how far “around” is. Diavolo knows what will happen if Lucifer found out you had befriended Mephistopheles’ little brother, Faust, and the boy almost got you to skip class. On a whole other level he’s made you lie so he could freely take you out to town unknowingly under the guise of a study session.
Thank Diavolo there’s no Life360 equivalent in the Devildom, or else you’d think you’d be quite literally dead right now considering Lucifer doesn’t exactly trust you that much since you’re a teen. “I know how you humans are, so rebellious, I’ve seen if, blah blah blah,” yeah ok old man. The thought if Lucifer having Life360 is genuinely. very scary. The man would be a monster.
That and Mephistopheles and Lucifer’s relationship is quite bitter, so you pulling up and being like “Hey!! I’m friends with the little brother of the guy that hates your guts!” would probably. not end well.
But!!
The brothers can know that you’ve snuck out with some random kid later.
“Hmm? May I know who exactlyyyy…?” Asmo batted his lashes. “Mmmmm… maybeee,” you teased back. You’d rather keep Faust to yourself right now, the brothers would hound him, and you’d rather not push away you’re only reprieve. Sure everybody was fun to be around with, but it was eventually exhausting as they kept asking for more than what they could give back.
Luke was a sweet boy too, but sometimes you don’t feel like wanting to tolerate a child. Faust was like the same age as you too! In demon years at least. How’d a teen even get into RAD I mean Mephisto is mad rich, man didn’t even know what a burger was. Does Faust know what a burger is? Maybe—
Ping!
It was your phone.
Oh!
If the brothers staring wasn’t uncomfortable before, it was downright scary right now. Whatever notification you got on your phone no one could see, but your visible happiness was enough to raise suspicion.
“Hey Beel you want the rest of my food? I’m gonna go for the night.” Said man happily took your plate, and you skipped joyfully to your room. Everybody patiently watched you go down the hall and disappeared. They glanced at each other, Beel still painfully and blissfully unaware. Asmo broke the silence when he jumped up, “See!! See what I mean!”
“Huh? What do you mean?” Innocently Beel perked up, mouth stuffed with food. Belphie sighed, “Beel have you not read the chat? MC’s got a crush.”
He stopped his chewing. Mammon flew up in a panic, “Y’know with how they reacted it’s probably not even a crush!! What if they’re dating someone!”
Lucifer dropped his spoon.
“Mammon!—“
“Aaaa! That’s so cuteee!!—“
“WHAT—“
“Shut u—“
“QUIET! ALL OF YOU!!”
Utensils hitting plates echoed throughout the room as everybody turned to Lucifer. “If it’s a crush, we can’t have MC interacting with other demons behind our backs, Diavolo knows what will happen,” he sighed, “as for dating…”
His expression tightened.
“MC is far too young, keep an eye on MC tomorrow.”
“Barbatos?”
“Yes, Young Master?”
“I’m sure you know what to do tomorrow.”
“Of course, Young Master.”