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If Theo were a better person, he would refrain from snorting loudly and coughing into his elbow at the fourth time in a row that Liam rattles through the apartment with a clatter. The thing is, Theo isn’t a better person, so he snorts loudly and coughs into his elbow anyway.
“Shut the fuck up,” Liam hisses without turning around from…whatever it is he’s handling with a concerning lack of dexterity or grace for a werewolf.
Theo holds up one hand from his book, even though his boyfriend can’t see him. They surely know each other well enough by now to read each other’s sarcastic tics without having to see them.
“Didn’t say a thing.”
“Okay, but you definitely thought it.”
“Oh, so you’re telepathic now? Thought maybe you should work on mastering bodily coordination first.”
Now Liam turns, characteristic Dunbar scowl in place. “If you’d just help me set up for the night instead of thinking snarky unhelpful thoughts, then I wouldn’t be dropping shit all over the place.”
Theo sucks his bottom lip between his teeth and rolls his eyes to the ceiling, as if considering. He decides to be an asshole instead and shakes his head. “Nah. It’s more entertaining to see you suffer.”
(Seriously, if Liam’s first words to Theo after asking him out were “I can’t believe I just willingly jumped into a relationship with Beacon Hills’ number one asshole,” then he really, really shouldn’t be expecting anything different.)
“Just because you don’t have control issues on the full moon doesn't mean you get a free pass to make fun of the rest of us.”
Theo officially gives up on trying to read his book and lets the spine thunk in the crack between his thighs. “Who said I don’t have control issues?”
“You,” Liam deadpans. “Multiple times, smirking, too, when you knew it was my time of the month.”
“Huh.” Theo thrusts his tongue in his cheek, faintly shaking his head. “Doesn’t ring a bell.”
Liam casts about for the nearest available projectile that will cause minimal damage to his boyfriend’s face, finds the embroidered felt miniature teddy bear Jenna had saved for him from that Christmas that Godiva sent her too many gift bears with the coffee, and launches it at Theo’s forehead. Theo doesn’t even bother dodging. The stuffed toy strikes him squarely between the eyes and thumps into his lap, and the chimera blinks down at it blandly.
“I’m serious,” Theo says, shrugging. “Have you ever even stopped to consider why you’re full of rage and destruction when it’s the full moon?”
“Oh, I don’t know,” Liam rejoins, one hand on his hip and the other twirling a length of chain sarcastically in the air. “Let me guess. Could it be the IED? My irritating boyfriend driving me to the edge of insanity? Oh, wait. The fact that I’m a fucking bitten werewolf?”
Theo rolls his eyes again and pushes himself off the couch with the flats of his palms. “Have you considered the fact that you need enrichment in your enclosure?”
“Enrichment in my—my—” Liam splutters as the meaning of Theo’s words hits him. His hold on the chain goes slack and the length slithers to the carpet with a series of clinks. “Are you seriously calling me a lab rat right now? To my face? When I’m T minus two hours from ripping your face off with my full-moon claws?”
“No,” says Theo with a straight face. “I’m calling you a dog.”
“You fucking—”
Theo easily sidesteps Liam’s punch to his arm. The chimera spins on his heel and catches Liam around the middle in the next breath, concealing a private smirk as the werewolf flails and hollers at him to let go. Theo simply squeezes his arms tighter around Liam’s belly, full-on grinning now as the beta bares his teeth and threatens him with halfhearted feints at Theo’s throat with his snapping jaws.
“See?” Theo says mildly. “What did I say. Dog.”
“I have plenty of enrichment in my enclosure,” Liam seethes, slumping now in Theo’s hold and letting Theo drag his dead weight back toward the couch. “I’ve got you and your useless, sarcastic ass to deal with.”
“Aww, love you too, Li,” Theo coos, infuriating the beta further. “What I meant was, stop trying to lock yourself up in some basement without some form of entertainment.”
At Theo’s meaningful pause, Liam fixes him with a squinty-eyed look. “Do not say chewy toy.”
Theo wasn’t going to, but now that Liam mentioned it, he lets a shit-eating grin spread syrupy slow across his face and says, just because he can, “Chewy toy.”
“I hate you.”
“Squeaky monkey.”
“I am not getting chained up with a squeaky monkey.”
“Fine. Tennis ball.”
“No. No balls.”
“Rubber ball?”
“No. No balls of any kind!”
Theo smirks again as Liam squirms against his hold, and he holds the beta’s eye contact suggestively. “Are you sure about no balls?”
“You are insufferable.”
“That’s a pretty big word for you.”
“Exasperating.”
“Uh-huh.”
“Incorrigible.”
“Oh, now we’re just hacking up the thesaurus, are we?”
“You,” says Liam, squirming even further and only succeeding in twisting closer till their parted mouths are an inch from each other, “are the worst anchor in the world.”
—
Six hours and several hundred feet of decimated underbrush and tree trunks later, Theo and Liam alight from the truck into the otherworldly glow of the single Denny’s on the far east side of Beacon Hills.
Theo slides a look sideways at Liam. “Still think I’m the worst anchor in the world?”
“In my defense, you’d said you had a night shift on this date. You could’ve spared me the agony of anticipating the full moon if you’d just opened your mouth and told me you’d switched up your schedule.”
“Aww, but where would be the fun in that?”
“You and I,” Liam huffs, dragging him down the sidewalk to the glass door of the diner, “have very different ideas of fun.”
“Yeah, you love me anyway.”
It speaks to the growth in their relationship that Theo can toss around a joke with the L-word like that, Liam knows, and even more so that Liam can roll his eyes at the chimera in response without triggering any of his old insecurities. “Don’t put words into my mouth.”
Theo heaves a put-upon sigh. “I’ll order you the Grand Slam Slugger.”
Liam pauses midway through the door and considers. “Okay, so maybe I love you a little bit.”
Theo reaches forward to brush a stray twig from Liam’s unkempt hair. Considering he has mud streaked down one cheek and grass clippings clinging to his other temple—and he definitely put his shirt back on inside out—the gesture is ineffectual at best. Still, Liam visibly melts and leans into the touch, his frown softening up into that ever-exasperated, still-besotted look in his eyes that Theo knows he reserves only for him. And after Theo spent all night having Liam chase him through the preserve to catch the squeaky monkey, Theo would say he definitely deserves that kind of look from Liam right now.
“Maybe you love me a lot,” Theo says with that teasing lilt in his voice, though there’s just the barest hint of uncertainty at the end.
Liam cradles the back of Theo’s hand—still frozen in his hair—with the warmth of his grubby palm. “Yeah,” he murmurs, grinning. “So maybe I love you a lot.”